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White Man Dating Black Woman – 3 Tips For Successful Interracial Dating

2012-12-06T22:54:00.001-08:00

Right, my plan, for a white man dating black woman, is to lay out some simple techniques that will empower you with the skills to get the attention you deserve from the hottest black woman and really win in dating. These techniques will be broken down in three steps.

Here are the tips:Finding Singles

1) Stand Out From The Crowd: The first thing you need to do as a white man dating black woman is make sure you stand out. You see the issue is the hottest black women get a lot of looks. They know they are hot! So do not just be another wolf whistling clown!

So what do I mean? Well if you are shouting out to her and boring her with the predictable lines you are finished, period! So instead of the male ego, show her you are real man with a sincere heart. Approach her and just be a real white man dating black woman.

2) Tell Her What She Wants To Hear: Once you have shown that you are different, now you compliment her on how good she looks. She will be more receptive now that you have broken the initial barrier, are you with me?

Do not over do it though with the typical white man dating black woman zeal, just a few subtle compliments to make her feel stunning.

3) Tell Her You Will Be Taking Her Out: Now that you have passed the first few crucial tests for a white man dating black woman, you need to step up to the next level. You need to show here you can be confident and assertive. Instead of begging her for a date, tell her you will be taking her out next week.

What do I mean by that? Well, it is simple. Stunning black women have the pick of the bunch. This means that they are in high demand. With that comes hard work simply because they can afford to be picky and choose the best white man dating black woman prospect. Believe me if you had women chasing you on a daily basis, even you would get sick of it! Are you with me?

The only way to stand a remote chance of dating stunning Ebony women is to do something different from the rest. You need to make her feel that there is something unique about you. With that in mind, here is a bonus tip to help you achieve that:

Bonus Tip) Black Woman In Distress Technique:

This is a sneaky little trick that just works. It is a bit childish to be perfectly honest, but who cares! The main thing is that you want to get a sexy black woman and stand out from the crowd. Basically you get one of your friends to help you. He needs to approach a great looking African American woman on your behalf. However he is going to do everything wrong. What do I mean? Well he is going to act like a nerd and make life easier for you.

All you need to do is approach them and intervene. Tell him to get lost and ask the lady if she’s OK. Now you have won major points in her mind and you have not approached her like any other. You just have to relax and be yourself from now on, the hard work is all done.

Trust me she will love your confidence and leadership. All you need to do now as a white man dating black woman, is be yourself on the date because all the hard work has been done.

Is interracial sex better than sex with someone within your own race?

2012-12-05T01:07:00.000-08:00

interracial sex

The other day, I google searched interracial sex… all I got was a massive array of porn sites (what was I expecting anyway?). Well I was hoping to get some insights on the above topic.

Have you ever had sex with someone outside your race? Would you be interested in having sex with someone of another race? Is interracial sex a taboo to you? This is a very controversial topic. “Why the hell would someone prefer to have interracial sex?᾿ most people may ask.

The truth of the matter is that the US is a culture obsessed with interracial sex – both positively and negatively. Going by the history of the slave era white people spoke with repulsion about interracial sex – even though many white men were constantly having sex with black women. In this “colorblind era᾿, people are still obsessed with interracial sex.

According to a poll done on the blog, majority (67%) of the people that participated in the poll said interracial sex is better than sex with someone within their own race and 15% said it wasn’t better. The rest either never had interracial sex or same race sex.

Adult sex dating among interracial singles is much in practice especially among liberal communities and long-term relationships or matrimony is quiet popular. With the internet being a general platform that brings all types of people, cultures and societies together, we need not emphasize the kind of catalyst it is for those interested in interracial dating and sex… it is a well-known fact.

Most people may decide to try out interracial sex just for the kick of it or out of curiosity. This has brought about statements like “once you go black you never go back᾿ among many others. Given the sexualization and stereotypes surrounding interracial sex, we find most people… especially in their teenage and college life engaging in interracial sex just to prove and disprove such statements.

Most people may not publicly say “interracial sex is: bizarre, disgusting, exciting, adventurous, morally repugnant,᾿ and so on. But when people get behind closed doors with their family and friends comments like “That black dude must have really been packing some heat below the belt. Why else would those white women be interested in him᾿ or “Only white women with no self esteem will get with a guy like that.᾿ When they go online to search for interracial porn, they are thinking it… and don’t get me started people expressing their thoughts with by leaving anonymous comments on blogs.

So what is wrong with enjoying sex with a person of other race?

For some reason, people think interracial sex is exotic and daring… especially when it involves Black men and white women and Asian women and white men. It’s almost like people believe that race is correlated with penis size and a person’s level of sexual desire. But are people who engage in interracial sex are deviant, rebellious, daring, gross, odd, oversexed, and ugly as most people believe?

If you’ve had interracial sex already, how good or bad were the encounters? Is it possible that they had everything to do with the guys’ or ladies’ performances, and not the person’s races?

8 Reasons to Date a White Man

2012-12-02T23:09:00.003-08:00

I am married to a Black man—dark-skinned, 100 percent cocoa. To me, there is nothing more physically beautiful on this earth. Notice I said physically. Outside of that, there are plenty of more financially, intellectually and emotionally stable options. It’s time to taste the unknown. There are just too many—too many bright and beautiful single Black women waiting for their Black prince charming, only to see more and more of them riding off with their porcelain-skinned beauties.

My question is what are you waiting for—a baby and no ring? Black men are obviously seeing a lot in others they like. As an open-minded woman, I can tell you from experience some things about white are right. In no particular order, here are the reasons you should be giving vanilla a chance.

1. THEY OPEN WIDE INSTEAD OF DOWN LOW

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Gay White men tend to be more forthcoming about their status with family and friends. The down low phenomenon is less prevalent, which preserves the battery usage on your gaydar and relieves the stress of dissecting every male relationship.

2. NOT LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO TAKE CARE OF THEM

dating black woman

Thanks to the absence of family, fathers and marriage in the Black community, a great number of our men have backward expectations when it comes to romantic relationships. A higher percentage of White men come from stronger family structures and more traditional gender roles, where the men seek to care for the women.

3. ATTEND AND GRADUATE FROM COLLEGE

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Black women are graduating from college and Black men continue to drop out. As a result, degrees become intimidating when dating Black men. In White culture, education is valued and expected. Thus, White men have no problem dating educated women with advanced degrees. It is impressive rather than intimidating.

