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2011-11-03T01:21:32-07:00

INTERRACIAL DATING - Our website provides interracial dating services for Black and White, Asian and Latino singles open to interracial relationships. Click here for extensive Interracial Dating Videos.

White Man Dating Black Woman – 3 Tips For Successful Interracial Dating

2011-09-04T22:35:00.000-07:00

OK, here it is – I have some real useful information for a white man dating black woman. I am not talking about just any old date with a black woman. I am talking about the most beautiful African American woman.

Right, my plan, for a white man dating black woman, is to lay out some simple techniques that will empower you with the skills to get the attention you deserve from the hottest black woman and really win in dating. These techniques will be broken down in three steps.

Here are the tips:

1) Stand Out From The Crowd: The first thing you need to do as a white man dating black woman is make sure you stand out. You see the issue is the hottest black women get a lot of looks. They know they are hot! So do not just be another wolf whistling clown!

So what do I mean? Well if you are shouting out to her and boring her with the predictable lines you are finished, period! So instead of the male ego, show her you are real man with a sincere heart. Approach her and just be a real white man dating black woman.

2) Tell Her What She Wants To Hear: Once you have shown that you are different, now you compliment her on how good she looks. She will be more receptive now that you have broken the initial barrier, are you with me?

Do not over do it though with the typical white man dating black woman zeal, just a few subtle compliments to make her feel stunning.

3) Tell Her You Will Be Taking Her Out: Now that you have passed the first few crucial tests for a white man dating black woman, you need to step up to the next level. You need to show here you can be confident and assertive. Instead of begging her for a date, tell her you will be taking her out next week.

What do I mean by that? Well, it is simple. Stunning black women have the pick of the bunch. This means that they are in high demand. With that comes hard work simply because they can afford to be picky and choose the best white man dating black woman prospect. Believe me if you had women chasing you on a daily basis, even you would get sick of it! Are you with me?

The only way to stand a remote chance of dating stunning Ebony women is to do something different from the rest. You need to make her feel that there is something unique about you. With that in mind, here is a bonus tip to help you achieve that:

Bonus Tip) Black Woman In Distress Technique:

This is a sneaky little trick that just works. It is a bit childish to be perfectly honest, but who cares! The main thing is that you want to get a sexy black woman and stand out from the crowd. Basically you get one of your friends to help you. He needs to approach a great looking African American woman on your behalf. However he is going to do everything wrong. What do I mean? Well he is going to act like a nerd and make life easier for you.

All you need to do is approach them and intervene. Tell him to get lost and ask the lady if she’s OK. Now you have won major points in her mind and you have not approached her like any other. You just have to relax and be yourself from now on, the hard work is all done.

Trust me she will love your confidence and leadership. All you need to do now as a white man dating black woman, is be yourself on the date because all the hard work has been done.

I Met My Match ONLINE

2011-08-31T23:08:00.000-07:00

A friend had told me about the InterracialFriends site, so last Aug/Sept, i thought why not put a profile up and see what happens. I had been on my own for most of the last 10years, and living in Australia thought it would be virtually impossible to find a perfect man..

thankfully he found me! Michael's membership was just about to expire and he saw my pic and thought he would send me a message even though i'm half way round the world. I had only been registered for about 2 weeks, and i really liked his profile and what he was about so i replied. We sent messages back and forth for a week, then started emailing each other. It was funny as one day he had asked me "do u have that accent?" so i replied, "give me your number and i will call u", and i did. We continued to talk on the phone just as friends. I had a vacation booked to the USA in October, but unfortunately was only going to LA and Vegas, and couldnt make it to Tenn where Michael lives. However when i was on my vacation a dear friend tragically passed away, and i was so upset and alone.

Michael said "well u could always come to Tenn", and i thought u know what, im gonna do it! So i jumped on a plane to Nashville and instantly we clicked and had the most awesome weekend. When i got home, we spoke on the phone every single day since October, and we started planning for our next visit. I booked another vacation on May 15, to meet his family, daughter and spend quality time with him. I just got home yesterday, and it was incredibly hard to leave him again, but it will only be temporary, as i have come back to Australia to make plans to relocate my children and i, as soon as i can afford to. We had the most perfect 3 weeks together and the absolute highlight was Sat May 30, we went to BB King Blues Club in Nashville (the place of our first date last year), for my birthday. Michael surprised me with a stretch hummer, and then on our way he proposed! We are planning on a simple wedding, as we have both been married before, as soon as i move to USA. He is the most wonderful, sweet man, and i feel so blessed that he sent that first message. As corny as it sounds, I know we really are 'soulmates'. Thankyou to the InterracialFriends service, as without it, we would never have had the chance to meet. Nicole

Advice to other members:

take a risk ... just send a message to someone, u have nothing to lose ... but everything to gain

Dating a Black Man; Should You Pursue It?

2011-08-17T20:08:00.000-07:00

Remember when Mom would have died if you were dating a black man and brought him home for dinner to meet the family? Interracial dating was completely unheard of. White women didn't date black men. If they did, they certainly kept it to themselves.

Fortunately, dating a black man is a big deal anymore. There is hope for women who cannot help their affections leaning more in that direction.

Since the 50s and the Civil Rights Era, we have become more attuned to interracial dating as a society. Dating a black man is not as dramatic as it was.

Chances are you can get mom and dad to be okay with your choices in dating a black man. They may not necessarily agree with it.

These days, people clearly see the value that the differences in culture and personality bring to a relationship rather than the drawbacks attributed to the associated differences. Of course, when you date anyone of any different culture than yours, dating black man, white man, or Asian man, you stand the chance of nasty or ignorant small talk and gossip that can ruin the atmosphere.

Unfortunately, there is nothing that you can do about it; these are the actions of other people you can control. Face the truth that you guys might be the topic of a few conversations. The sooner you both realize it, the better off you will be if you pursue a relationship.

The hardest part of dating a black man might have something to do with the relatives.

Friends are one thing, but family is a whole other story altogether. It is the difficult part of interracial dating.

