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To clothe or not to clothe: Why industry oversexualisation turns away female gamer-folk

2012-02-16T18:47:00.000Z

Girl gamers? I understand your pain.

You’re torn. You're conflicted. You're unsure. On one hand, you love videogames for all the obvious reasons. They’re fun. They’re pleasantly addictive. They come with a rich and popular culture. On the other, they’re often shallow. They can be sexist. And more often than not they send heroines into battle with naught but a thong to guard them.

I hear you, sister - men are pigs.

It's no secret that video games have developed a bad reputation amongst non-gamers for creating a gallery of shallow, oversexualised female characters. Snobbish fans of other entertainment mediums hang their hats on this; they love to point out that whilst our heroines seem to be paid by the midriff, there wasn’t a navel to be found in Citizen Kane. Our favourite industry has leapt many a hurdle since its economic genesis in the mid 80s, bounding repeatedly and with quantum leaps towards fully-fledged artistic respectability, but characters like Lara Croft, Cammy, Sivir and hundreds of others hold it back.

If you’re a man, pick your favorite male protagonist. Someone cool, and heroic (if you can't think of anyone, go with Han Solo). Now close your eyes and imagine them as accurately as you can. Make sure to account for every detail - their height, weight, stance, clothes; all of it. Once you've got a clear image, pin it down in your mind. Got it? Good.

Now have that character meet your gaze.

Now give him a speedo.

Now make him dance. He seems different now, doesn’t he? At the very least, he's less badass than when clothed. Do you still want to cheer for that character; want to lead him into dangerous battle? That’s how I imagine women feel about their videogame heroines.

Anybody who’s spent a summer of adolescent sexual tension at theatre camp knows that a character is only as good as his or her costume. You immediately realise that Malcolm Reynolds is a bona fide hero because his outfit screams 'space pirate'. We all know that a worn leather jacket + weathered brown fedora + ripped khaki adventurer's shirt = caution-to-the-wind, globe-trekking archaeologist. Combine face piercings, a hooded leather jacket and a $10,000 shopping spree at Hot Topic and what do you end up with? The troubled cyberpunk genius Lisbeth Salander, from The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. These are just a few iconic characters that to some extent are defined by what they wear, by how they are presented to us.

So when a game company dresses their leading female character in a slutty bikini covered in knives, what do you think of them? Are you struck by their intelligence? Do you think they could be a doctor, or a philanthropist? Maybe a Congresswoman? I bet Margaret Thatcher wore her medieval G-string to work.

As a fan of good storytelling, I have trouble viewing scantily-clad warrioresses as real characters. They’re too impractical to be real people. Too shallow and robotic. Their existence makes me turn off the PS3; turns me away from their products. And I’m not the only one.

To be fair, there are plenty of videogame heroines with the two-hit combo of clothes and personality to choose from. Alyx Vance, from Half Life 2. Chell, from Portal. Zelda, from the Legend of Herself. Samus Aran, from Metroid. Jill Valentine, from Resident Evil. Faith, from Mirror’s Edge. Jade, from Beyond Good and Evil. Female Shepard, from Mass Effect. There are plenty of respectable women-folk to be found in the great game character sisterhood. But at the end of the day it's the gun-toting, skin-baring, Victoria's Secret model look-a-likes that seem to get the most attention.

By continuing to loudly voice how much we the gaming community enjoy seeing these clothed, believable female characters in our games, perhaps we will convince game developers guilty of oversexualising their female characters into changing their tune. If we stand together as consumers and call for more independent, badass lady-folk in our games, we might get them.

But as long as the videogame industry allows companies to create games about X-rated beach volleyball, it will remain barred from the lounge of artistic respectability, and therefore continue to press its hands longingly against the window as it watches art, film and literature converse tastefully amongst one another whilst wearing smoking jackets, puffing on expensive Cuban cigars and mahogany smoking pipes.

It's up to us to keep demanding respectable female characters in our games, brothers and sisters. We’ll slow the creation of over-sexualised video game heroines yet. And I don’t care if that lingerie is made of diamond-coated mithril tungsten - it’s not going to stop that swarm of arrows flying full-speed at your crotch.

GGTL Live presents: Mass Effect 3 demo livestream

2012-02-15T11:40:00.002Z

It's only a matter of weeks now until we get our hands on the conclusion of the Mass Effect trilogy, and that time isn't approaching fast enough.

Fortunately for our own sake, BioWare has blessed us with a demo of Mass Effect 3 today, which you should go and download right now. However, maybe between your last minute Valentine's Day shopping and your busy schedule you aren't going to find time to immerse yourself in a simple taste of what's to come; that's where we come in.

Join us on Wednesday, 15th February at 8pm EST for the livestream in North America via our Twitch.tv channel.

Just like our Diablo III livestream, though, we haven't forgotten about our main folks over in the UK! Your livestream will be at 6pm GMT on Friday, 17th February

Commentary will be provided by yours truly, and Linford Butler will join in on the action on Friday's stream. Get ready for some dead aliens, because... well, that's just what I do.

Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning, and why it needs your help

2012-02-14T19:28:00.000Z

Can you remember the last time that a brand new intellectual property got you excited? For me that was Demon's Souls, back in 2009. The truth is that every single year there's a plethora of new brands, like Demon's Souls, that appear on the market. Unfortunately, few truly make it, and even if some get that taste of success, oftentimes the game will soon after quietly fade into obscurity.

Kingdoms of Amalur is hoping to break this formula with its audacious attempt at melding several genres. What kind of fate awaits 38 Studios' first title? That's up to us. And I'm here to tell you why you need to care.

Take one look at Amalur. It doesn't seem very special, does it? A third-person RPG akin to Fable, with an unmistakable MMO vibe? If you were like me, you wrote this game off right from the start. However, 38 Studios released a demo for the game and I decided to see it for myself. As the demo finished downloading, a friend and I were entirely prepared to sit down and bash the game. I mean, it was just going to be another derivative fantasy world with a terrible subtitle, right? Reckoning? Hah! But something magical happened as we began traipsing through Amalur; we had absolutely nothing berating to say.

My personal anecdote aside, Amalur is surely one of the biggest surprises in recent memory. Its intrepid design philosophies follow a unique path by attempting to mix several genres that normally wouldn't ever be whispered together. It takes open-world cues from The Elder Scrolls series, a questing system similar to World of Warcraft, dialogue options from Mass Effect and Dragon Age, combat mechanics from the likes of Devil May Cry and Fable, and a whole lot more from other various titles. Say what you like, but this kind of over-ambitious design is what can kill a game. Amalur's vision is certainly grandiose, but as ridiculous as it seems on paper it comes together in a package that is extremely enjoyable and accessible to absolutely everyone.

Unfortunately, just being fun isn't good enough for a game to continue its natural progression into DLC and then, perhaps, a sequel. Developers need the coin, and if something doesn't sell then we simply don't see it again. If you couldn't already tell, Amalur is a myriad of ideas and gameplay functions that come together in one beautiful motion. More than that, it's something we haven't seen before, something brand-spanking new, and we owe it to the developers to give it our attention.

Why do we owe it to 'lower-class' developers to support their games? Think about it. If we don't show interest in companies extending their reach into unused regions, which allows them to experiment with other imaginative ideas, we'd get what we've been getting every year - more Call of Duty. That isn't to say in any way that the this particular series is terrible, but since it has become a multi-billion dollar juggernaut it's been obvious that the games have been degrading in quality over the years. Yet people are still buying them. As this trend continues, Call of Duty will eventually meet the fate of both the Guitar Hero and Tony Hawk franchises. Both were phenomenal in their own right, and both were completely wiped out as a result of pure over-saturation and diminished quality. Saying that, there's no reason to embrace something that's sub-par in the quality department, but Amalur is far, far from that.

The biggest reason I'm such a proponent of this game is how much effort 38 Studios has put into it. Huge names like R.A. Salvatore, Ken Rolston and Todd McFarlane are all on board the Amalur train and, as with the examples above, it's obvious that the developers have learned from contemporary games about what works and what does not. Implementing these features is one thing, but making them work and actually enjoyable is something else entirely. You also cannot forget the demo, which is what sold me in the first place; how many games give you a feature-length demo with an open-world to do what you want with after the showcase has ended? Not even Red Faction: Guerrilla's original demo allowed its world to be traversed, and that game was all about roaming around. If that's any indication, these guys want you to explore their game; to do what you want, when you want. For that, I have immense respect.

Playing into the hand of ignorance and literally judging a game by its cover, like I did, can condemn a series in a heartbeat, and that's why a game like Amalur really deserves your attention. Is it the be-all and end-all RPG of all-time? No. Of course not. But Amalur is a familiar world set with seminal design, and it's fun to boot. Ignoring something like this only brings harm to the industry as a whole and yes, I know that the retail prices for games hurt nowadays, but just ask yourself what you're picking up this year.

Give Amalur a chance. Because we all know what happened to Okami. And I do not want to get into that again.

Review: Goldeneye 007: Reloaded

2012-02-13T15:35:00.003Z

GoldenEye 007: Reloaded

Developer

Eurocom

Publisher

Activision

Platforms

Xbox 360, PlayStation 3

Reviewed on

Xbox 360

Genre

First-person shooter

Certificate

PEGI 16+, ESRB T

Best price we found in GBP:

£17.99

from Play.com (UK)

Goldeneye. The name alone conjures images of four (often more) warm bodies crowded around a single television set, thrilled by the concept of gunning down their friends for the fifth hour running.

Perhaps this isn’t your experience with the game, and you enjoyed it more as a counterpart to one of Bond’s strongest cinematic offerings, engaging in espionage action as only Ian Fleming’s famous gentleman spy could. Regardless of how you enjoyed Goldeneye back when it was released in 1997 (and Activision is betting that you enjoyed the hell out of it), Eurocom’s new reinvention of the Goldeneye name lives up to the spirit of Rare’s revolutionary console shooter, even if the execution sometimes falls short.

Goldeneye 007: Reloaded is a high-def port of 2010’s Goldeneye 007 for the Wii, which updated the game’s story and gameplay while staying true to what makes Bond different from other action heroes. Eurocom also overhauled the multiplayer, adding online competition to the first game’s fabled split-screen, bringing new modes into the mix while retaining other established classics. It was a highly praised bit of software when it was released, and Reloaded is a great opportunity for non-Wii owners to experience one the best Bond games in recent years.

Penned by Bruce Feirstein, co-writer of the original 1995 film, Reloaded’s story is an updated take on Bond’s attempts to stop terrorists from acquiring and using a weaponised satellite, the titular Goldeneye. Much of the narrative remains true to the movie, though changes have been made; the plot no longer involves the Soviet Union, for example, and there are many more references to today’s political landscape. It’s a clever remix of the fresh and familiar, and remains a satisfying tale with only a few small holes (Reloaded ditches the 9-year gap present in the original movie, making some character motivations a bit murky).

Gameplay is better in line with modern shooting conventions; Bond uses ironsights to aim his weapons, and only carries two armaments at once, though he also keeps his signature Walther PPK on him at all times. Where Goldeneye 007: Reloaded diverges from contemporary shooters is in its mission structure. Throughout the game, Bond is given objectives to complete, with additional tasks added on higher difficulty levels, ranging from photographing evidence to destroying arms caches. The emphasis on accomplishing more than simple survival helps Reloaded to feel less like a corridor-shooting simulator, and more like an actual secret mission.

Another way Goldeneye 007: Reloaded stands out from the modern FPS pack is in its emphasis on stealth. Bond is a covert agent, after all, and the game gives him many opportunities to use sneakiness over brute force, taking out enemies using silenced weaponry and avoiding detection where he can. It’s a fun way to mix up the bog standard shoot-all-the-baddies scenario, and several achievements and trophies are awarded for completing levels without being detected. In many cases, stealth can be the preferable option; if detected, enemy soldiers call in about half a regiment's worth of reinforcements, all exhibiting much higher levels of AI than regular guards, and more than happy to flush you out with grenades or flank your position. In this way, Reloaded strikes a favourable balance between action and stealth, allowing stealth aficionados a chance to sneak around to their heart’s content, while always offering an option to go balls-out if the player so chooses.

Bond’s mission takes him from Dubai, to St. Petersburg, to the infamous dam from the first game, and most of the areas are pleasing to the eye, though not the best-looking of 2011. Reloaded is never quite successful at hiding its Wii origins, and many levels lack the polish found in today’s graphically heavy blockbusters, like Uncharted or Battlefield. Still, the game's environments often show several nice artistic flourishes, like the constant snowfall in Severnaya, or the mountain overlooks in Nigeria. Goldeneye 007: Reloaded also updates the original game's cast, replacing Pierce Brosnan with Daniel Craig, and Sean Bean’s Trevelyan with, oddly, Ptolemy from Alexander. It seems like somewhat of a step down for me, but the cast is fairly on-point throughout, especially Craig and the ever-reliable Dame Judi Dench, who provides the voice work for M during mission briefings.

The single-player mode is quite good, but the multiplayer is truly what made the first game shine, and while Goldeneye 007: Reloaded doesn’t do anything to dethrone the reigning champions of the genre, it’s still a hell of a lot of fun. Four-player split-screen is as addictive as ever, and online has expanded to sixteen-player skirmishes, making every match frantic and intense. Reloaded’s multiplayer eschews weapon pick-ups for customisable loadouts, giving players an incentive to unlock weapons and add-ons, but taking away from the strategy of finding placements for the best guns. Reloaded also brings back old favourite modes, like 'Man With the Golden Gun' or 'You Only Live Twice', placing them alongside game types found in other shooters (King of the Hill, Conquest, etc.). Good luck finding anyone who wants to play anything besides Team Deathmatch online, though.

Reloaded could easily have been a nostalgic cash-grab, using the Goldeneye name to prop up a flimsy game for easy money. Not so; Goldeneye 007: Reloaded is a fun, modern take on the Nintendo 64 classic, and while it's unlikely that this new version will become as infamous as its forebearer, it’s a fun throwback, and a reminder of how satisfying a game protagonist Bond can be.

8/10 [?]

GGTL Live presents: Diablo III beta livestream

2012-02-07T20:51:00.002Z

While it's been out for a while now, it's pretty tough to get sick of seeing more of the Diablo III beta. To celebrate this ravenous hunger, we at GGTL are committing to a live stream of the beta (with commentary of course) for both the USA and UK this week. New to the series? Have questions? Just want to see the game in action? Well friends, stay a while and listen.

We will be broadcasting via Twitch TV and will begin the stream for the USA at 8pm EST on Thursday (2am GMT).

If after that you haven't had enough, we will then be broadcasting at 6pm GMT (12pm EST) on Friday for the UK. Please bring any questions you have and we will field them during the play session! Fortunately I have the dignified glory in hosting this event so get ready for extremely lame jokes along with relentless demon killing.

Thanks in advance for coming to this most prestigious event. Be back here on Thursday at 8pm EST for the start of the festivities and all the goodness you simply can't get anywhere else!

Six reasons to be excited about Resident Evil 6

2012-02-02T19:05:00.000Z

I am unabashedly a fan of Resident Evil. Ever since I walked into that creepy mansion in the outskirts of Raccoon City I have been hooked, having played and owned every single main game in the series.

Like every long-running series, the Resident Evil franchise has had its highs and lows, but when all is said and done, you would be hard pressed to deny that Resi is an iconic series, birthing characters and game mechanics that will go down in the gaming history books.

As you can probably tell by now, the announcement of a new Resident Evil game, to me, is nothing short of a gaming event. Consequently, when Capcom officially announced Resident Evil 6 a few days ago I felt like a kid in a candy store, and my excitement only grew once I laid eyes on the fantastic trailer. But I don’t want to be the only geek on this hype train; I want you right there with me, so here are six awesome reasons that prove why you too should be marking Resident Evil 6's release date on your calendar.

Reason 1: Mr Badass Protagonist, I'd like you to meet M. Badass Protagonist the second

For a series with famously horrific dialogue, it is surprising that Resident Evil has somehow managed to create such endearing and iconic characters. The series' core protagonists have evolved over the years, developing individual character arcs which (although convoluted) have managed to overall make a weird sort of sense. These characters have somehow managed to overcome their many flaws, including their imposed dialogue impairments, and ingratiate themselves with gamers worldwide.

