Feathers & Ink

Caring for Daddy

2010-12-15T17:56:00.001-05:00

As my father endured his cancer treatments he often would feel so lousy that he simply couldn't bear company. I understood, but often wept once I was given the rejection call where he would tell me I wouldn't be able to come to visit. I often was all ready showered, dressed and in my car with the GPS set for Daddy's.... when the call would come asking me to retreat and come another day.
In the time since then, Dad fell on Oct. 21st, breaking his hip. It seems so unfair to have to deal with a broken hip on top of lung cancer. How could this have happened. He isn't a frail elderly gentleman who falls often. He is a vital 67 year old who was alert and not clumsy. He simply tripped on the oxygen cord that helps him to breathe. It all just feels so unjust.
Recuperation led to a horrible stay at Healthsouth Rehabilitation in Harmarville. I pray you never need to send someone there...and if you have a choice pick any other place, BUT them. The care he received there was incredulous. They were nasty and rude and insulting. We even nicknamed one of his nurses "Nurse Ratchet". He got out by having such a horrible yelling fit with the worst nurse that he had a breathing attack and was returned to St. Margaret's. We thought they were bad, but Healthsouth made St. Margaret's look like heaven. In this day and age of health care, the only way to be certain to get decent care is to have a healthy member stay in your room round clock to be certain of your care, if not doing it yourself altogether.
Though therapy is incomplete, we have decided it best for Dad to return home and simply remain there for the rest of his care. Nurses come and go and therapists as well who all help in his care. Mondays and Thursdays, Aunt Betty cares for Daddy and on Tuesdays and Wednesdays are my days.
I have come to love these days. It's a long drive, but it's a peaceful one with beautiful scenery and reminds me of God's beauty that lay in my path daily. The hours that I missed in trying to visit him in the past year are now mine to spend with him as long as I choose. It is a blessing to be with him this much and to be able to help him. I love playing "nurse" and love making my "patient" comfortable and bringing him lunch on a tray. Giving him back rubs that make him cozy and comfortable makes me feel so useful and I love knowing I am doing all I can for him. I love him so much and look at these moments as gifts. Kathy (my stepMom) is always so grateful bringing me meals, allowing me to do my laundry here (which is so helpful!). She has one of those sets of giant front loaders so I can double my laundry. So they are helping me as much as I am helping them... and that is a double blessing for all of us.
We have good days and bad... and I know that's how it's going to be. I am grateful for the good ones and do all I can for him in the bad. It is a blessing that my darling husband Brian also allows me to come here this much because things need taking care of at home, and he must step up to the plate. He also does things here, such as soon he will arrive to install a shower bar so Dad can take a safe shower. He installed a light and he and Shane and Zane even helped set up the hospital bed. I love my own family even more when I can see their compassion showing through for my Dad.
And then there are the friends and family and facebook prayer warriors who continually lift us all in prayer. I am so grateful for all of you who pray for him. Often I post a request on FB and by the next day, things are looking better.
Caring for Daddy is one of the life changing moments I will treasure always. I love every minute we spend together. Kathy tells me to go home before she gets here, but I simply can't... I must wait till she arrives to be certain he is cared for in every minute. I love being a "nurse" and I am so lucky to have these moments with him.
Keep praying! We are all so grateful to all of you who care enough to remember him in your prayers.

Update on Daddy & My Sons & Helmets

2010-05-27T13:50:00.006-04:00

Here we are... May 2010 and I looked at the blog and didn't even realize that it's been since August that I have posted.
First my father-- He is still hanging in there and fighting the good fight! He was accepted at the Cancer Treatment Center in Philadelphia. To fly there, a friend from his girlfriend's work allowed them to use their frequent flier miles for 4 trips! What a blessed gift that someone who never met my father was so willing to bestow upon him. I wish I could thank him in person! People truly are good and have wonderful giving hearts. I also acknowledge in gratitude the Angel Flights program for getting my father to his last 2 appointments! He flew in unique little planes with pilots who are gracious and kind. They won't accept a dime. They tell my father they know they are privileged to own a plane and this is their way of giving back. They fly from other areas like NY and NJ and Harrisburg, PA just to pick up my father and Kathy and take him to his appointments! What a glorious blessing for my Dad to get their safely and quickly and return the same way. So please continue to lift my father up in prayer that flights will continue to come and chemo will keep the cancer at bay! We are grateful for any prayers given and the result is 1 1/2 years after diagnosis... he is still with us! He can't wait to walk into the doctor's offices at the 2 year mark and tell them BALONEY to your months diagnosis. God has final say, not man! PRAISE GOD!
Life's priorities took precedence over any card making activities for sure. Though I miss my hobby greatly, my illness only allows me the time to finish my calligraphy work. I understand that, but hope to be able to visit my beloved card making hobby once again as well as jewelry making and watercolor artwork. I got a fabulous card spinner (FOR FREE!) from an old friend and bought a bunch of dog rubber stamps on ebay. While I have so many fun ideas in my head for cards, I never seem to have time to do them. So while this started out as a blog about card making, it's life we discuss now. Life around here is NEVER DULL!
It's rough being a Mom to two boys who make me feel like I have 8. Their exciting activities including dirt bike riding, BMX riding and skateboarding have kept me in the ER 3 times in one month! Zane broke his ankle skateboarding and is still healing. Shane had a painful abdomen attack and his BP dropped to 42 bottom number, scaring the crap out of me! Then Shane fell riding BMX with no helmet on and his new bike handlebars hit him in the lip knocking him unconscious. He then did a free fall 4 ft. to the concrete below and his head received the most damage. We spent hours in the ER of St. Clair Hospital and then an ambulance took us to Children's for better pediatric care. He was diagnosed with a severe concussion. He had no memory of how he did it, where he was, what color his bike was, who the president is. It was the most frightening thing in the world to hear my child continually repeat the questions over and over "What happened?" "Where am I?" "How did I do this?" "Where are we going?". He didn't know the color of his new bike or what kind it was (after weeks of searching for the perfect bike). He must have asked me 100 times or more. I knew then he had brain damage and I will never forget that day as long as I live.The next morning he became more cohesive as his memories came back to him. He remembered the bike and the president, and I sighed a huge sigh of relief to see him come back to his normal self.
After several tests at the concussion clinic of UPMC, we have discovered that he is still having learning issues 3 weeks later and all school work had to be cut in half as well as teachers needing to give him more time to complete all work.
I am grateful that he is going to be OK. I know it could have been so much worse and that he is very lucky. No chipped teeth (handlebars hit him in the lip and nose) no teeth damage at the dentist yesterday, the lip healed, all bloody places on his face quickly healed. His shoulder popped out for about a week or so. No broken bones were found. No bleeding was found under the skull. I never felt so much relief as the moments they told me all that Shane would be OK with time.
I will never again lose the battle over the helmet. I share his picture today so that if you know any children who don't wear them, may they see this photo and never end up like my sweet Shane did on that day.
Many people prayed for Shane that day and beyond and I will always be grateful for your care, concern and your thoughts sent to God on Shane's behalf. I believe you helped to make him well and will continue to do so as I ask you to pray for him still. Please lift my father too as he continues his battle with cancer. Life can be tough, but it's friends like you who help us all to make it through. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

UPDATE on my Daddy dear & More Prayer Requests

2009-08-16T19:28:00.014-04:00

Dad had lost his voice over the last few months. After going to the doctors they discovered a new tumor pressing on a nerve, causing him pain and difficulty while speaking. They are treating it with radiation and that is now over, and the next steps are the chemo. The chemo is new and goes quicker with less hair loss and best of all less nausea. He finds he is still extremely lethargic so I pray that his energy would rise up and let him be more of his old self once again.
I thank all of you who continue to pray and lift up my father.

PRAYER REQUESTS

I please ask you to also pray for my very dear friends who are all three battling breast cancers (in various stages and forms) Cheryl Weber, Sammie Murphy (Sammie's hubby Paul is also suffering from lung & bone cancer) & Missy Brownfield (our pastor's wife). All 3 women are undergoing treatments right now for breast cancer. Having been down this road with Shelly, I am of course extremely fearful for them... but have faith that the outcomes will be different than what happened with Shelly. We must remain faithful and be in continual talking with God. It's all that will get us through.
I love all 3 of these women dearly. I have known Sammie, since I was about 12 years old. She is a longtime friend of my Mom and her and I have also been close friends as I grew into my adulthood...my having a very close relationship with her daughter Jamie from birth. Sammie lives in Florida, so I will need to support her from afar in any way I can. I recently helped her with a letter trying to get her proper health care that she is fighting for under the CHAMPSVA, her husband has. I hope she gets what she is entitled to.

