Finding Hope

Desperate

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Wed, 30 May 2012 18:03:00 +0000

That's how I feel.

Not in a dramatic way, just in a things-need-to-change way.

This is our office. Primary cause of desperation. Summer Project Numero Uno!

I'm going through Proverbs 31 with some amazing women. Each morning we read and share what we've learned. And it's been such a blessing to walk through this chapter with friends.

Cause you know what? If I was doing this alone, I would have already thrown in the towel. :)

That Proverbs 31 woman seems pretty perfect. She's got her act together. She is called NOBLE, she does good to her husband, she is wise in her shopping and cooking. The girl actually likes chores, for heavens sake!

Um, that is not me.

You're shocked, I know.

I am pretty much the opposite of all of those things. Except I'm an awesome shopper. But that's it. I don't think I'm noble in any sense of the word, sometimes I talk back to my husband, when I cook it's usually something like brownies or cookies (feeding the emotions, not the body), and I really can't tell you the last time I deep cleaned a bathroom.

In fact, most days, I don't even feel like I can do any of those things. Life seems too overwhelming. I work full time, I chase around a toddler all day long (and my exhaustion in regards to my kid has been validated - a handful of people this week looked at Emily running in circles-literally-and called her "a busy girl". Um, yes. Thank you.), and I really spend most of my days exerting energy on those two things. I try to sneak in "rest" any chance I get. Cleaning? Hmph.

So as I'm reading about this woman and learning how to apply her truths to my life, I just let the Lord know that this seems like too much. Like just another expectation I'm supposed to meet. Like one more thing I just don't have the energy to do. Maybe when I don't have a full time job. Maybe when Emily's older. Maybe tomorrow.

But most of the sentences above start with "I". And as I'm listing my valid excuses to the Lord, he comes alongside me and reminds me that it's nothing He's asking me to do in my own strength. It's in His.

The Lord doesn't expect perfection from me. I look at the Proverbs 31 woman and see a long list of things I'm already failing at. He looks at her and sees her heart. And He asks me about mine.

It's not about the list, Kayse. She can't do all of these things on her own either. It's about me. Where is your heart? Where are you finding your strength? Who are you focusing on? Yourself, or ME?

I'm a list girl. God's a heart guy. I think getting on board with Him will remind me to keep my priorities in order. It's amazing how remembering I'm not alone encourages me to serve with a purpose. Not to get things on my list accomplished, but to serve Him. The One who walks through it all with me.

The two biggest things I'm struggling with right now are my health and my house. My health has taken a backseat to my emotional eating and baking lately (funny how brownies and cookies make me feel so much better...momentarily). And while I've really been trying to improve in the cleaning arena (and I have improved, even Jon will tell you!), it's just not my strength, and I could really use some help/ideas/encouragement.

So this summer, I'm going to spend some time in two books that I'm really excited about. The first one I've read before - Made To Crave, by Lysa Terkeurst. She talks about being filled with the Lord instead of cookies and crackers. Yes, I could use that! I'll be going through her devotional "Craving God" every morning along with my Proverbs 31 study.

The second one I've had for a while but haven't gotten around to reading, although I've heard great things about it. It's called 31 Days To Clean - How To Have A Martha House the Mary Way, by Sarah Mae. In fact, this summer she's doing a series of cleaning challenges every week. I think it just might be exactly what I need.

I'm excited to spend this time in the Word and in the presence of other women serving the same God I am, learning from others who have been in my shoes.

I'm thinking that adding in these awesome studies is going to mean some other time-sucker is going to have to go. But that's a post for another day. :)

What are some ways you've learned how to stay motivated to eat healthy, and to keep a clean home? Have there been things you've needed to let go of to keep your priorities in order? I'd love for you guys to weigh in on this!

You Matter.

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Tue, 29 May 2012 07:03:00 +0000

So, for the last few days I've been trying to figure out what today's blog post should be about. What to write, what's important, what's worthwhile.

And I'm totally stuck.

Maybe that's not something I should tell you... :)

But it's the truth, and we're all about truth around here. I just haven't felt any specific inspiration for writing over the last few days. I know this has to do with work stress and a couple of other things, but I think that the main reason is that I've spent my emotional energy writing in another capacity.

Last night I finished the very very very rough draft of the first chapter of my book. :) And while I'm proud of myself and excited about that small milestone, there is still a lot ahead of me. Like two more chapters, a complete proposal, and a ton of editing before the middle of July.

Writing my own story is emotionally draining. Re-living times I have purposefully buried in the past is exhausting. But at the same time it's energizing to be working on a project that is bigger than me. It's so much bigger than me, and requires so much from me, that I'm only able to do it covered in prayer.

That's how I know it matters.

So essentially I have a few favors to ask you. First and foremost, would you pray for me and for my writing process if God brings it to your mind? I so badly want to write His words, and not my own. I do my best work when I just let go and write. But that's difficult for me to do when I'm trying to be more disciplined about making sure everything is done on time. This is just a new road for me, and I would so greatly appreciate your prayers.

Secondly, would you help me build my platform? Platform is an impossible but important thing in the publishing world. When I go to the She Speaks Conference in July, and meet with a publisher, they're going to want to know how many readers, Facebook fans, and Twitter followers I have. This is important because they need to know that I already have an audience of sorts, and people might actually be interested in the things I have to say (this is still sort of unbelievable to me). There are a couple of ways you can help me to build this up so I might actually have a chance of them taking me seriously. :)

"Follow" this blog. You can do this in the sidebar under "Fantastic Followers" - just click on the "Follow" button and sign up. That will make my blog appear in your Google Reader. You can do it privately so that no one (including me!) sees your name.

Subscribe by email. I just figured out how to send my blog posts to your email inbox. :) Cool, no? So if you'd like to have Finding Hope show up in your email every morning, enter your email address into the box to the right. Every subscriber is one more step toward credibility. :) *I also do not have access to these email addresses. They remain private and email updates are sent through a server.*

"Like" Finding Hope's Facebook page, and follow Finding Hope on Twitter. You can do both through clicking on the links above.

Vote for Finding Hope in Top Baby Blogs. I know it seems silly, but this is such an incredible help for me. Staying on the front page of TBB brings a fantastic increase in traffic for this site. It's a huge deal, and you can vote daily! Just click on the link, and then click the owl on the left to vote. There's also a voting link at the bottom of each post, and you can click on that to vote daily too. Tonight they reset all of their stats to zero, so your votes are super important right now! It would be amazing to stay in the Top 25 (on the front page), especially for the conference.

