you can have mermaid hair too!

Claudia Pedala does my hair a lot in the CNN/HLN makeup room- and I love it.
Here is a tutorial we made of her doing my hair.

Any questions?

No I’m not really Jodi Arias. I’m not a calculating cold blooded murderer. I’m not actually a stalker (facebook stalking is NOT stalking!).  I’m not, typically, a liar- oh puhlease like you’ve NEVER told a lie?!

I have pretended to like sports more than I like them for a guy. I have been a little bit nicer to friends of a guy I was into. I am a non drinker who has gotten a bit drunk to make a guy think I was “fun”.
I never converted to another religion for a guy… but faith and ideology can sometimes be fleeting when the big “I like him A LOT” feeling emerges.

What Jodi Arias did to Travis Alexander is unfathomable. And really…unforgivable.
I find myself repeatedly bewildered that someone could commit such a heinous crime and THEN behave the way she has in its aftermath.

I have NEVER, NOT EVER thought about killing someone. It is just not how I am wired.  I am very jelly belly when it comes to physically hurting another.
However psychological warfare?!
BRING IT ON!

I do recognize the intense emotional response to a guy who says “No!” or “No more!” or “I’m done!” or “We’re breaking up!”
I do recognize the intense emotional response to rejection.

I remember in my teens thinking about the crush who didnt like me back- how I wanted to devastate him emotionally somehow. That all of my smarts and efforts would go toward that endeavor.
Did I succeed? Nah. Something always stopped me short of being ruthless. But the feelings I had were unbelievably strong and powerful.
I wouldn’t ultimately hurt the guy who hurt me, rather I would turn the pain inward and blame myself for whatever had gone wrong.   I wasn’t hot enough. I wasn’t fun enough. My tush wasn’t small enough. I wasn’t good enough.

My way of dealing with a guy breaking up with me was, sometimes,  to put out even more than I had planned:

“Oh, you don’t want me anymore, then we will have sex! We will have really dirty crazy raunchy EXTRA naughty sex! You will like it! You will want it. You will want it again! ” (And he did. I’m not proud.)

And no, I would never damage his property, or his world.
But I might fantasize about it.

I recognize the DESIRE to stalk. I recognize the compulsion to try to make him change his mind.

And I would say with a boatload of confidence that MANY women recognize these things too.

I believe most women have a little Jodi Arias in them- and this may be, in part, why we are so fascinated with her crime.

I know one friend who called me 30 times, maybe 40, after a guy she liked blew her off. They had sex a couple of times. It was not a serious relationship, but her mental turmoil resulting was SERIOUS!  She could not stop thinking about him. He pushed every button (pun intended) and just when she finally let go- he re- engaged her.  My friend did not stalk this guy nor did she contemplate physically harming him- but her insides were all mixed up over him. It was intense.

One friend faked a pregnancy – for a LONG time- to keep a guy.

I have another friend who would wait each night for her guy to call her, after he’d been out with whomever, and they’d have late night bootie calls (this is in the 90s when it wasn’t called a bootie call). Anyway, she ended up marrying him.

Show me a girl who likes boys,  a woman who likes men and I will show you someone who has felt like Jodi Arias.

We just don’t usually kill the guy when it ends. We feel horrible. The emotional pain can linger- for years sometimes- but ultimately, the healthy girls,
we detach. We recognize it is enough and we move forward.

What was your “Jodi Arias” moment?

my mom loved my son jacob so much!

Tomorrow is the 5th Mother’s Day without my mom. I hate this day.

In my mom’s honor, here is an excerpt from the speech I gave at the JHE event last week.

“LOSING MOMMY:

I had this really cool radio show on siriusxm called whatever with alexis and jennifer, I was getting control of my body- probably because i was feeling happier and fulfilled.

Then my mother got sick and my whole existence changed.

During this time, I let my guard down and learned to be vulnerable. or was forced to be vulnerable. not sure which. But anyway,

Fall of 2007 my mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.

and for 9 mos, my sister and i would take my mom to her treatments, be with her after, take care of our kids and husbands, and in between all of this i would go to nyc and do my radio show and then shoot my first tv show.

My mom’s name was Bunny or Mommy. She was spectacular, super smart, gorgeous, funny, warm, crazy, demanding, unrelenting, naughty, fiercely loyal and fabulous.
I loved her so much.

From as early as I can remember my mom believed in my potential to do something great.
Now her version of great was maybe my being able to wear a bikini without a sarong (never going to happen!)

She also thought i could be a judge. Or a doctor.  Or president.
She had total faith in my brain capacity and personality,
little faith in my ability to regulate my body weight.There was not a single move i made that I wasn’t searching and wanting her approval.

My mom was of course the most loving mom mom to my kids, and mother in law to my husband.

My mom was my foundation.
She was my judge and jury.
She was my biggest fan.
She was my biggest critic.
She was the start of every day for me at 7am when she’d call my house and ask what i was doing…(what do you think im doing it is 7am!!!) She was the one I’d talk to most throughout the day.”

