Girl in the Meadow

A trip to the Nairobi National Park in Nairobi, Kenya

2020-11-17T20:19:00.001+03:00

Recently, a friend of mine invited me to take a tour of the Nairobi National Park. Having never done a game drive so close to the City, I jumped at the invite. Nairobi National Park is the only park located in a Capital City in the World.

Animals that you are likely to see in the park include;

Zebra

Giraffes

Ostriches

Monkeys

We also sighted two Lions although my Phone was out of charge by then. The only Big Five animal that is not found in the Nairobi National Park is the Elephant (ask your guide why). If you are in the Nairobi City for a few hours, you can jump in and take a game drive. Please ask for a guide at the Gate to make the trip memorable!

Walk away

2015-08-28T12:14:00.001+03:00

This is a post by Leo Babauta. See original post here http://mnmlist.com/walk-away/

mnmlist: be able to walk away

In any kind of negotiation, your ability to walk away is your strongest tool.

Those who can walk away from the negotiation — legitimately walk away, not just make a show of it — are in the strongest position. Those who are convinced they need to make the deal are in the weakest position.

This is true of negotiating when you're buying a car, closing the sale of your new home, haggling in a foreign flea market, or trying to get a raise.

It's also true of anything in life.

Know that there's almost nothing you can't walk away from.

If you are convinced you need a nice house with a walk-in closet and hardwood floors and a huge kitchen, you now have a weakness. You will give away precious life hours and savings to get it. Someone else who knows that those things aren't absolutely necessary can walk away, and not need to spend so much money (and thus work hours) on that kind of house.

If you are convinced that you need Stabucks grande lattes every day, or an iPhone or iPad, or an SUV or Cooper Mini or BMW … you are in the weak position, because you can't give it up. Someone else might know that those aren't essential to happiness, and can walk away.

If you know that the man who is treating you badly (but who you just know will change someday, because, you know, he loves you) isn't necessary for you to be happy, you can walk away. If you know that you can be happy alone, and that you need no one to make you happy, you can walk away.

If you know that there's almost nothing you can't walk away from, you can save yourself tons of money. Years of time. Mountains of headaches and heartaches. Boatloads of suffering.

You don't need to walk away from everything, but you should know that you can. And when the cost of the deal is too great, too dear … walk away.

Let's talk personal finance- Part 1

2014-12-05T12:57:00.001+03:00

When i read my blog these days, I feel disconnected from it as much of my experiences then were those of a carefree young 20 year old something with a lot of insecurities. For this reason, i was unable to keep updating the blog but then my blog has to take some new turn that of my 25- now years. I have changed a lot, made a lot of mistakes, lost friendships, made new friends, loved and lost. I hope to catch up on lost time of not blogging on my life as i should have.

Something interesting happens once you leave school and start working; independence. Independence means freedom and freedom has responsibilities. When I was in school, my parents catered for all my expenses, monitored my friends, monitored my activities and were generally responsible for your living.

After school, those responsibilities shifted to me. I was very happy with the freedom but freedom comes at a cost; always. Be prepared.

Anyway, let's go to the topic of the day, finances

I got my first permanent job when i was about 25 years old. My starting salary was not enviable, but still decent for the kind of pay, i hear people getting these days.

I am now self employed and I would like to share a few tips for how i got to where I am and survived the first year of not being permanently employed. I am not rich, but again, i depend on myself for a living.

What i should have done/not done:

Joining A SACCO

I did not join a SACCO when i first started working. A SACCO works to pull resources together and gives you ability to borrow at least 3 times of your savings. While most SACCO members are joined together by something common, these days there are SACCOs that accept general membership. Members guarantee each other loans.

Joining a SACCO immediately one gets a job can have many advantages. If i was only contributing Kshs. 10,000 each year for the 7 years that i was working, I would have been able to save at least Kshs. 840,000 and i would have been able to borrow Kshs. 2.52 Million (3 times of my savings). That amount is sans the interest that SACCOs typically give of between 5-12%..

The other advantage is that you cannot withdraw this money whimsically, the process of withdrawing your money may take even 3 months! The person who mentored me into joining a SACCO advised me to put part of my bonuses in the SACCO to make for lost time. I would refer you to this blog article if you are interested in learning more about SACCOs http://www.rookie-manager.com/uncategorized/isnt-a-sacco-just-a-bank/.

Word of advice; If you are newly employed, join a SACCO.

Not taking advantage of business opportunities

A lot of business opportunities have come up during the time that i have been employed. The most important of them I think I would have benefited is the MPESA agency business. MPESA is about 6 years old now, i was working when the agencies were rolling out and Safaricom was looking for agencies. I should have done my research about the agency business, i could have accessed funds through my payslip and I didn't. Those, who did are now reaping great benefits as MPESA continues to rely on its agencies for deposits/withdrawal. I am sure, Safaricom will continue to us its agencies and distribution network for rolling out new products in the market.

Buying a car

I bought my first car in 2009 (2 years after employment) and it has been a great lesson for me. First, the car i bought was an 1800cc. The car would turnout to be costly, for a city that has serious traffic. Any car that is more than 1500 cc tends to be a fuel guzzler especially in Nairobi where there is a traffic problem. On a normal week, I was spending about Kshs. 4,000 from Monday to Friday, add weekend and i easily spent Kshs. 20,000 a month on fuel.

With the salary I was earning at that time, I should not have bought a car at that point or I should have bought a car that was 1300 cc.

I also did not learn about car maintenance and therefore ended up paying for it dearly. At one instance, my car radiator burst and i had to replace it. All this because i did not know about car maintenance.

What i should have done was seek guidance from people who had owned cars before on the right car to buy and also on maintenance. Unfortunately, most of the mechanics we have in Kenya are quacks and will take every opportunity to give you wrong advice or sell you the wrong kind of spare parts. There are genuine shops especially in Industrial Area, buy your stuff there.

Also, I was very liberal with who drove my car. As long as you knew how to drive, had a driving license, you could drive my car. Big mistake. Not everyone who knows how to drive a car, should touch it. Infact, my personal rule now, is that I am the only person that drives my car. Reason being, most people will not take care of your car as you do and you can never know when went wrong. When things go wrong, you are on your own.

I will write about the things I have done well with my finances and other lessons i have learnt in Part 11.