Share Finding Hope with your friends. Send an email, share on Facebook, tweet a post, share about this blog on your own blog, whatever. Don't do it just cause you like me (although I appreciate it and I like you too!), do it if you think that you know someone who would feel at home here, or would benefit from my brutally honest rants and confessions. :) I don't want numbers for the sake of numbers; I'd like to grow this community in an organic way. And word of mouth is always the best bet. You guys are the best publicity!

Thanks so much, friends. My goal is to reach 300 followers, 300 email subscribers, and 350 Facebook/Twitter fans before the conference. I'd love for those numbers to be even more solid (I've heard they start taking your blog seriously around 1000 followers), but I think 300 is a number that we can reach by then! But I can't do it without you. So can I humbly ask for your help without scaring you away? :)

And tomorrow I promise I'll come back with a post full of wit and depth and spiritual insight. For now I'll just leave you with a picture of the cutest kid I know. ;)

Will you help my mommy? If you do, I might let you wear my cool sunglasses!!

Meal Planning Monday!

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Mon, 28 May 2012 18:53:00 +0000

Better late than never, right? Here's what's on our plate this week - trying to work the coupons and sales!
MondayLeftovers {Spaghetti, enchiladas, mystery meat from the fridge...} TuesdayChicken Parmesan Meatloaf{I didn't get to make this last week, so I've still got all the supplies!}
WednesdayCrock Pot Chicken and Steamed Veggies
ThursdayBreakfast for Dinner
FridayTaco Night!
SaturdayHomemade Pizza
SundayHot Dogs and Burgers on the Grill
LunchesPB&JTurkey BurritosPaninisHomemade Ham and Cheese PocketsLeftovers
SnacksYogurtFruitString CheeseGranola BarsWater :)
Now it's your turn! Link up your own Meal Plan or your Favorite Recipe. Here's how it works. Every Monday, I'll post my meal plan, and Kelli will post hers. Each Meal Planning Monday will be a link up, so we can all share recipes, tips, and meal planning ideas! We only ask that you do two things in order to participate:1. Follow Finding Hope on GFC and The How To Mommy on Bloglovin'.2. Grab our button code from the box below and include our button somewhere in your post!

Remember.

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Mon, 28 May 2012 10:00:00 +0000

Please make sure that somewhere in between the BBQ's, beaches, and backyard parties, you take a minute today to thank someone who has served. If you know someone who is currently serving, make sure you thank their families too.

They give more than you can see. And I am grateful for their sacrifice.

May you celebrate the reason(s) for Memorial Day today, and not just the extra day off. :)

Kids Are Game Changers

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Sat, 26 May 2012 10:00:00 +0000

Before we had kids, Jon and I used to play normal games, like Rummy and Monopoly and Scrabble.

Now that we have Emily, we play new games, like this one:

We call it "See How Long The Leftover Goldfish Cracker Will Stay On The Bumper Of The Car."

We're going on a few days now. I'd say that's pretty impressive, seeing as how the car's been driven somewhere every day. I'm just not sure who's winning...us, or the goldfish?

Happy weekend. :)

How To Defeat An Exhausted Mother in 10 Easy Steps

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Fri, 25 May 2012 10:30:00 +0000

Step 1: Leave for dinner at 6:00 p.m., precisely 30 minutes before toddler's bedtime. Expect disaster.

Step 2: Arrive at super awesome restaurant that's hosting a Military Appreciation night. {Decide for the next hour that you will ignore the fact that you've decided not to eat at this restaurant until they take MSG out of their food. Instead, be grateful for a free meal.} Realize that free food means a bazillion kids, no free high chairs, and too much stimulation for your toddler.

Step 3: Stand in line to order food, while holding a toddler who wants to get down and walk. Count this as your workout for the day.

Step 4: Order and receive food, and ask husband to wrangle a high chair from one of the families with ~~monsters~~ children who are leaving.

Step 5: Place toddler in high chair. Buckle seatbelt extra tight, since your kid is skinny and seat belts are no match for her.

Step 6: Prep toddler's food while toddler spots the one and only balloon in the restaurant and yells "BOON! BOON!!" at the top of her lungs. Thank God that chicken nuggets are something she will actually eat.

Step 7: Take back your thanks, as chicken nuggets begin to fly at your head. Throw all good judgement out the window and offer toddler a french fry. Swallow words you don't want repeated as toddler refuses french fries as well.

Step 8: Attempt to redirect toddler's request for "wawa" {a.k.a. your lemonade} by holding out a juice box with a straw for her to drink. Experience total loss of sanity as toddler decides to grab the juice box from your hands and turn it into a fountain, showering the both of you (and the floor) in apple juice. {How is she so FAST?!?!}

Step 9: Switch places with husband, who has already finished his meal. Begin to eat your cold chicken sandwich at lightening speed, since your toddler is now making a scene. Try to tune out the chorus of crying children and enjoy the free meal you had been excited about. Realize this is impossible. Give up.

Step 10: Exit restaurant. Proceed through parking lot to car, whilst husband {who actually got to eat a hot meal} and toddler {who is out to refuse and/or sabotage all hot meals} laugh maniacally. {Ok, it's possible the maniacal laughter was simply normal laughter at some sort of cute toddler antic, but after a dinner like that, it seems like everyone's out to get you!}

Bonus Step: Toddler adds insult to injury by signing for "more" as soon as she's buckled into the carseat. Oh, you're hungry now?!?! Of course.

Restaurants: The most recent way God's testing my character. And my patience. Anyone else feel like hanging their head in defeat at the very thought of going out to eat?

Hey, that rhymed. :)

Sponsor Spotlight: Aidan...With EOS

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Fri, 25 May 2012 07:20:00 +0000

Meet Aidan. :)

I was lucky enough to meet Aidan's mommy, Caroline, almost two years ago in an online group for women having babies in January. That's right, Aidan was born right around the same time as Emmy. :)

But Aidan and his family have walked a different road than we've walked with Emily. Aidan had trouble eating early on, and a battery of doctors appointments and endless allergy tests finally resulted in a diagnosis for this brave little boy.

Aidan has an Eosinophilic Disorder. You can find Caroline's thorough description of this here. Right now, that means that Aidan is fed through a tube.

But, ever the mama bear, Caroline wants to make sure that the world, and Aidan, knows that that's not all that matters. Aidan is a bright, happy, lovable little boy, who brings so much joy to their lives! I mean, come on, how adorable is that sweet face?!? Aidan and his family are on a journey, and here at Finding Hope, I'm so grateful for Caroline's willingness to share that journey. Her blog, Aidan... With EOS, documents Aidan's life, educates the public about EOS, and provides an incredible wealth of resources for those dealing with this disorder.

Please welcome Caroline as Finding Hope's newest sponsor. I'd love it if you would head on over to her place and show her (and Aidan!) some love today!

