I Am Jessica Cha™

Jesus H. Christ

2013-05-09T17:43:00.001-04:00

So, I've had a lot on my plate lately. Between moving to downtown Charleston, trying to find a better job, being in a relationship for the first time in a long time, trying to get my car fixed, running The Charleston Underground, and trying to catch up on my bills by selling things most precious to me--I really don't have time to stop and breathe.

I don't get paid for The Charleston Underground stuff, none of us do. (Just in case you dont know, we are one of the sole news sources for covering all art/entertainment/nightlife in the capitol city, Charleston, WV...) We are stretched pretty thin, and really, there are only two people running the whole shebang. Myself and Renae. And out of the two of us, only one has a reliable vehicle. So you can imagine how difficult it can be, especially when your two key staff members live 45 minutes away from each other.

Running back and forth to all these events and to pick up staff members--and we don't get a dime from anyone. We are doing all of this for no monetary reward. Would it be nice to get paid for the hard work we do each and every day? Absolutely. But even if we got paid, it would still be an unbelievable workload for just two people.

We're getting burnt out. That's the cold hard facts, people. We need more SERIOUS people to join us and cover the events, but really there is no incentive. You do work, sometimes people thank you for it. That's about it. Someone posted today on CHUG's FB that it seemed like Renae was playing favorites with bands. To some, that might appear to be true, but the simple fact is, the bands that want covered pick her up and bring her to the show so she can cover it. I, myself, tend to only go to Empty Glass Open Mic, and that's bc I only have Mondays and Tuesdays off from my PAYING job, and my boyfriend runs the open mic, so i go down, spend time with him, cover the open mic while Im there and call it a day.

So if people would stop being accusatory for five minutes, and even, I dunno, spend a day with our staff.. you would see how insanely stretched we are. We have 20 different shows to go to, 20 stories to write and 20 events to photograph/video. There's two of us and we don't get paid. Show a little patience and appreciation for us as we try to get everything together in an orderly fashion.

That's not to mention our food reviews (which we pay for out of our own pockets, when we do them) and our contest prizes, which we usually pay for out of our own pockets as well. The only reason we do this is because we love music, art, entertainment and the like -- and we want to see our Charleston be the best Charleston it can be. We want to see our musicians become famous, our artists become celebrated around the globe, our performers to be the most watched thing on Youtube. We do this for you guys.

We thought about putting together a festival, but we had to push it back due to funding. We're probably going to do a kickstarter/indiegogo project for it and hopefully you guys can help us help Charleston's scene.

So with all that being said, I just want to let you guys know that we're still here, still working and still trying to bring you what we can with just the two of us.

If you would like to join our team, call 323-744-0723 - that goes directly to my phone.

Overworked and Underpaid,
Jessica Cha

Free/OBO (Officially Burnt Out)

2013-01-18T23:40:00.002-05:00

This blog is going to be short. I'm just frustrated for so many reasons and I have nobody I can talk to about it..

I developed a secret language when I was 14 so nobody could read my diary. I'm about to write everything I'm feeling on a sheet of paper, take a picture and post it here. At least then I will feel like I vented. It's not my fault you can't understand my secret language..

Cray Cray Craze.

2013-01-17T20:20:00.001-05:00

We're all going crazy.

I love this blog. I love to have a place to say the things I deem necessary without having to bore the people who don't really care what I have to say.

I've been working on a new project lately and it's been draining me emotionally, financially and physically. I fell for a guy who is too complicated to fall for, which put me at a stalemate. I made a few new friends who I already foresee being good friends. I've been networking like my life depended on it and now I know everyone from bands/directors/actors/writers/artists to the guy who owns a taco truck downtown. Not a portable brothel but an actual taco truck.

So that's the synopsis of the last month. Cliff notes, if you will. I've been thinking a lot lately, and every time I do that "thinking" thing I tend to get annoyed with myself more and more.

I was a complete jerk last night to someone. I apologized, but I still feel like a jerk. I let all of my recent frustrations just build and build and poor N. got the brunt of it. Everyone I know has been super stressed lately and I think we're all edging, but not in the good way. We're all wading in the deep end of the pool and our arm floaties keep getting closer and closer to our wrists.. and if we don't learn how to grow gills we're all gonna drown, pulling the others down with us. I don't like drowning. It's not really my thing. I'd prefer not to, if I can help it.

So how do we make like Kevin Costner? Been thinking about it a lot and honestly, communication is the only answer that really comes to the forefront.

If you can communicate how you TRULY feel about something (not how you feel at the "moment of impact".. it's better to give it a cool down period before you make the mistake of being hateful and talking out of your ass) but if you can openly and honestly communicate your feelings and the other person can do the same, then I feel like you can take on any change.. welcome it even.

So what do you do when someone fails to reciprocate the honest communication? Drop them like a hot potato and keep moving forward. Anyone who can't communicate with you is essentially holding you back as a person. If they can't for whatever reason, be an honest communicator (ie: plays games, holds you at bay, tells white lies, tells big honkin' black? lies... whatever) then they are not helping you become a better person.. well, they may be, but that really depends on the strength of your resolve. I'm an obstinate person. "Tell me I can't and I'll show you I can" type. I'm the chick you don't challenge. So if you prefer to learn the hard way (better known as the tedious and treacherous path of heartbreak, misplaced trust and loss of faith in humanity) then yes, they are helping you.. everyone needs a little heartbreak so they can appreciate the true love junk.. but not abusive and constantly terrible situations. That wears on you after awhile. So be the best version of yourself by surrounding yourself with people who can really stick with it, help each other through the sand trap and cheer once everyone has made it to the other side.

I'm gonna try to do the same.. but to do that I really need to restore my faith in humanity by placing my trust in another human being and hope they don't crush me with everything they've got.. and if they do, I'll keep going until I meet the exception to the rule.

Gah, I'm So Tired of It All.

2012-12-25T14:40:00.001-05:00

This started off as an angry rant. Then I deleted it to say this...

Have a little gumption. If you feel the need to say something, say it. If you decide it's better left unsaid, then keep it to yourself.

Don't impose your beliefs on others. Expect others to do the same.

Don't walk around telling other people to "smile" or "be happy" because you want them to be. You don't know what that person is going through and you have no right to tell them what to do with their body or emotions.

If someone tells you what to do with YOUR body or emotions, tell them where they can stick theirs.

If you feel something, let it out. It will consume you otherwise.

I suggest a blog like this one, where nobody actually reads the damn thing.

That is all.

CT Shootings, Facebook and Human Beings

2012-12-17T17:26:00.001-05:00

All the shooting stuff in CT was a tragedy, sure. But I'm not going to make my life about it. I'm not signing any petitions you guys send my way, so.. sorry in advance.

Some may see this as cold-hearted, but the truth of the matter is, if I stopped my life every time something bad happened, I never would have made it to my 17th birthday.

Do I feel sorry for the families? Sure. Do I think guns should be outlawed? Yes and no.. I think people should have to go through an entire process to own and carry a gun, including a psychological evaluation and a police-academy type training in the rules of use of force.. but criminals are criminals and they don't care about laws, so why bother to put more limitations on the ones who aren't out there committing crimes? I'm very torn on the subject and could debate myself here forever.. so I digress.

There is nothing we can do as a society to control things like this. Until human beings evolve enough to get that animalistic wild side bred out of their genes and become docile, we will continue to do terrible things to other people.

Also, I really debated unfriending all the bible thumpers over the last week and this is why.

First of all, the US is one of the most "Christian" nations in the world and we have over 10,000 gun related deaths each year. As compared to say, Japan who weigh in at a whopping 48 gun related deaths a year. Only about 10% of Japanese are "Christian."

If you live in America, you believe in the Constitution. If you don't, then you should probably leave. But I'm willing to bet more of you know "John 3:16" than the Preamble. That's sad. Where is your real world application?

I do believe in the Constitution. I believe in the separation of church and state. I believe that no matter which way you cut it, any religious teachings at a young age should be considered BRAINWASHING.

If you can't take the time to really (and I mean REALLY) think about this (not hiding behind bible verses or telling me why your religion dictates my need to go to hell), please unfriend me now. I don't need any fanatics in my life.

Putting "God" back in schools will only do one thing. It will make your children a little dumber. It will teach them to not figure out the world on their own. Although there is some intelligence to be found in having blind faith, it's not the kind that will make bad things stop happening. That only comes from applying yourself to the real world. So stop getting on your knees and "praying" and waiting for some magical dude in the sky to fix all your problems and go fix them yourself.