Such are the cases of Chris Redfield and Leon S. Kennedy. The first has been the stalwart male protagonist of the series since its inception, and has gone from being an overwhelmed, cardboard cut-out, clichéd cop character, to a man with a mission in life, deeply affected by the rollercoaster of trauma that has surrounded him for years. The second, the rookie Raccoon City cop with the Bieber haircut, was literally transformed into a badass before our very eyes, whilst still being perhaps the most relatable of all of the series characters.

Resident Evil 6 will make series history by putting these two characters in the same game together. That was the collective gasp of Resi fanboys around the world which you just heard.

Reason 2: a story Bond would be proud of.

I have a somewhat love-hate relationship with Resident Evil's story. Most of the time, the yarn crafted by the cooky guys at Capcom isn't much more than soap opera fare. However, over the years I've found myself engrossed in the mythos of Resident Evil. I read up on the characters on wiki sites, enjoy the multiple conspiracy theories bouncing around the internet, and try to keep up with the ever-expanding history of the evil Umbrella Corporation.

The point is that what started out as a simple 'night of the living dead' game has morphed into a whole world, featuring espionage, intrigue and worldwide bioterror. I love it, and I can't wait to see just what Capcom has up its sleeve, especially with a game reported to follow three protagonists in branching yet intertwining storylines, which will see our protagonists in locales around the world. Time to update those wikis fanboys.

Reason 3: Ada-freaking-Wong

We first heard of Ada Wong all the way back in Resident Evil 1. Apparently the girlfriend of one of the scientists working in the mansion lab, Ada's name was said scientist’s computer password. Poor dope. As the series progresses we encounter Ada in both Resident Evil 2 and 4, and learn that she is somewhat of a superspy, working for one shadowy organization or another, in an attempt to obtain information and samples of the bioweapons at large.

The quintessential femme fatale, Ada Wong is an incredibly memorable, scene-stealing character, who was an absolute joy to play as in Resident Evil 4. The Asian sensation is poised to make her comeback in Resident Evil 6, and will be playable. Huzzah!

Reason 4: Survival-horror? Action? Does it matter?

The feelings I first experienced when I first played Resident Evil 5 are hard to describe. It featured prominently on my screen; both Chris Redfield and Jill Valentine, the series’ original protagonists, were featured in the game; horrifying mutated dogs were lunging at my neck; all of the ingredients that make up the Resi recipe seemed to be present. But it just didn’t feel like a Resident Evil game. It very quickly dawned on me that the survival-horror which defined original Resi games had been replaced with non-stop monster-killing action. Solitary walks down confined corridors, with nothing but a single clip of ammo and your trusty knife were out; co-op and no-holds-barred kill fests were in. Although this transition had been initiated by Resident Evil 4, the definitive jump made by Resi 5 was somewhat jarring. In the end though, I didn't really care.

The fact of the matter is that Resident Evil 5 was a good action game. The game mechanics of the original Resident Evil games were starting to show their age, and a change was needed. The series was turned on its head, and no-one can say that's automatically a bad thing. Resident Evil 6 seems to be pushing that action envelope even further, and to Capcom I say go for it. They gave me Megaman; I trust those guys.

Reason 5: Co-op Madness?

Six player online co-op? Six players, controlling six Resi characters, facing a horde of the series' best monsters? Although this has not yet been confirmed by Capcom, the rumour mill is running at full force, encouraged by a post about the game featured on Xbox.com. The post has since been removed, but if there is any truth to the rumour you should be excited; very excited.

If you have played the mercenaries mode featured in Resi 5 with a friend, you know how addictively fun co-op Resident Evil madness can be. Adding four more of my pals into the mix is a stroke of genius if you ask me. I’m in.

Reason 6: Zombies!

Watch the trailer. Zombies are back. Rejoice!

Whipple's reject awards for 2011

2012-02-01T06:48:00.059Z

The year came and went, just as it always does, and for those of us in the gaming press, that means the requisite 'best of' lists must make their appearance.

Trust me, it's for everyone's own good.

However, with a myriad of games lying about that I still haven't played to their fullest, I'm not one for rolling out a conventional list of the best games in each genre. That's something you can find on literally any webpage and I'll leave it to you and Google to solve those differences. Instead, I've put together groups of games that surprised me in various ways, both good and bad. So if you're coming here to see Skyrim at the top of the list, or perhaps to justify your purchase of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3, you'll be disappointed.

Most controversial

2011 wasn't without controversial titles. We're not talking games that showed too much skin, or brought to light the subject of sex and marriage, such as Catherine. We're talking about games that had their own communities up in arms due to the very nature of how the game was created. You either liked it or you didn't.

Dragon Age II

The sequel to one of the great RPGs of this generation, Dragon Age II had quite a lot going for it. Unfortunately, instead of expanding upon the universe Origins set in motion, BioWare opted to confine the game into one large area and streamline the combat system—effectively 'consolising' the game. Some enjoyed the simplified combat, eliminating the need to pause the game multiple times during more-elaborate combat scenarios. However, Dragon Age is the spiritual successor to Baldur's Gate, practically making elaborate combat a necessity to maintain that relevance.

Regardless of where you stand, Dragon Age II was as divisive as it could've been. Whether it was the simplified combat, samey environments or uninteresting characters, everyone disliked something about the changes. Maybe BioWare was rushed to complete the title, maybe not, but many still hold Origins as the superior game today.

Dead Island

Techland's Diablo/Left 4 Dead/Borderlands approach to a zombie game was as ambitious as it was a technical mess. There's a lot to like about Dead Island on paper: loot, hordes of zombies to kill, levelling, cooperative play, etc. However, the game was, and still is, plagued by an equally horrifying number of bugs and game-stopping glitches. The PC version was actually released with a previous, unfinished version of the game, rather than final game code. Imagine picking the game up to realise you're actually playing a game that can't be finished because it's 'not quite done yet.'

Dead Island has made several fixes to itself, but that's no excuse. Releasing a game people want to like but can hardly play is a criminal offense to gaming as a whole. At least when it's working it's pretty damn good.

Most disappointing

You don't want this to happen to your favourite franchise, but alas, sometimes there's no avoiding it. These are the games of 2011 that failed to deliver a genuinely excellent experience, despite the hype surrounding them. It hurts even more when their predecessors set them up for success, and they still tank.

Brink

What a letdown. Brink was a showcase title on the bleeding edge of technology that everyone wanted to play. Not only did it implement a great-looking parkour system and tremendous aesthetic design, but the team combat and objectives looked satisfyingly unique as well. Touting a campaign that others could join with or against you at any time, Splash Damage looked like they were on their way to crafting a grade-A shooter we'd all still be playing come the new year. How wrong we were.

We covered Brink, twice actually, and its anemic campaign was a focal point for our anger. As it turns out, there was no story in Brink whatsoever, and the multiplayer was little more than a bare-bones version of better games, like Team Fortress 2. The game can be found in bargain bins everywhere, so if that doesn't tell you anything, help yourself.

Red Faction: Armageddon

Considering my love for Red Faction: Guerrilla, I absolutely couldn't wait for Armageddon to release. Showcasing new technology, weapons and a gritty environment to play with destructive tools, Armageddon appeared to have what was needed to succeed. Little did we all know that the genius of Guerrilla wouldn't come close to being matched in this mediocre follow-up.

Alright, Armageddon isn't THAT bad, but when you're in the shadow of such a free-spirited and plain-fun game like Guerrilla, you're expected to do something similarly great. The Magnet Gun was the single most amazing thing to come from it, but even that was overshadowed by the confining underground environments of Mars. That, coupled with the repetitive enemies and ridiculous story, made Armageddon a tough game to accept. Also, there's a unicorn that shoots rainbows out of its ass. We're done here.

F.E.A.R. 3 (I'm sorry, it's actually F.3.A.R.)

My channeled hate for games that throw a number in as an acronym will never cease, but in this case there's a lot more to hate about F.E.A.R. 3. The gameplay is completely different than previous installments of the franchise. How so? Let's try ditching conventional methods of combat we've been used to and instead implement trite Call of Duty features like regenerating health. Sound great? I didn't think so.

F.E.A.R. was always about atmosphere, a decent story and its pretty excellent AI. All of that has vaporized in the sequel and... oh yeah, Monolith didn't even make this. Moving on.

Rage

Id Software is a pioneer in PC gaming, but Rage is something they should be quite ashamed of. While the PS3 and Xbox 360 version ran alright, the PC version (you know, the stuff they're know for) was released in a very broken state. After several weeks id managed to get the game working again for the majority of users, but by then it had been beaten with the console stick. What do I mean? The PC was stuck with the low-res textures of the console versions and according to John Carmack (id Software), they had no intention of releasing a texture pack to clear up the mess. Awesome.

Look closer. That's some pretty amazing stuff, right there.

Being one of the PC owners of Rage, I orchestrated my own set of violence as I wasted several hours attempting to get the game to run in a functional way. Eventually, I received a patch that allowed me to play the game, but the rest of my experience wasn't without further issues. Simply put, the game was not optimized for the PC (which is heresy for id). You couldn't even change any of your internal settings like a normal PC game until the patch hit, and even after the choices were barren. Compound that with Nintendo 64 textures, pop-in loading, one of the most surprisingly uninteresting worlds in recent memory, and you'll get a generic shooter called Rage.

Was it because Bethesda published the game and forced id to go with the console over PC version? There's no way to know for sure, but the truth is within the product, and I advise you to steer far, far away from it.

Duke Nukem Forever

There was no way this game was going to live up to the expectations set for it and everyone knew it. So we'll just leave this one here as-is. Enjoy.

Most disappointing studio

Just because you release one of the best games of the year (Skyrim, for those keeping score at home) doesn't mean you get a free pass to publish a plethora of awful titles. Brink? Rage? Hunted: The Demon's Forge? Yeah, they were all trash, and no, it doesn't matter that you didn't develop them. As a publisher, you are still putting your name behind the material and are thus just as responsible for the outcome. One excellent game does not give you a free pass, my friends.

Best comeback

Dynasty Warriors 7

The Dynasty Warriors series doesn't have the best reputation among gamers, but I'm still a guilty follower of the franchise, despite the fact I haven't been fully pleased since, perhaps, Dynasty Warriors 5. When I first heard this game was coming out I dismissed it entirely, but as the release date crept up I found myself eying the features more and more. Brand new story mode that follows the actual characters of the kingdom? Interchangeable weapons? An RPG-esque upgrade system? A brand new conquest mode? Online co-operative play for the first time? I was sold.

I hated the redesign of the characters in Dynasty Warriors 6, and only a few titles in the series had a sense of weight behind each strike of a weapon. DW7 shocked me by offering an excellent feel to the combat while keeping it addictive with upgrades and new weapons. In my review, the new take on the story mode was the star of the show and my feelings still haven't changed. All in all, Koei has done a masterful job at reincarnating a stagnant franchise and I can't wait to see what the future brings.

Gears of War 3

As some may probably know, Gears of War 2 underwhelmed me wholly. The standard campaign was riddled with contrived writing and uninteresting moments. Boss fights were practically meaningless, and the introduction to new enemies and story elements didn't impress me. Considering the embarrassing multiplayer, Gears 2 was seemingly a catalyst for the series' demise. Hopeful as I was, I just didn't see Gears 3 bringing the franchise back on track. Thankfully I was wrong.

While it does have its problems, Gears 3 is definitely the best game in the series. The four-player drop-in cooperative play is an excellent addition to the gameplay, and the fully-fleshed out character development really helped make some of the protagonists feel more real than they ever have. Epic also took the time to hone the multiplayer experience, giving us dedicated servers as well as the new Beast Mode, Horde 2.0 and a working, fun, competitive multiplayer experience. Hats go off to Epic for keeping their promises.

Mortal Kombat

Wait, wait, wait. Mortal Kombat is relevant again? You better believe it!

Most underrated

Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine

Relic always brings out the best in development when it comes to the 40k universe. Space Marine was their very first attempt at creating a third-person action 40k game and they certainly didn't disappoint. Riddled with alarming detail, every single second you're playing this game you'll marvel at the attention Relic has paid to the system. The particle effects, combat noises, voice acting, everything sounds and looks superb. It also helps that it's pretty damn fun to play as well.

I reviewed Space Marine earlier in the year and gave the game a rather generous score. Not only does it provide a satisfying campaign, but it also throws in some decent multiplayer that will keep you busy for hours. It doesn't have the longest campaign, though, and if you know nothing about Warhammer 40k, you could be put off by the game appearing to be ostensibly similar to everything else out there (which it isn't). Space Marine isn't the greatest game, but it's definitely something worth playing.

Resurgence of excellence

Resident Evil 4 HD, Metal Gear Solid HD, Shadow of the Colossus/ICO HD

While Resident Evil 4 is the only downloadable title of the bunch, the rest are also available at a wonderfully-low retail price. If you haven't had the chance to play these classic titles you owe it to yourself to pick them up. Now.

Most unfortunate name

Ceaseless Discharge (Dark Souls)

Doesn't the name say it all?

Opinion: Whipple's personal top ten games of 2011

2012-01-30T20:44:00.000Z

The end of the year is always a hard time for a videogame journalist. Not only do we have to recall every experience we've had over the course of the year, but we then need to match each title up against one another, like some kind of digital Mortal Kombat tournament, in order to find that elusive 'game of the year'.

Keep in mind that this list is my personal favourite games of the year, not a list of the 'best' or most popular out there. That means some of the more abstract titles out there might take the place of the greater ones.

Let's start things off with a game that was neglected, but is great in its own way.

10: Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine

Space Marine is a third-person action shooter with combat mechanics similar to Rocksteady's recent Batman titles. It is Relic's first attempt at approaching the franchise using this genre and they did a fantastic job. The detail was extraordinary and, whilst the campaign was pretty short, the multiplayer served as a fun distraction with its competitive and co-operative elements.

It drops in at number ten for numerous reasons. Whilst it did the 40k universe justice, I felt that the campaign could have had more combat variety. The weapons, despite being brutally satisfying, were very limited, as were the combat moves. The multiplayer also lifted many of its features from games like Call of Duty and Gears of War's Horde mode (Exterminatus). Despite those shortcomings, Space Marine successfully tied together satisfying mêlée combat with solid shooting mechanics. Couple that with jaw-dropping executions and beautiful environments, and you have a sleeper hit on your hands. I can't wait to see what Relic does with this franchise.

9: Bulletstorm

Bullestorm is a unique first-person shooter that focusses on killing with skill. Generically shooting enemies to progress is out, and performing perpetually-interesting moves to decapitate, obliterate, incinerate or otherwise maim your opponents is in. Also, dick jokes.

Bulletstorm received massive criticism due to its humour and absurd format of first-person shooting. Sure, the funny bits were pretty dry, but think of it like the movie Snakes on a Plane; the whole thing is one big joke. The shooting is also rather great, but you can't play it like a conventional shooter where you shoot a target dude until the life bar depletes. Bulletstorm doesn't work like that, and if you play it as such, you'll despise it.

For me, Epic's extremely under-appreciated title pleased me with its style and surprisingly funny dialogue. Never did I think a FPS could change the formula into such a winning concoction. Using the environment to manipulate and slaughter your opponents? It might not be for everyone, but you'll never know whether you love it unless you give it a spin.

8: Orcs Must Die!

Robot Entertainment's Orcs Must Die! is a third-person tower-defense-esque game in which you control a Warmage. A really stupid Warmage. Your master slipped and fell on the steps, thus leaving you to fend off the relentless assault of Orcs who are seemingly allergic to fire.

Seriously. I heard one of them say it.

Whilst tower-defence games are literally a penny a dozen, Orcs Must Die! provides an excellent variation on the genre. By utilising traps instead of towers and allowing you to fully control a character who can use various talent trees and engage in either physical or magical combat, this game stays fresh for its duration. Throw in extra levels, traps and monsters via DLC, and you have a game that you'll be playing for hours upon hours, and for a ridiculously low-price too. Trust me when I say that Orcs Must Die! is one of the best in the genre.