Cheryl Weber is my darling friend who brought me to Christ by inviting me to North Way Christian Community when I was grieving the loss of my third son Tanner. Cheryl has been there for me through his loss, as well as my speech at TCF to speak about his loss, along with bringing me meals when I had my surgery. We have grown together in the Lord and I was always happy to help her paint scenery for Vacation Bible School when her family decorated NWCC in the summers. Her family is very dear to me as well. She is such a loving, sweet person and I will be there for her in whatever way she needs me to.

And last, but certainly not least is the Pastor's wife Missy Brownfield. She is one of the kindest people you would ever meet. The way they welcomed us to Dorseyville Alliance Church as the family of the Pastor was so warm. I have never had a welcome like that! They even invited us to their home for a lovely luncheon to talk and get to know them better. We were sold on the friendliness of this great church and have been there ever since. Missy is sure to find you if you attend, and offer up a huge smile and a big hug every Sunday! Her joyous spirit is surely something that will come in handy during this battle. The good news for Missy is they got everything out with her surgery, there was no expansion into the lymph nodes and after radiation we are aiming for complete recovery!

TOBAC FAMILY SUMMER
I personally have been so busy WRITING, WRITING, WRITING... with the busiest season ever for my calligraphy. While it's great for the money, it's hard on my RSD and my carpal tunnel syndrome. I am grateful for the many orders from wonderful brides. It's been hard getting used to working at this level with RSD. I sometimes cry and wish I didn't have a business...but when I am feeling better, I start advertising on sites like Wedding Bee and such looking for more work. I have had orders from brides all over the country! I am grateful and honored to be a part of these many weddings. It is an honor to be trusted with such important work. It's become a full time job for me though, and I am not sure if I can handle it at times. Some mistakes were made, some unhappy brides, but anyone who operates a business can't operate at 100% perfection. NO one could... even someone who is healthy. So I had to try my best to make up for it by offering gifts to the unhappy brides and also to forgive myself. I hate when things like that happen and I truly hate when folks are mad at me. It is frustrating to work like this. My husband put it to me this way, this week... and he's absolutely right. He said, "You have a few days where you feel good and you think you are normal and you take on the world and try to do everything for everyone. Then the RSD kicks in and you remember that you can't do it." It's true and I need to remember that I have RSD and learn to ask for more time from clients, as well as not take on so many jobs, that I am unable to do them. Lessons learned the hard way eh?

As for our family... we have been camping in our new camper, a 2009 Grey Wolf. WE LOVE IT!!! We are so excited about camping and having fun in that thing. We try to go as much as possible, aiming for every other weekend as Brian works a lot in the summer and with my being busy as well, it's all we could fit in. Things have worked out for us to keep our home (HOORAY!) and we were even able to manage to purchase a new camper! I have been so extremely busy with calligraphy that I was able to help Brian come up with a down payment. Plus they give you 12 years to pay them off so the payment is extremely low (1/2 price of my car payment!). My car payments on my van "Myrna" (we call the minivan Myrna, after all she can't have a cool name, being a Dodge Grand Caravan and all ....LOL... the Queen of all minivans!) are soon over, so we can do this for sure. We are excited to take the boys camping, where they happily play and pick up girls. LOL They can now bring friends since it's way bigger than the old one! The old one was 16ft. and this one is 29 ft.! So I am grateful for my business taking off that it brought us our new fun camper!

Here is a picture of it... it's amazing and we are so thankful that things have worked out so that we are able to keep our home and were even able to purchase this! God is great and works things out if we wait patiently. I know, I know, I wasn't very patient! But He knows I am still ever thankful for all that we have.

This is the bedroom for me and Bri and the TV swivels into our side. Very cool! Came with a 20" flat screen.

The boys have a bunkhouse room at the other end, so they can bring friends.

And here is just the bumpout side where we eat and sit.

We are going to love this for years to come! Maybe we will see you at a campground! I am hoping to do a camping retreat for our bible study girls one weekend using my camper and some of the other girls' campers. It would be SO FUN!

Update on my Father

2009-06-30T21:37:00.003-04:00

As I suspected in my previous post, it is my father's cancer that is causing his loss of speech. There is a new tumor pressing on a nerve that has to do with speech. It actually hurts him to try to talk, so it's very difficult for him. The good news is he will be having surgery on the 8th that will hopefully correct this and give him back his speech! Let's pray that it works, so he can get about the business of going back to chemo for healing the rest of that cancer! We must address this problem first as it certainly affects his every day! Thanks again for praying and keep them coming! I love you all.
Tammy

Poor Daddy dear is still sick....

2009-06-17T01:16:00.003-04:00

I just felt the need to update you all on my Dad and his condition. Though he was administered antibiotics for his lack of voice, he still continues to be unable to speak and mentioned that it actually hurts to talk. He still feels very lethargic and is just plain tired of being sick. He has an appointment on Thursday to follow up, but I wish he had called earlier as it has been over 2 weeks without being able to speak. I surely hope it's not the cancer, and just the flu. Though with the horrible types of flu that have been going around, they certainly aren't easy to overcome either, because poor Shane was never so sick in his life. He is perfectly fine now and back to normal! Praise God and you for your kind prayers!
I just wish to ask you to pray a bit more for my father and for a bit longer and I will be ever so grateful. And while you are whispering in the ear of our God, could you say another couple of prayers for my dear friend Jeff Hoover who has been waiting forever for a kidney transplant! This boy has been through so much, I can't even begin to tell you. Just lift him in both spirit and health. And even more that the kidney he has waited for, for almost 2 years, will finally come through.
My bible study friend Robin's father recently passed away, and I attended the funeral last Friday. He sounded like a lovely wonderful man who touched many lives! Pray a blessing of peace and comfort over their family. Her Mom had to endure surgery this week for a cancer removal! This poor family is enduring so much right now. Please lift them all up as well.

We know there is power in prayers! So I come to you now once again for those wonderful prayers. And I thank you and remind you that should you need me ever to be there for you and kneel before the throne on your behalf, I am there!
love,
Tammy

Honeysuckles Dance in June... a summertime poem... by me ;o)

2009-06-15T21:16:00.004-04:00

As I have no time for cards with the busy wedding season upon me, I have decided to take a moment and share some poetry! I love to write poetry and you probably noticed from the poems I have written for Shelly, Ryan & Jimmy.
Since this blog has often been a memorial tribute space, I thought it was time to spruce it up with a few poems about fun things! Time to bring a smile (I hope) to anyone's face who cares to read it. LOL

The painting at left is called Picking Honeysuckle by artist Sophie Anderson. Click on the picture to go to a page to learn more about her and see more of her work.

Honeysuckles Dance in June

In dark of night,
while others slept,
my senses
suddenly took note
of a magical midnight show...

attention caught
by the wafting aroma

oh delightful smell of June
her sweet perfume
drawing me into her
late night show
bringing a smile
to my psyche

Familiar is the bouquet
instantly recognizable
aaah....take it in

the ever tiny
yet exquisitely fragrant

dancing honeysuckle
(take a bow)

perfuming the midnight air
a premiere performance
just for me!
(I applaud excitedly)

the tiny blossom
inspiring
nighttime poetry

accompanied by
her extensive orchestra

hark thine ear
to the incredible symphony
that plays at her feet...

chirping crickets
celebrate their gentle song
they sing it loud
they sing it long

sad for some
who at this hour of night
would rather dwell
asleep on pillows soft
and dream silently
of boring things
eyes closed and out of sight.

Oh fortunate me
my soul is here
exuberant
alive
awake!

the honeysuckle's
audience of one
ever grateful for
her pageantry

bravo! bravo!

alive oh my senses

astonishingly sweet
dancing honeysuckles
my senses doth greet
orchestras of crickets sing
Thank you
for the wonders of nature
dear God
you and the month of June
doth bring.

written by T.L. Tobac
June 2007

Update on Shane's swine flu! ....and thank you...

