Style Bard

Top 100 Fashion Blog

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 15:08:17 PDT

Didja hear? Style Bard Shoes is on the StyleClone Top 100 Fashion Blog list!

I am very humbled and flattered to be included with some of my own favorite fashion reads, such as Coutorture, Fashionologie, Go Fug Yourself, Manolo's Shoe Blog and Style Bubble.

For the complete list, follow the link.

The Top Tunic Dress (TTD) by Roland Mouret

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 11:28:00 PDT

I'll be the first to admit that I never swooned over the Galaxy dress. My fascination with Roland Mouret has been limited to his sudden explosion onto the scene, his brooding eyes and that thick, charming accent. But now my interest is definitely piqued over Mouret's new TTD garment. More and more, designers plunge into the future by creating versatile garments that can be modified, recycled and reimagined with time. It's evident that fashion houses must consider the economically minded consumer in coming years, and speaking as one of them, I must say that a very versatile garment (or three pieces, really) speaks more to me than does a simple dress than can be worn one way to a limited number of occasions. Learn more about the TTD in the latest Notes Weekly at Net-a-Porter.com, and be sure to let me know what you think!

New OMNY Post!

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 09:07:16 PDT

Ever get stuck at a swanky party wearing a t-shirt and jeans? The Style Bard has.

Check out the story at One More New Yorker.

LOL Spam

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 13:30:00 PDT

Here's the latest Top 20 Titles from Style Bard's Spambox.

If you squint, they kind of tell a story!

1. Hi
2. Do I know you?
3. Where will you go tonight?
4. Get ready to improve your night life.
5. I'm going to show you this, but keep it secret!
6. He wants an audience
7. And he, who is so kind and keen
8. Nail her like a youngster.
9. Wanna try?
10. Help needed
11. Join us at 8
12. we will make you happy;
13. For everybody in here
14. Where is those place?
15. Photos of the place
16. You're officially "in" now!
17. Check our new members
18. Call me back please.
19. You're a moron.
20. Aloha

I think it's the story of a poor, naive couple who goes to Hawaii on their honeymoon and are lured into joining a smutty sex scandal. But maybe that's just me.

Feel free to send me some of your better titles and I'll post them next time!

Havaianas Flip-Flops Review

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 18:15:22 PDT

Are you stuck in a flip-flop rut? I was; I always bought the same boring monochrome pair of Old Navy flip-flops year after year.

And then this year I decided to try Havianas, a very popular brand of Brazilian women's sandals.

Head over to SBS to check out the comparison between the two sandals, and to read the full review.

New OMNY Post!

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Mon, 29 Jun 2009 10:04:25 PDT

The latest post is now live at One More New Yorker. It's called All NYC Girls Look the Same. Enjoy!

Product Review ~MUD Towelettes~

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 13:44:04 PDT

The Make-Up Designory (MUD), a renowned beauty school based in L.A. and NYC, has just released a new product: make-up removing towelettes. They sent me over a package to review, so here's the skinny on the latest addition to my arsenal of beauty tools.

Packaging: The MUD Make-Up Remover Towelettes are packaged in a packet-type container with a resealable slot for depositing fresh wipes; this seal also locks in moisture. At first I was doubtful about this arrangement, because I prefer a more structure package (preferably something tiny I can keep in the medicine cabinet, or something attractive I can keep out on the bathroom vanity). However, when I learned that these are being advertised for space conservation and travel use--"simply toss [into your] carry on, gym bag, purse or work tote"--I realized that it's the perfect design.

Quality: The MUD towelettes do a great job of removing make-up from the face and neck. I particularly like that they are not standard wipes, but rather like an oversized hanky damp with cleanser that provide enough acreage to give your whole face a good scrub without running out of towel. One takes care of the job, and you're done. The first time I used these, I tried using the towelette by itself (it seems to suggest that you can use them in lieu of washing your face), but I personally thought that while my face was clear of make-up (even tricky mascara) there was too much residue from the towelette still on my face. This may be a matter of sensitivity, but I gave my face a quick wash afterward.

After more experience, here's how I would suggest using them:

1) Wash your face with your usual soap (mine is Clean & Clear Foaming Facial Cleanser).
2) Use a MUD towelette to remove any excess make-up.
3) Splash water on your face to remove an excess residue from towelettes.

After I wash my face, I typically use make-up remover or astringent to remove remaining traces of make-up, then follow with a toner or moisturizer. MUD towelettes are designed to leave your face feeling fresh and balanced, so you can skip the last step.

Pricing: Suggested retail value is 40 wipes for $18, which equals roughly $2.50 per week for me. I would invest in the towelettes again for travel purposes, but not everyday use.

If you're interested in trying them yourself, you can check them out at the Make-Up Designory shop, under "Skincare."

Be sure to let me know what you think!

New (York City) Blog!

