Beer + Football = Fitbaw!

Ringers

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Wed, 22 Feb 2012 09:16:37 PST

Missing this week are:

Jon
Si
Alan
Martie
Stuart
Kyle
Iain

Filling in are:

Robert
Grant
SEPA Stephen
Andy (played once before - works at IDOX)
Graeme (never played before for us but plays a couple of times a week elsewhere - works at IDOX)

So the squad is:

Ross
Steven
Scott (might be 10-15 minutes late)
Paul
Neil
Robert
Grant
SEPA Stephen
IDOX Andy
IDOX Graeme

It's late and I've not had a chance to even think who can be captains. I'm sure you can sort it out on the pitch. Have a good game.

Don't call it a comeback...

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 01:13:33 PST

... he's been here for years! Thanks to Foxy for playing last night and showing that there's life in the old dog yet!

Looking at the teams before hand, I thought that with Kyle, Ross and Robert all in the one team, they had the advantage on paper. However, I think the Tatties all just played really well individually and as a team where as the Mince didn't seem to gel and individual players didn't play as well as they have been in recent weeks. C'est le vie!

Next week Stu's still away golfing, Kyle's foot's not looking good, Si's injured but Neil's back and Alan may even make a return. That means there's definitely one spot open (Robert?) and probably another one (Grant?) but I'll confirm that next week.

Out of the darkness that is Scottish football the messiah returns...

noreply@blogger.com (Kyle) — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 08:41:34 PST

...so take a back seat Paul Scholes and Thierry Henry, The fox is back!

That's right, knowing that if things get worse for the Queen's 11 he maybe required to don the famous royal blue jersey to save his beloved Rangers, Foxy has come back to make up 10 tonight.

Grant and Robert are also playing in the absence of Jon, Stu, Alan, Neil and Si (is he sill alive?) but them playing is far less exciting...

As we speak foxy is doing shuttle runs up and down the office, and let me tell you...he's still pretty slow!

By the way Paul and I picked the teams.

For anyone who can't remember, this is how foxy left us last season!

Boaby the hero

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 01:40:35 PST

Family emergency last night so had to dive home last minute - thanks to much to Robert for filling in at very, very, short notice (I called him at 5:35pm!).

I'm delighted to think that Stuart and Jon see me as effective and skilful a player as Robert and decided not to change the teams :)

Anyone out next week, please let me know.

Treacher Testimonial

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 07:19:17 PST

This is Jon's last game for a while as he's got a new job that doesn't suck the very life from his soul. Unfortunately, it's in Inverness for six months so he'll taking a break from Fitbaw. He'll be back and so retains his Hardcore spot (sorry Robert - nice try).

Jon and Stu are the captains and the teams have been picked.

Cracking game

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 01:06:13 PST

Alan went to A&E last night but it's either soft tissue damage or a cracked rib and since there's nothing they can do for either, they didn't bother sending him for an x-ray. Let's just assume it's broken rib because that sounds a bit cooler. Unfortunately, that means that Alan's out for 2-6 weeks until it heals.

By the end of the match, a draw was probably a fair result but if Alan hadn't got injured then the Mince were probably on for a comfortable victory seeing as they were 5 up when the clash happened. Good game over all though.

Picked

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 04:39:01 PST

Alan and I were the captains this week and teams are up.

Si's long term injured and then has a course he's going on in the evenings so we may not see him until May! Paul is getting old and struggling with two games a week!

team picking failure.

noreply@blogger.com (Kyle) — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 02:38:52 PST

I think there have been cruise ships sail closer to the shores of Italian islands than that game last night, much like the Costa Concordia v the rock (as in the one at sea not the wrestler) there was only one winner and the Mince were left more embarrassed than a captain who 'slipped' into a life boat by accident.

Not the best way to celebrate Tommy Burns night but there's always next week.

Thanks to Michael, Grant and Robert for stepping in.

