The Irish Keep Gate-Crashing

The summer of '08

2008-09-17T23:00:00.001+09:00

Thought for the day: It's hard to think of calendar-specific puns for titles every time.

What, you might ask, has been happening in the world of Tom? Or, then again, you might not. I presume that some of you have actual jobs with deadlines and more productive things to do than sit on the Internets all evening munching [insert popular local brand] crisps.

It's been a hot, hot, summer in Korea and I've been thankful that, unlike my heatstroked better half, I have an apartment with air conditioning instead of a concrete oven-sauna. September has brought a much-welcomed respite from the intense heat, and in a mere matter of months we'll forget it was ever summer as we huddle in our winter jackets and try to stop fingers dropping off. Such is life.

Ruth and I hopped over to HK and Macau for our summer hols at the end of July, trading the heat and humidity of Seoul for, well, even more heat and humidity. Nevertheless, a change is as good as a rest, and we had a great time sightseeing, shopping, and eating well. We took in the sights- Kowloon, the peak tram, the harbour lightshow - and managed a day-trip to Macau for a taste of casino razzmatazz and Portuguese influences. I was so taken aback by the scale of the place that I completely forgot to have even a quick flutter on the roulette tables.(though the lure of the myriad culinary delights of the food court and the shopping mall meant the casino moguls still made a few bucks from our patronage.

Highlight of the trip for me wasn't the glitz of the Venetian, or the Victoria harbour waterfront, or even the pandas in Ocean Park, but rather our quiet Friday evening in Stanley. Stanley is a 'quaint' seafront town on the south of the island. Looking out over the small harbour, enjoying a dinner of steak and chips, I could almost imagine that we were sitting in a quiet seaside town at home rather than the gateway to all of China.

The big bike trip looms ever closer. The bikes are currently in the post and winging their way from New Zealand. David has been in possession of his recumbent cycle for a month and has been racking up the miles as he gets used to its unorthodox layout. I've taken steps I swore I never would, investing in some spandex cycle shorts. Lemme tell ya, they might look daft, but the comfort factor (almost) balances it out.

Cycling over the summer has consisted of day trips here and there- Uijeongbu, Ilsan, Anyang and other points around Seoul. I was working extra classes and didn't get much midweek cycling except for my weekly visits to the rock climbing wall. The club, incidentally, has faded into obscurity, with several of the most dedicated members having moved away to pastures new or gone home for good.

I get the feeling that October and November are going to be big biking months. Ruth will be off adventuring round SE Asia with her mate Tracey so, to console myself, I'll be hitting the roads for many miles of bike-based hilarity.

Finally, our favorite thespian and party thrower, Chris, is currently engineering his imminent return to the RoK, relieving us from the worry of what to do this Halloween. Hurry up, dude! Guitar Hero hasn't been played in months and I still have two cans of your light beer in my fridge !

What's the carbon deficit on 3 air-freighted velocipedes?

2008-09-11T21:19:00.001+09:00

I only ask because...the touring bikes are on their way!

Am I excited? Well...

Prepare for unforeseen consequences

2008-09-10T22:26:00.001+09:00

As Mike has written over on his blog, the innuendo quotient of of a machine called the Large Hadron Collider (just repeat it a few times slowly if you're stuck) can only be discounted by the humorless or non Anglophones among you.

CERN physicists got to play with their new toy earlier today. However, as I write this, the world hasn't ended. For those of you breathing a sigh of relief, it's worth noting that so far they've just been trying to get a single particle beam to spin round the accelerator track. The potentially black hole-spawning, grab-your-crowbars, apocalypse-generating collisions won't begin until there are two beams spinning in opposite directions, which will be a while yet.

I may even have time to grow another goatee...

Chinese Takeaway Getaway

2008-07-26T18:17:00.004+09:00

Update time.

Summer intensives have been ongoing for the past six weeks and I've got another three in August. This means I've been pulling lots of extra classes for not much extra pay (a very sore point with me) and have been getting little in the way of a lie-in these days. Also, rainy season has finally arrived and has been in full swing for much of the week. The forecast for the next few days is similarly gloomy.

Today, however, I'm not too concerned by either rain or teaching as the summer holiday has begun -all nine glorious days of it.