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 22:34:02 PDT

Hey guys! Exciting news! The Style Bard will now be writing as an Insider for the UK-based website, T5M.com! Check out my first post:

Ok - I have to admit. I never really saw myself living in New York City.

Sure, everyone always said I’d grow up and become a city girl with a swanky apartment and a splendid writing career (right). But after hopping from Florida to Boston to Florida to Cambridge to New Paltz (where? - exactly) to Florida again, I decided that I needed to stop my shenanigans and pick a place of residence, already. Even my cat felt like she was constantly living out of a suitcase, and I was beginning to annoy USPS.

LOL Spam

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 13:09:00 PDT

Here are 20 more hilarious subject lines from my spam inbox:

1. You're a jerk
2. Cheap drugs.

(SB: I like the forthrightness. And the use of punctuation.)

3. Step by step to her chair.
4. What now?
5. Your love is worthy to receive what she wants. Give it it!

(SB: Your love is worthy to be called an it!)

6. We thought something's wrong.
7. Ready to go with us?
8. Could you use $1060 a Month or even a weekly?
9. NICE TO MEET YOU
10. Say a few words here

(SB: This one came straight from the email blast template form, no doubt! You're supposed to change the text prompts, guys. Just a head's up.)

11. Saw that girl anywhere?
12. Hey, pal. Damn you
13. You upset me.
14. Correcting your mistake
15. And when the sun went down
16. Sir, reply, sir
17. Rode the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo.
18. All past efforts at world peace have failed...
19. Reply or get killed!
20. That is your life

Feel free to email me some of yours and I'll include them in the next round! But, uhm, since your comments are likely to end up in spam, please try to include a relevant subject line so that they don't get deleted. I know, I know, the irony.

Tie Bar Helps Men Coordinate Outfits

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 15:52:14 PDT

I remember being less than 5 years old, standing in my father's bedroom in the morning and helping him pick out ties to go with his suits. Whether he was just heading into the office, or about to go to court, he always valued my input and instincts. It's really sad when a grown man thinks that a preschooler has a better fashion sense than he does. Men shouldn't doubt their own instincts quite so much. But here I am, 20 years later, and the last time I saw my dad he still asked me which tie he should wear to dinner. So I guess things never do change. (Although I do like to consider myself a little more credible in the fashion department nowadays!)

But male haplessness is soon to be a thing of the past (when it comes to ties, anyhow). The Tie Bar website has launched a new interface which actually helps guys match their tie to their suit without the help of their wives or daughters. Men are able to "try on" ties by picking a shirt and suit jacket color, and then placing ties against the fabric on-screen to see what works and what doesn't. If men still don't trust their own judgment, Tie Bar suggests ties based on your suit jacket. So if you select 'Navy Suit' for instance, the menu will immediately show only the silk ties which coordinate with a navy blue background. (It took me about 30 seconds to put together the combination shown above, which looks exactly like something my dad would wear back in the day.)

Another reason this works is because unlike other garments, ties are not an accessory you need to try on, so once you know how it'll look, it's easy to shop online. After browsing by suit color, you can double-check your combo by adding a shirt in the "try-on" interface before checking out with your complete order. I think it's a great idea! It's straightforward and practical, which are the two traits guys want when they're forced to go shopping. Tie Bar was created in 2004 by former lawyers (just like my dad!) Greg and Gina Shugar. They wanted to create a way for men to buy affordable accessories that still helped them look sharp every day; now they aim to help men shop and dress with ease and confidence as well.

My dad doesn't wear ties to work anymore. But if yours does, forget the nonsense about a tie being a cliche Father's Day gift. A tie is a wonderful gift for those who wear them, and whose co-workers may be sick of seeing them in the same outfits time and again. But you know what would make an even better gift? Sitting down with dad and showing him how he can use Tie Bar to create stylish new combos all by himself. My dad always appreciates when I take a deep breath and sit down with him to show him how to do newfangled interweb thingys, so I imagine that your dad will appreciate the time and thought, too. Besides, if you give a man a fish he eats for a day, if you show a man to fish...

Then again, since every tie is only $15 and 100% silk, why not throw a tie or two into the gift bag as well? He can put the outfit together and you can pay at check-out. This is also a great last-minute gift idea, since it won't take much forethought and it won't need to be shipped in advance.

Whatever you do with dad this Sunday, I hope you cherish the time spent with your family. Both my father and step-father are far away this weekend, so I envy you your quality time. Give an extra hug for me and all those who can't be with their dads this weekend. Happy Father's Day!

Scary Mascara - Three Product Reviews

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 04:02:00 PDT

As a lifelong Maybelline Great Lash user, I have finally begun to consider updating my product by finding the perfect mascara for a night out. I recently received two mascaras from HSN.com. The first is IMAN Global Chic Signature Gold Long & Lush Mascara Duo in Black Caviar (it's also available in Cognac Brown), and the second is Global Goddess Exotic Eyes Lash-Building Mascara in Blackest Black.

