Ashley here,

I recently got this question on my Facebook wall:

Pi Thar asks:
“How can I make my ex girlfriend want to return to me after she has moved on with another guy??????”

Great question Pi!

And sadly, it’s much TOO common nowadays.

Look, the truth is most women will ONLY comfortably leave a man when she has another guy “waiting” on the sidelines.

Unless your woman is super independent and confident, the truth is most women just don’t like to be alone.

Now, that may sound like bad news for you, but let’s look at things from HER point of view…

1. If she left you, then that tells me that she wasn’t getting her most important needs met.

2. Most women have orbiters (male friends who hang around them) who will happily take over the role of comforting her and giving her what she wants.

If she has jumped ship – from you to new guy rather quickly – then often it’s because this new guy simply came along at the right time…

It doesn’t mean her feelings for him will LAST.

Actually, most rebounds are short-lived for a reason. The main purpose of a rebound boyfriend is often to comfort a woman while she goes through a very difficult transition in her life.

While you are someone who constantly argues with her or makes her unhappy, this new guy is the exact opposite of that.

HE understands her…
HE listens to her…
HE gives her the attention and affection she needs…

It’s like she got herself a new blanket to comfort herself with at night because the old one were full of holes, had a funky smell and resembled a dead animal on the side of the road…

Ok that may be a tad exaggerated…

Anyway, my point is, this new guy is her way of COPING with her emotional needs and unhappiness.

Now, the GOOD news…

You had her heart once,
She loved YOU and YOU only,
She was loyal to only YOU at one point in her life.

And women’s emotional memories are SHARP as a whistle.

We remember EVERYTHING.. especially when there are emotions attached to the memory.

The good news is, you don’t need to RECREATE completely new emotions and new connections between you and her.

It is ALREADY there in her memory.

Your job is simply to TAP into it and UNLEASH it back to the present…

You know how women get teary eyed and all emotional after watching romantic movies, and guys are often dragged to see these movies and end up sitting there bored?

It’s because women put THEMSELVES into the characters of the movie.

We imagine what it would feel like to BE the girl who gets the guy, or to BE the girl who gets her heart broken, or BE the girl who gets romanced and swept away by that charming guy on the screen.

We see these images and we really feel it in our hearts, it could be us.

Guys often complain that women SAY this is what we want, but when it is actually presented to us by a real guy, we aren’t exactly falling all over him.

Welllll….

Remember, CONTEXT and the LEAD UP to a great romantic gesture is just as important as the romantic gesture itself.

For women, it’s all about playing a part in a story and going on an adventure.

Trust me, these are the things that TURN US ON.

Okay, so how can you use this to STEAL her back from this new “rebound” guy who has temporarily stolen her attention away from you?

Do you REALLY want to know…

Are you sure?

…

Okay I’ll stop teasing..

**********************************
… You Tell Her a New Story About You
**********************************

Did I mention that women love story, drama and adventure? Well there, I’ve said it again. We LOVE that stuff.

So, imagine you’re playing part in a movie. Looking at your life now… are you the lead character or are you a secondary character?

In other words, do you feel like you’re in charge or that someone or something else is in charge of you?

And is this life looking exciting? .. Or a bit dull?

Get clear on what you’re striving towards and what your greater goals are.

Women want to see a man with ambitions and a vision for the future. They want to know that if they choose this man, this man is capable of figuring out problems and also can look after her.

The first thing you do is:

* Be cool and confident around her
* Be completely okay that she is seeing someone else
* Show off your achievements/your vision
* Direct her instead of allow her to direct you

You get her to seek YOU for attention, approval, ideas, support etc

…by demonstrating that you are someone who is outside the “problem”.

You’re the guy who makes her laugh, who is passionate and excited about the future, who cares about the people around him, who knows what he wants and what his boundaries are, the guy other women want to date and be with… you’re a “catch”.

You’re not going to act like a supportive boyfriend who listens to all her problems… especially when she has the rebound guy for that (good for him?)

No, you’re the guy who offers something exciting, fun and SEXY in her mundane, dull and problem-ridden life!