4. AT LEAST ATTEMPT TO MARRY BEFORE MAKING BABIES

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For whatever reason, White men just don’t have children sprinkled all over the world like Black men. And, if they do, most of them were married to the mother at some point. Sure, they divorce but you can only divorce if you at least attempt a marriage.

5. THEY DON’T GLAMOURIZE IGNORANCE

dating white man

They may listen to rap music, but they are smart enough not to act it out. The “thug life” is not something to be aspired. White men have a firmer grasp on what really defines manhood.

6. FINANCIAL PLANNING AND STABILITY

black woman dating white manhttp://www.blackwomenwhitemendating.com/

Black people, especially men, are always trying to shine—often spending more money than they have. White men tend to be more educated in the area of finance with a greater understanding of retirement planning, savings, investments, etc. This is mostly due to a higher level of exposure and teaching, but all that matters is they know and make better decisions than Black men when it comes to managing money.

7. HAVE THE ABILITY TO LOOK BEYOND YOUR PAST

afro woman dating white man, interracial marriage

Ever wonder why White people can date the friends of exes and so on? It’s because they don’t let the past hinder the present. Promiscuous Black men think they deserve to settle down with virgins, and allow past relationships to haunt the present. Not White men. They have no problem turning a hoe into a housewife.

8. DON’T TAKE EVERYTHING AS A CHALLENGE TO THEIR MASCULINITY

white man dating black woman

Intimidation and insecurity are two reasons for the rift between Black men and women. As a result of their insecurities and low self-esteem, Black men are intimidated by the strength of an educated and ambitious Black woman. Rather than seeing her as a strong teammate, she is a threat to their manhood. Thus, they feel the need to overcompensate. White men, on the other hand, are more secure. What Black men see as threatening is what makes a great wife and business partner to them. Do you agree?

What do Black Women want from a relationship?

2012-11-29T19:14:00.001-08:00

Dating black woman

When it comes to relationships everyone has a different opinion about what they want from someone else.

As a Black Woman, do you really know what you want from someone when it comes to a relationship?

If you ask different Black Women about what she wants from a man depending on her age and where she is in her life most women want a man who will love, honor and respect her. They would like a man who will not disrupt her life but enhance it, a man who knows who is and who wants to be in a relationship with her.

When it comes to the male to female ratio there are more single black women available and ready to date than there are Black Men.

There are some Black Women who are willing to date outside of their race. Race is not a factor if a man is worthy of her time. There is nothing wrong with a woman who understands her value and what she can bring to a relationship. A woman has to know her self worth in order to attract someone who is worthy no matter what race he is.

As a Black Woman, what are you looking for from a relationship? Are you willing to date outside of your race? What do you feel are some of the challenges of dating today?

The Best Places to Meet Black Men

2012-11-29T19:09:00.000-08:00

Mothers always say: If you want to meet men, you have to go to where the men are. You're more likely to have men vying for your attention if you go to places where men far outnumber the women. In general, if you're looking for a serious relationship rather than a one-night stand or a fling, don't put too much stock in clubs and bars. Most men go there to pick up women for short-term fun. But if you're looking for a man to share something more lasting, here are a few places that black men particularly like to frequent.

Churches

meet black man in Churche

Whether Christian, Muslim or New Age, most black men believe in God or a higher power and gravitate toward churches and spiritual institutions. The upside of meeting men in church is you may meet a man who is spiritually strong and may therefore treat you well. Sit within eyeshot of the guy you like--make sure he has a good view of you during the service, though you don't want to be caught looking at him. Try not to approach men directly, but be present at most social events of the church about 30 minutes after church is over to make yourself available to any men who may want to strike up a conversation.

Driving Range

meet black man in driving range

Taking up golf will exponentially increase your chances of meeting an interesting black guy. While you may think the basketball court would be the most likely place to find black men, actually the number of black men who have taken up golf and are playing golf consistently has increased greatly in the past 20 years. Because it's rising in popularity, you'll find a lot of black men at the driving range. Not only that, he'll probably be a black man who's financially secure since golf is such an expensive sport. There is one woman for every 50 men at the driving range and at least 40 percent of the men there are single, claims a blogger named Eathan (see References below). You'll probably have guys falling over themselves to help you with your swing.

The Gym

meet black man in Gym

Many black men like to work out and lift weights, so the gym is an excellent place to troll. When you meet a guy at the gym, you'll at least know that you share a hobby--working out. The free-weight area is one of the best places to bump in to men eager to give you lifting pointers. The pool and the sauna also are great places to make contact with men. If you've got a great body, showing it off at the gym is a sure-fire way to get some attention from men, as well as a few asking for your number.

The Supermarket

meet black man in supermarket

Everybody's gotta eat and black men are no exception. Stop going to the market in sweats, T-shirt and no makeup because the grocery store is teeming with single men. You may happen to bump into an attractive guy in the meat aisle, or by the bakery. Forget self check-out. The check-out line is a great place to strike up a conversation with a cute guy. Perhaps ask his advice about a recipe. More men are cooking for themselves--and you'll at least know you're getting a guy who knows how to go to the grocery store.

And also more and more singles choose the Online Dating Site to meet black men.

Where to meet single black women for dating?

2012-11-29T18:30:00.001-08:00

Where to meet single black women for dating and marriage is the question that men have in mind. The online dating service is the best method to meet them these days. As we live on this internet century, looking for women seeking men on the Internet has been a phenomenon. You have a chance to meet women online with a few simple clicks. The internet is the ideal way to meet them. Online dating service has become more popular since thousands of relationships are created yearly. As seen on national TVS, many successful love stories are generated through these dating websites. Now, you can meet a beautiful single black woman in a safe and relaxing environment. Most single men think that they have to pay for expensive cost when meeting women online. This isn't true when you use totally free black dating sites. You are free of charge for using costless dating sites. You don't pay any cent. There is no hidden cost. You know what I am saying.

meet black woman for dating

Can you meet single black girls at the bars or night clubs? Yes, you can. However, you can't find the high-end quality women at such places. I have many friends who are clubbers but they found short-term relationships at these places. Most of dates they met last a few weeks or months. Let me ask you this question, can you marry a girl you meet at a bar or club? You may be worried about that. You will have a hard time of making that decision.

You can meet single women in other places like churches, grocery stores, volunteer, and others but none is like online dating services. The internet dating sites have been booming in the last few years that attract thousands or even millions of singles sign up. You know why they sign up at such dating sites. Because online dating really works well for singles. It is easy and simple to find love and relationship and marriage through online dating services these days. All you need is to register for a personal profile and start searching for singles in your area.