Ross and Michael paid a 10er so are owed £4, which is one way of guaranteeing you play again for Michael. Another option of almost certainly being ask back is to not pay at all. Grant took up this option. we also only paid £42 towards the pitch so owe £13 extra next week. £55 for the privilege of having holes in the net and fence, unlike captain schettino and the rock (as in the one at sea not the movie) they saw us coming.

when I figure out how the new man of the match poll work I get that up!

Murray Douglas Neil!

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 08:12:33 PST

I am delighted to report that Murray Douglas Neil was born on Thursday at 10:36pm weighing in a exactly 9lbs! Mother and baby doing very well but more importantly, it means Scott can come back and play fives!

Stu's in London this week, Si's hammy is still sore, Pual has a sore groin, Alan has the cold and I'm away for a few days to Elie. Robert and Grant are the ringers and Steve and Ross are the team captains.

I feel sick

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 13:36:13 PST

Still feeling pretty sick after the game - that felt like bloody hard work and I was genuinely surprised to sneak the win. Well played to Neil and Martie for choosing the teams and everyone else for another close and hard fought game. Next week Si thinks he'll still be out and I'm off to Elie for a couple of days. Not sure about Scott - depends on how the latest edition to the Neil family is (any hour now!).

Almost better than Alan in nets?

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Wed, 18 Jan 2012 03:21:06 PST

Game of the season!

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 01:18:15 PST

Well, so far, so good as far as the new team picking method is concerned - good job Jon and Paul! Let's hope it continues in the same form.

What a game last night, though! I really didn't think we could win but then some hard work to get some a couple of goals back plus few uncharacteristic mistakes in front of an open goal by the Tatties got us back into the game. Snatching the win at the end did feel a bit lucky though.

Remember, there is now some sort of fine for not voting in MOTM - you've been warned!

2012 team picking

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 01:03:59 PST

So with the delays and rush last week, there wasn't time to pick the teams the way it was decided at the Xmas night out. For those in need or a gentle reminder due to a Jägerbomb too many, the initial idea was to use the formula to pick the teams but it was decided that with ringers and change in poeple's form, that might not be as fair as we wanted. The plan was then to have the top two players pick the teams (based on the formula) so there was still a human element involved to take into account the concerns.

The old team formula was originally based on rank (see table below) and it meant that the #2 player had a slight rank advantage by 1 point.

Mince	Tatties
1	2
4	3
5	6
8	7
10	9
Total = 28	Total = 27

We can use this to pick the teams in the same way. Player 2 get the first pick, then player 1 gets two, then player 2 gets two, then it's one each until we have the teams:

Picking order = 2, 1, 1, 2, 2, 1, 2, 1

At the moment, we don't really have a clear picture of who the top players are so for the next few weeks, I'm going to pick two players of similar standard and style and designate them as the top two players. Seem fair enough? It's only until the table gets sorted out a bit.

This week's #1 and #2 are Jon and Paul. Both have different pros and cons but basically they're defensive players that offer a good range of passes with the occasional foray up front for a goal or two. Jon can't get email and stuff at his work so teams will have to be picked on the park so please bring both tops.

Finally, the cost of the pitches has been raised to £55 from £54 so that's one quid less each week for beer. However, Kyle has an idea on how to raise some more cash!

Hardcore players who don't vote in MOTM will be fined 50p which will be added onto their subs for the following week. So far Stuart, Martie and Paul owe 50p each - a massive total of £1.50. In 20 weeks that could significantly improve the kitty! You have been warned!

Options to increase payment to a full English pound will be considered for persistent none voters...You reading this Paul? -Kyle

Update - Neil has suggested docking points as a penalty rather than a monetary fine. Thoughts?

Date for the diary

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 06:49:25 PST

The Ian Younger Sixes is going to be on the 23rd June at Lesser Hampden so if you're interested then keep it free!

Happy New Year!

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 01:26:00 PST

What a shite way to start the season! I was horrifically late (really sorry about that), the weather was minging, it wasn't even a close game and, worse of all, Ross looked weird without a beard!

Welcome back everyone!