Some Days, The Only Answer Is A Nap

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Thu, 24 May 2012 11:00:00 +0000

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. -Matthew 11:28

Today I am just tired.

Not the sleepy kind of tired, although I wouldn't refuse a nap by any means. It's more the full body kind of tired. Where you've been moving just ahead of the curve for a while, but you slow down for a second and it all seems to catch up with you. Overwhelm you. Exhaust you.

Some days, I'd like nothing more than to sleep for a week, just for a break.

And today, although my laundry is only half done and the dishwasher sits clean but not unloaded, I know I have to take a break.

When you are too tired to know why you're grumpy, it's time to rest.

Rest. I'll be the first to admit that sometimes I'd like to "rest" in the form of watching The Bachelorette, or wasting time on Facebook, or reading through my favorite blogs.

But that's not the kind of rest that feeds my soul. That fills me. In fact, sometimes the media is the very thing that is wearing me out.

No, I mean true rest.

Reading a book (not a digital one) I've been hoping to read...

Spending time journaling, or praying through the Word...

Taking an hour out of the afternoon and actually sleeping...

I'm sure it looks different for you. Maybe you're one of those strange humans called "extroverts" that get rest from interacting with others. I will never understand you, but I totally respect that. :) Maybe you're artistic and need to paint or draw or capture beauty on film in order for you to find rest. Maybe you're like me and you just need a time-out all by yourself, so you can return to life all filled up and ready to go again.

The Lord's made us each with different versions of rest. But His command for us to actually find rest is one and the same for all. We were not made to keep going and going and going. Even Jesus didn't do that. And do you really think you have more important things to do than Jesus did? Come on, now. ;)

I just want to encourage you today that it's ok to take a break. To take care of yourself so that you can be ready to serve others wholeheartedly. Make sure you're seeking the Lord for the ways He's geared you to find rest, but please, find it. Embrace it.

I think I'll take that nap now. :)

What's your favorite way to find rest? What's holding you back from doing that very thing?

Not Alone

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Wed, 23 May 2012 11:00:00 +0000

There's this song we've been singing in church lately.

I end up crying every time.

It talks about stopping, looking back, and reflecting on the journey you've taken. A journey that you maybe felt like you walked alone. A journey riddled with struggles, a journey that left you with scars. But you made it through. And on the other side, you can look back and clearly see that you weren't nearly as alone as you felt.

Every time we sing it, I cry. I cry because I know what it's like to feel like you're walking an impossible road all alone. I cry because I know the relief of finally reaching the end of that road.

I cry because looking back brings an overwhelming mixture of gratefulness and regret.

I am so grateful for the fact that the Lord has brought me through the difficult things I've encountered.

I am so sorry that I kept my eyes fixed on the tragedies around me instead of on the One who was with me. Looking around instead of up caused me to isolate myself and forget that He was there. That He cared.

That He loved me.

The truth is that God IS faithful. Even when life seems to prove otherwise. He's not limited by situations.

And looking back now, I can see how He's carried me. I can see where He's orchestrated miracles. I can see His faithfulness, woven throughout my story.

I was never alone. Never once.

Neither are you.

I Have A Secret

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Tue, 22 May 2012 15:03:00 +0000

There's something I haven't told you.

But it's not you. It's me.

I've been telling myself that I'm not saying anything to anyone because there's no sense in talking about it until it's finished. And it's not really anyone's business. Plus, I'm an introvert and some things I like to keep to myself. I'm pretty open on this blog, but {believe it or not} I don't talk about everything. :)

And then this morning I received a newsletter in my inbox from one of my favorite bloggers. And she talked about motivation, and asking yourself if you're being driven by fear or by love when you do certain things. And I knew right then.

I'm simply not saying anything out of fear. I'm afraid. This seems bigger than me and I'm not convinced I can do it. And the truth of the matter is that I don't want everyone to know if I fail. I'd like the ability to fail in private please.

But that's fear. And I really don't want to be driven by fear. I'd like to be driven by love. And love is without fear. So here it is. Laugh if you want. :)

I'm working on writing a book.

Are you still there? It seems like a big dream, I know. And maybe it's just me, but saying it out loud makes me feel like everyone will have something to say about why I shouldn't, or laugh that I'm trying, or remind me that book production is way down and publishing is getting even more selective. And maybe you'll remind me that this blog is small and my platform is not as wide-reaching as it needs to be in order to float a book proposal. And maybe you'll ask me why I'm doing it at all.

Those things go through my head every time I sit down to write. I know all the reasons not to write. I know I'm just a blogger, and who would want to read a book I write? I don't know.

So now that all of my insecurities are laid out in front of you, I guess I should tell you why I'm doing it, right? :)

I've always wanted to write a book. I love to write. But I've never had a good grasp on a topic for a book. I'm not a good fiction writer. All I can write about is what I know. Real life stuff. I do my best writing out of connecting real life to our Real God, and being honest about it. And I've never felt like I had enough of any one topic to write about. So I put it out of my mind and have really enjoyed blogging and getting to know you all!

But in February, right around the 5th anniversary of my mom's death, I felt like the Lord sort of opened the door for me. And He connected some hurts in my life in a way that gave me a vision for what He would like me to write about. A book that shares my own story, acknowledging that life is hard and pain is plentiful. A book that clearly lays out the truth of who God is, and the truth of who He says we are, in spite of life's circumstances. A book that serves as a reminder of what we can hold onto when life gets rough. It's the first time in my life that I can actually see a book from beginning to end.

So, I'm writing. And I'm writing in a hurry. :) Because in July, I'm going to this writing conference, where I'll be presenting a book proposal.

Did I mention that I'm super excited to get to go with my friend Elizabeth?!?!?!

And I'm absolutely terrified. The "what-ifs" are running rampant through my head. Every day.

I'm also excited. Because when you're doing something that you know God's asked you to do, obedience is joyful. And because I wish I had had a book like this when I was going through the darkest parts of my life. I handled them poorly, and it's taken me years to recover. I have a tiny little hope that a book like this might make the difference for someone else.

But even if it never gets seen, and publishers throw it back in my face and laugh, I'm glad that I'm writing it. Don't get me wrong, I'll go cry in a corner and down a carton of Ben and Jerry's, but I'm still glad I'm writing it. Because it's healing me. Writing has a way of forcing you to face and process issues that you've avoided, and writing for others has a way of forcing you to tell the truth, instead of allowing you to continue believing the lies that have made their home in your head. It's healing me. He's healing me.

Still, I'd like to ask for your prayers as I write, and as I attend the conference the summer. Pray that I'd have focus and write His words, not my own. Pray that I would be bold and not afraid. Pray that they won't laugh at me. :)

Thanks friends. I {heart} you.