And who knows her better than you?!

So, these are FORBIDDEN:
* Begging
* Crying
* Getting emotional
* Losing your temper

(If you do these now, start and STAY in No Contact until you ARE the person I mentioned above)

And these are also forbidden:

* Doing everything she asks you to do like a love sick puppy dog
* Answering her calls at all hours of the day and night
* Sending her love letters or love texts
* Supporting her when she has a guy who is ALSO supporting her … Come on, why are you doing this to yourself?!

And please, don’t wait for her to make up her mind about who she wants to be with, make it FOR her!

You might want to read that last point again…

Do NOT act like her emotionally supportive boyfriend when she is with ANOTHER GUY!

And if she can’t decide who to be with, don’t even WAIT for her to make up her mind, MAKE IT FOR HER!

Remember, direct her don’t allow her to direct you.

Okay, so what are you waiting for?

Start doing something RIGHT NOW.

Whether it’s writing down your goals…
Hitting the gym…
Deleting that love letter you’ve been wanting to send…
Whatever it is, start doing it!

Okay, I’ll be back with more…

Best wishes!
Ashley

P.S.

Want to ask a question like Pi?
Just “LIKE” my Facebook page and post your question on here : http://www.facebook.com/ashleyk.advice

You asked, I answered. Here’s the hot questions I cover in this awesome video:

• How to get your ex to initiate contact when in No Contact
• The biggest MYTH about your ex and why it could be KILLING your progress
• Why it is a GOOD thing if your ex have blocked you from social media sites (Facebook)
• Why your ex still CARES about you!
• How to decide if it’s worth going back with your ex or moving on?
• If no contact doesn’t work, should you try to be friends?
• Why you could be using No Contact the wrong way without even knowing!
• Why being “just friends” doesn’t work and what to do instead

If you want a step by step system that will take you from A-Z to reunite with your ex.. you can download my program here.

These are just some of the things you’ll discover in this video! It’s a bit longer than my usual ones (30+ minutes) so get a cup of coffee and get comfortable

Oh, and there’s a bit of a surprise at the end too! I couldn’t resist…

Let me know what you think,

Ashley

P.S.

Oh, and if you’d like to know what website I’m talking about in the video, Click Here.

I’m intrigued by very few programs in the “attraction” market mainly because I’ve read a fair few of them and it’s rare to find one that is truly unique and revolutionary.

Lately it’s come to my attention a product that seems to stand out from the rest. I’ve been curious about this program for a while, so I thought I’d finally take the time to have an intimate look and see what it really offers men about women and dating.

If you’re curious what a woman thinks of a system for men, this is my brutally honest review of Vin DiCarlo’s Pandora’s Box.

Pandora’s Box is a system created by Vin DiCarlo, one of the leading coaches for men today on attracting women, getting more dates with women and gaining self-confidence for men.

I’m aware a lot of products online fail to live up to the hype it promises initially, leaving a lot of customers feeling dissatisfied and cheated, so I was careful to pay attention to what the system promised from the outset compared to what the product actually delivered.

What You Get With Pandora’s Box:

• Pandora’s Box Core System (10 videos and 10 pdfs)
• Profiler Quiz (find out her type with 95.6% accuracy)
• The Pandora’s Box Ultimate Strategy Guide (how to get her once you know her type)

What I Loved:

Okay, let’s first talk about what I really loved about this program. It IS rather different to the other ones I’ve looked at and the concept within are rather revolutionary.

Why is it revolutionary?

What they have essentially worked out is that women are ALL different and receptive to different types of approaches and different types of men (ie. Not ALL women are attracted to alpha males) and you can’t use one-size-fits-all strategies on women as a group together. Their idea is that women can be categorized into 8 types and by knowing which “type” a woman is, you can make subtle changes to your approach that will give you the best success with that one particular woman.

They have a mathematical formula for determining the 8 types and I guess, men being men, have a need to develop scientific theories, especially theories about women that actually WORK so they can teach other men and demonstrate how smart they are at the same time.

If you’re a man who enjoys learning theories and having a “formula” for attracting and understanding women, this is right up your ally.