2009-06-11T02:57:00.004-04:00

Thanks so much for praying for the guys in my life, my son, my stepfather and my Daddy dear. What a rough week!
After hearing on the news that many local area children had been diagnosed with swine flu, I decided to take Shane to our pediatrician! And lo and behold, she said he had had swine flu! Oh mercy me! No wonder my poor boy was so sick. By the time he was at the doctor's, however, his fever had broken and he was no longer contagious, nor was he needing any further testing or anything. She said he would just be tired for a few more days and that he would recover fine. I think I may be better off finding that out at the end, as I don't believe I could have slept knowing my baby was suffering with swine flu! I do know that I had never seen him that sick before. Now crossing our fingers and saying a prayer that no one else in our family comes down with it! Whew! I got a speeding ticket on the way to the pediatrician's on the phone worrying about my stepfather! What a week last week was... unbelievable. But grateful for the good outcomes.
My Daddy dear (that's what I call him face to face LOL)-Tom, is still having struggles with his flu, though given antibiotics. I think it's just harder for someone with cancer to fight off everything that comes their way. He can barely speak, so please kindly continue to pray for him! I will let you know when he's back to "normal". He will likely need to start chemo up again fairly soon, after his respite of 3 months. I will be sure to let folks know as things change.
My stepfather, Marty, had his heart cath on Friday and everything looks good with him! Hooray! They believe he suffered some sort of attack that may only require an adjustment in his medications. So we area all grateful for that! No heart attack occurred and he didn't need any further stents or anything...the one in place is still looking good.
So I praise God for the good things and ask him to continue to work on healing my Daddy dear of both his flu and his lung cancer. There is power in your prayers and I am grateful to each of you for sharing that power with me. I am honored to pray for you as well, so please let me know anytime I can return the favor.
Love,
Tammy

Prayer Request for my Son, my Father, my Stepfather

2009-06-03T23:02:00.009-04:00

We have some health issues going on in my family outside of the normal prayer requests for my Father's ongoing cancer.
Shane, my 12 year old, (he turned 12 yeseterday and spent it in bed with no fun at all...poor baby), has been home sick all week with the flu. He has a high fever and is lethargic, can barely speak and is just plain miserable. I haven't seen him this sick for years.

Please pray that this would quickly pass and he would return to his normal lively self soon. We hope to celebrate his birthday with him soon as he had requested a celebration that includes a crab legs dinner and a sleepover with friends. We need him to get better before we can celebrate!

It felt so sad to see his birthday come and go without so much as a candle or song. He didn't even want us to sing. Poor baby. It came and went without celebration as he simply wasn't up to it at all. So while I should be here wishing him a happy birthday, I am instead asking for your prayers for his health to return to normal.

He won't even eat candy! Anyone who knows Shane, knows that's a sure fire sign, that he isn't well. Brian bought him a bag of mixed goodies, and he forced down a carmel and a couple of gummy worms, and that was the end of it. :o(

My stepfather, Marty, was having chest pains today at work in Washington, D.C. and went to the hospital. He was later released but will be driving home on Thursday morning for further testing here in Pittsburgh on Friday morning, including a heart cath. Please pray for safe travel mercies and that they would quickly get to the bottom of the pains with little discomfort for Dad.

And last but not least, my Daddy - Tom, whom you have been praying for, for his cancer. He has lost his voice and is pretty much just under the weather. He is sick and is coming around a bit but still has no voice and no energy. Pray for his continued healing from the bug that has hold of him and of course we continue to thank you and ask that you please continue to pray for complete healing from his cancer. In regards to the cancer, he continues to do very well, responding well to treatment and hasn't lost weight and is pretty spry, but for this bug. We are grateful for all good results and thank the Lord for the good work he is doing in my Dad.

Thanks so much for taking a moment to pray for my family... should you ever need the favor returned, I am here for you as well. Email me anytime.
Wishing you all healthy happy days with your families this summer.

Much Love,
Tammy

Goodbye to our friend - Big Jim Sollinger

2009-05-29T18:32:00.006-04:00

It is with sadness, that I offer the poem below. Our dear friend Jim Sollinger, or as his "bar friends" affectionately called him Toby, passed away last Saturday night at the age of 67. Jimmy fought a brave battle with lung cancer. Diagnosis to his final passing happened quickly taking only 8 weeks. We were rather shocked to see how quickly the cancer spread. His cousin Carolyn and her husband Bob took wonderful care of Jimmy through his illness. They will miss him greatly.

As my blog is often a memorial tribute ... I wish to share Jimmy with all of you.
Brian has known Jimmy since he was 12 years old. Jimmy used to work with Bri's big brother Lenny at the time. Through the years Jimmy and Brian remained very close friends. Jimmy helped work on both of our houses. When we had a dog that didn't quite fit into our family, she chose Jimmy to be her new Doggy Daddy. She followed him around our home, constantly looking at him with those big expressive eyes, begging him to save her from the chaos that is a home with 2 boisterous boys. LOL We thought she was a good pet for our family but she did much better with an older owner with no children. Trixie and Jim remained good buddies through the past 5 years and I know she is missing him big time. Luckily Jimmy's other friend Scott was kind enough to adopt Trixie into his family where she is now being loved with their other dogs.
Brian was a pall bearer at the funeral and Carolyn asked if he would say something at the funeral. Brian is not a person to speak in front of a crowd. As I watched the color drain from his face at the mere thought of doing that, I stepped in and offered to do it for him.
I hate attending a funeral, where nothing personal is said about the person who has died. They lived a life full of friendship, family and fun. While it's always difficult to say something at a funeral... Jimmy was worthy of being shared. Being quite the character, I decided to write a poem about him and include some pictures. His face is dirty in the picture with the other gentlemen, one being my husband Brian (with that late 80's perm! LOL) and the other their friend Mike, because they were working on remodeling our home in Etna. They were obviously in the demolition phase. The other is at the housewarming party for the same home and Jim is making one of those classic goofy faces.
He was a kind man, a funny man, a man with a big heart and even heartier laugh. He will be missed by many friends in Lawrenceville and especially by my husband, his friend for always, Brian. I was very touched with my husband's reaction to Jimmy's death... he cried more than I had imagined he would. A true testimony to his friendship. I present to you now, the poem I wrote about Jimmy and read at his funeral. It's a tad humorous too, so you will get a better idea of the man he was. Thanks for letting me share Jimmy.

Whether you knew him for many years,
or if you had only just met.
Jimmy is one of those crazy characters
you could never ever forget.

With a happy twinkle in his eyes
and the heartiest laugh you'll ever hear.
A cigarette in one hand
and in the other an Iron City beer.

Some folks called him Toby,
while others called him Big Jim.
It matters not which name you chose
You always had a friend in him.

He was a rather well known man
a self made king of Lawrenceville
and when he hit that football poll
it gave him quite a thrill!

Spinning records to the masses
He was our DJ man.
He even DJ'd our wedding
with a mike and a beer in his hand.

Always hanging and eating with Billy
even fighting with him too!
But they loved each other anyways.
Their friendship was true blue.

Hanging out at Salac's bar
and even some bars in between.
You would really him holler,
when he won on that poker machine.

Our Jim was always happy
you would never find him down
always smiling and laughing right out loud,
you would never see him frown.

He helped Brian build our houses
with his stong and loving hands.
You could always hear him coming,
in that beat up hippie van!

Years he spent working with Lenny and Brian
and Kevin & Bruce at First Glass
The upholstery store with his new friends.
Who knew it would all end so fast?

He loved his sweet dog Trixie
and boy how she loved him too.
Say a little prayer for his canine friend
though she now lives with Scott's family
I know she's feeling blue.

He loved his aunt and cousins,
they were there when things looked grim.
Caroline even gave him a bell,
so she and Bob could take good care of him.

We sadly now must say good-bye
Your soul now heaven will claim.
I know that our hearts and Lawrenceville
Will never be the same.

But our Good Lord made us a promise.
That who so ever believes in Him.
Will one day be reunited
With our friend and brother Big Jim.