If I offended you with any of this, maybe you should take a good long look at yourself and ask yourself why. People tend to lean toward the dramatic side of things when defending their beliefs and it's an understandable stance to take.. but once you filter through all the brainwashing and really survey yourself, you might actually learn something about who YOU are, not who your religion tells you to be.

I wasn't raised as a Christian, but I attended Christian churches the majority of my childhood because I liked the people and the joy. Then I started studying theology and I realized that there were enough borders set up between human beings already. And all they do is divide us and make us passionately defensive which often turns to hatred. If something can make you hate someone, just because they're not the same as you.. you have a problem.

This is why I didn't unfriend anyone this week. I understand where your hearts are at, I understand why you are trying to sympathize at every turn, etc.. and because that's the way you feel like you need to be for whatever reasons, I respected that and went about my day.

I'm just not a person of "Facebook sympathy" and I don't care to wallow in the sadness with you all. Death is something that happens to us all, young and old.

The grieving process is one of the hardest things to cope with.. anyone who has ever lost a loved one or a relationship unexpectedly knows that. So take your time to grieve if it affected you badly enough to do so, but please don't drag the rest of us into the eddies so we can drown with you.

I believe in love. Love for fellow living creatures, love for the earth, love for knowledge and love for the things we can't understand. That's all part of the human experience. So when things get you down, re-center yourself on love.

End of the World - Mayan Diet at IHOP

2012-12-16T20:06:00.000-05:00

So last night after work, I swung by the mall and picked up my roommate. About two miles down the road, she offers, "You know, if you wanted to swing by McDonald's, I could get us something to eat.."

To which I replied, "K, sounds good."

We pull up to McDonald's drive-thru (mind you, it's almost 1:00 AM) and we're waiting to order. We start looking over the menu and I blurt "Ugh I want breakfast.. We should say f&@% McDonald's and go to IHOP instead."

"Omigod, yes, let's do it." Chelsea replies.

So as soon as we pull up to the microphone box to order, we pull out and head to IHOP. On the way there, we reminisce over "that time we cooked a pound of bacon and ate it with my dog" and how much we can't wait to eat breakfast.

We walk into IHOP and are seated within 2-3 minutes and we ogle the menus for a good 15 minutes trying to decide what to eat. We both came to the conclusion that we wanted to eat everything there and after our waitress came back we ordered..

-Spicy Triple Meat Scramble
-Banana Bread French Toast, Hashbrowns, Eggs & Sausage
-Jack, Cheddar & Bacon Potatoes
-2 sides of bacon
-Apple Cinnamon Pancakes
-An Urn of Coffee
-Two Splashberry drinks

Chelsea is Angry Hungry!

Jessica thinks lollipops should be made of bacon.

About halfway through.

Defeated by pancakes.

Bacon in one hand, sausage in the other. #Winning

Last bite of the scramble.

So full of food my blood pressure went up. (See: vein in forehead)

Chelsea's "food baby" afterward.

So the moral of the story, kids. Eat as much as you can before the world ends next week. If it doesn't end, then at least you lived like it was your last week on earth once in your life.

Plug Me Like Toasters.

2012-11-24T18:41:00.001-05:00

Hello again my fellow inmates.

So today I wanted to talk about why I dislike (most) humans and introduce you to a few projects that I really think you should check out.

First off, meet Chainsaw Republic. Chainsaw Republic is a metal band, but they are also more than that.. they are revolutionary thinkers and they're a great group of people that I'd consider friends. I've known a few members of this band since I was 14 or 15 years old, so basically half my life (seeing as I'll be 29 in March)...They just got out of the studio, recording their new single, "American Dope" and they're about to go back into the studio for their next song "Beat Me Like Jesus".. I've even signed on to be their concert dominatrix. If you come to their show, I will whip you :)

Now you may be wondering why I'm introducing the band right now, but there are several reasons. You need to know reference points for the back-story to make sense. You need to understand my affiliation with all parties involved and see this for what it is.

Okay, moving on.

As you may know, I'm on Twitter quite a bit. I love Twitter. It's like mini-blogging in 140 characters. I don't have to sit here and write out an entire blog when I can vent via twitter with a simple "wtf people" tweet.. then if people care to ask me, then I may tell them.

So there is a person on Twitter who I've internet-known for quite a while. I'd say somewhere between 6 months to a year. His name is Licorice Nipples ( @LicoriceNipples ) He's a pretty cool guy, or at least, I thought so until last night. We had done a podcast together before and couldn't use it, so we'd decided to try it again. This time he was to interview me with Chainsaw Republic (http://www.chainsawrepublic666.com) and we'd planned this for Friday, November 23rd at 8 pm EST.

We don't know what happened with this guy, but we had gathered the entire band together to do an interview with this guy and he bailed on us with not so much as a "Sorry" or a "I cant do it tonight" or anything.

And now I can get to my first point. I hate people. If you're going to bail, have the balls to say so. At least tell a motherfucker why you're bailing. Did you not agree with a stance the person (or in our case, the band) takes on something? Did your girlfriend get her panties in a bunch and leave you for talking to someone more charismatic than her? What's the real deal here, Holyfield? Don't tell me you're going to do something and then not do it. Actually, let me clarify something here. You can let me down all you want. I'm okay with being let down at this point in my life. But don't let down my friends. Don't let down the people who put faith in you to do something. Be man enough (or woman enough) to tell it like it is.

This is why I don't form close bonds with humans. Humans will continuously let you down, I promise. 99 times out of 100. This is why I do not show sympathy to people with failed relationships. This shit happens. You don't communicate, you ignore facts because you want to be loved and you become jaded. I don't want to hear your pity party when shit comes crashing down. If I cared, you'd know. Don't tell me shit I don't care about.. because I will hurt your feelings.

Growing up as a child, I wasn't exactly allowed to speak my mind. I grew up with very strict grandparents and that wasn't going to happen. I was a child and had no right to speak for the joy of speaking. And I thank my lucky stars every day for that now. I brood on the things I need to say. I learned to hold my tongue and be patient. I learned to ask myself the three questions.. "Does this need to be said?"... "Does this need to be said BY ME?"... and "Does this need to be said by me RIGHT NOW?" and most of the time, the answer is no. I know quite a few people who STILL think it's okay to talk all the time like a rude child. People who stomp when they don't get their way.. People I would personally go back in time to abort if I had a time machine. Guess the moral of the story is this: Don't aggravate or betray people--you never know when they will acquire a time machine to abort you.

Okay, now that we've talked about time machines and I can't think of a segue into my next talking point right now, we're going to talk about scifi.

Battlestar Galactica, namely. Now anyone who knows me should know by now I am a complete nerd when it comes to BSG. I've seen the new series and the old series, played the online game, read BSG books, played the board game and even watched Caprica. Now there is a new series out called Blood & Chrome and I FRAKKING LOVE IT.

It's being broadcast over YouTube's Machinima channel for the time being and then it's rumoured to be picked up by Syfy if it gains enough momentum.

Now I have some super beef with "Syfy" that I won't being going into right now, but the name ought to tell you everything you need to know. It used to be Scifi, and now it's Syfy. It no longer is a channel for science fiction programming. Last year, on Fridays, their prime time spot was slotted for WRESTLING for frak sake.

Anyway, if you would like to watch Blood & Chrome I have posted it below. The great thing about this being in web-series format is that you can watch 5-10 minutes of it and see if you like it. Also, the time the story takes place is before BSG takes place, so you can feel free to watch this with no spoilers and see if you'd be interested in the "mother" story.

And with that, I bid you adieu. Watch some humans and cylons blow each other up. That's how I release stress. I watch amazing space battles. What's your stress reliever?

An Artist Retreat

2012-10-02T23:12:00.004-04:00

So, sometimes, it pays off to whine. I am not, by any means, condoning this terrible personality trait but sometimes it really does make a world of difference.

I was at one of my new favorite hangouts with my roommate Kitty, called The Empty Glass, and I was out on the patio talking to a few folks, S.D. in particular, when I happened to mention how bad I would like to go to a drum circle. Unbeknownst to me, there was one happening a week later and I was about to stumble upon an invite.

We (Kitty and I) were beside ourselves, waiting the week out, getting excited about this artist retreat we had been invited to experience. We really had never done anything like an artist retreat before and really had no idea what the experience would entail. With nervous excitement, the week passed in a flash and we found ourselves at the bar again, the night Kitty was performing with The Wayward Girls' School of Burlesque.