Let's talk about IMAN, and start with internet reviews. You know it's never good when a mascara review contains the words "raccoon eyes." But that was just the beginning of a host of poor reviews for the IMAN product; many conclude with the phrase, "...which is why I sent it back" and a terse "skip this product" warning. As it turns out, I concur. But I have a quick little story that provides the background on why:

The IMAN mascara comes in a very beautiful sleek package, I have to give it that, though I'm a bit of a magpie, and good packaging gets me every time. It has two ends with two different brush types: one for lengthening, and one for thickening. Going out to my friend's house for a casual poker night, I chose what I believed was the lengthening mascara (the ends aren't marked) because I thought there was no need to lay it on thick just to go to someone's apartment. It applied well and looked good on. At first. As I was walking to the apartment from the subway, it began to rain. You all know where this is going. I knew that I was soaked from head to toe when I finally arrived (after getting lost, of course) and when I showed up, I introduced myself to a few new acquaintances before going into the bathroom with a towel to dry off and freshen up. One look in the mirror, and I was hysterically laughing. Little did I know that as I entered the apartment to greet new friends, my face was covered in mascara smudges, starting with two giant dark ovals around my eyes. 'Raccoon' doesn't even begin to cover it. Think Panda. Think Hamburglar. Anyway, because we're talking about a boy's apartment, there was only handsoap and water to be found, so it actually took some vigorous rubbing to get the worst off. When I got home to take off the rest, it still took several washes to completely cleanse my face. Thankfully, the guys were a good sport about my first impression, and the night improved from there. But I never plan to wear the IMAN again (at least, not for long periods of time); and the idea of applying even more at once with the thickening end of the brush just terrifies me.

As for the Global Goddess mascara, though the sales website claims that the product creates "bold, beautiful lashes for sultry seduction" (they like their alliteration), I found it to actually be a perfect everyday mascara. I thought it went on well and separated my lashes nicely (although, I will admit, I am still learning how to apply mascara with a curved brush)(apparently there's a steep learning curve---get it?). Because it was a daytime look, I only applied it once, and only to my top lashes. I thought it stayed in place well and provided a flattering look for many hours.

When it came time to wash it off, I did need more than soap and water, and it made a great big mess under my eyes. Fortunately, along with the original order of two mascaras, I also received Talika Lash Conditioning Cleanser, an oil-free makeup remover which can be applied to a cotton swab and used to remove tricky eye makeup--without needing a finishing rinse afterward. I love it because I usually keep makeup removers in the bathroom so that I can wash them off my face, but I keep this one by my bed so it's just a quick swipe before I go to sleep.

All in all, I do recommend the Global Goddess over the IMAN mascara, but the truth is that I would never spend upwards of $20 to replace either product. The cleanser, however, I would buy in a heartbeat. It's a steal at $24.00, and I know it sounds pricey, but the tube is huge and will last you forever--plus, it's not just a soap, it's also a lash conditioner(not that I'm sure I would notice the difference in my eyelashes). Alas, my hunt for the perfect mascara continues. Got any suggestions?

LOL Spam

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 13:08:03 PDT

Here's another installment of weird, funny, eye-roll-worthy subject lines from my spam inbox (all [sic] of course). I particularly like how they become increasingly volatile about some answer I haven't given. And that I'm apparently very ambiguous about either my gender or sexual orientation. Oh, well; enjoy!

1. Strains in relationship?
2. Asking you last time!
3. bovines
4. Your wife take deep
5. Her emotion will go off-scale!
6. pears
7. Need m-f-ing answer!
8. Mr., I need to know now
9. Become a sophisticated perfume? She'll adore your talent
10. Literally become a monster snake in my pants

(SB: "Literally.")

11. Let women excite you more
12. Turbines for your meat jet
13. Be so kind as to read this please
14. Monsters
15. I really like you.
16. Tom asked about you
17. dude, what's up?
18. Please
19. Tell me, what's this?
20. Our price: $

(SB: Sold!)

I think I need to make like, a t-shirt that's just a series of the one-word subject lines: 'Bovines, Pears, Monsters, Please...' Man. Now I really want that shirt. It's so damn irrelevant!

Feel free to share some of your funny spam messages with me in the comments, or shoot me an email and I'll publish them in the next round of LOL Spam.

50 Books - The Conclusion

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 13:03:14 PDT

This year, I'm endeavoring to read 50 books in a year. I began in June of 2008, and as it's just a few weeks short of being June, 2009 we can all see that I've fallen woefully short.

