Go To The Ant

The Good Life

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Tue, 20 Jul 2010 10:12:00 +0000

I think I've been looking at this whole financial independence thing all wrong. Maybe the final click into place was reading "The Ultimate Cheapskate" by Jeff Yeager.

It struck me, it really struck me that these cheapskates or tightwads are not sacrificing. In their minds, they have truly discovered the good life that just happens to cost next to nothing.

So, while I'll still call around for the best car maintenance costs and look closer at my finances so I won't get stuck again paying too much for car and home insurance, I also think that I'm going to concentrate on living the good life – my version of the good life.

Jeff Yeager likes to travel. So, he travels on the cheap by staying in hostels. Amy Dacyzyn is a quilter. Instead of doing what I did which was going to a quilt shop and buying everything retail, she discovered a way to enjoy her hobby inexpensively.

They took the lack of money as a challenge and found a way around it. I guess that's what Jeff Yeager means by eliminating the money step.

It gets me thinking. Can I get what I want without spending money? Is my life constricted by the lack of money or lack of creativity? Hmmm.

Who Do You Want To Be?

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Sat, 17 Jul 2010 10:34:00 +0000

Whenever there is a tough question in my life that could involve a great deal of pain, I ask myself "Who do you want to be?" Not, who is the person you're currently looking in the mirror, but what kind of person do you want to be? And then, what kind of decision would that person make? How would they act?

It's amazing how that cuts through all the nonsense.

The Dryer Experiment

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 00:40:00 +0000

For the past month I have not used my dryer. First, this was because while trying to clean out the vent I could not connect the hose back. But after my dad came along and fixed it, I left the dryer unplugged just to see how much money I could save.

Turns out the answer was none.

Compared to last year, my electricity use actually went up. Now this could be attributed to the crazy hot weather we've been having down here lately. Still, I have not plugged in my dryer and I probably won't. Why? It's just not about the dryer.

1.It's my penny
So what if unplugging the dryer saves only a couple of pennies? They're my pennies and I would like to have them. One thing that Donald Trump said that I've always remember is “Watch Your Pennies, They become dollars.” And I found that when I get in a habit of watching my pennies, I do save dollars. Or, as I tell myself, it's a small thing so it must be very important.

2.Flexibility of Moving Where a Dryer is Not Available
I'm not gonna stay in my house forever. It's just way too big for one person and the suburbs really are not a good place for a single lady. The entire overhead of an underused house is ridiculous and probably enough for another post. I've found that when it comes to apartments, the more amenities, the higher the price. If you can live without a washer/dryer unit in your apartment, a dishwasher, a gym and nice landscaping, you can score a deal. I'm pretty used to life without a dryer now.

3.It's Too Darn Hot
Do you find it strange that when it's hot, we run air conditioning to cool down, but yet stick our clothes in a dryer? Seems like we could use that heat to our advantage. And before you ask, I'm just trying clothes on racks in my house. I don't have a clothesline. I doubt my Homeowners Association would be glad to see them.

All in all, I've gotten used to the hard towels. I don't enjoy them, but because I grew up with them, it's not like a jolt. Now it is time to stop using the dishwasher.

Trash Day

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 00:40:00 +0000

As the last day of my staycation, I went out walking around the neighborhood at around 8am this morning. Today is trash day and I was surprised at the amount of good stuff I saw sitting out on the curb.

I had heard folks talking about what people threw away, but I never realized. I mean, there were baby toys and rubbermaid containers. Things that could have easily been donated to the Goodwill up the street, but would now go into a landfill.

I never thought of myself as an environmental person. I'm more interested in saving money than saving the planet. It just bothered me, though.

My Total Money Makeover Review

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 11:32:00 +0000

This is a review of the subscription site My Total Money Makeover. When I was trying to decide whether or not to take a chance and try it out, I did not see any reviews. Since I've finished my one month experiment, I thought it might be a good idea to write it up. Disclaimer - I am not receiving any payment for this review. I won't receive any benefit whatsoever if you sign up for the site.

What It Is
A subscription based site run by Dave Ramsey, the same guy who runs the excellent Financial Peace University. I've been through Financial Peace University three times and it was extremely helpful in helping me get my financial life together.

The Cost
At the time I'm writing this, the cost is $10 a month. As an internet junkie, I can say that for a moderated, subscription-based site, at the time of this post - July 3, 2010 - $10 is a reasonable price.