Is there something in your life that God's asked you to do that terrifies you? I'd love to pray for you too!

Takin' Care of Business

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Mon, 21 May 2012 12:00:00 +0000

Ok friends, here's the deal.

This blog is growing every day, and I'm so very excited about that! I am so grateful that you read and share and engage with me. I hope this place is as much of a blessing for you as it is for me. I {heart} you guys. :)

On that note, I'm excited about you fellow bloggers, and those of you with your own businesses {etsy or otherwise}!! And I'd love to help you out. One great way to pass on the word about your blog or business, and increase your traffic, is to advertise on another blog! It's one BIG way that I've been blessed by some of YOU. :) So, starting in June, I'm going to be a little more structured with this whole ad/sponsor thing. I'll have a limited number of ads available in my sidebar, which will allow your buttons to really stand out. I'll also have three sizes of ads to choose from, with options to purchase per month or per quarter. So here's what I'm offering as advertising options in the month of June:

300 x 200 Ad Size: 2 Spots

{300x200: $15 per month or $40 per quarter}

300 x 100 Ad Size: 4 Spots

{300x100: $10 per month or $25 per quarter}

150 x 150 Ad Size: 8 Spots

{150x150: $5 per month or $12 per quarter}

In addition to your advertisement in the sidebar, I'll be writing up a monthly "Sponsor Spotlight" to showcase your blog or business! And specifically for you business-owners, you'll have the option to promote your products through a giveaway right here on Finding Hope.

You can check out my current statistics, advertising details and guidelines here. If you're interested in pursuing an advertising opportunity, send an email to kayse@finding-hope.com! Ads will be sold on a first come, first served basis.

Additionally, if you're not ready to advertise, but are interested in promoting your product through a posted review and giveaway, let me know! I'm looking for 4 unique products to give away in June.

I'm really looking forward to working with you, and helping you to grow your blog or business! Can't wait to hear from you. :) I look forward to working with you!

Meal Planning Monday

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Mon, 21 May 2012 03:38:00 +0000

Iiiiiiiiiiit's Monday!! And that means meal planning! We are trying to spend absolutely zero dollars eating out this week (it's a habit we need to get out of!), so I'm motivated to make sure everything is planned out in advance. Luckily, lunches are easy, since our freezer is full of the bazillion that I cooked last Tuesday.
MondayPizza Pasta{Pizza sauce, ground turkey, peppers, onions, and pasta} TuesdayChicken Caesar Salad
WednesdayQuesadillas with Ground Turkey
ThursdayBreakfast for Dinner
FridayChicken and Potatoes on the Grill
SaturdaySpaghetti, Salad, and Garlic Bread
SundayChicken Parmesan Meatloaf
LunchesPB&JTurkey BurritosPaninisHomemade Pizza PocketsLeftovers
SnacksYogurtFruitString CheeseGranola BarsWater :)
Now it's your turn! Link up your own Meal Plan or your Favorite Recipe. Here's how it works. Every Monday, I'll post my meal plan, and Kelli will post hers. Each Meal Planning Monday will be a link up, so we can all share recipes, tips, and meal planning ideas! We only ask that you do two things in order to participate:1. Follow Finding Hope on GFC and The How To Mommy on Bloglovin'.2. Grab our button code from the box below and include our button somewhere in your post!

Rest

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Sun, 20 May 2012 13:58:00 +0000

My prayer for you today is that you will find rest on this Sabbath. Put down your phones and your computers, turn off the TV, and enjoy true rest.

Be filled with the word of God,

be present with your family,

be aware of the important things.

May you find rest today. And be filled.

Toddlers Are Multi-Faceted. I Promise.

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Sat, 19 May 2012 10:00:00 +0000

Happy Saturday, folks! Today, I'd like to introduce you to the many faces of my toddler. :)

We'll start with what I like to call "The Life Cycle Of A Tantrum"

Cool girl sporting her sunglasses.

Glasses begin to fall off... and Emily can't put them back on by herself... so...

Tantrum ensues. Phase 1: Throw self on ground in utter despair.

Phase 2: Flail about madly, kicking and screaming. Sunglasses are just so frustrating.

Phase 3: Continue kicking and screaming, at full force. Make mommy wish she had earplugs.

Phase 4: Sit up. Realize kicking and screaming does not fix the sunglasses situation.

Phase 5: Approach Mommy. Wear pitiful look.

Phase 6: Humbly ask Mommy for "hep".

Phase 7 {Final Phase}: Return to playing, a little more somberly.

But don't worry. She's not all about the sunglasses and tantrums. :)

Here's a peek into the morning time around our house.

Emily comes downstairs for her morning waffle with her friends. Bear 1 and Bear 2. Yes, she calls them both "Bear". "Seahorse" isn't really in your average 16-month-old's vocabulary...

Emily eats her waffle, simultaneously hugging both Bears. She WILL. NOT. LET. GO! :)

Ah... Waffle, Bear, and Bear. Life is good. :)

And, finally, the cutest winking toddler you've ever seen. Oh my gosh. This kills me every time. :)

So there you go. The many faces of Emily, for your weekend enjoyment. :)
*Thank you for indulging my compulsion to share my child with you all. I realize you may not find her antics quite as entertaining as I do, but I appreciate you humoring me. I sure do love this girl!!*

Perspective

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Fri, 18 May 2012 13:29:00 +0000

The last two weeks have been hard on our marriage.

Two people on different pages, not for any specific reason but just because life got in the way.

Life has been hard on our marriage.

And Monday night, in one of those at-your-wits-end arguments, we threw in the towel.

Not at each other. Not at our marriage. But at the way we'd been doing it.

It just wasn't working. We'd been looking out for ourselves and not considering the other. And after a couple of weeks of that, you start to become overtaken by bitterness and anger and frustration at the way the other person keeps failing. You try to fight for yourself and it feels like beating your head against a brick wall.

You don't get anywhere.

We weren't getting anywhere.

So, right there, in the kitchen, we made a decision. We changed our perspective.

Sometimes, that's all that's left to do.

Maybe it sounds simple. Maybe that's because it is. But we decided to try and outlove each other. For one week.

No judgments. No criticism. Just loving and encouraging the other person. For one week. And then if there were issues, we could talk about them at the week's end.

But somehow, in the last few days of really trying to love one another, all judgements aside, the issues seem to have vanished. And we are smiling again.

Funny. Perspective can make all the difference. Do you need to change yours?

*I'm linking up with Lisa-Jo for 5 minute Fridays, where we write for 5 minutes flat on the given topic. Will you join us?