That kind of bums me out, actually. For the first few months, I really had it in the bag. My pace was perfect. And then NaNoWriMo happened. And then the holidays. And then I traveled for two weeks. In between all of that, I was probably reading TV Guide, Glamour, Vogue, Reader's Digest, and maybe some sections of the newspaper. Oh yeah--and BLOGS. Yeesh. So that's where all of my reading time goes. Now that I'm ready to update again, I'm in the middle of the few books (more on that later) but nowhere near 50 books. Know what that means? Gotta start all over again in two weeks. For now, here's the updated list:

1) The Bostonians, Henry James
2) A Drink Before the War, Dennis Lehane
3) Darkness, Take My Hand, Dennis Lehane
4) Sacred, Dennis Lehane
5) Gone, Baby, Gone, Dennis Lehane
6) Prayers for Rain, Dennis Lehane
7) Picture of Dorian Gray, Oscar Wilde
8) The Day I Ate Whatever I Wanted, Elizabeth Berg
9) The Apprentice, Tess Gerritsen
10) Skin Deep, Gary Braver
11) Proof: A Play, David Auburn
12) The Exonerated, Jessica Blank
13) All My Sons, Arthur Miller
14) Black Sunday, Thomas Harris
15) Just One Look, Harlan Coben - I'm actually surprised to learn that this guy's kind of a well-known name in the thriller genre, because I've never picked up anything by him before. If you're familiar, I'd compare him to Steve Martini--you know, the easy-to-read beach book sort of thing. Just One Look is about a woman who finds a mysterious photo of her husband tucked into her recently developed pack of photos (ah, the days before digital cameras) and shows it to her husband, and he freaks out and runs away. So she begins to investigate, of course. And begins uncovering a lot of things about her own past, things which aren't always what they seem...yada, yada. I actually thought that the ending was pretty awesome with its reveals, it just took a lot of plodding around and turning corners to get there. I wasn't really sure if I cared about the heroine, and of course, there are a bunch of times that you're just like WHY? WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT? but then again, there were some decent false leads and interesting characterizations, too. Anyway, if you want a decent easy read, check out this book and probably anything else by Coben. You can probably read this in like, a day.
16) Invasion (1997), Robin Cook

AND

17) Shock (2001), Robin Cook

First of all, did you know that 'Robin Cook' is also a British politician? Well, now you do. Second of all, the thing with Robin Cook is that he is soooo hit-or-miss that I usually dread starting one of his novels. It takes about 2/3 of the book before I realize if it's any good or not, and by then I just have to finish it. And, if you've got a shelf of Cook's books in your house as I do, sometimes you can get 1/3 into them and then remember that you've read them before (or maybe you did; it's so hard to tell). If you read more than one at a time (as I did), the pacing and characterizations kind of blur together and wear on you. I think that Cook's strengths are in the science, plotting and social messages, but they lack individuality. In fact, if you've been reading his works for the past 30 years since he started publishing, I dare you to look at a list of his titles and correctly match the plots with the titles, describe what any of the books are about or name memorable traits about the protagonists. Try it!

Anyway, I read these two back-to-back before promptly burning out on Cook's writing. One was about aliens taking over the Earth, but I didn't really care for any of the characters and the premise wasn't exactly new. The other was about two reeeeeally dumb and frustrating girls who try to make money by selling their eggs and then start investigating the clinic for somewhat ambiguous reasons. Seriously, they're risking their lives without going to the authorities for reasons like they just have to know! Or: let's just gather more evidence to CONVINCE the authorities! Whatever. Shut up, heroines. I liked a few of the twists and turns of both novels, but the others were easy to spot. I do recall that I had to keep re-reading physical descriptions, because I just couldn't always picture buildings, rooms, people, landscapes or what-have-you. I guess that's another problem of Cook's writing. Sigh, anyway...I'm sure I'll finish all of his books one day--especially since I have a handful left on the shelf, and they're always like $.25 at thrift stores and libraries--but I'll need big breaks in between each novel, for sure.

So yeah, seriously, sadly, I think that's all I've finished so far. Meanwhile, I'm in the middle of a Ray Bradbury novel, a nonficton book about economics, a nonfiction book about blogging and this month's Glamour. The trick is to finish all of those by June and then...well, I'll have completed 20 books in a year. SO SAD. But I didn't quit, and now I'm prepared to hit it again with renewed vigor. I actually bought eight new books lately, not including the three I mentioned, so I have plenty of ammo and I'm ready to go.

Good Buys at Goodwill

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Fri, 15 May 2009 15:25:00 PDT

Did anyone see the episode of Real Housewives of New York where (Countess?) LuAnn de Leseppe's daughter tells her mom that she's never heard of Goodwill? I wish I could find a clip of that for you, because it's truly a priceless gem.

Well anyway, the other day my car broke down across the street from a Goodwill store. As I waited nearly an hour for the mechanic to show up (in the Florida heat no less) I had plenty of time to think about how my one remaining denim skirt had recently broke its zipper, and decided that, since I was going out of town that weekend, I should really pick up a new denim skirt and why not check out what Goodwill had to offer?