Delay

2014-11-26T09:26:00.001+03:00

Taken from zenhabits.net by Leo Babauta

I once had a boss who had a favorite strategy for dealing with donations-seekers, demanding colleagues, and basically anyone who wanted anything from him he was reluctant to give.

Delay.

For example, lots of people would come to our office seeking handouts, and he didn't believe handouts were helpful. So he would tell me, "Just delay." And I would have to do it for him, asking people to come back tomorrow, or try next week, and so on. While my preference was just to tell them a straightforward "No", I have to admit that the delay worked. Most people would just go away and not come back.

I've found this strategy works really well with habits you're try to break. Delay.

An example: I tend to go back for seconds when I'm really hungry and especially if the food is really tasty. I found years ago that this didn't do well for my waistline, so I wanted to find a way to break the seconds habit. The delay strategy worked brilliantly: I would just sit at the table and read for a few more minutes, instead of going back for the seconds I really wanted, and eventually the hunger would subside and I'd be perfectly sated. Delay.

Another example: I often have the urge to go check email or one of my favorite online sites. Now that I notice this urge, I can tell myself, "Sure, you can go check them … in a minute." So I'd get back to writing my book, and delay. The urge went away. It came back later, but you can guess what I tried then. Delay.

And another: Sometimes I see something cool online that I really want to buy. My old habit is to quickly go to the site and place the order, and get it the next day. Instant gratification! Now I tell myself, "You can have it … tomorrow." And then tomorrow comes and I might not want it so bad anymore. If I do, I just tell myself, "Sure thing, Leo, but just wait one more day." Delay.

Yet another example: I would have the urge to go snack on something sweet or salty, and I used to rush to find the snack and shove it in my face, with no small amount of guilt sitting in my heart. Then I learned the power of delay, and instead I just keep myself busy for awhile. I do a workout, or go help one of my kids with something, or answer some emails that have been waiting for a reply. The snack urge goes away, because I delayed.

You can delay playing a video game or watching YouTube, by telling yourself that you can do it in an hour from now.

You can delay smoking by keeping yourself busy.

You can delay criticizing someone by delaying speaking, and instead focusing on your breath, and on listening.

What you don't want to delay is the stuff that really matters: creating, helping people, making a difference, building something, being supportive, appreciating the little things in life.

For the things that matter, act as if your hair is on fire, and brook no delay.

Kenyan Apps that I actually use

2014-10-04T12:13:00.001+03:00

1. MPESA Cost Calculator

One of Kenyan's peculiar habits include sending transaction fees when transferring money to them, Never mind it is for their convenience. As the sender you bear the burden for sending withdrawal fees to the recipient.

This app calculates transaction fees for MPESA. You can download it here.

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.ddsafrica.mcalc&hl=en

2. MA3ROUTE

I use it to track traffic before i leave the house. It can be used to track many things like where the speed cops are, gives information on heavy traffic expected and generally what is happening on Kenyan roads. Very useful app

Download it here

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.okune.findit&hl=en

3. SENDY

Although not compatible with my phone. I used this app once but through a longer route of contacting the developers of the app.

I think if you are running a small business, this is a very useful app that you can use to run your errands cost effectively.

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.sendy.co.ke.sendyy

There are many other apps i use which are not Kenyan. I look forward to seeing more Kenyans developing apps that you can actually use for your day to day life.

How KQ can improve Customer Experience

2014-06-18T20:11:00.001+03:00

Today my flight was late. I am not writing this post to complain about the late flight as I believe this is a common phenomenon all over the world. Rather, the missed experience for KQ to improve on its customer experience.

To be fair, the captain did finally explain the reason for the delay (about 3 hours later)

But at the boarding gate, the two ladies seemed clueless as to what time the flight would depart. Infact, they did not seem to enjoy the questioning.

Most of the time I have interacted with the KQ ground staff; they almost always seemed unbothered to explain. Infact, they almost always look bothered by your questioning.

I think this posits an opportunity for KQ to improve its customer experience while traveling with them.

KQ is always going to have delay issues, PLAN for them. That may seem like a no-brainer but to KQ it is not.

I met someone whose flight had been delayed for more than 6 hours. What did KQ expect the traveler to do? With an almost non-existent free duty area and space, KQ needs to plan an area for travellers whose flights have been delayed. It is not that traveler's fault that his/her flight had been delayed so why make it his/her problem how they would keep entertained.

It would be nice if that area had FREE wi-fi, charging areas, water, a television, FREE coffee and most importantly seating areas. A few desks would be provided for those who wished to work during the delayed period.

Maybe buying new Boeings is more important for KQ but I am sure to a passenger, good treatment from an airline when it does not keep its promise would be a better experience.

Do you have a tip on how KQ can improve its customer experience? Please share.

The Essence of Fatherhood: 6 Simple Lessons

2014-06-14T12:46:00.001+03:00

By Leo Babauta

I've been a father for more than 21 years, and have 6 kids altogether, and have loved every messy minute of it.

And now I have a young brother who's becoming a father this month, and is deeply scared by the prospect of fatherhood. He's not sure if he'll do a good job, worried he'll fail.

I can tell him this: being a father is the scariest thing I've known in my life. All of a sudden, I was 19 and in charge of a fragile human life, so precious and dear but so flickering and easily put out. And I was completely unprepared — no class in school taught me what to do, and I had very few life lessons by that time.

It was the most terrifying experience ever. And it's been the most rewarding thing I've ever done.

More rewarding than getting married, than running an ultramarathon, than starting a successful business, than helping thousands of people change their lives through my example.

But to be honest, I sucked at it at first.

My biggest problem, apart from a dreadful lack of knowing what the hell I was doing, was a sense of entitlement. My child should do what I say, behave a certain way, grow into the person I want her to be. That's ridiculous, I now know, but it caused me all kinds of conflict in the beginning.

I now see a father not as a shaper of clay, but a herder of cats. A father isn't molding a child into the perfect ideal of a human being he'd like her to be … he's trying to keep her alive, and feel loved, as she grows into whatever she already is.

So for young men who are becoming fathers, and young women becoming mothers as well (because there's not much difference other than anatomy) … here are my thoughts on herding cats. Just know that I've violated all of these ideas repeatedly, and learned these lessons the hard way.