Both of you need to face the facts and realize that you are either going to be upfront about your relationship. By dating a black man, when you suspected they might not approve, you are accepting the fact that your family may not agree with your choice.

What you can do is explain the situation to them as respectfully as you can. As an adult, whether or not you want to date a black man, blue man or green man is entirely up to you.

Your parents will not agree with many of the decisions you make. Your siblings or even your own children might not agree, either.

You need to stand your ground, be a woman, and go after your own happiness. If it is meant to be, the rest will fall into place.

Good does come from dating sites - InterracialFriends.com

2011-08-17T19:05:00.000-07:00

Randall, sent me a smile/wink around the third week of November 22, 2009, we corresponded through several emails for four days, we exchanged telephone numbers and spoke on a Sunday afternoon, November 27-28 for several hours. At the time I lived in Nashville and he lives in Knoxville. About three weeks after talking and sending emails, he came up to Nashville to meet me, that was December 16,-17th 2009.

I knew he was OK because Shadow, my dog, did not bark and growl, he just woofed a time or too.Shadow was jealous because Shadow swatted him on his leg with his paw and he picked up a pillow and shook it it like a rag doll, which we still talk and laugh about.Shadow has since died.

He stayed at my house, against the advisement of my friends, but in my heart ,I knew he was not a bad person, he didn't make any moves to become intimate on our initial visit, THAT'S when I knew he has morals.

I have attached a picture of both of us, as mentioned in a previous email, we are still dating and I'm patiently waiting on him to give me a bling- bling..lol

We are both no longer members of this dating site, however with all the negatives you hear about dating sites, in this occasion, I believe that good does come from dating sites. Thanks to InterracialFriends.com!

Advice to other members:

We are both no longer members of this dating site, however with all the negatives you hear about dating sites, in this occasion, I believe that good does come from dating sites.

IRF has helped me to meet some nice BLACK men!

2011-08-16T20:40:00.000-07:00

I still have not met this person, but we have been corresponding for about 2 1/2 months, 3 weeks emailing each other and 5 weeks talking on the phone and we have become good friends. We are finally going to meet each on Sat. June 12th. We are both very excited and we both know this relationship has a future. We have talked about marriage and what are thoughts and feelings are, but we have not talked about us getting married...not yet! I don't know if it's possible to have strong feelings for someone you have not yet met, but we do have feelings for each other and their is a strong knowing inside for both of us that we need and want to be together.

I'm so very happy!!!! I will let IRF know the outcomes!!!

Thank-You for this Website, it has helped me to meet some nice men, but this guy IS MY GUY!!!! Thanks once again!!!

Heather Chijiinweh :)

View more interracial love stories on InterracialFriends.com

About Succeeding in an Interracial Relationship

2011-08-16T20:37:00.000-07:00

Bridging the gap between races and giving them a place wherein they can start to understand each other much better is one of the many benefits that the internet was able to provide us. The results of this can be seen all over the world today and that is through the many individuals who are having an interracial relationship. Some of the most common examples of this type of relationship would be Asians and Americans, as well as black and white Americans. In a way, people from all over the world today no longer see race or ethnicity as a barrier for forging genuine relationships. Now this is really a good thing because we now have a way to show the world that people can truly understand each other and that we can forge a much better future through this.

Now if you are someone who is really interested in finding your very own interracial relationship then you would need to prepare yourself for the many challenges that are ahead of you. There are a lot of factors that you would need to deal with so that you can attain the success that you desire with such a venture. Of course there are ways for you to prepare yourself and being mindful of them can significantly help you out and pretty much make things easier on you as well. Here are the things that you need to consider if you would want to attain success in an interracial relationship.

Respecting culture and traditions is one of the very first things that you need to learn how to do. This is really vital if you would want to understand your partner and ultimately be a part of their world. Of course this goes both ways and that is why it is very important that both of you are able to keep an open mind on the differences that you may have in this matter. Now there is really no need to rush in this because you may easily get shocked on things especially if there is really a huge gap between you and your partner when it comes to culture. The best way to deal with this is to slowly introduce each other on your respective worlds. You would not only be able to understand and take in the different cultures that you both have, but appreciate them much better.

Another way for couples who are having an interracial relationship to understand each other much better would be to make full use of their common interests. These interests that you share should be treated as a common ground wherein both of you would be able to understand each other clearly and start to build the foundations that you need for your relationship. Once both of you have a full grasp of the interests that you share, you can then work up to the differences that you have in this matter. It would surely open up more opportunities for the both of you to maximize your getting to know each other phase and at the same time, build more appreciation towards each other as well.

Interracial Dating Blog - black and white singles looking for interracial relationships!: Interracial Dating Tips - A Personal Experience

2011-08-16T20:28:00.000-07:00

Interracial Dating Blog - black and white singles looking for interracial relationships!: Interracial Dating Tips - A Personal Experience

Interracial Dating Tips - A Personal Experience

2011-08-16T20:23:00.000-07:00

Is Interracial Dating For You?

Are you considering interracial dating? Well, before you do, you should consider your motives. I've dated inter-racially since 1989; and it has been no more different than when I dated Black men. I wasn't seeking a White man just to have a "pretty baby," which is what most outsiders think. I dated inter-racially because I have always been attracted to White men; but wasn't allowed to earlier due to family pressure. Needless to say, I have grown to accept the consequences of my decisions; and I've not looked back sense.

It hasn't always been easy. I've been rejected by my former boyfriends' family and friends; but I wasn't dating them. Nonetheless, it didn't make our relationship stronger because "he" couldn't handle the pressure. With that said, ask yourself this question: "When the going gets tough, will I stay the course?" Your answer will determine whether inter-racially dating is for you. It isn't an easy road to travel; but if you choose to do so, it is well worth the trip.

So, stay tuned to this blog as it will provide you with some interesting stories of my interracial dating experiences. You are not alone; and it's always a excellent trip when you can take a friend along for the ride - ME!

Please share your comments on this subject as I'm sure there are others out there like me who can handle interracial dating joys and challenges.

