Beautiful bottle.

Beautiful name.

Amazingness.

Who, me? Why yes, you, my dear Sriracha sauce. My lover. My friend. 

I will slap this stuff on pretty much anything that hits my plate if the bottle is within my arm’s reach. It’s delicious on rice and veggies, sandwiches, wraps, in soups, drizzled over pizza, sushi and salads… you name it, I’ve tried it. My younger brother Matt is equally obsessed. I think I’ve even seen him put it on pancakes before. hehe.

Sriracha is spicy, but it’s also packed full of flavor. It packs just enough heat to leave your mouth a lil tingly, but also craving another bite. I’m truly in love with the stuff. I think Sriracha sauce has it’s own lil fan club around the world.

Hehe you really have to check out this hilarious blog post and their Ode to Sriracha Sauce. They even sell some apparel with goofy Sriracha comic strips.

My  lil brother even has the Sriracha shirt.

Quite the dedicated fan.

The other night I enjoyed some veggie brown rice sushi, with a homemade rice bowl–packed full of carrots, onion, peppers, kale, edamame, and crumbled sesame tempeh. So delish! It was of course made better with a generous helping of Rooster sauce! I sauteed my veggies in tamari, fresh ginger and a little fresh orange juice.

I know I’ve mentioned this on the blog before, but I keep my fresh ginger in the freezer to keep it at maximum freshness. It’s also much easier to manage when it’s frozen. After freezing, peel off the skin (on the portion you will be using) and use a microplanner to grate the ginger pulp into whatever dish you are making. Ginger has healing properties that are quite unique! It’s definitely a superfood!

Last weekend my sweeti and I finally busted out the grill! We grilled up a huge pile of fresh veggies, corn on the cob, and I even experimented a little with grilled fruit.

Peaches to be exact!

I took some organic canned peaches and rinsed off the canned juices, then I soaked them in a mixture of orange juice and freshly grated ginger. Once they were on the grill I continued to baste them in the ginger sauce until they were a little caramelized and began to brown around the edges. They turned out so amazing!

We also had a big assortment of grilled veggies and that delicious Florida sweet corn, which I picked up from a local Farmer’s Market.

This market happened to be at a pit stop I made they other day for gas in the middle of nowhere. I love discovering hidden treasures like that.

Back to the books for me! I hope you all have a wonderful holiday weekend! I’ll be buried in my accounting books all weekend. Baah!!

~ Peace, Love & Veggies xo

Summer school is crazy because they pack an entire semester (about 16 weeks) worth of material into a condensed summer period (6 to 10 weeks, depending on the course). So instead of 1 or 2 chapters a week, each class covers 2, 3 or even 4 chapters a week. A WEEK! Oh yes, and I’m taking 4 classes throughout the course of the summer. I must be crazy. Surely.

I would say there is a delicate balance between school, work, my social life, blogging, fitness and my boyfriend at the moment. It’s such a delicate balance that some parts have abandoned ship entirely (such as the social life, blogging and as much as I hate to admit it, fitness). It’s not a good thing. I go to the gym on the weekends (when my boyfriend drags me), and stuff my nose in the my accounting book otherwise. I haven’t seen my best girlfriend in over a month (insert tear), and we all know how bad my blog updates have been lately… sheesh. I really need to work on that :/

Although the moments are few and far between, I still try to cram a lil fun into my weekends if possible. Like enjoying brunch out with my sweeti! We went to our fav spot Ella’s Cafe in Seminole Heights, Tampa, for a lil “Soul Food Sunday” action.

We dined on black bean veggie burgers with avocado relish and fried onions (what’s a veg girl to do when the only other options are BBQ ribs and fried chicken!?) And also dabbled in a few choice side items such as the vegetarian collard greens, grits and homemade cornbread. Mmmmmm this meal was to die for! Truly!