Your first job is to love them. And to be there for them. This is above all other duties. Of course, we need to keep them safe and fed and clothed and change their diapers — keep them alive — and that's important. But let's consider that the baseline — it's not hard to keep a child alive into adulthood. Anyone can do it with a smidgen of effort.

What's important is whether the child grows into an adult who is loved. This is trickier, because in our entitlement to having the child behave the way we want her to behave, become who we want her to become, we tend to push, to judge, to expect, to scold, to drive wedges between our heart and hers. But in the end, all of those things just get in the way of the main duty: to have her be loved.

If at the end of your life you can say that you were there for your child, and she or he felt loved, then you've succeeded.

Your example is more important than your words. We often tell the child to be considerate as we yell at him, and so he doesn't learn to be considerate but to yell (only if he's the more powerful in the relationship). When we punish, they learn how to punish and not whatever other lesson we think we're teaching. When we put them on restriction, they aren't learning to share like we think they are.

If you want the kid to grow up healthy, you should exercise and eat healthy foods. If you want the kid to find work that he's passionate about, do that yourself. If you want the kid to read, then turn off the TV and read. If you don't want the kid to play video games all day, shut off your computer.

A hug is more powerful than punishment. A hug accomplishes your main duty (to love), while punishment is the example we're setting for the kid (to punish when someone makes a mistake). When a child behaves badly, this is a mistake. Are we adults free from mistakes? Have we never been upset, never behaved badly, never given into temptation, never told a lie? If we have done any of these things, why are we judging our child for doing them, and punishing her for them?

What's more important than judging and punishing, when a child makes a mistake and behaves badly, is understanding. Empathy. Put yourself in her shoes. What would help you in that situation? Have compassion. Give a hug. Show how a good person behaves, though the example of a hug. And yes, talk about the problem, get them to understand why the behavior wasn't so great, get them to empathize with the person they've hurt, but learning to empathize must start with your example.

Trust them. Let them take risks and fail, and show them that it's OK to fail, it's OK to take risks. Don't give them the neuroses of being afraid of every little risk, of worrying constantly about safety, of making a mistake and getting punished for it. They will fail, and your reaction to that failure is more important than the failure itself. You must show them that the failure is just a successful experiment, where you learned something valuable.

If you trust them, they will learn to trust themselves. They will grow up knowing that things can go badly but trust that all will turn out OK in the end. That's a trust in life that's incredibly valuable.

Let them be who they're going to be. You aren't in control of that. You might care deeply about something but she doesn't. You might think what she cares about is trivial, but that's who you are, not who she is. Let her express herself in her way. Let her figure out things for herself. Let her make choices, mistakes, take care of her own emotional needs, become self-sufficient as early as she can.

Read with them. Play ball with them. Take walks and have talks with them. Gaze up at the stars with them and wonder about the universe. Make cookies with them. Listen to their music and dance with them. Greet them in the morning with a huge smile and a warm, tight embrace. Do puzzles together, build a robot together, get into their blanket forts, pretend to be a prince or a Jedi with them, tell them stories you made up, run around outside, draw together, make music videos together, make a family newspaper, help them start a business, sing badly together, go swimming and running and biking and play in the monkeybars and sand and jungle.

Each moment you have with your child is a miracle, and then they grow up and move away and become their own person and figure out who they are and get hurt and need your shoulder to cry on but then don't need you anymore.

And so in the end, fatherhood is being there until they don't need you to be there, until they do again. And it's not a thankless task, because they will thank you every day with their love, their presence, their smiles. What a joyful thing, to be a dad.

Seriously..Send Harambee Stars to World Cup

2014-06-14T12:22:00.001+03:00

There are a million things wrong with Uhuru Kenyatta's Jubilee Government. But this one takes the cup.

http://www.the-star.co.ke/news/article-171193/uhuru-sponsors-harambee-stars-world-cup-brazil

Please help me understand, if you wanted to clean your city, would you start by buying brooms, garbage cans etc or you would go to see the cleanest city in the world?

How a populist decision can that be. I used to think Raila was a populist but this kijana *ahem* takes the cup.

Running a country i presume requires some strategic thinking not populist decisions unless it is election time.

Here are some thing Uhuru may require to do;

1. Find out why the team is not performing as he expects.

2. Marshall resources to fix the problem; human and capital.

3. Prune anyone who is not helpful for the game.

4. Train the team.

Stop wasting your money Mr. President and just use a little of the brain resources around you.

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU WANT TO QUIT YOUR JOB

2014-06-07T02:34:00.001+03:00

I recently quit my job. I have always wanted to feel in full control of my time; as to whether that was a good decision or not we will see.

It has now been 3 solid months of no paycheck and I have been asked by several people who want to quit their jobs, what do you do? With school fees, medical expenses, rent and so forth, why would anyone quit their job? Some people thought I was being outright ungrateful for a good job.

What has been interesting is that i have met a lot of people who are in business, some who do not have a college diploma but are doing great things.

So this is how you quit your job.

1. Have a plan! Planning for exit from employment should be like planning for any big event in your life. I started by having an exit plan like what I will do when I exit. I set up my company in 2011 and started operations then, getting a few clients here and there. By the time, I quit my job; I had a few clients who could sustain my business. If you are going to quit in a year's time, incorporate your company now. See how to here. This helps especially when you are bidding for jobs, to show that your company has been in existence for a longer period. You will realize that it is very hard to break down the structures created by an 8-5 job, my system craved for it. I thought maybe I should go back. I even made one job applicationJ.

2. Set a financial target. Set aside six months of expenses that will enable you to live comfortably for the next six months assuming your grand plan does not work. Plan for everything food, fuel, rent, medical etc. that may come up. As an employee, I prided myself in the safety and security a job offered. This means medical cover, a consistent salary etc.

You need to feel secure when you are quitting your job. My system would go into turmoil if I realized that I had to downgrade my life. So I needed to feel secure despite the fact that I was losing my monthly salary.

3. Save, save, save! I started by living like I had no income for a year (literally). I set about 4 standing orders to take care of any situation that could arise when I was jobless. So this mean unnecessary expenditure like the coffee I am taking right now in a coffee house, shoes, clothes needed to be cut out mercilessly. Otherwise, I would have remained a slave to employment and to a lifestyle that I could never maintain without a job. I am lucky to have read the book "Rich Dad, Poor Dad" early in life (straight out of college) as it has defined the path that I have taken with my financial resources. Although I have done silly things like buying a car when I should have been investing in land (yawa), I have not adopted a lifestyle that could only be funded with a salary and that would ensure I was enslaved to my job forever.

