Jennifer Soldner

The Empathic Parent

2016-01-28T21:41:00.000-05:00

Intense Emotions of Parenting As an empathic parent, it is easy to find yourself drained and struggling with emotional separation day in and day out. Children have very little control over their emotional state and, while some may find their tantrum over receiving the red cup instead of the blue one as tedious and unimportant, the empathic parent feels the genuine level of emotion

Own Your Place

2016-01-22T15:15:00.002-05:00

Put yourself first. Seriously. Just do it. You have permission, you have the *right* to put yourself first. Can you imagine a world where everyone put themselves first? I think most conjure up this image of a large mass of individuals stomping over others to get to the top with no regard for anyone else's emotions, wants or needs. We think that if we put ourselves first then we are

The Misunderstood INFJ: Making Real Connections

2015-10-21T16:29:00.000-04:00

Does this sound like you? I have been learning all I can about being an INFJ and it is so relieving to know I am not crazy! But as I am learning more about myself, I want to help other people understand me too. Whenever I explain it, it seems like they just don't get it or they shrug me off. They seem to think they know me, but I still

I Define Me

2015-09-21T15:39:00.000-04:00

For quite a while, I struggled through life. I was surrounded by abusive people, day in and day out. I was unaware of my empathic abilities. I was hyper-defensive and unnecessarily judgmental. I was angry and I took things personally. After some intense life shifts paired with the realization that I am an empath, I continued to struggle. I was in this middle ground of self-awareness where

On Those Lonely Days

2015-09-02T09:00:00.000-04:00

Some days are harder than others. Some days you feel so alone, wishing there was someone you could connect with. Someone who could understand how you are feeling without needing to say a word. Empaths and intuitives view the world differently than others. Not better or worse, just different. On the difficult days, you can feel saddened that your lens is a different color than everyone else's.

Fabricated Protection of the Superego

2015-08-31T08:30:00.000-04:00

There are times when I get angry. Times when I am stubborn. Times when I am wrong. There are moments when I am selfish and unkind. There are areas in which I struggle. Things I attempt and fail...miserably. I am never the best and may sometimes even be the worst. What makes these pieces of me even more difficult is when people call me out on them. My first response is to throw up

Push the Bounds of Psychology

2015-08-27T09:00:00.000-04:00

Have you read The Empathic INFJ? It is a book I really enjoyed writing as it steps outside of the normal perception of what it means to be an INFJ and takes the reader a little deeper. While being an Empath may not be a popular concept, it was important to me to push the boundaries of what is comfortable in Myers-Briggs terminology in order to help those who perceive the world

Inside Your Head

2015-08-26T12:51:00.000-04:00

INFJs can spend a great deal of time deep inside of our heads. Some days it feels like hours go by as we are floating around in our minds, not accomplish much in the physical world. We appear lazy or sluggish. Sometimes we can become very hard on ourselves thinking of all the things we haven't accomplished but feeling overwhelmed because there is just still so much more to think about.

Am I Empathic or Bipolar?

2015-08-23T11:56:00.001-04:00

This page originally shared an article I wrote directed towards those who have reached out to me for help in the early stages of discovering their empathic abilities. When I receive enough inquiries on a subject, I take that as a sign that many others have similar questions, and so I attempt to assist those seeking help. A handful of individuals with Bipolar Disorder reached out to me and

Intuitive Wordview

2015-08-20T13:21:00.000-04:00

Some people have a level of intuition which can confuse and even frighten those who do not understand. These people experience life in ways science doesn't yet explain, making every day a battle to understand themselves and to hope others will understand them. Feeling alone and exhausted with seeing the world in a different way, they cope by denying who they really are and just trying to be "

You Are Right Now

2015-08-10T10:53:00.000-04:00

There is a very unfortunate stigma attached to transparency. By transparency, I mean sharing openly and honestly exactly how you feel or what you believe, whether it is positive or negative, deemed acceptable or unacceptable. We fear sharing our deepest thoughts because everyone around us is a critic. This leaves us feeling alone and ironically, leaves others who are in the same situation

Questioning the Answer to Why

2015-08-07T15:00:00.000-04:00

Recognizing Red Flags and Abuse Tactics I have always been the type of person to ask questions. I crave knowledge and understanding. I live for truth and transparency. My favorite question has always been and will continue to be "why?" "Why" is a very powerful and telling question. It seems like it would be simple. You ask why and someone gives you the reason. And yet, there is a

