Criticism Often Flows From Insecurity

People who lack confidence, ability, acceptance or social grace sometimes feel a need to to compensate for their feelings of insecurity and inadequacy.  

They may criticize, put something or someone down to raise them self up. This provides a false sense of self importance, self righteousness and superiority.

It's the Fault Finding Feel Goods, making themselves feel good by putting something down, criticizing and complaining. 

The problem is, they are focusing on negatives, that's not the way to happiness or spiritual success.  It's also not the best way to get what you want. 

Describing what's wrong does not say what is right, focusing on what's bad does not express what is good, telling people what you don't like does not communicate what you do want.

Happy people avoid the Fault Finding Feel Goods and Avoid All Unnecessary, Non-Productive Negativity.

Unhappy people and critics can always tell you what's wrong, happy people often don't have a clue what they are upset about.

Critics Often Embrace A Critical World View - Everything is bad or unacceptable. They are critical of other people, inferior things, differences, unusual opportunities, you name it.  When you see so many bads and wrongs in life, it's hard to be happy, spiritually successful or confident. 

Criticism Causes Insecurity And Criticism Flows From Insecurity. Critics are often hypersensitive and especially prone to slights which is a symptom of their insecurity. 

The Solution: 

1) Recognize where critical tendencies come from and how damaging they are to happiness, spiritual success and emotional well-being.
     
2) Consciously embrace and practice a more loving, positive, accepting approach and perspective.
     
3) Build confidence by seeing opportunities and wonderful possibilities instead of the critical insecurity which limits your opportunities and separates you from enjoyable experiences, people and spiritual success.

Adventure:  Remember those dreadful events you have to attend where everyone is so boring?  Everyone there has something interesting, exciting and valuable to share with you, your challenge is to find it. 

Turn each interaction into a fascinating hunt where you are eager to discover each person's interesting, memorable, exciting qualities. Learn to enjoy meeting and greeting. Play host rather than insecure guest. 

Study how great leaders and political figures work a room.  It's a learned skill you can acquire if you are genuinely interested in other people. It's only possible when you appreciate and affirm and do not continually find fault.

This is far more interesting, exciting, rewarding and satisfying way to live than critical isolation.

Enjoy Yourself And Other People

Copyright 1999- , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Explore HappinessHabit.com the HappinessBlog.com  and Creating-Happiness.com.   Our materials may NOT be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors. Photograph from Dreamstime.com

The secret to enjoying work is to see each task or action as a satisfying achievement that moves you closer to success or a worthwhile goal.

Connect What You Have To Do
To What Is Important To You

Even the most boring jobs can support families well, allow you to achieve other life dreams or provide income to pursue activities that are truly important to you -  higher education, a hobby, sport, your music, writing, charitable goals or valued volunteer work.

Decide What You Are Going To Do And Find Ways To Enjoy It

Energy and enthusiasm to complete tasks well are just as important as developing good plans.

Excite Your Attitude To Energize Your Actions

Creatively change chores into interesting games, keep score, involve other people, tie everything you do to meaningful goals. Take pride in doing simple things extraordinarily well. 

Expect To Enjoy Your Work And
Find Ways To Make Work Enjoyable And Rewarding

Dreading or disliking what you have to do lets negative attitudes undermine your effectiveness and your enjoyment. If this doesn't work and you really dislike what you do, make changes.

Make Lists, Check Off And Celebrate Completed Tasks

Consciously celebrate successful completion of each task, step or section.  Continually celebrating success fuels your drive to achieve more.

See Happiness Habits At Work and the Happiness Blog for more on Happiness and "Work"

Copyright 1999-    , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Explore HappinessHabit.com the HappinessBlog.com and Creating-Happiness.com. Our materials may Not be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.

What are the keys to happiness and spiritual success in tough times when your economic well-being is threatened and severely stressed?

Here are highlights from the Happiness In Hard Times concept summary card that may help.  Explore Happiness In Hard Times for complete descriptions.

Action, Activity & Achievement Are Healing - Working hard on worthwhile goals is energizing, encouraging and empowering. Isolation and Inactivity are big dangers. Don't isolate yourself from people, positive experiences and opportunities that can help you.

Avoid The Fault Finding Feel Goods and
Avoid All UnNecessary, Non-Productive Negativity - these key Happiness Habits are especially important during tough times.  Amazing improvements in happiness come from simply avoiding unnecessary negativity.

Revol & Rebel - against situations and forces that distress or depress your spirits. Don't give them control of your thoughts, actions, feelings, time and attention. Don't help them hurt you. Simply say, "I am not giving you control of my feelings. I am not giving you the power to hurt me."

Don't Beat Yourself Up!  We are at our best and able to perform our best when we are Up, confident, energized, focused and happy.  Don't tear yourself down or hurt your ability to perform well.

Our Focus Determines Our Feelings - focusing on bad things makes us feel sad, anxious or angry. Shifting our attention to good things is energizing, elevating, encouraging. We never feel better by focusing on how badly we feel or on how poorly we think we are doing. Focus on what you want to achieve.

Move From Problems To Solutions Quickly - moving from problems to positive solutions makes us feel better. So does working hard to implement them.

Misery Is Meant To Make Us Move - Misery signals something has changed and something needs to change. We need to change to end our misery. We may need to change what we are doing, change how we are thinking, change how we are feeling, or change all three.

For more specific steps you can take to be happy in tough times explore the Happiness In Hard Times  and Happiness Blog web sites.

Copyright 1999-    , Michele Moore. All Rights Reserved. Explore HappinessHabit.com the  HappinessBlog.com and Creating-Happiness.com. Our materials may Not be published, broadcast, redistributed or rewritten without written permission from the authors.