And when you get to heaven
as you near those pearly gates,
There Big Jim will stand
with a beer in his hand
laughing out loud as for you he waits.

written by Tammy L. Tobac
for our dear friend Jimmy Sollinger

Bonnie & Clyde - the Birdfeeder Bandits ;o)

2009-05-20T23:58:00.009-04:00

HMMmmmm.... just what is that sticking out of my birdfeeder, made by my older son Zane?
Why it's the Birdfeeder Bandits! Caught in the act!
I swear I am going to have the fattest squirrels in West Deer Township, because this thieving duo has wiped out both of my bird feeders of ALL content, several times over this winter! Somewhere is a squirrel lair filled with about 50 pounds of birdseed!
Nothing deters these little buggers. I even pulled one of their tails when I got close enough, and they still came right back!

Care for a look at my friend Clyde from a ... uh, more pleasing perspective rather than bottoms up!
He's rather darling, even if he is a petty thief for a living!

Here he is with his accomplice, the fair furred Bonnie, helping themselves to not just one birdfeeder, but two! They think it's their own personal buffet. ;o)

How can I stay mad at one of God's sweet creatures? After all.... look at that sweet little fuzzy face!
And that very full tummy. ;o) I think he was posing for me to show me how he'd won the battle! They have won! My birdfeeder sits empty, until we can find some way to keep them from emptying the entire thing in one sitting!
We made it far too easy as it's right at their level on our deck. LOL
Anyone out there have any ways to keep my Bonnie & Clyde out of the birdfeeders?

Happy Mother's Day, Update on my Dad, and the Blog goes on....

2009-05-12T22:40:00.005-04:00

I wish all of you fellow Mommies out there a very happy belated Mother's day! I hope that you got breakfast in bed, or brunch out with family (what our family did) and hand made cards and gifts that touched your souls. My son Shane made me a lovely computer created chart denoting that he thought I am Loving, Friendly, #1 Mom, Very Craftsy (lol-new word, don't you love it?) and Fun to go to Concerts With (My favorite!). I love the thought he put into it. My older son, well, let's just let that one go, shall we? What can we do to make our boys be more thoughful and caring? LOL My hubby has lovingly allowed me to go for a facial (which I will blissfully submit to once my business slows down a bit!).
I attended a mother/daughter banquet at my Mom's church (my old childhood church) this evening. It was delightful to visit with old friends and to share an evening with family and my darling goddaughter Brianna. Dinner was delish and cake from the Oakmont bakery was the perfect end to this perfect evening!

Mother's Day was also a day for me to think about my dear friend Shelly and the first Mother's Day her children had without her and her own mother who struggled to survive her first Mother's Day without her daughter in it. My heart broke at the thoughts of 4 children who I am sure felt a huge void in their Sunday. I watched Good Morning America on Friday morning followed by Regis & Kelly and all of the worthy moms they honored. One of course had me sobbing aloud as I heard the letter from a Mom who knew she had little time due to the cancer that ravaged her body, but had written and asked for a basketball court for her sons and husband. She had taken the time to set up little boxes for their future milestone moments where they were to receive gifts from a Mom who would no longer be here on this earth, but chose to gift them from beyond the grave at their graduation, wedding, etc. She sadly died, before Regis & Kelly were able to grant her wish, but her children and husband were thrilled at the new basketball court that was given to them. There wasn't a dry eye in the house.
It made me grateful to just be here... here with my sons. Able to hug them. Able to see them grow into young men. Able to care for them, despite my own health issues, into the future. There but for the grace of God, go I. So this Mother's Day I was grateful to just be with family and friends and to share hugs and smiles. What could mean more?
AND THE BLOG GOES ON..... AND THE BLOG GOES ON.....
(singing like Sonny 'n Cher!- you know you were too!)
I am reviving this tired blog after a lengthy time of solitude. I have decided, that though I have very little time to play with my rubber stamps and create cards, which was what this blog was originally intended for... I am still living life and feel a need to share good things and thoughts and perhaps it's time to bring this blog back to life with a new purpose! A daily gratitude journal. A place for poems and thoughts and prayers. A place to catch my breath and share just LIFE.
Though I won't be sharing cards for a while, I am grateful for the work that has come my way in the form of my calligraphy business. I am happily snowed under in wedding orders. While it is often overwhelming and no one can really help me with the writing aspect of it, I am happy to pay others to help with folding and ribbon tying and even today paid my nephew to chauffeur my tired, lagging butt around town to deliver artwork to a gallery who requested art of me to display in their church gallery. It was an honor to be asked and a challenge to complete the task during this very busy time of year. But it felt good to finish it at last this morning and to see it hanging on the walls of the Westminster Presbyterian Church in Upper St. Clair. Jenny Gallo, the curator found my art online at my calligraphy blog and asked me to be her artist for the month of May. No one has ever considered my work to be a collection, so it was truly a privilege!
UPDATE ON MY FATHER -- After a recent trip to Florida with his sister to visit their southern brother Joe, he is feeling quite well! He was allowed to have a 3 month break from all chemo treatments and welcomed it quite willingly! No medical tests, no needles, no blood giving, no chemo for 3 whole months. I am glad he got this reprieve and glad he used it to it's fullest with a plane trip to Florida and a joyful time with his siblings.
I still have other friends who are struggling with health issues, such as Jeff who needs a kidney transplant, Mary Ellen who is being treated for cancer and our dear friend Big Jim, who now also has lung cancer and various cancerous spots throughout his body. I ask that you just take a moment and say a little prayer for these kind people as I thank you again for praying for my father.
So, as the blog goes on... I will be here more often, not with cards, but life.
la de da da dee.... la de da da daaaaaaa... and the blog goes on, and the blog goes on.....

Update on my father...

2009-03-06T19:20:00.004-05:00

Thank you so much for praying for my father. After about 7 chemo treatments we were excited to hear that his tumors were shrinking! The doctors were amazed and we were all extremely grateful. To make his chemo a bit easier on him, they decided to put a port in his chest. Well the port ended up bringing with it a horrible life threatening staph infection. After weeks of antibiotics and a week in the hospital, he is at home still having antibiotics administered via a pick-line. We are hoping that the infection has at last cleared and chemo may resume shortly. I can't thank you all enough for lifting my father before our Lord. He is grateful for your prayers and thought and concerns as am I. Please continue to lift him in prayer, as he continues on this journey of life with this dreadful disease cancer.
I will be taking a moment right now to lift all of you who read this before our Lord with a little prayer for you my friends.
Lord, bless all who read these words, all who took the time to pray for my father. May this year be a year full of blessings of health, joy, love and peace. May they find comfort in your presence in their daily walk and may they find joy in every aspect of their lives with their family.
I pray a prayer of protection over all of these friends and thank you for all the answered prayers of those who prayed for me and my father. In Jesus name, I thank you. ...... Amen.

URGENT Prayer Request for my Daddy Dear

2008-11-21T18:19:00.001-05:00

Daddy Dear (that's what we call each other) and Me

First I come to you asking for your forgiveness for my absence from these pages but I come to you with an urgent prayer request for my Daddy that I will explain after explaining my absence.