Ruth and I are off to Hong Kong on Monday morning for six days of fun in the sun. I'm really excited since I've never been to China before and the lure of Cantonese cuisine, British civilization, and Mars bars (non deep-fried) is a strong one. Also, this will likely be my last trip anywhere before the Big One in 2009 so I plan to make the most of it.

I've spent today pottering round the apartment and catching up on my telly. Feels great to be without a schedule or at the beck and call of school bells and alarm clocks.

packing -15 minutes

cleaning and laundry - 1 hour

watching telly - 5 hours

Knowing you've got bugger all to do today - priceless!

LOST weekend

2008-06-15T18:16:00.001+09:00

While David, Katie and Jared were off exploring peace dams and hills in Chuncheon, Ruth and I opted to spend the long weekend on Deokjeokdo, one of the West Sea's hidden gems. This was my second excursion to the picturesque island retreat, the first being in September 2006. It's not really much more hassle to get there than Muuido, and the payoff -proper beaches and swimming - is well-worth the extra ferry cost.

Since my last visit, there were few noticeable changes in the little village of Seopori. Still the same old houses/corner stores and minbaks, though many were in the process of being given a fresh coat of paint. There were some beautiful some new pensions at the back of the village. We noticed this only after agreeing to stay with some of Ruth's fellow Siheung-ers in a cramped little minbak just off the main (for main, read only) street, six to a room. They're fun folks, and I didn't really mind staying there (I just love to have something to bitch about), but would love to check out a nice faux-European pension when I'm feeling flush sometime and have the benefit of reservations (They were all booked out anyway).

The lack of available accommodation was in part due to the presence of a large number of tourists, both Korean (i.e. ajumas in hiking gear) and foreign (i.e. teachers with cans of beer). We had been forced to catch the lunchtime ferry because the morning one had sold out. Most of the waygookins were ensconced in various cliques and groupings along the beach, as we saw a few familiar faces among the assembled masses.

Saturday morning was misty and overcast. With little else to do but gaze at the Carpenter-esque fog enveloping the beach, I enjoyed a leisurely breakfast of Family Mart pastries in the lifeguard tower while Ruth snapped pictures of some random Korean beach-goers. It was not the most glorious of mornings, and we contemplated cutting our losses and heading for Seoul ,

Around midday, however, the fog suddenly cleared and the island was bathed in glorious sunshine. Any thoughts of departure were quickly forgotten. Armed with water, Gatorade, and some Korean digestive biscuits, Ruth and I set off up the hill - well, at least we did after taking a few wrong turns in the back alleys and lanes behind the village.

In contrast to the well-maintained paths encountered in 2006, the trail was now quite overgrown in places, making me wish I'd worn long trousers instead of shorts. Ruth quite rightly ridiculed me for whinging about the thorny brambles that occasionally crisscrossed the path.

The hilltop pagoda, once freshly painted, now looked rather forlorn and dilapidated. A host of flies meandered through the weather-beaten rafters, and the place gave off a forlorn air. However, the spectacular view from the ridgeline had lost none of its luster. Even though the far-away islands were lost in the haze, the beaches and coves of Deokjeokdo were still there for all to see, breathtaking in their beauty.

On our way down we passed a few old shacks entangled in a mass of weeds and vines. I barely remembered them from last time, but on this occasion they gave me the absolute creeps. I just have way too active an imagination and they reminded me a little too much of the creepy cabin in LOST. One glimpse of a swinging rocking chair and I would have been out of there as fast as my little Irish legs could carry me. Ruth was similarly spooked. Perhaps the earlier discussion about Japanese soldiers roaming the jungles of the Philippines was, in hindsight, a bad conversation topic.

The funny part is, the shack is mere minutes from civilization. We passed a similar ruin just down the track . The second one, in the open and littered with discarded farm rubbish, was not in the least bit eerie.

In the evening, following another delicious dinner at the little restaurant, we all yomped down to the beach and blagged our way into one of the campfire circles. This was made easy by the fact that the group had been already invaded by the island's quite inebriated baseball team, who were trying to give everyone soju and beer shots, and setting off roman candles at a proximity that bordered on the criminally negligent. Few things are potentially more catastrophic than people who mix soju and fireworks, but we escaped unscathed.