Freezer Cooking: 7 Hours, 112 Meals!!

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Thu, 17 May 2012 15:18:00 +0000

I have always wanted to try that whole Once-A-Month cooking thing. It sounds awesome to me. Cook for one day and have meals for a month? Yes, please!!!

But, um, what do I make? And what do I need at the grocery store? And how does that not cost me an arm and a leg and my sanity?

And then Crystal over at Money Saving Mom (if you're not already following her blog, go. Do it. Right now.) has been doing a series of posts on freezer cooking - one week to fill your freezer with breakfast foods, another week to fill your freezer with lunches, and another week to fill your freezer with dinners. Cook one meal a day for the freezer, don't get overwhelmed, and have tons of food ready to go. She even provides the shopping list. Score!

However, sometimes when I get excited about something, I want to do everything THAT DAY. So instead of following her advice to spend a week cooking lunches for the freezer, I did it all in one day.

Let's just say there's a reason Crystal suggests spreading it out. Ahem.

Anyway, my friend Bethany came over for what was SUPPOSED to be a day of relaxation after the two crazy weeks that we had both had, and instead I turned it into an intensive work day.

Oops.

But now we both have stocked freezers, and we don't have to make lunches for our men every day. And that's pretty awesome. Actually, it's super awesome. I love it! And the best part?

It only cost each of us $55. That comes out to $1.01 per lunch, thankyouverymuch. That is WAY cheaper than the $2.50 I spend on Lean Cuisines when they are on sale, AND these lunches are much healthier and less processed. Yippee!!

So here's how we did it...

First we made lots of dough...

...and pizza filling...

...to create some pizza pockets!

We also filled some with Ham and Cheese (instead of pizza stuff), and baked those too!

And we got a ton of these lovely (and yummy!) beauties!!

Then we (I mean, Bethany) made a bazillion peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

She also diced a few peppers and onions while I ran to Target to get some things I had forgotten (oops...)

We added the peppers and onions to the seasoned ground turkey, for burrito filling!

We filled and wrapped all of these burritos. Plus about 15 more that we filled with green chile chicken (from the crockpot) and rice and cheese. Yum...

The girls slept for most of the day, but played happily while they were awake! Super fun for all four of us ladies to be in the kitchen. :) Thank goodness we have some space in there!

We turned my rather clean kitchen into an absolute disaster, but with good reason!

And using leftover ingredients, we even made ourselves dinner - the best White Chicken Enchilada recipe ever. EVER.

We labeled each bag of food with the item inside and reheating instructions.

And ended up with...

15 Pizza Pockets

10 Ham and Cheese Pockets

25 PB&J Sandwiches

15 Turkey Burritos

15 Chicken Burritos

32 Cinnamon Rolls (we only made half a batch)

And White Chicken Enchiladas for dinner.

All for $110 total ($55 per person).

I am quite proud of us. :) I would totally do it again. It's way worth the money and the time. Except next time, I need to really rest up first.

Because we also ended up with achy backs, sore feet, cranky babies, and pure exhaustion.

I think it's safe to say I still owe Bethany a day of relaxation, don't you think? ;)

Have you ever tried freezer cooking a bunch of stuff in one day? What's your experience been??

You. You're Pretty Great.

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Wed, 16 May 2012 03:26:00 +0000

I have been overwhelmed by how many people responded to my last minute invitation last week. :)

Honestly, I thought maybe only two or three of you would be interested in committing to a Bible Study for 14 weeks. Much less a Bible Study with me!!

But 22 of you have joined me! (What?!?!) And we've been having so much fun. :)

We're going through Proverbs 31 and already I'm loving the study and the e-book from Women Living Well. But more than anything, I'm loving the comments and the discussion between the women. I've been doing my Bible study by myself for the last few months, and it's just a blessing to be able to engage in community that's all studying the same things. It's neat to be able to bounce ideas off of one another and learn from each other.

So thanks, those of you who have joined me! I'm having so much fun getting to know you. :) And the rest of you, don't worry, I'll be sharing plenty on here too. :)

Because whether or not you're in the study with me, we're all part of a community here. And I'm so grateful for that. Many of you have started commenting more lately, and I feel like I'm getting a chance to "meet" you. :) Which is so much fun!! It's one thing to write everyday and send my thoughts off into cyberspace. It's another to remember that people are reading them, and to hear that they are enjoyed.

It's humbling for an ordinary girl like me to hear that my words (His words) have meant something to you. And it's even more humbling to invite people over (internet-ally speaking) and have them respond with such enthusiasm.

So this is me, saying thanks for reading. Thanks for sharing life with me. Thanks for being more of an encouragement than you know. You're awesome.

And next session, I hope you join our Bible Study. It's pretty stinkin' cool. :)

I'm A Slow Learner

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Tue, 15 May 2012 11:30:00 +0000

On Sunday I wrote about my feelings on Mother's Day here. It was no secret that I was not really looking forward to the day, despite having some fabulous women to celebrate. I just wasn't feeling it, struggling to get out of the pit of wishing things were different.

But we had a wonderful breakfast with my family {where Emily learned how to *wink*, which is the most hilarious thing I've EVER seen!}, and church was great. I even got a few flowers. :) All three of us spent most of the afternoon relaxing and napping. All in all, not a bad day.

Except for two things. Two things could have thrown me into a tailspin. Two things could have had me melting down in the courtyard at church, or on the way home from the hospital.

After church, a sweet friend let me know that a family member has been diagnosed with cancer. Pancreatic Cancer. Stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer. The same kind my mom had. And so I talked with her about chemo and time left and how fast it happened for my mom. And I traveled to that place where sharing with another brings both healing and stabbing pain.

And then, after our naps, we got word that a family member had been hospitalized. It seems as though everything is just fine {praise God!}, but, of course, we went to the hospital to visit and show support and love. So on Mother's Day, I found myself on the way to a place that reminds me only of sickness and death.

On the way, I was thinking and praying. It was Mother's Day, and I had been thrown into a conversation about the perils of Pancreatic Cancer, and was on my way to spend some time at a hospital. And on the way to the hospital, we dropped Emily off at my dad's house, which is at the cemetery where my mom is buried.

Oh, the irony.

And as I was mulling over these things with God, I realized something.

Instead of sinking further into sadness that day, the irony almost made me laugh.

Not because the situations were funny. They weren't. But they were just situations. True to life situations.

In life, things happen. People get sick, people die. Maybe that sounds harsh, but it is just the truth. This world is not perfect. We can't expect it to be. It's riddled with sin and death and the messiness of life.

But my situation does not determine who God is. Or how He loves me. Or how He loves YOU.