INFJ: The Special Snowflake

2015-08-05T22:37:00.000-04:00

There is a saying I have seen tossed around lately called the "Special Snowflake Syndrome." This syndrome seems to be used by one to describe another who feels they are "special" in some way. Often, the phrase is loaded with disgust or judgment, indicating simply that the other is, in actuality, no more special than anyone else. This phrase has been used by many to describe INFJs. Usually

A Moment to be Very Real

2015-07-31T15:50:00.001-04:00

I am going to be completely honest for a minute. I am exhausted. Completely and utterly wiped out. And it is probably only for that reason that I can toss aside any anxiety (and probably decent grammar) and write out this article. I have written before on Social Anxiety. It is a cruel, heartless liar that resides within my head. It taunts me daily and wears me down. It holds me back in

The Difference Between Intuitive and Empathic

2015-07-09T12:37:00.003-04:00

The terms intuitive and empathic have become synonymous for some, causing confusion about what each actually means. It is incredibly important to note the differences in order to fully understand your level of intuitive or empathic abilities. Intuitive, as the name suggests, is looking inside of oneself. It is turning into your own person to

Grounded and Soaring

2015-04-16T22:54:00.002-04:00

Who Is Unhealthy?

2015-04-09T09:47:00.001-04:00

The Invisible Line Between Neurotic Behaviors and Healthy Coping Skills The term "unhealthy" is used quite often when it comes to how people function in day-to-day living. Just this morning, I encountered the word three times in my research. Many times it seems appropriate, especially as I browse information on mental illness and therapy. I

I Think You Mean Closed-Minded

2015-04-06T10:08:00.000-04:00

I am an extremely judgmental person. Very few moments go by in the day when I am not passing judgment on something. Those leftovers? I think they've turned. Your new shoes? I adore them! Schools? Prisons. Gay marriage? Go for it. The sketchy looking guy at the mall? I think I'll go walk over here instead. Judge. Judge. Judge. I am full of them. So are you. It is a sign that you are

Joyfully Staring...

2015-02-12T09:04:00.001-05:00

My Fear-Based Choice

2015-01-30T09:21:00.000-05:00

I do not vaccinate my children. What thoughts come to mind when you discover that? Rage? Fear? Confusion? Compassion? Understanding? What thoughts jump into your mind? She must be an uneducated person who thinks they cause autism. Obviously she just follows the media hype and the Jenny McCarthy crowd. How can she be so selfish? Clearly she just wants the "Natural Mommy" stamp. I hope

The Problem with "Good Touch, Bad Touch"

2015-01-29T10:38:00.000-05:00

Teaching our children the differences between "good touch" and "bad touch" has been preached about for quite some time as a means of protecting those children from possible sexual abuse. It sounds good and makes a great deal of sense to the parents. Good touch referring to hugs, kisses and gentle brushes meant out of love and bad touch means touching any private areas. Sounds simple and

When Shame Has No Power

2014-12-24T15:39:00.000-05:00

I have been thinking a lot lately about the different paths to personal discovery and self-improvement. The continuous stream of emails, comments, reviews and connections from readers keeps me aware of the many different places we each are in life. It is no secret that everyone is in their own place on their own journey, yet I feel as though this notion is pushed far back in our brains rather

I'm a Real Woman, Too

2014-11-18T16:15:00.000-05:00

Well, I recently saw the latest article circulating reminding me that I am not "normal." It was a very thorough account of what a normal house with children looks like. The woman is a mother to 3 boys under the age of 5 and she lists all the aspects of her home that are clearly the norm and ensures that anyone who does not fall in that list is lying, trying to guilt other mothers or, my personal

Parenting an Empathic Child: Tips for Recognizing and Coping With an Empathic Child

2014-05-23T19:12:00.001-04:00

Recognizing an empathic child can be quite a challenge, especially if you are not an empath yourself. Often times their abilities go overlooked and they are left to cope with overwhelming emotions and a lifetime of feeling broken. When we as parents are able to recognize the signs that our child may have empathic abilities, we can set them up for a lifetime of wholeness and success, despite

How to Deschool So You Can Unschool

2014-05-23T12:37:00.000-04:00

Unschooling can be a difficult concept to wrap one's mind around, especially if they have not yet "deschooled." Since most people spent their youth traditionally schooled, whether within schools walls or homeschooled with a curriculum, it is hard to comprehend what life without school would be like, let alone attempt to live it. The