Once more, I found myself outside talking with random persons, and started talking to the guy, S.D. who had invited us to the retreat. He told me he had been having trouble deciding on who to invite, but really felt like Kitty and I would benefit the most from the event. I was super excited. He told us he would swing by and get us Sunday at 1pm-ish and we'd be spending the night at the retreat, leaving Monday afternoon.

Once we were all in agreement, we exchanged numbers and went about our night. The next morning I woke up, hopped in the shower and haphazardly shave my legs, woke Kitty up and we said goodbye to my dog and began our adventure.

First, we stopped at a local farmers' market and picked up some fresh food, hit the grocery store for some basics and met up with a local Art Group Coordinator, B.D. aka Mama D. We followed her for about 40 miles, got off the interstate and headed out to one of the most aesthetically beautiful places in West Virginia--Whispering Springs Haven.

Upon arriving, we were greeted by a gentle wave from a petite lady with a warm, welcoming face. We instantly felt at ease and at home. Kindred spirits can always recognize each other immediately. She introduced herself as Karen, the owner of Whispering Springs Haven. It was kismet.

We got settled and while S.D. and Mama D. cooked, Kitty and I took a walk around the property and just took it all in, getting used to the solitude. A light rain sprinkled over us and it was so quiet we could hear it patter off the leaves, the only other sound being the sound of birds calling out to one another, playing in the rain.

We had a delicious seasonal meal, prepared by S.D. and Mama D. followed by dessert. We all hung out for a while, discussing small business ventures for artists and our individual projects, waiting for the moon to show her brilliance.

Around 9:30pm, the sky finally cleared and the moon quietly watched us from above as we gathered drums, recorders, maracas and tambourines and sat in a circle outside. We took a minute to get centered in ourselves and then we did a healing circle for those we loved, some vocalizing their "prayers" while others, like myself, just let our thoughts flow, letting the circle of energy take our cares with it.

Afterward, we walked across the mountainside, to the fire pit and had a drum circle, shared stories, philosophies and experiences, drank some Amish chai tea and were just sated with the feeling of being. It was magical and natural and you could feel the perfection of the universe in this place. The pure solitude of this place was amazing. I really felt free. Free from harm, worry, stress, deadlines.. everything, really.

After Mama D. and Karen made their way back to the cabin (for lack of a better term) the three of us continued to talk throughout the night, stoking the fire with our toes resting along the firepit or in the sand surrounding it.. After our talk at the fire, Kitty and I went to bed, but stayed up having girl talk until early morning, then we finally fell asleep to the sounds of perfect peace.

Waking up the next day, we had another great meal and we volunteered to help Karen get a few things done around the house, since she had been so kind to let us come and free ourselves there, and somehow even chores seemed fun there.

It had begun raining again when it was time to leave and we really didn't want to go. This might sound silly, but a little part of me will always be there. I have never experienced the clarity I did while I was there and I just feel so much more like myself now.

Even if you're not an artist, per se, you need to do this. My reality has shifted because of Whispering Springs, and the loving and nuturing people who run it.

So, thank you Karen, Mama D and S.D. for allowing us the opportunity of a lifetime, and we can't wait to come home again. Our hearts are open and full of love and hope because you helped us see our full potential, not only as artists, but as people as well.

Xx

Willfully Falling Down the Rabbit Hole

2012-09-22T22:37:00.000-04:00

So as some of you may already know, myself and Charlee Roncaglione are writing a story. We have taken the bones of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and turned it into a psychological thriller. Picture: Alice in Wonderland meets..... Hostel meets hmmm.. John Wayne Gacy? no... more like BTK. You know, bind, torture, kill? The preacher guy... You'll understand better after you've immersed yourself in the story..

After a brief hiatus from our story, we had heard that Terrance Zdunich and Darren Lynn Bousman were going to be in our area, promoting their new indie film, "The Devil's Carnival: Part One" and I talked her into going with me. We rented a car from our airport and made the trek to Columbus; complete with coffee, donuts, beef jerky and car karaoke. Baaaad car karaoke. :)

And by the way, never let Charlee drive your car. She (albeit, successfully) managed to cross four lanes of traffic in two seconds, to make a left turn onto a busier road. And if you are under the impression that your cell phone can act as a GPS, you are as sadly mistaken as we were. Instead of telling us to make a right-hand turn, it took us left and onto the highway, then back off another exit, to a block from our point of origin. But enough about that.

We met Terrance and Darren that night, and they were such an inspiration to us both that we said to ourselves, "We have to finish this, we have to see this through." So here we are, trying to do just that. We are finishing up the story and are in the process of turning it into a screenplay with the help of the talented Chelsea Cook. We have a local metal band, Chainsaw Republic, who is going to be doing a lot of the music for the movie, as well as some other local talent who may or may not get involved. We don't have anything firm from them yet, however.

I also recently moved, and I am now living in the capital city, Charleston, in a cute bungalow style house with one of the local actresses here, Miss Kitty Killton, who so happens to be the actress playing our Alice/Mary once we start filming.

We also have Diab Dali playing the White Rabbit. Nothing else has been slated as of yet, but we do have some prospective talent that we've been considering.

But for now, let me introduce some of the people who are going to be working on the film.

Of course you know me, Jessica Cha.

And of course, Charlee Roncaglione.

photo credit - Kelly Rybarczyk

And then there is Miss Kitty Killton.

photo credit - Sean Rose

You also need to meet Chainsaw Republic and their lead vocalist, Diab Dali.

photo credit - Mary Lotshaw

And the woman playing Catherine. We're not disclosing her name yet, so you can't get a head start on stalking her. ;)

So there's a teaser. That's what we've been up to lately. We've been moving in to the new place and having meetings between all of the above, getting this thing on the road.

We hope to have a teaser trailer out by the end of the year. I'll try to keep you guys as up to date as possible, and hopefully once we get the teaser out, we can do a Kickstarter and get this thing funded a little more so we can get it ready to go.

So.

Are you stoked, yet?

As You May Have Noticed..

2012-08-22T03:10:00.001-04:00

..from my last blog entry, I got robbed.. well, my header and stuff for this site were stored on that computer that got stolen.. as you may have also noticed, they no longer show up as of today..

I will have to re-do the site again now, because it looks like whoever had stolen my computer has finally wiped it's memory. Probably reformatted the hard drive..

Not too happy about it, but new beginnings seem to be a thing for me, lately. Speaking of new beginnings, I have to tell you guys something that my amazingly frakkin' awesome friends did..

First off, let me start off by saying that I am not one to receive gifts. I feel strange accepting anything. I have never received many gifts in my lifetime, and if you ask anyone who is close to me and they will tell you that I am the person you dread getting a gift for, because I'm going to make a huge deal out of it and fight with myself whether or not to keep it.. I usually do, just because it's extremely rude to tell someone you don't want their gift.. plus I was raised to not ask for handouts, to obtain everything on your own, etc.

Soooo, I got robbed and was accessing the internet from my phone, re-upping my data plan every two weeks, just to keep in touch with everyone. Plus I've been working INSANE hours and trying to juggle that with keeping abreast with the police report and trying to write more of this story with Kristin (that after some major inspiration from two amazing filmmakers, Darren Lynn Bousman and Terrance Zdunich, we have to decided to continue and to make into a movie..)

So, I was awaiting some comics I ordered, so I asked my mother to check the mail for me in case they had shown up.. Now my friend Amanda had told me, like a week prior, to be expecting a package.. naturally I assumed it was coming from her, here in the States.

Well, my plans for the day were to go visit my adopted grandmother who had just gotten out of the hospital, then go with Diab Dali and DJ M6Sixty6 to scout filming locations.. (which by the way, my legs frakking HURT from hiking around in the woods all day in cheap flip flops.. next time, I am SOOO taking rain boots.. ANYWAY) So, I was on my way to the car when my mother phoned and said I had two packages. One from California, one from Canada.

Baffled already, I was like "huh?".. so she stopped by outside the house here, and took this huge box out of the backseat of her SUV along with a smaller white envelope containing the comics I had ordered from http://www.themoltingcomic.com and sat them on the hood of my car.

I knew what the comics were, so setting them aside, my attention went to the large box with the words "Laptop - Gift" written on the shipping slip. It was from my friend Mimi, in Toronto.