4. Side hustle. "The hustle is real". Start your side hustle now! During your spare time (8 hours extra) start testing your side hustle. Preferably do something that you know. Do not allow your employer to take all your time. One day, the employer will carry out a restructuring that might leave you in the cold. So "mind your own business".

5. Worst case scenario- if you have been contributing to a pension fund, chances are that it is pretty decent if you have been in employment for seven years like I have. You can fall back on this cash (not advised though) but it is good to know that you can access this money if anything ever happens.

Entrepreneurship/self employment/business creates job opportunities in a country and it never hurts to try. In any case, if you have strong skills you can re-enter the job market but for me I am will to risk it and see what happens!

Letter to an 18-year-old on the Career Path Less Traveled

2014-01-22T10:59:00.001+03:00

By Leo Babauta

ecently an 18-year-old who is finishing school wrote to me, asking for advice on choosing a career without enough life and work experience to make an intelligent decision.

He said, "Should I take the road less traveled, which may be risky and fearful, or choose a college course that interests me to some degree and see where that leads to. I suppose I don't want to end up as the typical everyday-joe at the office from 9-5. I want to be different from the masses, to make an impact on this world, to be fulfilled. How do I get the best start into adulthood?"

It's such a great question. And what I love is that he's asking the question in the first place — most 18-year-olds just take the safe route.

Here's what I'd say: take the career path less traveled.

If you don't want to be the typical Everyday Joe, in a 9-to-5 office job, don't go the route that everybody else takes.

If you want to be different than the masses, you have to take a different path.

I took the safe path when I was 18, and got a job and went to college, and it didn't screw me up … but it also took me nearly 20 years before I finally found what I loved to do. It was a struggle, being on the road that's well traveled, because I was consigned to a career I didn't really like.

Yes, the career path less traveled is scarier. There are no guarantees. You are sticking your neck out, taking risks, being different, probably to the scorn of others. This is lonely.

But the loneliness is temporary. Soon you'll find others who are doing things different, and you'll connect with them in a way you'd never have connected with the people taking the safe path. You'll be inspired by them, and inspire them in turn.

And the scariness is a lesson worth learning — if you can overcome a bit of fear, you can do anything. You're not limited to the world of comfort and safety.

So what do you do on this scary, lonely, exciting path?

That's totally up to you — you are empowered to figure things out on your own.

But here are some ideas:

Learn about who you are. Meditate, and blog. Those are the best two tools for learning about yourself.
Teach yourself stuff. The Internet has anything you want to learn, from writing to 3D animation to programming to carpentry to guitar. Never stop learning.
Find out how to motivate yourself. There will be times when you don't feel like doing anything. This is a good problem to have, because you'll have to figure out how to solve it or else go get a boring job where someone motivates you. Solve it. You'll be much better prepared for the road.
Figure out what you're passionate about. This isn't easy, because it takes a lot of trial and error. Try a lot of things. When you get good at something, by the way, you'll like it much more. You'll suck at everything at first.
Help others. When someone doesn't know how to do something, teach them. When they need a hand, lend it. When they're stuck, offer yourself up. Seek ways to help. It will teach you a lot, including who you are and what you're passionate about. It's also good motivation.
Connect with others. Find people who love what you love, who are doing weird things, who travel, who make their own path. They are awesome and fun to hang out with.
Learn to need little. If you need very little, you don't need to make much. This frees you up to learn and explore more.
Explore the world. You can travel very cheaply if you need little. Meet new people. Learn languages. Work odd jobs.
Get really good at something. Practice, read more, watch others who are good, steal ideas and make them your own, work on projects that excite you and learn as you work on them, practice more.
Teach something valuable. If you learn to program, teach a beginner. If you learn poker or guitar or martial arts, teach that. People will thank you.
Get paid as a freelancer. When you've learned a skill, hire yourself out online. You don't have to be awesome yet, just don't charge a lot. Try to really deliver. On time. Be trustworthy and your reputation will grow.
Sell something. Make a small product, whether digital or real world, and sell it. You learn a lot by selling.
Learn to be a good person. Show up on time. Try your best to meet deadlines. Be honest. Learn compassion. Keep your word. Especially to yourself.

If you do half these things, you'll love the path. If you do almost all of them, your impact on the world will be palpable.

And when you've been traveling this path for 6 months or more, write me back and tell me how it's going.

with love,
Leo

Art of Living- Leo Babauta

2013-11-12T11:31:00.001+03:00

http://zenhabits.net/aol/

For many years I simply lived, and got by.

But in the last few years, after learning a bit about habits and mindfulness and simplicity and love, I have changed my approach to living.

Now I see living as an art form, to be studied and played with and practiced and mastered. Of course, few ever master the art of living, and I don't know if I ever will. Probably not.

But I can pursue this art. I can appreciate it when others do it well. I can learn about it, through experiments and observation and introspection.

My pursuit of the art of living is only just beginning, but I thought I'd share a bit about this pursuit with you, my good friends.

Beginning the Pursuit

The journey begins with a single step, a wise man said, and for me that first step is simple:

Admit I don't know.

Learning begins by emptying your cup, so that you can fill it with what you find. Emptying your cup means getting rid of pre-set opinions.

I don't know what the art of living is, but I am curious.

And so the path is one of open hands, of curiosity and finding out.

And it's one of bare feet, of being open and naked, willing to be exposed to life and chaos.

It's about clear seeing, mindfulness turned to seeing reality as it is, without trying to make things rosy or conform to the story you tell yourself.

Clear seeing, naked, open hands, curious without knowing. That's the path that I've found, so far.

The Art Emerges

With clear seeing, I start to see why I (and others) suffer, why we stress and get mad at each other and want more and more.

And now I can start to apply the art of living to my days.