We sipped on their mimosa special of the day, which was a combination of champagne, fresh watermelon juice and a splash of tequila. Dangerously delish. I made the mistake of popping a Zyrtec before the meal (I’ve had insufferable allergies these past few weeks–must be the pollen), and having three (yes, three!) mimosas before our food finally arrived. Let’s just say OTC allergy meds and alcohol do not mix very well. Correction, do not mix at all. I was shakey, feverish and nauseous for basically the remainder of the afternoon. It wasn’t too pretty. After a little internet browsing, my sweetheart of a man informed me that the allergy med website strongly advised against mixing alcohol with their product. I think they even used the phrase “potentially lethal” if I recall.

Huh. Who knew???

My new work schedule has taken a bit of getting used to, but now that I’m three weeks deep my body is starting to adjust. I have to be at work at 8:30 am every morning (eeeps!) so bedtime is usually around 10:30 these days. And trust me, I’m naturally a night owl so this has been an adjustment. I’ve been really good about packing my lunch for work every night before I go to bed, because I know it will be healthier and more planned out that way. So far it seems to be working. I sometimes go straight from work to class, so I try to bring along several snacks as well.

Most mornings start with a big green smoothie (typically spinach, kale, berries, melon and frozen banana) with Sunwarrior vanilla protein, flax oil, and a giant scoop of Green Vibrancy powder for extra vitamins and nutrients. Sometimes I throw in extra Spirulina for good measure too.

My lunches are usually pretty simple. I try to make veggies the focus, but I’ve noticed since I started my new job that I’ve been getting a little carb heavy lately, so moving forward I’m going to try to work on that :/ It’s a fine balance. I still have some pounds that I put on during my surgery recovery that I’d like to shed… but like I said, my fitness routine is taking a tole lately! Oyy!

This lunch had loads of fresh veggies including cucumbers, tomatoes and avocado, with a side of red pepper hummus for dipping. I also had a tempeh, veggie, brown rice and kale stir fry that I made for dinner the night before. I dressed the stir fry in a light ginger and tamari marinade that tasted delicioso for lunch leftovers! I also packed two brown rice cakes sandwiched with all natural peanut butter, an unsweetened applesauce and a Larabar. So this was a good lunch, but don’t get me wrong, if I don’t plan lunch out the night before I may just grab a bag of pita bread and a tub of hummus instead. (Not ideal, obviously)…

Overall the new job is going really well! Now if only I could get this darn summer school done and over with. Bah!

Did I ever mention my cat Phoebe is obsessed with popcorn? She begs for it. Seriously. Hilarious.

~ Peace, Love & Veggies xo

After catching up on numerous chores and work, I headed to Tampa for the weekend to celebrate Cinco de Mayo (and our semester being over!) with my sweetie. We hit up Ceviche restaurant in south Tampa for some delicious Sangria and tapas.

I was really excited to see the addition of no-sugar added “skinny” sangria on the menu (at first!), but after enjoying at least two glasses worth, my dining companions politely informed me (to my dismay) that they probably used splenda, equal or some other chemical sugar substitute instead. UGH! I hate fake sugar. I haven’t had it in years and I was kind of horrified that I was drinking it all night long. I hate the idea of putting chemicals in my body. Blah! But oh well, life goes on. Now I know for next time!

When we got home I made some vegetarian chili in my boyfriend’s teeny tiny crockpot, in his teeny tiny kitchen. hehe. So cute. It turned out really yum, except for the fact that I misjudged and filled the pot a bit too high. Needless to say, there was a counter full of chili run-off when we got home.

My go-to chili recipe is pretty simple. I chop up any veggies I have in fridge like carrots, zucchini, squash, celery, peppers, onion and tomatoes. I chop everything really fine, and sometimes even grate the carrots and zucchini. I top off the pot with a  can of tomato sauce, 1-2 cans of chopped fire-roasted tomatoes and 2 cans of beans (I did one can of kidney and 1 can of black beans this time around). I add a little S&P, chili powder, cumin and paprika and stir everything together. Chili is pretty much an “anything goes” type of dish so I’m not too picky. The best part is that you can let it cook in the crock pot all day long and not have to worry about it until you get home. Spoon it over brown rice and you are good to go.