My mouth dropped open and I'm sure I looked stupefied. I was. I looked at my mother in disbelief and she goes, "Aren't you gonna open it to see what it is?" Apparently she didn't look at the shipping sticker.. I pointed to it dumbfounded, as if I was afraid to touch the box. Her jaw dropped too.. I started shaking a bit, trying to hold myself together, but honestly, my mind was reeling. My heart sank and leaped into my throat all at once. I was having a tough time even making words.. (this lasted for the rest of the day too, by the way)

"Do you have something I can open it with?" I ask, still in shock. My mother retrieves a key from her vehicle and helps me open the box.. I was trembling. I tried talking, but my emotions kicked my voice box in the taint and the golf-ball-in-my-throat took over. I pulled it out, looking for a note of some kind saying "Here, borrow this until you get one" or something, but there was nothing of the sort.. then I see a receipt with the registration numbers on it. It had recently been purchased.

I couldn't hold it back any longer and told my mother I was about to cry, and you could hear my throat tying in knots halfway through the sentence.

But I had to go on with the rest of my day, so I quickly placed everything back in the box, said my goodbyes and left for my grandmother's house. I added $10 to my account to call Canada and tried calling Amanda and Mimi on my way with no answer.. overwhelmed, I called Amanda back and left her a ridiculously long crying message about how I was speechless and thank you wouldn't even begin to cover it.. unfortunately I never got a voicemail option to leave one with Mimi, but Amanda played her message over Skype later so Mimi could hear it, which I am super grateful for, because let me tell you..

Mimi, Mario and Amanda orchestrated this whole thing.. and if the rest of the world had friends like I have, you guys.. we wouldn't even have war. If we did, they would be settled on late night over-caffeinated Skype conversations with someone sounding like a masterbating Wookie as the other two recorded it for hilarious blackmail.

I wanted to let myself settle down a little before I wrote this blog, mainly because, if I hadn't, you would have needed a babelfish to translate my gibberish.

On another note, I WILL get them back for this, eventually, somehow :)

To Mimi, Amanda and Mario: I love you guys. I still can't believe you missed me enough to do this, just so we could continue hanging out long-distance. I suck at thank you. Mainly because, like I said, blubbering in my message, this kind of kindness.. it doesn't happen to me. And yes, I know, you tell me to get used to it, but I never will. I don't expect anything from anyone, ever.. especially from those that I would do something like this for.. I'm astonished, to be honest, that there is another human being (let alone three) that care so deeply. Flabbergasted. I am still speechless.

As far as scouting, it went really well. My calves feel like they are another part of my body, trying to fuse back to the rest; they hurt so bad. If I have any advice for anyone shooting a movie, it would be to scout your own locations, so you can really appreciate the hard work it is going to take to get the job done.

We have two people for sure, casted, which are Miss Kitty Killton, a local stage actress who is phenomenal and gorgeous. She will be playing Alice/Mary. Also, Diab Dali, the lead singer of Chainsaw Republic has joined on as The White Rabbit/Reverend. If you haven't begun to read our story yet, I would suggest hopping over to the MUST READ section, because I am about to post the link there.

Anyway, I love you all very much and I appreciate you taking the time to read this blog, now that I can type it from an actual computer. Thank you again, Meemers, Mandapants and Masterbating Wookie. Opps, did I give it away? :D

xx jess

Robbed, BDSM & HTML

2012-08-03T13:12:00.000-04:00

Okay, so I am quite literally typing this from my cell phone. In HTML.

Lucky I know it, I suppose.

Why from my phone, you ask? Because yours truly was robbed.

So I do not have a computer at the moment, waiting on the police report and th insurance claim.

I DID have an amazing time at The Devil's Carnival, such a great time that I'm not even going to do it the injustice of being a blog entry from my phone.. so more on that at a later date.. one where my man-sized digits aren't trying use this tiny android keyboard in vain.

Anyhow, I'm gonna have a slow day at work today, so feel free to email me.

jessica(dot)m(dot)cha(at)gmail(dot)com

So, I will speak with you later my friends. Xx

The Devil's Carnival

2012-07-08T13:54:00.003-04:00

Ok, so those of you who know me, know I'm an absolute weirdo. :)

That's what makes me completely awesome though, so I'm willing to forego some "wtf is she thinking" looks from the passersby, because what do they matter anyhow.. they won't be there when I die. Their looks make no difference to me.

Anyway, I was lying in bed last night, listening to this song:

That song is from The Devil's Carnival (by Terrance Zdunich and Darren Lynn Bousman) which I am going to go to on 01 Aug 2012 in Columbus, OH. SUPER excited. I don't know what I'm going to do or say when I finally get to meet TZ. I will probably stand there like an idiot, say something he's heard a million times and I'll be forgotten two minutes later. I like making impressions. I like being remembered, even if it IS because I'm the only cornstalk amongst a field of daisies. At least corn is productive. :P

So anyway, there's something about Terrance and Jessica's voices lulling me to sleep with that song made me think about death and being forgotten. Oh yes. I do that a lot. I probably think about death at least 2 or 3 times a day.. normal? For me, yes.

I don't want to be one of those people who just find solace in religious beliefs. What will actually happen to THE ME of me, when I die? I don't want to say it's a soul, it might be.. but it also may be just synapses firing off in this brain of mine.. how do I know? How does anyone actually know?

We can't. So lying under my heavy blankets like a dead-body-chalk-outline I think to myself, if I disappear completely, if I just cease to exist in the whole of the universe, what should I do with my life now? Is this time precious? Will there be more? Will I wake up across the universe as something alien to me now? Does my energy just end up in a star somewhere?

Just some thoughts to stir you. Don't blow off death as if it were already answered. It's not.

Human beings do not like the idea of not existing. They've made up all sorts of tales about the afterlife to be sure of a continued existence, however bleak. Even in a religious "worst case scenario" you still exist, even if it IS in hell.. or purgatory.. or wherever.

What if you're dying, and as your last brain synapses fires, you just stop existing. You no longer have conscious thoughts. You just stop.

Doesn't anyone else kinda have a mini panic attack at the thought of that? Or does everyone ignore it, as if it never has to be faced?

It drives me mad sometimes. If the thought of this doesn't invade your mind from time to time, what is motivating you to go out and do good things, to leave a legacy?

If I have to stop existing, I at least want to be remembered. Nobody wants to be forgotten.

**If you plan on watching Battlestar Galactica, PLEASE DO NOT watch this next clip, because it's part of the finale and it WILL ruin the show for you**

If something in that video doesn't just rip your heart out and shred it, I don't understand why. No matter how many times I watch it, I always try not to cry. I feel like Starbuck (Kara) in that scene. And something always nags me about that pigeon in the last scene. Do you come back? Was that her, going back to see him?

The world may never know.

But until then, in the short time that this life offers, I want to take a risk. Nobody is going to remember the person who is afraid to do things. People will remember the ones who faced life fearlessly, did things that others were afraid to try.

So today, take a chance. No matter how minute. Smile at that guy you like and give him your number. Tell someone to eat a dick. I don't care, but do something today that will be memorable.

People don't tell stories about the uneventful. Make your life eventful and something people will remember for a long time. Don't just sit back and let it all pass you by. Because if you do, there's a good chance you will be forgotten.

Nobody, even you, wants to be forgotten.

A Hard Days' Night

2012-06-02T04:13:00.003-04:00

Been having a rough time lately folks, sorry I haven't updated in a while. I had surgery, still in stitches, actually. There have been so many things going on in my life lately and yet it all feels pretty meaningless.

As I sit here, halfway through this glass of wine, I'm pondering what I've done in my life, and what I'm willing to do, as well. So this blog is mostly me thinking aloud, if you will, and some of you may already be clicking away, and that's fine.

Now I know that this isn't my regular saucy post, but it's still me regardless.

In five years, I would like to have a home, a new car and someone to share it with, if at all possible. I come home at night to my dog, and while I'm beyond happy to see him, he can only fill so much of the void I feel. I've thought about getting back on stage, getting back into the comedy world.. maybe even produce some mini-series.. heck, I even tried awhile back if any of you remember, but we couldn't get our cast and crew to really put forth an effort, so we had to nix the project. I was deeply upset by it, but not because it was a failed effort (although that was part of it) but also because I had entrusted these people with my creative "baby" so to speak and they put it on the sidelines as if it weren't important to them. And I'm no Tracy Ullman. I can't do an entire show by myself. I mean, I could obviously try, but it wouldn't be very interesting.

This is a recurring theme in my life and I wish I knew how to correct it. If you have any ideas, please feel free to message me and let me know.

