My name is Eski. Eski is actually the alias of one of the Hinges, but that’s not important. What’s important is for me to vent the frustrations of my experiences in the land known as The Whale’s Vagina. Another bratty Hinge member by the name of Tim suggested I used a BLOG to vent.  I didn’t know what a blog was.  I know it has something to do with the computer, but I own a Commodore 64 (I don’t believe in upgrading something that still works).  Well, this is how my conversation went with that Tim guy:

Tim: Why don’t you blog your angry thoughts?
Eski: What’s a BLOG?
Tim: It’s short for WEBLOG.
Eski: What’s a WEBLOG?
Tim: It’s where you can type your thoughts on your computer.  It’s like an online diary for the world to see.
Eski: So, it’s safe for me to put my diary out on the coffee table for all my guests to read?
Tim: Not the same thing. Just create a blog account on eBlogger and post once in a while when you have some random thought you wish to share with the universe.
Eski:  Thanks, Tod.
Tim:  It’s Tim.  We’ve been performing improv together for 3 years now.
Eski: That’s too long.
Tim: What?
Eski: Nothing.  Can you put your clothes back on?  This is a Denny’s for Christ’s sake!!!

So there you have it. I will now use this blog thingy to share my ideas, frustrations, creations, patents, venereal diseases, other germs, and mostly to get some of you who would disagree with me, in a yelling match online using a lot of exclamation marks!!!!!

You may see my rants on my Friendster account as well.  So add me on there.  It’s like a social networking thing that seems pretty cool.  Not like that new crappy MySpace piece of shit they trying to push on people now.  Bunch of copycats!!!!

Xoxo XXX,

Eski

• Mispoken words
• Shaky accents
• Forgotten names

You call it a mistake? I say it’s a wonderful offer. (Just make sure to justify.)

Don’t worry, none of those happened. Though, I wouldn’t mind streaking on stage sometime. I’m talking about the two person scene in improv. Two people act out a scene and take on the personas of multiple characters in the scene. Never seen a two person scene? Check out some of the two person improv acts in San Diego if you get the chance. Chris George and Mike McFarland are one of the funniest two person acts to catch. (Tell them I sent ya).

I’m used to doing long form scenes with 6 to 8 people. This was the first time I would attempt the two person scene. Of course I was nervous, but how could anything go wrong when I was paired up with Antonio Salinas. The man known as the guy who has the most energy on stage.

Now I don’t know if it was the Vitamin B I took earlier that kicked in or the shots of Jack Daniels that loosened me up. But once we got a suggestion from the audience, we both went off. I felt like we could have done a whole one hour scene if we wanted to. The suggestion was “banana”, which caused us to create a scene with Peanut Butter Banana Carne Asada Burrito. Sounds good doesn’t it? Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.

After the show ended, I knew it wasn’t the Vitamin B nor the Jack Daniels that made my creativity go off. It was the fact that I was having a lot of fun with where the scene was going. The one thing I’ve learned from an improv instructor at Improv Olympic was that when you’re doing a scene, you have to have fun or else your scene will end up being boring.

Now that the show was done, I’ve been thinking. Should I start a Gio and Antonio show? Or as Antonio would call it, The Antonio and Gio show? I think I’ll workshop the two person scene a little bit more before I consider it.

Now what about this Peanut Butter Banana Carne Asada Burrito? Well… don’t try it with Peanut Butter……. But do add banana. It’s good.

Typically, the way the process works is that a few Hinges put their heads together to write scripts for some quick, 30-second sketches, then we get together in a bootstrapped studio to shoot them. What surprised the hell out of me was the sheer amount of comedy that miraculously sprang up outside of the scripted sketches. We thought it’d be selfish to keep all the laughs to ourselves, so behold: The Hinges Scenes That Weren’t.

WARNING: naughty language, and Tim’s nipples lie just behind the Play button. This was your warning, warning you that a warning is in effect!

What do you think? Is there some real material in there, or what?

There are many ways to sum up our reactions (and trust, they will be recorded for posterity on this very blog shortly), but in the meantime, we’ll allow Al Gore to give you the gist:

We can’t thank you guys – our fans – enough for all your support, as well as iO West for giving us such a rare and fantastic opportunity. Seriously, we’re humbled by the love, y’all. So tell us: how do you think we should celebrate? Sound off in the comments below!

Oh, Snarf, you know we’d never leave you out in the cold when it comes to recapping our greatest show in (goldfish) memory!

Wait, what were we talking about again? Oh, yeah – Hollywood, baby! So, without further ado, here’s a video reconstruction of just what happened on the fateful day we took that stage:

Things to watch for:

• Adam‘s earliest childhood memories – the source of his power
• What Harold found in the hotel parking lot (hint: it wasn’t valet parking…oh no, it definitely wasn’t valet parking…)
• Things you can catch in Hollywood…

(Again, and we can’t say it enough: THANK YOU to the kind folks at iO West for giving us an awesome stage, an incredible crowd, and one of the best nights of our lives)

If they'd called it the Neutron Theatre, there'd be no charge...geddit?

To begin with, we ran two back-to-back shows at the amazing Ion Theatre in Hillcrest, with different formats for each! First up was our standard long-format show that takes a single audience suggestion, and establishes three parallel scenes that somehow interconnect in the third act. Yeah, yeah, it’s the show you know and love more than the Colonel’s secret recipe (who am I kidding, we never get tired of hearing how much you love it ).