Since the boyfriend and I were celebrating this weekend, we decided to go to downtown Ybor on Sunday afternoon. We started with some delicious brunch, and then took things to an outdoor venue for drinks and live music.

Ybor can be pretty wild and crazy at night, especially on the weekends. Lots of clubs and drinking holes! But it’s pretty relaxing and low-key on a lazy Sunday afternoon, and we had a really good time just strolling the streets and soaking up some sun.

We found an outdoor restaurant with some live acoustic guitar, and a make-it-yourself bloody mary and mimosa bar. Suhweet! Mimosas with guava and mango juice = to die for!

I definitely drank more than usual this weekend but sometimes a girl has to celebrate, right!? There is nothing better than a mimosa and a lil guitar music on a beautiful Sunday afternoon…

Okay maybe there is something a lil better…

… like my sweeti sitting next to me!!

Congratulations to the 2012 graduates, and Happy Cinco de Mayo to all!
~ Peace, Love & Veggies xo

What happens when you leave your Mac pro charger at your boyfriend’s house up in Tampa on a Sunday night? Well, I’ll tell you what happens. Your Mac pro dies around Monday evening and sputters its last lil breath. And then you are without your precious laptop until the following weekend when you can venture back up to Tampa to see your sweetie and reclaim your laptop charger.

Story of my life. I hated being without my laptop all week, but I survived! Thank God for iphones!

This is how I spent most of my week anyway…

…engrossed in my books and cramming for finals! Oyy! But hard work paid off! Finals are over, the semester is over, and I finished with a nice lil bundle of straight A’s. Weeeeeeee! Now I get 2 weeks off until summer school starts. Short-lived celebration, that’s for sure!

Last weekend my sweeti and I enjoyed a Sunday brunch at a new spot we discovered in Seminole Heights, Tampa. This place is called The Refinery, and it has quite the unique menu.

For brunch I had a quinoa dish served with a curried apple puree and topped with dried fruit and crackers for dipping. It was a really unique combo, and extra spicy, but I really enjoyed it! We also glanced over the dinner menu to see if we wanted to make a trip back for nighttime dining sometime in the future.

This is just the small plates selection. Such unique food combinations, and lots of veg and gluten free options. I dunno about the fried beef tongue (!!!!) but I can really appreciate a restaurant with such a fresh vibe. They use only local and fresh ingredients, and their wine and beer menu is superb. I know we will venture back for dinner sometime soon!

I’ve also been doing lots of cooking in my boyfriend’s teeny tiny apartment kitchen on the weekends. When we first started dating this kitchen was bare as could be. After a little help and persuading from yours truly, combined with a few donations of items that I had in surplus, he finally has things almost fully stocked!! Rice cooker, blender, juicer, pots and pans, veggie peeler, good knives… yay!

Making a little cold bean salad with fresh cilantro. Mmm! Lucky for me, my man loves almost everything I make. He appreciates that I follow a plant-based diet and he is even trying to transition to one himself. It’s sooooo much easier to have a partner that not only encourages and supports me, but also wants to better himself. I know I’m a lucky girl. See in the background–I bring him homemade Happy Herbivore baked goodies when I can

He even made the switch to Sun Warrior vegan protein powder, after watching Forks Over Knives and learning about the side effects of casein, the protein found in cow’s milk and whey. Speaking of which, my amazon order just arrived today!

In other good news…  I got a new JOB! I’ve been working at a small accounting firm since last summer, trying to get my foot in the door in “accounting land” so to speak. But the job was more of an internship… very little pay, little hours, and lots of grunt work. Not that I’m complaining, I still appreciated the opportunity to be there. Overall it was a really good experience for me and my boss is a truly fabulous lady who mentored me in so many ways. But now, I’ve upgraded! After doing a little searching I found a larger firm that was hiring a staff accountant, and I felt like my resume was just shiny enough to apply, so I did! After sitting nervously for 2 weeks I finally got a call back and scheduled an interview. I interviewed at 9 am on a Friday morning and got offered the position around noon. I was absolutely thrilled!