After Shelly's death, I found it most difficult to create cards as I had very little creative spirit left in me for quite some time. Things kept happening in my life that kept me from the task of making cards and filling swaps and to tell the truth my heart sadly was not in it one bit. It seemed so trivial to make cards and care about those things in light of all that I was enduring in my life. I still owe one swap out to a group of women on Splitcoast Stampers and I promise you all (if you are reading this) that I will still fill that swap as soon as I am able. Things got so crazy that I had to step back and set all of these types of things aside and just walk away from it for a time.
This was originally supposed to be a blog about cards and yet it has become a blog about my life. It has also been very difficult to read as most of the news has been extremely morose and tragic. This year has been one of the worst years of my life, filled with sadness at every turn. I wish I were writing about fun things and bringing joy to people's faces, like I once did.
Things I once thought were tragic in my life, like the possibility of losing my house (which never sold during the summer, so we are still suffering financially over having to retain it), or even having a painful disease such as RSD, have become quite trivial in comparison to all the loss that has taken place since the beginning of the year.
First off in January, as my blog reflected, the life of Ryan Maseth filled my blog pages with the story of his tragic death in Iraq. His family, still mourning his loss, are still searching for answers to the reasons for his death and hoping to protect others from suffering this same horrible death by electrocution. I pray that Cheryl and her family get answers, restitution, assurance that no other soldiers will ever die the way that Ryan has, but most of all I wish them peace.
Next came the deaths of 2 people I also knew and cared for, as my nephews grandparents both perished in an accidental carbon monoxide poisoning incident. They left the car running in the garage by mistake and both of them died in the house together. Their family lost both the mother and the stepfather in one fell swoop and it was so sad to behold.
Then came my surgery for my second incurable disease achalasia. While it was bothersome to learn I had another illness that will progress to a point of losing my esophagus. I will deal with that if and when it happens. For now, it is not my focus once bit. The surgery corrected the terrible choking fits I was having where I couldn't breathe... so for that I am grateful. My health matters are nothing compared to the painful life losses I have had.
Next came the prayer requests that all of you are well aware of for my friend Shelly Tomasic who was also Ryan Maseth's aunt (so this family is suffering in ways we could never have imagined having lost 2 members in 6 months). She suffered a return of her breast cancer that eventually led to her death in June of this summer. Shelly's death truly tormented my spirit. It's so hard to comprehend why such a loving soul must be taken from our presence... when she shed such light and joy and the light of Christ into every one she met. My love for her since we were 9 years old and our friendship through the years was one I will always treasure. Her loss has left a huge hole in many lives and I am still learning to live with the sting of her leaving us, even if I know that through her faith in Jesus Christ she is in heaven. I know that I will one day see her again and in that I have hope.
Next came the death of my friend Capri Walker, a fellow Angel Mom (we are a group of moms who have had the death of a child - Cappy lost 3 children). Capri was only 51 years old. She lived in Kenosha, Washington where she was brutally murdered by the neighbor boy - age 14 and his 15 year old cousin. They broke into her home to steal an X-Box and her cell phone and wallet. When Cappy came upon them (they thought she wasn't home), they beat her to death with a baseball bat. I am still dumbfounded at this senseless murder of a wonderful sweet woman whom I once went away on a retreat with in the Smoky Mountains to share the loss together of our children. Many lives were destroyed that night in an utterly disgusting display of human evil.
Still reeling from that death, I learned another friend from my former bible study group, who had recently beat cancer, had died of a sudden heart attack. The irony of beating the cancer only to succumb to a heart attack is another blow to my psyche, so hard to comprehend. Her name was Kathy Hall and she was a sweet and wonderful woman who will be greatly missed by all who knew her.
My former leader of our Pittsburgh TCF chapter also passed away this summer. He was a kind man and I consider he and his wife to be friends. Even though we knew David was going to pass and he beat the length of time that the doctors originally gave him, his death still added to the pain in my all ready tear-filled life.
All of these things had led to a somewhat depressive state and an inability to be creative. When I tell people about the year we have had, it almost sounds unreal. How I wish it were and I would wake up and find it to be just that. But it's sadly a reality I pray no one ever has to face.

Now I come to you with the most important prayer request I will ask of you...
Above you see a picture of my father and me at a recent wedding we attended. His name is Tom Dolby and he was recently hospitalized because he was having trouble breathing. After finding a tumor on his lung, he was diagnosed with inoperable, incurable lung cancer. I have cried buckets of tears over this diagnosis as Daddy was already dealing with bladder cancer. I wish he didn't have to go through this painful disease. I wish NO ONE ever had to suffer from cancer. I am certain it touches the life of every living being.
My prayer request to all of you who are still out there listening... is to please pray for a miracle for him. Pray for him to lean on the Lord in this difficult time and pray for a miracle to release this cancer from his body.
My focus for the next year will be to attend to my father in any way he could possibly need me. I want to be there for him and let him know he is loved beyond words and that he isn't fighting this thing alone. We are there with him! Standing in the gap in prayer and love. We are praying hard that he can beat those odds and get this horrible cancer out of his system. Please fight with me!

Please pray with me, forgive me and let me know that you are still out there listening.

I hope one day this blog will return to what what it once was ... and that is to become my creative outlet for card making and other artistic endeavors. For now though... this life has been interrupted by tragedies and a need to love and care for those whom I lost and those who need me now.
Love you all. I missed you and hope to post more soon.

A poem for Shelly Tomasic

2008-07-12T00:54:00.005-04:00

I knew a poem would come for my darling friend Shelly. I just knew that in the days just after the loss of this precious life, the emotions were far too raw and the impulse to write had vanished in the weight of the sadness.
I wish I could have read this at her funeral, though I was honored to read the scriptures. I want everyone to know just how precious she truly was to me. I hope someone is still out there wishing to hear more about her, for her life was truly worthy of our devotion.
I miss her so much and can't even bear the thought of our world without her beautiful soul in it.
Thank you for sharing in my love for my dear friend Shelly.

The poem...

Our Shelly

What beauty was bestowed
upon such a lovely soul
within as well as outward
God's grace imparted
so many
glowing attributes
that one could not help
but to immediately
fall in love with

Our Shelly.

With one look into
her lovely blue eyes,
her kind spirit shined
and we
who were lucky enough
to have glimpsed
those sparkling eyes
saw peering from within,
a delicate radiance
reflecting her kindness
beaming eternally
from the soul of

Our Shelly

But ah,
it was her smile
that warm, inviting smile
that beamed before
each friend
and even towards strangers
and ever more so
at the sight of
her cherished family
a smile that shined so bright
it could illuminate the world
a blessing from above

Our Shelly

It was a
precious treasure
to receive that heartfelt smile
and to share
in the cheerful laughter
of memories we made
and joyous times
we shared with

Our Shelly

Great lessons
we are left to learn
from a teacher
such as her
flowed
kindness,
unconditional love,
grace,
humility
and above all
her spotless Christianity
taught to us
ever always by example
to live her life as He did
every day a walk with Jesus
worshipping Him in praise
never waivering from that path
thankful always for His love
devoted to His word
even to the end
no one loved her Lord
quite like

Our Shelly

Treasures she has left behind
in the path she laid for us
for it was a wonderful gift
to be
in the devoted circle
that surrounded her
in this affliction
the many loving friends
and family
privileged to be a part
of tending to her needs
by their faithful hands
embracing her with love
as together we cared for

Our Shelly.

Little did we know
how short our time
would be
to love and tend to her
and to gather up
sweet moments
and precious memories
we shared with

Our Shelly

Oh how our tears
stream earthward bound
for the sadness
that befalls
our own world
for we have lost a luminary
that simply
cannot be replaced
for no light I know
shined brighter
than the faithful heart and soul
of

Our Shelly.

We who were blessed
to share in this precious life
should yearn
and strive to be
a genuine reflection of
all that she esteemed to be
remembering her always
by trying to be more like

Our Shelly

May she live on forever
through our own thoughts and deeds.
We who too believe
in the God that she adored
know one heavenly day
that worlds of pain and heartache
will then be washed away
by the promises of her Lord
when our earthly time is over
and our Father calls us home
that one sweet glorious day
we will be
forever reunited with

Our Shelly.

For now,
each one of us remain
here on this earthly plain
forever changed
by her genuine embrace,
her joyful laughter,
her beauty and grace,
her Christ-like demeanor,
her sweet humility,
having felt
her absolute love
the likes of which
we may never see again
and the never ending light
that shines on through us
forever and always
touched by

Our Shelly.

written by her friend
since we were 9 years old
who is still loving you and missing you
my dear Shelly,

Tammy Tobac ~ July 11, 2008

Shelly Tomasic today entered heaven...Funeral Arrangements

2008-06-21T15:01:00.019-04:00

Shelly Tomasic - We will love you and miss you forever.

Double click on the photos for larger version.
To save a photo to your computer, right click on it and save it for yourself on your computer.

Bill & Shelly

A family of 6 ~ A family who loves one another so deeply.
Ally & Sam, Will holding Gabby and Shelly & Bill.

Shelly and her children ~ the light of her life.

The Tomasic Family

Shelly's smile, lighting up the world wherever she went.

Shelly Tomasic

- Our amazing, beautiful, perfect friend
& Faithful Sister in Christ,

Perfect, Loving Wife to Bill,

Loving & Devoted Mother to Ally & Sam,
& Will & Gabby,

Adored Daughter of Mary Ann & Paul Link
& Paul Pribik,

Kind & Compassionate Sister to Debbie,
Cheryl & Paul, Jr.,

And Beloved Friend to hundreds of us
who love her and will miss her always,
passed into heaven this morning ~ June 21st, 2008.

The heavens today receive a glorious soul.
Shelly today meets Jesus, the devotion of her life.
We know all pain and cancer have ended.
The many tears shed here will be tiny mirrors
that reflect the love that we have for her.
No one was more faithful
in her fight against this disease.
Rest now in Jesus arms my dear friend
....rest and be well.
Until the day we meet again.

