Hypnosis NLP Southern California

Relationships and the 4 keys to intimacey

Michel Benzamin-Miki — Wed, 01 Dec 2010 07:04:14 +0000

The first relationship is the one we have to our selves, and the first key to intimacy is to like oneself. Their is little to no foundation for loving others when we don't have the ground of friendliness, acceptance, compassion, and gratitude that comes from the experience of liking oneself.

The second key is being able to appreciate others. When we appreciate others we can separate ourselves from the object of our love, and see them as they are, and then truly celebrate their uniqueness.

The third key is to be open to change. This applies whether you are in an established relationship or a developing one. Change is a constant in life, whether we are conscious of it or not, so rather than constantly moving away from our fears of being alone and unloved, why not move towards what is whole, nurturing and loving inside and around us. Move from change to deliberate change. Change on purpose, for the purpose of intimacy.

The fourth and most crucial key, is to be ready to grow. Intimacy is the experience of love, its nature is boundless, like our capacity for love. We will always be moving to greater levels of intimacy to ourselves, others and the world around us. As the poet Rumi once said "Bite off the head of Fear."

In my coaching and work with clients the most common fear is that of intimacy. Relationship work is important, no matter what the relationship is.

Call me or email me to set up a free strategy session. From this we can see if we can work together towards your relationship goals.

mbm@fivechanges.org 310.339-3531

The artwork above is mine and illustrates a line from my father's poem titled "The other universe" in which it says, "The sky's dress is ten thousand shades of blue" my art website is www.michelebenzaminmiki.com

Emotional Choice ~ Take Charge of your Mindset

Michel Benzamin-Miki — Tue, 10 Aug 2010 17:54:26 +0000

Imagine a world of emotional choice, where we have more choices and emotional range. It would be like playing a musical keyboard – with the full scale of notes available to us – to inform and inspire us, instead of only playing the highest and the lowest notes, disappointment – depression, desire – excitement, back and forth and back and forth…

Imagine moving fluidly, through our emotional landscape, choosing the satisfying and appropriate emotions in order to respond to our environment, and circumstances, and eliciting those emotions that nurture and motivate us towards our goals. The good news is – it is possible to live in this world and to thrive on your terms.

Most of us grew up missing out on certain emotional experiences, and wishing we did not have those certain others, and we were taught, that there are some emotions that are taboo to feel, let alone express. Emotions govern our behavior and sense of well being, nevertheless, many people ignore the importance of their emotions, without realizing how essential they are for achieving their goals in the world. Image and presentation play an important role in how we are perceived by others, however, inner congruency and true success, comes from choosing how to respond emotionally. Your ability to choose your options is the key to your freedom.

We are all emotional beings with the capacity for intelligence, fluidity, freedom, and choice in how we experience emotions. You will be on your way to emotional choice when you appreciate that there is a wider range of emotions than you may currently experience; and when you understand that each of your emotions carries vital information, each of your emotions is communicating with you.

The work I do with my coaching clients almost always begins with helping them move from being stuck in specific negative emotions. But it's not just a question of getting rid of bad emotions. It is important to understand how even the most painful emotions are communicating valuable information. It is in transforming limiting emotions, reinventing them, and using them creatively that the internal congruence and the achievement of desired outcomes can be attained.

The emotions that appear as obstacles, often become the key elements of your transformation. Call me for a free, no-obligation, strategy session, to see what work we can do, to transform those old stuck emotions – 310.399.3531

Related Blogs

Fears Phobias Anxieties

Michel Benzamin-Miki — Wed, 09 Dec 2009 01:30:59 +0000

In my hypnosis practice in Los Angeles, probably the vast majority of my hypnosis clients come to me because of fears of one kind or another.

Do you imagine lions and tigers and bears, lurking in the shadows? Maybe you like to be scared out of your wits, like when you go to a scary movie, or an amusement park, or a haunted house on Halloween. I remember enjoying scary tales when I was a child. I looked forward to my mother or father telling them to me

The fears we feel from stories or movies are different from the fears that haunt our daily lives. When irrational fear stays with us, day in and day out, and limit what we can do, they are a problem. They can paralyze us – as when agoraphobia prevents you from leaving the house, and they can cause health problems!

Our nervous system is designed to protect us. The emotion of fear is a response to something that has not yet happened, and the fear informs us to act rapidly and decisively. This is when fear is working as a messenger, coming in only to alert us to possible danger.

Let’s say a child strikes a match, then touches it, and gets the message that fire burns. The child develops a a respectable relationship to fire. But imagine another young child who is trapped in a house fire, who is rescued, and then rushed to hospital to be treated for burns. You can imagine that this child’s relationship to fire may be very different, and may involve a measure of significant associated fear.

I use the example of fire; but people develop excessive irrational fears of many things based on sensitizing events that may be far less significant than being caught in a house-fire – fear of dogs, fear of flying, fear of water, fear of public speaking. The list goes on and on.

I use Hypnosis and NLP in my Los Angeles hypnotherapy practice to help you change the way significant memories perpetuate irrational fear. Knowing why you are afraid of something, whatever it is – fire, failure, public speaking, intimacy, being alone – may not be enough. Hypnosis helps transform the unconscious momentum that perpetuated the old fear to give you entirely new options, and a new relationship to what you were afraid of.

Accelerated Change

Michel Benzamin-Miki — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 04:22:23 +0000

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