As you know that the population of single black women is higher than men in America. So, you have a chance to choose the best one online. In other words, single black girls are desperate to find a partner online. You only need to get out there to find an ideal one. Most of black ladies are loving, caring, and beautiful. As you know that women are different from men. Single black girls are desperate to date Mr. Right when he comes to knock on the door. That means men usually have to approach first. What you need is to go online and contact her instead of waiting her to contact you. You know that single black women are lonely. So, if you can come at these black dating sites to find women. It is recommended that you search for single women seeking black men in your area, unless you want to long distance relationship. First, just try to find ladies in your area and contact with the ones you like.

Single black women usually maintain close ties with brothers, sisters, nephews, nieces, and friends. They are lonely and single as well as sex-starved. As you know that most single black girls have different ways of dealing with sex and still lack of sex. Most single women are not as health as married women. Anyway, you know something about single women in general. To tell you the truth, each single black woman is different than others. Some of them are eagerly looking for the right partner while others are not. However, single black ladies you see online are those who look for love and relationship. So, there is no rejection to ask them online. You will not need to face her physically. You only virtually see her. Take action to search for thousands of single African American women looking for men at black dating sites and contact the ones you like the most. Good luck!

Meet Black Women - Are You Looking For A Sexy Black Woman?

2012-11-27T22:43:00.000-08:00

dating sexy black woman

If you're a black guy you probably meet plenty of black women, just through family. Thank goodness, with each new generation integration in most western countries is getting easier, more natural, in fact it isn't even integration any more, kids truly are colour blind unless they have parents with racist attitudes. You may fancy and want to meet black women, but aside from the fact you find their skin tone and features attractive, you should be colour blind too. However, if you're a white guy who's attracted to and particularly wanting to meet black women you might find it a little harder to hook up if you don't come into contact so very much.

Be you black or white, the easiest route to meet people of a particular ethnicity is internet dating. There are specialist sites for men wanting to meet black women and black women seeking white guys, although it's more natural in my view to go through one of the major non specific dating sites and simply message the women your interested in. Ethnicity is usually stated in the profile and generally there will be a picture. I would recommend only contacting people willing to put their picture up.

In my experience there's no difference chatting up a black or a white woman, so the same considerations apply. Be natural, and friendly, be tactile, let them know you fancy them, have a laugh if possible. Find out about them, their interests. You may want to talk about their roots but many black women in the UK are second, third, fourth generation or more and in the USA their roots may go back significantly further. You may not mean to condescend but avoid any suggestion you've assumed they're not British for example on the basis of colour. There is a risk of accidentally sounding insulting or insensitive and as a general rule it's good not to make assumptions about anyone, especially if you're flirting!

It is interesting however that in the USA many people are happy to identify themselves by their ancestry. It's not so unusual to hear someone say I'm German American or Italian American, but in the case of black families that have been in the country since the 1700s they may not know their exact roots so tread carefully. Many will of course consider themselves African American even if they don't know where exactly their roots lie, but these days many will know, either from research or because their families relocated more recently.

There really isn't a them and us scenario any more, if you think there is then don't try to foster a relationship with a black woman, you're not ready for it. Personally I find some black women attractive and some not, which is exactly the way I feel about white women there is no difference. Not that it matters if you only find black women attractive, that's fine, just don't regard them as a group apart they're really interested in the same things white girls are, they're educated, sexy and fun in most cases, so go out and meet black women and enjoy their company and talents.

Dating Black Women For White Men

2012-06-18T18:27:00.003-07:00

There are many white men who are attracted to and like to date black women. While it may not seem as common as other interracial parings, such as white men and Asian women, the preference still definitely exists.

Among white men who like to date black ladies, one of the primary concerns they have is "how do I attract them?" Without being to un-PC, "game" is typically different between black men and white men, and so the white guys may feel that they are at a disadvantage from the beginning. Fortunately for them, there are ways to entirely circumvent this!

Black women (and all women, for that matter), can be divided into two main groups: Those who are attracted to white guys, and those who aren't. If you are interested in dating black women, you want to focus on the former group for one very important reason: you can spend all day trying to attract a women who isn't attracted to you, and it won't be successful.

For this reason, you should primarily focus your attention on the black women who are attracted to white guys.

Once you have established this game plan, the next step is to focus on being your awesome self. Too many guys try to be the guy that they think women want, which is a recipe for disaster for many reasons, including the fact that you will have to fake that "other" personality for the duration of your relationship, which is tons of work and isn't much fun.

Remember, when you meet a woman who is attracted to while males, you can keep her attraction by being a white male. Don't try to act in some other way.

Interracial relationships are often the most fun and bonding, so by employing these tips, you may find yourself with a great life partner.

Click for more Black White Dating tips

Black White Dating isn’t destroying the Black community

2012-06-17T22:48:00.000-07:00

For some reason, some people feel black white dating will eventually wipe out the entire black community. And this kind of reasoning has been used by many parents and those people who don’t believe in race mixing to convince others against interracial dating. Most black women have been brought up believing the only man who could ever love her as she is supposed to be loved; the only man who can find her beautiful; the only man who can ever love her, can only be black. And these women have been brought up within a culture that requires them to stand by black men no matter what; even if it means forfeiting a good relationship with a white man and having a hurtful, abusive and unfulfilled one with a black man. Its all about maintaining the Black community values through avoidance of race mixing. But who said black white dating is wrecking the black community?

With most black men dating out, for some reason, the black women feel its their sole responsibility to hold together the Black community. And when they try black white dating, the community automatically calls them selfish or sellouts or hoes. And while she is sacrificing all her happiness for the Black community, all most Black men do is degrade and disrespect her, making her believe she is unworthy of love – even from non-black men. So why don’t people blame black men for destroying the Black community?

See, finding happiness should be everyone’s sole purpose. I don’t think any person should trade their happiness in the name of trying to maintain some certain societal structures. See, black white dating doesn’t destroy the black community. If anything, most Caucasians who marry into Black families tend to embrace their values and cultures. They are open enough to want to assimilate the Black culture into their own. And that is true maintenance of the Black values and culture – the spreading of the culture into the white community too.