I’m not big on formulas as they are usually confusing and I can’t remember them for the life of me. With that being said, the formula laid out in Pandora’s Box is really dead simple and as basic as it can get. You shouldn’t have trouble learning it but you may need to spend a bit of time fully understanding it and memorizing it so you can comfortably use it in the “real world”. (This shouldn’t take you more than 10-15 minutes if you really concentrate)

I liked the way they lead into explaining the concept they have developed, which is that women ultimately have 3 conflicts within them at all times. Depending on how a woman deals with each of the 3 conflicts will determine which of the 8 types she is.

I can’t reveal all the secrets, so I won’t say anymore than that.

What I will say is that as a woman reading this, it WAS rather eye-opening for me, because of how accurate and true it all was. (Men ARE clever!)

It’s very clever that men are able to understand all the issues women need to deal with on a consistent basis and simplify it down to very basic but important elements that explain a bunch of reasons why women may have rejected you in the past.

For example, this will explain:

• Why you’ve been turned down for a date
• Why you can’t get out of the “friendzone” with a girl
• Why women pick other men over you
• Why you can’t get a woman’s phone number
• Why that woman you’re dating just never seems as into you as you’re into her
• Why you keep getting heart-broken by women
• Why she may be into you one minute and then completely disinterested the next

These are things women intuitively understand amongst women but which men, those getting rejected, just don’t understand at all.

Pandora’s Box reveals all of these things and that’s why the name is so fitting. It will literally open up the doorways to another world, the world of women speak and get you to understand exactly what she is thinking and what she is looking for.

Pandora’s Box system will help you pinpoint the type of any woman in your life, sometimes even within minutes of meeting them. Once the type is known, there is the included Ultimate Strategy Guide which shows you what to do depending on which type she is.

The strategy guide is a guideline of what to do. It doesn’t go into specific details but gives enough. So as long as you’re not completely 100% clueless with women, you should be able to follow it and incorporate your own personality with no problems.

After putting myself under the test and getting my own “type”, I found their analysis to be 75% accurate. Most of it will work just fine, and in most cases, you’ll only need to do 1 or 2 things brilliantly for the girl to have no problems going out with you. (Women aren’t THAT evil so don’t sweat it if you screw up a little bit!)

Judging from the accuracy of my own “type”, I would say the others are about the same, probably 75%-90% accurate depending on the woman.

There’s still the typical fundamental stuff which you will need to use in your approach (confidence, being genuine, having a sense of humour etc), those things will work on most type of women!

The things that are more specific to your type of woman are mentioned within the Ultimate Guide included in Pandora’s Box.

What I Didn’t Like:

Within this system, the goal is not to get laid by women, get a woman on a date or even to get a woman to be your girlfriend (which also sets the system apart from others I’ve seen). The goal for this system is to achieve “Total Devotion” from a woman.

As a woman, I can’t say I agree with this and I think it’s partly why Vin DiCarlo added a lot of disclaimer about how to use this system ethnically. Basically, if your intention IS to manipulate women and brainwash them into devoting their whole life to you, then please do us both a favour, and DON’T buy this program.

With that said though, I disagree that you’ll ever get “Total Devotion” from any quality woman that is confident and knows her own worth. The reason being, confident and quality women are seeking a partner who knows how to treat them right and understands a relationship is a JOINT partnership. Basically, the same rules for having a long lasting and blissful relationship applies, you’ll STILL need to put in the hard work once you have her. Don’t expect her to do all your cooking, cleaning, ironing and be massaging your feet every night, while you play video games, drink beer and get fat on the couch.

Actually, don’t expect her to stick around if you’re the type to get complacent and “quit” putting effort into a relationship once you’ve got her.

The ones who will probably be MOST susceptible are those who have low self-esteem to begin with and will eat up any attention a guy throws her way. That’s why you need to be careful when using these tactics on more “vulnerable” women – sure it may work better and they may be the ones chasing you, but they won’t be the quality ones you actually want to settle down with.