7: Dark Souls

From Software returns with the brutal successor to the PlayStation exclusive, Demon's Souls, 2011's Dark Souls. Bordering on ridiculous as far as difficulty goes, Dark Souls takes you into a unique world where you must combat demons and all other forms of monstrosity with very little assistance. Survive long enough and you might just become stronger to journey into the next room. What's that you say; you died at the hand of a skeleton? You're screwed.

Next to Bioshock, the Souls titles are the most atmospheric games I've ever played. The art design, the ambiance; everything about these games screams style, and it works. Dark Souls is terrifying and that's mostly because it's a game that embraces a lost style: discovery. As you continue to discover more and more about a certain region, you begin to understand the game itself better, as well as your limits. Never have I felt so rewarded for defeating a tough monster, and so betrayed in dying to a standard enemy. Although the multiplayer was broken at release, Dark Souls is such a unique experience that you do yourself a disservice if you miss out.

6: Dynasty Warriors 7

Have you ever laughed out loud at a game on the brink of release? I certainly did with Dynasty Warriors 7. A notorious joke within the industry, countless Warriors titles have released, and hardly any have been in any way worth praising. Surprising as it may seem, Dynasty Warriors 7 is the exception, and has unbelievably steered a sinking ship in a respectful direction. Yes, it's still a hack-and-slash game and, yes, it still has some pretty bad voice acting, but I'll be damned if I don't say that Koei did an outstanding job with this one.

As detailed in my review, one of the biggest selling points for me was online play, a first for the series. Even better, Koei actually took the time to refine the gameplay and eliminate the fluff that the series was known for. The story mode for each kingdom was confusingly addictive and the cut-scenes were crafted in a delightful way. With hours upon hours of relatively simple gameplay, Dynasty Warriors 7 was probably the biggest surprise of the year.

It also contains the best capes in gaming. Seriously, take a look.

5: Gears of War 3

Having composed the final entry in the Marcus Fenix story-arc, Gears of War 3 is the end of the story that all Gears fans know. Until this point, Gears had its highs and lows, but this game truly delivers on all fronts. As emotional as it is fulfiling, this is the definitive example of how a series should wrap things up.

It's hard to think that the third entry is Epic's swansong for the series. Whilst it most definitely won't be the last game we see in the Gears universe, Epic has done a fantastic job of sending it off. Four player co-op? A refined multiplayer experience with dedicated servers? A skilled author composing the story? Everything Gears of War 3 brings is the best of the series, and the only way you'll know is to play it yourself.

4: Dead Space 2

Renowned engineer Isaac Clark and the very angry Necromorphs both return in the much anticipated Dead Space 2. Having lost seemingly everything in the Ishimura incident, Clark wakes to find his nightmare renewed and, of course, he's the only one with the knowledge to stop the growing threat. Scary, atmospheric, technologically superior and, most of all, fun, Dead Space 2 is a worthy instalment to one of the better third-person titles available to gamers.

To this day, Visceral's creation is yet to be matched by an equally-fun and jump-worthy third-person shooter. The first Dead Space took many of its cues from the superb Resident Evil 4, but while that series has somewhat lost its course, Dead Space has evolved with the rest of the gaming industry and put out an incredible sequel. Although its multiplayer is forgettable beyond measure, the single-player experience never wavered in quality, and that's what really matters.

3: The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

Every Elder Scrolls game is huge, and Skyrim is no exception. Taking cues from the ways that games have changed, Bethesda has streamlined their seminal franchise to cater to all types of play-style and gamer. Couple that with an intriguing story, beautiful technology, and discovery elements that have been lost since Morrowind, and you get Skyrim, one of the best games of the year.

I have yet to finish an Elder Scrolls game, but Skyrim might just be the first game to break that mould. It certainly has its faults and glitches, but even those are not enough to sway my recommendation. You can play this game however you want, and with the death of the awful, awful level-scaling system present in Oblivion, even I can enjoy this game.

2: Mortal Kombat

You're reading the words of the most loyal Mortal Kombat fans out there. Yet, I never thought that Mortal Kombat could drag itself out of the abysmal hole that it dug itself into. But I was wrong. If you know nothing about Mortal Kombat - and if that's the situation, shame on you - understand that this game's accessibility is unparalleled and contains everything that made the old games memorable and great. Which largely means that Liu Kang isn't a zombie this time.

Foregoing the 3D style and retracing its steps back to the original days, Mortal Kombat is a masterclass in what a fighter should be. Not only does it give you the best story that any fighting game has ever seen (no, seriously, play it), but it is also loaded with unlockables, challenges and DLC that doesn't suck. The only thing holding this game back from perfection was its rather awful online component. Constant disconnection is enough to dissuade anyone from trying to compete online, but if they can get this right next time, then I can't wait.

1: Bastion

You might laugh, but my number one game this year is a downloadable title that will take you less than ten hours to play through. Regardless of its duration, you cannot measure the importance of quality in a game, and Bastion achieves that quality to the highest degree. Supergiant Games hasn't created a great title, they've created an incredible one.

Akin to some of my old favourites, such as The Secret of Mana, Bastion is an action-RPG that knows the ropes. Everything from the music to the combat feels right, and the story is mysterious enough to make you want to continue on your adventure to discover more about its surreal environment. Whilst it isn't the longest, deepest, most addictive or largest game out there, Bastion is composed so professionally that anyone can get into it. Saying that, if you've yet to skim the surface of this exceptional game then please, do so. Now.

Interracial one-liners and burnt rubber: why Driver: San Francisco was the best thing in 2011

2012-01-25T19:08:00.001Z

Late to the party, you say? 2011 may be dead and buried old news, but forgive me; I've only just built up the courage to say what I'm going to say.

You see, I'm not a man with splitting opinions, a vicious tongue or a mind for devil's advocacy. I like what I like, and generally that tends to be what everyone else likes. You'll find no 'Homefront was the bestest game evar!' antics from me. But in a year that granted me the gift of Batman: Arkham Asylum, the cherished delight of Portal 2 and the unforgettable, unconquerable, unbelievable Skyrim, amongst a glittering sea of celebrated gems, it was a coma-fuelled carmageddon that gave me the greatest joy.

Driver: San Francisco is a throwback in pretty much every way possible. The story itself harks back to the vibrant, garish and funky, beat-heavy 1970s, where everyone was either pushing coke or doing dope or being a dirty cop or doing something illegal and slightly hilarious. There's also the gameplay, which doesn't burden the player with muddy motion control, sloppy shooting mechanics or faulty free-roam. You drive, and occasionally you'll press a button, move the camera over another car, and press a button. Then you drive again. It's pure, clean and fresh. Whilst most modern titles cram the back of their game boxes with trademarked UltraCrap™ features ("now with 50% more green-brown textures!"), Driver had you, a car and a beautiful city. To top it all off, this is Ubisoft Reflections' last attempt at reviving the lifeless and much spat-on corpse of the Driver series; from the golden age of the ultimate PS1 cop-chase emulator, Driver has fallen hard, shooting itself in the foot with the awkwardly-titled Driv3r and then proceeding to maul its own limbs off in desperation with Parallel Lines and 76. When it was announced that the latest Driver would be a retro throwback to San Fran's heyday, all coddled up in the mind of coma patient John Tanner, eyebrows raised. When the game released, jaws dropped.

Well, mine did at least. See, 2011 was a wonderful year. Not if you were a dictator, or a Middle Eastern rebel, or near an earthquake hotspot, or Amy Winehouse, or pretty much anyone else in this sickening world slowly trudging to your inevitable anti-climactic demise. But, for videogames at least, it was damn exciting. Needles plunged into eyes in Dead Space 2, robots plunged into fiery pits in Portal 2, elbow-daggers plunged into cyborg motherboards in Deus Ex, and Skyrim plunged the world into a fury of 'Fus Ro Dah'-ing and wishing their cats could dual-wield. There was fierce competition, no doubt about it. But Driver: San Fransisco stole my heart and drifted across the Golden Gate bridge with it. And I'll tell you why.

You knew what Dead Space 2 was all about. If you had hands, or even eyes, well before your clammy palms had caressed your controller of choice you knew Dead Space 2 was about kicking alien ass and taking alien names. Maybe you'd completed Dead Space (2008), or just played the demo, or even caught a fleeting glance of a trailer, but any semblance of surprise had been squandered long before you ever played it. You knew how it would feel to decapitate an otherworldly head, and fly about in zero-gravity, and what Issac would say, do, think, whisper, murmur, smell like; the corpse of Dead Space 2 was examined and pored over long before its release into the big wide world. All the grand games of 2011 had the same issue: hyped beyond excess, with endless trailers, walkthroughs and interviews to feast upon, your appetite was spoiled before the main meal. I'm a huge Skyrim fan, and the game itself is unconquerable colossus of scale, and yet killing my first dragon didn't feel all that special. Because only a few months ago, I'd watched Todd Howard do the very same.

Driver: San Fransisco didn't have that problem. I'll choose my words carefully so I don't offend any hardworking Ubisoft employees, but... how do I put this? The game was shoved into a grimy corner to die a lonely death. Advertising was basic; no grand statements spilled from Martin Edmondson's - creative director - mouth; there wasn't a new trailer every thirty seconds. I knew a bit about the game, but I certainly hadn't followed it with the same wide-eyed vigour as I had with the better-endowed releases that came before it. It was brilliant.

When I got the game, seamlessly swinging sideways around San Francisco's sunbathed streets was an absolute thrill. Leaping from car to car in comatic fury was a real joy, whilst the good-cop/bad-cop (or in this case, white-coma-cop/black-sassy-cop) relationship - filled with sharp one-liners and just enough homoerotic tension to emulate all those 70s buddy movies - was riotous fun. With no expectation or preconceived notions, Driver: San Fransisco had an empty stage on which to wow the player, and it did so with all the tricks it could stuff up its sleeve.

The crux of the game had to be the side-missions. The main plot was tongue-in-cheek, bizarre, over-the-top brilliance, with interweaving threads of stolen ammonia and hospital beds. But to keep you interested, there had to be stuff to do, and I'll happily hold my hands in the air and claim that Driver: San Fransisco had the best side missions of any game I've played for a long, long time. Whilst Skyrim had you traversing endless load screens as you fast travel, enter a building, talk for a bit, leave a building, fast travel, find some treasure, fast travel, speak to a guy, and so on and so forth, Driver makes every side mission an attention-grabbing, emotionally-involving rollercoster. Who could forget Jun and Ayumu, clumsy Korean kids who accidentally get themselves embroiled in vicious street-races? An ageing truck driver nearing retirement who is caught up in a Speed-style bomb threat? An unfortunate husband unwittingly driving an adulterous wife to a lesion with her lover?

They each had spirit. They each had flair. They each had soul. Every single one of them felt crafted, sculpted and born out of love, and you find yourself becoming more and more involved in these characters with every lightning-fast second. I shouldn't care about these people! Whole games devote themselves to creating sympathy with a block of pixels, yet fail with a fizzle; Driver: San Fransisco, with a sharp script and colourful characters, grabs you and doesn't let go.

That's without retracing the fleet-footed main plotline, that's so brilliantly tongue-in-cheek yet straight-faced that you can't help but admire Ubisoft's gumption. Going from the meandering countryside roads of automobile shifting fun, through narrow back-alleys of genuinely disturbing plot twists ("Christ - he's everywhere!"), hurtling down the open highway of one of the most thrilling climaxes of the year - Driver was an utter joy to behold.

There are hundreds of honestly superb games out there. Games with blockbuster budgets, Spartan-sized teams and the community's eyes focussed dead on their every move; these types of games are wonderful to play and technically proficient. But when was the last time a game rocketed out of the blue and knocked your socks off? When was the last time you were properly, genuinely excited by the game you were playing, full of wonder and possibility and brimming with the unknown? Nowadays, those games are harder to come by. And all the more incredible for it.

Second Opinion: Modern Warfare 3

2012-01-23T20:57:00.004Z

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3

Developer

Infinity Ward

Publisher

Activision

Platforms

Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, PC

Reviewed on

Xbox 360

Genre

First-person shooter

Certificate

PEGI 18+, ESRB M

Best price we found in GBP:

£32.91

from Amazon.co.uk

At this point, most gamers know what to expect from a series like Modern Warfare; a competitive, multiplayer-driven experience with an explosive - albeit meteoric - single-player campaign tied in.

This formula hasn't changed with Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. After all, what would a holiday season be like without another Call of Duty game? I couldn't fathom it either.

Following the fallout between Infinity Ward's lead designers and Activision, many thought that the departure of most of the studio would bring about the demise of the Modern Warfare brand. Yet, the game you know and love remains intact. Immensely intact. In fact, that's my one issue with the series that touts itself as the "best-selling game of all time"; being afraid of change.

How so?

A word of warning: if you haven't played the previous Modern Warfare games, you'll more than likely have absolutely no idea of what's going on (then again, even if you have you might fall into the same category). Following the events that transpired in Modern Warfare 2, the Russians have invaded America and continue to rain destruction down on the eastern shore. Makarov, the man behind the whole 'destroying the world' thing, is still at large, and you need to kill him so that the US and Russia can make peace. There it is.

Yo, yo, yo! Check out this sentry turret man!

Being candid, the campaign for MW3 is as cinematic as it is disappointing in almost every category. Without giving away major plot points, this game follows exactly the same formula that was given to us with the original Modern Warfare four years ago. Controversial issue arises, a main character dies and then you eliminate the main threat (or a notable one). This makes the story extremely predictable and shallow, especially during the cut-scenes, where the whiteboards, post-it notes and other information is basically flung at you from seemingly nowhere. These moments remind me of a standard CSI episode where the team has come to a dead end and then, miraculously, someone finds something and the case is busted wide open. Of course, when it comes down to it, all you need to know is that you need to shoot people. A lot of people.

There are few things that don't blow up as you climbing your way to the objective in the campaign. Missiles flying overhead, buildings collapsing around you, ordnance being detonated nearby - I can't deny the adrenaline rush that MW3 offers. A quote I recently heard describes it best: "if Modern Warfare 3 were a movie, Michael Bay would have to retire." Sure, in some ways the game makes great use of action and definitely stirs excitement, but Activision and Infinity Ward have been pulling the same strings for a while now. I understand they're trying to recreate the same effect that the original Modern Warfare had on the masses, but by literally utilising the same story-arc again and again, the game just ends up seeming plagued by lazy design. It'd be one thing if the story were at the very least interesting, but sadly this just isn't the case.

You are the Juggernaut.

Multiplayer, on the other hand, offers a much better experience in MW3 than its predecessor. Whilst MW2 gave us the superior co-operative Spec Ops mode along with a slew of new perks, equipment and kill-streaks, MW3 refines it all, creating a nicer overall package. As far as I'm concerned, Spec Ops is once again the star of the show. If you've never played it, Spec Ops is a two-man set of challenges that earn you stars for the difficulty you complete them on. Some missions may be completed alone, but if you're dead set on getting all 48 stars you're going to need a partner in crime. There's also a new Surivival mode, which pits you against waves of enemies, à la Gears of War's Horde.

The original Modern Warfare was where I sunk my teeth deep into the competitive multiplayer. MW2 felt bigger, but it was ruined for me by exploiters, terrible spawns and overpowered weapon sets. MW3 feels better to me, purely due to the fact that you're rewarded for staying loyal to certain weapons. What I mean is that you can actually level up your individual weapons, unlocking additional attachments and bonuses. For instance, leveling up the Riot Shield will give you the option to make it melee quicker or give you a speed boost.

Only novices shoot rockets. I think.

However, my favourite new additions to the multiplayer remain with the playlists and new kill-streak mechanics. MW3 offers the biggest selection of playlists the series has seen yet, including an all new mode called Kill Confirmed. Kill Confirmed's basic premise is that killing people doesn't automatically net your team points; instead, upon death your enemy will drop a dog tag and, if claimed, collection of that tag will net your team points. The cool thing about this mode is that you can grab your own teammate's dog tag, denying them the point. As far as kill-streaks go, they can still be fully customised, but can now be set to either Assault or Support streaks. Assault is your typical streak system which will end if you're killed prematurely. Support, though, allows your streak to persist through death. They aren't quite as devastating as the Assault ones are but it's still a rather nifty change that makes constant death less frustrating.