Interracial Dating tips (InterracialFriends.com)

2011-08-16T19:57:00.000-07:00

For two people in love, it is an established fact that feelings are not racist. It does not matter whether the person whom you want to see in your arms is a Hispanic, Asian, Black or White. The only thing important is the sincerity and honesty in this relationship.

For these people I would like to categorically declare that your soul mate is first a woman or a man. Afterwards the creed and cast differences arise, so please see the scenario from this point of view and you will be able to get along without much hustle bustle. Still keeping in mind some basic points might help us in finding the right combination of feelings and expression for someone with another race or culture.

Simplest and most effective tip:

Ask your partner out. For those of you who think that this works only for partners of their own cultural background, well you are two hundred percent ………incorrect. Simple act of asking out means showing how much you care for your partner and how much importance is there in your heart for him or her. It also is a proof of sacrifice and daring qualities which every man or woman wants to see in his or her partner. However making the move at the right time and with right choice is of paramount importance
Remove racism from your thoughts

Once you get over with the differences of race, your partner will have absolutely no problem doing so. Trust me, if you want someone to feel something you can do it very easily. Simple loose talk involving some particular discussion about races and cultural differences is all you need to ruin the party. So stop going back to differences and find the similarities.
Be the person with the right intellectual level

People with more often than not meet people of similar or higher mental caliber and like them. Even if there are other differences involved, a superior mental and emotional caliber is what is going to attract others. You do not need to do this just to get your soul mate interested. In fact this is something that you should do to groom up yourself. The differences between other people’s approach and their increased acceptance level are going to be the testimony to my suggestion.

Be honest

What matters for any long term relationship is the sincerity and honesty of its involved partners. No matter how charming your partner is or how beautiful you think that he or she is, in a long term scenario these things are bound to become lesser important. The differences in opinion may have a shade on your thinking about your spouse but if honesty prevails then there is nothing better than that.

Interracial Dating Attitudes Among College Students

2011-08-15T23:40:00.000-07:00

Six-hundred-twenty university students completed an anonymous confidential questionnaire designed to assess attitudes toward interracial dating. Almost one fourth (24.2%) reported having dated interracially and almost half (49.6%) expressed an openness to become involved in an interracial relationship. Blacks, cohabitants, and those with previous interracial dating experience were significantly more likely to express an openness to become involved in an interracial relationship. Implications for university faculty, therapists, and students are suggested.

Although the marriages of Quincy Jones (musician), Charles Barkley (professional basketball player) and Roger Ebert (film critic) are interracial, less than 5% of all marriages in the United States are interracial (Statistical Abstract of the United States: 1998). This relatively low percentage of interracial marriages has been stable for decades. However, increased individualism, tolerance for diversity, and greater minority enrollment in colleges and universities may result in more approving attitudes of college students toward interracial relationships. This study focused on attitudes and behaviors of college students regarding interracial relationships.

Data
The data consisted of 620 never married undergraduates from five first year level sociology courses at East Carolina University who voluntarily completed an anonymous questionnaire designed to assess the respondent's openness to become involved in an interracial relationship. Among the respondents, 63% were women; 37% were men. Eighty-percent were first year students and sophomores; twenty percent were juniors and seniors. The median age was 19. Respondents were predominately white (87%) and African-American (8.5%) with 1% Hispanic and 3.6% "other". About half (51.7%) were casually dating while the other half (48.3%) were involved in a reciprocal love relationship. Ten months was the median number of months respondents reported dating their current partner.

Items 17 and 18 on the 24 item questionnaire were "I am open to involvement in an interracial relationship" and "I have dated someone of another race." Respondents were asked to respond on a continuum- Strongly Agree, Agree, Disagree, Strongly Disagree. The category Neither Agree nor Disagree was also an option. Responses to Strongly Agree and Agree were combined as were responses to Strongly Disagree and Disagree. Individuals who circled Neither Agree nor Disagree were eliminated from the analysis. Five-hundred and twenty-two respondents acknowledged an agree or disagree position on being open to interracial dating. Five-hundred and eighty-three respondents reported that they had or had not dated interracially.

Findings and Discussion

Almost half (49.6%) of the respondents reported that they were open to involvement in an interracial relationship. Almost a quarter (24.2%) said that they had dated someone of another race. While there were no significant differences in sex (women vs men) or university rank (freshman, sophomore, junior, senior) between those who were open to interracial involvements and those who were not, there were significant differences in regard to race, cohabitation experience, previous interracial dating experience and openness to cohabit.

1. Race. Blacks were twice as likely as whites (83% vs 43%) to report that they were open to involvement in an interracial relationship. This finding was significant (p [is less than] .0000) suggesting that this difference would occur by chance less than one time in one hundred thousand. Previous researchers have documented the greater acceptance of blacks versus whites for interracial relationships (Rosenblatt et al., 1995). Explanations include more benefits from blacks joining the majority than vise versa, the greater number of whites available to blacks than vise versa, and the greater exposure of blacks to the white culture than vise versa. Finally, black mothers and white fathers have different roles in the respective black and white communities in terms of setting the norms of interracial relationships.

In many black families, mothers play the key role in accepting or not accepting an interracial relationship, much more than in white families. In white families, fathers were more often major players, as were siblings, grandparents, and other kin..."If women respond more often with openness and efforts to relate and less often with prejudice to the relationship choices of sons and daughters, then the fact that the crucial person in black families is most often a woman means there may be more acceptance of a family member's entry into an interracial couple" (Rosenblatt et al., 1995, 118).

2. Cohabitation Experience. Sixty percent of the college students in this sample who had lived together expressed an openness to become involved in an interracial relationship. Forty-seven percent of those who had not lived together expressed a similar willingness. This difference in cohabitants versus non-cohabitants over willingness to date interracially was statistically significant (p [is less than] .05). Both cohabitation and dating interracially are non normative behaviors. It is not surprising that students that elect to engage in non mainstream behavior in one area express this tendency in other areas.