Here's what I practice with, imperfectly:

Compassion. Instead of being angry or frustrated, I find the pain in others, and open my heart to them. This includes compassion for myself.
Gratitude. Life is filled with wonder, and the people around me as well. I try to open myself to that wonder, and be grateful it's there, instead of complaining.
Joyfear. Joy is an awesome thing to have, but joyfear is present in the powerful moments in life where joy and fear mix, where we're taking chances and doing something outside of our comfort zone that both excites us and makes us face the possibility of failure. I now embrace these moments rather than avoiding them.
Not avoiding discomfort or uncertainty. When we avoid discomfort, we are limited by our comfort zone, and new learning and new ventures become impossible. When we avoid uncertainty, we only stick to what we know. But we can purposely become good at discomfort and uncertainty, by practicing in small bite-sized chunks, over and over.
Staying with the moment, even when it's hard. This is the hardest of all. "Living in the moment" sounds wonderful, but actually staying with the present moment isn't ever easy. Try it: with your eyes open, sit still and stay with the sights and sounds around you for 1 minute, without your mind wandering away from them. If you don't notice your mind wandering, either you're an experienced mindfulness practitioner, or you didn't notice when your mind wandered.
Relationships are everything. Getting what we want, having things our way, having control, being right … these things matter nothing compared to relationships. Imagine being in your death bed at the age of 80 … will your sense of being right and in control comfort you when you have no good relationships, no one who has loved you? Put relationships first.
Not holding on to expectations & judgments. Expectations and judgments prevent me from enjoying what I have, from enjoying the simple presence of someone else in my life. I practice with noticing these expectations and judgments, and practice with holding them loosely, letting them go.
Letting go. This is the art of living in two words: letting go. It's letting go of judgments, expectations, wanting to be right, wanting to control, fear of discomfort, fear of uncertainty, fear of failure, fear of boredom, comparing myself to others, wanting distraction, being irritated, complaining. It's noticing when I'm holding these, and letting go. Loosening my heart's grip on any of these, and letting go. And then letting go again. And again.

And so the art of living is a practice, one that doesn't end, that doesn't have a mastery level. It's a constant letting go, a constant picking up again, and then letting go again. And falling, and getting up without beating myself up.

The art of living is the art of getting back up.

Judicial Services Commission- Questions

2013-10-22T15:01:00.001+03:00

I live in the quite dramatic country called Kenya. Inhabited by 35 million, only a few political players call the shots and everyone else seems to be invisible in Kenya.

Mrs. Gladys Boss Shollei, a former university lecturer, then Editor, Kenya Law, Deputy CEO at IEBC and formerly, Chief Registrar, the Judiciary has been what it seems unceremoniously sacked at the Judiciary.

The truth is i have not insider information from the judiciary apart from the newspaper "He said, She said".

My questions for Kenyans is;

1. Don't we have anything better in this country that works or why are we fixated with a few people.

2. As we are fixated with these few people, a lot of them are making money with serious investments, huge ranches, good government deals etc. I wish i could have time to do my own " Who owns Kenya?"

3. Is this fixation, a smokescreen. That Kenyans may never move beyond fixating on these few political players and focus on improving their lives?.

4. Don't we ever learn?

Filed under Stupidity

Ode to My Beloved-

2013-10-10T17:05:00.001+03:00

I wrote this when i lost my auntie in 2010. I miss her terribly.

t is the end of the beginning of a beautiful story that would bring even the most genius storyteller into shame. As I sit here, not knowing what to do, scribbling furiously with my keyboard well, I refuse to go for a meeting to discuss your untimely demise for now, I don't know what to do. Yet I know, honestly, I do not have the strength to deal with everyday issues especially such as this one. But for sure, it will never be easy, not now, not ever.

I remember the day I met you. It was a sunny day, my great grandmother's funeral. It was your sense of style that struck me and I was barely 12 years. I thought you looked great, I didn't even know we were going in the same direction! Later I was to meet this lady my uncle was enamored with. I watched you two from a distance, sitting on the same mat, eating from the same plate and who would have thought one day I would be as wretched and grief stricken to watch you leave this earth without as much as a goodbye. Few years later, we had you in the family and even the success card you sent me in standard eight is somewhere in my box, the one I keep all the old letters.

We grew to love you, for you were giving without compromise and yet we all knew how strong you were. You took all of us like your own. You were like a second mum, we sat I talked, you listened, you gave me feedback. Even the way we got stuck during the post election violence when we didn't have fuel! Yet you gave my uncle life, you gave him babies and most of all you loved him in a way no one else could. I understand his pain now. Some people are just rare and maybe that's why God wanted you for himself. Gosh, the way you always brought samosas and gifts for my brother's birthday.
Now most I think of is your son, that whom you died for so that he may live. What a great sacrifice! I know he will never be grateful; it will be always a painful thing to him. A child left at its infantry with no mother and yet it is the greatest sacrifice that of love, the ability to give up your life for someone else, no one else could do that. Yet that heroic act is what we mourn today. We mourn all the young life you had, the beauty, your true spirit, the hope and the undying love you had for all of us.

Your laughter, wisdom is all etched in my mind today and thereafter.

Do you know your tenant? 2 simple ways to find out.

2013-10-01T16:34:00.001+03:00

One of the worst rumours (or is it confirmed?) during the Westgate terror attack was that the terrorists might have been tenants of the Westgate Mall.

Some of us actually let out our premises to strangers without having any identity of the person/company renting the premises and as it has been shown this can be disastrous. It does not need to be a thorough review but using this 2 Government tools can save you a lot of headache later.

1. PIN Checker- Unless you are minor, it is a requirement to have a Personal Identification Number in Kenya. The PIN system at KRA is linked to the department of immigration. Using this link, you can check the validity of a PIN

http://www.kra.go.ke/index.php/pin-checker

2. National ID - Given at 18 years of age, this is the document that is given as a form of identity in Kenya. One trick you can use is check the age of the person and usually, another person of the same age would have the same ID number (especially the first 2 digits of the ID are similar .

If someone insists that they are using a waiting car, you can check the status of the ID with a waiting number here or simply go to Immigration and confirm http://www.identity.go.ke/index.php/check-id-status

3. What about foreigners?

Well, they should have a passport, work permit/visa allowing them to stay in the country for a specific period of time and as a pre-caution do a google search/image search just to make sure they are not wanted criminals.

One thing i known about the majority of many Kenyans, they do a lot of things "chini ya maji" as we are inherently good people but well times are changing, kaa chonjo!Obviously, report any dubious person to the police.