My advice to Black women interested in black white dating: Follow your heart. Every black woman needs to realize that her options are wider and better. Every black woman needs to put her happiness first before the happiness of an entire community. Every black woman needs to realize that her appropriate man is defined by being responsible, loving and respectful to her – not by a skin color that matches her own.

So, go out there, explore your options and date whoever deserves your love.

Are White Girls Taken Advantage of?

2012-02-14T22:51:00.000-08:00

One of the biggest Stereotypes concerning white girl/black guy IR relationships is that the white girl is usually being used or manipulated by the black guy she is dating. Well from my experience being around many IR daters, I find this to be untrue. In fact, I would go as far as to say that the opposite has been true in most of the relationships Iv seen. Yes there are men out there that look to manipulate women with fragile self esteems and no sense of self worth, but this can happen to women of any color. As I stated, Iv seen more instances where the white girl is getting the better of the relationship as far as gifts,money, and other items. This can happen for a variety of reasons , but unfortunately one is that some black men feel white women or women of nationalities other than there own are the ultimate prize. Like rapper Kanye West jokingly said in his hit song Gold Digger,”After he get on he’ll leave yo ass for a white girl.” Even as the beneficiary of such men’s adoration, I find this mentality to be disturbing. I don’t want to be some guys trophy because of his own self hating issues. Who cares what he buys me!!!

Even though I find this stereotype to be untrue, I will say that black men seem to be more willing to lie about the nature of their relationship with women in general. For instance, maybe his friends are giving him a hard time about dating a white girl. He might feel the need to lie and say,”Well Im only with her because she pays for everything and lets me drive her car.” When in actuality he might be the one paying for most things and letting her drive his car. Even in the celebrity world, this stereotype doesn’t hold true. From Khloe/Lamar, Hank/Kendra, or Ice-T and Coco, it doesnt look like any of these white girls are getting used or taken advantage of. In fact I would say their celebrity black male significant other treats them very well. Of coarse we can never really know the true nature of their relationships, but outward appearances suggest that these celebrity black males treat their white girlfriends/wives very well. So what do you guys think about this stereotype, do you find it often to be true?

White Man Dating Black Woman – 3 Tips For Successful Interracial Dating

2011-09-04T22:35:00.000-07:00

OK, here it is – I have some real useful information for a white man dating black woman. I am not talking about just any old date with a black woman. I am talking about the most beautiful African American woman.

Right, my plan, for a white man dating black woman, is to lay out some simple techniques that will empower you with the skills to get the attention you deserve from the hottest black woman and really win in dating. These techniques will be broken down in three steps.

Here are the tips:

1) Stand Out From The Crowd: The first thing you need to do as a white man dating black woman is make sure you stand out. You see the issue is the hottest black women get a lot of looks. They know they are hot! So do not just be another wolf whistling clown!

So what do I mean? Well if you are shouting out to her and boring her with the predictable lines you are finished, period! So instead of the male ego, show her you are real man with a sincere heart. Approach her and just be a real white man dating black woman.

2) Tell Her What She Wants To Hear: Once you have shown that you are different, now you compliment her on how good she looks. She will be more receptive now that you have broken the initial barrier, are you with me?

Do not over do it though with the typical white man dating black woman zeal, just a few subtle compliments to make her feel stunning.

3) Tell Her You Will Be Taking Her Out: Now that you have passed the first few crucial tests for a white man dating black woman, you need to step up to the next level. You need to show here you can be confident and assertive. Instead of begging her for a date, tell her you will be taking her out next week.

What do I mean by that? Well, it is simple. Stunning black women have the pick of the bunch. This means that they are in high demand. With that comes hard work simply because they can afford to be picky and choose the best white man dating black woman prospect. Believe me if you had women chasing you on a daily basis, even you would get sick of it! Are you with me?

The only way to stand a remote chance of dating stunning Ebony women is to do something different from the rest. You need to make her feel that there is something unique about you. With that in mind, here is a bonus tip to help you achieve that:

Bonus Tip) Black Woman In Distress Technique:

This is a sneaky little trick that just works. It is a bit childish to be perfectly honest, but who cares! The main thing is that you want to get a sexy black woman and stand out from the crowd. Basically you get one of your friends to help you. He needs to approach a great looking African American woman on your behalf. However he is going to do everything wrong. What do I mean? Well he is going to act like a nerd and make life easier for you.

All you need to do is approach them and intervene. Tell him to get lost and ask the lady if she’s OK. Now you have won major points in her mind and you have not approached her like any other. You just have to relax and be yourself from now on, the hard work is all done.

Trust me she will love your confidence and leadership. All you need to do now as a white man dating black woman, is be yourself on the date because all the hard work has been done.

I Met My Match ONLINE

2011-08-31T23:08:00.000-07:00

A friend had told me about the InterracialFriends site, so last Aug/Sept, i thought why not put a profile up and see what happens. I had been on my own for most of the last 10years, and living in Australia thought it would be virtually impossible to find a perfect man..

thankfully he found me! Michael's membership was just about to expire and he saw my pic and thought he would send me a message even though i'm half way round the world. I had only been registered for about 2 weeks, and i really liked his profile and what he was about so i replied. We sent messages back and forth for a week, then started emailing each other. It was funny as one day he had asked me "do u have that accent?" so i replied, "give me your number and i will call u", and i did. We continued to talk on the phone just as friends. I had a vacation booked to the USA in October, but unfortunately was only going to LA and Vegas, and couldnt make it to Tenn where Michael lives. However when i was on my vacation a dear friend tragically passed away, and i was so upset and alone.

Michael said "well u could always come to Tenn", and i thought u know what, im gonna do it! So i jumped on a plane to Nashville and instantly we clicked and had the most awesome weekend. When i got home, we spoke on the phone every single day since October, and we started planning for our next visit. I booked another vacation on May 15, to meet his family, daughter and spend quality time with him. I just got home yesterday, and it was incredibly hard to leave him again, but it will only be temporary, as i have come back to Australia to make plans to relocate my children and i, as soon as i can afford to. We had the most perfect 3 weeks together and the absolute highlight was Sat May 30, we went to BB King Blues Club in Nashville (the place of our first date last year), for my birthday. Michael surprised me with a stretch hummer, and then on our way he proposed! We are planning on a simple wedding, as we have both been married before, as soon as i move to USA. He is the most wonderful, sweet man, and i feel so blessed that he sent that first message. As corny as it sounds, I know we really are 'soulmates'. Thankyou to the InterracialFriends service, as without it, we would never have had the chance to meet. Nicole

Advice to other members:

take a risk ... just send a message to someone, u have nothing to lose ... but everything to gain

Dating a Black Man; Should You Pursue It?