3. Interracial Dating Experience. Ninety-two percent of the respondents who reported having dated interracially were open to doing so again. Only 32% of those who had not dated interracially were open to interracial involvement. This finding was statistically significant (p [is less than] .0000). The finding that exposure encourages acceptance is not unusual. Similar phenomenon in regard to racial attitudes has been documented (Hallinan and Teizeira, 1987; Homans, 1950; Slavin, 1979).

Summary and Implications

Almost half of the college students in this sample were open to involvement in a relationship with someone of another race. Almost a quarter had done so. Such openness to interracial dating is characteristic of both women and men and students of all academic ranks. Persons who are black, experienced in living together, and who have dated interracially are particularly approving of interracial involvement.

This study provides information for university students, faculty, and counselors about interracial dating as a part of the college experience. Racial barriers are, indeed, coming down as students test for themselves interracial relationships. Unique issues/benefits/problems related to these relationships await new research.

What’s So great about Black love? : Interracial Dating in America

2011-08-04T18:00:00.000-07:00

When I was 5 years old at PS 249 in brooklyn, New York, there was a little boy at my school named Anthony. He was cute and I liked him. He was my very first “boyfriend”. He broke up with me only a day after we started going steady because this little boy named Cory told him that I had cooties. When I was 12 years old I have a crush on this boy named Anthony ( hmm.. may its just the name I’m attracted too).

It never went anywhere because when I was 12, I was a dog. ( It was my awkward stage in life. One boob was bigger than the other. I didn’t know what to do with my hair and I had zero fashion sense) When I was 15 I started dating a guy named Michael. He was my first real boyfriend. I presented you with my early dating history because it is relevant to my point.

These boys/ men were not black. Not one. I HAVE dated black men since Michael and I broke up but I’ve also dated Asians and Latinos and more White guys. I DO NOT feel obligated to date black men because I don’t feel like I owe them anything. I’m not a black man basher. I believe that there are many black men who are worth it. I believe that they are intelligent and they have potential beyond belief. I believe that they can bring just as much to the table as any other “race”. But I do not feel like I have to only date black men to prove this point.

I was dating a man named T and he never believed that I would marry a black guy. He often said that I was white. When we finally did break up ( because I got tired of being ignored by someone who claimed they wanted to marry me) He made a snarky comment about just how long I was waiting to do it and how he hoped I was happy with my white boys. I also have a friend that theorizes that I date other races because I want my children to have a certain look.

I have another black male friend that believes I date interracially because I have been hurt by too many black men and i’m just bitter. ( The reality is.. I date guys whose personality traits don’t really mesh with mine. Two agressive people can’t be in a relationship together. Someone is going to feel as if they are suffocating and that someone is usually me.)

So lets talk statistics. Several studies have found that Black men are more likely to DATE interracially than any other group of men. It also found that Asian women were more likely to date interracially than any groups of women. Black women and Asian Men are the least likely to to be desired for interracial relationships. ( Maybe black women and Asian men should get together.. I promise the stereotypes aren’t true) ;-)

So I’m asking: if Black men, in general, do not feel obligated to commit to a black woman why should women? We are always talking about how black love is beautiful and expect that women stick to that line while men don’t have to. This is a terrible double standard. I say that people should date who ever makes them happy. However, I find it problematic when people date outside their race because they believe that there is lack within it.

I date outside my race because I believe that I can not limit my options if I want to find the best person for me. I date black men and white men and Asian men and Latinos and Ameri-Indian men and Multiracial men. I date who ever i am compatible with. Because after all its compatibility, SES and communication that determine the success or failure of a relationship.If you like dating black people then cool. If you like dating White people then cool. I do not believe that anyone has the right to criticize those who date interracially.

The final point I’d like to make has to do with the quote from the video. If you genuinely believe that black women who date interracially do it because they think “Black men aint S***” then maybe you should examine your self and ask why this is your thinking. Sometimes we project our feelings onto others so that we can make ourselves feel better about certain situations. If you feel as if you are lacking then do things to better yourself. ( Just a side note… Black men and women OVERWHELMINGLY choose each other.. so this whole blog could potentially be moot)

5-Fascinating-Interracial-Marriages-in-History

2011-08-03T18:09:00.000-07:00

Attitudes towards Interracial marriage have changed dramatically, in just the last generation. In the United States it was just 43 years ago when interracial marriage was made fully legal in all 50 states. Today, in many countries, interracial marriage is commonplace and most don’t even give it a second thought. However, as we all know, it wasn’t always this way in the past. This list includes individuals who didn’t let the prejudice of society make their decisions in life, and also paved the way for interracial couples in the future.

Note: Interracial marriage can convey a relationship between a Black and an Asian, a White and an Asian, a Hispanic and an Asian, a White and a Hispanic, etc. In this particular list I have included only black and white relationships.

5 Jack Johnson and Wives (Married in 1911,1912 & 1925)

Interesting Fact: At Johnson’s funeral, Johnson’s third wife Irene Pineau was asked by a reporter what she had loved about her husband. “I loved him because of his courage, he faced the world unafraid. There wasn’t anybody or anything he feared.” The photo above shows Johnson with his first wife, Etta Terry Duryea. Jack Johnson had no children.

4 Frederick Douglass and Helen Pitts (Married in 1884)

Interesting Fact: During Fredrick Douglass’s first marriage he had a 26 year affair with German feminist Ottilie Assing. In 1884, when she read in the newspapers that Douglass was to marry Helen Pitts, who was 20 years-younger, she committed suicide in a public park in Paris. The letters Douglass wrote to her were burned, and she left all her money to Douglass.

3 Joseph Philippe Laroche and Juliette Lafargue (Married in 1908)

Interesting fact: When Juliette returned to Paris with her daughters she gave birth to a son, Joseph Lemercier Laroche. The White Star Line, the company that owned the Titanic, was later forced to issue a public apology for the derogatory statements made by the crew. When Louise Laroche died on January 28, 1998, at the age of 87 it left only seven remaining survivors of the Titanic.