I know now that I didn't have a right understanding of God or of life when I lost my mom. I was too focused on my situations, my circumstances, and I interpreted those to be telling of how much God loved me. Of what kind of God He was.

That is such a lie.

My God is God no matter what. He knows what I face each day and stands with me because He loves me. He knows this world is tragic, but He has overcome it. And through each trial, He wants me to turn to Him, lean on Him, walk with Him.

Every difficult circumstance is an opportunity to grow closer to the One who saves me. Every hard situation is a chance to learn more about the One who made me.

My view of my Lord is being righted. I'm a slow learner, what can I say? :) And in the midst of grieving my own loss and the losses {previous or pending} of others, I am learning to stand on the Rock that isn't shaken.

Perhaps this is what Paul was talking about when he told us to "count it all as joy". Maybe I'm not quite to the "joy" part yet, but the peace that surpasses all understanding is pretty close.

What do you need prayer for today? What circumstances have caused you to question who God is? I would be honored to cover you in prayer this week. Please share in the comments below.

This post will be linked with Time Warp Wife and Thankful Homemaker.

Meal Planning Monday

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Mon, 14 May 2012 13:14:00 +0000

Happy Monday, friends! Welcome back to Meal Planning Monday! As always, my goal this week is to eat healthier than last week. And for me, that mens that today requires grocery shopping. :) Gotta get that fridge and pantry stocked with some healthy options!
MondayChicken Spaghetti and Homemade Garlic Bread, plus some kind of steamed veggies.{Thank you freezer stash!} TuesdayChicken Salad{Made with marinated chicken and fresh veggies}
WednesdayGreen Chile Chicken Tacos
ThursdayLettuce Wraps with ground turkey
FridayHomemade Veggie Pizza
SaturdayTurkey Burgers
SundayVeggie Omelettes{Breakfast for Dinner}
LunchesTurkey SandwichesPB&JTuna or Chicken SaladPaninisLean CuisineLeftovers
SnacksYogurtFruitString CheeseGranola BarsWater :)
Now it's your turn! Link up your own Meal Plan or your Favorite Recipe. Here's how it works. Every Monday, I'll post my meal plan, and Kelli will post hers. Each Meal Planning Monday will be a link up, so we can all share recipes, tips, and meal planning ideas! We only ask that you do two things in order to participate:1. Follow Finding Hope on GFC and The How To Mommy on Bloglovin'.2. Grab our button code from the box below and include our button somewhere in your post!

**Linking up today with The Better Mom and Modest Mom Blog!!

Because Sometimes Mother's Day Stinks.

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Sun, 13 May 2012 04:55:00 +0000

Is it Mothers Day or Mother's Day?? I can never decide. I think the apostrophe is necessary, so I'm going with that.

Two years ago, Mother's Day was pretty great. That was the day we told our families we were pregnant.

Last year, Mother's Day was also pretty awesome. It was my first as a mommy.

This year...sigh. I'm having a hard time. It's not my first as a mommy. It's doesn't carry with it a big happy announcement. It's just Sunday, dedicated to moms.

And this year, without anything extra to soften the blow, it just reminds me that mine is gone.

It is strange, celebrating Mother's Day and remembering that the day includes me now too. I'm a mom. Have been for a while now. But Mother's Day to me will always be about MY mom. It matters much less to me that I get to be celebrated as it does that she, who was worth celebrating, is not here to enjoy it.

I'm sure that Mother's Day in heaven includes food that is better than Sunday Brunch at Mimi's (and that's saying something), but still, it is too far away for me. I'd rather my momma be here, eating at Flappy Jacks with me tomorrow morning. Then we'd get to do this mom thing together. That would be weird. But in the really amazing kind of way.

So today, although I am blessed beyond measure to be a mommy myself {because have you seen my little stinker? She is cuuuuuute!}, today my heart goes out to all of you motherless daughters. You who will both smile and ache tomorrow. I know your pain. And I want you to know it's ok to be sad this weekend, even if people don't understand why. It doesn't matter how long it's been. I get it.

I'm going to try, and I hope you do too, to focus on the blessings instead of the losses. Like the fact that I know how to be a mom because mine was such a great one. Some people never have that. Or the fact that motherhood is truly the best gift I've ever been given, and I love my sweet girl to pieces. It's hard to stay sad when her smile is directed my way. :)

Just know I {heart} you, wherever you are, if you're missing your mommy an extra bit this weekend. And I want you to go read this blog post and see that there are others who share in your suffering. Somehow, together, the burden is a little lighter.

Love to you, my sweet friends. May you celebrate motherhood and your momma. If yours is still around, give her an extra tight squeeze. You're a lucky girl. :)

Procrastinate Much?

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Sat, 12 May 2012 15:18:00 +0000

Be honest. Have you gotten your mom a Mother's Day gift yet?

It's tomorrow, you know.

I ordered a secret surprise for all of the moms in my life a few weeks ago. It's pretty awesome. I think they will like it. But I can't tell you what it is, cause, well, they read this blog. :)

So instead, I'll tell you about what I asked my husband for, as my Mother's Day gift.

Click here to view more details

Mother Letters. :) It's really the coolest e-book {you can get it as a PDF, on your kindle, or on your nook} you've ever seen, if you're a mommy. Seth and Amber Haines put together this collection of letters from mothers to mothers, encouraging one another, admonishing one another, and sharing in the messiness of motherhood together. Actually, this started out as a Christmas gift from Seth to Amber. At one difficult point in her motherhood journey, Seth asked a bunch of Amber's mommy friends (both online and off) to write her a letter. They did, and this project turned into so much more than a Christmas gift. It became a gift that they needed to share with the world, full of the powers that true words carry.

I've started reading this book {Squee! was giving a few away to bloggers for free!! So they beat my hubby to it.}, and I have to tell you, it really is powerful. It makes you laugh and cry and relate and it fills you with the sense of the community of motherhood. And when dishes and diapers and dinner and detergent try to hold you hostage in your own home, community is a blessing.

So I'd encourage you to go {right now!} and order this for your own mom. As a thank you for all she's done for you. Or go order it for yourself, cause you need to read this too. :) Believe me, you do. And it's only $6.99, which is cheaper than most books, or two drinks at Starbucks.

Happy almost Mother's Day. :) See you tomorrow for the real one!

********************************************************************

Eight awesome ladies have already signed up to study Proverbs 31 together this summer! Will you be #9? Check out this post for details, email me, and join us! The study starts this Monday!

*Disclosure: Affiliate links used above. All opinions are honest and my own.

Are You Up For A Challenge?

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Fri, 11 May 2012 06:08:00 +0000

Let's talk quiet times.

Yes, again.