2011-08-17T20:08:00.000-07:00

Remember when Mom would have died if you were dating a black man and brought him home for dinner to meet the family? Interracial dating was completely unheard of. White women didn't date black men. If they did, they certainly kept it to themselves.

Fortunately, dating a black man is a big deal anymore. There is hope for women who cannot help their affections leaning more in that direction.

Since the 50s and the Civil Rights Era, we have become more attuned to interracial dating as a society. Dating a black man is not as dramatic as it was.

Chances are you can get mom and dad to be okay with your choices in dating a black man. They may not necessarily agree with it.

These days, people clearly see the value that the differences in culture and personality bring to a relationship rather than the drawbacks attributed to the associated differences. Of course, when you date anyone of any different culture than yours, dating black man, white man, or Asian man, you stand the chance of nasty or ignorant small talk and gossip that can ruin the atmosphere.

Unfortunately, there is nothing that you can do about it; these are the actions of other people you can control. Face the truth that you guys might be the topic of a few conversations. The sooner you both realize it, the better off you will be if you pursue a relationship.

The hardest part of dating a black man might have something to do with the relatives.

Friends are one thing, but family is a whole other story altogether. It is the difficult part of interracial dating.

Both of you need to face the facts and realize that you are either going to be upfront about your relationship. By dating a black man, when you suspected they might not approve, you are accepting the fact that your family may not agree with your choice.

What you can do is explain the situation to them as respectfully as you can. As an adult, whether or not you want to date a black man, blue man or green man is entirely up to you.

Your parents will not agree with many of the decisions you make. Your siblings or even your own children might not agree, either.

You need to stand your ground, be a woman, and go after your own happiness. If it is meant to be, the rest will fall into place.

Good does come from dating sites - InterracialFriends.com

2011-08-17T19:05:00.000-07:00

Randall, sent me a smile/wink around the third week of November 22, 2009, we corresponded through several emails for four days, we exchanged telephone numbers and spoke on a Sunday afternoon, November 27-28 for several hours. At the time I lived in Nashville and he lives in Knoxville. About three weeks after talking and sending emails, he came up to Nashville to meet me, that was December 16,-17th 2009.

I knew he was OK because Shadow, my dog, did not bark and growl, he just woofed a time or too.Shadow was jealous because Shadow swatted him on his leg with his paw and he picked up a pillow and shook it it like a rag doll, which we still talk and laugh about.Shadow has since died.

He stayed at my house, against the advisement of my friends, but in my heart ,I knew he was not a bad person, he didn't make any moves to become intimate on our initial visit, THAT'S when I knew he has morals.

I have attached a picture of both of us, as mentioned in a previous email, we are still dating and I'm patiently waiting on him to give me a bling- bling..lol

We are both no longer members of this dating site, however with all the negatives you hear about dating sites, in this occasion, I believe that good does come from dating sites. Thanks to InterracialFriends.com!

Advice to other members:

We are both no longer members of this dating site, however with all the negatives you hear about dating sites, in this occasion, I believe that good does come from dating sites.

IRF has helped me to meet some nice BLACK men!

2011-08-16T20:40:00.000-07:00

I still have not met this person, but we have been corresponding for about 2 1/2 months, 3 weeks emailing each other and 5 weeks talking on the phone and we have become good friends. We are finally going to meet each on Sat. June 12th. We are both very excited and we both know this relationship has a future. We have talked about marriage and what are thoughts and feelings are, but we have not talked about us getting married...not yet! I don't know if it's possible to have strong feelings for someone you have not yet met, but we do have feelings for each other and their is a strong knowing inside for both of us that we need and want to be together.

I'm so very happy!!!! I will let IRF know the outcomes!!!

Thank-You for this Website, it has helped me to meet some nice men, but this guy IS MY GUY!!!! Thanks once again!!!

Heather Chijiinweh :)

View more interracial love stories on InterracialFriends.com

About Succeeding in an Interracial Relationship

2011-08-16T20:37:00.000-07:00

Bridging the gap between races and giving them a place wherein they can start to understand each other much better is one of the many benefits that the internet was able to provide us. The results of this can be seen all over the world today and that is through the many individuals who are having an interracial relationship. Some of the most common examples of this type of relationship would be Asians and Americans, as well as black and white Americans. In a way, people from all over the world today no longer see race or ethnicity as a barrier for forging genuine relationships. Now this is really a good thing because we now have a way to show the world that people can truly understand each other and that we can forge a much better future through this.

Now if you are someone who is really interested in finding your very own interracial relationship then you would need to prepare yourself for the many challenges that are ahead of you. There are a lot of factors that you would need to deal with so that you can attain the success that you desire with such a venture. Of course there are ways for you to prepare yourself and being mindful of them can significantly help you out and pretty much make things easier on you as well. Here are the things that you need to consider if you would want to attain success in an interracial relationship.

Respecting culture and traditions is one of the very first things that you need to learn how to do. This is really vital if you would want to understand your partner and ultimately be a part of their world. Of course this goes both ways and that is why it is very important that both of you are able to keep an open mind on the differences that you may have in this matter. Now there is really no need to rush in this because you may easily get shocked on things especially if there is really a huge gap between you and your partner when it comes to culture. The best way to deal with this is to slowly introduce each other on your respective worlds. You would not only be able to understand and take in the different cultures that you both have, but appreciate them much better.

Another way for couples who are having an interracial relationship to understand each other much better would be to make full use of their common interests. These interests that you share should be treated as a common ground wherein both of you would be able to understand each other clearly and start to build the foundations that you need for your relationship. Once both of you have a full grasp of the interests that you share, you can then work up to the differences that you have in this matter. It would surely open up more opportunities for the both of you to maximize your getting to know each other phase and at the same time, build more appreciation towards each other as well.

Interracial Dating Blog - black and white singles looking for interracial relationships!: Interracial Dating Tips - A Personal Experience

2011-08-16T20:28:00.000-07:00

Interracial Dating Blog - black and white singles looking for interracial relationships!: Interracial Dating Tips - A Personal Experience

Interracial Dating Tips - A Personal Experience

2011-08-16T20:23:00.000-07:00

Is Interracial Dating For You?