What It Has
You get online budgeting forms, ways to track your goals in your life and little extras like how to set up a legacy drawer. The most important thing in the site is the forums.

What I Liked
The forums are really good for a certain demographic. If you are in debt and out of control, joining this site is something you may want to consider. The site's members are knowledgeable and helpful. Sometimes, they'll run challenges like a $25 a week grocery challenge. Also, because this is a subscription-based site, the trolls are kept to a minimum. I certainly did not see any while I was a member which is very, very important.

The step-by-step process on setting up your legacy drawer that has all your important papers like your will and bank account information was also a hit for me.

Who Will Mostly Benefit
Young couples just starting out and families who are in debt. This site will especially be helpful if you have no support in your real life. If your friends and family are starting to make fun of you, this site could be well worth the $10 a month just so you can know that you are not crazy. While the site has a range of members, I mostly found the average to be married with kids, in other words, like most of the country.

So, What About Singles?
There's a singles forum, but it does not have a lot of activity going on and from what I saw it is mostly social. This site is really geared toward families. To be fair, if you post a question, you will definitely get a response. If you are single and you are just starting on your financial journey, this site may be for you. If you are already out of debt, on a budget and dream of living in a Tumbleweed House, I'd pass.

How Do I Know If It's For Me?
Easy. Take it on a test drive. The site offers a 7-day free trial. You do have to have a debit card on file and if you do not cancel within the 7 days time, your debit card will be charged. This is all stated up front though with no surprises.

During your 7-day trial, ask questions on the forums (don't be shy) and check out the excellent Frugal Living forum. If you can find $10 worth of money-saving ideas for your situation, keep the subscription. If you can't, cancel. Simple as that.

How Easy Is It To Cancel?
For me, this is the true test of any subscription. How easily can I get out of it? Dead easy. I canceled with like two clicks. Got a confirmation email and my debit card has not been charged since. Because of this good experience, I'd be likely to try the site again.

Wrap-Up
If you are in need of a community of folks while getting out of debt, this could be your place. It's at least worth looking at. The web site is My Total Money Makeover.

How to Find Cheap Work Clothes for Women

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 02:08:00 +0000

When you hear folks talk about finding clothes on the cheap, you'll hear garage sales and thrift shops mentioned a lot. But those did not work for me. I am an overweight, short woman. I know what styles look best on me and those are not usually found at garage sales or thrift stores or even stores like Ross Dress for Less or Marshall's. Yet, my cheap co-workers score very nice clothes using these tactics. So, what gives?

What no one ever tells you is that you are going to have to find your own place. My clothes place is a mall store near my house. As I type this, I'm wearing a shirt that cost $1.99 new. I rarely find my size in thrift stores let alone at $1.99 ( the thrift stores here are kinda pricey unless you go on a half price day and then things are picked over).

So, in your first foray into finding nice, cheap clothes you are going to have to do a lot of shopping. And you just can't discount a location of a store because one location did not like what you have. I can never find clothes at the store where my mom works out but I've had great luck with the same store, but the location near my house.

Here are some tips to keep you honest though.

1. Have a price limit
Mine is $20. If I can find a machine-washable, work dress that does not require any alterations, and goes with the shoes and handbag I currently carry, I will probably buy it. Now that I have five work dresses, though, I am less and less tempted. I'm more likely to buy stockings (one of the biggest rip offs known to man) with my clothing budget.

2. Try the cheap store in the nice neighborhood
All stores do not carry the same merchandise. If you don't like the Target in your neighborhood, have you tried the one in the high-rent district? They may carry a better selection than what you're used to and the clearance items won't be as picked over.

3. Know What Looks Good on You
This will save you a whole lot of time and frustration. Why try on clothes if you know that it is not going to suit your figure? Sometimes you are pleasantly surprised, but make sure that you know it is not a style that is going to make you look like a giant tomato (OK, I was projecting there).

4. Dress Like You are On a Mission
Because you are. You know the drill - comfortable shirt, a skirt if you can get away with it and slip on shoes. If you're really good, you'll bring your work shoes and knee-highs to see how everything will look together. I must admit that I am never that good, though. Oh yeah and pack some snacks while you're out and about so you won't go to a fast food place.