All in all, it was a feel-good return and a relaxing way to spend the weekend. Time permitting, I have every intention to go back in the autumn.

SatC-isfaction guaranteed

2008-06-09T12:22:00.001+09:00

One sure inkblot test for guys and girls is to show them a HBO logo like this one and ask them what they think of.

As a long-time Sopranos fan, I always expect to hear the sounds of "Woke Up This Morning" and images of the New Jersey Turnpike flashing by. For millions of women, however, the instant response would be "Sex and the City".

All this is a rather convoluted way of saying that Ruth dragged me along to a showing of the ode to New York fashion, sizzling sex and rollercoaster relationships yesterday afternoon.

The movie was actually quite enjoyable, not that I was expecting it to be too excruciating to watch. Spending a year and a half with female flatmates at uni meant that I've seen more than a few episodes of the venerable HBO stalwart in my time. Thus, I went into the theater safe in the knowledge that I was unlikely to be gnawing my arm off to escape from 2 hours of mind-numbing boredom.

Though I generally liked the movie (Oy! No snickering in the back!), I did have a few issues with the plot. Everything had been pretty much wrapped up with pretty little ribbons by the end of the series so they had to make a few characters miserable and unhappy simply so there would be a convenient story arc to write about. The end product of this tinkering is a slightly artificial, paint-by-numbers exercise in screenwriting, albeit an entertaining one. I'm not going to go into the specifics of the storyline, except to say that the word "coloring" will take on a whole new and smile-raising meaning.

So guys, take one for the team and accompany your significant other to your local cinema. It wont be the worst movie you see this year. If the thought still horrifies you, remember this soothing fact: There are boobies.

These things come in threes

2008-05-08T10:46:00.001+09:00

Freak waves in Boryeong, bird flu knocking at the doors of Seoul , and a comeback for malaria by the DMZ. Sounds like a perfect excuse to bolt the doors and stay inside all weekend playing GTA iv.
Though if you are one of the magic 94% of Koreans mentioned in this piece of - ahem - "responsible" journalism, better lay off the Big Macs while you're playing.

And just to be safe, I'd leave the fan off if I were you.

How do you eat yours?

2008-04-10T10:06:00.001+09:00

I've recently come into possession of that most prized of chocolaty treasures, a Cadbury's Creme Egg.

They're rarer than hens' teeth in Korea, and the unexpected gift has left me in a a bit of a philosophical quandary. I'm torn between the idea of wolfing it down right away and the resignation that, once I eat it, there won't be another one 'til next year.

While I contemplate this eternal question, here's a video of some suicidal Creme Eggs:

Handy tips

2008-04-10T08:57:00.001+09:00

Ever felt that your hands are much too interesting for your mundane existence? Now there's a solution! Introducing... the new hand blander, for hum-drum hands and dull digits.

We called the dog Indiana

2008-04-10T08:49:00.001+09:00

Tired, wet, cold. Riding home in the rain is never all that much fun, and so it was last night. The knowledge that a sizeable percentage of my mates had the day off for the local elections and didn't even have to leave their abodes only served to further dampen my enthusiasm for the journey. Only the assurance that, with polling closed, I would no longer have to dodge the electioneering happy-clappers and their megaphone vans at Yatap station raised my spirits a notch.

Then I saw this:

..and all was right in the world. Indy's a-coming!

On yer bike!

2008-03-27T12:35:00.001+09:00

Spring is in the air (and half the Gobi desert, but that's another story), so it's been a time to dust off the bike, brave the clouds of Yellow Dust(TM) outside, and go cycling again. The weather, unfortunately, has tended to dither back and forth between glorious spring mildness and the bollock-freezing dregs of a Siberian winter like an uncommitted . I've put off several morning bike trips due to unfavorable conditions..and my own lingering laziness from a winter of hibernating indoors (not to mention that I'm a complete pussy when it comes to cycling any further than work in cold weather). Beginning, as they say, is the hardest part.

Still, I have managed to drag my reluctant backside up to the mouth of the Tancheon a few times to take in the splendor that of mildly smoggy days on the Hanggang.