Are you considering interracial dating? Well, before you do, you should consider your motives. I've dated inter-racially since 1989; and it has been no more different than when I dated Black men. I wasn't seeking a White man just to have a "pretty baby," which is what most outsiders think. I dated inter-racially because I have always been attracted to White men; but wasn't allowed to earlier due to family pressure. Needless to say, I have grown to accept the consequences of my decisions; and I've not looked back sense.

It hasn't always been easy. I've been rejected by my former boyfriends' family and friends; but I wasn't dating them. Nonetheless, it didn't make our relationship stronger because "he" couldn't handle the pressure. With that said, ask yourself this question: "When the going gets tough, will I stay the course?" Your answer will determine whether inter-racially dating is for you. It isn't an easy road to travel; but if you choose to do so, it is well worth the trip.

So, stay tuned to this blog as it will provide you with some interesting stories of my interracial dating experiences. You are not alone; and it's always a excellent trip when you can take a friend along for the ride - ME!

Please share your comments on this subject as I'm sure there are others out there like me who can handle interracial dating joys and challenges.

Interracial Dating tips (InterracialFriends.com)

2011-08-16T19:57:00.000-07:00

For two people in love, it is an established fact that feelings are not racist. It does not matter whether the person whom you want to see in your arms is a Hispanic, Asian, Black or White. The only thing important is the sincerity and honesty in this relationship.

For these people I would like to categorically declare that your soul mate is first a woman or a man. Afterwards the creed and cast differences arise, so please see the scenario from this point of view and you will be able to get along without much hustle bustle. Still keeping in mind some basic points might help us in finding the right combination of feelings and expression for someone with another race or culture.

Simplest and most effective tip:

Ask your partner out. For those of you who think that this works only for partners of their own cultural background, well you are two hundred percent ………incorrect. Simple act of asking out means showing how much you care for your partner and how much importance is there in your heart for him or her. It also is a proof of sacrifice and daring qualities which every man or woman wants to see in his or her partner. However making the move at the right time and with right choice is of paramount importance
Remove racism from your thoughts

Once you get over with the differences of race, your partner will have absolutely no problem doing so. Trust me, if you want someone to feel something you can do it very easily. Simple loose talk involving some particular discussion about races and cultural differences is all you need to ruin the party. So stop going back to differences and find the similarities.
Be the person with the right intellectual level

People with more often than not meet people of similar or higher mental caliber and like them. Even if there are other differences involved, a superior mental and emotional caliber is what is going to attract others. You do not need to do this just to get your soul mate interested. In fact this is something that you should do to groom up yourself. The differences between other people’s approach and their increased acceptance level are going to be the testimony to my suggestion.

Be honest

What matters for any long term relationship is the sincerity and honesty of its involved partners. No matter how charming your partner is or how beautiful you think that he or she is, in a long term scenario these things are bound to become lesser important. The differences in opinion may have a shade on your thinking about your spouse but if honesty prevails then there is nothing better than that.

Interracial Dating Attitudes Among College Students

2011-08-15T23:40:00.000-07:00

Six-hundred-twenty university students completed an anonymous confidential questionnaire designed to assess attitudes toward interracial dating. Almost one fourth (24.2%) reported having dated interracially and almost half (49.6%) expressed an openness to become involved in an interracial relationship. Blacks, cohabitants, and those with previous interracial dating experience were significantly more likely to express an openness to become involved in an interracial relationship. Implications for university faculty, therapists, and students are suggested.

Although the marriages of Quincy Jones (musician), Charles Barkley (professional basketball player) and Roger Ebert (film critic) are interracial, less than 5% of all marriages in the United States are interracial (Statistical Abstract of the United States: 1998). This relatively low percentage of interracial marriages has been stable for decades. However, increased individualism, tolerance for diversity, and greater minority enrollment in colleges and universities may result in more approving attitudes of college students toward interracial relationships. This study focused on attitudes and behaviors of college students regarding interracial relationships.

Data
The data consisted of 620 never married undergraduates from five first year level sociology courses at East Carolina University who voluntarily completed an anonymous questionnaire designed to assess the respondent's openness to become involved in an interracial relationship. Among the respondents, 63% were women; 37% were men. Eighty-percent were first year students and sophomores; twenty percent were juniors and seniors. The median age was 19. Respondents were predominately white (87%) and African-American (8.5%) with 1% Hispanic and 3.6% "other". About half (51.7%) were casually dating while the other half (48.3%) were involved in a reciprocal love relationship. Ten months was the median number of months respondents reported dating their current partner.

Items 17 and 18 on the 24 item questionnaire were "I am open to involvement in an interracial relationship" and "I have dated someone of another race." Respondents were asked to respond on a continuum- Strongly Agree, Agree, Disagree, Strongly Disagree. The category Neither Agree nor Disagree was also an option. Responses to Strongly Agree and Agree were combined as were responses to Strongly Disagree and Disagree. Individuals who circled Neither Agree nor Disagree were eliminated from the analysis. Five-hundred and twenty-two respondents acknowledged an agree or disagree position on being open to interracial dating. Five-hundred and eighty-three respondents reported that they had or had not dated interracially.

Findings and Discussion

Almost half (49.6%) of the respondents reported that they were open to involvement in an interracial relationship. Almost a quarter (24.2%) said that they had dated someone of another race. While there were no significant differences in sex (women vs men) or university rank (freshman, sophomore, junior, senior) between those who were open to interracial involvements and those who were not, there were significant differences in regard to race, cohabitation experience, previous interracial dating experience and openness to cohabit.

1. Race. Blacks were twice as likely as whites (83% vs 43%) to report that they were open to involvement in an interracial relationship. This finding was significant (p [is less than] .0000) suggesting that this difference would occur by chance less than one time in one hundred thousand. Previous researchers have documented the greater acceptance of blacks versus whites for interracial relationships (Rosenblatt et al., 1995). Explanations include more benefits from blacks joining the majority than vise versa, the greater number of whites available to blacks than vise versa, and the greater exposure of blacks to the white culture than vise versa. Finally, black mothers and white fathers have different roles in the respective black and white communities in terms of setting the norms of interracial relationships.

In many black families, mothers play the key role in accepting or not accepting an interracial relationship, much more than in white families. In white families, fathers were more often major players, as were siblings, grandparents, and other kin..."If women respond more often with openness and efforts to relate and less often with prejudice to the relationship choices of sons and daughters, then the fact that the crucial person in black families is most often a woman means there may be more acceptance of a family member's entry into an interracial couple" (Rosenblatt et al., 1995, 118).

