Anyway, I hope I get my dollar’s worth out of this.

Here’s a picture of what my son looks like now. He’s 15.

zou tte, hana kuso arimasu ka.

boku wa kono hako no naka ni hana kuso wo hokan shiteimasu.

kono hana kuso wo anata no odeko de fuitemo ii desu ka.

dare ga ichiban nagai hana kuso wo torerun deshou ka.

kyou no yoru gohan wa hana kuso desu.

anata no hana kuso wo hojittemo ii desu ka.

boku no hana kuso wa shoppai desu.

futotteiru hito hodo, ase wo kakanain desu ne.

The other word for fat person, “debu,” isn’t very nice at all.

boku no pantsu kara pengin wo nukenakunatte shimaimashita.

nukenakunatte shimaimashita. nukenakunatte shimaimashita. nukenakunatte shimaimashita. nukenakunatte shimaimashita.

anata no pantsu wo boushi mitai ni kaburitai.

And the slightly dumbed down version:
僕、疲れた。 食べ物を変わりに噛んでくれるかい？

boku, tsukareta. tabemono wo kawari ni kande kureru kai?

“kai” is a more informal and friendly way of ending a question, instead of just plain “ka.” Or, if you use it improperly it could also be used to pick a fight, because it sounds like you’re talking down to the person.

boku wa chigau wakusei kara kimashita.

“As for me, a different planet from I came.”

boku wa ohiru gohan ni nezumi wo tabemashita.

BTW, the “wo” is pronounced “oh.”

boku no yubi wo nuite kudasai.

boku no onara no oto wa ookii desu. kiite mimasenka?

or

僕はおならの音が大きいです。聞いてみませんか。

boku ha onara no oto ga ookii desu. kiite mimasenka?

hayaku kyuukyuusha wo yonde kudasai. booringu no tama ni ashi ga hamatte shimaimashita.

*The reason why languages like Japanese and Spanish sound staccato is because every syllable is evenly timed. When you see vowels repeated as in “kyuukyuusha”, it means that the syllables take two beats. You might be able to notice how it sounds as if Tony says the word a bit slower. The same goes with “booringu;” it’s not “oo” as in “boot,” but rather an “o” as in “bowl” that is elongated.

I got up early this morning and put a few more episodes into the queue. For the time being, I’ll be releasing a new podcast every other day. I’m not sure when Tony and I will have time to record another one; my wife makes the kids do homework every night starting right after dinner until bedtime, so it might not be until next weekend. It’s a good idea have time to replay the older ones anyway so you learn them, right?

kore wa anata no akachan desuka? nandaka saru mitai desu ne.

I also bought Tony a little globe for him to learn where all the countries are that listen to us. Is anyone out there aware of how expensive globes are? Little ones about the size of a small melon cost US $30-50! It made me realize what an incredible bargain Google Earth is. I bought a wee little blow-up one for US $3. He now knows where Vietnam and Kuwait are. 39 more to go.

The reason Andy did one of the podcasts last week was because he had an all-out, no-holds-barred, poo-flinging temper tantrum when he thought we were excluding him. We recorded it after he calmed down, and I guess he decided it wasn’t for him. He hasn’t asked to do another one. If wants to do another one in the future, I’ll have Tony write down the translation beforehand and Andy will just read it. He’s never been as bilingual as Tony. Gotta get back into the habit of reading bedtime stories with him.

My wife listened to all the episodes. I could tell by the look on her face that she’s wasn’t thrilled with the content. That’s OK. It’s 10 year old boy humor, not mommy humor. But still, she’s very proud of Tony for being able to come up with dead-on translations. They’re not word-for-word exact translations, but rather he’s able to convey the tone and feeling of the original English better than anyone I know. It’s an amazing talent and he does it without even thinking.

boku wa anata no ocha ni oshikko iremashita.

ohayou gozaimasu nakamura-san. anata no neko wo tabete shimaimashita. oishikattta desu yo.

boku no noumiso ga itai desu.

boku no sukina tabemono wa saru no noumiso desu.

anata no oshiri wa dekkai desu ne.

あなたが入ったお風呂の水が飲みたいです。

anata ga haitta ofuro no mizu ga nomitai desu.

watashi no waki wo namenaide kudasai. kusuguttai desu kara.

• UNITED STATES 44.75%
• JAPAN 22.10%
• UNITED KINGDOM 4.97%
• GERMANY 4.97%
• AUSTRALIA 2.21%
• NEW ZEALAND 2.21%
• PORTUGAL 2.21% (Hello Ventura)
• CANADA 2.21%
• SWITZERLAND 2.21%
• ITALY 2.21%
• CHINA 2.21% (Tony was impressed)
• NETHERLANDS 2.21%
• SINGAPORE 1.10%
• SPAIN 1.10%
• FINLAND 0.55%
• BELGIUM 0.55%
• ISRAEL 0.55%
• REPUBLIC OF KOREA 0.55%
• ESTONIA 0.55%
• NORWAY 0.55%

I’m going to buy a bulletin board, a map of the world and some pushpins to show the boys just how far one tiny little voice can travel these days. We’d love to hear from you!

Also, I’ll let you in on a secret: This site is running on auto pilot. Episodes for the next week are already finished and loaded into the content management system, and every night at 7pm another one is set free. So I already know that the sound quality won’t be great for the next few days, and there are a few minutes of silence at the end of each episode. Next week’s episodes won’t have the same technical problems. (They’ll have different ones, probably.)

sumimasen, kono mentama wo  mitsuketan desukedo,  anata no dewa arimasenka?

dou shiyou. mata pantsu ni unko wo morashichatta.