My new job has so many perks including better pay, more hours, my own spacious office, a boss who is still willing to be flexible with my school schedule, and it’s only a short 5 minute drive from my house. It’s literally a match made in heaven. I’ve been there a little over a week and it keeps getting better and better!

My own computer in my own lil office. Had to put my girls on my desktop of course!!

I learned a lot while I was job hunting this time around. Overall it was a really good experience for me, and I’m so glad I decided to put myself out there and see what I could get.

~ Peace, Love & Veggies xo

Anyway, enough rambling… onto weekend highlights!

My babe and I spent the weekend treating ourselves to some fun nightlife. First we played around downtown St. Petersburg, enjoying the beautiful Florida weather, nighttime ambiance, live music and of course yummy eats. My man has a big sweet tooth, and gelato is one of his favs!

We also ventured over to one of my favorite restaurants, Ella’s Folk Art Cafe in Seminole Heights, Tampa. Ella’s is hands down one of my fav stomping grounds for delicious and unique eats. They have an incredibly friendly staff who provide amazing service, and the restaurant often showcases local music talent on the weekends. The whole place has a very funky and retro vibe to it that is positively enchanting.

There are plenty of veggie options for me to choose from, including a mouth-watering black bean veggie burger, topped with crispy fried onions, avocado and curry aioli. (To die for!) They also have a vegan pizza option, and a microbrew selection that makes me drool. Ella’s is so amazing that we will gladly pull a stool up to the bar and wait for a table, even when the hostess quotes us a possible hour to hour and a half wait (although it’s almost always sooner!) We celebrated my birthday and New Year’s Eve at Ella’s this year.

I opted for the spinach salad with baby tomatoes, caramelized onions, cornbread croutons and grilled tofu. My bf went with the veggie black bean burger, which I gladly helped him finish off!

We also spent some time in Sarasota, and ventured downtown for a little dinner and dessert! This is He vs. She Desserts– I opted for the espresso martini and he went for some chocolate and coconut gelato.

After all the yummy eating this weekend I made sure to get my butt into the gym 6 out of 7 days this week! It feels so good to be back into the swing of things, but today my knee is reminding me quite forcefully that I had surgery 3 months ago, so I decided a few days of rest would be wise. Gotta recoup!

We also hit up the local hydroponic farm for some fresh produce, and blueberry pickin’!

Strawberry season is coming to a close but the blueberries are in full swing. They had all the usual suspects (kale, spinach, chard, onions, squash and so much more) but the blubes were my fav!

There were a couple of varieties of blueberry bushes, and all the berries were quite plentiful. I picked about 5 pounds in 20 minutes! Yumm!

Even better to enjoy on some oatmeal in the morning! (With a side of green juice of course)

In case you haven’t noticed, I finally started using Instagram! I held out until my droid completely and utterly died, and used my upgrade at Verizon to get an iphone 4. Yes, I am just entering this century so it seems, because I’m so far behind. But so far I looooove my iphone! One of the first apps i downloaded was Instagram and I’m officially hooked!

You can find me on Instagram  @lovesveggees 

~ Peace, Love & Veggies xo

This weekend I spent some quality time with my family, celebrating the holiday. Easter Day was full of food, drinks, and a gang full of people surrounding the television watching the Masters… while I busied myself helping grandma in the kitchen. I was in charge of desserts, so I spent most of Saturday evening in the kitchen baking. I made a homemade vanilla lemon cake with lemon curd filling, topped with lemon coconut frosting for Easter dinner & Grandmother’s 80th birthday celebration! I also whipped up a few batches of Happy Herbivore Carrot Cake Cupcakes with lemon cream cheese frosting. Everything turned out so delicious! The cake itself was a special request and was not vegan (I used this recipe here in case you are interested.)