Show #2, however, flips the imaginary script by doing away with everything except for 2 players, who take a suggestion and then create a 15-minute scene starring only themselves – and they have to play every character in that scene! We fell in love with this format from the very first time we practiced it, partly due to our inherent schizophrenia, but mainly because it forces us to focus intensely on everything our partner is saying and doing. Seriously, it’s like couples therapy for comedians. The downside of this format is that it’s super-easy to lose the plot if you’re not paying attention…and if that happens, you’re basically forced to do an Ashlee Simpson jig until you can pick up the thread again…

As if new show formats weren’t enough, we also had the pleasure of awesome local San Diego newshound Chanel Castro interviewing Mount Helix’s favorite son, our very own Antonio Salinas about the history of the group, and writing up a review of the show! Here’s an entertaining video she cut together of our show, in case you missed it:

Trust me folks, this is like the first time I’ve ever seen Antonio putting on such a stoneface…Why so serious, Salinas?

The truth captured in this video is far, far worse…

That’s right, we’re now just 10 days away from our big debut show at the famed Improv Olympic West in LA! You’ve probably seen us all squawking about this on Facebook and Twitter, but this is a big deal for us. After all, iO is the comedy training ground for some of our absolute idols, including Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. If the names do nothing for you, then perhaps a show of their awesome skills will convince you:

Don’t get me wrong, we love performing all around San Diego, but the opportunity to bring our show to a whole new audience has us psyched up to an incredible degree – so anyways, if you’re in LA and enjoy laughing, like, buy a ticket why don’tcha?

The night kicked off with a trio of awesome stand-up performances from Dan Simmons, Greg Sanchez & Chip Nicholson. Each had the audience rolling with laughter for stretches, which meant a warmed-up audience for us!

Here’s a quick run-down of the show:

1. Halftime

• Antonio Salinas
• Gio Tejada
• Harold Randolph

2. Minus One

• Adam Rudder
• Jason Amunwa
• Jess Mandeville
• Kevin O’Connor
• Vanessa Anton

3. Pan Left, Pan Right

• Aaron Bornstein
• Jenna Carlson
• Sean Fitzgerald
• Tim Goggin

4. Long Form A

• Adam Rudder
• Antonio Salinas
• Jason Amunwa
• Jenna Carlson
• Jess Mandeville
• Sean Fitzgerald

5. Long Form B

• Aaron Bornstein
• Gio Tejada
• Harold Randolph
• Kevin O’Connor
• Tim Goggin
• Vanessa Anton

6. No Minor Characters

• Everyone

7. Slideshow

• Jess Mandeville (narrator)
• Tim Goggin (narrator)
• Everyone else (slides)

8. Harold

• Adam Rudder
• Gio Tejada
• Jason Amunwa
• Jess Mandeville
• Kevin O’Connor
• Tim Goggin
• Vanessa Anton

9. Irish Jig

• Everyone

In lieu of the standard play-by-play breakdown of each scene, I figured it would be best to ask some of my fellow Hinges for their favorite moments from the show. What follows is an actual email exchange:

My favorite moment was Kevin breast-feeding on Tim’s breasts (in the 2nd Long Form), which shocked the audience. Also Antonio holding me upside down (in Halftime and Slideshow). And Vanessa downsizing me (also in the second Long Form).

- Gio Tejada

The most awkwardly fun moment was Tim and Harold making out (in the 2nd Long Form). And of course, Halftime kicked ass… I loved how you started the game at 30-second speed and really upped the bar.

- Adam Rudder

I loved the Pillar of Light group game (in the Harold) where everyone shared the ridiculous things they do when they see someone cute in a bar. Many a truth is told in an improv scene

- Jess Mandeville

In Pillar of Light, I also loved the crazy moments:

• Tim: “When I’m in a bar, and I see someone cute, I think about what I’m going to say to that person… And then I don’t say it.”
• Jess: “I try to hide my crazy so they would like me.”

- Gio Tejada

Haha Gio/Jess! I said I throw up my arms and run out the bar like a little girl, to which someone in the audience heckled me and said to grow some balls!

- Adam Rudder

I love how I got hit in the nuts (during Halftime) and still continued the scene! THE SHOW MUST GO ON!!

- Antonio Salinas

Did anyone say anything about the facebook long form? I loved how confused Jess was about the whole concept of Facebook. Oh and trying to send attachments through Facebook as well. Antonio would just not get any work done until this was possible.

- Vanessa Anton

Dude, Gio getting turned upside-down in Halftime was huge – the crowd loved it, and I think it really kicked off the show’s energy.

- Jason Amunwa

As for my favorite moment…

I nearly lost it when Adam and Jason were the last two people left in ‘Minus One’. Each completely altered the mood of the scene hilariously by turning a polite pre-date phone call into a catty gossip conversation. We later heard from Adam that he couldn’t quite make out what some people were saying in early run-throughs of the scene, so he was forced to guess when he later took on the roles of eliminated cast members. Lucky for us because that turned into a really funny moment.

Like ‘em or love ‘em? Share your favorite Hinge moment from the St. Patrick’s Day show in the comments below!