The Ultimate Guide could also be “better” than what it was. The guide is more just a set of guidelines to follow for each type of women, and won’t be that helpful if you’re completely new at attraction and getting women in the first place.

For example, if you don’t have ANY female friends and can’t even look at a woman without being embarrassed, this system isn’t going to do much for you.

From what I gather, this system assumes you’re already pretty good with women, can attract and pick up random women but just want to “up” your success rates or want a better success rate with one particular woman or friend you’ve got your eyes on.

Special Mentions:

I really enjoyed Video #3, which explains the difference between men and women. I like learning new things about human psychology and this section taught me new things that I didn’t expect to find. I especially liked the part about the comedian’s analogy of men and women’s brains.

This section is great for gaining a deeper appreciation of the female brain and how it differs from males. Basically, as much as you may complain that women are “pains in the ass” half of the time, you wouldn’t want it any other way, trust me!

Basically, men and women are meant to be different to compliment one another so they can experience the full spectrum of life together.

Where They Over-Hyped:

Video #2 talks about redefining your goal, and it’s the section I didn’t like about “taming” women. What I will say is that, if you’re a man who has been bossed around by women all your life, then wanting to tame women will be very appealing in deed.

What I feel is probably more rewarding is the idea of elevating your OWN worth and value, so of course women will be chasing after you. It’s about gaining confidence, elevating your social value and being comfortable happy and content with who you are.

Women will absolutely go all gooey and be falling all over you if you have this character “strength” within you, and that comes from within. Doing things that may help you externally are mostly temporary and won’t give you long-term satisfaction.

Does it Work?

If you pick her type accurately (there is a Profiler Quiz that you can use to get a 95% accurate reading of her type), and do what is recommended within the Ultimate Guide, there is very very good chance of you having success with the girl you have your eyes on.

MOSTLY because you will not be bumbling around in the dark about whether you’re coming on too strong, or not coming on strong enough or being too “friendly” etc. You’ll have more confidence that what you’re doing WILL work on her because you’ve done your homework and know what things she’ll be receptive to and respond positive to ahead of time.

That being said, you will still need to be yourself, be relaxed, confident and be able to take the lead.

Okay, so as mentioned before, when I was accessing myself and what “type” I was, I took their Profiler Quiz included in the Pandora’s Box System.

Prior to taking the quiz, I already thought I knew what type I’d be, but I was in for a bit of a surprise!

The quiz was 95% right to what I initially thought, so at this point, I figured it was only a bit off. However, when reading their analysis of my type, they actually got me pretty accurately.

When I told my boyfriend about this, he completely agreed with the quiz result! Then I thought about it, and I realized that although I had thought myself to believe one way was right, the quiz wasn’t wrong either!

For quizzes like this, never expect a 100% accuracy rating (in fact it’s advertised to be at 95.6% accurate), it’s just not going to happen. But it’s going to be accurate enough (about 80-95%) to do what it’s meant to do – give you a HUGE insight into your woman’s mind. After all, getting 80% insight into a woman’s mind is still 100x better than having zero insight at all.

The other thing I want to stress about using this system is that, although I rate it highly and think it’s absolutely brilliant, it’s still no magic bullet! You may STILL experience “some” rejection. And frankly, you shouldn’t be upset if you are still being rejected because at least you’re putting yourself out there! Some rejection is a GOOD thing, it means you’re trying things and doing stuff.

A guy doesn’t get women by simply sitting at home all the time playing video games. He goes out and puts himself out there in front of women! He says stuff to them, he makes them laugh, he may unknowingly insult them every now and then and come off as a creep, but the point is, he IS doing it and learning as he goes!

The guy sitting at home will NEVER improve and NEVER have the success he wants with women.

When you get a rejection, be PROUD that you actually did something to get that rejection in the first place. A woman who rejects you is really doing you a favour, it means she is either not right for you at all OR she is just too stupid and dumb to realize how right you ARE for her. Either way, you deserve someone who recognizes and appreciates you as much as you appreciate her.

Price? Is it Worth it?

It IS a bit expensive at $69.95, which is more expensive than the other products on the market.