5. Get a Second Opinion
I almost missed out on two work dresses because I did not like them. I don't go shopping with my sisters or my mom, so I'm stuck making these clothes decisions by myself. Not a good idea for the clothing challenged. This is where my cell phone comes in. I take a picture of myself when I try the dress on and send it to my mom for an opinion. I have a purple dress that I almost did not buy, but mom liked it so I bought it. I get compliments on it all the time. The dress was $20. This is the third summer I'll be wearing it.

6. Look for Accessories or Other Items
Be focused, but if you strike out in the clothes department, perhaps you can use the store for something else. I hate thrift shops for clothes, but love them for books, especially because folks are notorious collectors. If you can find one book on a certain subject, you can bet that they'll be other books waiting for the picking. You may also look at the store for a place for accessories. You never know.

7. Know When To Quit
While thrift stores and garage sales may be gold mines for those with small children, if they are not working for you, then stop going. Or at least stop going for clothes. Every time a co-workers walks in with a great find from Ross, I am tempted to go back there even though I know that it is not my shop. That is their shop. I'll give a place three times. That's fair. And then it is good-bye.

So, at first you are going to have a lot of misses. Don't worry, though. If you keep trying new places, you're going to find your place that carries the type of clothes that you like. After that, you just have to be patient and wait and you'll be able to build up a nice work wardrobe on the cheap.

Lilies from The Yard

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 13:47:00 +0000

I planted these Wal-mart bulbs years ago and nothing happened. They decided to make an appearance this year and they are absolutely gorgeous! My house smells like lilies.

I'm also trying out a new homemade flower food that I found through. Suzanne McMinn's blog Chickens in the Road. The link is Homemade Flower Food and it is incredibly easy. I had everything I needed already at the house.

Niece's Birthday Swag

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 13:10:00 +0000

My niece turned 16 yesterday. The above picture shows her gifts.

She selected what she wanted from a bunch of pictures representing the choices I uploaded to my flickr account. The choices also included an afternoon of quilting and homemade cookies.

I made the pillowcase from fabric in my stash. The book had been sitting on my bookcase for over a year unread. I take excellent care of my books so I don't feel any guilt in passing it on especially because my niece knew that it was used. The adorable bag is from my Valentine's Day gift from my parents and I got the card at a great price.

All in all, I think this gift was a win.

Now time to prep for the August birthdays - Dad, College-bound nephew and youngest niece.

Insurance Update

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 00:39:00 +0000

Well, come July 1st I will officially have new homeowner's and auto insurance. I've sent in my auto insurance check and canceled my old insurance to be effective on the 1st.

My new agent has warned me that the insurance company may be by the house to take pictures. I let my dad know just in case my neighbors call him if they see any strange people lurking around the house.

Yes. My neighbors would call my parents. They know what my parents' cars look like and that during the day it is easier to find them than it is to find me. My neighbors send my parents Christmas cards. I don't get a Christmas card. They do.

My street is full of retirees and stay-at-home moms - folks who know who belongs and who doesn't and are home long enough to keep an eye on the street. It's a nice bit of security.

Why It's Not Really Free

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 10:11:00 +0000

One thing great about Atlanta in the summer are all the seemingly free events. Yes, I stuck that qualification word "seemingly" in that sentence because not all free events are free.

If they take place after work, I have to think about what I'm going to have for dinner because I don't live in town. So, it's not as if I can go home, grab dinner and then make the event. I'll either have to pack dinner in addition to lunch or pay for dinner.

Then, I'm always analyzing the parking situation. Is an event free if you have to pay $10 to park? My co-workers find this funny. But I don't take chances with my car or with my safety. I like to park where my car won't get towed and where after the event if finished there will be plenty of folks walking the same direction that I am.

Lastly, there's the stress of making it out of the venue once you're done. Most of the time I don't have a problem. But when several events are letting out at the same time (a huge concert at Piedmont Park and a show at the Alliance come to mind), it is straight up horrible.

For these reasons, I rarely take advantage of what Atlanta has to offer. Sometimes, when adding up these peripheral costs, it's cheaper to take in the community theater in my own county than head to Atlanta for a good time.

Break Even Analysis - Land Line

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 10:11:00 +0000

Yesterday, I gave the insurance agent guy the wrong home number. I use my regular home phone so little that I forgot it. Hmm. Maybe it's time to go cell phone only. The only reason why I really have the land line is for my security system.