2 Sir Seretse Khama and Ruth Williams (Married in 1948)

Interesting Fact: Botswana was among the world’s poorest countries but during Seretse Khama’s tenure as president, Botswana had the fastest growing economy in the world. Khama instituted strong measures against corruption and reinvested money into infrastructure, health and education. In 2009, Seretse and Ruth’s fist son, Ian, won a landslide victory and became the fourth President of Botswana. Their younger son, Tshekedi , was elected as a parliamentarian.

1 Barack Obama, Sr. and Ann Dunham (Married in 1961)

Interesting Fact: Following Ann Dunham’s memorial service at the University of Hawaii, Obama and his half sister Maya spread their mother’s ashes in the Pacific Ocean at Lanai Lookout on the south side of Oahu. Obama scattered the ashes of his grandmother (Madelyn Dunham) who died November 2, 2008, in the same spot weeks after his election to the presidency.

Starting your interracial love from InterracialFriends.com - the best interracial dating site.

Tamera Mowry Wants Women To Consider Interracial Dating

2011-08-02T19:57:00.000-07:00

Tamera Mowry walked down the aisle for the first time this past May when she married her longtime boyfriend, Fox News Correspondent, Adam Housley. Tamera was the beaming bride with her twin sister Tia by her side as they celebrated her big day. Tamera sat down with Essence magazine to discuss her married life, being a good wife and the persistent question about her interracial marriage.

On the interracial question:

Well, I always find these questions so interesting, because I’m a product of an interracial marriage — and I never really grew up seeing color. I honestly realized that my dad was White when someone told me in middle school. They’re like, “Oh your dad’s White?” I’m like, “Oh, my gosh, he really is White.” I knew what race was, but it didn’t matter to me. Yes we are an interracial couple. The thing is we do still deal with that. People always question that. If anything, it hurts, but we do have more people supporting us then making stupid comments. We kind of just ignore it and focus on the positive. Love is love and a lot of times people might be in the situation they’re in because they put barriers up. Like some people only want to date a model, or an actor, or an athlete. You’re only limiting yourself. Open up to what’s out there because God made us all.

I recommend single women to try this professional interracial web: InterracialFriends.com.

McCoy's 3 Things To Know When Dating A White Man

2010-06-13T00:08:00.000-07:00

3 Things To Know When Dating A White Man Von-Anise McCoy

1. A bad hair day means nothing to him: People from thesame background can be harder on each other, because theyfeel a sense on camaraderie. Men from another racial background, especially white men, seem to be more accepting of a bad hair day. However, on the other hand, black men will be more forgiving if you happen to gain a little weight. The money that you save on the weekly trips to the salon will just have to be re-purposed for a trainer because slim and trim is the desired look.

2. Be prepared for the dirty looks: The same way some black girls see a black man with a white girl and give the couple a dirty look, white woman feel the same way when they see a white man with a woman of another race. I was shocked, when a white friend of mine told me that all of the good white guys were being taken by the Asian girls. If you’re going to be in an inter-racial relationship– do not take the reactions of strangers personal. A thick skin is mandatory–this is your man and you need to hold your head up high and ignore all negativity.

3. Just in case you were thinking it: Penis size is not an issue: I know that there is the myth of the big, black penis but that is an urban legend. A small penis can exist with a black man or a white one. The problem could be that your new white boyfriend might believe that rumor and feel a bit insecure–which can really work in your favor when it comes to foreplay, ifyou know what I mean! Just use reassuring lines like “Give me that big…” (you fill in the rest) while making love, to restore his wondering mind and sooth his ego.

PositiveSingleMatch.com offers dating and friendship options for all kinds of people, such as straight, gay, bisexual, and interracial dating

Is it wrong to refuse interracial dating?

2010-02-03T21:56:00.000-08:00

Over at The Root, Helena Andrews (who is black) writes about why she doesn't date white guys. The piece is entertaining, but good luck trying to find an actual argument in it. It did make me wonder, though, if it should even be necessary to make an argument about something as personal as that sort of preference. Personally, it doesn't bother me if Helena Andrews only wants to date black guys ... or if she only wants to date Hispanic men. Why should she, or anybody, have to justify that sort of thing? Do people really employ rational faculties when deciding on romantic partners? Should they have to?

In general, no -- but there are exceptions. Before I met my wife, I used to hang out with a Jewish friend, and I was quite attracted to her. I think she felt the same way about me. But we never explored that, and that was because of me. I was a religiously observant Catholic; she was a non-religious Jew. My faith was too important to me to make for a happy marriage -- and I strongly believe you shouldn't date someone you couldn't see marrying in time.
Similarly, I completely understand the view among some Jews that Jews should only marry other Jews, not only for religious reasons, but because the intermarriage rate is so high that a distinctive Jewish culture (and religion) is in danger of being assimilated. There's a lot of wisdom in prohibitions among religious communities -- Jewish, Christian, Muslim, etc. -- against marrying outside the faith.

Ethnically speaking, I always dated Caucasian girls, not because I ruled out dating outside my race, but that's just how things went. For me, as an adult, religious compatibility was the most important factor in dating, at least as important as personal chemistry. But culture is also enormously important. I would have chosen to date a middle-class educated black girl who liked the same kinds of things as I did over a working-class white girl who hadn't gone to college, and who had different interests. It's not that one is morally better than the other, but only that chances are the black woman and I are going to have more in common than the white girl and I will. On the other hand, a couple of the unrequited crushes I had back in college and right out of college were on northern European women. Had we married, I wonder how our different cultural backgrounds would have affected our relationship? My wife and I come from neighboring states, but she had a different childhood growing up in the Dallas suburbs than I had growing up in rural south Louisiana. It's hard enough explaining my homeland and its native culture to a woman from suburban Dallas, much less from, say, downtown Stockholm. (And, for my putative Euro-bride, vice versa).

All of which is to say that if Helena Andrews only wants to date black guys, that's fine with me. I don't think it's right to expect her to justify her choice, at least not on ethnic terms. Nor do I think it's right to ask a white woman who doesn't want to date black guys to justify her choice. The heart wants what it wants. But if one doesn't want to date partners of another race on grounds of principle as opposed to instinctive preference (e.g., "I don't date white guys because I think it's wrong" versus "I don't know why, but I just don't find white guys attractive"), I think one ought to at least question oneself and one's motives.