It is also NOT a beginner’s guide to attracting and getting women. If you are completely clueless with women, this system probably won’t help you much as the techniques are more advanced and more in terms of “guidelines” to be followed for each type than anything specific to do.

You would need to study up on other basic programs like Double Your Dating to get the whole idea of what to do.

Although it’s pricy, this program is still very good and worth having a look at if you specifically have a woman in mind you want.

This is for you if:

• You want to get your ex girlfriend back
• You have a friend who you want to date
• There’s a girl you’re interested in getting to know but you’re not sure how to advance on her so you won’t get rejected
• The girl you’re after is seeing someone else and you’re not sure how to attract her without pushing her further into the other guy
• You want to be able to build even FASTER rapport with women you have just met
• You want to get women to commit to you “faster”

This is NOT for you if:

• You are still afraid to talk to girls
• You’re looking to learn how to meet, pick up and approach women
• You’re looking to be a chick magnet and have women chasing after you when you don’t meet any woman at all.
• You just want to manipulate and break woman’s heart because you’ve been heart-broken in the past and now want “revenge”.

Check Out This Free Video About How to Trick Her Into Chasing You & Read Her Mind

Final Verdict

Effectiveness: 9/10

Ease of Use: 4/10

Value: 7/10

Customer Support: N/A

Overall Satisfaction: 8.5/10

Check out The Pandora’s Box System Here

In this video, I break down what to do if you’re currently friends with your ex but would like more then that.

This video will help you learn the proper things/topic to tell your ex during your first initial contact after going on NC (no contact)

In this video I reveal 3 things that most people are NOT doing when they want their ex back.. the steps to winning your ex back is actually fairly basic (revealed in this video and part 2 of this video). These are things most people don’t know about OR don’t know how to do correctly! It’s all here so pay attention!

To Watch Part 2 of This Video Click Here

(Take Quiz First To Get a Personal Evaluation Of Your Situation)

1st Thing You Need to Know to Get Your Ex Back

Going through any break up will be difficult so I want to make it as easy for you as possible.

First of all, you need to know that what you may have done so far to get your ex back is simply NOT effective.

This is because you’re likely to be driven by EMOTIONAL wants and desires.

When you’re emotional, you tend to exhibit a weakness that is simply not attractive to an ex partner.

Therefore if you’re a man and you’ve reverted to beta-like characteristic, this may be keeping your woman away from you.

And if you’re a woman, begging and pleading your man to come back will not be exactly attractive and appealing either.

2nd Thing You Need to Know to Get Your Ex Back

Remove your ex partner’s resistance from you and the break up first, before attempting to try any sneaky attraction tactics to get him or her back.

Removing their resistance is about using No Contact or Limited Contact CORRECTLY! A lot of people struggle with this because they don’t understand how to do it effectively!

The question I get asked the most are:

“If I don’t contact my ex, how will they know I still care?”
“I feel No Contact would be hopeless as it seems they don’t care about me anymore. What if it doesn’t work?”
“How do I contact my ex after a break up? How can I get my ex to talk to me again?”
“I feel I’ve made too many mistakes already. Is it too late?”
“How do I know I still have a chance with my ex?”
“What if my ex is seeing someone else?”

I want to help you with all of these questions, through my blog (please have a look around and learn all you can) and through my free newsletter here. I also highly recommend you check out my complete guide to winning your ex back, The Ex Recovery System.

3rd Thing You Need to Know to Get Your Ex Back

Re-attracting your ex partner is not exactly the same as attracting someone new. If you want to get your ex’s interest, you need to show him or her that you have being making some progress and have CHANGED since the break up.

This can be ANY change, as long as it’s not something you usually do. This will get an ex’s interest. Eg. if you’re usually a stay-at-home person, now is the time to go out and get active and social. And if you’re usually a social person, who parties a lot, instead of going out every weekend, why not take up a new hobby and devote some energy into that for a change.

Re-attraction is a huge topic on its own, here’s some places for you to get started!