Isaiah 57:1-2
The righteous are taken
and no one ponders in their heart;
devout men and women
are taken away
and no one understands
that the righteous are taken
to keep them from all the evil in the world.
Those who walk uprightly
enter into My peace;
they find My rest as they fall asleep in Me.

"To laugh often and love much;
to win the respect of intelligent persons
and the affection of children;
to earn the approbation of honest citizens
and endure the betrayal of false friends;
to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others;
to give of one's self;
to leave the world a bit better,
whether by a healthy child,
a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
to have played and laughed with enthusiasm
and sung with exultation;
to know even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived
- this is to have succeeded." -

-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Shelly has succeeded,
for she is everything that the poem above embodies.
She has touched so many of us.
I wish I could be more like her,
she was the most Christ-like person I have ever known on this earth.
Never an unkind word for another living soul.
Though we are heartbroken here, those of us who love her,
we know through the promises of her Lord and Savior,
we WILL see her once again if we only believe.
Our faith would be of the utmost importance to her.
I know for a fact
that Shelly would not want one person
to be angry with God
or to lose their faith over her passing.
I ask for your prayers over all of Shelly's family and friends.
Shelly is at peace, and we will shed our tears
at the thought of a world
without such a wonderful human being,
so loving and so beautiful as her in it.
If only people in this world
could show 1/10th of the kindness to each other
that she shared with all who crossed her path,
the world would be a fabulous place.

Like Shelly who never said Good-bye, only See Ya...
Yes my friend...
One day I will see you in Heaven.
Till then I say I love you and will miss you forever and always.
Love,
Tammy

Funeral Arrangements
for Shelly Tomasic

Shelly L. (Pribik) Tomasic
TOMASIC SHELLY L. (PRIBIK) Age 43, of Shaler Twp. on Saturday, June 21, 2008. Beloved wife of William R. Tomasic; loving mother of Alexandra, Samantha, William III and Gabriella Tomasic; dear daughter of Paul Pribik Sr. and Mary Ann Pribik-Link and Paul Link; dear sister of Deborah Hopkins, Cheryl Harris and Paul Pribik Jr.; daughter-in-law of William and Joann Tomasic; also survived by many loving aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews and cousins. Family to receive friends 2-4 pm & 6-8 pm Monday and Tuesday at the BOCK FUNERAL HOME, LTD., 1500 Mt. Royal Blvd., Glenshaw. Funeral service will be held on Wednesday at 11 am in Bethlehem Lutheran Church, Glenshaw. Friends invited. In lieu of flowers, memorial donations may be sent to the Shelly Tomasic Fund, c/o FNB Bank, 100 Federal Street, Pittsburgh, PA 15212.

imikimi - Customize Your World

God understands when we lose someone we love...

2008-06-19T16:48:00.002-04:00

This video is of a phone conversation between a young boy and a CBN (Christian Broadcasting Network) show. It's so simple and yet so wise as the man says back to Logan. I felt it perfect timing to share it.
Just listen....

Please pray for Shelly

2008-06-14T19:26:00.003-04:00

At last I share with you a picture of the angel that you have all been praying for, my darling and dear friend Shelly Tomasic. I ask your continued prayers for Shelly. She has taken a turn for the worse and has spent much of this week in the hospital. She has now been taken to her sister's home and hospice has been called in. Only immediate family will be permitted to visit with her now.
Shelly asked for me on Sunday and I am so grateful that she did. I got to sit at her feet and to hold her hand, kiss her head and tell her I love her. She of course replied that she loved me too, as we always did.
I still cannot fathom why such a beautiful soul as Shelly has been allowed to suffer with such a hideous disease as the cancer that ravages her body as we speak.
She is one of the kindest people I have ever known. No one in my life emulates Christ more than Shelly. She is a walking light of Christianity and the world needs more people like her.
I ask that you continue to pray for her that God will be merciful in either granting her a miracle or at least that she wouldn't suffer.
I ask you to pray for Shelly's children and husband as they must be at her side during this difficult time. I ask you to pray for Shelly's parents and siblings as they know all too well the pain of loss, from having lost their family member Ryan (the Green Beret) in January. And last but not least I ask you to pray for us her friends. Anyone whose life is touched by Shelly's will be deeply devastated at the turn of events of this week.
I wrote this poem earlier in Shelly's illness and I still pray for that miracle now. I thank you all for your prayers now and in the future.
love,
Tammy

Lament for Shelly

Oh faith you are a fragile thing
when prayers are left
to our imagining
and answers we beg and desire
and pray to You with fervent fire
seem to lay in useless dust
removing from me all my trust

for I cannot begin to comprehend
a God who'd let a life like this end
a God who could heal by His mighty hand
a God who has the power to against it stand

to stand upon the word of God
that she so fervently believes
A God who has the power
to remove this sickening disease

I pray in endless pools of tears
for Shelly and her family's fears
Why must this faithful servant be tried?
We're sending angels to her side!

With every prayer be lifted high~
Surely You won't let her die!
What is this battle you allow??
I pray a miracle come to her right now!

I thank You in advance I pray
as I await that glorious day
when You will do as we desire
and take all cancer with Your fire!

I pray they one day view a scan
and they who are but mortal man
will say, "It simply cannot be!"
as Shelly will be cancer free!

And Lord, all glory will be yours
We who pray, we will adore!
Adore the One who healed our friend.
Who dared not let her sweet life end.

Your Name will then be lifted High!
Hosanna to our God, we'll cry!
All glory laud and honor be
to You Oh Lord, Our Majesty!

All Hail the King of miracles
The King who brings out cancer cures.
The King who loves his servants fair.
The King we know is always there.

For faith is but a fragile thing,
when left at the throne of you Our King.
We must now wait upon Your will.
Know You are God and then be still.

Off to the Big Apple!

2008-05-28T11:25:00.002-04:00

My best friend since 5th grade, Pam, is having a Sweet Sixteen birthday party for her daughter Taylor this weekend in NY, where they live. Happy Birthday Taylor!!!!

With all that has been going on in my life I thought I was unable to go to the party, so I sadly mailed back my RSVP with a no in the checked box.
Pam called me Monday to say she just couldn't plan her seating for her table and not have me there. So she got her income tax check and she is buying me a train ticket to head to NY for the party!
Wooohooo! Wasn't that super nice of her! Thanks Pam, here's to you!
Can't wait to relax on the 9 hour train ride and head out without worrying about swaps that are late, calligraphy orders that are late, or keeping a perfect house for a potential buyer.
I get to get dressed up in a gown and feel like a queen.
And just have fun and visit with my friend. That will be me on Friday night. LOL Just kidding. I don't drink with my medications.
I am so looking forward to this trip. I leave tomorrow! So hopefully when I return I will again have some cards to share with you as well as trip photos!
Hope everyone has a fabulous week and a fun weekend!
I am off to the party first thing in the morning!

Boy am I tired! Packing up is hard to do!