My mom died July 8, 2008.

And although she isn’t actually here anymore,
I am reminded of her each time I catch a glimpse of myself on TV.

THANK YOU MOMMY because  your influence and impact continues to show through every over the top facial expression I make.
They come from you.
And I am so grateful because I think they make people smile.
Just like you did.

I miss you.

Tomorrow is the 5th Mother’s Day without my mom. I hate this day.

xo
Jenny

4 oz brewed coffee (kcup, instant, french press- doesn’t matter!) (5-8 cal)
1 banana (100 cal)
1 cup of ice
1 cup of so delicious almond milk plus protein (70 cal)
1 scoop of JJ Virgin’s chai all-in-one shake mix (80 cal)
1 tbs cocoa powder (unsweetened) (20 cal)

put all ingredients in a blender, blend and drink! VERY filling. and YUMMY.

I  like sun warrior protein powder too.

The protein bars I’ve been eating are the Nut Butter Buddha bar and the GO FREE dark chocolate crunch bar.

The chocolate bars I LOVE are Almond butter and puffed quinoa from Hu Kitchen they can be ordered online HERE as of today!

My favorite cleanse/juice company is Love Grace Foods. Love!

Also a little too obsessed with annie’s strawberry “fruit” snacks and the ginger people’s gin gins…

back on Dr. Drew’s show tonight on HLN – here’s a picture of my “mermaid”  hair from two nights ago.

 
Leave any other food/diet questions in the comments.
xo
Jenny

I have plenty of lovely pictures from growing up: some thin, some chubby, some cute…enough.

1992, 1984, 1986!

 
But the super fat pics from past 10 years… ugh. I am mortified by them. #truth

This is why I get on my scale every day.
Seeing the number on my scale will prevent me from “not realizing” I’m getting fat/I have gotten fat.

Taking selfies also helps me stay aware.
OH!
Some tips on how to take a great selfie can be found at Pat’s papers!

Ricki Lake had me on as a guest on her show- talking about my weight loss, treadmill use and SoulCycle!
I’m grateful to have such a lovely well wishing girls’ girl friend! Ricki Lake is all good!
Watch and enjoy the fat pictures.

If you want to buy the surf shelf I mentioned:
go to Surfshelf and you can get $5 off by entering code jenny5 in the “Gift Certificate’” field on the 3rd page of your shopping cart at surfshelf and then hit APPLY CODE next to the field. The coupon will then appear as a (-$5.00) line item in the shopping cart with the text “$5 off from Jenny Hutt” -
THANKS SURF SHELF PPL!

I tweeted about a yummy chia pudding recipe from my cardiologist dr. yaghoobzadeh – here it is!
1/4 cup chia seeds
1 cup so delicious almond milk plus protein (he used coconut milk)
half a tsp vanilla extract
1-2 tbs agave syrup (depending how sweet you want it)
mix all in a container and put in the refrigerator for 3 hrs (I covered the container)
Really healthy and REALLY delicious!

xo
Jenny

P. S. Next week I am cohosting Dr. Drew’s show on HLN all week. I can’t wait!

And one more picture: prom 1988

xo
Jenny
p.s. Are you coming to hear me speak May 6?! 

p.p.s. Here is a link to my RAGE blog post I tweeted about.  Do I send this blog to this (horrible) doctor 4 years later? RAGE

Here is a recent CNN appearance from 4.12.13:

Additionally, I’m taking care of my (awesome) kids and my (tolerant) husband,  working out as much as I can and incorporating “Love Grace Foods” juices into my diet as often as possible (yum).  I’m certain that keeping my body the size it is now is essential to my over all well being!

I’m Staying positive and goal oriented despite moments of intense anxiety (gotta be me!).

And I am feeling really grateful that I have the opportunity to keep doing what I love.

Oh!
I’m thinking about doing my food diary on a regular basis again- do you want to read it?

xo
Jenny

p.s. I will be speaking in connecticut early may at the women’s auxiliary of the jewish home’s annual spring luncheon and boutique… please come if youre in the area! here’s the invite!

please come hear me speak!

Looking forward to speaking at the Women’s Auxillary of The Jewish Home Annual Spring Luncheon and Boutique  May 6, 2013 at The Waterview in Monroe, Ct.!
If you live in the tri-state area (or LOVE to travel) please come meet me and hear me speak!
xo
Jenny

This Jodi Arias case is insane- my lawyer’s brain was definitely engaged!

Also thanks to @totaltraffic network  in CA! Allowing me to use your (CLEAN!!!!) studio made me able to broadcast my Just Jenny radio show live.  Terry and Dona you rock,.

I also got to shoot (and hang, soul cycle & treadmill with ) @rickilake – she is such a good friend and lovely girl.
Looking forward to seeing what her next project will be…
What a week!
Happy to be home
AND it’s a snowday.
#forcedtorelax #happytorelax
xo
jenny