So, I call up my security system company. Turns out that you don't need a land line. The cost is an additional $10 a month and $159 to install the alternative system. I figured it would take me 5 months to break even.

Here are the calculations:

Current Cost of Home Phone = $42.80/month
Add'l Cost for Security -$10.00/month

That brings us to a savings of $32.80/month

But the installation of the new system will cost $159

$159/$32.80 savings/month = Approximately 5 months.

I have some vacation time coming up. I'm going to go for it. I can always get a land line if I miss it.

Father's Day Loot

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Sun, 20 Jun 2010 22:45:00 +0000

Quick update on Father's Day.

My dad is pretty easy when it comes to gifts. He wanted a white rose so I got him an old favorite - iceberg. I purchased the plant from a nursery up the street from the house with cash.

Dad also loves coconut cake with lemon filling. He only gets it once a year because it takes so long to make. I made the cake, the lemon filling and the fluffy frosting from scratch.

There was, of course, fried chicken and other foodstuffs. I was able to take a "plate" home for lunch over the next couple of days.

All in all, it was a successful day. Dad liked his presents and appreciated the coupons I slipped in his card. I let my nephew borrow my copy of "Your Money or Your Life" and reminded my niece to cash her graduation check.

Now, it's just time to prep for the work week.

Blueberry Muffins

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 18:24:00 +0000

A co-worker brought in some blueberries yesterday to share. So, today I made some blueberry muffins. Sorry for the lack of a picture with this post, but they did not come out looking cute. They tasted just fine, though.

I'm flash freezing them for the upcoming work week. I figure they will make good mid-morning snacks. I got the recipe from my old Better Homes and Gardens cookbook. The cookbook was a first-apartment gift from The Parents. It's a classic and really all you need - perfect for a 22-year-old on her own for the first time.

Question Everything

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 10:11:00 +0000

Lately, I've been stuck on the whole mortgage payment thing. My house is my biggest expense and my biggest threat to my financial goals. I'm upside down so selling right now is not an option. So, I've thought of the following options:

1. Paying down the mortgage with the goal of selling as soon as possible. This is the option that I've gone with.

2. Getting a roommate. Yeah. That's probably not gonna happen.

3. Move into an apartment cheap and rent the house. Except I don't think I have the personality of a landlord.

What I did recently, however, was to question my payments. You know I haven't looked at my auto or homeowner's insurance policies in nine years? Is that crazy or what? So, by sending a couple of emails and making a phone call, looks like I'm gonna be able to save about $193 a year on my homeowner's insurance and $252 a year on my car insurance. I'll let y'all know when everything goes through.

My dad was over at the house today doing yard work and wondered why the dryer was unplugged. I told him I was doing an experiment to see how much energy I could save by not using it for a month. He commented that it would only save a few pennies. I responded that they were my pennies. This conversation is so funny to me because growing up, we hung clothes out to dry on a clothesline. I know all about hard towels.

Bottom line is that I'm going back to my Dribbles and Drabs technique. My goal is just bigger than it was before.

Seeking the Minimum

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Tue, 15 Jun 2010 23:47:00 +0000

Yesterday, I returned a library copy of The Complete Tightwad Gazette by Amy Dacyczyn. The book is a classic for all frugal folks out there. There are some great tips, but I really love the essays on frugality.

In one of her essays, Amy talks about seeking the minimum. It's about seeking the minimum cost for the maximum enjoyment or efficiency. I thought about this because using the envelope system has made me realize that if I see I have money, I'll spend it.

I suspect that I could tighten my grocery and entertainment line items with minimal impact. So, as an experiment, I'm cutting in half those two budget categories from June 15th to July 15th. If I feel the pinch, I'll increase the amount. If I don't, I'll keep them there.

Should be interesting. This would put my monthly grocery budget at $80 and Entertainment at $20.

Today's Deal

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Thu, 10 Jun 2010 23:01:00 +0000

So, I received a $10 Kohl's gift card in the mail last week. The only trick is that you have to buy $10 worth of stuff.

I didn't need anything, but I do have several family birthdays coming up. I hate buying cards. They seem like a big waste of money to me. Then I remembered that Kohl's has a greeting card section.