This weekend my man came into town to visit and celebrate Easter with my family. We spent our afternoon in downtown Sarasota, eating yummy food, hitting up happy hours, and enjoying an impromptu visit at the local science museum GWiz.

First stop was a local hotspot that serves delicious microbrews and yummy eats using local and fresh ingredients. I had a veggie wrap with hummus, cucumber, tomatoes, leafy greens, carrots, and shaved fennel and beets. The fennel and beets added a hint of sweetness and made a perfect combination. (Not to self: must buy fennel next time I go to the farmer’s market!) Full Sail IPA is one of my absolute favorites. It’s made in Oregon and has a nutty and hoppy flavor without being too overbearing.

A little fun at the science museum. I’ve been a science nerd for as long as I can remember. I think I hit the jackpot because not only does my man have a science nerd side to him, he’s also a high school biology and chemistry teacher, so I love to pick his brain! Ha, no pun intended…

Playing with felt organs. hehe. We never did find the spleen (sigh).  

After the science museum we walked around a local park and sat and watched the sunset over the bay. It was a beautiful weekend, with perfect weather and surrounded with loved ones!

Happy Easter!

~ Peace, Love & Veggies xo

I could have easily dropped an entire paycheck in this shop. The shelves were lined with homemade and all-natural salt scrubs, bar soaps, body sprays, moisturizers and so much more! One of my favorite finds was an all-natural deodorant made with cocoa butter, baking soda and oils. I bought the mandarin orange scent and I’m completely obsessed!

I also snagged a few bars of soap, a “shower butter” bar made with oatmeal and cocoa butter, a lemon-scneted cuticle oil and a eucalyptus-speariment salt scrub for my mom.

The prices aren’t too shabby considering the quality ingredients in the products. A bar of soap sells for $7.00 or you can get  5 for $30. The salt scrubs were around $12.00.

The soaps came in every scent you can imagine! From Chamomile & Melon to Fresh Pumpkin to Papaya! I’ve been using my soap for about 2 weeks now and I’m so in love with the thick lather and intoxicating scent. There is definitely something to say for all-natural bath products! The best part is that Hickory Ridge Organics has a website for anyone to order! I’m thinking some of these products would make perfect gifts or party favors.

I’ve also become completely obsessed with the Juice Beauty product line. I stumbled upon a great review of their products on a blog I follow, and decided to give them a try.

My first order was for the Cleansing Milk facial cleanser, Exfoliating Cleanser and the Green Apple Smoothing Eye Concentrate. I fell so in love with their products after using them, that after the first week I was placing my next order. I added on the Antioxidant Serum, and the Oil-free Moisturizer. In fact, I even got my boyfriend hooked! After using my stash a few times he finally ordered some for himself, and now uses it daily. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten hooked on a product so quickly–but I’ve yet to be disappointed! The only snag is that their stuff is pricey. We are talking like $20 for a face wash. BUT, with that said, you are paying for quality, all-natural and organic products, without animal testing. There are some things I allow myself to splurge on, and face products are definitely one of them. It’s my SKIN after all. I want to take care of the largest organ in my body the best way I know how.

Just thought I’d let you all know that there are some fabulous quality products out there, you just have to look for them! I will search high and low to find products that are not tested on animals, and it’s an added bonus to find a product that I love this much! I was not compensated in any way for these product reviews, this was just a little fun post for me to share with you some of my fav stuff out there. Also, if you do decide to try something from Juice Beauty, be sure to sign up for their email newsletter FIRST, because they are constantly sending coupons and free shipping specials in their weekly email ads. Good luck!

~ Peace, Love & Veggies xo

This weekend my sweeti and I had the opportunity to go to a fabulous show–a burlesque show! If you don’t know much about burlesque, you really should learn. It’s a variety-type show that has been around for years and has quite an interesting history. The “strip-tease” burlesque popularized in the 1920s and 30s. The prohibition years put a bit of a clamp on the performances for awhile, but they flourished again in the 40s and 50s. Today, modern burlesque has emerged into many forms, but often includes cabaret, elaborate costumes, classy strip-tease and a little jest. Sarasota has our very own Black Diamond Burlesque Troop that does traveling and local shows.