Interracial dating still not accepted

2009-03-05T18:13:00.000-08:00

Interracial dating still not wholly approved of in United States

Although attitudes surrounding intercultural and interracial dating may have improved in recent years, there are still hardships that many have to face in choosing their partners. Thursday, the Ohio State Multicultural Center took on this issue by orchestrating an open discussion about dating, race and culture.

Elizabeth Warren, Intercultural Specialist at the MCC, said that people should discuss highly personal issues more often. "We are in a place in our world and culture where we need to create a space for open dialogue," she said. During the dialogue on Thursday, students discussed a variety of issues, from society's views on interracial dating to how families put pressure on their children to date within their culture or race.

Some states banned interracial marriages in the U.S. until 1967. Kashif Khan, intercultural specialist for the MCC, remembers the time in American history when interracial dating and marriage were a consequence of war.

"We are [an] imperialistic country and went into a lot of countries for military reasons. Soldiers got together with indigenous people. For example, in Japan, they claimed 'war brides,'" he said.
With the expansion of diasporic communities in America's melting pot, many different cultures and races have dated, married and had children because of proximity in big cities such as New York and San Francisco.

"General exposure to different types of people allowed for interracial dating to happen, although society tried to control it," Khan said.

The discussion led to an agreement that there is an "authenticity gap" between public and private acceptance of diversity in dating and marriage. This gap is the difference between how people react to interracial or intercultural dating in public, and what they say behind closed doors.

Because some people are intolerant of interracial relationships, some feel they need to validate their relationship, said Teena Poole, administrative associate for the MCC.

"Some people feel that they have to justify why they fell in love with someone outside their realm," she said.

Khan said society can bridge the gap between attitudes about interracial or intercultural dating by examining their own values. "It comes down to your own values," he said.

"Are you compassionate? How is being discriminatory against interracial/intercultural dating compassionate?"

Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry: Vanity Fair Partiers

2009-02-23T23:35:00.000-08:00

Joining a mass of fellow celebrities, Halle Berry was spotted arriving at the 2009 Vanity Fair Oscar Party hosted by Graydon Carter at the Sunset Tower Hotel last night.

The “Monster’s Ball” babe was joined by her boyfriend/babydaddy Gabriel Aubry (From AfroMingle.com) and looked stunning in a strapless black-with-gold-accents dress as she posed for the paparazzi.

At a recent event, Miss Berry revealed that motherhood has completely changed her perspective and priorities for the better.

She said, “As a woman, I thought it was all about work and accomplishments. Then this little baby comes along and says that it’s not about that. I’m complete. I have more to offer my craft because [my daughter] makes me indelibly better every day.”

Black men, marrying black, marrying white

2009-02-23T22:36:00.000-08:00

There is this stereotype that once Black men become successful, they marry interracially as a sign that they have made it. Picture this: an influential, charming, attractive Black man with a Black woman in his arms. Now imagine the same man with a White woman in his arms. Does this change your perception of him? How and why?

In the video, Dr. France Twine wonders why it is perceived that a lot of Black men are marrying White women while in reality, the percentage of black man/white woman interracial relationships is totally on the lower side … unless the norm still is that they shouldn’t marry any? What do you think?

Purple mixed with green is beautiful

2009-02-10T00:14:00.000-08:00

Interracial relationships still a challenge for younger generation to accept

Yes, let's go there. Personally, I have no problem with interracial relationships. I think that it's a beautiful thing and that the babies produced (pertaining to straight couples) are beautiful.

Everyone is beautiful, no matter what skin color you have, if your hair is curly, if your hips are wide or if you lips are thin. Everyone is beautiful. Therefore, I don't understand when people look at a mixed child and turn up their noses. Yes, there is that possibility of not "fitting into one world," but in all honesty, it's still a child. It's still beautiful.

Of course interracial doesn't mean just black and white. It means, Black, White, Asian, Hispanic, Middle-Eastern, green, purple, whatever. Racial boundaries should not exist anymore, and yet they do. People tend to focus on others in their own racial group. Looking outside of that still has a bit of a taboo effect on people. They treat it like it's something wrong. But people are people.
Everyone is a person and everyone has the right to love whomever they wish to love. You can't help whom you fall in love with. No one should be forced to feel wrong for that.

In this day and age, race still plays a part in the selection of a better half. I believe that cannot be changed until people change. But sadly, you can't force anyone to change their views or their beliefs. And just as people shouldn't be forced to feel bad about their interracial relationship, no one should be forced to feel bad about their views on dating inside their race.

Everyone has a preference, but everyone should also be respected for that. I see this more in older people that have fought against prejudices and racism. They feel they need to keep their family as pure as possible, and that keeping it to one race would keep their thoughts and beliefs alive. Sadly, they will not live forever. And no one wishes to see those people die, but they will. And I believe these racial lines with die along with them. When people accept and treat everyone with respect, the human race grows. We understand and we learn more about other people. You can't receive, nor give with, a closed fist. And as we move further in our technological world, we must also move further in our acceptance of differences.

Interracial Date Outside Their Race

2008-07-21T19:30:00.000-07:00

For those looking to date outside their race, interracial dating sites are the right places to begin the search. There are those that are free and those that charge a small fee in order to make the dating experience easier.

Certain people have a particular interest in dating people of other races. These websites use the code interracial dating in order to invite people who are free and open to the mixing of different cultures. These sites are the ultimate place to place interracial personals so that other people searching for love can go through them. All you need to do is set up a profile of yourself with your interests and you also have the option of uploading a photograph of yourselves for better results.

This saves you time in looking for the right partner by narrowing down the options for you. For those who are into black white dating or latino white dating e.t.c. here you get to meet various singles from various races, nationalities and ethnic groups with the same goal … dating interracially.

Biracial America by the numbers

2008-07-09T02:35:00.000-07:00

A look at interracial America by the numbers:

MARRIAGE: Since 1970 the number of interracial marriages has soared more than sevenfold. In 1970 about 310,000 couples were interracial, less than 1 percent of all marriages. In 2006 the number grew to 2.3 million couples, or 3.8 percent of all marriages.