Rossco the POTY

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 02:00:56 PST

Commiserations to Neil - it was a brave run that saw him stay at or near the top the entire season which is something that's very hard to do. Ross, however, started slowly, caught up towards the middle then fell away in the latter half of the season but rallied well to clinch the title in the very last game of the season. He also won the MOTM award too so, I give you, King Ross! (Rossco - points will be docked from you next year if you're too smug about this!)

Neil's done some analysis of the season that tracks everyone's progress throughout the year and plots it on a graph - ooooh! Flat areas are weeks where you either weren't playing or were losing and upward ones are winnings streaks. Click to embiggen:

All in all, it's been a pretty good season:

We've only needed nine reserves the entire year which is the lowest we've ever had!
We've had a whopping 50 games which is the most ever in a season!
It finished at 23 games each to the Mince and Tatties with four draws - even stevens!
Jon racked up 45 games this year - the most anyone has ever played in a season!
Martie managed 27 (more than half) which is the most he's played in years!
No massive injuries (other than Steve but that's to be expected)!

However, it's not been without it's lows. There have been more handbags then usual, more goal line controversy (come on Sepp, get it sorted and get TV replays!) and not a small amount of bitching and whining about the team selections (but that's to be expected). The saddest thing about this season thought, is to lose Foxy to wife enforced retirement - hopefully we can see him back for the odd game if his old legs (and wife) will let him.

See you all Saturday from 3pm at The Admiral for beers, awards, 2 for 1 pizzas and an entire afternoon of Ross being totally unbearable :)

POTY Battle!

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 08:02:13 PST

Ross and Neil are debating the teams as we speak so as soon as they have agreed on them, I'll get them posted. Kyle's just moved house so it too busy and I'm going to watch my daughter give a commanding performance as "Sheep #1" in her nursery nativity play. Paul and Robert make up the ten men.

I'm gutted to be missing the big decider but best of luck to all tonight - may the best man win!

Commiserations Stuart

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 08 Dec 2011 01:24:21 PST

Congratulations Ross! A very tight game for the first half but then it all went the Tatties' way. A definite game of two halves.

So next week it'll be Neil vs Ross for the big POTY battle. Technically, Ross just needs a draw to claim the title. Scott and Kyle are back in but I'm missing out on the last game so I wish you all well.

Don't forget that we have the Fitbaw Xmas Extravaganza on the 17th at The Admiral from 3pm onwards. The awards will be hosted by Neil and Alan and Steve has got us 2 for 1 pizzas if we want them for later on.

Let battle commence

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 02:51:42 PST

Ross and Stuart have picked the teams. Stuart got first pick but, to protect the footballing challenged among us, I've randomised the order from how they were picked.

Just so you know how much this means to the boys, I'll relay a bit of the email thread below:

Ross: Hoho, and so the war of words begin! You realise you NEED to win tonight Stu? I've set up to play for the draw ;o)

Stuart: ha! i was born to win so there shouldn't be any trouble there. BRING THIS ON!!!!

Ross: I gave up my Monday game and took yesterday off work just to make sure I am in peak physical condition tonight!!!

Ross vs Stu

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 04:30:30 PST

So next week Steve and & Kyle should be back but Neil's got a gig so isn't playing. That means that Ross and Stuart have to battle it out to see who takes on Neil in the final game of the season for POTY. I think the best way would be for the two contenders to pick the teams themselves. Flip a coin for who gets first pick and the picks will go like this:

Contender A: 1, 4, 5, 8
Contender B: 2, 3, 6, 7

That gives both contenders a team ranking of 18 which seems fair all round.

The squad is likely to be:

Ross
Stuart
Steven
Jon
Iain
Si
Martie
Paul
Grant
Robert

Update - Scott can't actually play so I'll need to get another ringer in. Neither can Kyle. Grant and Robert are in.

Crunch time

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 08:45:24 PST

Steve's out with Man Flu this week, it's Kyle's birthday so he's out for dinner (Happy Birthday Kif!) and Alan & Foxy are injured.

So it's Ross vs Neil and Stuart. If Ross wins, him and Stuart go head to head next week in Neil's absence with the winner taking Neil on in the final game of the season. If Neil and Stuart win then next week, when Neil's away, won't matter and it's all down to Neil vs Stu on the final game of the season. So, either way, it's all coming down to the final game of the season and it's Neil's to lose!