The show was fantastic! One of my girlfriends from high school was in it and she did an amazing job. The costumes were full of glitter, feathers and sequins, and the girls took over the stage with grace, poise, and amazing stage presence. Not to mention confidence! I believe burlesque to be an artistic expression of sexuality, and independence. Some of the numbers were a little risque, but only enough to make a few men in the crowd blush.

We weren’t allowed to take pictures, so I snagged a few off their blog to give you an idea of what the show is all about. If you are ever in the area be sure to look them up and check it out! Modern burlesque troops are emerging all over, so you might just have something nearby.

My favorite part about the show was the confidence these women had, as they held their heads up high to strut their stuff in front of the crowd. Their bodies came in all different shapes and sizes, and they each had a distinct grace and beauty that was captivating.

The closest I’ve ever come to burlesque was posing for an artistic nude with a local well-know photographer. Albeit I wasn’t in front of a crowd, the experience was unforgettable. I believe I was 20 or 21 at the time, and the business I worked for leased an office next door to a local photography study. Of course I was nervous, hesitant and scared out of my mind going into it. Lucky for me I had known the photographer for years, and he always had a female assistant in the room to make things more relaxed and comfortable for models. I left that photo shoot a changed women. Especially once I saw the photos! They were very tastefully done, and touched up just enough to flatter the best lighting… I looked at the pictures and my jaw dropped as I began to finally understand the true beauty in the female body. In MY female body. My body that I have struggled with for so many years. Through an eating disorder, and distorted body image… we’ve had a love-hate relationship for a very long time. But looking at those pictures made me happy. And I’ll never forget them!

So rock on burlesque girls! You inspire ME, and so many others!

Here’s a cute video of one of the dancers that helped start the burlesque troop, and a little bit about what inspires her to do burlesque!

We decided to go on a Thursday to save a little money with weekend hotel rates. Not only did we take this trip last minute, we also headed out without ANY reservations or plans whatsoever. I was hesitant at first but in all honesty it was the most liberating feeling in the world, and I loved not having a certain place to be at a certain time. Although I am usually a planner, sometimes it’s good to change things up a bit!

Our cozy lil B&B, located in the heart of downtown St. Augustine. We got pretty lucky with a walk-in rate of $120 a night including parking, free wi-fi and breakfast.

Since it was my birthday celebration we started the trip off with a little vino on the patio!

We decided to forgo some of the standard touristy stuff. Once you live and travel in Florida, some attractions can be repetitive after awhile. Most of the museum rates and tours were kind of pricey, and to be honest the most important part was relaxing and enjoying each other’s company–so we did just that!

So what followed was a good deal of walking, talking, eating & drinking, a little shopping and tons of picture taking!

There were cute trolly rides for those inclined towards a guided  tour. (Although we tromped around on foot of course!) In the background is the historically acclaimed Flagler college.

Walking along the St. Augustine pier. The weather was perfect and the skyline was breathtaking.

Castillo de San Marcos, the oldest standing masonry fort in the U.S., first constructed by Spanish settlers in 1672. We walked the grounds of the fort and got a few good pictures in–had to do something touristy but didn’t shell out a dollar for this one!

On the first day we stumbled upon this cute lil coffee shop nestled in between the brick buildings. We loved this place and made sure to stop a few times for delicious chai cinnamon soy lattes!

Nectar of the Gods. heh. I admit, I am back to on-occassion java drinking (thanks to my coffee addicted influence of a boyfriend). But a coffee or  two a week won’t kill me, and my oh my how I love the taste! A coffee shop with almond or soy milk in stock, and I’m hooked!

Overall our road trip / mini-vacay was a blast. Sometimes it’s nice just to get out of town for awhile, even if it’s just a day or two. This was my first time experiencing St. Augustine and I’m sure we will be back!

