Babies have rubber gums.  Breastfeeding moms are very glad babies don’t have teeth.  And when they start getting those teeth it can be a painful experience for Mom.

I am hoping that I will get to the point soon but I am having such a good time talking about toothlessness it seems a shame to move on.  Anyway, teeth are very important to our diet and chewing is even more important.  I won’t go into the gory details about mastication but teeth chew up food and provide bursting-flavor-sensations in our mouths. This is the first step in the digestive process.  In our hurried society we almost skip this step. 

As a dietitian I am often faced with a patient suffering from low blood sugar.  My job is to give the patient a quick surge of sugar to stop the decline.  The standard care process is to give the patient 15 grams of carbohydrate and then retest the blood sugar after 10-15 minutes.  (See, its lots more fun talking about teeth;  big teeth, little teeth, red teeth, blue teeth, teeth teeth teeth…sorry.) 

So anyway, what does all of this jabber mean? 

IT TAKES AT LEAST 10-15 MINUTES FOR YOUR BRAIN TO REGISTER YOU HAVE BEGUN EATING and for the food to just start trickling into your blood stream! (And some people’s brains work slower than others- please see Blog on our favorite politicians.) 

So, let’s look at this typical scenario.  You work a long day.  You are hungry.  You stop at your favorite Mexican restaurant.  They bring a basket of chips.  You look at the menu while munching on chips.  In 10 short minutes you have just consumed 1000 calories of fried chips and your brain doesn’t even know you started eating yet. You have just sabotaged your healthy diet in ten minutes.

Now back to the teeth thing.

Your Mom not only told you to chew with you mouth closed she also told you not to gulp your food.  There is an old Weight Watcher’s trick: chew each bite of food 20 times before swallowing.  It gives your brain a chance to catch up (unless you are a politician, then it might take an extra hour or so) and your satiety hormones will have time to kick in and tell you that you are getting full. 

So, for heaven’s sake CHEW your food WITH your mouth closed, please.  You will feel full and you will eat less and your weight will be more controlled.    

And if you need an extra pair of teeth I think I have my Grandpa’s in a box somewhere……

Luv, WD 

Blog by Glenna Moe, Kansas City Dietitian

Having grown tired of “news programs” (I use that term loosely-is it really news that Kim K. has a new boyfriend?) and their spin on politics, I have decided there is a much better method for selecting the best candidate for President, Governor, Dog Catcher or whatever.  Let’s elect the candidate based on his/her vegetable consumption.  Each candidate completes a 3 Day food record.  The candidate with the greatest intake of colorful veggies wins.  Simple.  Fair.  We could be done with robo calls, annoying news programs on whether women are actually working if they are home with a two year old.  Any woman (or man) who has spent 5 days in a row home alone with a two year old can answer that question without the news media telling her/him that it was/was not “Work.” 

Anyway, the real question is:  does the candidate eat his veggies?

Why is this so crucial you may be asking?  A person who regularly eats a wide variety of veggies is smarter than one who does not.  Oh my, you say, that is a bold statement.  However, I make this statement with total confidence.

Logical Argument:

1. Veggies are jam packed full of disease fighting anti-artery clogging anti-oxidants, ant-cancer vitamins and minerals, and in general pro-health substances. 
2. People are full of “free radicals.”  (Immediately a picture of the hippies from the 70’s comes to mind).  Free radicals are those things that make us old and sick. 
3. Veggies repair free radicals. 
4. People who eat veggies have better blood flow to their brains. 
5. Better blood flow to brains helps people  think better.
6. Politicians do not eat veggies. 
7. Mystery solved, now we know why the politicians can’t get a thing done. 

And that is why we should pick our elected officials based on their daily vegetable consumption. 

The End. 

P.S. Vote for me for Judge.  I’d make a great judge.  ”Tell me sir, what did you eat for breakfast?  A sausage biscuit, you say?  Guilty as charged.  Next…”

OK on with the dirty subject matter at hand.

I am often asked by clients if it is best to eat “organic”.  This is a question fraught with complexities. I could address those complexities but instead I will try to figure out other ways to use the word fraught.

The following fruits and veggies are considered to be fraught with pesticides.  Always choose organic.  Look for the official Organic Seal.  Don’t waste your money on “organic” foods that do not have this seal. (If you want to waste your money, send it to me.  I am fraught with ideas.)

Peaches

Apples

Bell Peppers

Celery

Nectarines

Strawberries

Cherries

Lettuce

Grapes

Pears

Spinach

Potatoes

 Other F & V’s (short for Sexy Fruits and Veggies) have been identified as being safe. 