2008-05-19T23:01:00.006-04:00

I haven't been around for days, due to our preparing our home to sell. Here is the link: Our Home West Deer (3 BR, 2Bath, one whirpool tub, swimming pool, office on first floor, huge dining room/kitchen on 14.5 acres in West Deer Twp., PA-if anyone is looking!)
My home was built by my darling husband just 5 years ago. We lovingly picked everything that went into and where every room would be. It's been so hard to know that soon it will no longer be ours. It takes so much energy, both mentally and physically to pack it all up. (Everyone should buy stock in the Rubbermaid company, because I think we bought them out of bins!) For about a month and a half now, we have been packing up the personal things and clutter and putting them in plastic bins (so the mice can't get in from the garage). We painted all the walls beige (insert giant yawn in right here - the artist in me abhors white and beige walls!). We got beige carpet for all over the house, which while it does look very nice, is still one of those things that make me yawn. Most of my pictures (which I LOVINGLY chose for my home) have all been packed away along with my favorite little knick knacks and such. The hard part is when everyone comes into the house and tells you how great your home looks without your things in them. I find it rather insulting and have grown rather weary of hearing it from everyone (including my own children) who comes into the house. For me ...it has been like slowly erasing little pieces of me, with every package that disappears into the garage. Left in the sterile beige environment, ripping down all of my wallpaper borders and things that made my home mine, has made me a tad depressed. I refused to let them paint over my boy's Coca Cola Polar bears mural (it's on this blog if you want to see it), hoping that some child who may move into the house will love it as much as my own children first did when we moved in here.
Tonight, after a full day of cleaning, we had our first showing. We were down to the wire here! The people were pulling in as we were taking that last bag of garbage out the door. We were still mopping and wiping toilets right up till the moment they walked in. What a nightmare!
I hope it sells quickly so we don't have to continue to live in this bland world of beige for much longer. Plus keeping it clean for potential sellers is going to be a nightmare for my 2 boys! They are messy little beings!
Speaking of my children, they can have it like this for a while, but the next house, it's back to my colored walls and carpet. I have told them, that when they grow up, they may decorate their homes however they choose. But as for me, I have waited all my life for my dream home, and to now have to give it up is so hard. The new home will be my fresh canvas and the creativity will flow once again. The artist in me will NOT be stifled! It's my home...and I will make the new one a world of colors once again.
The hard part is just not knowing where we will end up. It's impossible to look, until we have our own home sold and under agreement. So I have been gathering homes to a list, but not making appointments until we know for sure. It's hard to have your life in such upheaval, not being able to find so many things when you need them and not knowing what is around the bend. I look forward to the day when at last we will be in another house, where I can lovingly make it into a home. My home.
I think I will share a card today too...one that is in my SCS gallery so some of you may have seen it. But I haven't posted it to my blog. So here goes.
This is a card I made back in March for my Birds/Bees Swap. I love this bird stamp, it's so detailed. I had stamped it on shimmery white cover stock, so the coloring was a bit tricky. But I still like how it turned out. The BG is cuttlebug swirls and the word hope is stamped from a SU set. The ribbon is shimmery too. They took a very long time to color, using the prismacolor gamsol technique. I added a few stickles to the flowers to dress them up. I wanted to share the hope card, because ...I need a little hope right now.

Happy Mother's Day - You are going to LOVE this video!

2008-05-11T06:42:00.003-04:00

I want to wish all of you wonderful women out there a Fabulous Mother's Day!
May you rest and retreat and be swept off your feet!
May you be pampered and made to feel sweet.
May you get flowers and breakfast in bed.
May you feel joy at the cards you have read.
I pray you know of the treasure you impart
with each loving gesture that tends to your heart.
Not only the love of your family too...
but the love of your friends as I say... I love you!

Now...for a laugh and a moment of truth.... ENJOY THIS VIDEO! You are gonna love this!

THANKS are in order to several folks!

2008-05-02T14:41:00.012-04:00

First of all let me say a HUGE THANK YOU TO!! TO MISS GINA K! If you go to her blog you will see the winner of a set of MEGABILITIES Scalloped Rectangles...and guess who it is! It's ME! I can't believe I won those! How truly exciting. Gina K. is such a generous Blog Candy giver. What a blessing it was to receive that on a day when I was having a lot of pain from my RSD and just feeling blue from all that's going on in my life right now. I will be sure to let you know when I get them by posting a card or two made with them.

Then there are some RAK (Random Acts of Kindness) that should have been posted long ago. I vow not to give up until I have thanked them all! It may take a bit of time...but here are a couple of cards I got when I had my surgery! (I also have cards from folks who sent one to me with Shelly's cards - how kind those SCS girls truly are! I will post those at another time.)
The first one is from sweet Jessica (Jlazarski on SCS). She sent me my favorite kind of card of course, the House Mouse! Isn't he adorable? I am itching to buy that stamp after seeing this card. Click on it for a close up so you can read the mouse's sign. It will make you laugh out loud!

The second one is from Asela! After I won her blog candy of a complete set of her clear stamps for Easter which you can see here: Easter Stamps Winner
I was so excited and I did use them several times, to make everyone in my family an Easter card with, plus I used them in an Easter swap too! But guess what I did...sent them ALL OUT without PHOTOGRAPHING one of them! What a goof.
When I thanked her for the winning stamps, I had mentioned then what a great highlight to my day it was, because I had been recovering from my surgery. She kindly sent me the lovely get well card above enclosed with my winning stamps...and what a beauty it was! I had to share it here. It's even prettier in person with the little glitter and rhinestones and everything. Just an amazing card and I was honored to get it! Thanks Asela & Jessica for thinking of me and sending such great cards!

RSD - I have it. What is it?

2008-05-01T11:09:00.007-04:00

RSD is the name of the disease that has a hold on me. I felt the need to explain it as I have mentioned it to so many of you. Plus, getting awareness out for this disease is helpful to preventing it from taking hold in some folks who catch it early enough.
It stands for Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy. There are 2 names for the disease now, CRPS-Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome being the other. Most people tend to use RSD interchangeably. I know I have mentioned it to people ...but I am guessing most people don't really know what it means. You may have heard Paula Abdul, of American Idol fame, mention that she suffers with it. She seems to be the most famous person we have who has said she has this disease from a cheerleading injury years before.

HOW I GOT IT: I was burdened with RSD after simple arthroscopic knee surgery for a meniscus tear. It is through no fault of the surgeon, but more a way that my own body reacted to the surgery. Most people heal in about 4-6 weeks with no issues. My healing after surgery was often going in the wrong direction, with swelling to the extreme, and redness and the inability to even have a sheet touch my leg at the time. I was in physical therapy and working on it several times a week only to have it continue to worsen. In January of 2007 I was diagnosed with RSD after my surgeon referred me to a pain specialist who made the final diagnosis, that I may have RSD for life. It can go into remission but no one knows how or what causes it to go into remission. Anyone who has this is constantly in prayer to have remission come upon them. It is a disease of the nervous system, that the body sets up a pain loop from the brain to the injured area, that never shuts off, even though the extremity may be healed from the surgery. The pain is not imagined pain. It is very real. Some people think because the brain is involved, that it is therefore "all in the head". This is not true...this actually causes physical things to happen to the affected areas causing the pain. There are times when I cannot even have fabric touch my leg or arm, it is that painful.
Below is an explanation of the disease taken from RSDSA(Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Syndrome Association) . Just click on the link if you would like further information or know of anyone who is also suffering from this disease.

DESCRIPTION, FACTS AND FICTION :
Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy is a debilitating progressive disease of the Autonomic Nervous System. It is a chronic multi-symptom condition which is often characterized by severe burning pain, pathological changes in bones and skin, swelling, diminished motor function, and extreme sensitivity to touch. It can occur in one, two, or sometimes all four extremities , and be in the face, shoulders, back, eyes and internal organs as well. RSD involves your nerves, skin, muscles, blood vessels and bones. Although it usually occurs after trauma (minor like a sprain or major like a car accident or stroke), infections, surgery, or repetitive motion disorder, it can sometimes occur without any apparent cause.
If diagnosed quickly and treated properly, RSD can go into remission. Periods of remission can last weeks, months or even years and often will continue until an additional injury or trauma to the body causes the RSD to become active again. If treatment is delayed, RSD can spread to the entire limb or other parts of one's body and the changes in the bone and muscles can become irreversible. Unfortunately RSD remains poorly understood and often times is misdiagnosed. This is why it is extremely important for all of us to learn as much about the disease as we can and to educate others, including our family members, doctors, media etc.
SYMPTOMS :
While not every person has all of the same symptoms, the major symptoms that most RSD'ers
have are:

1: Constant burning pain which is often described as having a hot poker being stuck into you. The pain is known to be out of proportion for the type of injury suffered. After the injury or trauma, the sympathetic nervous system seems to react abnormally and send incorrect messages throughout the body.
2: Inflammation while not always present, presents itself as pitting or non-pitting edema.
3: Skin changes which include, but are not limited to, temperature changes, skin or tissue atrophy, increased hair and nail growth or hair and nail loss, dryness, rashes, increased sweating, and an over sensitivity to touch.
4: Spasms in the muscles and or blood vessels, tremors and dystonia.
5: Diminished motor function and the eventual development of dystrophy and/or atrophy.
6: Bone changes
7: Emotional disturbances including insomnia, depression, concentration and short term memory difficulties.