RACE: In 2000, the census allowed Americans for the first time to identify themselves by more than one racial category. About 6.8 million described themselves as more than one race - 2.4 percent of the population.

ADOPTION: Since 1990, the number of international adoptions has more than doubled. In 1990, there were 7,093 international adoptions; in 2006, 20,679 were recorded. Since 1990, about 250,000 children have been adopted from abroad.
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Sources: Census Bureau, State Department.

Filling the Gap with new harmonies

2008-07-09T02:20:00.000-07:00

STEEL DRUMS and bagpipes never did share playing time – which may be just as well for the audiences at this year’s Nova Scotia tattoo.

It would be a creative – and brave – music arranger who tried to bring together these two distinctive sounds. Imagine the racket that could emerge: the rhythmic ping-ponging of the pans against the mournful keening of the pipes. Oh, my tender ears!

Still, the week-long Royal Nova Scotia International Tattoo that wrapped up last night in Halifax is to be applauded for this musical adventure: for introducing the Trinidad and Tobago Defence Force Steel Band to this land of bagpipes. Whether booked merely as a novelty or as a nod to our increasing diversity, no matter. The sounds of steel pans in a hockey arena – accompanied by limbo dancers no less – must surely be a sign of our cross-cultural times.

Perhaps you notice this more readily in the people you greet, the foods in the new restaurants or, yes, in the music being played. For me, it lies in interracial marriages. When recent headlines touted Love in Canada Is Colour-Blind or How the Lines Between Races Are Blurring, I smiled knowingly. Sometimes we don’t need research to confirm what experience has already taught: that despite the odd challenge, society has become far more accepting of mixed unions, my own included.

Nevertheless, the numbers are telling: Nearly 300,000 Canadians were in mixed marriages or common-law relationships in 2006 – an increase of nearly 30 per cent over 2001. The segment is still small, just four per cent of all couples, up from 2.6 per cent in 1991. But the experts say the segment’s steady growth is what’s interesting.

Statistics Canada began tracking the data as one gauge of the country’s diversity and to examine ways in which ethnicities integrate. In our churches and mosques and temples. In the cutlery drawer where chopsticks are as plentiful as forks. In the faces of our children.

I balk somewhat at the word interracial: It takes me back to Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner, a 1967 movie with the then groundbreaking premise of black marrying white. The word harkens back to a time when such unions were illegal in many states. And where it was legal, like Canada, it was still frowned on, tut-tutted at – an aberration worthy in 1935 of front-page treatment in The Halifax Herald when a "spinster" filed intentions to wed a Chinese man in Boston.

For immigrant families, whether white or of colour, it can be particularly hard on the parents. They watch, almost helpless, as their growing children shed much of their homeland customs to embrace Canadiana. And if their children marry "outside," they know the loss can be deep. They know that their son or daughter must adopt some of the ways of another culture, and that their grandchildren will fall somewhere in between.

Yet this blurring of the lines is to be expected in a multicultural society – where the cultures mix and the numbers of our own race could produce slim pickings. My siblings, cousins and I tried to explain this to our parents – as in turn we married "English," which meant anyone who wasn’t Chinese. The older ones paid the heavier price. My brother defied my parents in marrying a Trinidad woman of Portuguese and Spanish descent. It took my parents years – and the birth of the first grandchild, a boy – before they could welcome my sister-in-law into the family.

A cousin faced opposition from the other side – her fiance’s white American parents. They refused to go to the wedding and barred his three brothers from attending. They too came around with the birth of the first grandchild. But, as with my sister-in-law, the damage was already done.

My parents, and other immigrants of their generation, grew more accepting in time (though always hopeful for a uni-cultural union). When it was my turn, the main challenge came from strangers. The stares were intrusive, relentless. My husband, a normally calm soul, would sometimes become angry. How did I put up with it? he asked. I’m used to being visible, I replied.

Oddly, his discomfort eased too with the arrival of our firstborn. As we walked together, pushing a stroller, we were still stared at, and then the eyes would fall on the baby. We came to realize that this stare was different – in it was an honest curiosity about what a mixed union had produced. And invariably, a smile would follow. In this, my husband found acceptance.

Always, the hope lies in our children. My husband and I call them the Gap generation: the young faces of mixed unions, with features that are neither yours nor mine but belong to the globe. Because they come to more than one culture, they are raised in many. Children like my great-nephew who counts in his blood the flow of Chinese, West Indian, Portuguese, Spanish, Mexican and Peruvian Incan.

I worry sometimes whether these children will grow up feeling ungrounded. Whether they will miss a deep affinity to a past, or whether they will try to embrace several histories. Will our sons ever experience that sense of place and pride that their father, he of the clan MacLeod, does on hearing the bagpipes?

Likely not – no more than their hearts will pound like their mother’s on hearing the steel drums of her Trinidadian childhood. But these are our roots, not theirs. Our job is to give them a new grounding – one that I hope combines the best of two.

From there, perhaps they will create their own music, dance to their own beat – across cultures and across different races. For if there is a generation that could possibly harmonize steel drums and bagpipes, this may well be it.

Interracial Marriage

2008-06-19T03:44:00.000-07:00

How many people reading this know an interracial married couple? How many know that until 1967 there were still 16 states that had laws against interracial marriage? These laws were called miscegenation laws, and they dated back as far as the 1600s.

In 1967, in the landmark Supreme Court case Loving v. Virginia, the Warren court decided that these laws were against the Constitution.

Why this look back in time? Because last month, House Joint Resolution 89, otherwise known as the "Marriage Protection Amendment," was introduced in the U.S. House of Representatives. Simply put, it states, "Marriage in the United States shall consist only of the union of a man and a woman."

This is a bill that will discriminate against a group of citizens in the United States merely on the basis of sexual orientation. There have been many battles fought in the United States against different forms of discrimination and oppression. The fight for equal rights for the GLBT (gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered) community, much like the fight for equality of women, is still being fought, and the fight for marriage is the latest battle to be fought in this war.