You all probably know where this tale is heading, but after my car was fixed (new battery, oil change, tire rotation, new wipers--$$$--SIGH) I stopped by Goodwill to try on skirts. I walked out with the following:

Two t-shirts, a denim skirt, a brown peasant skirt, a jersey skirt, a military-style bolero jacket, a knit cotton shrug, and a pair of black pumps. Oh! Plus, three books not pictured here.

Total cost? $35.00 The shoes? $4.50

And to make matters better, half the clothes had original price tags still attached, including the shoes.

You just can't knock Goodwill, especially in these dire economic times. And luckily, a new one just opened up much closer to my house!

Metropolitan Museum Costume Gala

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Sun, 10 May 2009 05:23:00 PDT

Footage from the Metropolitan Museum of Art's Costume Institute Gala
Monday, May 4th, 2009

(thanks to WWD.com)

Exclusive Fashion Club Membership for Style Bard Readers!

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Fri, 08 May 2009 14:04:08 PDT

Hey guys! I'm really excited to let you know about an exclusive membership opportunity that's currently available to you just for being Style Bard readers. This has been in the works for over a month, so I'm happy to finally spill the beans about it. Here's the deal:

Luxe Club One is a members-only site that grants fashion-savvy users access to special online deals, promotions and sample sales--members not only hear about these offers first, but they're often the only people allowed to take advantage of these special deals. For example, right now members of Luxe Club One can take advantage of 80% off the S/S Collection at Juliette Longuet by using a code that's only available through the LC1 website.

A year-long membership typically costs $99, while a VIP membership costs $399. But Style Bard readers are (for a limited time) able to join as VIP members for free for an entire year by signing up here:

http://www.luxeclubone.com/join/jc/stylebard

Here's the official info about Luxe Club One:

Luxe Club One is an online, members only club for affluent fashion lovers. They negotiate special offers with luxury and contemporary brands and inform their members via an easy-to-scan email. While other clubs sell you last season’s inventory, Luxe Club One only brings you offers on fashion items that are currently on the brand’s website!

(BTW, Style Bard is receiving no monetary compensation for posting this information; this is not a paid advertisement. I've only made this offer available so that my readers can take advantage of a remarkable opportunity. Go check it out now! I'm already a member and I'm eager to hear what you think about the Luxe Club One specials and services.)

Product Review ~Clinique's Even Better Makeup SPF 15~

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Tue, 05 May 2009 10:23:22 PDT

Sigh. Would that I could tell you specifically why this makeup failed so critically when I tried the sample packet that came tucked inside my Glamour magazine last month. But I lack the scientific knowledge to clearly articulate why this formula--which claims to 'erase the need for makeup'--failed me so utterly.

Here's the story. About to run out to a very casual sports bar by my house, I didn't feel like getting out of the shower and putting on a full mask of makeup. But, if you know anything about the Style Bard, she's not going to even the most dimly-lit hole-in-the-wall without something on her face. That's when I remembered that my latest Glamour offered a sample of Clinique's newest liquid makeup (concealer? foundation?) that supposedly shows 'improved clarity, a more even skin tone, [and] visibly diminished age spots' with one layer of application. So I used the whole sample-size packet and carefully distributed it evenly over my face and neck with my fingertips (since the final packaging doesn't seem to come with an applicator, I assume this is how it would be put on). At first glance, all went well. The 'Neutral' color that came in the sample (ostensibly the most ubiquitous skin color) matched me well enough, and my complexion did seem smooth and monochromatic. I thought I would wear this (and maybe some lip gloss) out and see how it performed.

At the restaurant itself, I forgot to check on the progress, but as soon as I got home I went to take a look. Oh my goodness! It must have been only two hours since I applied the makeup, and this stuff had suctioned itself to every pore and wrinkle in my 20-something face and made me look about 50 years old. I looked like the bad end of a failed botox experiment, or a Theatre major's first trial with aging makeup, or the witch-queen at the end of Snow White. Clinique's Even Better Makeup SPF 15 dried against my skin like cake makeup and decided to point out every little flaw on my face. After two hours.

If you can't tell already, I was absolutely aghast that I'd been seen in public like that. I washed the stuff off my face immediately, and I will remember to never try it again. It not only doesn't do anything that it promises to do to make you more beautiful, it actually makes you look older and uglier.

I have to say, if this is the even better formula...I'm just glad I never put a drop of the even worse stuff on my face.

To my readers, I strongly recommend avoiding any version of Clinique's "skin-improving" Even Better Makeup SPF 15.

LOL Spam

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 18:26:14 PDT

I've always been a fan of spam. No, not the canned meat-like product (ick!) but rather spam email. Running two blogs with a public email address, I get a fair share of it in my spambox every day. But before I click 'Delete All' I like to browse through the subject lines. Whether perverse, solicitative, absurd or just poorly spelled, they often give me a good giggle.

