Gardening

Nothing in Particular

2005-02-27T17:57:00.000-08:00

Hi, People. It's been a while. The Incredibles just won for best animated feature film! I'm so excited! Loved that movie. So simple, clever, and funny.

Anyway, too many things going on right now. Where to start? Hm. Mindless rambling will begin with the here and now and then digress into other time periods.

Am currently getting over the cold/SARS/bronchitis/flu/whatever. I hate being sick. I missed work on Thursday because I wanted to take a break from talking and try and stop the coughing. I tried to "teach" with as little talking as possible on Tuesday and Wednesday. Some of you might think, "Oh, that's SO easy." Hm. Well, let me tell you it was incredibly difficult and extremely frustrating. I don't do "hand out worksheets and let them do their assignment." It sucks. And it's bad teaching. Whoever said that you can just hand things out to students and they'll learn is an idiot and should learn from someone who's a little more knowledgeable about educating people in the most effective way.

So to save my sanity, I stayed home Thursday. Was also trying to wean myself off of Dayquil--shit you should not take lest you are desperate to depart the conscious world for a few hours and return feeling like you are on B-list hallucinogens. Yes I was that desperate.

Friday wasn't much better. Reported to work to find out that they had a sub ready to call just in case (in point, should have just stayed home). Sigh.

Had a sort of anger-meltdown Friday night while still nursing my cold. Of course, this happens because I bottle up little things that I notice or bother me over a course of a few weeks. And I can never find a good time to talk about them. Manage to straighten it all out at 2 AM Saturday when one of the most understanding people in the whole world decided to come over and see how I was doing. Sometimes I wonder how he puts up with me.

It's funny how women work. We need to be told that we are loved, that people care about us. No, not just people, men. Why is that? I wonder if it's years of self-doubt or some sort of nurtured dependency on being a couple with someone that makes you think you aren't loved just because the words aren't used. I suppose it might mean I'm a little self-absorbed because I was too mad to step outside of my anger and look at what was going on. Hm.

Not sure if that paragraph made sense. Anyway, I am extremely grateful to have said person in my life.

Am watching the Oscars. Damn, Chris Rock is funny.

And WHAT happened to Scarlett Johanssen's hair? It looks like a fried bird nest. You know, the fried noodle thingy that has seafood in it. Chinese food. Served at my sister's wedding reception.

I'm going to NYC in a couple of weeks. I'm so excited! I get to see my NY people and all my old students. Am looking forward to visiting all of my old haunts. It's funny how I was so set on booking it from NY and yet, I miss parts of it so much. As I've always said, I would always miss the people.

Am going back to watch the Oscars. For real, this time. More rambling later...

Christmas Eve

2004-12-24T19:20:00.000-08:00

It has been nice relaxing at home in suburban Houston (is there any other kind of Houston)? I've been making my rounds, doing the usual thing I do when I'm home--eating, shopping, talking on the phone. It's like I regress to when I was in high school...minus the shopping.

Decided, for some reason, to go shopping today. The day before Christmas Eve. I didn't really consider what that would mean for me, but figured that the rest of the shopping world would have to somehow adjust.

Of course, this meant that my new focus--shearling lined boots--were nowhere to be found. Except of course, you wear a size 10. As I've always said--you've got big hips and big feet, you're set for fashion. I did, however, find a pair of Born shearling boots (that look pretty ridiculous...so silly that they're cool), that were amazingly comfortable (far more comfortable and sleeker...at least on the bottoms...than Uggs). Had a nice short conversation with the sales person who hails from the South Side of Chicago.

And I went on my mission to find as much of my signature scent as I could handle before a) the scent goes bad and b) I break the bank. Much to my dismay, Ralph Lauren is phasing out the perfume that I've consistently worn for the longest period of time. It is the one scent that I do not associate with any past boyfriend or lover (I guess if you want to call some of them that...I prefer not to, but the word sounds funny). I just associate it with me. I've abandoned countless scents because they are associated with a crappy, unfit, or just awful ex. And now Ralph Lauren is going to get rid of it.

I guess I could buy gallons of it. But I know perfume wears out after about a year. So I bought about a year's worth. I guess that's enough time for me to get used to the fact that I can no longer wear this scent. Maybe I could find it at a discounted place. Sigh.

Forgive me if I seem a little superficial with the whole fragrance thing. I'm not sure why I'm so hung up on it.

But, at least I got really warm boots. And a small pink purse made out of seatbelts (it's the mini pink me to my green seatbelt bag...If you'd like one, there at www.seatbeltbags.com).

Of course, when I got home from the mall, I got to help wrap presents for everyone. It just seems like every year we get more and more into buying gifts for the kids. I think over 70 percent of the gifts were for Evan and Matthew. Mostly for Evan. It's hard being a kid when you can't appreciate your gifts.

And of course, onward with the holiday baking. This year, I've decided to experiment with Splenda. My brother and his girlfriend have had bad experiences with it (they tried it with cakes), but everything turned out peachy with the cookies. I made monstrously big cookies because I'm too lazy to dish out the small ones. The only other time I made cookies this big (or bigger) was with Jess, and that was when we added double the amount of shortening. I have to say those were the BEST tasting cookies ever. But these Splenda cookies would make Jess proud, too.