But I find myself, all too many times, putting much more faith in people than they end up being worth. I'm not saying that to be rude; I'm saying it to be honest with you and myself. People constantly let me down and yet I constantly let them. Maybe there is a romantic inside me, thinking that someone out there will appreciate the love and dedication that goes into making something work (whether it be a mini-series, a love relationship, a work relationship, a friendship, etc)..

So is it silly to expect anything from another human being? Maybe. But when I embark on a new venture, everyone who is along for the ride gets super stoked, but they all fall along the wayside and move on rather quickly.

Nobody is as passionate about your passion as you are, and I understand that, whole-heartedly. But why the interest and then sudden disinterest? Upset because creating entertainment takes a lot of hard work and dedication? Taking all the fun out of the end product by seeing the inner workings of how it becomes something?

It just dawned on me in this blog how much the entertainment business is like a relationship. Everyone is constantly trying to be remembered. To be the last thought in your mind before you go to bed at night. I'm starting to think it's the one thing that unites every human being on this planet.

Nobody wants to be forgotten. And if you have no one there to say "How could I ever forget you?" then there is a void in your existence.

I have no one like that. I feel that void in my life. I want to know someone will love me, regardless of my many quirks and kinks.

So, will I be forgotten? Will you be forgotten? Does it hurt your heart to think about it? If it does, then pour yourself a glass of red wine and have a toast with me. I wont forget you, friend.

What Is Love?

2012-05-02T22:27:00.001-04:00

Ok, so I put that title because I love Night at the Roxbury, but seriously!?!

Guys, pay attention. Girls, tell me if I'm right..

We're brought up with fairy tales of the down-n-out girl who is swept away by Prince Charming... sure sometimes they have to kiss a few frogs in the process, but she ends up "happily ever after"..

Can it actually happen? Can a woman find a man these days who really and truly completes her?

We don't want to feel like we've settled.. that feeling sucks. We need to be wowwed. We need to be woo'd.
Believe it or not, some of us actually still believe in true love and fairy tales and happily ever after.

At this point in the blog, someone (a scrooge) is rolling their eyes and telling me to get real, grow up, etc.

No. I will not. I want a love story. I want an amazing adventure that I can pass to generations after me. One that is worthy of a movie or a fairy tale book. Some people think this is unrealistic. Why? Because we work and have jobs? Because that's not "how it works"..?

Well if someone wants me, they have to enter my fairy tale, romanticized world and be a Prince Charming.

"Nice tits" doesn't get you there. Sure, it's nice to know someone likes your body, but that's the most superficial thing you could come up with...

Guys, if you like a girl--tell her something you like about her that other people think is unusual.

Guys tell me all the time that they think it's awesome that I'm a nerdy gamer girl, but there is way more to me than just that. I also love the cello, a good story, sword fights in movies, animals, rain and how I look when it's just me sitting around the house in my sweats.

There are a million things you can say to a woman to make her go "aww" and blush. Try telling her the truth. When you see her, do you get butterflies? Tell her. Be romantic. We don't care about "how hard" we make you if we don't know your name.. again, nice to hear we're attractive enough to turn you on, but that's nothing special on your end.

Show us that you're paying attention. Work for it. If you want us, don't be too shy or too forward. Do something memorable and romantic, so we can't forget you.

I'm honestly starting to think romance is dead. If we can't show people how we really feel, then why develop so many ways to communicate?

xoxo,
jess

The White Rabbit

2012-04-11T23:50:00.004-04:00

Sooooo... I'm sure you've all seen and/or read Alice in Wonderland.

But have you ever stopped to think what could've been the driving force behind the story? Well, here is a glance at what it could've been.

Fair warning: THIS STORY is NOT for the faint of heart. If you think you can handle it, click the book cover below.

Wanna Be a Loser With Me? :D Yay!

2012-03-19T03:38:00.002-04:00

So, here are my favorite things.. I use GetGlue.. and I check in a few times a week... so check it out, see what we jive on! :D

Justice for Trayvon Martin

2012-03-17T02:14:00.001-04:00

So as you guys know, I like to keep you up to date with the things that get under my skin. Here is another one.

Trayvon Martin was a seventeen year old boy. He went with his father to visit someone and went to 7-11 to buy skittles and iced tea. When he didn't return, his father got worried and called around. Finally, he called the police and had to identify his son's corpse through graphic pictures.

What happened, you ask?

Well, 28 year old George Zimmerman gunned him down. Zimmerman was acting as a "neighborhood watch captain" and had apparently spotted the young boy returning home and phoned it into police that Trayvon looked "real suspicious"...

This is one of the sweetest looking teenagers I know of.. he doesn't strike me as being a person to raise suspicion.

The police dispatcher told Zimmerman that a police unit was on its' way and not to pursue Trayvon. Yet he blatantly disregarded the dispatcher, following Trayvon and ultimately murdering him in cold blood.

Witnesses who heard the incident happening state that they heard the boy screaming for help. The sound of his cries for help were followed by a gun shot, and then silence.

When police arrived at the scene, Trayvon was lying face-down in the grass with a fatal gunshot wound to the chest. Zimmerman was standing, with blood on his face and grass stains on his clothes.

Even though Trayvon was buried on 03 March 2012, Zimmerman has yet to be charged with anything.

A lot of you know I used to be military police. There is an escalation of force. You DO NOT use a firearm as your first line of defense. Although Zimmerman and the Sanford, FL police department don't seem to care about that... Zimmerman actually said it was in SELF DEFENSE.

I call the bullshit flag on this one. How can it be self defense, when you're the one in pursuit?

The Florida police department claims that their investigation is color blind, but I think something is wrong with this picture. If it had been the other way around, you bet your ass Trayvon would be locked up right this very second. Zimmerman has a history of violence; he assaulted a police officer back in 2005 and was arrested for it, yet the police department says he has a clean record.

In addition to the Sanford police department letting the murderer walk away, the officer in charge of the crime scene is in charge of another controversial case. In 2010, one of their lieutenant's sons was filmed beating a black homeless man. The police didn't arrest the boy, when the crime was reported.. but after the tape was released on the local news, they arrested him.

So this goes to show you the power of media and the power of people banning together for justice.

This video is from a Virginia Beach comic, who goes by the name of Felonious Munk. He was the one who made this known to me, and now I am sharing it with you.

I hope you'll join us and help find justice for a child that is now gone.. just because of one man's actions that have been kept private by the Sanford police department.

407-688-5070 - Sanford Police Department

Demand justice, demand answers.

You can also hear the 911 call here -

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/03/16/trayvon-martin-911-audio-_n_1354909.html

Breaking the LOL, Breaking the LOL!

2012-03-10T17:16:00.000-05:00

If you know where that title reference is from, you're one step ahead of the nerd curve!

I haven't blogged in a really long time... I know, you were going through withdraws! So what are we going to cover today?

I was thinking some funny YouTube videos, a couple amazing stories on a new thing called Wattpad, and then we'll wrap it up with a serious note--Kony 2012.

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YouTube or Not to Youtube, That IS the Question.

So I have to admit.. I've been a fan of this broad for awhile now, but never have I actually went as far as to blog about her.. Some of you may know her as Jenna Marbles!

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"Do not tempt me Madeline, for you know not what I am." - Hotel Transylvania, Chelsea Quinn Yarbro

That is one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite books of all time! I frakkin' LOVE to read. With that being said, let me introduce you to Wattpad.

Wattpad is to writers, what YouTube is to amateur filmmakers.

Myself and my cousin, Kristin actually have stories there.. and I have to admit, if I wasn't writing them, I'd be a reader, no doubt.

Anyway, so here are some of my favorite stories on Wattpad right now, and I strongly encourage you to check them out, maybe even start one of your own if you get the inkling!

First off, is Life Lines. I'm on book two now, book one was phenomenal.

Life lines is a coming of age tale, except there is something incredibly different. People are born with tattoos, denoting what will happen in their life, who they will marry, etc... BUT, when you hit puberty there is a small chance you might become "Elite".. these people go through some changes, get violently ill and their tattoos change. The story follows Natalie Abernathy and her friends, family, enemies.. and honestly, with every chapter update I go directly to the site and read. THAT'S how good it is.

So here's the link to book one and book two of Life Lines by SCCourtney.