No matter the F & V’s you buy, always wash well. They are all fraught with nasty little dirts.  (Yes, I used this word intentionally.)  Just pour a little (about 2 Tablespoons) white vinegar into a big bowl, fill with cold water, let sit for about a minute, pour into strainer and rinse for about a minute.

And that is the Double Down Dirty Dish on the Dirtiest F and V’s. 

Do yourself a favor and clean up your act (and your produce.) 

Thank you once again for supporting WD!

A book report by Kansas City Dietitian, Glenna Moe

Do you grab a breakfast bar in the morning?  How do you know if you are grabbing a cookie or a healthy breakfast replacement?  I hate to break (fast, get it, Break-fast, I know, I’m losing it.)  this to you but 95% of the “Nutritious Breakfast Bars” are actually cookies.  Go ahead.  Check it out.  Look at the back of your Nutri-bar and compare it to a chocolate cookie.  I bet the cookie will be lower in calories but other than that the nutrition will be about equal.  Please say it ain’t so! 

To find a decent bar follow these guidelines: 

1. Read the ingredient list on the back of the package.  If the first ingredient is wheat flour, you are in trouble.  Look for ingredients like rolled oats, chopped dates, dried blueberries, etc. 
2. Look at the nutrition label to discover the grams of fiber and protein.   A good bar will have at least 5 grams of each. 
3. Sodium- less is always better.  It should be less than 200 milligrams.
4. And of course calories DO count. 

If you are looking for some alternatives:

• Buy large bags of dried fruit and unsalted nuts from Costco or Sam’s.  Mix together and put in baggies to grab as you head out of the door. 
• Grab a stick of string cheese and an apple.
• Grab a slice of 100% whole wheat bread, spread lightly with natural peanut butter or almond butter. (Caution- don’t lick the knife- too many extra calories.)
• Grab a handful of raw almonds and a banana. 

Any of these are better than most breakfast bars.  So, if you are going to eat a “breakfast bar” you might as well grab a cookie.  They taste better anyway. 

Bet you never thought I would tell you to eat a cookie, did you?

Beware, when you start the day with a Cookie, it is downhill from there…. just like the book.

If You Give a Mouse a Cookie…. www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFKzriYtEt8

WD

Did you know- that a gentleman suffered a heart attack at The Heart Attack Grill in Vegas last week?

Did you know- this is National Heart Health Month? Just making sure you are keeping up on all of the breaking news.

Did you know- one of the most annoying quotes that people spout off to me is:”Moderation in all things.” 

Did you know- this quote was penned by Aristotle in the context of discussing virtues?

Did you know- this quote has nothing to do with a bacon festival, a 6,000 calorie hamburger or giving yourself an excuse to do whatever you want to do? 

Did you know- this quote does have to do with “temperance”- self control and restraint?

I’m just checking about all of this.  I am starting to think that perhaps

You don’t know…  

WD

A slightly not humorous Blog written by a slightly annoyed Dietitian in Kansas City

I pride myself in my cutting-edgedness.  (And also in my creative use of the English language- Check out becoming nutri-fied.) 

Imagine my excitement when I saw the headlines about Lin Madness.  The national news media had finally found my Blog. 

Yes, my friends, I was the first to introduce the magic in Lin-o-len-ic acid.  This is a wonderful fat that is found in flaxseed and walnuts.  You will find similar fatty acids in sardines, salmon, tuna and mackerel.  These fatty acids are in a general group of fats called Omega-3 fatty acids or more popularly known as “fish oil”. Everyone, and their dog, should have a diet rich in these fats. 

In addition you may want to take fish oil capsules.  (I have heard that Jeremy Lin is crediting his success to his daily intake of fish oil. (Naw..)

Figuring out which ones to take can be a daunting task. Follow these guidelines for best results.

Look on the back of the bottle to find the:

1. Serving size- It may be more than one capsule.
2. Amount of cholesterol- There may be a large amount. 
3. DHA and EPA and the milligrams listed with them.  Add these 2 numbers together.  They should equal approximately 500 mgs.  This is the recommended daily amount for most healthy adults. 
4. Look for the USP symbol.  This means the supplement meets purity standards. 

 Check with your doctor if you have concerns or questions about your fish oil capsules.

The Cinderella story of Jeremy Lin will fade in time but the health benefits of Lin-o-len-ic acid will go on. 