But you'll be glad we did. I promise. :)

I know I've probably talked your ears off {written your eyes out?} about how vital a daily morning quiet time is. That time with the Lord fuels you for the day, and sets your perspective in such a way that you can handle the challenges that will inevitably come. I've also been honest with you and let you know that I've struggled with being consistent in these times. Maybe you're in the same boat.

For a few seasons last year, I joined Bible Study groups with the Hello Mornings Challenge. It was great, and I really love the way the women there encourage one another. I have only good things to say about that challenge!

Over the last few weeks though, I've found another morning challenge that seems really awesome too. Good Morning Girls is starting their summer session on Monday, May 14th. And they are studying Proverbs 31 and the attributes of the woman described in that chapter. And that has me pretty excited. :) So, I've signed up, but so far I've signed up alone. Which is no big deal, cause I've been doing my Bible Study on my own for quite a while.

But then I had this idea. It would be so neat to study God's definition of an excellent woman with...well...other women. Accountability is so important, and sharing what we're learning only helps us to sharpen each other. And then I thought how it would be SO neat to study this with some women I'd like to get to know better. And that's when I thought of you.

Yes, you. :)

There are 175 of you brave enough to stake the claim that you regularly read this blog. And maybe some more who read quietly and are still deciding whether or not they feel at home here. I am so grateful for you all. But I hate that I don't know you better. I would really like to know you better.

So, I'm inviting you over. Not to my house, because it is much too small. But over to my little internet space, where we can study God's word together and challenge each other and share life and prayer requests. I'm inviting you to join me over the summer and work through the Good Morning Girls Bible Study with me. What do you think?

I know it's totally last minute, but I thought I would just take the plunge. I'm sort of a last minute kinda gal anyways. :) So here are the details...

Here's the Good Morning Girls website - you can check out what they're all about and get the scoop on the summer study.

Here's the link to the study we'll be going through - you can check out the Proverbs 31 e-book as well as the reading guide. Both are free to download.

The study runs May 14th - August 17th {3 months} and requires your best effort for a consistent daily quiet time, whenever it fits into your day best. {Obviously perfection is not the goal or expectation here. Or I would have to exclude myself. What I'm hoping for is a group that will encourage each other in our successes and failures, and point each other to Christ.}

IF you decide you'd like to join me for this study this summer, send me an email to kayse@finding-hope.com with:

Your name

Your email address

Your Facebook name and Twitter handle (if you have those)

I will be so excited to have you. I'll then figure out which forum we'll use (email, Facebook, Twitter) to keep in touch, and send you out all the details. {Right now I'm leaning towards a FB group, since I know how to create and use those, but we'll see what everyone thinks.} Please try to let me know if you'd like to be a part of the study by Sunday night (5/13), so I can have the group ready to go on Monday morning. I know this is late notice, and we have like three days, but hey, let's see what happens!

I don't care if only 1 of you signs up or all 175. :) I'm really excited to study God's word with you, and get to know you better!!

So. The ball is in your court. Will you join me?!?!? Please pray about it and then let me know!

Will You Dance With Me?!?!

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Wed, 09 May 2012 15:03:00 +0000

I'm doing the happy dance today. Wanna know why?

Well, I'll tell you.

Jon's semester is over!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wanna dance around with me?!?!?!

We are officially done with his first year of grad school. 1/3rd of the way done with everything. And I am so relieved.

This year has been tough. He's been working 3 jobs while going to school full time. I've been teaching full time and trying to keep up with the house and cooking. Oh, and raising our kiddo. :) I'm blessed to be able to teach from home and spend every day with her, but still, this year has been trying.

This week has already been beautiful. :)

Jon goes to work, comes home, and doesn't have to study. What?!?! We get to spend time together?!?! Yippee!! It's been great. AND he's been helping out with Emily, so that I can get my work done in a timely manner, which means we get even more time to spend together. Score!

In a month, he'll be starting some summer classes, but we're going to enjoy this month off. :) And when the next school year starts, we're going to make some changes.

Less work, better budgeting, for one. Jon working 7 days a week is so generous of him, but we've realized it isn't good for anybody. And financially, it's not absolutely necessary right now. I need him at home more than we need the money. For my own sanity. And we can find other ways to cut.

So he'll be cutting back at work at least one day a week, which will give him more time to study and give us more time together. It's still going to be a tough season, but it doesn't have to be impossible!

We'll also be cutting back in our spending. We live on a pretty tight budget as is, as we're trying to work toward some financial goals, but we're going to work to find other ways to cut, if we can. And I think I just found one awesome way, so I'm going to share it with you.

Every semester, Jon has to spend at least $200 on textbooks. This makes me grimace, but it has to be done. It's just frustrating, because while some of the books are worth keeping long-term, others are not. So it's like you're buying in for just one semester, and then selling them back at a huge loss. Not worth it.

So for this upcoming semester, we're thinking of using Campus Book Rentals for the books that Jon is not interested in keeping. This company is fabulous, renting books at a fraction of the cost of buying them. I love that this is an option! And the best part is that CBR donates 35-45% of each book rental to Operation Smile, an international medical children's charity that donates corrective surgeries to children with cleft palates. So if a book on their website costs $50, around $20 of that goes straight to Operation Smile. And I feel great about using our money in that way!

Plus, we'll be saving a bunch of money. Here's a book that Jon had to use this last semester. We bought it on Amazon for the $42 that it's listed at right now. Had we rented it through Campus Book Rentals, we would have paid only $18.24. Um, that's like putting $24 back in our pocket. Which we could totally use. AND, over $6 would have been donated to Operation Smile. Better deal, altogether? I think so.

So, I just thought I'd give you a heads up, if you're about to embark on a new semester, like we are. :) I hope you are most definitely enjoying the break between classes though! We definitely will be. {In fact, Jon's got a secret trip planned for me as soon as my school year is over. Eek! What could it be?!?!}

*Disclosure: Sponsored links used above. However, all opinions are my own.

My Famous Chicken Chili

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Tue, 08 May 2012 10:00:00 +0000

Ok, so it's only famous if you know me, and then because it's the only one I make. But still. It's awesome.

I use ground chicken (thank you, Fresh and Easy!) since it's MUCH healthier, and in chili you really can't tell the difference. I also don't use beans, cause...well...ew. We are not bean fans in this house.

Also, I usually make this in the crock pot. But, of course, the time I planned to take pictures is the time I forgot to prep everything with enough time to do the whole crock pot thing. Sigh. But it works just as well in a regular old pot, so there you go.

Ingredients

1lb Ground Chicken

28oz Crushed Tomatoes

14oz Diced Tomatoes

1 Onion, Chopped

Enough Chili Powder, Cumin, and Garlic Powder to taste. Or just a pack of chili seasoning.