Part One: Elite http://www.wattpad.com/2704246-life-lines-elite-part-one-life-lines/intro

Part Two: Assarion http://www.wattpad.com/3372355-life-lines-assarion-part-two-description/intro

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Also, if you're a sap like me.. you'll love this one. It's by AubreyEatsHearts, and boy does she ever...
The story is called Late Summer Rain. I can't tell you anything more, just read.

http://www.wattpad.com/1220540-late-summer-rain-red-hot-babe/intro#

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And lastly, The White Rabbit - if you love fairy tales, murder, mystery, suspense, thriller and having your perception on a classic tale flipped until you can't even imagine the original story being anything but what your new perception sees it as.. well this story is perfect for you. It's done by LullabyOfBlueHearts (myself and my cousin, Kristin.

http://www.wattpad.com/3655007-the-white-rabbit-prologue/intro

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KONY 2012

If you don't know what this is about, please please please watch this video. You need to know what's happening, and we need to come together as one.

Life Worth the Pain

2011-12-03T18:33:00.001-05:00

I blog because I have nobody here who cares enough to listen. Than became even more evident today.

Right now I am broken-hearted beyond belief. I don't know where to start, so I don't know if this will make any sense..

Today I rode to the store with my mother to get stuff for the auction. I have felt terrible all day, and the news of things today online has overwhelmed me and made me feel helpless. No matter what I seem to do, it isn't enough. In my personal life, my love life and professional/activism life. That's how I was feeling today. Should have seen it coming.

She picked me up and we were going to stop to get food on the way back from the store because I hadn't eaten since yesterday and have no means to do so unless she helps me, because I just started a new job and don't get paid for two more weeks.

On the way there, we get caught in what this town thinks is a 'parade'.. and I tell my mother, "A parade requires pageantry. Ten trucks with kids sitting on hay bales throwing candy at people isn't a parade, it's a nuisance." and so it started. She starts eating away at everything I say, telling me I'm being an asshole, essentially..

Anyway, we're in the car and we pass this ugly kid in the parking lot and I say, "God he's ugly, who let THEM breed?" So she starts in on her "You're so negative." spiel and I say to her "I'm not being negative, I'm just being honest."

So then in the store she continues to tell me I'm being negative.. until I break off and find some vegetarian frozen dinners (Amy's.. they're the best!) and then back in the car I was trying to joke with her.. but she doesn't get me at all. It's not like she would anyway, she barely knows me at all.

------------------------------------------------------------
When I was born, she was only sixteen years old.. and she decided she was going to run away. There are two stories I've been told regarding this. The one from my grandfather goes like this:
"You were about 3 months old and she wanted to run off with her friends so she cut the screen window open and left you there in the bed."

The one I got from her when I was about 16 goes something like this:
"I wanted to leave and go to Missouri with my friends and I wanted to take you with me, but daddy (my grandfather, that raised me) wouldn't let me so I had to leave without you."
-------------------------------------------------------------

I'm not stupid. Anyone who knows anything about people is that they exaggerate. There are three sides to every story.. his, hers and the truth. So in my opinion, I see it playing out something like this.. based on what I've known from either side. She wanted to run away with her friends to Missouri.. my grandfather wouldn't let her go and probably reminded her of her new baby that she doesn't know anything about.. she probably threw a fit and ran to her room (she WAS 16) and then she probably decided she still wanted to go, but decided to leave me with them since she didn't know how to raise a child. I was raised by my grandparents, and essentially adopted by them. My mother was vaguely involved in my life, but I called her Pam and never lived with her until my grandmother died when I was 16. Even then, she sent me to live with an aunt and uncle after just months of being there with her, because she couldn't handle having me there.

But this raises some questions for me, since I am the child that was left behind..

-Mother, if it was bad enough to make you run away, what made you think it'd be okay to leave me?
-Mother, I know you didn't know you were pregnant until late in your pregnancy with me, but did you not bond with me at all while pregnant? Can you just leave your child with no regrets? No second thoughts?
-Mother, did you ever think about what my life would be like if you left me? Or was it a dumb teenage mistake that you made?
-Mother, do you ever regret not knowing me?

---

So anyway, we're in the car and I try to make a joke..

"Hmm let's try to be negative.. oh.. that guy is fat," I say. Her face is stone cold. So I try to explain to her, "..you take it all personally, but it has nothing to do with you. Its not you that I'm talking about."

So then she attacks my intelligence. "You're just stupid.. you say everyone in West Virginia is so ignorant because they don't think like you, talk like you and they're not worried about the same things you are.. and that's just dumb."

So a few more petty passes at each other later, I mention that my new work place is great, and the people there get me.. they think the same way I do.. and she goes, "Well I hope to god I never meet them, then."

I feel like someone just punched me in the soul. With a knife..

I blink a couple times and say, "So you're saying you wish you never met me?"

And she scoffs at me and goes, "..little too late for that, isn't it.."

And the knife twists. I don't know what else to do.

"Just drop me off then before you go to the auction." I say.

"Fine, if that's what you want to do." she replies.

"You said it, I didn't." I finish with...

So then if that all isn't bad enough, we get caught behind this stupid "parade" again. So I'm sitting in the car with a lump in my throat, holding back my tears and she's getting phone calls, and talking to people like none of what just happened affected her at all.

I'm sitting there in silence, feeling like a cancer again. And she confirmed it by saying what she did, and my heart was breaking. I just stared out the window, trying not to cry.. thinking about all the times she's 'forgotten' me somewhere, 'forgot' to call.. and it's building.. hurting more and more. And she acts like it doesn't bother her a bit. And my mind is racing, thinking things like:

"Am I THAT bad to be around..."
"At least my papou (grandfather) loves me."
"Why am I constantly surrounded by people who don't appreciate me?"
"Maybe she hates me.."
"She's never considered me hers.. I was the mistake she wished she could erase."

So I'm thinking these things and can barely breath because if I breath too much, I'll burst into tears.. And I couldnt handle it.. I cant cry in front of her and let her know she hurt me. She already knew she hurt me when she said what she did. Why let her know how much...

So then she goes through the drive-thru for my brother (the felon who is out on two bonds right now for theft.. stealing from my mother, nonetheless) .. and gets him food, and she'd already gotten him cigarettes.. and I'm still sitting there in silence. My mind starts reeling again.

"What do I have to do to be loved like that?"
"Maybe I should be a felon like my brother and let the system win."
"Maybe I should settle for a life of mediocrity, and just let the world pass me by."
"Frak that."
"Maybe I'm not the problem here. I know I'm a good person."
"Maybe the problem is that I've got too much to say."
"Does my family hate me? If so why?"
"Maybe I should just move away and start anew, away from all this."
"Shit, how am I going to get to work while my car is down."

I couldn't stop my mind from going everywhere but I knew I could hold my tears back.
I started practicing breathing, calmed myself down enough to get a few words out. I knew it was the only thing I could say without crying.. business/professional me took over for emotional me..

"How am I going to get to work while the cars down? Are you still taking me, or do I need to find someone else?"

She had her face all scrunched up in a 'fuck you, see, you need me' face.. and she says, "I'll still take you," maintaining her angry face...

At this point I still want to cry, but relieved I won't have to find another way to work. I kinda wish I could disintegrate.

We finally near my street and she calls my brother and tells him to come out and get his food and cigarettes. He does.. then we drive the rest of the way down the street and I've already gotten everything gathered together to make a beeline out of the car.

She pulls up and stops in the road for me to get out and says, "Your food (frozen dinner things) is in the back."

I just wanna get away from the car so I can burst into an emotional fountain..

"I don't want them anymore." I say in a sigh. It was a lie. I'm starving.. even while I write this.

"Oh well, they'll be in the trash then." she says back to me.

And it just comes out of me, "Kinda just like me then." and I shut the car door.

As soon as I got behind my front door I started crying like a banshee. I got to my room and my dog was flipping out at me crying.. he kept trying to lick my face and get me to stop. And I told him everything. Then I was sitting on the storage ottoman chest thing at the end of my bed and realized my dog is my only outlet.. except for my blog.

Nobody here cares what I have to say, how I feel.. it's all a joke to them. So if you read this all, thank you for listening. Sorry for unloading, but I needed to..

The world is falling apart all around me. My government is declaring war on its citizens, my mother doesn't want to know me.. and I have nobody here, except a tiny dog.

I just wish someone could have as much love for me as I have for that little dog. Then maybe things wouldn't be such a wreck.

xoxo

Art :)

2011-12-03T02:58:00.001-05:00

Here are some of my favorite sketches this week :)

and lastly :)

Occupy Wallstreet & Illegal Actions

2011-11-16T00:06:00.006-05:00

Allow Occupy Wallstreet Protesters to retain their Constitutional Right: Peaceful Assembly for Redress of Grievances.