GOOD DAYS VS BAD DAYS :
For many of us, one of the hardest things to adjust to is never knowing how much pain the day will bring. We can wake up feeling (and looking) fine but within a matter of hours find ourselves bedridden once again. Or we feel well enough to do some things one day (household chores, running errands, or even going out to socialize with friends or family) and as a result of having a "good" day, we are bedridden in pain for the next 2-4. The little chores which used to take us a short time to complete now take endless tiring hours as we often have to stop for breaks before we are done.
Our activities play a huge part on how we feel and we must learn to make changes in our lifestyles to accommodate this. We need to learn to avoid activities which make our pain flare. We need to learn to set our daily priorities, set realistic goals, and most importantly learn to pace ourselves and rest when needed.
We also need to take into consideration the outside forces which will affect the way we feel including noise, crowds, weather and barometric changes, temperature changes, etc.
As hard as it is, we must try to find new interests and hobbies which enable us enjoyment without taking too much of a toll on us. We need to try to keep as active, mentally as well as physically as we can.

My RSD is in my left leg, left arm and often my left eye twitches at various times through the day. I recently broke my baby toe on my right foot and I fear that the RSD is moving over there. It has remained purple for 2 weeks now and the pain is spreading now up the right side of my foot. Any new injuries can have the RSD move into that particular area, so we must be careful about treating new injuries as well. My skin has all ready begun changing on the left leg, hair loss, and shiny thin skin is on my leg. It often turns a light purple when I am in a flare up all the way from the thigh to the foot will change color.
I am on a mixture of heavy pain medications including lyrica, oxycontin and vicodins. I am grateful for the Lyrica, for it has truly helped me to have a more normal life. But on days when the rain and cold set in and the barometric pressure is high like today, you will still find me suffering, despite how much pain medications I take. I also have a new friend who just moved here from Philadelphia, who sadly also has RSD and has had it for 14 years. I am grateful to have someone to share the path with who truly understands.
There are many wonderful people out there....millions of us, suffering with this disease. Little is being done to understand it or treat it. We are often treated with medications that were created for other diseases. It is a baffling disease indeed. Thanks for taking the time to read this and understand why when I have a few bad days and can't post or create cards, you now know why. This smiley holds the orange ribbon for RSD.

At last....some cards! And meet my cute hubby...the cards are for him.

2008-04-28T12:19:00.003-04:00

This blog was first created to post cards, wasn't it? We all have times in our lives, when life surely gets in the way of the things we love to do and want to do. Hobbies take a back seat, to duties and health problems and friends who need us. But I am going to do my best to try to keep this blog moving along again. So back to the fun of creating and cards!

Last week was my darling hubby Brian's birthday, on the 24th. Isn't he a cutie? I think he is. ;o) People often ask him if he is a certain television star that is on the TV show "Grounded for Life" as well as some other shows and movies. The actor's name is Donal Logue and you can check him out by clicking on his name. He does look a bit like him and we always get a chuckle when some waitress asks him for the table near us, if he is that man. hee hee... He'll always be a star in my eyes. *swooooon*
His birthday was on the 24th, which was also the day Anna Wight's (Sweet&Sassy) baby cow was born! You can check out the glorious photos she took of her new little heifer here: Sweet & Sassy - Life on the Farm. I just thought it funny that he got to share his birthday with Anna's long awaited arrival of Dixie's baby cow.

We celebrated with my husband by taking him out to lunch with his Mom, Sister, Brother & Co-Worker and our sons too (because it was take a kid to work day too!). In the photo are L-R, my 13 yr. old Zane, me, my DH Brian, his Mother-Pearl, his brother-Lenny and his sister-Donna So he had a yummy lunch with family and friends. Uncle Lenny beat me to the check, so THANKS FOR LUNCH LENNY! Jim (his co-worker) took the picture. Shane, my 10 yr. old, is off flirting with a girl from his school in the parking lot. He won her a bunny playing the games inside. He's my little flirt! I will have to show him another time....when he's not so busy playing "Romeo".
My Mom took Brian and us out to dinner on Friday. THANKS FOR DINNER MOM!
My boys made him cards too. Shane's is sort of missing...it was a large piece of cardboard, hand colored and he had taped it to the door. I am sure it's here somewhere.
Zane however got into the cardstock and cutter and stickers and did a little creating himself. I like his eye for design. His card for Dad has clean and colorful look to it. He also took the time to write Daddy a poem. (I must admit to feeling a bit neglected and cheated in that regard because for my birthday I got NOTHING! LOL Shane made me a card, but Zane is Daddy's boy).
But I do want to share his art and poetry with you all as it was quite good!
First the card, on orange and green cardstock with cut rectangles in vibrant colors and he used alphabet stickers to say happy birthday. I love the clean simple layout and look of this card. I think he has a great eye for design and thinks outside the box!

Here is Zane's poem:

THANK YOU
I thank you for everything you do
Especially when it is just me and you
Thank you for playing catch and cleaning up our mess
You even prepare us for our tests.
But there is only 1 more thing I have to say
You're the best Dad in every way.

Isn't that sweet??

And here is my card for Brian...I hadn't made it when we went to lunch and so I let him pick the color he wanted. I was surprised when he said PURPLE! It's my favorite color, but I was just sort of shocked that he wanted a purple card. So I scooted on home, before he got home and created a purple masterpiece just for him!

This card is done on purple DCWV CS and DCWV DP, and purple mulberry paper. I trimmed the edges with my gold metallic calligraphy marker. The curly wired trim is a ribbon that has purple beads on it. I found it at Pier 1 Imports at an after Christmas sale for 15 cents a spool! I bought every one that they had. They were so fun and funky! The purple ribbon had gold edging (that led me to do my paper in those edges too). The image is from the Stampin' Up - Lovely As A Tree set and was stamped in elegant eggplant ink. There are gold brads in the corners and the trims on the corners were a rubbery sort of sticker from Dollar Tree's scrapbooking line. They were plain white and I colored them in with the same gold pen and purple permanent Bic markers. He just loved it!

Thanks for the prayers for Shelly & now a prayer for you....

2008-04-28T11:53:00.004-04:00

First off....let me thank you all who took the time to enter for my blog candy, by leaving such kind and thoughtful prayers for Shelly. I will be printing them out for her to take with her on her trip to travel to Mexico for a special treatment. Shelly is on my mind constantly and I can't tell you how much it means to know that you are all thinking of her and praying with me and sending in cards. The cards that have come in by the handfuls daily are a glorious testimony to the beautiful hearts of the women who post on Splitcoast Stampers. What wonderful, compassionate women you all are. I am so grateful for the day I discovered that site. It has literally changed my life. And getting to know all of you has been such a huge blessing to me. I consider you all friends and am grateful for these newfound friendships.
Give yourselves a hand for the wonderful compassionate women you all are, as I now say a prayer for you....

Heavenly Father,
Bless each woman who has taken the time to stop in the middle of their busy lives, to say a prayer for my dear friend Shelly. I thank you for letting me get to know these women by the cards they have sent and the prayers they have left here. They have richly blessed my life as well as Shelly's. I pray you will bless them and their families with good health, happy children, happy homes, peace, bliss and joy always. May they always have enough stamping supplies and room to create, so as to bless other's lives with their glorious talents and gifts. Amen.

Pretty Parrot Picks Prize Person!

2008-04-27T15:27:00.006-04:00

OK, I got a little carried away with those "P"s. LOL But you can tell by my name that I love BIRDS! Feathers in Feathers&Ink is most definitely for my birdies as well as calligraphy quills.
I had actually created a little video for you all to see my parrots actually picking our winner for the blog candy. I put all of your names on little slips of paper and folded them in half and put them in a box, then offered them to the birds to pull one name out. The cockatoo girls were the ones who did the picking. They are in the picture above. The one in the foreground is in need of a new home. Long story, but if you are interested or know anyone who is have them contact me!
When I have more time I will publish the videos to YouTube and you can see them there.
Mico (my umbrella cockatoo) and my favorite bird in the house was permitted to select our winner. You can thank Miss Mico Pie for choosing your winning slip!

She pulled out our winner and it's ~~~da da da daaaaaaaaaaa ~ LENA ~ SCS-Tackertwosome! CONGRATULATIONS MISS LENA!!!

Your prize will be mailed tomorrow, as it is in the box all ready. While I was cleaning up my office, I put it all in there after photographing it. Just email me your address and I will get it out to you.
Enjoy all the goodies. We may even throw in a feather or two (you can use them on cards!)
CONGRATULATIONS!