The daily spam read-through has always been a guilty pleasure of mine, and now I want to share it with you. After all, what is there to life if we can't use our resources to bring happiness and spam into the lives of others? So without further ado, here's a first installment of LOL Spam (don't worry, it's safe for work)(and all subject lines are [sic]):

1. Size is Always Matter
[SB: This one blows my mind a little. Newton never saw it coming!]
2. Jack looks for you for a week!
3. I worry about you..
[SB: For some reason, this one makes me a little sad. I think it's the unfinished ellipses. What do you think happened to the sender midway? Now -I'm- worried. Vicious cycle!]
4. Nothing matters except a big dong
5. Give your bomb longer timer
6. No Impotence
7. Your love torch wont blow out
8. Scientists found pervert genes
9. How to be Irressistible to Women - Sexually
10. How to Eliminate All Your Yacht or Boat Expenses NOW
[SB: Whew, I was wondering how I'd pay for my yacht.]
11. This crysis never ends
12. Mom called police, where were you?
13. Make your own gun of pleasure
14. Is Linda here?
15. Outrageous games of yuppie
[SB: Polo? Stock trading? Dog breeding?]
16. CIA prisons' photos!
17. Hideous surgery's victims
18. Most brutal children
19. Get better in making it with her
20. Answer. This. Letter!

Enjoyable? You betcha. Feel free to email me any great lines from your own spambox, and I'll post them next time.

Free Jewelry by Peggy Li Winner -- Update

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 00:25:15 PDT

Hey guys! The winner of the Peggy Li Jewelry giveaway contacted me to let me know she received her prize. I wanted to share her email with you (with her permission, of course):

Hi! I just wanted to let you know I love the Peggy Li necklace! It came in time for me to wear out with my husband on our anniversary- it was perfect! Thanks again for picking me!

MJ

You're welcome, MJ!

Enjoy your beautiful quartz necklace, handmade by Peggy Li.

World Blog Archive - Update

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Sun, 05 Apr 2009 13:22:45 PDT

Since my last post, World Blog Archive has personally contacted me to inform me that the terms have been changed. That's pretty accommodating! Here are the old terms:

However, by posting your Content through the Service you automatically grant WorldBlogArchive a royalty-free, perpetual, irrevocable, non-exclusive worldwide license to (i) use, publish, translate, adapt, distribute, perform, and display the Content alone or as part of other works in any form, media, or technology whether now known or later developed, and to (ii) freely and fully sublicense such rights through single or multiple tiers of sublicensees.

Here are the new terms:

However, by posting your Content through the Service you automatically grant WorldBlogArchive a royalty-free, good until termination, non-exclusive worldwide license to use, publish, translate, adapt, distribute, perform, and display the Content alone or as part of other works in any form, media, or technology whether now known or later developed.

Greg (who seems to be running things over there) is very receptive, open to communication and responds to inquiries in a timely manner. He even left me and my readers a comment on the last post, addressing my concerns--which means he takes the time to follow inbound links and read what people have to say (hi, Greg!). That's very respectable and thorough. So if you're thinking about publishing through them, but have some questions or reservations, I highly recommend shooting him at email at greg(a)worldblogarchive.com.

Glam Network Awards

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 11:53:03 PDT

Hey guys, it's that time again! Please show some love and support my meager efforts here at Style Bard by voting for me at the Glam Network Awards in the category of Fashion. You can vote once per day through April 13th, 2009. Just click on the link below to go to the voting page. Thank you! <3 SB

PhotoDally

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 13:47:59 PDT

For the record? When Facebook can't load a photo and it gives you this:

It is called a "photodally" ... as if the picture is just dallying, taking it's damn sweet time and smelling the daisies along the side of a 6-lane highway.

Those three fluctuating blue bars are the bane of Facebook. There's no sense of progress. There's no explanation. There's no estimate of how long you'll be waiting for the page to load. It just tells you, quite stoically: "You are not frozen. You are not frozen. You Are. Not. Frozen." (Even though it's essentially the same thing.) You click forward--and then back, aha!--but no, it has outsmarted you. It's still dallying. And dallying. And dallying.

And you just know it's the exact picture you came here to see, the one where all your friends are tagged, you look super hot, it's labeled with a pithy caption, and a slew of in-joke commentary is waiting to be read underneath. But it just...won't...GRR...open!

I think the photodally is a depiction of what the inside of Lennie Small's head looks like when he's confronted with a non yes-or-no question.

So: photodally. Don't ask me why, it's just called that. And I thought you should know, so we're all on the same page when we're lamenting and filing grievances. You're welcome.

P.S. I tried to get it to happen within an album, where it most frequently occurs. But this one time I could go through every album without a dally. What the hell? Because I was looking for it, of course. Sigh. You win, Facebook.