2. Cohabitation Experience. Sixty percent of the college students in this sample who had lived together expressed an openness to become involved in an interracial relationship. Forty-seven percent of those who had not lived together expressed a similar willingness. This difference in cohabitants versus non-cohabitants over willingness to date interracially was statistically significant (p [is less than] .05). Both cohabitation and dating interracially are non normative behaviors. It is not surprising that students that elect to engage in non mainstream behavior in one area express this tendency in other areas.

3. Interracial Dating Experience. Ninety-two percent of the respondents who reported having dated interracially were open to doing so again. Only 32% of those who had not dated interracially were open to interracial involvement. This finding was statistically significant (p [is less than] .0000). The finding that exposure encourages acceptance is not unusual. Similar phenomenon in regard to racial attitudes has been documented (Hallinan and Teizeira, 1987; Homans, 1950; Slavin, 1979).

Summary and Implications

Almost half of the college students in this sample were open to involvement in a relationship with someone of another race. Almost a quarter had done so. Such openness to interracial dating is characteristic of both women and men and students of all academic ranks. Persons who are black, experienced in living together, and who have dated interracially are particularly approving of interracial involvement.

This study provides information for university students, faculty, and counselors about interracial dating as a part of the college experience. Racial barriers are, indeed, coming down as students test for themselves interracial relationships. Unique issues/benefits/problems related to these relationships await new research.

What’s So great about Black love? : Interracial Dating in America

2011-08-04T18:00:00.000-07:00

When I was 5 years old at PS 249 in brooklyn, New York, there was a little boy at my school named Anthony. He was cute and I liked him. He was my very first “boyfriend”. He broke up with me only a day after we started going steady because this little boy named Cory told him that I had cooties. When I was 12 years old I have a crush on this boy named Anthony ( hmm.. may its just the name I’m attracted too).

It never went anywhere because when I was 12, I was a dog. ( It was my awkward stage in life. One boob was bigger than the other. I didn’t know what to do with my hair and I had zero fashion sense) When I was 15 I started dating a guy named Michael. He was my first real boyfriend. I presented you with my early dating history because it is relevant to my point.

These boys/ men were not black. Not one. I HAVE dated black men since Michael and I broke up but I’ve also dated Asians and Latinos and more White guys. I DO NOT feel obligated to date black men because I don’t feel like I owe them anything. I’m not a black man basher. I believe that there are many black men who are worth it. I believe that they are intelligent and they have potential beyond belief. I believe that they can bring just as much to the table as any other “race”. But I do not feel like I have to only date black men to prove this point.

I was dating a man named T and he never believed that I would marry a black guy. He often said that I was white. When we finally did break up ( because I got tired of being ignored by someone who claimed they wanted to marry me) He made a snarky comment about just how long I was waiting to do it and how he hoped I was happy with my white boys. I also have a friend that theorizes that I date other races because I want my children to have a certain look.

I have another black male friend that believes I date interracially because I have been hurt by too many black men and i’m just bitter. ( The reality is.. I date guys whose personality traits don’t really mesh with mine. Two agressive people can’t be in a relationship together. Someone is going to feel as if they are suffocating and that someone is usually me.)

So lets talk statistics. Several studies have found that Black men are more likely to DATE interracially than any other group of men. It also found that Asian women were more likely to date interracially than any groups of women. Black women and Asian Men are the least likely to to be desired for interracial relationships. ( Maybe black women and Asian men should get together.. I promise the stereotypes aren’t true) ;-)

So I’m asking: if Black men, in general, do not feel obligated to commit to a black woman why should women? We are always talking about how black love is beautiful and expect that women stick to that line while men don’t have to. This is a terrible double standard. I say that people should date who ever makes them happy. However, I find it problematic when people date outside their race because they believe that there is lack within it.

I date outside my race because I believe that I can not limit my options if I want to find the best person for me. I date black men and white men and Asian men and Latinos and Ameri-Indian men and Multiracial men. I date who ever i am compatible with. Because after all its compatibility, SES and communication that determine the success or failure of a relationship.If you like dating black people then cool. If you like dating White people then cool. I do not believe that anyone has the right to criticize those who date interracially.

The final point I’d like to make has to do with the quote from the video. If you genuinely believe that black women who date interracially do it because they think “Black men aint S***” then maybe you should examine your self and ask why this is your thinking. Sometimes we project our feelings onto others so that we can make ourselves feel better about certain situations. If you feel as if you are lacking then do things to better yourself. ( Just a side note… Black men and women OVERWHELMINGLY choose each other.. so this whole blog could potentially be moot)

5-Fascinating-Interracial-Marriages-in-History

2011-08-03T18:09:00.000-07:00

Attitudes towards Interracial marriage have changed dramatically, in just the last generation. In the United States it was just 43 years ago when interracial marriage was made fully legal in all 50 states. Today, in many countries, interracial marriage is commonplace and most don’t even give it a second thought. However, as we all know, it wasn’t always this way in the past. This list includes individuals who didn’t let the prejudice of society make their decisions in life, and also paved the way for interracial couples in the future.

Note: Interracial marriage can convey a relationship between a Black and an Asian, a White and an Asian, a Hispanic and an Asian, a White and a Hispanic, etc. In this particular list I have included only black and white relationships.

5 Jack Johnson and Wives (Married in 1911,1912 & 1925)

Interesting Fact: At Johnson’s funeral, Johnson’s third wife Irene Pineau was asked by a reporter what she had loved about her husband. “I loved him because of his courage, he faced the world unafraid. There wasn’t anybody or anything he feared.” The photo above shows Johnson with his first wife, Etta Terry Duryea. Jack Johnson had no children.

4 Frederick Douglass and Helen Pitts (Married in 1884)

Interesting Fact: During Fredrick Douglass’s first marriage he had a 26 year affair with German feminist Ottilie Assing. In 1884, when she read in the newspapers that Douglass was to marry Helen Pitts, who was 20 years-younger, she committed suicide in a public park in Paris. The letters Douglass wrote to her were burned, and she left all her money to Douglass.

3 Joseph Philippe Laroche and Juliette Lafargue (Married in 1908)

Interesting fact: When Juliette returned to Paris with her daughters she gave birth to a son, Joseph Lemercier Laroche. The White Star Line, the company that owned the Titanic, was later forced to issue a public apology for the derogatory statements made by the crew. When Louise Laroche died on January 28, 1998, at the age of 87 it left only seven remaining survivors of the Titanic.

