tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-210112182011-12-30T13:15:47.378+13:00not a kid and not that friendlyStipey Sullivan's blogStipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.comBlogger135125friendlykidhttp://feedburner.google.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-50261609843439842762011-08-11T00:06:00.004+12:002011-08-11T11:30:59.566+12:002011-08-11T11:30:59.566+12:00Manchester August 9th 2011: Pure terror and havoc + cheap strawberriesManchester: 09/08/11 17.00 hrs (Market Street) "Pure terror and havoc + Free stuff....just smash shop windows and cart out da stuff u want!"
Manchester: 09/08/11 16.50 hrs (Market Street) I was there. Here is my shocking story....
I had just got the bus back from Bury (I'll just throw in some exciting minor details to add to the realism and make everything more exciting as we wait to get to theStipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-62455734488801889512011-08-09T16:07:00.000+12:002011-08-09T16:07:00.386+12:002011-08-09T16:07:00.386+12:00Spelling: Lactate. Agonising. Bungee. Munchkin. Ahhhh. Only Google understands me. Ahh.
I've been reading Caitlin Moran's new book 'How to be a woman' and I have to say, I've been reading it voraciously. And possibly empirically and anaerobically. I don't know what those words mean but I'm inspired to use them by Caitlin's big vocabularly. It's a bit like when you read a Will Self article - you pretty much need a dictionary nearby to help you out and you need to stop yourself Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-25038956725020255772011-08-08T11:06:00.000+12:002011-08-08T11:06:15.760+12:002011-08-08T11:06:15.760+12:00Gig 3; adhoc Gong Show hand up when the MC says, "Anyone else fancy a go..."
Yes, the Gong Show. What so-called comedians are supposed to fear. 3 people in the audience with red cards when all three hold em up - you get gonged off. A situation where slightly drunken idiots think - y'know what, I'll have a go......... And I couldn't resist.
Tonight I was that drunken idiot.
So it counts as Gig 3. Technically. Just biked it back home (oh my Hollywood life!). I wrote Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-48968619762551134592011-08-07T00:19:00.033+12:002011-08-07T00:19:01.178+12:002011-08-07T00:19:01.178+12:00Gig 2: Where 'that bigoted woman' came from. Marks out of ten? 4 for effort
My games teacher (hard to call him a teacher as all he ever did was sit in his little room and occasionally shout at us after football for not having a shower) used to give me a C+ for sport on my report.
'Good effort' he would write. He had no idea who I was. He had 3 different phrases he used in rotation and they were so dull I can't even remember them. But I'm expecting if he had Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com3Stretford, Manchester, Trafford M32, UK53.4493418 -2.312480499999992426.752051299999998 -62.07810549999999 80.1466323 57.45314450000001tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-59663535394510740312011-08-06T02:38:00.000+12:002011-08-06T02:38:34.362+12:002011-08-06T02:38:34.362+12:00Slow down we're gonna crash: economics and the power of R Kelly
Google Images for 'Plane Panic' you get this
Economics seems to be a bit like that that theory where if everyone in the plane doesn't believe that it can fly that it won't. It only takes one person to say, 'OH my gosh! Man wasn't made to fly! We're all doomed!' They stand up and go doo lally and everyone else panics, and the plane does as a result crash into a burning ball of ugly flames. IfStipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-51066890059809178912011-08-05T04:39:00.018+12:002011-08-05T04:39:00.440+12:002011-08-05T04:39:00.440+12:00My comedy ethos (whatever ethos means)Ethos is a Greek word meaning "character" that is used to describe the guiding beliefs or ideals that characterize a community, nation, or ideology. So, yeah, what I think is good. Or what I think is good for me.
What do I want from my comedy stand-up thing? What do I want from other people's?
From other people it's simple: surprise me. Take me in a new direction. Give me something that I'm Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-66705603433244969482011-08-04T04:40:00.017+12:002011-08-04T04:40:00.898+12:002011-08-04T04:40:00.898+12:00Comedy routine version 1.0 - a big listIn brief, here is what the massive audience at comedy gig number one got to listen to. In no particular order, and off the top of my head, there was stuff about the following:
Turbans
Breakfast cereals in my youth - their importance and relevance to religion
Drunks manufacturing cheap cereal
Russian wives dot com
How people in Thailand breed
The Edge from U2
The Buddhist theory of eternal Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-21923286990173079952011-08-03T02:43:00.007+12:002011-08-03T02:43:00.694+12:002011-08-03T02:43:00.694+12:00My comedy retirement, my comedy rebirth - pomposity is my rai·son d'ê·tre/rāˈzôN ˈdetr(ə)/Why did I give up stand-up comedy after 2 gigs almost 20 years ago?