I was able to pick up 4 cards for $2.32. Turns out they were having a buy 3, get 1 free sale. Couple that with my free small milkshake from Chik-Fil-A courtesy of a coupon and I was having a good day.

Envelope System Update

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Thu, 10 Jun 2010 10:07:00 +0000

The envelope system is going extremely well. Currently, I have envelopes for groceries and entertainment. I use my credit card for gas purchases.

What also is helpful is that I leave my checkbook at home. I did this first on the suggestion of Clark Howard because of the security risk. If someone takes your checkbook, they know how much money you have and your checking account number.

I found that by not having my checkbook close at hand, I can't see how much money is in my account. Therefore, I am more likely to depend on the cash envelopes rather than whipping out a card.

This weekend, I'm having a quilting buddy over so I'll forgo my weekly lunch out with the co-workers so I'll have enough cash to eat lunch out with her. Everyone at the job knows that I'm on a budget so it's not a big deal. It's nice not having to worry about that kind of stuff because it's planned for.

One comment - when the starter Dave Ramsey envelope system was a garish yellow, I used to get questions about it all the time. It opened the door to discussing finances and I usually left them with a tip card that had Dave Ramsey's 7 Baby Steps (they came with the Financial Peace University kit). Now because it is a sedate brown pleather, it is not as noticeable. I understand the upgrade (the newer one is holding up better), but it is just interesting.

Pillowcases for the nieces

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Tue, 08 Jun 2010 10:07:00 +0000

I promised my teenage nieces pillowcases way back at Christmas. They were disappointed that their brothers got homemade wallets and they did not get a craft gift. Well, last week the younger of the two reminded me. These took nothing but time. I used fabric and thread from my fabric stash.

This one is for the niece who wants to be a marine biologist. I thought she would like the fish.

This is for the silly niece. I thought she would like the butterflies. I do.

This reminds me that I really need to get started on making gifts for my Christmas 2010 Christmas shop.

Five Great Roses

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 10:11:00 +0000

I love rose bushes. I admit it. I'm even sort of a rose pusher. My mom who is a brown thumb gets a rose plant at least once a year and she hasn't killed them yet. The secret? Make sure you're getting a good return on investment by buying hard-to-kill roses. Here are some suggestions to get you started. (I live in Zone 7 if anyone is wondering).

1. Knock Out
Knocks outs are that garish lipstick pink color that I absolutely love. It's hard to kill this rose. You put them in the ground and you leave them alone. They are landscape roses and when they first came out, regular folks had a hard time finding them because landscapers bought them all up. I got mom the pink version. One year and it's still alive.

2. Belinda's Dream Rose
I'm sentimental. This was the first rose that I planted at my house. I stuck it in the lovely Georgia clay here and left it alone. It lived, so the next year I fed it a diet of banana peels, egg shells and coffee grounds. It loved it. To date, this rose has lived three years under the "care" of my mom.

3. Nearly Wild Rose
These are pink, landscape roses. In the South, you see them everywhere. They were the landscape rose of choice before Knock Outs stole their thunder. Still. They are pretty. They are constantly blooming. They don't need anything. Really. You don't have to feed these babies and they give you great color. I got my stash at the end of the growing season when they looked bad and were on clearance. The next year, they were just fine. I can't have prima donnas in my yard. My roses have to work hard.

4. Mr. Lincoln
The only hybrid tea rose that I have in my yard. It's as old as dirt (1964) and tough of as an old sailor. Oh man, the smell. Wonderful. Just like you would think a red rose should smell. And it does not have a patent so you are free to grow from cuttings legally...

5. Iceberg
While I can not personally vouch for iceberg, any rose that's been around since 1958 can not be a dud. Iceberg is used for shrubs and is white. My dad has requested a white rose for Father's Day this year and this is the one he's getting.

So, there are five rose suggestions. All were well worth what I paid for them and bring a smile to my face every time I pass them by in my yard.

If you have a rose that's shown great return on investment, let me know in the comments section. I'll be on the look out for them at the end of the growing season when everything is on sale...

Where to Get Books Free or Cheap

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 10:11:00 +0000

If you're a bookworm like me, getting a new book is like Christmas. But what if you're on a budget? Here are three places to get books cheap or free.

1. The library
This is so obvious, but are you really using your library to its fullest potential? Once I discovered the world of inter-library loan it was all over for me. I started ordering every book that I even thought I wanted. If you are unfamiliar with the process, ask your local librarian. I've found them to be very helpful. For the books that I could not get that way...