Kid Entertainment in Nairobi Part 1- Karura Forest

2013-09-17T13:51:00.002+03:00

Kid Entertainment in Nairobi Part 1- Karura Forest

Update: It is now against the rules to carry plastic bottles or bags to Karura. Remember to pack all your snacks into reusable bottles and containers.

Karura Forest!

I love taking my child to Karura Forest. These are the reasons why;

1. It is cheap. You only pay Ksh. 140 (Kshs. 100 for adults ad Kshs. 40 for a child to enter the park for Kenyans. Please find out more about the fees here.

2. There are many activities you can do with your child (you will need to be creative though). Activities that you can do though include;

Cycling- I need to teach my daughter how to cycle but if your kid can cycle, they can do so without fear of being run over! Update: She can now cycle well.

Tennis- They have a tennis court for practice sessions just near to the field. I do not know how much they charge though. The coach told me to wait until my daughter is 4 years old so she can be "trainable". Update: She is now 10! Still hasn't taken up to it.

Walking and Running

Usually, I park at the gate and we walk to and from the KFEET Centre which is a 2 km walk. I have had to carry her on my back to the gate though! You can also walk your dog with some rules of course! Update: I no longer carry her but I have a daughter who is now 2.5 years.

Football

I remember when I bought the ball, the vendor asked me if my child was a boy! Of course, I said no but I wonder why the stereotyping! Playing football in the open field is great for both of you!

Swings and Slides

There are very high-quality swings installed by a steel company. There are 2 swings and 2 slides which are hardly in use! Go on rock yourselves out and remember how to swing.

Teaching

There is no better way to teach my daughter colours than with nature and with the fact, there are so many flowers and butterflies, we can describe most of them. The Centre also organizes school trips for children to learn.

There are so many things to see in Karura Forest, the Waterfalls, Lily Lake, the Caves! Kindly enquire about getting a map at the gate to guide you through.

Part 11 coming soon

Please check out the Friends of Karura Website

Some tips on building a business

2013-07-31T14:47:00.001+03:00

Businesses are registered by the hundreds at the Registrar of Companies every week and even more business are being run on the side without any formal registration. But does registering a business name or limited company make you a business owner? Here are some tips to transform your registered company into a business.

Tip 1: Have a plan

A lot of us Kenyans register businesses without a plan. I have in the recent past asked at least 5 small business owners if they had a plan before beginning to carry out their activities and it seems that many businesses operate without a plan. Why do you need a plan in first place?

A plan enables a business to map out revenue streams (in short, how the business will make money), where the business will play in terms of locale, target customers e.t.c. (you can't be everything to everyone!), how the business will market its services and how much money is required to start?

As a business owner, If you approach the bank or Micro finance institutions or in the worst case scenario the venture capitalists, they will need to evaluate the business plan. That is to tell them, "how will you make money and how will you pay us" and if there are any chances of survival in the business field chosen within the prevailing socio-economic and political environment. After all, statistics show that new businesses do not survive the first six months. What I have just stated above is very simplistic, in the real world, a business plan requires a lot of research and most of the times companies hire an expert in this area.

Also market research is vital in that it provides a business with knowledge about its competitors and if there is viability in starting a certain company. When choosing a location or type of business, it is important to ask yourself if there are similar businesses in that area and even if there are, how your business will differentiate your products or service. I have seen butcheries located within a few steps of each other and in low populated areas and that just shows that the owner did not think about the location of the business.

A business that is not well thought out i.e. having considered the opportunities as well as threats prevailing might be one of the reasons a business may not survive. An example could be the recent demolition of a well-known garage on Westlands Road. The land on which the garage was built belonged to a private developer who as things may seem had not given consent for use of the land. I do not have a lot of details on this one but it makes little sense to build a huge customer base, brand equity and a business on a location that you are not sure of its ownership. I remember Barclays Bank refused to open a branch in Kasarani for the mere reason that the owner of the plot did not have a title deed. The thing is big businesses do not just do things for the sake.

To put up your business anywhere, have a lease, a business permit and any other thing that is required to operate your business or one day you might wake up to either government or city council demolition.

Resources

http://smeafrica.net/

http://kenya.smetoolkit.org/kenya/en/category/1001/Business-Plans

http://www.myownbusiness.org/

Tip no. 2 Register a Limited Liability Company

Registering a sole proprietorship is fine when you are starting and the finances are still tight but it is extremely crucial to register a Limited Liability Company. There is no difference between a sole proprietorship and the person. The main advantage of a limited liability company is that it confers; Corporate personality – a limited company is a legal person and hence can own assets and liabilities protecting you as a person from taking liability for debts owned by a company. Resources

http://capitaregistrars.co.ke/2011/08/procedure-for-the-registration-of-a-limited-company-in-kenya-2/

Learn to protect your company and your assets

There are many ways of protecting your company;

1. Copyrights

2. Trademarks

3. Patents

The Kenya Intellectual Property Institute (KIPI) is charged with registering trademarks and patents while the copyright board is charged with registering copyrights.

Registering intellectual property does not require a lawyer to do! There is a misconception that it is a very complicated process involving a lot of money. All you require is go to KIPI and ask for advice on how to progress with the registration.

Resources

www.kipi.go.ke

Tip no. 3 Separate ownership and management

Richard Branson says that he is only involved in a company while setting it up and then leaves the Chief Executive to run the company, recruit staff and develop the company. Eventually, larger companies choose to list on the stock exchange.

Management is involved in the day to day running of the company.

In fact, in Robert Kiyosaki's Cashflow Quadrant, the greatest assets to an entrepreneur are OPM (other People's Money) and Other People's Skills. This is because the company can recruit persons with different competencies that will help you run the company and grow it to the next level.

Business development

Having a technical skill does not an entrepreneur make! There is a different set of skills that are required to let say run a company like Microsoft. Yes, the company may be known for software development but its main strength comes from shipping and selling products in most of the continent in different languages. I read an article from I suppose a frustrated technical guy at Microsoft showing how shipping a product is important for Microsoft. The techies might complain of a product having bugs and all but for most of consumers, if Ms. Word works, nothing else matters.

I have witnessed technical people trying to present to the Tender Committee and while they may know their product, let just say it's important to hire someone who can sell the product successfully.