------------------

I even went as far as joining everyone's favorite Kiwi for a 60-km jaunt around the peripheries of Bundang on Saturday. Highlight of the circuit was when Jared showed me a stretch of almost-finished highway down by Suji. It's only a few km long but there's something infinitely cool about having your own private 6-lane bike path; coasting along the meridian without a car in sight. I suppose this is what it must feel like to be in one of those post-apocalyptic survivor moves, minus the twin downsides of marauding cutthroat bandits and inevitable legions of undead zombies.

Koreans say the funniest things: #481

2008-03-27T12:08:00.001+09:00

The spelling in this first offering is just too terrible to be anything but deliberate....right?

Jolly Pong- for the happiest flatulence in Asia.

St. Patrick's Day 2008

2008-03-27T12:04:00.001+09:00

Some overdue updates of this year's parade. I actually got to take part and march in the parade this year, thanks to Keiran, Dairin, and their football team, Goyang Locomotive FC.

There was wheaten bread and Barry's Tea, for which the Koreans lined up for in droves. Mmmm, tastes like home.

For their entry, Guinness employed a towering inflatable and some dancing K-girls in shoulderless pint dresses, along with several dozen locals who'd filled out a form on their website and got some free T-shirts and balloons.

Me & Ruth

Reflections.

More Guinness-based malarkey.

The after-concert was rather good this year. We only stuck around for an hour or so as there was a pretty chilly breeze whipping along the Cheonggyechgon, but in that time we managed to catch part of the excellent set by Korean song-smiths Bard, a four-piece who specialize in Irish trad music . They wowed the crowd with, among other numbers, a powerful rendition of the Oscar-winning number from the movie Once.

Anyone can play guitar

2008-03-14T13:11:00.001+09:00

I recently picked up a copy of casual-gaming favorite, Guitar Hero. Now I too can enjoy strumming a plastic Fisher-Price guitar and rocking out to the sounds of The Who , Pearl Jam, Smashing Pumpkins, Guns n' Roses and a whole host more, basking in the adulation of a virtual crowd. Fun and very addictive, but I think it's going to be slightly cast aside now that the warm spring weather has arrived and I can finally, finally get back on my bike for a morning jaunt along the Tancheon.

For a funny take on the subject, check out this lightning fast, profanity-littered review from Zeropunctuation, the worlds fastest-talking games journo:

Sub-standards

2008-03-14T12:45:00.001+09:00

KORAIL would like to remind you that -shock! horror! - groping passers-by whilst on the subway is a no-no. I

Furthermore, they would also like to remind amorous couples to restrain their passionate clinches because it irritates old ajossis who aren't getting any.

Beck of the net

2008-03-14T12:43:00.001+09:00

There may have been 11 men on the Galaxy squad last Saturday, but everyone was there to see just one.

The match itself was a bit dull, as football games go. I know it was a friendly but they could have put a bit more effort into it. Maybe the cold hampered the stars of LA's finest a little, accustomed as they are to Californian sunshine.

Goal-less for 90 minutes, David did eventually get a chance to shine, slotting in Galaxy's only successful penalty kick in the post-match shootout, which finished 2-1 in favor of FC Seoul.

Lock-picks?

2008-03-14T12:42:00.001+09:00

Have you ever had a craving for Tupperware, or woken up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat because you don't have enough containers for your kimchi and crackers.

Well, if you happen to live near downtown Bundang, then rest easy, for the Lock & Lock store in Seohyeon has more Tupperware than even the most imaginative kitchen freak could possibly find a use for.

I'm sorry, I know that a good business should try to carve a niche for itself, but I just don't see the need for an entire store dedicated to airtight plastic lunchboxes that are freely available -at a lower price, might I add -in any supermarket in town.

The boy who cried spring

2008-02-27T23:00:00.001+09:00

"We won't see any more snow this winter" -Tom, Yongpyeong ski resort, 12:15pm, Saturday

It then proceeded to snow on and off for much of Saturday evening and Sunday morning. To be fair, the previous day it had been about 10 degrees in Bundang, so I wasn't entirely talking out of my arse.

However, sometimes you're not just wrong, but spectacularly so. This was the scene I found when I emerged from the office on Monday evening.

My bicycle was an icicle.

