I thought that after my last big post I should write a little about what’s happened between now and then.

Some of the news is sadly a little disappointing – due in large to financial reasons, I didn’t start at uni this year. I will however do everything within my power to start next year instead. There just wasn’t enough time between making the decision and being able to plan financially for it. I’m not a single woman, nor am I a wage earner, and above all I have a teenage daughter currently going through college and hoping to go on to uni. I’m pretty sure she’ll get there, being the bright and determined young thing that she is, and that most definitely takes priority. That and the current job market being far from lively in recent times means our finances will be strained for the next couple of years. In a nutshell, I’ll still go ahead with it but it’s taken a backseat for now.

In the meantime, I’m busying myself with other things.

I have, as usual, many ideas for online projects. Most of which will never see the light of day but there’s one I hope to launch by the end of November, hopefully in the next couple of weeks. I’ve been procrastinating about it for a while, now it’s time to get on and do it. Don’t get too excited, it’s probably of little interest to the few people who read here but I’m hoping it will appeal to a number of others. If not, well nothing ventured nothing gained. One of these days I’ll strike upon an idea that actually works out, I’m very much hoping this will be it!

I’ve also been more involved with my local LUG (Linux User Group) and was appointed caretaker of the website and forums. Unfortunately since I contracted swine flu in August I seem to have gone down with every darn bug floating around out there and therefore have missed a lot of meetings in recent months. Luckily that doesn’t stop me from carrying on with the web side of things, but I hope in future I can be a bit more in touch with the group by actually getting to the meets! It’s come on in leaps and bounds since I first joined and it’s great to watch the group getting bigger and stronger.

A couple of weeks ago I had one of the best weekends ever when my husband Carl and I attended LugRadio Live and OggCamp. Not only were both days packed full of fantastic talks (and the odd comedy sketch!) but I also got to meet some people in the flesh for the first time who’ve become very dear to me over the last couple of years. People that I originally met on Jaiku, and some who I know through Linux Outlaws (which is hosted by Fab and Dan whom I originally met online through Jaiku). There are too many to mention really, but you guys know who you are – it was an absolute pleasure and meeting you all totally made the weekend complete!

I also stood very close on several occasions to somebody whom I respect for many reasons (not least because he’s a metal god!) – Jono Bacon. Like a pitiful fangirl however, I was far too shy to actually say hello to him. I’m not good at small talk anyway, I’d probably have gushed like a complete idiot (I probably did that to a few people over the weekend, sorry if you were one of them!) so it was perhaps a good thing that I didn’t introduce myself. :)

All in all it was a fantastic weekend. I was sad to hear that it was the last LugRadio Live, as it was my first, however I’ve heard whispers of another OggCamp next year. I certainly hope so, I thoroughly enjoyed it as I know everybody else did. Considering it was the first year it was held I thought it was presented exceptionally well. A huge congratulations to the Ubuntu UK Podcast and Linux Outlaws guys on your success, it was a job very well done. Oh, and your mugs were also an astounding success with me. I have personally road tested them with both tea and coffee numerous times since the weekend they were bought and they are now favourites amongst my huge mug collection. :)

Last but not at all least – I’ve stopped smoking! I’ve done so with the aid of an electronic cigarette – I can’t sing the praises of these little (or in my case mostly not so little) devices enough. I’m almost on day 90, and I’ll be publishing an article dedicated to the subject on that day in celebration. This post is already too long for me to delve into that subject here, so I’ll just leave you with this – after being a pack a day smoker for almost 21 years I am now smoke free. Not only that, but it was a completely painless process. I’m still amazed at how easy it was. If anyone at the LugRadio / OggCamp weekend wondered what that strange thing hanging out my mouth was, now you know. Sorry to disappoint if you thought it was some strange kind of illegal drug delivery device. ;)

Stay tuned for more….

PS I realise there were far too many smilies in this post but I won’t apologise for that, I don’t care how unprofessional it looks, this was a personal post. So there. :p ;)

First of all, I warn you this is likely to be a long post. Hey, I haven’t posted here in a while, this one makes up for that! Also, it’s very late, so apologies for any grammatical errors and / or waffling.

At 3am this morning, I made a life changing decision. I’ve had a rough couple of years with one thing and another, and I’ve been drifting instead of living. That’s slowly begun to change in the last couple of months and I’m gaining back some of the confidence that’s been knocked out of me. Believe me when I say that that’s actually quite a big thing for me. I’m coming out of years of depression, really, finally and properly coming out of it, not just ‘in remission’ as it were. And I’m coming out kicking and screaming!

Oh yes, the lifechanging decision. I should probably tell you what that decision was. I’ve decided that, during what is now my 35th year on this planet, I’m going to go back to uni to study creative writing. It’s something I have a huge passion for and have dabbled with on and off since childhood. Various things have prevented me from walking that path, which I won’t go into right now (otherwise you’d still be reading this next week!), but it’s time for change. To coin a phrase, ‘I feel it in my bones’.

With 16 years of the most important job I will ever do behind me (motherhood), it’s time to pursue something for myself. I’m incredibly proud of my daughter, who has turned out to be this wonderful bright, caring, studious, focused and good looking young woman (I honestly couldn’t ask for more in a daughter). I want her to be able to say she’s proud of me too. Of course she’s not the only reason I’m doing this, but she’s certainly a big part of my inspiration. As is my husband, who has supported me through every twist and turn of our 13 years together.