Update - Jon's having to work late so may be 10 or 15 minutes late onto the pitch. As per official Fitbaw rules, any goals scored before Jon's arrived won't count and we go back to 0-0.

Handy Andy

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 24 Nov 2011 01:41:10 PST

That was a bit more like it. Everyone committed to winning but with no real niggle or arguing. Some great football played as well by both teams and, in my opinion, the best game we've had in ages. Well played to all.

Alan has pulled his calf in exactly the same way as Foxy so it looks like his season's over as well. Martie's going in to get his leg op that got re-scheduled from the other month so that's his season over too. Three Hardcore down for the rest of the season and it's Kyle's birthday so he's out for dinner. Scott's back in so that means we'll need two ringers again. It also means that Neil's going to dodge the Hat of Dooooom this season, much to the annoyance, I assume, of those chasing him.

Mathematically, it's still possible for Jon, Steve, Ross and Stuart to all catch up with Neil but that's not possible in theory as they can't all play against each other and Neil to make up the difference. Neil's missing one game out of the last three which will give Stuart and Ross the advantage in terms of games played if it all comes down to that.

So, next week, Stu and Neil can be in the same team against Ross which gives Ross the chance to catch them up and then the following week, if Ross wins, Ross can play against Stu (Neil's away) which gives either of them the chance to catch Neil. Then, it all comes down to the final game - either Ross or Stu vs Neil. Of course, if Neil and Stu win next week, then Ross would be out and then it's down to Stu to win the following week to take it to the final game of the season. I think! It could still be possible for Jon and Steve and I'll do what I can to give them the chance but it could lead to very imbalanced teams which wouldn't be fair on anyone. We'll see who's playing next week.

Oh, and last week's MOTM was a three way tie between Ross, Foxy and Stuart. Well done chaps. Biggest spread for MOTM I think we've ever had - seven different players!

Old Fox, new Andy

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 07:46:43 PST

Is with a saddened heart that I have to announce the retirement of the midfield general, the complete footballer, the Silver Fox, Mr Ian "Foxy" Fox. In his own words:

"As for next season, I've had a long hard think about this and I'm going to stand down and let someone get promoted to hardcore.

As much as I enjoy the football, I don’t seem to have the same verve that I’ve had in previous seasons and this is probably because I’m enjoying my golf more.

It’s not fair of me to keep my place from someone who is committed to playing on a more regular basis.

However, I don’t intend to totally disappear as I’m hoping that I would be considered for the odd game if you’re struggling with numbers and hopefully still get continued invites to any of the Fitbaw extravaganzas."

Foxy goes out after his injury guarantees him the Smelly Sannie award as the player to hold bottom position at the end of the season. That means he's won POTY, MOTM, MVP and the Smelly Sannie - all the major "awards" and the first person to do so. He also hold the dubious honour of one of only two people to walk off the park mid-game because of an argument - he really has it all!

Hopefully this won't be the last we see of him as he's still wanting to play the odd game but it does mean that there is a place for promotion come Xmas time!

Speaking of new blood, there's a new player tonight - a new Andy! This one, however, has played a bit. Andy, until recently, played amateur level football so can't be all that bad. He says he's OK which is a sure sign that he's pretty good. I'm sure we'll find out tonight.

George Pattullo

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 09:10:02 PST

I'm sure we've all wondered on many occasion just how Si has become the footballing inspiration that we now see gracing the park on Wednesday nights. Just where does that natural prowess and goal scoring instinct come from? Well, Si has finally come clean and revealed that he has always had footballing genius in his veins. Behold, Geroge Pattullo!

Foxy was holding the Mince back

noreply@blogger.com (cocovan) — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 02:05:28 PST

So the Mince were two down when Foxy collapsed, claiming he'd been shot, but they somehow managed to win by three? I can only assume Foxy was the week link outfield.

Everyone (bar Foxy, I'm assuming) seems to be available to a potential Hat of Doom which in reality means Neil's not going to get a game. Time for catch up!