After that though, MW3 devolves back into its typical 'shoot everything, everywhere' format. It wouldn't be such a bad thing if MW3 were to have better spawns, but, alas, it does not. Couple that with an unbalanced matchmaking system and you have a real issue. The first game I played online pitched me against four people who were all level 80; about midway through the game, I was killed six times in a row without taking more than four steps from my spawn location.

MW3 isn't a bad game, but its lack of imagination and derivative nature will drive away gamers who want just a little bit more. Its nonsensical story doesn't help matters, but at least Spec Ops and a familiar competitive multiplayer element provide enough to keep coming back to. Having said that, this title is nothing more than average, but if you're a Call of Duty fan and shooting dudes is the name of your game, go ahead and add two to the score.

5/10 [?]

We can work it out: why Call of Duty and Battlefield should (and must) coexist

2012-01-17T19:00:00.001Z

For nearly the entire calendar year, the Call of Duty and Battlefield franchises have been at war.

Similar to the Sega vs. Nintendo days of yore, it’s a pitch, knock-down battle for supremacy; the two companies have launched ad campaigns taking none-too-subtle jabs at each other, and gamers are digging in and choosing a side, ready to defend their favourite franchise and see the opposition go down in defeat.

This has to stop.

Seriously, folks, I’m all for good, healthy competition, but what’s going on between Battlefield 3 and Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 is just plain ridiculous. It goes beyond competitive rivalry and turns into something out of bloody Amadeus. The antagonism on behalf of either franchise is colossally wrong-headed, and it would be in everyone’s best interest if gamers put down their torches and pitchforks, and let both games be.

First of all, this battle doesn’t make our industry look good. Though gaming has slowly risen to a place of prominence in the last five or ten years, it isn't yet quite as ubiquitous as movie-watching or listening to music, and there’s still plenty of room for outsiders to get the wrong idea about gaming culture. I can’t imagine it speaks terribly highly about our industry if its fans are willing to act like jackasses in defence of a multinational corporation, who would just as soon suffocate under their large piles of money than give specific attention to those dedicated to besmirching their competitor’s name. We’re just starting to be seen by the rest of the world as more mature; let’s act like we deserve to be treated that way.

I also can’t think of any other industry that pits its competition head-to-head in such a petty manner. At no point in 2006 did Warner Bros. point at 20th Century Fox and say "Hey! Our movie about magicians in the early 1900s is way better than yours!" Neither do book publishers declare that their new novel is 'better' than an already-established series ("puts James Patterson’s Women’s Murder Club books to shame!"), and whilst it’s hardly unusual for recording artists to enter into disputes, they rarely involve direct album comparisons. These industries appear more confident about their products, and about their ability to coexist with consumers. Fans may argue about whether Star Trek or Star Wars is 'better', but these discussions are most often held between consumers, which is a far cry from having a quarrel perpetuated by the films' own studios.

Besides, if you were to sit down and play both Battlefield 3 and Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3, you would quickly find them both to be different and complementary experiences. Battlefield’s multiplayer-focussed shooter offers much more in the vein of wide-open spaces and free-form combat options, whilst Call of Duty places a greater emphasis on tight, twitchy action. True, both games are modern military shooters with straightforward, set piece-driven single player modes, but they both accommodate largely different play styles, resulting in two different gameplay experiences.

Which leads me to my main point: it’s okay to like both. How very basic it sounds, but how true it actually is. Getting caught up in EA and Activision’s trumped-up battle of the shooters can be great fun, but it can also result in players missing an important truth: that both games are fun, top-notch experiences, and each is worthy of your time. Personally, I alternate between the two, depending on what I feel like playing. Perhaps you can only afford one game, and need to pick between the two; choosing one over the other is fine, but liking one game doesn’t preclude you from enjoying the other.

Perhaps I’m being a curmudgeonly sod, but the whole 'one versus the other' thing just smells of stupidity. Too much time, energy, and Metacritic User Score credibility has been sacrificed to a conflict that does not matter in the grand spectrum of gaming. Both games are out now. Buy them, or don’t. Like them, or don’t. But dragging out this pissing contest of a sales matchup is unnecessary, not to mention stupid.

Couples that Trine together, stay together

2012-01-17T13:00:00.004Z

I am a big believer in the positive aspects of gaming. I’ve defended my hobby both in person and on the net, and I truly feel that videogames can have a palpable, positive effect on people everywhere.

Recently, I was pleasantly reminded of this fact, thanks to the little downloadable game that could, Trine. Trine is a PSN game (developed originally for Windows PC) by Finnish developer, Frozenbyte. In the game you take control of three heroes, each of whom have been bound together by the mystical Trine. As a result of the magic spell of the Trine, a knight, a thief and a wizard are forced to share one body, and must work together in order to traverse platforms, solve puzzles and defeat enemies. The main concept behind the game is that you can - and must - freely switch between any of the three characters, but can only control one of them at a time, forcing you to use your head and think about which character’s ability you need to get past a specific challenge.

Trine was one of the first downloadable games I ever purchased. The game enamoured me with its beautiful graphics and its old-school, 2-D platforming; plus, since the game allowed up to three players to play locally, I figured it would be a great chance to convince my boyfriend to join in on the gaming fun.

It’s been a concerted mission of mine to turn my boyfriend into a pseudo-gamer of sorts. I have had varying degrees of success. Fighting games he can manage, as long as you don’t force him to choose more than one character. It still surprises me that, to this day, when I play Mortal Kombat with friends and they choose anyone other than Zub-Zero, I had forgotten that such a decision was even possible. Shooters have also been a success of sorts, and we’ve logged hours upon hours playing Resistance - it has become quite evident that shooting aliens in the face is something that makes us a better and happier couple.

Trine was one of our earliest co-op experiences, and I kid you not, gamers, but that game taught me more about us and our relationship than I care to recall.

Before we go further into this, there are a few things you should know. I am not what you might call a 'patient' gamer. If you see me flipping a switch, grappling off a wall and double-jumping over a fiery pit onto a platform, I expect you to do the same. Damn it, how hard could it be?! You just saw me do it, didn’t you? I sometimes forget that not everyone has been doing this since they were five.

Case-in-point: my boyfriend. The poor shmoe owned a Nintendo with a copy of Mario Brothers a few eons ago, and that’s basically where his gaming-jedi training ended. And, although talented in many areas – the man makes a mean apple pie - when it comes to games, a fast learner he is not. As you can imagine, in a game in which three heroes share one body, throwing two gamers into the mix only confuses things even further. Co-operation and communication are key. The players, like the characters of Trine, have to find a way to share the three heroes and their abilities, and act in unison towards achieving their goal.

I think it was maybe after the fifth consecutive time that I plunged to my death, after my significant other conjured a box directly over my head with the Wizard as I attempted to manoeuvre over some platforms, that I very seriously thought it was time to reconsider this whole 'relationship' thing. "It’s just a game!" he protested. "Why are you so lame at this!?" I yelled. It didn’t take much more than that, and a full blown fight was on. Over Trine. Over a game. But not really.

Turns out it wasn’t so much that we were having trouble communicating during our Trine gaming session, but rather we were having trouble communicating in general. I was not only an impatient gamer; the fact of the matter was that I wasn’t a patient boyfriend. As for him, it became pretty evident that he was hesitant to follow my lead during Trine, because, in a lot of ways, he wasn't too keen on following my lead at all. We had run into a problem here; a puzzle of considerable challenge.

Here’s the thing though. We both wanted to make it work. We both wanted to beat Trine, so to speak. Trine became a metaphor for our relationship and its creases. So we took a step back. We took an inventory of what our strengths and weaknesses were, and reassessed that puzzle. Long story short, we beat that puzzle and kicked Trine’s ass.

A few days ago, we started playing Trine 2. Every now and again, a random box will be conjured directly over my head. And yes, many a digital death has ensued as a result of his inherent noobness. But he’s getting better, and I’ve learnt to sit back and enjoy it all. I’ve stopped trying to turn him into a fully-fledged gamer (sort of), and instead I've begun to enjoy the simple joys of gaming with my significant other. As a result, the yelling to laughing ratio has been flipped on its head.

Trine, and gaming in general, has not only helped my relationship, but has provided me and my boyfriend with a hobby that not only allows us to spend time together, but that forces us to work together as a unit, to communicate or fail, that gives us ample opportunities to help each other succeed and to share triumphs. And that's certainly not bad for a pastime that has a reputation for turning us all into a bunch of antisocial loners.

Spike VGAs 2011 post-mortem, or: Suppose they had an awards show, and no awards were given?

2011-12-16T22:13:00.001Z

I want very much to say that this year’s Spike VGAs were the best they’ve ever been, but I’m not sure that I can.

Make no mistake; this year’s broadcast, which aired on the 10th November at 8:00pm EST, saw markededly clear improvements over previous years' instalments. The now bog-standard celebrity guests were, by-and-large, less awkward, with most sounding excited to be there, and several even giving off a genuine gamer vibe. Spike also finally found a competent host for the VGAs in Zachary Levi, whose ‘aw, shucks’ charisma helped sell even the most staid of material (oh look, a life bar joke in 2011). And the actual broadcast itself has become a well-oiled machine, shuttling between segments of the show and killer trailers with an ease that the Oscars could only dream of.

The problem was, though, that it was too well-oiled. In all of the fervour to promote new trailers, promote VGA-related competitions (“Check out how popular the VGAs are on Twitter!”), and Felicia Day’s noble-though-misguided backstage shenanigans, the producers failed to give attention to the actual reason everyone was there: the awards. During the course of the evening, all of three proper awards were given and accepted. Three. The first, Best Action Adventure, was given at the very beginning of the show, and nearly a solid hour and a half went by without so much as a peep about the other awards.

Actually, I take that back — they did mention sixteen other awards during an earlier portion of the broadcast, because they announced the winners in the form of a montage. To put this in perspective, more time was devoted to Kevin Jonas introducing the Rainbow 6: Patriots trailer than on the presentation of sixteen different awards. In fact, so much was lost in the shuffle that Spike didn’t even mention the winner for one of their categories (if you’ll check out the Wikipedia page, you’ll notice a blank spot for Best Team Sports game.

It’s kinda surreal, truthfully. I realise that the VGAs are starting to become a hot zone for announcing new games and showing off huge trailers, which, in all fairness, is pretty conducive to television, but Spike aren't even pretending that the awards matter anymore. I mean, fun as it was to watch Felicia Day play real-life Fruit Ninja with the cast of Comedy Central’s Workaholics, it felt disrespectful to all the major industry figures whose hard work was supposedly being honoured at the ceremony, a sentiment shared by more than a few actual nominees. Though, in terms of developer disrespect, nothing quite tops Michael Condrey of Sledgehammer Games getting teabagged for running over the time limit on his acceptance speech for Best Shooter.

Award neglect was certainly the largest problem this year, but it was far from the only one. As with any awards show, several presenters were absolutely dire during their onstage moments, particularly Jason Biggs of the American Pie franchise, who either did not care one iota about how obvious it was that he was reading from the autocue, or was simply stoned out of his gourd. Felicia Day’s Japanese game show-esque antics for Child’s Play were sound and admirable in concept (promoting a major game-related charity, and doing silly stuff for donations), but they killed the programme’s momentum whenever they popped up. And the aforementioned teabagging, which was funny as a concept-based joke, was simply terrible as an execution-based joke.

The most frustrating aspect of the VGAs, though, wasn’t the unfunny jokes or the awkward celebrities. No; it was the moments of actual, legitimate entertainment, the slight glimpses of what the VGAs should be. Case in point: The Legend of Zelda’s induction into the Videogame Hall of Fame.

Seth Green briefly talked about Zelda’s achievements, and then showed a video with clips from nearly every Zelda game, whilst a tasteful narration discussed some of the series’ finer points, including an acknowledgement of the game’s resonance despite the lack of spoken dialogue. After the video, the curtains opened, and who should walk out but Shigeru Miyamoto, who gave a charming acceptance speech in English to a standing ovation from the crowd. In another cool segment, Levi showed a video from Activision featuring Captain Price and Frost of Modern Warfare 3, saluting US troops and promoting a program to help veterans acquire jobs after they've returned from active duty. Moments like these tell me that, ultimately, the VGA producers 'get it', which makes the segues into rocky, stereotypical ‘gamer’ territory that much more painful.

Despite my negativity, I really do have hope for the VGAs. This year’s ceremony was ultimately stronger and less painful to watch than in previous years, and if the show continues to improve in the way it has, there is every potential that it might really be worth watching in a few years. Still, if the VGAs want to be taken seriously as an awards show, they need to focus more attention on the actual awards; to quote Justin McElroy of Joystiq, "if winning [a VGA] is ever to be a big deal, that has to start with you guys [the Spike producers] believing it is." ^[source] Even the MTV VMAs (the ‘award show as entertainment’ programme that the VGAs obviously wants to be, which is a perfectly fine goal) understand that winning is a big deal; if Spike wants to improve the VGAs for next year, I’d start there.

Review: Batman Arkham City

2011-12-14T15:48:00.001Z

Batman: Arkham City

Developer

Rocksteady Studios

Publisher

Warner Bros. Interactive
Square Enix (Japan)

Platforms

Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, Windows PC, OnLive, WiiU (2012)

Reviewed on

PlayStation 3

Genre

Action-adventure, beat 'em up, stealth

Certificate

PEGI 16+, ESRB T

Best price we found in GBP:

£24.99

on PC, from Amazon.co.uk

As comic book characters go, few have proven to be as captivating as the Caped Crusader, Batman. Be it his tragic origin story, his unparalleled fighting and detective skills or the sheer amount of kickassness that exudes from a man with no superpowers that can take on Superman, there’s just something about this character that has made him a staple of the comic book community for decades.

As tends to happen, the extreme popularity of the comic character has led to movies, animated series, tonnes of merchandise and - of course - videogames. In 2009, Rocksteady broke the licensed game curse, and created a Batman videogame unlike anything anyone had ever seen before. The boys and girls at Rocksteady care for the character, and poured attention and love into every single detail of the project, crafting more than just a game, but rather an experience. Batman: Arkham Asylum was more than just the best Batman game ever, or the best comic book game ever; it was one of the best games of 2009, full stop. This left this year’s sequel, Batman: Arkham City, with a rather unprecedented predicament: it ended up a licensed game with a large quantity of valid expectation for greatness weighing it down. Comic geeks and gamers the world over were wondering if Rocksteady would be able to strike gold twice.

The answer? Yes. God, yes.

You know the way that every sequel promises to be bigger and better, and then hardly ever is? That, luckily, didn't happen this time. Rocksteady hit the bullseye, and somehow managed to make the already pefect Batman experience even better, delivering a massive follow up to Arkham Asylum that is truly bigger and better in every way, giving you more of what you loved from the original and doing away with anything you hated. Fan expectations were more than met; they were surpassed entirely. This was clearly Rocksteady’s objective.

So how does a developer go about beating itself at its own game? Well, Rocksteady’s first order of business was giving players a larger playground to play in. Enter Arkham City, the mega-prison after which the game is named. If you’ve somehow managed to avoid spoiling the story for yourself already, I won’t spoil it for you here. All you need to know is that Quincy Sharp, former warden of Arkham Asylum, is now mayor of Gotham City, and he has somehow convinced the bigwigs of Gotham to let him wall off a complete section of the city and turn it into a prison. The result: a literal city prison, populated by every low-life thug, criminal and super-criminal in Gotham City. With appearances from almost every major nemesis in Batman’s rogue gallery (and a few not so major ones), veteran comic book writer Paul Dini has written a meaty, intense and suspenseful story that evokes a true sense of urgency in the player as the plot develops. The pacing of the narrative is pitch-perfect, and the game is filled with unexpected twists and reveals that will have you nerdgasming well into the night.

The game’s narrative is made that much greater by the excellent gameplay through which you experience it. Gameplay is divided into three basic elements: exploration, combat and stealth. Playing as the Dark Knight himself, Arkham City is yours to explore. As a gamer, jumping, gliding and grappling from rooftop to rooftop in an environment as vibrant and layered as Arkham City is a treat. As a Batman fan, the experience is just indescribable, and must be experienced to be understood. When you’re not mindlessly gliding around the city skies and freaking out at just how awesome Batman’s cape looks billowing in the wind, you’ll probably be meticulously scouring the environments for secrets or clues related to your current mission. Rocksteady has not forgotten that Batman is first and foremost a detective, and has made sure to feature Batman’s crime solving deductive skills prominently in the game, both in the main story missions and side missions, which I’ll get on to later.