I'll update with that pic the next time I get one. Or if one of you encounters it before I do, feel free to send the screen pic my way. Thanks!

Style Bard Faves

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 21:31:17 PDT

"Style Bard Faves" is a term I coined (heh, I just typed "coin I termed") over at Style Bard Shoes to denote my picks for the best buy within a selection of on-sale shoes. Now I'm gonna use it to tell you about my top five favorites in a number of fashion-related categories. "Style Bard Faves" will be a 5-part series running every Wednesday starting today, on the third anniversary of Style Bard.

First up: (what else?) shoes. I've been writing about shoes on an almost-daily basis at Style Bard Shoes for almost two years, since March 2007. That's 756 shoes in 730 days! Naturally, it's a little hard to pick out a selection of five favorites (and I have maternal guilt about all the hundreds I had to overlook). Yet, here they are:

5) The fourth runner-up out of the five favorite shoes I've come across in the past three years is actually the hardest to choose. Picking out your favorites is easy, but narrowing down the last one to make the cut is tricky. Should I choose another pair of whimsical knee-high boots? Boots are my favorite style of shoe. Should I feature something with a zipper? Style Bard readers know that I'm a sucker for some zipper detailing on a shoe. How about the quintessential Jimmy Choo mid-heel black patent slingbacks, which every girl needs in her shoe armoire? But no. Finally I decided that I needed to choose a flashy, bright, dress-up shoe, the likes of which I'll never be able to buy in real life--something to add balance to the dark, gothic, S&M, romantic shoes I tend to favor. And that's the Swarovski-coated 'Gilda' pump by Gina shoes, a heel which stands out among all other shoes and demands attention. What I wouldn't give to see these in the light of a bright summer day! (Other than the $1,215.00 it would take to make that happen.) At heart, I am a magpie, and I think these shiny shoes deserve a place in my top five faves:

4) I've gotta tell you, I would wear the hell out of these 'Motorcycle Boots' by Tory Burch. I love the hardware, love the glam, love the height and wish like hell I could justify the pricetag. But alas, these gems like so many others just got away from me. They also come in a very similar version with a zipper up the front (swoon), but these are slightly more sexy to me because, in case you didn't know, the Style Bard loves some good motorcycle chic and military authority in her shoes almost as much as a zipper! In the perfect world, I'd have both boots, but this list can only include one:

3) O, 'Frisoni' by Vivre. Every time I lay eyes upon you, I only want you more. I wish I had the nerve several years ago to buy you, even though I'm sure your pricetag was exorbitant and I would have had to drop out of school and move into a box. But oh, what a fabulous pair of shoes I would wear in my cardboard box home under the freeway. You would keep me warm at night with the fiery heat of red velvet, dry the tears from my eyes with the glimmering sight of gold stiletto, and soothe my empty stomach with the raindrops that would collect in your curvaceous black patent heel... O, 'Frison' by Vivre. If I only were as brave as you are beautiful:

2) Coming in at second place, or first runner-up, are a pair I actually own. That counts, right? I bought these Irregular Choice booties from Schuh in London in early 2006, which was waaaaaay before booties became a big-time trend. I absolutely fell in love with them, had to have them, and circled them like a shark until the salesperson came to help me (like someone would steal the display shoe and they wouldn't have any more in the back right?). Then in my near-drooling tizzy, I asked for a size 9. The sales guy stared at my feet for a long moment and said very slowly, "We...don't...carry...size... -hem- 9 ...here." Then I blushed and nervously giggled or hiccuped or something and said, "Oops! 9 American! 9 American! Sorry!" And I actually walked out with a much more reasonable size 7UK. To date, Irregular Choice remains my favorite shoe brand, these continue to be the most expensive pair of shoes I own, and they are absolutely my favorites:

1) But my number one favorite shoe of all time is the 'Arunium' by Manolo Blahnik. I would pretty much trade my firstborn for these heel-less beauties; I might even trade all the rest of my shoes for them (gasp!). If they're even available these days they would retail for an impossible $6,000.00. These are the shoes I will always covet:

Check back next Wednesday for another round of "Style Bard Faves" with a new fashionable topic.

Three Years and Counting

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Wed, 18 Mar 2009 19:00:11 PDT

Happy Anniversary, Style Bard!

Today this blog turns three years old. There's no way to avoid this cliche: it does literally feel like just yesterday that I was sitting at my work-study job in college, bored to tears, making $7 an hour, and thinking: I should stop emailing my mother and sisters every day about what fashions I love or hate and just put it in a blog instead.