I didn't like some of the people I dealt with. Particularly the 2nd promotor and I just thought, nah, I can't be bothered with this. I had already been writing for about 4 or 5 years and thought I was going to be recognised as a writing genius any day. I figured I could be a quite-good comedian, but never as good as I could be Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-72714745763122862362011-08-02T15:31:00.001+12:002011-08-02T15:31:00.364+12:002011-08-02T15:31:00.364+12:00In my absence, the continued existence of my blogWhat people have read and looked at while I've not been here:
Photos of Amy Winehouse looking tattooed and sad have proved 'popular'. Which is obvious enough. The point of that post was to point out that tattoos have become so mainstream and unremarkable. I wasn't having a go at tattooed people, just saying, wow, 10 or 15 years ago this person would look like a crazy biker/outcast with this Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-49791068752536070392011-08-01T04:25:00.002+12:002011-08-01T04:38:27.808+12:002011-08-01T04:38:27.808+12:00More or less a first gig. Maybe more less than more.Curiously, I'm reading Robbie Williams's authorised biography, 'Feel', at the moment. I don't know why I'm reading it but even more curiously I'm hooked. And it's not a biography it's more like a documentary, with the author following him around for a year. It's very well written and Mr Williams is an odd but engaging character with bon mots galore. I wasn't really expecting that when I picked itStipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-81168697855459234492011-08-01T02:24:00.003+12:002011-08-01T02:26:18.643+12:002011-08-01T02:26:18.643+12:00Doing a comedy course at The Comedy Store in Manchester with John Cooper Well, it's been something I've been thinking about for quite a while. If I had one of those bucket list things then the resurrection of my stand-up 'comedy career' would have been on it.
N.B. Before I go any further - why the constant need to use 'little speech marks', Mark? I think it must be to signal 'irony'. Chortle. Ho and ho.
So there's doing some stand-up. Running a marathon and errmmm.Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-75859077322432584442011-08-01T00:30:00.000+12:002011-08-01T00:30:19.373+12:002011-08-01T00:30:19.373+12:00Resurrection and comedy
Hullo. Hullo invisible people that probably don't exist. After a mammoth 19 month break I have decided to write a new message here. Many times over the previous months (years) I have thought what I assumed might be interesting thoughts but I've shelved them, sucked them down and drowned them in my own bitter tears. The meaning of everything is always confusing for me. The why and the need to do Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-78595585152347822152010-01-17T23:00:00.007+13:002010-01-18T11:20:58.764+13:002010-01-18T11:20:58.764+13:00Why human fat is the only fat it is perfectly safe to eatFat. Everyone loves a bit of fat. Whether it's in your 'healthy' half-fat milk or your indulgent bacon, sausage, fried bread and hash brown breakfast - you can't beat a nice bit of fat. Sadly, "the powers that be" have "decided" that fatty food is not good for us. Frankly it's "Political Correctness Gone Mad!!!". If I can't sit in my own home watching the Playland tv station whilst I mainline a Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-64080718539906372552010-01-17T07:02:00.004+13:002010-01-17T07:09:43.250+13:002010-01-17T07:09:43.250+13:00Earthquake + Haiti + 50,000 dead x Daily Mail = Asperger's Disease & Kate McCannFollowed up with a little bit of Beyonce in her knickers and some medical guff about eye tests. See here to read more here on Project76 blogStipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-79473044787299038902010-01-10T12:53:00.010+13:002010-01-11T00:13:32.025+13:002010-01-11T00:13:32.025+13:00Mad Dogs and Englishmen go out in the midday snowBritain + the weather. We love it. We love the fact that it's weather. It brings us together like the 'Spirit of the Blitz' (tm). Strangers talk in bus queues. Neighbours have baths and repeated multi-positional sexual intercourse with each other just to stay warm. It's a glorious thing.Here is a bit of the bbc website (quoted at length) to back up my tedious and predictable claim (note: I have 'Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-29430895458196819452010-01-02T09:15:00.007+13:002010-01-02T10:13:33.821+13:002010-01-02T10:13:33.821+13:00The invasion of the Singers: sewing machines from spaceSome points that I think I would like to have on record JUST IN CASE - just in case this time next year we are all slaves of weird and evil aliens from space. Don't say I didn't warn you, etc.Please note that frequently prophets are said to be mad and ignored in their own time. Perhaps this is one of those occasions; perhaps I am getting slightly over-excited by the weirdness of the contempory Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-56812826789951012732009-12-30T18:01:00.007+13:002009-12-30T18:01:00.396+13:002009-12-30T18:01:00.396+13:00Why the way people finger bread proves why the fight against global warming can never be won.Head in the sand, bread in the hand. That's what it's all about. People don't understand the knock on effect that their