• Women – Click Here on How To Get Your Ex Boyfriend Back.
• Men – Click Here on How to Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back

Once again, if you haven’t taken a look yet, please check out my video and part 2 of my video here:

To Watch Part 2 of This Video Click Here

(Take Quiz First To Get a Personal Evaluation Of Your Situation)

The Facebook report I sent you the other day was a hit and a lot of you are using it and seeing results!

Now, if you’ve started following the steps, and found your ex to have “blocked you”, “unfriended you” or started posting up pics of themselves with their new love interest, then instead of being sad and thinking it’s all doomed…

BE HAPPY about it.

Yep.

This is a CLEAR sign that they are BOTHERED by seeing you doing so well… and if they are bothered.. then they must CARE.

After all, if it was any other friend who was posting good things about themselves on Facebook, would they act hostile like this? Why would you act negative if it didn’t bother you?

If you tough it out through this “test” of theirs, you’ll see that they will contact you and things will turn around.

But you need to recognize when your ex is reaching out to you, and give them the benefit of the doubt.

It’s not easy for your ex to do that in the first place so if they happen to change their mind straight afterward or stop contacting, then it’s OKAY.

Your ex just needs TIME to absorb and take all this new change in!

Don’t RUSH!

Look, I know what it’s like when you can’t stop thinking about your ex, when you feel there’s a big deadline over your head, that you need to “Do something now”, to somehow get them back or you’ll lose them forever, or they’ll just forget about you.

I will tell you that in my system, the steps within are spaced out very methodically, so the tactics work the most effectively.

You need to know, WHEN it’s best to contact, WHEN it’s best to show interest and WHEN it’s best not to and WHEN to recognise “interest” on their end, or when it’s “something else”.

Being too hasty will make these tactics less effective.

So remember, if you feel “desperate” and on edge because you need to get him or her back quickly… then STOP.

Stop before you pick up your phone and call or text your ex. Stop and think about it before you send a letter or get too eager at the fact that your ex is talking to you and setting up “dates” with you.

Being too hasty will slow your progress or sometimes make you go backwards.

For Steps On What To Do, Click Here.

If you’re using Facebook, make sure you have this plan with you to help take you to the NEXT step.

I’ll be thinking of you,

Until then,

Ashley Kay

P.S.

Remember to use the Facebook tactic with this plan for faster results.

P.P.S.

Don’t have The Facebook Report I’m referring to here? Download it for FREE here.

1/3 of Americans have experienced a break up at least once in the last 10 years.

Those less than 35 are twice as likely to break up compared to those between 35 – 55, and 5 times as likely as those 55 and older!

It’s no surprise really that young people are break up “experts” and probably go through a break up on average once every year.

Interestingly, when asked who initiated a break up, 50% of women confessed to initiating the break up, while only 29% of men admitted they initiated the break up.

There is clearly a fuzzy line on “who” wanted to break up first.

Here’s why that is happening…

1. Unfortunately, men are conflict-avoiders for the most part.
2. Unfortunately, women wrongly assume breaking up with her man will “make him work harder to chase her”.
3. Men tend to be more complacent with staying in a relationship than women

So… if you’re a woman and YOU initiated the break up, BUT it was because you felt you were pushed into it for whatever reason, it’s probably because your man wanted it that way.

If you’re a man… well your woman probably couldn’t tolerate things as readily as you could.

Interestingly, one of the BIGGEST cause for break ups is NOT infidelity or lack of romance/passion.

It’s in fact: Lack of COMMUNICATION.

If you had solid communication with your man or your woman, you’d  be on the same page about your boundaries and expectations of the relationship.

What this means is, don’t wait months and months for conflict to build up and wonder why all of a sudden: “He is going out more and more”, or “She is flirting with other men” or “He hardly talks to me anymore.”

Communicate DAILY on:

• What your plans are (for the day, week, year etc)
• Where conflict arise (this is a debate, NOT a one-sided argument)
• What you find sexy about your partner
• What you’re currently excited about in your life

Don’t let the communicate twiddle to nothing because you don’t know what to talk about or you’re afraid you’ll upset him or her, or whatever other reason you may have.

Don’t become a break up statistic… Get Him Back… Get Her Back…

Ashley