As you can probably imagine, based on the fact that the whole game takes place in a megaprison filled to the brim with people that want our hero dead, you will get into a fair amount of scuffles. You will deal with your opponents either via direct mêlée combat or stealth. For the mêlée combat, Rocksteady has refined the amazing combat system they created for Arkham Asylum, the Freeflow Combat System. Freeflow combat sounds simple on paper: attack enemies with one button, stun them with another, dodge with a third and press a fourth button at the right time to counter. The truth of the matter, though, is that although the system is simple enough that a beginner can pull off some nice moves, this by no makes the game a button masher. If you’re going to call the Freeflow combat button-mashing, you might as well call Guitar Hero a button masher, and no, that is not an exaggeration. The key to successful combat in Arkham City is timing; you have to time each move to perfectly follow your previous move, counter just at the right moment, dodge exactly when required, all in an effort to boost your combo count and, consequently, the experience you gain from a fight. Perfecting Freeflow combat requires real skill. Add in enemies which require specific attack approaches, special moves and quickfire gadget moves – which allow you to incorporate Batman’s nifty arsenal into his combos – and you’ve got yourself an extremely robust combat system which will probably provide you with some of the most rewarding combat in any action title, ever.

Once you perfect the freeflow combat I guarantee you will feel like a ninja. But, alas, Batman - like all heroes - has a lethal weakness. For Superman, it's kryptonite; for Batman, it's guns - guns will kill the guy. Charge into a room filled with gun-toting goons, and you'll find yourself walking into the light faster than you can say "holy fatal wound, Batman". Armed henchmen require a more tactical approach; namely, stealth. Stealth (or predator) sections will require you to patiently wait in the shadows and use your wits and your gadgets to take out your opponents. Fear not, though, because the game arms you to the teeth, with everything from the must-have batarangs to explosive gel, freeze bombs, smoke grenades and zip lines. These stealth situations are also where you’ll make use Batman’s 'Detective Vision', which allows you to see through walls, in order to identify enemies and the weapons they're carrying. Each predator room is basically a puzzle that needs solving, with the answer always ending up as you doing a triumphant Batoosie dance over a heap of unconscious bodies.

Once you’ve explored, fought and ninja’d your way through the main story there’s still loads - and I mean loads - of things to do in Arkham City. The side missions prepared are just awe-inspiring, with most side quests featuring deep plots and their own villains. These optional quests will have you scouring the city solving The Riddler’s riddles, as lives hang in the balance; investigating a series of grisly murders; chasing down ringing phones in an effort to track down a psychopathic murderer, and so much more. With no hint of a joke, the side missions in Arkham City could be their own stand-alone game, they are that good. You also have the challenge rooms to occupy your time; these are Riddler Challenges, that either see you taking out waves of enemies with Freeflow combat, or clearing rooms of armed thugs in stealth missions. All missions are ranked online, with leaderboards and such, so you always have incentive to come back to these challenges and increase your scores. Add to the mix the addition of the newly re-vogued 'New Game Plus', which lets you play through the main story with all your experience and gadgets whilst considerably ramping up the difficulty, and it's easy to see that replay value is the name of the game. Oh, and I haven’t even mentioned Catwoman yet, have I?

Every new copy of Arkham City includes a download code, which will let you access the Catwoman missions. These missions are interwoven with the game's main narrative, so they seamlessly integrate with the main story. It’s true that you could play the entire game without experiencing the Catwoman missions and not feel like you’re missing out on anything, but trust me, you would be. Catwoman moves and fights completely differently to Batman, and playing as the famed femme fatale was probably one of my favourite experiences of Arkham City. Not only will these missions reveal more about what’s going on in Arkham City, but they will also reward you with some of the best gameplay the title has to offer. Long story short, download, and play now.

Rocksteady has also been generous with its offering of DLC. Already the company has released two DLC character packs, featuring Nightwing and Robin respectively. These packs allow you to play as these two members of the Batman family in all of the game's challenge rooms, as well as in additional challenge rooms included in the DLC. These characters can’t be used in the main game, which has disappointed more than a few fans; however, I can guarantee that each character is worth trying out. Both have a very distinct feel to them, in combat and in stealth missions, and they are more than just palette swaps, with distinct moves, gadgets and combat styles. At the end of the day, though, I’d say that you should only really get these packs if you have the cash to spare, or if you’re a huge fan of the characters, like me. Either way, you won’t be disappointed.

Lastly, I just have to mention how spectacular this game looks. The art style is spot on, and the game is brought to life with stunning graphics and vibrant music, every bit as epic as anything you’d expect to hear in Christopher Nolan’s Batman flicks. It’s the gaming equivalent of awesome sauce, and you know just how awesome awesome sauce is.

I read somewhere that Arkham City was more of a Batman simulator than a game, and I couldn’t agree more. Rocksteady has successfully, and fully, recreated the 'Batman experience' in gaming form, and if you know anything about Batman then you'll know just how much of an impressive feat this is. Batman: Arkham City is easily my favourite game of 2011, and a solid contender for Game of the Year. You owe it to yourself to play this game.

10/10 [?]

Christmas Season 2011: Gaming Recollections, part one - a very downloadable Christmas

2011-12-11T15:33:00.000Z

Happy December, everyone! In this month of year-end retrospectives and Oscar-bait films, we here at GGTL are beginning our annual Christmas content series.

In the past, we've had countdowns, poems and various other sundries celebrating the Yuletide, and this year, every Sunday until Christmas, I'll be offering my reflections on some of my past holidays in gaming. Christmas is a special, memorable time of year for all, and I hope you enjoy my memories of winter gaming gone by.

Part I – A Very Downloadable Christmas (2009)

Sometimes the best gifts come in small packages, or even no packages at all. During this Christmas, I was staying at my parents' house for the holiday break, thankful for the reprieve from what was a very gruelling senior year of college. My old bedroom had long been given to my younger brother, but I was able to set up shop in the back room, where my parents did office work. It was cozy enough, and though the sofa-bed I was using wasn't ideal, the area was mine, and that was all that mattered.

In the room was a small, 18-inch television that my step-dad used for watching his Second World War documentaries (like a typical History major), and with a little fiddling, I was able to hook up my Xbox 360 using an HDMI cable I found on Amazon for $3.50. Since it was the Christmas break, I had a good two weeks of free time to spend with myself, and in no time at all, I had set up my own little area: Xbox 360 and television, plus my computer and monitor set up on a chest I used as a foot rest. It was my own little corner, and I loved it so.

Christmas was quiet that year; we forwent the usual trips to visit relatives, and instead stayed at home. I didn't receive any new games for Christmas, but I took advantage of several Xbox Live holiday sales whilst barricaded in the office: specifically, Chair Entertainment's Shadow Complex and Stainless Games' Magic The Gathering: Duel of the Planeswalkers. I had just finished the first Assassin's Creed game before Christmas and, whilst I loved it, I was ready for something a little less grand in terms of scale. How ready I was, though, I wouldn't know until I fired up my two downloadable gems.

I had heard nothing but praise for Shadow Complex all summer, and I was excited to discover whether the game would live up to the hype. Fortunately, the game surpassed my expectations, utilising everything I loved about the Metroidvania formula (exploration-friendly environments, backtracking, item-collection, etc.), whilst excising all of the elements that I didn't (lack of direction, uneventful moment-to-moment gameplay, unintuitive exploration, etc.). Shadow Complex's two-dimensional environments were both simple and deep, letting me either explore as I wished, or follow the map screen to the objective. I never try to deliberately complete games like Shadow Complex to one-hundred percent - the over-exploration involved in finding that one last item tends to kill the experience for me - but that was just what happened during the course of my playthrough. So hungry was I for Chair's supremely satisfying platforming that I even completed all of the tutorials and challenge rooms after I had finished the main storyline.

After I finished Shadow Complex, I shifted my focus to Magic The Gathering: Duel of the Planeswalkers, another game I picked up on sale. As an avid Yu-Gi-Oh! player who dabbled with Magic during my sophomore year of high school, I loved the chance-elements and strategy of collectable card games, but lacked the financial capacity and encouraging community to ever play regularly. For the price of two-and-a-half booster packs, Duel of the Planeswalkers scratched my card-craving itch, giving me the opportunity to play against computerised opponents with fourteen different decks. Some reviewers cried foul concerning the game, due to its inability to create decks from scratch, but I appreciated the simplicity of pre-made decks and enjoyed simply diving in and playing.

Whilst I was playing my two downloadable goodies, I was using my computer to revisit two of my favourite animé series: the pulpy space opera, Outlaw Star, and the sci-fi neo-western, Trigun. Additionally, I was chewing through Stuart Hill's fantasy novel The Cry of the Icemark; hardly a challenging book, but the story was engaging, and the prose was to my liking. My winter break was heavy in escapism, but I can't say that I didn't need it; I had just completed my second of three nineteen-credit semesters, and a nice, long wallow in escapism was just what my over-tired brain was craving.

When told as a laundry list of what I accomplished, my 2009 Christmas season sounds pretty uneventful, but - truth be told - I wouldn't trade it for anything. My opportunities to do absolutely nothing are rare and far between, and to be able to relax and enjoy a trifecta of my favourite hobbies - gaming, animé-based nostalgia and imaginative, if under-taxing, fantasy books - was nothing short of memorable. More often than not, I need a holiday away from my holiday. That year, however, I got exactly what I needed: indulgence and rest, and I attribute no small part of my break's success to two of the best downloadable games I've ever played.

Guessing games: predicting the 2011 VGA winners

Predictions

Winner: Bastion
Dark Horse: Stacking

We really liked Bastion when we reviewed it this year, and newcomer Supergiant Games’ debut title’s inventive art and narrative direction should help it to take home a VGA. Insanely Twisted Shadow Planet boasted some of the most unique art of the year, but its basic (though still fun) Metroidvania design was less praised by critics. Trenched - recently renamed Iron Brigade - offered a unique, more action-oriented approach to tower-defence games, but was critically mixed. Double Fine’s other title, Stacking, has perhaps the other biggest chance to win Best Downloadable game, with a lengthy storyline, charming old-timey art direction and diabolically clever point-and-click adventure gameplay.

Best DLC

Nominees

Old World Blues for Fallout: New Vegas - Bethesda
Arrival for Mass Effect 2 - EA
Freddy Krueger for Mortal Kombat - Warner Bros.
Peer Review for Portal 2 - Valve

Predictions

Winner: Arrival for Mass Effect 2
Dark Horse: Old World Blues for Fallout: New Vegas

It is rare that a piece of DLC expands on a game’s single player mode, and rarer still is one that succeeds as well as Arrival, which not only acts as a satisfying chunk of standalone content, but also helps to bridge the gap between the current title and its sequel. Peer Review was free, but often lacks the magic of Portal 2’s initial campaign, and Mortal Kombat’s Freddy Krueger was about as close to fighting game horse armour as one could get. Old World Blues adds a quirky, 1950’s B-picture element to Fallout: New Vegas’ campaign, but its episodic nature could compare unfavourably to Arrival’s near-essential playing status.

Finally, after eight years, the VGAs have a nominee list that is one hundred percent respectable, with nary a 50 Cent: Bulletproof-calibre gaffe in sight. If Spike can get its collective hormones in order, without trying to pander to its previous notions of what ‘gamers’ will want to watch, this may well be the first year that watching the VGAs was actually worth my time.

The Spike Video Game Awards air live on Saturday, 10 December on Spike, MTV2 and Spike.com at 8:00pm EST.

Christmas Season 2011: Nine delectible gaming foods

2011-12-01T19:01:00.005Z

The holidays are finally here, and with that comes the requisite avalanche of food and tsunami of triple-A titles that you'll never have enough time to finish.

In honour of all of the edibles you're probably wasting, we at Gamer's Guide to Life want to recognise some of our favourite foodstuffs in video games. What better way to enjoy holiday nourishment than analysing the digital equivalent?

It may never have crossed your mind, but food is an important part of videogame design. Much like real life, without proper sustenance our avatars would shrivel up and disintegrate into the uncaring winds of the digital world. In fact, videogame characters would simply respawn, but that's beside the point. So, whilst you're diving deep into your household delicacies, take a moment with me to explore the food integration in these nine video games.

Energy tank

Found in: Mega Man
Believability: 9/10

The Mega Man games are known for their unforgiving difficulty, slamming music and, of course, Energy Tanks. The Energy Tank is basically your 'get out of jail free' card, as it refreshes your health before you become an unrecognisable hunk made formerly of man and machinery. Usually, they're found in hard-to-reach areas and secret passageways, but occasionally you'll get a lucky drop from a normal foe; when this happens, the accepted reaction is to joyfully scream like a small schoolgirl (if a girl is playing, the result is, instead, a manly football shout).

Mega Man is a dude made of lots of stuff. We don't know exactly what makes him tick, or what could be lurking underneath the lid of those rare E-tanks. Really, it could just be a gob of oil, Sour Patch Kids, or something weirder still. Whatever lightning-infused shock plasma liquid he throws down his gullet works, though, and I don't think anyone has any reason to argue.

Mushrooms

Found in: Super Mario
Believability: 7/10

There isn't a single Super Mario game that doesn't have the famed mushroom shuffling about in its digital depths. It was fairly obvious that this item would make it to the final list, so I'll make this as terse as possible. How does a mushroom make somebody grow? That's another debate entirely, and the answer is surely lying within another castle, but the real question you should be asking is how does each mushroom affect Mario? Green ones give him another go at life and the red ones make him healthier (in other words, bigger). That's how it works in Mario-land.

If you think about it, Mario doesn't have it that bad. Mushrooms are really very nice when sautéed with various ingredients and they can literally go with anything if you love them that much. Mario fetches these things out of boxes in all sorts of crazy environments, and fortunately for him mushrooms can grow practically anywhere. As for Mario getting bigger or gaining another life due to their properties, mushrooms certainly aren't bad for you, so I suppose they could aid in your growth. As far as the extra life goes, though.

Bananas

Found in: Donkey Kong Country
Believability: 8/10

Bananas aren't exclusively found in the Donkey Kong Country series, but they're certainly a heavy focus. Whilst you might question how bananas float of their own accord, collecting one hundred of the potassium-enriched fruits conjures up a free guy out of nowhere. Don't ask how it works, though; I'm a little more concerned about collecting them from industrial complexes, swamps and underwater.

The bottom line is that bananas are good for you, and the emphasis on collecting them in Donkey Kong Country shows that quite clearly. It might make little sense as to why a horde of creatures are after a bunch of bananas, but if Donkey and company were smart they'd just let the Kremlings have them. Why? Well, I'm fairly certain that ingesting bananas found scattered about an oil plant can't have any positive effects on you.

Assorted foodstuffs

Found in: The Elder Scrolls
Believability: 5/10

Skyrim has taken over the lives of the weak-willed here at Gamer's Guide to Life.com, but we who have somehow wrested ourselves away from its confining grasp tell of its plethora of assorted foodstuffs. Yes, every Elder Scrolls game contains a vast variety of food items, whether it be standard cabbage, carrots or a simple baked potato. The magic of this food presents itself, though, when you find yourself in a sticky situation. Defying the laws of everything, you can effectively stop time and gorge yourself, since each piece of food gives you up to one or two health points back without even having to leave the inventory screen. What does this mean? Well, that Black Knight who lifted his two-handed blade of killing to strike the final blow will instead find a refreshed and replenished adventurer before him.

Whilst there are people out there who make a living on the back of downing hot dogs and other foods within twelve nanoseconds, it's a little odd to see someone devour their entire collection of paraphernalia as their life flashes before their eyes. I mean, I have nothing against carrots or delicious baked potatoes, but something has to give. Unless it was recently discovered that cabbage has an alien, regenerative power, I'm fairly certain that an iron arrow impaling your body is a large concern. Fairly.