My suggestion to you, if you want to follow your dream like Jeremy has, then follow my Simple Diet so you can be strong and healthy and wealthy and wise. 

(Wow, all of this is one Simple Diet?  YEP!)  

Wishing you a Lin-ified Day! 

WD

www.glennamoe.com

Let me beat them to the punch!  (So there,”Choose My Plate”, I am more cutting-edgier than you!) 

When you see the words “whole grains” on breads, crackers, Count Chocula, Twinkies, etc. it’s a lie, a great big fat lie.  I know you are gravely disappointed to find out that advertisers sometimes stretch the truth. 

Here are the facts: 

Read the ingredient label.  If you see the word “enriched” it means it is not whole grain.  However, if it says, 100% whole grain or 100% whole wheat then it is true.  If it just says “whole grain” it can be made with large amounts of “NAKED CARBS!”  Please read my seriously breaking news Blog on Naked Carbs.  It is life changing. Click here.

And once again I ask each and every one of you to join my for-profit organization:  PETG!  (You can join the People for the Ethical Treatment of Grains by sending your $100 annual membership fee to me.  I promise to use the money wisely to protect our poor Grains.) 

I don’t know about you but I can’t handle much more of this breaking news!

Oh, and if you saw the “naked” commercial during the super bowl send me an email and tell me who was naked.  You might win a prize.  And for sure watch for my next Blog.  I will reveal the naked truth about the naked one.  (And you might even get some good ideas for Valentine’s Day). 

And while you are emailing, you could also  email the national news and let them know that I outed their story early. 

WD

Prior to teeing off each contestant would enjoy a high protein high anti-oxidant smoothie.  (Make mine raspberry, please.)  And of course a weigh in and a waist circumference measurement. 

The first hole:

Everyone tee’s off.  Then, everyone lines up at the tee.  Men at the men’s tee.  Women at the Women’s tee, of course. 

Out in front is the “Tee Leader”, Perky Pauline. (I thought this was what they meant when talking about the “Leader Boards.”) She leads the group in Pilates core strengthening exercises for 5 minutes.  Then, she blows her tournament whistle and everyone dashes, while carrying their own clubs, as fast as they can to the furthest ball.  Everyone takes turns hitting their shot.  Then, Perky Pauline is back leading them in more exercises.  Once again a race to the green.  On the green everyone has to hit their shot from an assigned yoga position.  I think balancing half moon would be a great one. 

And so on. 

Until the 9^th hole.  Refreshments are brought in.  Brat-flavored hummus with chips made from flaxseed hot dog buns. 

The back 9 goes at an even faster pace with increasingly tougher exercises and sprints.   

Finally it is time for the 19^th Hole.   All of these healthy contestants race once again into the club house.  Another weigh in and waist circumference measurement. 

Then a delicious meal is served of fresh pear margaritas, grilled scallops and shrimp on a spinach salad topped with sliced strawberries and feta cheese. YUM!

Imagine my surprise when my husband burst my bubble and told me it was the “Waste” Management Golf Tournament.  I don’t even want to think about what they did between holes.  (I think it had to do with port-a-potties.)

So, anyway, if any of you wealthy readers out there would like to work with me to create the first Waist Management Golf Tourney, just let me know. I’m looking for sponsors.   

WD

A humorous nutrition Blog written by Glenna Moe, Kansas City Dietitian

Did you know, “Sugar is bad for you?”  Can you believe it?  They said it leads to weight gain, diabetes, elevated triglycerides and heart disease.  Could this possibly be true?  I am just so surprised!

But, there is more to the story.  Apparently, there is sugar in juice, pops, coffee drinks and even ketchup.  Like salt, it is everywhere.  And it seems that much of our sugar intake is at breakfast.  Toast, muffins, juice,   sweetened cereals, coffees, etc.  Who knew?

And to top this off, these foods containing sugar often also contain white flour.  AND, white flour also raises blood sugars and triglycerides!  (I can’t take all of this breaking news!) 

Perhaps you should start your day with protein.  Almonds, walnuts, Greek style yogurt, veggie omelets, protein smoothies with berries….

I wonder what the next shocking story will be.  I hope they don’t decide that fried chicken and gravy is bad for you.  That would be a real bummer! 

I am reminded of a very wise comment made by a two year old.  He is the son of a cardiologist friend.  When offered a sugar cookie he adamantly refused because “Sugar makes your teeth fall out.”  Who knew that he is better informed than 90% of my clients. 

Love with Sugar on it,

WD

A humorous nutrition Blog written by Glenna Moe, Kansas City Dietitian