There are numerous reasons people against gay marriage use to fight it. One of my favorites is that we will ruin the sanctity of marriage. Are these people living in the same country as I am? The one where the divorce rate is over 50 percent? My question to these people is: How can we possibly do more damage to the sanctity of marriage than the heterosexual community already has?

My wife and I have been married since August of 2007, and we are eagerly looking forward to our first anniversary in two months. Can anyone reading this tell me that our marriage has affected them in any way at all?

The fact of the matter is that marriage is a very personal state of affairs, and no one should have the right to say who should and should not be allowed to marry, as long as those two people are adults.

All citizens of the United States are supposed to be created equal; marriage being legal between only a man and a woman is not equality.

The Constitution is a very sacred piece of the history of this country and should never be used as something to further the agenda of any politician. Nor should it ever be amended in such a manner as to discriminate against certain citizens of this country.

It should not matter what one's nationality, race, sexual orientation or any other marker of identity is. Discrimination is wrong.

Interracial dating has ruined my life

2008-06-04T01:08:00.000-07:00

My best friend and I sat in the library, giggling.

Why? We had just noticed my white, blond friend had a white Mac, and I, a black girl, had a black Mac, and it was the funniest thing in the world. Apparently no one else noticed, but we were convinced everyone was snickering at us.

We have spent our whole lives together. We even believed for a while we were the same race, and possibly related. The problems started when we realized we weren't, and the world was not ready for a color-blind love like ours. Our jokes raised hatred from both sides.

Interracial relationships have ruined my life.

First, they caused a minor identity crisis within myself.

My life began with an interracial relationship. My stern Barbadian father somehow duped my beautiful and kind Puerto Rican mother into marrying him, and the confusion began. They moved to a mostly white suburb and did not allow me to speak slang or watch BET.

Not only do I confuse my English and Spanish all the time, I look just like my Puerto Rican mother but I'm so dark no one believes me, and I am often mistaken for a Dominican refugee.

Second, they have made me politically incorrect.

When my best friend and I play "Never Have I Ever," she says, "Never have I ever been black."

I, of course, say, "Never have I ever been white." Then we drink entirely too much to celebrate how ridiculous we are.

Once, we played with a diverse group, and when she did her typical "Never have I ever been black" no one laughed. Everyone stared at us in horror as we downed our beers to wash out the awkwardness.

My friend and I love making racially awkward jokes. I call her my white b----, she introduces me as her black friend. I make fun of her "Mississippi booty," as one man said, that attracts hoards of black men, while she mocks the skinny white boys that tend to be my downfall.

We are convinced the NAACP and the KKK are out to get us, and in general, people of all races are afraid of us.

Last, they have destroyed my dating life. Not only am I constantly mocked for the series of white boys on my arm, everyone feels the need to comment on it.

I remember when in high school, I was the new kid, and everyone wanted to know who I had a crush on. I was in love with the high school quarterback, with hazel eyes and soft brown hair. Everyone else decided I liked Delrico, THE ONLY BLACK BOY IN THE GRADE.

The rumors that ensued upon my arrival convinced him that I was interested. I spent the rest of the year avoiding his affection. It also caused my high school love to believe that I did not like white boys, and we could never be together. (My "white b----" dated him instead.)

In college, things only became worse. When I walk down the street, white boy in tow, the men lined up in front of UDF yell things like "Damn white boy, where you get a fine black girl like that?" and other uncomfortable things. My white boys also like to talk about it. Some of my favorite lines?

"I done dated a black girl once, it was real nice."

"I think it's weird that you've dated so many white guys, but you're the only black girl I've been with."

"I made out with a black girl once. It wasn't what I thought it would be."

Sorry?

Worse, my own family finds my predicament hilarious. Once at a sporting event, my mother asked me what piece of chicken I would like. I chose dark meat, telling my mother, "I don't like white meat."

My mother looked at me and shouted, "Oh yes you do!"

For the first time in my life, an entire stadium of people was laughing at me.

As time goes on, I have come to terms with the mix of people in my life. My inability to sense what is racially inappropriate has caused me a lot of trouble, but at the same time, I have so many more friends because I don't really care about race. I have more fun, and I belong everywhere.

A couple weeks ago my best friend and I convinced an entire room of drunks we were related.

"Do you guys have the same dad?" one girl asked in confusion.

"Of course," my best friend said. "We're sisters."

That's true love.

Same-Sex and Interracial Marriage Find Common Ground

2008-05-22T00:36:00.000-07:00

In the 1948 case of Perez v. Sharp, the California Supreme Court struck down a ban on interracial marriage.

Chief Justice Ronald M. George quoted from the Perez decision three times while the current court was ruling on the legality of a ban on same-sex marriage. It seemed that the chief justice accepted that the struggle for same-sex marriage closely paralleled that of the struggle to legalize interracial marriages, reports the New York Times. When the California Supreme Court majority found Thursday that same-sex couples had a right to marry, they cited Perez.

Opponents of same-sex marriage are uncomfortable with the analogy, reports the New York Times. Monte Stewart, president of the Marriage Law Foundation, says the parallel only works on the surface. "Marriage in its deep logic has nothing to do with race and everything to do with the union of a man and a woman," said Stewart.

The Perez decision came long before the rest of the nation started desegregation, as another six years would pass before Brown v. Board of Education, where the United States Supreme Court ruled in 1954 that segregated schools violated the Constitution. Thirteen years would pass before the U.S. Supreme Court would also strike down bans on interracial marriage in the 1967 case of Loving v. Virginia, according to the New York Times.

As the Perez decision occurred so long before the rest of the nation's attempts at equality, the history of interracial marriage restrictions can be viewed in two ways. The Perez court can be said to have started the wave of equality with an early decision in the right direction. Or, it can be said that the court overrode the democratic process in making a decision most of the country was not yet willing to embrace.

The parallels will continue to be drawn as the analysis of the current court's decision to legalize same-sex marriage continues.

Source: The New York Times