At the time, I already read a bunch of daily fashion blogs (some of my favorite reads such as Kristen at Beauty Addict, Annie at Blogdorf Goodman and Danielle at Final Fashion were immeasurably helpful and welcoming when I joined the world of blogging). And whenever I was bored at work I liked to peruse the sale pages of shopping sites to pick out my faves, much like virtually circling your favorite items in a mail catalog (which is ironic, since back in those days I could never afford to buy clothes at all so I might as well have looked at the full-price stuff). So it was a pretty easy transition to start my own blog. I never really had a major plan for this space. Just to collect my thoughts on fashion and share with the world the must-have pieces that I loved, wanted and needed. Although, I have noticed over the years that I love to write about shopping more than fashion. I love to write about sales and deals and finds. I think, going forward, I need to be a little less scattered about Style Bard and truly embrace my own theme. I remember about a year ago I read an article about American fashion icon Ralph Lauren, in which he stated something along the lines of not loving fashion, but rather loving clothes. That's how I feel about it. I don't love fashion per se (which is why you don't see runway or red carpet pics splashed all over the place on my blogs), but I do love shopping and style.

Of course, over at Style Bard Shoes, which I started approximately one year after I launched Style Bard, it's all about shoe sales and shoe shopping. The story behind SBS is that I was getting paid to freelance as a fashion specialist at another website that is now defunct (not my fault; I swear!) and they gave me permission to re-post my blogs on my own site. Of course, I was writing 5-8 blogs for them per week, so I thought that would really overpower Style Bard. So I started up a sister-site to post all of my shoe findings. Over the years I broke from the format that I was using at the freelance job, and have found my own voice and style with which to write about shoes. I love how familiar I am with the websites I frequent, such as Shopbop, Macy's, 6PM, Piperlime, Victoria's Secret, Shoebuy, OnlineShoes, Zappos, Bluefly, etc... I can always tell when they get new products, or when a shoe from a few weeks ago is now seriously on sale. I really enjoy combing through site after site and page after page of shoes to find the best deals and the best angles about which to write.

A lot of people assume I write these blogs for the money. To be quite candid, there's not too much of that coming in. I'm not one of those super big sites (yet) and I don't always do the smartest things to make the most money. For example, I write reviews for free, I work with affiliates on a quid-pro-quo unremunerative basis, and while I sometimes receive a commission from ad clicks or shoe sales, what I actually make per month from both my blogs combined is less than what I charge for one---one!---blog post in my real life as a freelance blogger/web content writer/SEO writer. And I work on my blogs like it's another part-time job, when it ain't paying like one. In short: I don't do it for the money. I do it because I love it. And I'm really not sure how someone could regularly blog two blogs (don't you love that it's a verb and a noun?) for three years unless they loved to. It's a big passion of mine, a big commitment, and I am thankful to all of my readers--because honestly, I'd just be talking to myself if it weren't for you guys.

So, I'm about to post "Style Bard Faves," a series about my favorite beauty products, jewelry items, shoes, designers, etc. which will continue every Wednesday alongside the 5-week Shoe Psyche/Win Free Shoes from Shoebuy results. Check back in a few minutes, and "Style Bard Faves" should be up. Or, you know, keep hitting refresh. I could use the traffic! Want to click some ads, too? It would be a wonderful anniversary present! ;D

Head over to Style Bard Shoes for the Second Annual St. Patrick's Day Green Shoe Week and the results of the Free Shoe Giveaway sponsored by Shoebuy (which is also the kick-off to five consecutive Wednesdays of Shoe Psyche, the new feature at SBS).

Thanks so much for reading! Y'all have been making it worthwhile for three years and counting.
~SB

Weekly Updates for SB and SBS

stylebard@gmail.com (The Style Bard) — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 23:25:37 PDT

Happy Saint Patrick's Day!

In honor of St. Paddy's, we're running the second annual Green Shoe Week at Style Bard Shoes.

Plus, today is the last day to enter to win free shoes from Shoebuy so head over and participate today! The grand prize winner will be announced tomorrow, with four follow-up winners announced every Wednesday hereafter in special new Shoe Psyche posts.

It's also one day until Style Bard's Third Anniversary, so check back tomorrow for a round-up of favorites in beauty and fashion.

Style Bard

Top 100 Fashion Blog

The Top Tunic Dress (TTD) by Roland Mouret

New OMNY Post!

LOL Spam

Havaianas Flip-Flops Review

New OMNY Post!

Product Review ~MUD Towelettes~

New (York City) Blog!

Read More of "Hello, New York City!" at One More New Yorker

LOL Spam

Tie Bar Helps Men Coordinate Outfits

Scary Mascara - Three Product Reviews

LOL Spam

50 Books - The Conclusion

Good Buys at Goodwill

Metropolitan Museum Costume Gala

Exclusive Fashion Club Membership for Style Bard Readers!

Product Review ~Clinique's Even Better Makeup SPF 15~

LOL Spam

Free Jewelry by Peggy Li Winner -- Update

World Blog Archive - Update

Glam Network Awards

PhotoDally

Style Bard Faves

Three Years and Counting

Weekly Updates for SB and SBS