Pot roast and chicken

Found in: Castlevania
Believability: 2/10

There's little as enticing as a nicely-roasted chicken awaiting your arrival after a hard day of vampire-slaying. We complain about rude customers, inefficient co-workers or leaving work five minutes late, but how do you think the Belmont clan feels? Cursed to hold Dracula in perpetual check, these guys have to traverse demon-infested castles riddled with entire walls of spikes and other things that want to kill them. Injury is inevitable at this point, and what better way to heal wounds than to... eat a pot roast?

Assaulting a fortress of demonry is one thing, but asking to be healed by a chicken or a pot roast is something different entirely. First, it isn't like a ghost or some other angry, supernatural beastie is going to purposely drop a nice, fully-cooked chicken for you. Even if that does somehow happen (and it does, surprisingly often), the other way to find this miracle meat is inside the castle walls. That's right, you actually have to destroy the dilapidated remains of a castle wall to realise the possibility of finding a delicious chicken for you to devour. I don't know about you, but if I were trying to kill someone trespassing in my castle, I wouldn't be leaving culinary wonders in my damned walls.

Leaves and spray health

Found in: Resident Evil
Believability: 4/10

The Resident Evil games boast an impressive roster of murderous nasties. With zombie-sharks, -dogs and mutated beasts of varied poor dispositions all vying for a stake in your demise, healing is an absolute necessity. Despite how bad the injury looks or just how diseased the creature was that bit you, herbal leaves will always - and I mean always - do the trick. Crush 'em up, throw them into your stomach, and you're ready for another round of zombie-related injury. It makes about as much sense as a healing spray.

I'm no herbal expert, but I do know that there are some miraculous plants out there. However, I don't think these plants are dropped by a mutilated zombie, and I don't think they're going to be effective in treating several gunshot wounds and a bite to the neck. But I've been wrong before.

Meat buns

Found in: Dynasty Warriors
Believability: 3/10

What do you do when a thousand warriors stand in the way of you and your goal? The choice is obvious if you're playing any kind of Dynasty Warriors game. Killing hundreds of thousands of soldiers is a rough business, though, and even the most stalwart of warriors will eventually suffer from fatigue and injury. Enter the 'meat bun'. Whilst you might indeed be being chased by a horde of angry peons with pikes, you can easily heal those injuries instantaneously by ingesting one of these magical meat buns. Nor does it matter that you found it in a vase; just eat it.

Glorious as it must be to vanquish a thousand foes without ever breaking a sweat, that's easier for me to grasp than a meat bun healing all your wounds in an instant. At least, though, they had the decency to put the food in pots for the soldiers.

Assorted wildlife

Found in: Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater
Believability: 10/10

Probably the most plausible of the bunch, MGS3 thrusts Snake into the wilderness, where he must prey on local fauna in order to survive. I don't know about you, but eating a spider just to get through it all sounds tough. No thwacking a wall to discover a six-course banquet here; Snake's the real deal.

Fruit and ghosts

Found in: Pac-Man
Believability: 4/10

The classic circular character gobbles away at all sorts of things, including whatever those energy pebbles are, but what really gets him going is the various fruit bouncing about the map. Fruits that somehow have the ability to move downright scares me, but at least Pac-Man follows Donkey Kong's lead and understands what's good for him. That is, until he goes berserk and starts attacking the ghosts floating around his domain. I'm right there with you, Pac-Man; I don't want people trespassing on my property either, but to eat them?

The fruit stuff is perfectly fine, as it helps maintain a healthy lifestyle for the little man. However, eating ghosts? Not so much. How does that even work? You know, let's just forget about the whole thing.

Bonus: Souls

Found in: Soul Reaver
Believability: 0/10

Raziel, you can't just go around killing people and using their souls as nourishment. I mean, there are rules that need considering. Try something normal for once. Grab a bowl of cereal or someth... woah, woah, woah! Get away you devil demon! You can't...

Yeah, right.

Analysis: who will win Game of the Year for 2011?

Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3

Why it might win GOTY:

It's a brand new Call of Duty!

Why it might not win GOTY:

It's exactly like Call Of Duty 4. Again.

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

I'm not even going to talk about the game here. Instead, I'm going to ask you to look at Dead End Thrills. You'll see why.

Driver: San Francisco

Why it might win GOTY:

Best interracial back-and-forth of 2011.

There you have it folks. We'll know soon enough which of these games will come out on top, in the meantime, troll us below with your picks.

Review: X-Men: Destiny

2011-11-29T07:02:00.008Z

X-Men: Destiny

Developer

Silicon Knights

Publisher

Activision

Platforms

Xbox 360, PlayStation 3, Wii

Reviewed on

PlayStation 3

Genre

Action RPG/Brawler

Certificate

PEGI 16+, ESRB T

Best price we found in GBP:

£25.99

from Amazon.co.uk

I think the first time I tried to move the TV remote solely using the power of my mind was when I was about eight years old.

I’ve been dreaming of becoming one of Marvel Comics’ ‘mutants’ ever since. I would join the X-Men and become a hero, and be utterly and unapologetically awesome. Alas, it turns out that telekinesis is not one of my god-given talents; at least, not yet. In the meantime, I am left to live out my super-heroic dreams through comics, movies, and games. X-Men Destiny promised to be a cause for celebration for me and my inner eight-year-old, but, regrettably, the celebration consisted of a couple of awkward high-fives instead of the tribal comic geek dance that we had been anticipating.

X-Men: Destiny seems promising enough, as it sets out to tread the ground so many X-Men games before it have surprisingly ignored. Instead of letting you play as an established mutant hero or villain, the game casts you as a new mutant in the Marvel Universe, and allows you to choose your alliances, siding either with the X-Men or the Brotherhood of Mutants. This is a seriously great idea; what better way is there to get the wannabe mutants of the world to identify with a game character, than to let us play through our very own origin story? Sadly, although the premise is full of promise, the execution is a strictly mediocre affair.

The game starts off at a San Francisco peace rally, hosted by the government’s Mutant Response Division, the X-Men and the Mayor. All of the involved parties are hoping to quell the rising tensions between mutants and humans, as relations have hit an all-time low following a series of natural disasters, for which mutants have been scapegoated. Add to that the death of Professor Charles Xavier, and the disbandment of the X-Men, and things look pretty grim. As you can expect, the rally does not go as planned, as an apparent mutant attack sends the masses running for the hills. You stand somewhere in that panicking crowd and, as all hell breaks loose around you, your mutant powers manifest themselves for the very first time. The story offers several predictable twists and turns, but, for the most part, it isn’t half bad. X-Men Destiny offers up a true comic book yarn, which could have been pulled straight out of one of Marvel’s books. So what’s the problem? Well, the problem is the way the game wants you to believe the choices you make have some kind of effect on the story, when, in fact, they don’t.

See, at the beginning of the game, you’re prompted to choose between one of three characters: Aimi Yoshida, a young and spunky Japanese refugee; Grant Alexander, a football jock with a college scholarship (and, if you’re wondering, he is indeed a total douche); and Adrian Luca, who, as the son of a human supremacist, is arguably the most interesting of the three characters. Choosing who you play as is the first 'false' choice that the game presents you with, because the characters are so poorly developed that, regardless of who you choose, your experience with the game will be largely unchanged. Sure, Grant hits on any female character he can find, and Adrian has some serious daddy issues which pop up occasionally, but other than that, the game doesn’t really make you feel like you’re having substantially different experiences.

The same can be said of your choices of alignment with either the X-Men or the Brotherhood. Throughout the game you’ll encounter several well-known Brotherhood and X-Men members, many of whom will ask you for help with various missions and attempt to sway you towards their cause. As a fan of the comics, fighting beside Emma Frost was very different from fighting alongside Mystique, but for the casual gamer, I’m not quite sure the difference will register, largely because the game fails to make the missions offered by both sides feel any different. Most missions task you with taking out a given number of enemies, and regardless of who you fight alongside, you’ll smash through the same faceless lackeys and ultimately head towards the same goal. Having played through the campaign aligned with both the X-Men and the Brotherhood, it was utterly disappointing to choose differently only to find that I ended up taking on exactly the same mission that I had completed before. Talk about lazy game design.

As for the gameplay, X-Men Destiny promises to make me feel like a powerhouse of a mutant, and for the most part, I’m going to go ahead and confirm that this is achieved. Although the game is mostly a button masher, I must admit I did enjoy mashing said buttons, mainly due to the different ways that the game allows you to customise your mutant and his or her powers. At the start of the game, you’ll be asked to choose between three different power sets: density control, which will turn you into a brawler with the ability to encase yourself in obsidian stone; shadow matter, which will allow you to pull off some very acrobatic and quick moves (think a badass Nightcrawler); or energy projection, which will have you shooting shiny lights from your hands that blow stuff up real good. Each power set comes with a branching skill tree, which allows you to upgrade your powers with new combos and abilities, all pretty standard stuff. The real treats, though, are offered up by the X-Genes.

X-Genes are power-ups and upgrades you are awarded with upon completing missions. Think of them as genetic material belonging to your favourite X-Men characters, which you can equip to your character. There are three different types of X-Genes: offensive, which grant special attributes to your attacks; defensive, which ramp up your evasion skills and defensive capabilities; and utility, mostly passive abilities or movement upgrades, which grant you the power of flight or super-speed. If you’re playing with density control powers, you might equip the Iceman offensive X-Gene, the Emma Frost defensive X-Gene, and the Quicksilver utility X-Gene; this will cause your character’s hits to freeze your opponents, and allow you to run around the screen at super-speed with your body encased in diamond. Just that idea is pretty freaking awesome, especially for a fan of the comics.

One last bit of customisation comes in the form of the special suits you find. These suits are also inspired by the most famous mutants in the comics, so each of the three main characters end up with their own version of classic costumes, such as Wolverine’s yellow-and-blue costume, or Psylocke’s purple threads. These suits aren’t just for show, though. If you equip all of the X-Genes related to a specific character and also wear that character's suit, you’ll be able to activate X-Mode, which grants you a considerable power boost for a short period of time, allowing you access to the abilities and powers of the mutant whose genes you have equipped.

So gameplay is completely epic, right? Well, no: sadly, it isn’t. Although goofing about with your mutant powers is fun, the enemies that the game pits you against are just too darn repetitive and, frankly, dumb. The AI is a mess, and enemy variation is slim. You end up feeling like an Omega-level mutant taking on a bunch of Danger Room bots. Can this be fun? Certainly. Is it ultimately forgettable? Absolutely and undeniably.

Lastly, the game has caught a good deal of flak for its presentation, and it’s time that the record were set straight: it isn’t as horrible as certain internet folks would have you believe. The voice work is actually pretty darn good, and all the major players act and sound like you would expect them to, which is something I greatly appreciate. As for the visuals, there are two things to consider: the art style and the graphics. The art style wants to be great; a very cool animation sequence at the beginning of the game just oozes with comic book coolness. Likewise, the character's suits all look good and are faithful to the comic design – with the exception of the newly hippie Nightcrawler – and the main characters’ customised suit designs are pretty authentic as well. The problem is that the graphics just don’t do the designs justice. Character models are seriously lacking in detail and animation fluidity, and the hair, oh-do-not-even-get-me-started on the hair. Mutant powers look okay, with some decent particle effects here and there, but the environments you let your powers loose in are mostly drab and lifeless. All in all, the game is not hideous, but neither is it pretty by any stretch of the imagination. On the heels of Batman: Arkham City, a visually-uninspired comic book game is simply unacceptable.

If you are a fan of the comics, I say you should definitely give X-Men: Destiny a try. There is a certain rush to fighting as a new mutant alongside the likes of Cyclops, Colossus, and Emma Frost, which only an X-Men fan can entirely appreciate. I'd be lying if I said that I didn’t have fun with this game, though whilst X-Men: Destiny is a fun distraction, it doesn't achieve much more than that. If you’re looking for the next great action RPG or comic book game, your attention should be centred elsewhere.

6/10 [?]

You are not the Dragonborn

2011-11-25T16:24:00.002Z

The Belgian artist Rene Magritte has a valuable lesson to share with us all about the nature of video games: "Ceci n'est pas une pipe", or "This is not a pipe".

We see a pipe in the painting, but there's no pipe there. We see a picture of a pipe, but we cannot use it to inhale stimulants or clout our incompetent servants on the ear when they bring us the wrong brand of inhalable stimulants. Dammit, Jeeves, I only smoke Big League Chew, I don't care if the local tobacconist doesn't carry it or that it's actually children's gum in the shape of tobacco!

Likewise, when we play a video game, we aren't the hero. Take any of the Grand Theft Auto games, for example. Tommy Vercetti, Carl Johnson and Niko Bellic are men who exude a quiet confidence that commands respect from the lowest of criminal scum to the highest echelons of political power. But when you or I control them, these men are lunatics who blow stoplights by weaving between lanes of traffic at 80 miles per hour, not because they're being hotly pursued by Johnny Law, but because that stoplight is between them and a food cart that will allow them to eat 20 hot dogs in a row in order to vomit in front of my wife for her delight and disgust.

I have decided to bridge the gap between the simulated worlds that our characters inhabit and the certifiably insane ways in which we, the players, behave when we 'live' in them. I have chosen the ancient and noble art of fan fiction to aid me in this task.

Here, then, is a saga of Skyrim, featuring the words and deeds of the Dragonborn as he truly lived. And, indeed, as you truly play him.

The Miracle of the Sudden Cheese

From the Saga of the Dragonborn

Hark, and listen, for I tell you truly a tale of magic and miracle. Bright was the day and blue was the sky, when the strong-hearted Dragonborn came upon the modest village.

Blessings of Akatosh surely smiled upon Yngsir, Daughter of Yngsir, that day, for the Great Hero himself came unto her own home, and did grimly endeavour to conquer the stout lock that barred his entry, so great was his desire to make witness to the miracle to come.

"Damn," swore the Hero, and "Crap" was his oath, as a score of lockpicks shattered at the touch of his mighty fingers, as had so many foes fallen before his blade.

Fortune favoured the brave, as ever, for the hour of the day turned from 7:59 to 8:00, and lo, the stubborn lock relented and gave way at his touch, for this was the time of Many Locks Suddenly Opening, for reasons man may not know and the gods may not divulge.

The hoarfrost riming his beard gave way to the heat of the hearth, creating a mighty puddle, a cold-slick ocean of drips that would verily be a pain in the ass for Yngsir, Daughter of Yngsir, to clean.

Straight-faced and ruddy of hue, Yngsir, Daughter of Yngsir, greeted her honoured guest warmly, and boldly did she bear witness as the Dragonborn bravely ignored her and did honorably rifle through her possessions and spend many a minute flipping through her books.

But these shameful books pleased him not, and he spake aloud, saying in words of thunder: "Lame, no skill point upgrades."

Then did Yngsir, Daughter of Yngsir, feel a desire stirring within her to sit in a chair in another room, there to stare at the wall with great intensity and at great length, a pastime beloved of all peoples of Skyrim, for reasons man may not know and the gods may not divulge.

Strange sounds did she hear, a thumping and clattering as of chests being opened and middens being raided, but she stirred not, for such was her great love for staring at walls.

In time, she rose to find the Dragonborn, Great Hero of Our Age, standing before her, and he spake aloud, saying in words like the clash of glaciers, "You can keep this junk, it's too heavy to carry."

Then did Yngsir, Daughter of Yngsir, witness a great miracle, for lo, the Dragonborn suddenly emitted from his body a great bounty: weapons forged of iron, armour of leather and hide, many bottles of wine and a wheel of cheese most tempting to look upon.

Wherefrom did these things come, that they should appear as if from thin air in front of the Dragonborn and clatter to the ground in such disarray? So wondered Yngsir, Daughter of Yngsir, and so too did she wonder, 'Why do these miraculous goods look so familiar, like unto the goods I had carefully arranged upon mine shelves and in mine dresser?' Truly, it was a mystery, the reason of which man may not know and the gods may not divulge.

Yngsir, Daughter of Yngsir, known as Grimglare for her steely disposition, then gave birth to a smile for the first time in many years. For truly, the Dragonborn was as great a doer of deeds and bringer of wonders as the tales had told. Here, at last, was the man who would deliver her people from suffering.