2. Paperback Swap
This is a great service, but you're going to have to wait if you want a popular book which all the cheapskate ones seem to be. The deal is that you post books that you have for swapping. When someone wants your book, you are notified. You send the book to the member who is requesting the book by Media Mail. For each book that you send, you receive a credit that will allow you to get a book through the system. Here's the web site - Paper Back Swap

3. Thrift Store
Different thrift stores will have different types of books. So, just because one Goodwill does not show promise does not mean they are all the same. It's like a treasure hunt. I like looking for books that I checked out and enjoyed, but am not ready to purchase yet. If you wait long enough, what you want will probably be here.

So, those are three options for satisfying your book cravings - the library, Paperback Swap or your local thrift store. Do you have any good ideas for cheap, book loving people? Holla in the comments!

How to Choose a Cookbook

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Thu, 27 May 2010 10:11:00 +0000

Eons ago I was giving a friend advice on choosing a cookbook. She said that it really helped her so, I figured I might as well write a post about it. So, while you're flipping through the cookbook at your bookstore thinking of making a purchase, ask yourself these questions:

1.Are these seasonings in my pantry?
It's easy to fool yourself into thinking that you are going to broaden your horizons. You probably aren't though. You'll end up buying one spice and it will sit in your kitchen getting old. If you're a salt and pepper and paprika kind of person (like I am), leave the exotic stuff alone. You won't use it and it's a waste of money.

2.Did I buy the basic ingredients for these recipes in the past month?
Again, we're looking for a cookbook that will actually be used. I bought a vegetarian cookbook once. Once. I never made one thing out of it. Because, uh, I'm not a vegetarian. I know you would think this tip would be obvious, but you would be surprised...

3.Can I understand the directions?
This list is made for the new-to-cooking people. If you can't understand the directions, if there are not a lot of pictures or if you need a reference book to get through a recipe, put it back on the shelf. You don't need it.

Well, there you go. Keep the questions in mind and you'll never end up with a cookbook occupying unnecessary space in your kitchen.

Nothing Wasted But the Paper

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Tue, 25 May 2010 10:11:00 +0000

OK. I'm gonna let y'all in on a secret - I love reading books for young adults. The fiction writers have to be able to tell a story well because the youngsters are not going to put up with as much as adults. The non-fiction writers really have to break down the subject to teach it to kids.

So, when I came across an autobiography by the writer Sid Fleischman it was a no-brainer. Of the entire book, the quote that stuck out for me was "Nothing wasted but the paper." It was during the time that Sid was beginning his writing career and took a class with a Mr. Brunner. Mr. Brunner would comment after Sid turned in his work that "nothing wasted but the paper."

I find myself saying that often. Like after I had to toss my cucumber plants because they came down with a disease or after reading my latest story that I want to bury in a drawer.

Every time you stretch yourself or do something new, you learn something. The time and energy that you spent was not wasted. It is valuable. You are building your skill set. Eventually, if you get through and push through, you become an artist.

All this from a book aimed at kids. You see why I love them?

Re-framing Yard and House Work

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Wed, 19 May 2010 10:10:00 +0000

Yard work seems incredibly masculine to me. I go through a whiny phase sometimes where I'm like, OK I gotta work full time, cook, clean, pay all the bills, plan for retirement with zero room for error and have the privilege of doing yard work.

Well. It is a privilege.

The yard work is still as smelly as ever (I have a motorized lawn mower, but it isn't self-propelled) and I still have the hill. What changed was my perception and it was a small one.

So, I've told y'all about how I'm on the Fly Lady bandwagon, right? Even though Fly Lady is for housework, I took the same re-framing to apply for my yard.

I'll explain.

Most of the time when I read articles trying to motivate women to clean their homes and to be organized it is based on other people. The articles state things like don't you want to be able to bring people over to your house or don't you want your kids to grow up in a clean environment or don't you want to bless your spouse by having a clean home?

Obviously, none of these motivational levers apply to me.

Fly lady, though, gave me an argument that I could not argue with - don't you deserve a clean house? Me. Not someone else. Not because I'm going to have someone over to the house or I'm planning to sell it. Don't I deserve to live in clean and organized environment? I decided that the answer was yes.