November 15, 2011

In the cover of night, NYPD raided the Occupy Wallstreet movement located in Zuccotti Park, NYC on an order from Mayor Bloomberg. The media was not allowed near Zuccotti Park and so everything that was covered by mainstream media came later in the morning. (The main news source has come from social media and live broadcasts from the protesters themselves, the longest of which was ran by @TheOther99 on UStream, running 19 hours)

These peaceful occupiers have been there a number of months now (because our voice hasn't even been acknowledged, let alone heard) and had tents set up to protect them from the harsh environment. They also had a tent set up for a make-shift kitchen and they had their own sanitation crew doing regular sweeps of the park to ensure health and wellness of those protesting and the surrounding neighborhood.

Hundreds of police officers in riot gear surrounded the protesters and took the park by storm. There were several reports of police brutality from this instance that have gone ignored. Once the occupiers were mostly gone, the sanitation trucks came in and everything in the park was tossed in carelessly with no regard to ownership and hauled away.

Some protesters even had their pets with them and were not allowed to get their pets from inside of Zuccotti Park. Among other things, one of the things destroyed during this incident happened to be, what the protesters have come to know as, "The People's Library".. which contained over 5,000 books. It was like the most terrifying scene from a Ray Bradbury novel.

A few hours later, the occupiers banned together and went to Foley Square for a General Assembly, which was coordinated through the use of social media sites like Twitter, Facebook, Livestream and UStream. There were still a number of people who were barricaded in at Broadway and Pine. One young man went on camera, testifying to being struck with a police baton and witnessed police hitting women in their gut, dragging them away by their hands and/or feet.

Later that morning, at Foley Square, while being recorded a police officer pushed a man with his baton who was not advancing, resisting or anything of the sort. When he asked the female police officer beside that officer if she was a police officer and if he could report a police brutality crime, she wouldn't even acknowledge his presence.

The occupiers from this movement were treated worse than animals in the last 24 hours. They have been stripped of all their possessions that might give them some relief from the elements, stripped of their reading material and forcibly and illegally removed from Zuccotti Park, or what has recently been dubbed "Liberty Plaza"

If this all wasn't bad enough, Mayor Bloomberg is using the majority of his police force to, for lack of a better term, "babysit" our people who have been allowed back into the park after a long and grueling day in Court.

The court today heard the case and favored on the side of the occupiers. In NYC, though, they have 45 minutes to make an appeal. The Bloomberg administration did just that, and a second ruling came down stating the protesters could again use Zuccotti Park as their movement's home, but they were denied the use of shelter, sleeping bags and the like.. they are not even allowed to lay down or sleep.. but once they leave, they cannot come back in.

The government is using sleep deprivation to stop a protest. This is illegal and inhumane. Human rights are being violated.

Not to mention the "park rules" that have been set in place by a cooperation of the Bloomberg administration and the privatized company who owns Zuccotti Park were no even set in place until eight (8) days after the Occupy Wallstreet movement began. They illegally raided this park on the grounds of the protesters breaking these rules. It is illegal to enforce a law retroactively. These laws are known as Ex Posto Facto, and they are strictly forbidden by the US Constitution.

But now that they NYPD have gotten the protesters out of the park (apparently by any means necessary, shame on them..) NYPD can now enforce the "park rules" that have been set forth. But there are hundreds of people who are sitting jail cells, who have been illegally imprisoned on American soil, because the US Government will not uphold the Constitution, the foundation of this country.

The police have become paramilitary in their mindset. I should know, I was military police in the US Navy for four years and I've worked directly with NYPD in the past during Fleet Week 2003. What the police and the rest of the country don't realize though, is that we are all part of the lower 99%. Even the military income is so low that they qualify for welfare, food stamps and other government aid.

After hundreds of arrests, police brutality and unlawful orders, we MUST tell Mayor Bloomberg that this is WRONG and WE THE PEOPLE will not let this slide.

If this is ignored, our America has died. We must stop the government from ignoring us. WE THE PEOPLE. It's time to put our foot down. Stand up and fight for your country and the rights and freedoms it was based on!

We have the right to freedom of assembly. We have the right to freedom of speech and freedom of the press.

The sad thing is, all of those things were taken from American citizens last night on American soil. What are we going to do about it? This is the beginning of a new America in a sense, because we're going back to our core values for the first time in a long time. The people who are occupying Wallstreet right now can't be bought. That's TRUE American.

Sign this petition if you would like your voice to be heard, and please share it with anyone you know.

http://www.change.org/petitions/mayor-nyc-allow-occupy-wallstreet-protesters-to-retain-their-constitutional-right

Immigration & USA PATRIOT Act

2011-11-14T06:24:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I haven't posted a blog in quite some time, but I try not to say things without thinking them through first, so you'll have to excuse my absence.

I've been on Change.org all night looking at petitions. I came across a petition (which I will link at the bottom of this entry) that really got me thinking. Most of the people I am unfortunately surrounded by are what you and I would consider "white racist bigots" and so I constantly hear racial slurs and things like "...(this race) should go back to their country.." or "...all the (race) are taking our jobs."

Now I am sure you have heard every argument in the book on this topic. But like I said, this particular story really got me thinking.

I've always been a person who tries to see everyone equally. I believe we need to break down all these "borders" we put up between people with differences, whether it be age, religion, sex, orientation, color or creed. We have enough limitations as it is, why put up more?

Anyway, there is a man.. Arnold Giammarco, who is facing deportation on the 22nd of November, 2011. The man is over 50 years old and he has been here since the age of 4. He has served in the US Army, has a wife and a three year old daughter. There were some issues going on in his life when he was younger (he fell into substance abuse and was actually homeless for a stretch.. performing illegal acts so he could survive) and he lost his green card because of it all. But he got it back. Keep in mind, he's been here since he was 4 years old. But an old charge has been brought up from five years ago and now he's facing deportation.

I signed the petition after reading his story on his site and I encourage you to read it too. (I'll link at the end.)

But it got me a little wound up, and this is why.

Yes, this man has made some bad decisions. Who hasn't? This man has served his country, which is more than I can say for 90% of the people who fell out of a vagina IN this country. This man is more of an American than most.

He isn't even an illegal immigrant. He is here legally. But that's not what has been firing the synapses in my brain..

I wanna put this out there.. who cares?

Most of the people born in this country have no drive, no ambition. They are happy with the mundane and mediocre. They were brought up with things like media, free speech, clean homes, educational opportunities.. things that they take for granted on a daily basis. They don't understand that those things would be considered luxuries in 70% of the world.

So here they are, sitting on the sofa, eating their fast food, watching Netflix on their Xbox.. meanwhile there are thousands of immigrants (legal and otherwise) working two and three jobs trying to excel, so they can make their quality of life worth living. So their family too, can one day sit back on a sofa, eat fast food and watch Netflix on an Xbox.

See what I'm getting at here? Who cares about immigration? All of our families were immigrants at one point or another.. unless your Native American or African American.. and in those cases your ancestors were taken advantage of by the 'American' people because why.. because they were greedy and wanted everything for themselves. They wanted to make you work for them, so they could sit back on their porch swing and drink lemonade... or so they could manipulate you into giving up what was rightfully yours, so they could 'escape religious persecution' and do what they wanted...

But then in my mind, I think - "What kind of religion is worth stealing, killing and manipulating an entire race of people for?" My answer.. nothing is worth that price, especially something that is strictly personal--like religion.

So, I know I side-stepped a bit there.. but back to what I'm getting at.. Why does it matter? If there are people in the world who want to come to this country and earn an honest living, why not?

The Declaration of Independence doesn't say "all citizens are created equal" does it? No, it says "all men are created equal".. every human being on the face of the planet should have the same rights and opportunities as the next. That was what Thomas Jefferson was saying. So why is the US being so exclusive with human rights now?

The same reason they're infringing upon everyone's rights in this country. The "terrorist" attacks on 9/11 gave them an excuse to do whatever they wanted. Don't think it's the truth? How about The Patriot Act?

----------from wikipedia-----------
USA PATRIOT Act which is an acronym for "Uniting (and) Strengthening America (by) Providing Appropriate Tools Required (to) Intercept (and) Obstruct Terrorism Act of 2001." has allowed the US government to dramatically reduce restrictions on law enforcement agencies' ability to search telephone, e-mail communications, medical, financial, and other records; eased restrictions on foreign intelligence gathering within the United States; expanded the Secretary of the Treasury’s authority to regulate financial transactions, particularly those involving foreign individuals and entities; and broadened the discretion of law enforcement and immigration authorities in detaining and deporting immigrants suspected of terrorism-related acts. The act also expanded the definition of terrorism to include domestic terrorism, thus enlarging the number of activities to which the USA PATRIOT Act’s expanded law enforcement powers can be applied.