A few money saving tips for road trips:

• Pack food and snacks. My man wanted to stop for lunch and snacks along the way but I insisted on packing them instead. I loaded up a produce bag with veggies and hummus, pita wraps, sweet potato chips and fresh waters. When it came time for a lunch break we were both happy to save a few bucks and have the healthier options.
• Try asking for a walk-in rate with your lodging. This doesn’t always work if you visit a busy location during prime season (although to be honest St. Augustine during spring break was peak season and we still lucked out!), but often times hotels will give you discounts or lower rates to fill up rooms last minute. Sometimes you can even bargain with small family-owned establishments. i.e. Pop your head into a place and say “We were headed to a place down the street, but thought to check out here first to see if you would offer a competitive rate.” 
• Try the free stuff! My man and I knew that this trip would be a little money, but it definitely saved us a few bucks to avoid all of the pricey museums and tourist attractions and do things on our own. We still picked up a few souvenirs and had some delicious food and drinks, but we didn’t add on the expense of the more costly tourist stuff, and we still had a blast!
• Make it short and sweet. We actually only stayed one night in St. Augustine. Our plan was to arrive early and stay late, with one night sandwiched in between. Although that didn’t go exactly according to plan (thanks to a little manly mistake of not paying attention to the GPS and driving an hour out of our way <— ha!!!), we still had a truly enjoyable getaway and only footed the hotel expense for one night.
• Avoid weekends & go during the week if you can swing it! Our one night stay in the bed and breakfast was actually on a Thursday, which shaved a nice $80 or so off the nightly rate compared to a weekend stay! In addition the town was a little less crowded and clustered during the week and there were more happy hour and weekly specials to enjoy!

Truly the best 28th birthday a girl could ask for!

~ Peace, Love & Veggies xo

My stress load has been a combination of financial issues, frustrations with my job, cramming in studying for exams and trying to get my physical fitness back in gear after my surgery recovery. It’s been quite a load to handle.

In addition to everything going on in my life I’ve had some horrible body image issues lately. I just haven’t been feeling that good about myself. You know the feeling, when you just can’t shake it? I can’t even put a finger on exactly why I’m feeling the way I’m feeling… but I know I don’t like it. I don’t feel strong, healthy or fit. I feel out of shape and lazy. I’m trying to get a handle on things, but it’s taking me forever! After a 20 min bike ride around the neighborhood my knee is hurting the rest of the day. After 30 min fast-walking on the treadmill (yes walking–jogging or running puts me in extreme agony) and I am sore as can be the next day. What is going on body!? Get it together! Pull yourself into shape and suck it up and  move on already. Endure the pain and toughen up! I cram these thoughts into my head and say them over and over again until I sound like a broken record.

In addition to struggling a bit physically, I keep making excuses for myself mentally. I find reasons over and over again to not go to yoga or ride my bike… I feel like I have an all or nothing attitude. I know I can’t do it well, so why bother doing it? I can’t push myself into my postures like I used to or ride my bike hard enough to get my heart rate up high, so why even bother? I try to remind myself I just had a very invasive knee surgery 2 months back. I need to be patient with my body and allow myself to get back into fitness from the very beginning. But it feels like I’m starting from scratch and my body has to relearn everything. It’s not just physically challenging but even more mentally challenging.

I’m really struggling. 

I know it’s okay to struggle, but I’m a perfectionist and it’s something that I have difficulty with. I know it’s okay to fail at something and have to try all over again. It’s okay to go back to the beginning…

But why do I feel like this?

LoL. Okay I loved Monopoly growing up. I can’t help it if my struggles remind me of a board game. teehee.

But, the good news is… today is my birthday. Another year older. Another year wiser… another year closer to 30… eeeps! I look at my life and the people in it, and what I’m struggling with on a daily basis, and the truth is…

The truth is I’m so incredibly grateful, in so many ways, for all of it. And I need to remind myself that once and awhile.

Happy birthday to me. I love you blog readers and friends, thanks for sticking around!

~ Peace, Love & Veggies xo