2 Sir Seretse Khama and Ruth Williams (Married in 1948)

Interesting Fact: Botswana was among the world’s poorest countries but during Seretse Khama’s tenure as president, Botswana had the fastest growing economy in the world. Khama instituted strong measures against corruption and reinvested money into infrastructure, health and education. In 2009, Seretse and Ruth’s fist son, Ian, won a landslide victory and became the fourth President of Botswana. Their younger son, Tshekedi , was elected as a parliamentarian.

1 Barack Obama, Sr. and Ann Dunham (Married in 1961)

Interesting Fact: Following Ann Dunham’s memorial service at the University of Hawaii, Obama and his half sister Maya spread their mother’s ashes in the Pacific Ocean at Lanai Lookout on the south side of Oahu. Obama scattered the ashes of his grandmother (Madelyn Dunham) who died November 2, 2008, in the same spot weeks after his election to the presidency.

Starting your interracial love from InterracialFriends.com - the best interracial dating site.

Tamera Mowry Wants Women To Consider Interracial Dating

2011-08-02T19:57:00.000-07:00

Tamera Mowry walked down the aisle for the first time this past May when she married her longtime boyfriend, Fox News Correspondent, Adam Housley. Tamera was the beaming bride with her twin sister Tia by her side as they celebrated her big day. Tamera sat down with Essence magazine to discuss her married life, being a good wife and the persistent question about her interracial marriage.

On the interracial question:

Well, I always find these questions so interesting, because I’m a product of an interracial marriage — and I never really grew up seeing color. I honestly realized that my dad was White when someone told me in middle school. They’re like, “Oh your dad’s White?” I’m like, “Oh, my gosh, he really is White.” I knew what race was, but it didn’t matter to me. Yes we are an interracial couple. The thing is we do still deal with that. People always question that. If anything, it hurts, but we do have more people supporting us then making stupid comments. We kind of just ignore it and focus on the positive. Love is love and a lot of times people might be in the situation they’re in because they put barriers up. Like some people only want to date a model, or an actor, or an athlete. You’re only limiting yourself. Open up to what’s out there because God made us all.

I recommend single women to try this professional interracial web: InterracialFriends.com.

McCoy's 3 Things To Know When Dating A White Man

2010-06-13T00:08:00.000-07:00

3 Things To Know When Dating A White Man Von-Anise McCoy

1. A bad hair day means nothing to him: People from thesame background can be harder on each other, because theyfeel a sense on camaraderie. Men from another racial background, especially white men, seem to be more accepting of a bad hair day. However, on the other hand, black men will be more forgiving if you happen to gain a little weight. The money that you save on the weekly trips to the salon will just have to be re-purposed for a trainer because slim and trim is the desired look.

2. Be prepared for the dirty looks: The same way some black girls see a black man with a white girl and give the couple a dirty look, white woman feel the same way when they see a white man with a woman of another race. I was shocked, when a white friend of mine told me that all of the good white guys were being taken by the Asian girls. If you’re going to be in an inter-racial relationship– do not take the reactions of strangers personal. A thick skin is mandatory–this is your man and you need to hold your head up high and ignore all negativity.

3. Just in case you were thinking it: Penis size is not an issue: I know that there is the myth of the big, black penis but that is an urban legend. A small penis can exist with a black man or a white one. The problem could be that your new white boyfriend might believe that rumor and feel a bit insecure–which can really work in your favor when it comes to foreplay, ifyou know what I mean! Just use reassuring lines like “Give me that big…” (you fill in the rest) while making love, to restore his wondering mind and sooth his ego.

PositiveSingleMatch.com offers dating and friendship options for all kinds of people, such as straight, gay, bisexual, and interracial dating

Is it wrong to refuse interracial dating?

2010-02-03T21:56:00.000-08:00

Over at The Root, Helena Andrews (who is black) writes about why she doesn't date white guys. The piece is entertaining, but good luck trying to find an actual argument in it. It did make me wonder, though, if it should even be necessary to make an argument about something as personal as that sort of preference. Personally, it doesn't bother me if Helena Andrews only wants to date black guys ... or if she only wants to date Hispanic men. Why should she, or anybody, have to justify that sort of thing? Do people really employ rational faculties when deciding on romantic partners? Should they have to?

In general, no -- but there are exceptions. Before I met my wife, I used to hang out with a Jewish friend, and I was quite attracted to her. I think she felt the same way about me. But we never explored that, and that was because of me. I was a religiously observant Catholic; she was a non-religious Jew. My faith was too important to me to make for a happy marriage -- and I strongly believe you shouldn't date someone you couldn't see marrying in time.
Similarly, I completely understand the view among some Jews that Jews should only marry other Jews, not only for religious reasons, but because the intermarriage rate is so high that a distinctive Jewish culture (and religion) is in danger of being assimilated. There's a lot of wisdom in prohibitions among religious communities -- Jewish, Christian, Muslim, etc. -- against marrying outside the faith.

Ethnically speaking, I always dated Caucasian girls, not because I ruled out dating outside my race, but that's just how things went. For me, as an adult, religious compatibility was the most important factor in dating, at least as important as personal chemistry. But culture is also enormously important. I would have chosen to date a middle-class educated black girl who liked the same kinds of things as I did over a working-class white girl who hadn't gone to college, and who had different interests. It's not that one is morally better than the other, but only that chances are the black woman and I are going to have more in common than the white girl and I will. On the other hand, a couple of the unrequited crushes I had back in college and right out of college were on northern European women. Had we married, I wonder how our different cultural backgrounds would have affected our relationship? My wife and I come from neighboring states, but she had a different childhood growing up in the Dallas suburbs than I had growing up in rural south Louisiana. It's hard enough explaining my homeland and its native culture to a woman from suburban Dallas, much less from, say, downtown Stockholm. (And, for my putative Euro-bride, vice versa).

All of which is to say that if Helena Andrews only wants to date black guys, that's fine with me. I don't think it's right to expect her to justify her choice, at least not on ethnic terms. Nor do I think it's right to ask a white woman who doesn't want to date black guys to justify her choice. The heart wants what it wants. But if one doesn't want to date partners of another race on grounds of principle as opposed to instinctive preference (e.g., "I don't date white guys because I think it's wrong" versus "I don't know why, but I just don't find white guys attractive"), I think one ought to at least question oneself and one's motives.