A dash of Red Pepper Flakes

Directions

1. Brown chicken in a skillet. Drain.

2. Chop onion.

3. Dump all ingredients into Crock Pot. Cook for 4 hours on low.

3. Dump all ingredients into pot on Medium/High heat. Stir until warmed throughout.

4. Serve hot, topped with cheese and sour cream. Yum!

Did I bombard you with enough pictures of chili to make you sufficiently hungry? Good. Go make some chili. It's still good in the summer {I guess it's technically still spring, but it sure doesn't feel like it here!}. I promise. :)

Enjoy!

{Linking up this recipe with Made by You Monday, Tasty Tuesday, Tuesdays at the Table, Tempt My Tummy Tuesday, 33 Shades of Green}

A Faithful God and Answered Prayer

noreply@blogger.com (Finding Hope) — Mon, 07 May 2012 17:01:00 +0000

We're taking a little break from Meal Planning Monday this week, because I have something more important to share with you.

It's stories like this that wrench your heart and keep you in limbo for a while. Wondering about life and praying and praying and praying while trying to sort out God's plan versus what you think should happen.

A while back I shared with you about some friends who were trying to adopt. Their journey is a long one, as they have been trying to become parents for years and years. First through multiple rounds of infertility treatments that lasted for as many years as they'd been trying to have kids. Nothing worked. My dear friend Sonia, who is already more of a mother than many of the moms I know, had to sit back and watch as friend after friend got pregnant, gave birth, and entered the world of mommyhood. And as heartbreaking as it must have been, she handled it with a special measure of grace and dignity, loving our kids as if they were her own, celebrating with us when we had reason to celebrate, and showing up when things were hard. When Emily was in the NICU, Sonia came, almost every day. She brought us food and clothes and sat with me and cried with me. And once Emmy came home, Sonia loved on her like she was her very own girl. She and my baby have such a special bond, and I love that.

But watching her with my girl also made me ache for her. Because when you have it in you to be a mommy, and that dream keeps evading you, it is tough to keep hoping. Tough to stay positive. Tough to be patient. But Sonia did all of those things. With grace.

So three months ago, when I got the call that she and her husband had been matched with adoptive parents, you can imagine the joy. :) She had more baby showers than I could count, and they were all well-deserved. This was a long awaited child! One who had been prayed for by hundreds of people, all of whom were more than ready to celebrate with Sonia and Scott. :) So showered with gifts they were, and it was beautiful.

Scott, who is away at school right now, came home two weeks ago on his break. It was perfect timing, as the birth mom was due that week. They prepped the nursery, cleaned their house from top to bottom, and waited for that baby to arrive.

But, as many first babies do, she did not arrive on time. So Scott had to return to school, and Sonia stayed, waiting.

Last Wednesday, the birth mom was induced, and on Thursday, that precious baby girl was born. The one who had been prayed for, hoped for, dreamed of. She was here. Finally! We all rejoiced with Sonia and Scott, so excited for our friends who finally had the baby that would officially make them what their hearts had always been - parents.

Sweet Baby Girl, all ready for newborn photos.

And then some complications arose. Giving up a baby is an impossible things to do, for any woman, but especially for a 15-year-old, overcome by exhaustion from giving birth and hormones that she hadn't experienced before. So although Sonia was at the hospital, and got to hold the baby a few times, she was not given the child. The baby stayed with the birth mom through the night, and my friend waited patiently as the girl held the baby, called her a name that was not the one that Sonia and Scott had chosen, and asked for more and more time with her.

You can imagine the fear that arose. Would she change her mind? Would Sonia have to leave the hospital empty handed, returning home to a nursery that had been ready to welcome home baby girl? Sonia kept us updated and we all prayed. I asked you to pray. I'm pretty sure heaven was filled with prayers for this sweet baby that day.

And the next. On the day that Sonia was supposed to be able to take baby girl home, the birth mom requested another night with her. Sonia had had the baby with her all afternoon, dressing her in a special outfit for newborn pictures, and prepping the car seat. Waiting just for papers to be signed so she could take her daughter home, relieved that things were working out. I had been able to visit, and hold the sweet girl. She was perfect, so calm and content, with one adorable dimple on her right cheek. But within hours, the baby was taken from Sonia, again, and placed back with the birth mom, for another night in the hospital. Sonia and her mom had to leave as well, to make room for pregnant women who were having their own babies. So they retreated to a hotel room and waited some more.

Saturday morning, they returned to the hospital bright and early, ready to take that baby home. But that was not the case. The baby stayed with the birth mom, and Sonia and her mom camped out in the waiting room, watching infomercials on Zumba and airbrushed makeup. The social worker came and went. Lunchtime came and went. And still they had no word on the status of the situation. No idea if Sonia was going to get to take that baby home. It was not looking good, and the long wait made it seem as if the birth mom was changing her mind again.

But finally, around 4pm, Sonia texted me this photo of a beautiful baby girl, all decked out in her going home outfit, with a message that said "Guess who is going home?!?!?!?!!!!!" And I am overjoyed to announce to you that Miss Everly Gray is now at home with her mommy, meeting all of the people who prayed for her, and enjoying the love that is being showered on this long-awaited child.

Miss Everly Gray, because they waited for her forEVER, and because she turned their GRAY skies blue. :)

God is faithful, friends. This situation could have turned out either way, but I am so grateful that His plan was for Everly to come home with Sonia. I can't imagine how hard this must have been for that young birth mom, being faced with the decision of whether to keep or give up your child, at only 15 years old. My heart breaks for her. And I can't believe how sensitive Sonia was to the needs of this young girl. But from the beginning, we had a sense that it was this child we'd been praying for. Sonia knew her name right away, and it wasn't one she had considered in the past. Things fell into place so well that it could only have been the hand of God. And so our prayers for them, as they struggled through this time of waiting and indecision, were focused on the things we had already heard from God, praying that His will would be done, and {if I'm honest} that His will would be for this baby to go home with Sonia. Home to Scott. To a family who had prepared and waited and prayed for the very baby they were still waiting and praying for.

And He allowed it. I am so grateful, and I know Scott and Sonia are even more so. Papers still need to be signed, but this is a giant step in the right direction. I just wanted to share with you how praiseworthy out God is. :) How He's had his hand in the life of this little girl since before she was born.

I also want to ask for your continued prayers. That the adoption process would move forward smoothly, and that the birth mom would find peace. Pray for her heart, that the Lord would comfort her and hold her close.

Thanks friends. :) Thanks for your prayers and your willingness to lift up a stranger and her child. I am so grateful for you!

Mother and Daughter, finally. :)