Speaking of inspiration, I have to give special mention here to Father Luke. This is a guy who has an obvious passion for writing, and is a sheer pleasure to read. He’s an inspiration not only because of the quality of his writing (and it really is high quality in my opinion) but because of his sheer determination.

Dear Father Luke, if you happen to be reading this, your passion and commitment to your writing is exemplary. Though I’ve been out of touch for a while now, I’ve seen you write through ups and downs, through homelessness, through heartbreak (or at least what appeared to be heartbreak) and all the other shit that life has dealt you, and still you’ve come out of whatever situation with your passion intact. That, my friend, is quite a sight to behold, and the mark of a true craftsman. I learnt today that you are studying to be a teacher of writing. I have no doubt you will succeed, and that your future students will be incredibly lucky to have you as their mentor. You are one of the best poets I’ve ever read, and a massive inspiration to me!

Back to my reasons for wanting to do this. I guess there are lots, but the main reasons are:

• To realise a lifelong ambition.
• To gain back some self respect and confidence.
• To feel as though I’m somebody my daughter and husband can be proud of, as I in turn am proud of them.
• To make my mark, no matter how small.
• To try and make myself a better human being. None of us should ever stop trying to do that.
• To have some goddamn fun! I love the act of writing!

And so here I am, an email drafted ready to be sent to the creative writing programme director (I’d better not send it at 4am, that wouldn’t make a good first impression) and the application form downloaded to my desktop. I’ll fill that out as soon as I hear back from the director.

I feel like the rest of my life is about to begin. I am both terrified and incredibly excited.

Sorry, this is just a test, nothing interesting to see here. :)

I’m part way through the implementation of a new blog. Yes, I know I do that fairly often and then abandon them, but they have been personal pleasures whereas this one will be a more professional project. One that I’m serious about and that I hope to make a little cash from.

Of course the first thing that springs to many peoples minds is the Google Adsense programme. However with the global economy being the way it is currently I’ve been reading on lots of blogs that this model is no longer profitable. Companies are tightening their financial belts and therefore cutting back on advertising spending, or at least looking at alternative methods which give them better value. The other downside to Adsense is that I think it provides little value to readers. Yes I know they’re supposed to be context sensitive but very often they’re not. Plus, a lot of people use ad blocking scripts these days so it’s kind of a moot point anyway.

The other obvious choice is affiliate advertising. I have no experience at all with this so I can’t say whether it works or not but I have heard it’s successful for many people. The great advantage with this is that it enables you to pick and choose affiliates that are highly relevent to your topic, and therefore your readers.

Affiliate advertising is a strong contender for me but I wonder if there other ways of gaining income for a new blog. When I say income, I’m not expecting fortunes. At least not to begin with, say for the first 6-12 months. My expectations regarding finance are very rough and although I will be working hard I’m seeing my initial outing into the world of professional blogging as kind of experimental. If within 6 months I can start making enough to pay the hosting bill with a little extra left over I’ll be happy. Anything over that I’d regard as a bonus.

Which brings me to my last choice.

I could not have any advertising at all, and take an ‘open source’ kind of approach, in the hopes that I may gain some paid blogging jobs elsewhere as a guest poster or regular contributor. I can see some problems with this though. Firstly, I could work my ass off for months and months with no gain at all. Secondly, if I allow my content to be used elsewhere (even with a link back to source) it might massively hurt search engine rankings. On the other hand I’m a big supporter of the open source ethos and I know it’s successful in many other fields, but I’m not at all sure how it would work with online content.

My research into this is ongoing, but I must admit I’m leaning more toward non-traditional methods. Times are changing and I think bloggers need to change and adapt with them. I’m just not quite sure how yet.

If you’re reading this and have any experiences to share, or know of anyone who has taken the open source model and adapted it to blogging, I’d love to hear from you!

Tuesday and Wednesday of this week have been spent at our old house clearing up the remaining junk before the eviction date. In sub zero temperatures (or at least it felt that way!). It’s safe to say it’s been freeeeeeeezing! I’m also trying to recover from a nasty cold which so far has been hanging on for well over 2 weeks. I’d almost got rid of it but spending a lot of time in a freezing cold house seems to have revived it. On top of that, I’m feeling very, very tired.

There is an upside though, I’ve found lots of things I’d long forgotten about or feared lost. Three precious things in particular – the wedding and engagement ring of my late grandmother and a ring that my husband had bought me for our second anniversary. I was over the moon to find those. None of them have much monetary value but a heap of sentimental value, so that made the whole thing worth it for that alone.

Sorting through the past years of your life is strange but good. I got all gooey sorting through my daughters old books, remembering which were her favourite bedtime stories when she was little and how she enjoyed the book of silly poems I used to read to her. And then there’s the old school reports which almost always say the same thing – she’s bright, does very well in every subject but especially maths, and is shy in class. Ah the memories.

I also rescued my collection of Enid Blyton books which I’ve had since I was 6 or 7 and passed on to my daughter when she was old enough. I’m hoping any future grandchildren will also appreciate them as we both did. Some things are timeless and worth holding on to.

Of course alongside the good stuff was a massive amount of junk to be thrown out. I’m not sure how we managed to keep all of that stuff in one little 3 bed terraced house! As much as it was a drag to do it all, the memories were worth reviving and it almost felt like a cleansing ritual.

No turning back now. After some harsh lessons, the future is beckoning.