So, my "I deserve a clean house" attitude has carried over into my yard. I deserve a beautiful yard. After all, the most that it costs me is time and effort. And with that one switch, that one attitude adjustment, the work gets done. Happily.

Doing What Works - The Envelope System

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Tue, 18 May 2010 02:00:00 +0000

I've gone back to the envelope system. Which means that I take out the spending money I have budgeted for the week and place them in envelopes by category. Right now I have envelopes for Food, Entertainment and Clothes/Toiletries.

This works for me.

My dad says that he doesn't need to write a budget. And he certainly doesn't use envelopes. But I've put aside my pride and have realized (once again) that I work best with structure and boundaries.

Other people may not need structure, but I do. Plus, I can tend to go overboard so the whole budget is actually a calming thing for me.

Now I just have to figure out how to stop trying to cram a week's worth of projects in a day.

23 Things I've Learned in 38 Years

noreply@blogger.com (fandd) — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 10:00:00 +0000

I've recently turned 38. I thought that this would be horrible. I'm 38, single and childless. In so many people's eyes this would make me a failure. But actually 38 is turning out to be a good year for me. Much better than 35. That was really bad.

So, I thought it would cool to do a 38 things I've learned, but really I could only come up with 23.

1. Never give up on your dreams.
Sometimes I'll ask people when I'm out in about, "So, what did you want to be when you grew up?" There's always an answer. Everyone has dreams and if you don't go after them, they are not going to go away.

2. Pay attention to what people do, not what they say.
This will save you a lot of heartache.

3. Friends move in and out of your circle. It's OK.

4. If you're single, middle-aged and childless, then you are just single, middle-aged and childless. You are not selfish or a monster or a failure or in extended adolescence.

5. Loan and debt are four-letter words.
They limit your freedom because you owe someone else money.

6. Beauty is important.
I tend to only care if something is functional so this was a big one for me. Just this past week, I hanged a mini quilt I had finished in my laundry room. It looks so homey there. I also brought in some of the irises that are blooming in my front yard to set on my fireplace mantle.

7. Everyone is important.
Some folks look around at an office, decide who is important and then ignore everyone else. Yeah, that's a bad move.

8. It's OK to be different. As Dave Ramsey says, normal is broke.

9. In order to succeed you have to fail. So, fail early and often.

10. Say yes.

11. Be easy to work with.

12. Give and when you give, really give. Don't expect anything from the recipient. It will probably come back to you through someone else.

13. Turn off the television. I personally find I'm in a better mood when I'm not watching it.

14. Learn to produce.
Can you write a story, play an instrument, invent something or make something better? Is there something in this world that would not have been if you were not around?

15. Have integrity.
It helps you sleep at night. So, have your line and don't cross it. Then again, you'll have to be prepared for the consequences...

16. Have manners. Say yes, please and thank you. If you're a guy, open doors and give up your seat to older ladies. If you're a woman, learn to write a thank you note. This is a lost art form. You'll set yourself apart.

17. Go where you're celebrated.
The older I get, the less I tend to settle when it comes to friendships. I know my worth. I know that I'm a good friend. If someone can't see that, I leave. With most folks, you either click or you clank. If you're clanking, move on. It won't get any better no matter what you do for the person. Trust me on this.

18. Find what styles of clothing fits you the best and stick with those styles.

19. Keep learning.

20. Have a big, hairy goal each year.
Keep doing things that you think are impossible. It will stretch you when you make it.

21. Have more than one source of income.
That piece of advice is from my dad who always believed that you need a regular job to pay the bills and a part-time job that you love. If you get to the point where you're making enough to quit the day job, then that's great. If you don't, you'll have the part-time job to fall back on in case of job loss and you'll have something to do when you retire.

22. Try Out Routines and Schedules
They have been dismissed as not being "creative", but when I started looking at the writers, I admired, they are very organized, goal-driven people.

23. Ignore Dream Zappers
Negative people who are not successful do not want to see you being successful. This is not about you, this is about them. If you're able to do something then that means that maybe they were able to do it, too and so, uh, why didn't they do it?

I remember once been told by a coworker that I could not do something that I had already done. Yeah, that's how crazy it can get sometimes.

Hmmm, I think that's it for now. Maybe I'll add to the list next year. I'm actually looking forward to 40. My goal is to be unstoppable.