On May 26, 2011, President Barack Obama signed a four-year extension of three key provisions in the USA PATRIOT Act: ^[2] roving wiretaps, searches of business records (the "library records provision"), and conducting surveillance of "lone wolves" — individuals suspected of terrorist-related activities not linked to terrorist groups.^[3]
------------------------------------------

So where does it stop? Our fourth amendment rights protect us against unreasonable search and seizure, (which by the way means they need a warrant for anything you would have a reasonable expectation of privacy with, such as phone calls, internet instances, homes, etc.. ) yet the USA PATRIOT Act of 2001 makes it okay for them to access those things freely, at their leisure.

So as you can see the government has bigger fish to fry.. so why aren't they? Did you know when the USA PATRIOT Act was sent through Congress, most didn't even bother reading it? (Which by the way, you can witness in that Fahrenheit 9/11 movie.. )

Makes you wonder what else they don't care enough to bother with, doesn't it?

So there are a ton of problems here in this country. If someone wants to be here, let them. Who knows, maybe they will be the person to help fix it.. Why do we have borders anyway? So we can define who we are? If we need labels to define who we are, we'll never truly understand who we are. We are humanity. We're all stuck on the same big rock, floating around a gaseous body in space. And unless you own a spaceship that I dont know about, none of us are getting off this rock anytime soon.

So what's the moral of the story? Even though we're greedy and paranoid to a fault, we need to stop being 'Americans' and just be humans. Too many imaginary lines as is. America has a chance to save face and show a little compassion. I hope they 'man up' and give this US Veteran a chance. Will they? Who knows. But whatever the outcome of this case, it will show you if the US is ready for the next step in global thinking or not.

I am so tired of all the hate and discrimination. I'm so tired of giving up my freedoms just because my government doesn't do their job (literally).. and when they actually DO their job, they don't do it with humanity and equality in mind.

So now that my rant is over, here is the link to the petition. And let me know what you think.. I know it's a bit of a rant and it jumps around, but my intention isn't a grade.. my intention is to talk with you, as a fellow human being and get to the core of the matter.

Petition - http://www.change.org/petitions/stop-the-deportation-of-us-veteran-arnold-giammarco

Arnold Giammarco's Story - http://www.freearnold.com

Important Update on Zeitgeist's Occupy Wallstreet Movement

2011-10-20T22:30:00.000-04:00

Friends,

On Oct 22nd 2011 at 3pm EDT Peter Joseph will host a New York City TownHall Event from Occupy Wall Street, NYC.

Peter will present a lecture called:

“Understanding Root Causes: Following the Train of Thought to a new Social System"

After will be an audience Q&A

This free event is very limited in seating and entry is on a first come, first serve basis.

However, it will be streamed live for the global audience:

Live Stream
zeitgeist-ny.com/blog/2011/10/20/zeitgeist-nyc-town-hall-hosted-by-peter-joseph-10-22-2011/

Time: 3-5pm
Saturday October, 22 2011

Location:
Epifaneo
56 Walker Street
NY, NY 10013

Directions:
Between Bway & Church St. l Trains – N, Q, J, Z, 4, 6, R, A, C, E

In Solidarity,
TZM

What is your Cusp or Week called?

2011-10-04T06:39:00.002-04:00

Pisces-Aries; March 19-24 (Cusp of Rebirth)
Aries 1; March 25-April 2 (Week of the Child)
Aries 2; April 3-10 (Week of the Star)
Aries 3; April 11-18 (Week of the Pioneer)

Aries-Taurus; April 19-24 (Cusp of Power)
Taurus 1; April 25-May 2 (Week of Manifestation)
Taurus 2; May 3-10 (Week of the Teacher)
Taurus 3; May 11-18 (Week of the Natural)

Taurus-Gemini; May 19-24 (Cusp of Energy)
Gemini 1; May 25-June 2 (Week of Freedom)
Gemini 2; June 3-10 (Week of the New Language)
Gemini 3; June 11-18 (The Week of the Seeker)

Gemini-Cancer; June 19-24 (Cusp of magic)
Cancer 1; June 25-July 2 (Week of the Empath)
Cancer 2; July 3-10 (Week of the Unconventional)
Cancer 3; July 11-18 (Week of the Persuader)

Cancer-Leo; July 19-25 (Cusp of Oscillation)
Leo 1; July 26-August 2 (Week of Authority)
Leo 2; August 3-10 (Week of the Balanced Strength)
Leo 3; August 11-18 (Week of leadership)

Leo-Virgo; August 19-25 (Cusp of Exposure)
Virgo 1; August 26-September 2 (Week of System Builders)
Virgo 2; September 3-10 (Week of the Enigma)
Virgo 3; September 11-18 (Week of the Literalist)

Virgo-Libra; September 19-24 (Cusp of Beauty)
Libra 1; September 25-October 2 (The Perfectionist Week)
Libra 2; October 3-10 (Week of Society)
Libra 3; October 11-18 (Week of the Theater)

Libra-Scorpio; October 19-24 (Cusp of Criticism)
Scorpio 1; October 26-November 2 (Week of Intensity)
Scorpio 2; November 3-10 (Week of Depth)
Scorpio 3; November 11-18 (Week of Charm)

Scorpio-Sagittarius; November 19-24 (Cusp of Revolution)
Sagittarius 1; November 25-December 2 (Week of Independence)
Sagittarius 2; December 3-10 (Week of the Originator)
Sagittarius 3; December 11-18 (Week of the Titan)

Sagittarius-Capricorn; December 19-24 (Cusp of Prophecy)
Capricorn 1; December 25-January 2 (Week of the Ruler)
Capricorn 2; January 3-10 (Week of Determination)
Capricorn 3; January 11-18 (Week of Dominance)

Capricorn-Aquarius; January 17-22 (Cusp of Imagination)
Aquarius 1; January 23-30 (Week of the Genius)
Aquarius 2; January 31-Febuary 7 (Week of Youth & Ease)
Aquarius 3; Febuary 8-15 (Week of Acceptance)

Aquarius-Pisces; Febuary 16-22 (Cusp of Sensitivity)
Pisces 1; Febuary 23-March 2 (Week of Spirit)
Pisces 2; March 3-10 (Week of the Loner)
Pisces 3; March 11-18 (Week of Dancers & Dreamers)

The More You Know

2011-09-24T14:19:00.000-04:00

Wanted to know more about me, according to emails I received, so here goes nothing :)

------

I started my life in Kanawha City, West Virginia. I went to school, and wanted to be an astronaut. I lived with my grandparents and abusive uncle because my mother had me at a young age and wasn't ready to take care of me.

I was a cheerleader, because it made me happy. I was able to escape from my everyday world and put a smile on my face a few hours a week.

I began taking creative writing & speech/debate classes at Hayes Junior High (now Hayes Middle School) with Mrs. Day and Mr. Hays. I joined the Young Republicans Club. I began taking Advanced Placement English and Astronomy courses while I was enrolled at Hurricane High School.

I later moved to Wilmington, North Carolina to finish my high school education. There I studied Theology & Bible Studies through an elective program ran by the school. I was also in E.A. Laney High School's ROTC program.

After graduating, I joined the U.S. Navy to become a Master-at-Arms (MA) also known as military police. After four years, I finally received my discharge. While in the military, I studied Philosophy & Fine Arts at Saint Leo University.

While still enlisted, I began doing comic strips for my fellow shipmates, and branched off to doing stand-up comedy at the Funnybone in Virginia Beach. Afterwards, I started doing sketch comedy with a group of friends. As we all began scattering across the nation, we ceased doing our skits, but kept in touch.

I also began my professional photography around that same time and received the Editor's Choice Award from the International Library of Photography as well as a publication.

I've lived all around the United States.. from Southern California to Virginia Beach. While living in Southern California, I legally changed my political affiliation to Libertarian, after seeing how the standards of the original Republican party had fallen to pieces.

Now in my free time, I write for Yahoo! CN, blog, tweet, and try to find ways to change the world.

:)

PS. Since Astronaut isn't a viable option any longer, I'm moved on.. now I want to be an Astrophysicist.