A floodlit stream near Yatap.

My apartment building. Very arty pic.

Today, the snow's mostly gone again, but one should never count one's chickens 'til they've defrosted, or something like that.

The family that plays together, stays together

2008-02-27T22:51:00.001+09:00

David and Kath taking their dogs for a walk, Nintendo style.

Oh (Danny) Boy!

2008-02-27T22:40:00.001+09:00

An mhaith! An mhaith!

Lovely to see you

2008-02-18T11:52:00.001+09:00

A picture says a thousand words... or sometimes just one.

Yes? ..No!

2008-02-18T11:43:00.001+09:00

The Korean obsession with all things coupley knows no bounds.I've previously expressed my disdain for kitsch couple T shirts, but that merely scratches the surface.

The sign above is for Yes, a chain store specializing in matching couple underwear, which you'll hopefully agree is several steps past "too far" and rapidly approaching the point where you can smell a strong whiff of bunny-boiling in the air. I don't know the origins of this but I'm inclined to blame the Beckhams'. I'm not sure what's scarier- the couple underwear or the notion that someone, somewhere would actually have a discussion like the one above with their significant other.

I've actually been meaning to take this photo for awhile now, but didn't want to be seen photographing a lingerie store in Bundang's busiest shopping district so I had to wait 'til Ruth was along to provide cover and social acceptability for the shot. Remember, 2 people = cute tourist couple. 1 lone white guy = a guest spot on the next KBS shock-umentary on evil depraved foreigners here to take our money/deflower our women/corrupt out social fabric.

Saturday Seoul stroll

2008-02-18T11:20:00.001+09:00

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. If you're gonna build a branch of your local generic-brand beauty shop, why not stick it right next to the one you're ~~blatantly ripping off~~ modeling it on.

Dressed to Kill - Eddie Izzard reigns supreme, even in Myeongdong.

The charred remains of Sungnyemun (Namdaemun) gate, now mostly surrounded by a protective hoarding as workers begin the long and intricate process of restoration. There was quite the crowd of onlookers gathered round to mourn the loss of one of Seoul's great treasures.

Speaking of fire, just how many of these bears do you reckon are less flammable than a truckload of Chinese cigarette lighters?

Finally, here's a pic of the newly finished Post office tower, which has been built to resemble either a massive V or the world's biggest zipper. Very, very cool.

Killer Queen

2008-02-18T10:45:00.001+09:00

The Queen musical We Will Rock You is currently showing at the Seongnam arts center, so Ruth and I went along on Saturday night to see it.

I'll admit that it could have been disastrous - musicals for me fall into two distinct categories- brilliant, and absolute tosh. Thankfully, We Will Rock You fell under the former of the two. It never took itself too seriously - kind of a Rocky Horror with less raunch- and used every opportunity to poke fun. The cast managed to throw in a few localized jokes, a nice touch considering that some of the English word plays probably went over the heads of the Korean audience, even with subtitles. Unsurprising really- I scratch my head to think how they could have translated "Shagalayo magnifico" (as the lead character Figaro is referred to in one scene).

The music itself.. well, it was Queen - nuff said! There was a live band providing the rock, riffs and rhythms, and the crowd even got in on the hand-clapping and arm-waving during We are the Champions and We Will Rock You.

Due south

2008-02-18T10:11:00.001+09:00

I found this documentary on Due South while looking around Youtube:

The adventures of the mild-mannered, terminally polite Mountie, Benton Fraser ("Thank you kindly!"); wise-cracking Chicago cop Ray Vecchio; and Fraser's deaf, lip-reading wolf, Diefenbaker, were a firm favorite in our household and I spent many happy Saturday evenings watching this show with my da.

This is a very memorable song from one of my favorite episodes, itself an implausible mix of Leslie Nielsen, Canadian nuclear terrorists and a carriage full of country-singing Mounties.

"I first came to Chicago on the trail of the killers of my father, and for reasons that don't need exploring at this juncture I've remained, attached as liaison with the Canadian Consulate." - Fraser

"He's so polite."
"He's Canadian."
"Oh, I thought he was sick." -- Mrs. Vecchio and Ray

You let a wolf save your life, and then you pay and pay and pay and pay. -- Fraser.