And now, after a convenient dinner of frozen pizza with dad and Aaron, I settle in. My family doesn't really do a big hoo-ha for Christmas Eve. Not sure why. The big deal is on the holiday, and that's with the kids. Jon found it kind of weird that we don't really do anything big, but that's kind of the way we are. I guess it explains why I resist going out all the time. I'm used to staying at home. I guess this also explains my high intrapersonal intelligence.

In the meantime, Jon and his parents are going to mass. I'm a little envious. Christmas mass is always good.

And it's SNOWING in HOUSTON. Can you believe it? The neighbors across the street were having the world's shortest snow ball fight with the world's smallest snow balls. Kind of funny. Kind of sad. All of Houston is freaking out. Snow! Snow! Snow!

The last time it snowed, it was 1991. I know this because we have it on videotape. This will be Matthew's first snow. I'm sure Evan doesn't care because he's been out to Utah. This is snow to the negative 100th degree. Fractional.

Ah, just five more hours till Christmas. Yes, it's Christmas. Not the holidays. As my friend Zataya says, "It's creepy when people do Christmas without Christ." I agree.

Merry Christmas to all!

Basketball

2004-12-20T08:40:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I went to go see my boys play basketball at Von Steuben--a high school that was once known for its academic excellence and know is known as a basketball powerhouse.

The freshmen did not look like freshmen. I guess that's what happens when you recruit actively for bball players instead of students.

I wonder what's next for these kids. Endorsement deals from the bodega around the corner?

I came to the game with a big sign to wave. People were impressed. I'm not sure why. I guess supporting your students off the clock is surprising in general.

I got to see my students, most of whom struggle in reading and writing, shine on the court. They were excited and working hard. So how does that get lost in class?

If I could, I'd invent a magic machine to transfer the excitement and importance placed on sports into the classroom. Imagine parents gathering outside of your room cheering on their students to write better! Imagine cheerleaders holding signs that say, "You can do it!" when the students struggle with complex sentences. Imagine an enormous amount of attention put on you, the student, because your fans out there believe in you even if you make a mistake.

So why doesn't it happen? A teacher can only do so much. What happened to the rest of the crowd? And I'm not talking about just parents, but family members, siblings. Where are they?

No bball player likes to play in an empty court. With total silence. So why does it happen in the one place that can make or break them in life?

2004-12-13T19:22:00.000-08:00

Puffer vests and layered tees.

Have a Merry Holiday!

2004-12-13T18:54:00.000-08:00

Winter break is in four days, and I'm so excited.

Those of you who read my last blog might get the idea that I dislike teaching. In fact, it's quite the opposite.

My boyfriend listens to me stress about work and asks, "Are you really happy?" And I say, "There's nothing I'd rather do."

Things I Love About My Job

1) I get to say good morning to 142 teenagers, and they say good morning back to me!

2) I can walk down the hallway afterschool, wish students a good weekend, and they will politely respond and wish me the same.

3) I am constantly being challenged.

4) I get to learn something new (well, often many things new) every day.

5) It is never boring. Ever.

6) It's great practice in human relations.

7) It's great practice in advertising.

8) It's great practice in being patient.

9) And if you are patient enough, you can see young boys and girls grow up to be young men and women.

10) It's okay to hug your clients at work.

But it's definitely not for everyone...

Happy Holidays!

December 9, 2004

2004-12-09T11:08:00.000-08:00

Along with this being payday (hooray!), it's also the first day of my "blogging." The word sounds a lot like "clogging" which brings to mind lots of unpleasant, toilet-related images. Ew.

I like to garden, and if I had a literal garden, I would. For now, I have to settle with gardening in the jungle one would call "urban education."

Today was day 2 of instituting the "If you don't have your book today, you can't come to class" rule. A more quiet riot erupted than the one yesterday. Apparently, the days when students would come to class with THEIR OWN book and prepared are gone. I guess it's too much to ask students to keep track of their schoolwork. What were we thinking?

I'm thinking of posting a Christmas wishlist in my room. Something to the effect of:

What Ms. Chang Wants for Christmas:
1) All of her students to do their homework.
2) All of her students to do their homework correctly.
3) All of her students to follow directions.
4) All of her students to stop whining.

I guess there would be more, but I'm not one to be greedy.

And I suppose now would be the time to start the countdown till Christmas break...only 6 school days left.

For those of you who think it would be great to be a teacher because "you get all those holidays," consider this:
1) You see 80 kids a day.
2) You grade papers for at least 2 hours a night.
3) Your students do not follow directions even after repeating them in multiple forms (written, verbal, interpretive dance, etc.).
4) Your students then whine and complain when they do not get credit for work that did not follow the directions.
5) Your students expect to great grades because they want great grades.
6) Your students hate it when teachers play favorites, but then want you to give them a break "just this one time."
7) Your students forget what you've taught them a day later (if you're lucky).
8) You have to supply your own classroom materials.
9) The culmination of bad schooling/bad teaching/bad family/bad neighborhood results in the solution that you must correct all of it (this really applies to only high school teachers).
10) Parents are either non-existent or have no control over their children.
11) You hear the words, "I don't care" when they really do, "I hate you" when they really don't, and "I'm not going to detention" when they really are. Multiply this by a hundred.
12) Picture 25 kids running at you with questions. Add on ten extra kids if you are in an overcrowded school.
13) Other professionals think your job is cake.
14) If you are a reflective, diligent teacher, your pay ends up being less than 8 dollars an hour.
15) You have 80 hour work weeks regardless of your location.

Need I say more? If I do, then the problem lies somewhere else...