Resources

This article is not exhaustive on how you can develop and grow your businesses but there are a lot of resources online that you can read (and implement) as listed below;

1. Maple Resource Centre http://www.maplekenya.com/

2. Personal MBA www.personalmba.com

3. Small business administrations (US based) http://www.sba.gov/

4. Coursera runs courses throughout the year www.coursera.org

--
http://sylkwan.blogspot.com

"The most you can do for a friend, is be his friend."

Is the workplace in Kenya ready for women

2013-03-21T13:18:00.001+03:00

When i fell pregnant 3 things happened at my work place

1. I was passed over for a promotion.

2. I became the "most" invaluable employee according to my supervisor and almost lost my job

3. I changed departments because the current supervisor could not adjust.

When i came back from maternity leave, i was given one hour off for 3 months. That meant either i come in at 9 and leave at 5 and in Kenyan traffic terms, that means there is no real difference.

What about a mother's room you ask. I needed to express milk at least twice a day. I had to do it in a dingy room that was unused at the time. No provision was made, use that room ama jipange. I never looked at HR in the same way again.

I guess the long and short is workplaces are not ready for women or mothers and all we can wait with baited breaths is for our HR to read Lean In and adjust accordingly.

About women not scoring political seats

As i was waiting to vote, scores of women came with children issues. Some were pregnant (though you could hardly see), others picked the neighbours kids, others, maybe their own kids.

So if you cannot queue for 5 hours to vote because of women problems, how could you lead anything. I think those women seen as weak by the male influenced a lot of the decisions for men outside.

Dusting

2013-02-27T11:03:00.001+03:00

It's been a while since i have blogged. There are many times i compose a whole blog in my head but somehow work and other priorities get in the way.

I really hope i get the motivation to blog soon as when i read through my old posts i can always tell where i was at the time and how far i have come from. It's always though a shaky moment for me as i can feel all the insecurities i suffered in my twenties.

There are many things that have since changed. I am now a mother of one little beautiful girl aged 2 years 8 months. I have changed jobs somewhat and that has been difficult but rewarding. When you are stuck in a legal job, you miss out on other growth areas.

I am now reading Zen Habit's How to find motivation and i hope it will help.

101 things to do in Nairobi, Kenya

2012-12-07T14:21:00.001+03:00

http://migrationology.com/2011/01/things-to-do-in-nairobi-kenya-101/

Reasons why Africa is poor according to me

2012-08-31T10:30:00.001+03:00

Disclaimer: I have not done any research.

1. The standards of being rich changed

Africans riches were measured by number of cows, number of children, being an elder and things that mattered like those. This has changed over they years. You are rich if you can grab yourself the best land, have the most money and such other inconsequential things.

2. Urbanization (include modernity and its variations here)

Africans lived in villages. They moved when the season changed. God knows where we would be by now. Look at how bright we were to avoid summer and winter!

3. Africans food their own food, fruits grew on trees and we hunted the rest

Seriously, when i was growing up strawberries and blueberries were fruits that we just plucked on the trees as we ran and played. You just need to go to the supermarket and get shoked by the price of these fruits. We grew our food by the river streams. In short, food was in great supply! I imagine at a point my ancestors just went out and shot the animals and brought home food. Now it would be considered animal cruelty. Ahem.

4. Cars, trains, railways and all other things that require fuel

Kenya spends (let me google that) I cannot get the real figures but i believe in billions in importing oil. Money that could be used on other essentials like basic human needs, food, water, health, dignity.

5. Monogamy

I am a Christian (no stones here) but monogamy is one of the practices that has brought problems to African children. No wonder we have so many on the street because a man can only marry the only woman he wants to live with. It didn't matter in the past, he married the one with his child and he was free to marry others as well. African children were brought up by the village.

6. Land ownership

Land was communal. Now we have people who own land, huge tracts of land causing all manner of problems to the community.

And now i remember that we also had traditional medicine healers, midwives who were all dismissed.

I am tempted to see in the face of modernity what we can do to solve our problems in the traditional way. Again no research will be done.

Kenyans at the Olympics 2012

2012-08-02T14:51:00.001+03:00

I really just wanted to find out about the Kenyans participating in Olympics 2012!

The Brand Kenya team is doing well with the online publicity and Social Media during the Olympics. I would like to know the end result of this! I must congratulate Brand Kenya for this extremely well thought out online strategy.

First there is the Kenya House from where Ms. Julie Gichuru has been reporting Live on Citizen! You can even take a Virtual Tour

http://www.kenyahouse.or.ke/

They are requesting for people to use Google Hangouts, signing up for a few myself to experience.

The country has a Wikipedia Page dedicated to Kenyans participating in the 2012 London Olympics which is also great! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kenya_at_the_2012_Summer_Olympics

Not to mention the Flash Mob You Tube Video created by DSTV

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=worZ21sXR3w

We wish the Kenya Olympic Team the best. Bring on the Medals!

Online shopping in Kenya; coming of age?

2012-07-25T15:38:00.001+03:00

Kenyans always catch up with the world at least technologically. A few Kenyans that is. There is still a hoard of people who would think the word Yahoo is a contortion of the word taboo.

Believe the hype though Facebook is everywhere. At least my grandmother heard that one of my cousins was taking a stab at another on Facebook. I am sure she does not understand why it was worse on facebook. My point first is to let you know that inequality in Kenya is real. And that does not mean between the rich and the poor, it is between the technologically advanced and the technologically deficient. Not to say that i cannot access my data needs in my shags, i often do. Infact i suspect if i ever lived there, that is all i would ever do. But the truth is the people in my village just don't know about all this hype.

Online shopping in Nairobi is growing. It all started with Facebook and their business pages.Suddenly there are so many invites to like pages of businesses and events. There are business which owe their business to facebook. But why not, in this day of expensive goodwill to set up shop and the business permits, setting up shop online maybe the online way out for our young ones. And i guess that's is what all these all M-Vitus (as M would call them are all about). Trying to connect the Kenyan consumer and supplier.

I am a huge fan of baby stuff as with all other mums so the only one i can share are those i have used to shop for my toddler. My experience with Biashara has been less than satisfying so i ventured online to see the stuff plus there is little time to shop physically.

1. Totally Toto This is one of the well run online stores. They cater mainly for the younger ones (0-12months). Their quality is top notch.