actions have. They've never seen one of those time-travel films where you stop Abraham Lincoln from being killed and end up 200 years later with Ron Jeremy as president. Still, worse things could happen - but that's not the point - people can't see the consequences of their Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-50214470994352366942009-12-28T17:26:00.001+13:002009-12-28T17:26:00.206+13:002009-12-28T17:26:00.206+13:00My teen fiction confession and my books of the yearI was talking about books the other day and I said, "I've been reading a lot of Young Adult fiction recently.""What?" she said, this person I was talking to, who had been telling me about a Nathaniel Hawthorne book she hadn't read. "What?""Teen fiction." I said, feeling slightly embarrassed."Teen? Is that some kind of porn?""What? Hey? No.""I thought you meant you meant fiction about... teens. Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-49533065214266107642009-12-27T07:53:00.006+13:002009-12-27T10:09:03.101+13:002009-12-27T10:09:03.101+13:00Why not just write any old rubbish?"Such a long time has passed since first I promised you the story of my adventures I am resolved to keep my word today, seeing we are happily met together to season those matters with lively conversation and tales of a merry and diverting sort."So begins this olde worlde 'novel', The Satyricon by some geezer called Petronius. A Roman fellow, long dead. And yeah, I been readin a bit of it, innit? Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-37174786459881630962009-08-28T22:33:00.003+12:002009-08-28T22:59:23.280+12:002009-08-28T22:59:23.280+12:00Why I am the web's leading expert on big ear holes and Madonna's eyebrowsI got a comment this week from a blog post I wrote almost a year ago, but it didn't surprise me because I am the web's leading expert on big ear holes and Madonna's eyebrows. It's official. I have Google Analytics statistics to back it up. Listen, it's not like I'm constantly checking to see if my imaginary readership has increased from 6 people spending 12 seconds deciding they're on the wrong Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-28127114923068797242009-08-26T23:43:00.009+12:002009-08-27T00:16:28.483+12:002009-08-27T00:16:28.483+12:00Why Roy Keane taught me everything I need to know about Englishness, but thanks for the email anywayOh, email forwards, aren't they great? They're usually jokes and pictures of horrible things for you to laugh at. I remember at work some hilarious person was sending round about twenty photos of 'unattractive' naked ladies. And it was Friday afternoon and one chap found it so funny that he immediately had to forward it on to all his mates in the company.Unfortunately when he went into the 'Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-46529312784445662512009-08-24T00:12:00.011+12:002009-08-24T01:41:21.465+12:002009-08-24T01:41:21.465+12:00Why someone needs to do the young Miss MarpleIt's the in thing these days in the film & tv world - origins stories. So we've had Batman Begining, Superman when he lived in a Smallville and now Alien Origins - Ridley Scott has signed up to make a film about how that alien ended up on a space ship in the first place. Smashing. Well he's a good director and it's a decent plot so why not. The 'industry' loves nothing better than using a Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-81862828857308338262009-08-16T02:31:00.015+12:002009-08-16T11:13:15.026+12:002009-08-16T11:13:15.026+12:00Why Primark and poshness have ruined charity shopsI was in a charity shop in glorious Levenshulme last week dropping off a bag of 40 books. I walked in the door and waited for the lady in charge to poke her head out of the back room and look at me. The conversation went something like this:Me: "Is it okay if I drop off some books?"Lady: "There's nothin electrical in there is there?"Me: "Just books. Lots of books."Lady: "We can't take electrical.Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-82808199408990631342009-08-12T00:33:00.020+12:002009-08-13T07:55:17.011+12:002009-08-13T07:55:17.011+12:00Why can't these women just leave the dolphins alone!My life style guru said no. She said it was a bad idea. I forget her exact words but it was something like - nooooooooooooooooooo, noooooo, nooooo, no - don't do it - no. So of course I did. It was a few months back and I've recovered now. I've stopped. But for a while, I admit, I did indulge in some internet dating...Now I'm not a misanthropist - some of my best friends are people. And I can't Stipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21011218.post-77032344100720741712009-08-10T11:43:00.008+12:002009-08-10T12:33:55.089+12:002009-08-10T12:33:55.089+12:00Why PIE - a month by month guide to the art of pie-making - a story of partial failureIt was January - there was optimism and probably a very cold wind in the air - my culinary and lifestyle guru challenged me to make a pie EVERY month throughout 2009. 'Hurrah!' I said. 'W00t!!! Yes! I'll do it!!!' I loved those excalamation marks back in January 2009. It was such an optimistic month! Here's what I did wrote: "Indeed, why pie? Well why not pie. Given all the New Year's resolutionsStipey Sullivanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12286651621856169706noreply@blogger.com2