"By the way," uttered the Great Hero, in words that rumbled like a herd of mammoths, "I accidentally killed your husband outside. I stealthed up and stabbed him with a mace because I thought he was a bandit."

"But it turns out he wasn't," sang the Dragonborn in words that roared like a great fall of water, "See you later."

- So ends the Saga of the Dragonborn's Miracle -

Have you enjoyed my tale? If so, perhaps I will share the story of the Dragonborn's Feast of Lightning. The Great Hero of Our Age was at the edge of death, when in the blink of an eye, the Dragonborn ate a score of foodstuffs, returning him to full hale hearth and heartiness from whence to deliver a killing blow to his astounded opponent.

"Ten cabbages and more have I eaten in the space of a moment's breath," spake he, "I cannot be defeated."

But that is a tale for another time.

Replay: Diary of an Online Noob - Round 1: Fight!

2011-11-24T20:27:00.000Z

I’ve been playing videogames for about 20 years now, and in that amount of time I like to think that I’ve become a pretty darn talented player..

I finish all my games, hunt down secrets and power-ups, and generally wipe the floor with would-be opponents. Admittedly, most of my opponents over the years haven’t been true gamers; for some unfathomable reason, most of my friends just haven’t been into videogames. So - as you can imagine - when one of the poor bastards picked up a controller and challenged me to a round or two, the results were pretty much invariable: Joey would reign supreme.

Although it’s arguable how fun these challenges truly were, one thing is certain: they led me to believe that I was some kind of gaming legend, unlike other gamers, unlike other men. Whispers were heard of my prowess the world over. I was great and I knew it.

Hell yeah, bitches.

Now, you should know I’ve never really been into online gaming. As a huge fighting game fan, most of my early online experiences were focussed on these types of games, which are utterly ruined by lag. With a bad internet connection at the time, I abandoned my online adventures. I have since upgraded my internet, but with the unpleasant taste that was left in my mouth by a laggy Soul Calibur IV, I was hesitant to try out the online arena again. Until recently that is.

It was a regular Tuesday night at home, nothing particularly out of the ordinary. I got home from work, made myself a ham sandwich and sat down to enjoy some quality gaming time. As I flicked through my collection, and deliberated what my game of choice for the evening would be, I found the whimsical sideway looks of Ryu and Ironman to have a particularly charming glow, and popped Marvel vs. Capcom 3 into my PS3.

My love for comics and fighters is well known here on GGTL, so it shouldn’t come as much of a surprise that I’m still playing the hell out of Marvel vs. Capcom 3. However, I hadn’t really jumped into the online experience of the game. I'd tried a fight or two, but normally signed out quickly, as soon as a hint of lag reared its ugly head. That Tuesday night, however, things were different. The internet and I were getting along brilliantly, and I was ready to take some noob kids to school. My first challenger - we’ll call him 'ScoobyNoob23' - did wonders to rouse my spirits. I stepped into the ring with She-Hulk, Trish and Captain America, and as I realised that 'Scooby' had chosen Sentinel, Iron-Man and Ryu, I simultaneously felt intense feelings of both relief and dread. Relief because the cheap Sentinel–Iron-Man combo is oh-so-popular amongst noobs, and dread because with his cheap characters, this noob might just beat my legendary skill down with some dumb luck.

'Scooby' never knew what hit him. I walked out of that fight with my three characters intact, and Scooby declined a rematch. 'Who’s next?' I thought, feeling like Daniel-san, post Mr Miyagi training. My next challenger popped up soon enough.

We’ll call him 'SoulCrushingRealityCheck85', or just 'EgoKiller' for short.

'EgoKiller' walked into the ring with Dante, Akuma and Zero, against my She-Hulk, Trish, and Captain America trio. She-Hulk is my heavy hitter; I start off most fights with her, and then leave her in reserve to deal out some heavy punishment if my other characters are taking too much heat. I blinked twice and she was down. As I felt the cold sweat travel down the back of my neck, I paired my Trish against his Dante, and after some grueling fighting, just as I was about to take that cocky, white-haired douchebag out, 'EgoKiller' switched him and came down on me with fury as Akuma. Poor Trish never stood a chance. Captain America was my last hope. A few charging stars and shield throws later, Cap’s lifeless body lay on the ground, looking up at me. I had failed my fighters, and I was pissed.

'I’ll get him on this rematch', I thought. Five rematches later, I had managed to take down one or two of his characters, but hadn't won a single match. At the end of my fifth utter defeat, a message pops on my screen: "Your utter incompetence is no longer amusing. You are no legend. Thou art nought but a noob".

Okay, what he actually said was "Good fights" as he signed out, but I knew what he really meant. I now had a personal vendetta. An arch-nemesis.

I watched YouTube videos of MvC3 during my lunch break at work. I stayed up until 2am, polishing my skills in the challenge and practice modes. And, three gruelling days later, I was ready. I had added 'EgoKiller' as a friend, waited for him to show up and challenged him to a game. As he accepted, my hands were shaking, but I walked into that fight feeling like Bruce Lee; this was a wild jungle but I was Stallone. Sure, this guy was my own personal terminator, but I was Sarah freaking Connor, and I was ready.

I cannot even begin to describe the utterly humiliating asskicking that followed. Nothing I tried worked. Those perfectly timed combos I had mastered? I couldn't even manage to set them up. As the fight ended, I pondered for a moment whether or not I should even attempt a rematch, but only for a moment. I was seeing red, and as our second fight started I attacked this guy with a fury. I used every cheap move I could think of, recalled every combo I ever learned, switched characters in and out quicker than I ever had. It came down to Zero and She-Hulk, and as that beautiful green lady delivered that final punch, the sheer elation of victory that filled my body was overwhelming. I jumped up and down like a two year old, and not even the soul-destroying pain I felt when I stubbed my little toe on my bedpost was enough to bring me down. I had won. I was legendary once more. This was what gaming was all about.

EgoKiller beat me to a bloody pulp in all of the next three fights.

I’ll keep fighting online, though. I’m craving that feeling of elation like a junkie. I’ve discovered online gaming and there’s no going back.

Ten reasons why Final Fantasy VI is better than Chrono Trigger

2011-11-21T23:45:00.001Z

The 'greatest game of all-time' contention is something that cannot be taken lightly, and a debate that we have often here at Gamer's Guide to Life.com.

Whilst the subject matter can spawn discussion on almost any game ever made, Final Fantasy VI and Chrono Trigger always seem to come up toward the top; right where they should be. Now, I'm not here to tell you which is better than which, but I'm fairly certain that Final Fantasy didn't stop at its second game, right?

That's what I thought.

Back in the nineties - or, as it is better known, the golden age of the RPG - the sheer might that Squaresoft held could not be denied. They were the company which could turn an emaciated goat into a stalwart knight, a rotten pineapple into a succulent steak, a worse-for-wear trainer into a hand-cannon. They were the people who lived in a shining fortress of awesome, surrounded by their unfathomable numbers of die-hard fans. You probably get it, but Square could do no wrong and, thus, Final Fantasy VI and Chrono Trigger were born.

Undoubtedly, both titles are known far and wide for their incredible gameplay and unrivaled soundtracks. The art, stories; everything about these games illuminates the darkest of corners, but I'm not here to tell you about how both of these games deserve the spotlight. Actually, I'm here to make a case against my fellow writer, Andrew Testerman, who claims that Chrono Trigger is Final Fantasy VI's superior in every way.

This view cannot pass.

Final Fantasy VI was a landmark for the critically-acclaimed series, as it's responsible for paving the way for the rest of the games - most notably Final Fantasy VII. While that game garners the majority of popular praise, rest assured that it would never have been the same without the cool-and-collected Final Fantasy VI at its heels. Final Fantasy VI also came out before Chrono Trigger, and still manages to contain depth that the games of today - including Chrono Trigger - struggle to implement.

Here's exactly ten reasons why the sixth installment of the Final Fantasy name is miles better than Chrono-whatever.

1: Espers

When there aren't any more Espers to find, Setzer and I have the same expression.

The Espers are the magical entities that make exploring the world of Final Fantasy VI such a blast. These creatures are living and breathing just like any character, but they boast unique magical powers that they bestow upon you by turning into an enchanted stone, called 'Magicite'. Some stones will simply be given to you, but there are plenty of others that must be found and/or earned before you can reap their benefits. It might all sound complicated, but once you get these little stones you can equip one to each character, which will teach you specific magical abilities, alongside providing special bonuses for levelling. With that said, you can also summon said Esper into battle. Depending on which you summon, the creature will perform either a devastating attack or a beneficial power upon your party.

What can you summon in Chrono Trigger? Not a goddamned thing.

2: The cast

Which other character is going to sing in an opera and then slay a God? Yeah, you tell them Celes!

Final Fantasy VI has a sprawling cast and is composed of exactly fourteen characters. These characters are all permanent, meaning you have many options at any juncture of the game. More importantly, though, these characters aren't faceless goons with the personality of a piece of sandpaper; every single person on the roster has a history, personality and emotional dialogue that will affect you throughout the course of the game. To this day, there has never been a cast this large in an RPG whilst simultaneously introducing characters you actually care and want to know more about (with perhaps the exception of Mass Effect 2).

What would you rather have; the measly seven characters that Chrono Trigger puts up? Sure, Frog is an interesting guy, with his heal requiring him to lick his friends and all. That's friggin' gross. Why not trade him for someone like Edgar Figaro, who uses some kind of steam chainsaw that has the ability to insta-kill enemies? Oh, and did I mention that when this chance comes up, he also throws on a Jason Vorhees mask? Final Fantasy VI is the clear winner here.

3: The music

Alright, alright: the music that both games boast is out of this world, but there's only one guy who can make a half-an-hour end theme sound this good. That man is Nobuo Uematsu, and he's responsible for these harmonious noises, and perhaps the best theme song of all-time. No kidding here. I mean, the man has his own rock band - The Black Mages - that recreates the music from the entire series. If you haven't had a chance to check out all three of their albums, I suggest doing so right after you're done reading this here article.

4: The world

Like most RPGs of its time, Final Fantasy VI has a sprawling world available for you to explore, with loads of hidden environments, characters and some unreal super-secret items. The game's steampunk style also adds some flavour that really captivates the essence of that fictional time-period. One should also note that the game opens up even more once you reach the halfway point. I really don't want to spoil what happens, but let's just say that the face of the world changes forever. Regardless, the best part is that there's always something for you to do, and when it's all over or nearing the end, you can go exploring and find hours upon hours of extra content that you never knew existed.

5: Limit Breaks - Desperation Attacks

One of the staples of Final Fantasy is the over-the-top and extremely flashy Limit Break manoeuvres made popular by Final Fantasy VII. Final Fantasy VI pioneered these Limit Breaks, by way of the Desperation Attack. Yeah, it isn't nearly as great as the stuff found in the other titles, but they are certainly satisfying to watch. Unlike the Limit Break systems you might know - getting hit to build a meter - Final Fantasy VI characters only perform these devastating attacks at very low health. There's no prompt or warning, a character will just jump up, perform his insane move, your jaw hits the floor, then you continue playing, wondering what the hell just happened.

So while you're putting ice on someone's sword or combining some weird shadow magic with rocks, just remember one thing; Final Fantasy VI created these lunatic attacks.

6: Evil enemies

The main antagonist of Final Fantasy VI is the psychotic, magic-addict clown called Kefka. Compared to the Magus and Lavos threat in Chrono Trigger, Kefka quite simply makes them look all sorts of stupid. Much like the Joker in the Batman series, this guy is evil simply because he wants to be; there's no other reason. Poisoning a stream to kill off an entire castle of people because you felt like it? He totally did. Consuming the essence of the Espers, killing them in the process for your own benefit? He's totally there. Once you play the game and see what this 'man' is capable of, you'll have no choice but to agree with me.

7: The opening scene

Watching mech-suit dudes walking toward a town has never been this enticing.

Words cannot describe the (unfortunately, I have to use this terribly trite word) epic nature of this cinematic. One must bear witness to such treasures so that the mind can understand it.

8: Choices

When you're making a difficult decision whilst playing your latest game on your new console, bear in mind that the sort of choices you're making actually came from a game like Final Fantasy VI in the beginning. With such a robust cast of characters, there are times in this game where you embark upon tactical gameplay which consists entirely of you forming up parties and fighting. Who you choose to bring with you, where you go and what you do can - and will - affect the outcome of the scenario and the game itself. If you're not careful, there are characters you'll never meet and people who you've grown close to who might just up and die. 1994 was certainly a good time for video games.

9: Battle Scenarios

Chrono Trigger has the advantage of real-time monster fighting goodness, but there's something about Final Fantasy VI's style that cannot be denied. The way the game sets itself up makes the random combat not quite as frustrating as it definitely could be. Sure, you could find it annoying at times, but the combat itself more than makes up for it. With the host of Relics, magical abilities and powerful weapons available, you can create battle scenarios that your friends might never have even tried. Yes, the monsters are static images, unlike Chrono Trigger's fully-animated monster things. But damn, those images sure do look good.

10: Ultros

One of the most unique 'villains' of all-time.

You know him, you love him, and he's totally an octopus. This guy follows you around for most of the game, causing headaches as well as humour when you least expect it. Man, I love this guy. Who does Chrono Trigger have? Maybe Robo? But I'm not dealing with that Rick Astley theme-song copying mess. Trust me on this one.

So, there you have it; ten perfectly legitimate reasons why Final Fantasy VI is the superior game. And, whilst I'm an avid defender of the greatness that is Final Fantasy VI, please don't miss out on Chrono Trigger either. The game is damn good.

Just not as good as Final Fantasy VI.

Ten reasons why Chrono Trigger is better than Final Fantasy VI

2011-11-21T19:33:00.000Z

Squaresoft, one of Square Enix’s pre-merger companies, has made some of the most celebrated games of all time.

Arguably their best work was produced in the mid- to late-90s, on the SNES and PlayStation. Of their many classics, few are in as high regard by gamers as Final Fantasy VI and Chrono Trigger for the SNES. Released a year apart from one other, in 1994 and 1995 respectively, both FFVI and Chrono Trigger have had a resounding impact on the RPG genre. Both titles are fondly remembered even today, and remain mainstays on many gaming publications’ 'Greatest Games of All Time' lists.

Of the two, though, Final Fantasy VI is often remembered as the better, placing higher on the same Greatest Games lists, and enjoying greater notoriety than Chrono Trigger’s relative level of obscurity. This cannot do. As someone who has played and loved both titles, I can say without reservation that Chrono Trigger is the crown jewel of Square’s SNES catalogue, and better than Final Fantasy VI in many respects.

You ask for a reason? Here are ten of them.

1: Combat is much more fun

Whilst the story in Final Fantasy VI is rightly adored, at the end of the day, games are meant to be played, and this is where Final Fantasy VI starts to lose some steam to Chrono Trigger. Compared to the stiff, lifeless battles in Final Fantasy VI, Chrono Trigger boasts an exciting, dynamic take on the Active Time Battle system. Characters actually seem to occupy the same physical space as enemies, and the small idle animations give each monster and ally a feeling of life, rather than an ornate, but ultimately static, picture of opponents. Also, whilst FFVI bestows each character with different abilities for use in battle - Locke can steal, Cyan can use Sword Tech, etc. - none of them are as fun to use as the Inventive Tech system, a variation on magic that allows different characters to combine their powers into an über-attack.

2: Better-looking characters and backgrounds

Perhaps it isn't fair to call out an older game for looking worse than a newer one, but Chrono Trigger’s sprite work is easily superior to Final Fantasy VI’s. Whilst series stalwart Yoshitaka Amano’s lovely art direction isn’t necessarily worse than Akira Toriyama’s work on Chrono Trigger, the world and characters in Chrono Trigger look much better-realised, with brighter colours, more environmental detail and far more expressive character sprites for each of the cast. Modern consoles will become more and more powerful as time goes by, but there will never be a day when Chrono Trigger is not a beautiful game.

3: Leaner, more-focussed experience

Final Fantasy VI is an epic, grand tale of many characters, locations and plot points, taking anywhere between 35 and 60 hours to complete, depending on your level of thoroughness. Chrono Trigger, whilst telling a story spanning across time, has fewer characters and locations, making its play time something more like 15 to 20 hours (again, dependent on thoroughness).