2. Totspot I have shopped in this store many times as they cater for the older ones more than the younger ones. Delivery is efficient, the clothes are longlasting

3. Enzi Chic I have shopped here once and their clothes are lovely. I just doubt if there are really from Burberry and OshKosh. That dress costs at least $ 135 dollars but would cost Ksh. 1, 500 here. The math just does not add up. The clothes last though.

4.Smart Baby Kenya The owners runs it from the apartment that she lives in. She lived in the US (obviously), in Kenya letting strangers into your house is not easy. The clothes are beautiful.

5. Kenya Business online I only have one advice to offer. Sort out the websites by the Industry. For example i am only interested in Furniture, baby clothes, African wear. Their business are sorted A-Z which can make it tedious for someone looking for a specific solution. However the initial followers like www.cake.co.ke probably benefited too much from Google's advertising. You can check this one for delivery of fresh vegetables http://freshandmore.kbo.co.ke/
6. Strawberry Store This is like a franchise of IKEA and mainly sells household goods.

Enter the world of wannabe Groupon

Anyone on twitter and facebook has seen some agressive marketing by Rupu and Zetu. They offer deals to customer, sometimes they claim 50% off. With all honesty i have bought those deals a couple of times and these are my comments;

1. Shops running deals are often not too enthusiastic to offer the services and/or are too tired to do so within the time stipulated. Once my friend bought me a deal on Zetu http://www.zetu.co.ke/nairobi/ksh850-53-discount-professional-manicure-and-swedi .

I planned on having the services at the end of the period. So I got there on a saturday afternoon there very enthusiastic about the Swedish massage.I had been talking to this girl the whole week and she was fine with me redeeming the deal on that date.

Upon my arrival at New York Salon at Yaya, Nairobi and asking to redeem the deal, i was told that the lady who was running the deal had left to be married and would not be coming back until 3 months later. I told them, the deal was not run by the lady but by the New York Salon and if i was not wrong i was at the New York Salon. Needless to say i only left after they had perfomed their end of the bargain.I promised myself to shun away deals by the New York Salon.

2. I am not sure they investigate the capacity of the outfit running the deals to provide the services. The deals are used by up and coming business to gain some competitive advantage over well established businesses. Not a bad thing but make sure that the company can meet their end of the bargain. Recently i bought another one from Rupu. Karembo Designs was offering the deal. Needless to say. I am still waiting for the delivery.

I am very skeptical about taking another deal.

That said online stores are going to grow in Kenya. Thankfully though, most of the times you pay on delivery. I would be skeptical of paying before viewing the goods.

That said i wish that Nakumatt, Uchumi, Tuskys and all major shopping outlets could follow suit! Nakumatt though has announced on its website that online shopping could be coming soon.

Online payment systems

In Kenya, i only know two online payment systems

1. Pesapal Kenya which is run by the Verviant Group. Pesapal is established running payments systems like www.ticketsasa.com and is used by the likes of Nairobi Securities Exchange to sell data and Networking in Heels Events owned by Violette Wambua to sell tickets. It incorporates Paypal, MPESA and Airtel money, Yu cash, Equity Bank. Check their website www.pesapal.com

2. Ipay is owned by Intrepid which offers web design and hosting services. It uses M-PESA, Airtel Money, yuCash, VISA, Master Card and Kenswitch. I am not so sure of the uptake of this one.

There is obviously a growing market for online services and services providers of internet security, payment systems better take note.

Visiting Nairobi? Here is somethings you can do

2012-07-18T10:34:00.001+03:00

Having recently visited outside of the country, I always get frustrated about doing things where i can meet locals or do things that are not especially "touristey".
I can imagine what others visiting here must wonder what to do when you are in Nairobi.

1. Buy yourself a cellphone Safaricom/Airtel/Orange/Yu line to keep in touch with your family & friends. Calling using a Kenyan line is cheaper than roaming This are sold all over the town. Unlike places like Dubai where getting a line is almost impossible. Also to dial an international number put + before the international code.

2. Eating out? In the hotel. Most hotels serve your basic buffet which can get a little boring when you are visiting. To check places see here http://www.eatout.co.ke/

3. Other things to do. Some people are not just into going out and having a warm beer at the carnivore. They need to run, jog, swim and other things that make them closer to nature If you are new in Nairobi, you can join many groups that are dedicated to the activities you love. See www.jambonairobi.co.ke.

4. Where to live? A lot of expatriates/visitors to Nairobi always wonder where to live. They end up in overpriced furnished apartments. There are plenty of places to stay in Nairobi. Do your research or use services like www.hassconsult.co.ke

5. You can also organize trips with companies like www.bonfireadventures.com where you can meet Kenyans on the trips and make friends.

Set yourself free

2012-07-18T10:00:00.000+03:00

Just checking in here!

Taxi Driver

2012-04-04T16:14:00.000+03:00

I love chatting taxi drivers. So i was lucky one of those days while travelling from Mombasa Rd to town. Anyone on that route will tell you how long that can be on the busy hour. We started with small talk but because i had wanted to get a blogstory out of the mouth of a taxi driver, so i persisted to get the juicy stories. Thank God, this particular Taxi Driver was a willing talker. So we talked about the dangers of being a taxi driver, the way his friend had been carjacked on the previous weekend and abandoned in God knows where! All hair raising stories. He told me the way certain customers treat them like low lifes and would not even talk to them. Eventually it got to the story i wanted. Do female passengers harass you? He lightened up like he had been waiting to talk about this for a while. "Ukicheza utakufa" he said. I told him i did not understand what he meant. He said "things are hard for us on the road, you wouldn't believe what we go through" "Married women with rich husbands are the worst".. Ukiona watu wakitembea, waogope. Apparently their husbands are gone most of the time. I prodded him further. He gave me a story where he was almost raped. This woman asked me to help her put some luggage in her house and then she closed the door and said i could not leave. I had to plead my way out. His colleagues suffer the same. You just don't come from the village and think you are very smart. These women will finish you, he added. But i am willing to assist in a desperate case, he chuckled. What is your worst experience, i asked. Watching whores on K-Street, he replied. Apparently his foreigner clients love going to the Street. But he earns enough money from that, so he does it anyway. After a long ride with enough stories he told me at the end of the journey. Call me if you need any service. I laughed and left. Definitely with a story.