Hello All,

With the goal of developing services and programs for ‘Otherwise Successful Older Gay Men’ who are challenged with dating, I’m asking for your participation in a  very short survey.

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/XKXWCZQ

If perhaps you don’t identify as a Gay Man please consider passing this survey along to the Gay Men in our life; the guy at work; your admired  relative; or others in your life who’d be willing to participate.

Thanks,  Ronald

With the passing of well know and award winning author E. Lynn Harris this past week my thoughts run towards quality of live issues.   Given our own mortality, one would hope later not sooner, how do we spent out time?  The Twelve Step slogan “One Day at A Time” reminds us of the finite nature of our moments, hours, days, and span. And the goal of living this day, just this day, to it’s fullest.

All to often we hear, or state to others, “I’m so busy.  I don’t have enough time. When can I ever find the time to see you.”

The use of our time is about decisions.  Do you spend an evening watching some inane television…or worse yet, reruns of ‘Law & Order’ you’ve already seen three times?  Or is spending and hour on the phone catching up with two old friends giving them the quality time only you can offer a better use of your time?  Which do you want to choose?

Living ‘One Day at A Time’ means making choices.  Only you can decide how you’re going to enrich the lives of others, and thereby your own life.

Coaching Assignment:  List three ways in which you waste the precious time you have in one single day.  Any day will do, yet a weekend day might be a good place to start.  Then list three things you WILL do differently with each of those hours you choose to be filled with more quality.  Report back so we can explore your decisions further.

Are you drifting thru  live?  Or are you enjoying the quality of the swim with others?

Coach Ronald

ODAT

Email me

Books by E. Lynn Harris

E. Lynn Harris – Huffington Post

CBS Early Show Interview – Pam House Blend

E. Lynn Harris Official Website

It can often be very difficult to determine if a guy is gay, or if he’s even interested for that matter.

Here are just two of the techniques that work for me.  The first one is to pay attention to who he’s looking at.  If he is checking out the hot/cute/hunky/older/younger (you name it) guy across the room he may be gay.

Now if he is checking out the women with the big, hanging out of her shirt breastesses then he probably is not gay.

But then again even if he is not gay he may not be adverse to an invitation back to your place to see what comes up when you ask him is he wants to see your pet python, so to speak. (was that a run-on sentence or what?)

Secondly, if a guy holds eye contact for more then 5 seconds he may be gay. Most non-gay (read straight) men will not hold your gaze that long. If he does look you in the eyes for a long time he still may not be gay, but simple nearsighted. He may think he staring at a cute women with short blond hair, when it’s actually me, a cute guy with short blond hair. (devilish grin)

Now if he’s checking out my ‘more the amble package’ (ya, right), my bootee, or my smile he then may be gay or simple interested in seeing what else I have to offer.

Sometimes when I’m out and about I’ll wear a lil HRC equals sticker on my shirt.  Or a Tee with a gay related symbol on it.  Those who know the symbol know it as that of the  (Human Rights Campaign ) a national gay lobby group and assume that I may be gay too. It does open up the door for some interesting conversations.

Those are my rambling thoughts and musings.  Care to add a comment or two about your use of your GayDar?  Please feel free to do so below.

The importance of connection, friends, family, buddies, and the like cannot be overestimated. We all need to have support and give that same support to those around us who are important to us.  If one is lonely and staved for attention and/or affection it may be a result of not giving the same to others.  Ya think?

Who are you standing by, supporting, listening to, or simple being there for?  Is ‘quality time’ part of what you share with others?  Sometimes we can be so distracted by our text messages; checking email on our phones; looking at someone other then the one we’re with that we are not giving of our time.

Reach out to them today and let them know you are there for them. Let them understand how important they are to you. Stand by them in that special way only YOU can.

Coaching assignment:  Make a list of three people you’ve not connected with or given any time to in the last 30 days.  Give them a call, send them an email, or simple connect in some way.  Offer, with specific detail, to meet with them.  Please report back your results in the comments section.