Why is this a plus? Chrono Trigger has much better pacing throughout, and its comparable brevity makes it easier to revisit (more on this later). Final Fantasy VI is replete with well-written characters, each of which are fleshed out (yes, even Gau...), but it’s easy for members of the cast to get lost in the sauce. Chrono Trigger - whilst not necessarily featuring characters as complex - features fewer characters painted in broader, but no less loving, strokes, resulting in a more memorable cast of digital thespians. Perhaps it’s personal preference, but I would rather have a slightly shorter, more-focussed game I could replay often (see also Super Mario RPG), than a sprawling, overly-long game that I would never want to sit through again (see also Final Fantasy VII).

4: Greater sense of imagination and place

The steampunk vibe of Final Fantasy VI is undoubtedly pretty damn cool. Steam-powered armour, subterranean castles and an Orwellian research facility for magic contribute to FFVI’s sense of aesthetic. That said, there are just as many bland, generic towns dotting the map face are there are memorable locations. Chrono Trigger’s world is smaller than FFVI’s, but it presents six variations of each location, depending on when you visit it. These range from prehistoric mud huts, to lively modern fair grounds, to post-apocalyptic domes. FFVI’s appeal lies in the subtleties of the locales, whilst Chrono Trigger’s settings are distinct from the moment the player steps foot in them.

5: Visible enemies

Let’s face it; one of the most tedious parts of JRPGs is the random encounter. No one likes being lost in a dungeon and exploring the place, only to be interrupted by a new battle every four or five steps. Like many JRPGs at the time, Final Fantasy VI suffers from this problem. Unlike many JRPGs at the time, Chrono Trigger - thank goodness - doesn’t. Every monster roams about the dungeon, allowing players to choose when they want to fight - if they want to fight at all. Granted, some areas are impossible to get through without first defeating some enemies, and foes will occasionally spring an ambush, but for the most part, there is no fighting in Chrono Trigger that is out of the will of the player.

6: Player impact on the world

Final Fantasy VI lets players follow along with its well-told and entertaining narrative, but they’re never given a chance to really impact the world with their decisions. Near the end of Chrono Trigger, players are offered a host of optional sidequests throughout different points in time. These quests, whilst not essential in order to finish the game, create visible changes within the game world, letting players alter history, and sometimes the result is not always what the player was expecting. There are also a few other moments of player choice-impact scattered throughout the main quest, but far be it for me to spoil them here.

7: 'New Game +'

Perhaps the single greatest gift to RPGs, and one of the greatest to gaming as a whole, is 'New Game +'. For the uninitiated, 'New Game +' is the option to start a new game, but retaining all previous experience, equipment, money and items collected on your first playthrough. Not only does this offer a great opportunity to absolutely destroy challenging sections of the game, but, in Chrono Trigger, it also gives way to...

8: Multiple Endings

Why bother to go through Chrono Trigger at all once it’s been beaten? The promise of new endings, of course! Chrono Trigger features thirteen different endings, which vary depending on when players decide to challenge the final boss, a challenge which can be undertaken at almost any time from the outset. Endings vary based on who is in the party and during which events the boss is fought. The endings range from good, to bad, to out-and-out strange, with the weirdest breaking the fourth wall entirely. An excellent incentive to relive the title’s finest points, multiple endings give Chrono Trigger an added sense of personality, as well as a stratospheric ceiling of replay value.

9: Many, many small presentation- and gameplay-related reasons

Again, perhaps it’s not fair to condemn a game for not having the small fixes made by its successor, but it’s these small fixes that make Chrono Trigger a much better-playing game. Characters in Chrono Trigger can move in eight directions, feeling much less stiff than the north-south-east-west mobility of Final Fantasy VI. Rather than having to equip an item to run, players can simply hold down a button to move faster. Characters that go unused in battle still level up (though they don’t gain new Tech abilities). When going from exploring to a battle, the game stays on the same screen, instead of breaking the flow and transitioning to another one. Chrono Trigger possesses numerous small fixes that ultimately add up to a better gaming experience, and one that has aged much more gracefully than its more highly-praised brethren.

10: Magus

C’mon.

That isn't to say that Final Fantasy is somehow a bad or inferior game. Far from it. Final Fantasy VI’s grand, epic story and deeply memorable score are just two of many reasons to love it unreservedly. That said, I hold Chrono Trigger closer to my heart, and it will always be my favourite over Final Fantasy VI. Fortunately, both are available on the Wii’s Virtual Console for a measly 800 Wii Points (around $8, or £5.60), giving gamers a better opportunity than ever to experience two of the greatest games of all time. Want to really decide which is better? Snap them both up, and decide for yourself.

Do you think Chrono Trigger is the better of the two, or does your heart lie with Final Fantasy VI? Let us know in the comments, or Tweet us your opinions via the Gamer's Guide to Life.com Twitter account.

Why I'm not all that excited for Grand Theft Auto V

2011-11-18T17:14:00.001Z

On the morning of November 2, Rockstar gobsmacked the gaming community with the announcement trailer for Grant Theft Auto V, a quick, teasing look at the publisher’s newest tale of guns, cars and criminal activity in the big city.

Twitter and the gaming press were absolutely alight with speculation about the title’s story, how the actual game will play out and what other possible elements might have been hinted in the minute or so of footage released. This sort of behaviour is far from unexpected; Grand Theft Auto is one of the industry’s most popular franchises, and it only makes sense that the announcement would be greeted with such enthusiasm from the gaming community.

So why don't I feel that excited about it?

I suppose I shouldn't be so surprised; the Grand Theft Auto titles aren’t my gaming sweet spot, and never really have been. Granted, I've had my fair share of mayhem-causing sessions in GTA III and Vice City back in the day, and I can definitely appreciate the expert craftsmanship the Rockstar applies to all of its titles, as well as why so many people love the franchise so dearly. That said, the GTA series just doesn't click with me in the way that it does with over 22 million gamers worldwide, and I'll do my best to try to explain why.

For one, Grand Theft Auto titles have always been too big for my taste. By this, I don't mean that the play areas are too big - one of my favourite parts of The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker was sailing around and exploring the humongous map - but, rather, that there's simply too much of it. The sheer amount of time and willpower I need to commit in order to experience more than a small portion of what a Grand Theft Auto game offers is staggering, and something that I can't quite get around. Certainly too much of a good thing can only be a good thing, but GTA for me has always been too much of a... thing.

This is because I never know whether it's good or not. Any given GTA experience (and I've played III, Vice City, San Andreas, and IV) always leaves me feeling like I've been spinning my wheels, peddling along until maybe, maybe, I'll get to the 'good part' of the game. A similar complaint can be lodged against JRPGs or the Zelda series, two of my very favourite things in gaming. What makes GTA different, though, and worthy of my ire, is how empty the experience feels between bouts of plot; I always feel like I'm performing disposable tasks in order to get through the game, none of which, taken by themselves, are very fun. Again, you can lodge complaints against nearly any JRPG, but while JRPGs are at least understood to be more deliberately-paced, measured affairs, GTA is ostensibly about action and explosive moments, which makes the mostly-passive missions feel even more like a dishonest sleight of hand.

Perhaps this is the difference between a guided experience (Zelda) and an open one (GTA, Elder Scrolls, etc.), and their place in my gaming lexicon. The Zelda series dictates what sort of gameplay experience I have: what choices my character makes, what dungeons I play through in which order, and what items I need to use in order to progress. This simplification of choice allows me to get caught up in the journey, and to invest myself in the story being told to me. In Elder Scrolls, I'm in charge of charting my own course and telling my own story. While many gamers may feel liberated by the breadth of choice they are given to decide their own fate, I get stressed out by the number of decisions I need to make in order to drive the experience, and fail to get caught up in anything.

Furthermore, I’ve never really been satisfied by GTA’s brand of story-telling, either. I've always felt that GTA's story and pacing have suffered, in favour of its open-endedness. Videogame storytelling at its best is often comparable to a novel, with character traits coming naturally over the course of the narrative; titles like Chrono Trigger and Uncharted have a coherent, measured plot full of well-realised characters. Storytelling in the GTA games, by contrast, always feels comparable to a comic strip, with characters broadly and instantly defined from the moment we first meet them, and handled in bite-sized chunks; only over the course of the games do their subtleties peek their heads out, and only if the player is willing to meet the game halfway and watch for the subtle shades. Because the stories are so stop-start, and the story-telling so shallow, the narratives often feel like they lack urgency and pacing, making them less than compelling, and creating a profound disconnect from plot.

For their newest entry, I hope Rockstar looks to the Assassin's Creed series, and to Batman: Arkham City - two titles I enjoy immensely despite my general aversion to open-world games - for inspiration on how to handle Los Santos in the upcoming game. Assassin’s Creed uses an open world similar to the GTA games, where missions are doled out from side characters found on the main map. However, while GTA missions can often feel tangential to advancing any sort of plot (watch a cutscene, drive somewhere, kill someone, drive back), Assassin’s Creed II and Brotherhood work much harder to give each gameplay segment a context within the narrative, even if the objective is as simple as 'follow this dude over there'. Arkham City, on the other hand, gives players entirely different areas for the game’s main missions, in addition to an enormous, dense world for gamers to explore, segmenting off the main play areas to help present more and different gameplay opportunities than if Batman were forced to chase down The Joker on the actual streets of Arkham City.

I get why people love the Grand Theft Auto games. Rockstar is perhaps the best in the business at crafting living, breathing worlds for players to lose themselves in; a friend of mine says he put literally hundreds of hours into faffing about in GTA IV, simply because he enjoyed the world so much. The game is going to be a smash, and I’m glad that so many gamers find enjoyment in GTA, with all of the freedom, chaos and goofiness that the series entails. I just hope that Rockstar can give the series more focus, for those of us who want more than simply the opportunity to wander around.

Replay: Five X-Men games to remember

2011-11-17T16:55:00.002Z

It's an exciting time to be a fan of Marvel's Merry Mutants, the X-Men.

In the pages of the X-Men comics, a major overhaul is in the works for the team as the Schism event, a story arc centred on a team-dividing clash between Wolverine and Cyclops, comes to an end. This summer, X-Men First Class helped 20th Century Fox prove that there was still hope for the X-Men film franchise. And, just recently, gamers around the globe were able to get their hands on X-Men: Destiny, the latest game to feature Marvel’s super-powered outcasts.

Developed by Silicon Knights, X-Men: Destiny is an action-RPG that allows you to step into the shoes of one of three original mutant characters. Although the game doesn’t allow you to create your own characters, there is a heavy emphasis on power customisation, so your mutant of choice will have the abilities which suit you best. Likewise, you are free to determine your allegiance, as the game allows you to choose to side with the stubbornly heroic X-Men, or the Brotherhood of Mutants (a.k.a., the bad guys). Now, although my status as an X-Men fanboy is undisputed, the sad truth is that if I had to sum up Destiny in one word, it would be disappointing. Lackluster graphics, repetitive combat and uninspired characters rob the game of all of its potential.

But I promise you gamers, Marvel's Merry Mutants have seen better days. Don't believe me, yeah well i came prepared. I leave you with the definitive list of the very best X-Men games of the past; basically just the games I liked the very most.

X-Men Arcade

If part of your childhood was spent frolicking in the savageness of the early 90s, chances are that you, like me, spent a considerable amount of time at the arcade. Everyone has that single arcade game that they remember the most, the one that swallowed the most coins and incited the simultaneous feelings of excitement, rage and love. For me, that game was the X-Men Arcade. It’s both the first arcade game I can remember playing, and the one I played the most.

A classic 90s beat-em-up, X-Men Arcade was basically a side-scroller where you hit everything that stood in your way. Refined gameplay it wasn't, but man, was it fun. The game featured six beloved X-Men in playable roles – Wolverine, Cyclops, Dazzler, Colossus, Nightcrawler and Storm are all present – and they all look great (all things considered), with big and detailed character sprites. I’m a huge fan of Storm, and some of my fondest gaming memories involve kicking Sentinels to the curb with everyone’s favourite weather witch. Though, in all honesty, I never did understand why Storm was packing a wand.

Spider-Man and the X-Men: Arcade’s Revenge

A SNES game featuring both the X-Men and Spider-Man was almost too much for my ten-year-old mind to compute. The sheer incredible awesomeness of the concept was too much to bear. That’s probably why I never finished the game. Or maybe it was because the game was so freaking hard, even by old-school standards.

This nineties gem had Spider-Man rushing in to save Storm, Gambit, Wolverine and Cyclops from the menace of Arcade. You don’t need to know much about the guy, just that he’s constructed a fun little theme park called Murderworld; Disney World it is not. As with many SNES platformers of the day, the controls were a challenge unto themselves, the platforming was torture, and deaths came cheaply, but these hang-ups made getting through a level all the more rewarding. It was no masterpiece, but Cyclops shot his optic blasts and Gambit threw his cards, and at the time, that was enough.

X-Men (Sega Genesis)

When I finally managed to convince my parents to get me a Sega Genesis, this is the first game I bought. A 2D platformer at heart, the game allowed you to take control of Cyclops, Gambit, Nightcrawler and Wolverine. Several other X-Men were featured as assist characters too, including Rogue, Iceman, Storm and Archangel. As a kid, watching Jean Grey swoop in and save me from falling to my death with her telekinetic powers was probably the most amazing thing I’d ever seen – I didn’t get out much, but still. The graphics were all kinds of pretty, with detailed, colourful sprites, and the gameplay was as challenging as you would expect from a mid-90’s 16-bit platformer.

But what is the one thing that really sets this game apart? The one thing that every person who ever played it was unable to forget? The game was set in the X-Men’s Danger Room — if you don’t know what that is, honestly I don’t know how you’re still reading this — and the premise was that the X-Men’s training system had been infected by a virus. Upon defeating one of the bosses, the game would tell you to 'reset the computer' in order to clear the virus. Look all you want at the screen, you’ll find no reset button, or command prompt; you had to literally press the reset button on your console. Hold down on the button too long, however, and the system would reset like normal.

You can imagine my frustration the hundreds of time I held the button for just a moment too long. My controller, on the other hand, felt my frustration, as I threw it across the room. Again, and again, and again.

X-Men: Children of the Atom

Before Marvel vs. Capcom, there was X-Men vs. Street Fighter, and before that there was X-Men: Children of the Atom. It was a bright day in Valhalla when Marvel and Capcom put their heads and talents together to create a fighting game, and gamers have been thanking their lucky stars ever since. Children of the Atom was the first fighting game to feature the X-Men, created by the great minds behind Street Fighter; with a pedigree like that, it’s no wonder the game is still impressive today. In fact, if you look closely enough, you’ll notice that Wolverine and Storm use pretty much the same special moves today, almost twenty years later, in Marvel vs. Capcom 3. Now that’s what I call staying power.

A few years later, Capcom would lose the rights to Marvel’s characters. Activision stepped in, and created three X-Men-centric fighting games (Mutant Academy and its sequel, and X-Men: Next Dimension), and although I played the hell out of those games, they didn't hold a candle to Capcom’s original masterpiece. I’m glad that the mutants are back in the hands of Capcom, and here’s hoping against hope that a Children of the Atom sequel might still see the light of day.

X-Men: Legends and X-Men: Legends 2

The X-Men are, first and foremost, a team, and although many games had let you control many different X-Men one-at-a-time, no game had ever put you in control of a team. Activision and Raven Software set out to solve that problem with X-Men: Legends, released for the PlayStation 2, GameCube, and Xbox. Featuring fifteeen playable characters, each with their own diverse power set, the game allowed you to create teams of up to four X-Men, and wreak havoc on multitudes of baddies. An action RPG, Legends almost felt like Diablo for X-Men fans.

How cool was it to hold a baddie in place using Jean Grey’s Telekinesis, and then blast him away with Cyclops optic blast?

About as freaking awesome as it sounds.

The cel-shaded character models of the game weren’t appreciated by every gamer out there, but regardless of whichever gripes you had over the graphics, the Legends games offered a definitive X-Men experience, with great storylines, a massive list of playable characters, and gameplay that was faithful to the comics. A greater X-Men game has yet to be created if you ask me.

Did I miss your favourite X-game? Don’t be shy, troll me below.