Jokers Joke

Stephen Colbert's Grammy Awards Opening Speech

Mon, 1 Feb 2010 21:00:00 EST

Here is Stephen Colbert's opening speech at the 2010 Grammy awards. He was pretty good despite the tough crowd. Take a look:

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College Humor Explains Why iPad is Comedy Gold

Mon, 1 Feb 2010 18:00:00 EST

College Humor thinks the iPad is pure comedy gold. Some of the many iPad jokes have included the iPad Nano, Hitler rants and, of course, comparison to feminine hygiene products.

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Hitler Learns About the iPad

Fri, 29 Jan 2010 15:00:00 EST

Hitler learns that the iPad device he was so excited does not have Flash, can't multitask, doesn't have a camera and fails on several other levels. Take a look:

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Ricky Gervais Hosts Golden Globes

Mon, 18 Jan 2010 15:00:00 EST

Comedian Ricky Gervais hosted the Golden Globes last night. A-list stars could not escape his jokes. In one joke he mocked Angelina Jolie. Gervais said, "Actors aren't just loved here in Hollywood, they're loved the world over because they're recognizable. You can be a little child, a little Asian child, with no possessions, no money - but you see a picture of Angelina Jolie and you think, 'Mummy!'"

Here are a couple highlight clips.

You can see more Golden Globes highlights here.

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Song: My Mom's On Facebook

Sat, 12 Dec 2009 16:22:00 EST

Parents joining Facebook has sent teens flocking to other social networks. The Outside Joke points out some of the problems with mothers joining Facebook in this song, "My Mom's On Facebook." Take a look:

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SNL Skit: Bunny Business: The Soundtrack

Sat, 14 Nov 2009 18:00:00 EST

The subject wasn't that funny but thankfully the artist impresonations were. Kristen Wiig does a hilarious Natalie Merchant. Taylor Swift also does a great Shakira. Take a look:

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Halloween Prank: Fake Trick or Treater

Mon, 2 Nov 2009 15:00:00 EST

Here is a very tricky prank: the fake trick or treater. Take a look:

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Jetsons Theme Song Extended

Sun, 25 Oct 2009 21:00:00 EST

The Jetsons Theme Song gets extended in this version from College Humor. You can also the watch video here on YouTube.

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Tracy Morgan Starts Tweeting

Sat, 10 Oct 2009 14:00:00 EST

Tracy Morgan has joined Twitter after being encourage to do so by a website called Twacy.org. You can follow Tracy on Twitter at @RealTracyMorgan.

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Twitter Killer: Duck-Clown-Fern

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 18:00:00 EST

An animated Ashton Kutcher shares a new "Twitter killer" social network in this video from Popzilla. It's a new social network called Duck-Clown-Fern where you are only allowed to share images of a duck, a clown or a fern to explain how you are doing. If only social networks could be so simple.

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Fox Anchor Tells Weatherman to Keep Having Sex With a Chicken

Thu, 17 Sep 2009 18:00:00 EST

FOX5 WNYW anchor Ernie Anastos told the weatherman on to "keep f***ing that chicken" on the Sept. 16 2009 10 o'clock news program. Wonder what in the world he was actually trying to say?

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Boom Boom Pope

Mon, 31 Aug 2009 18:00:00 EST

National Lampoon spoofs the Black Eyed Peas hit "Boom Boom Pow" with this song called "Boom Boom Pope."

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Dane Cook Jokes About Vanessa Hudgens Nude Photos

Mon, 10 Aug 2009 21:00:00 EST

MTV reports that comedian Dane Cook went there at the Teen Choice Awards and talked about the nude photos of Vanessa Hudgens that recently appeared on the Internet. He told Vanessa that she needs to keep her clothes on and that "phones are for phone calls."

"Before I do the Choice Hotties, can I just say what everybody in the room is thinking but nobody has said?" he announced to the audience, before scanning it to find "Bandslam" star Vanessa Hudgens, who was one of the nominees for Choice Hottie. Hudgens then half-heartedly raised her hand, looking like she knew or was fearing what was going to happen next.

"Girl, you gots to keep your clothes on! Phones are for phone calls, girl," he told the "High School Musical" star, who didn't seem very amused, judging by her reaction to his joke.

Without addressing it further, Cook then went into his presenting duties. Hudgens lost out on being one of the choice hotties of the night to Megan Fox and Robert Pattinson. When both Pattinson and Fox won, they thanked their fans for the honor.

The joke received some boos from the crowd. Here is a short clip of Dane Cook's joke:

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William Shatner Reads Sarah Palin's Farewell Speech, Tweets as Poetry

Fri, 31 Jul 2009 21:00:00 EST

William Shatner read Sarah Palin's farewell speech as poetry on Conan earlier this week. William Shatner also returned to read Sarah Palin's tweets are poetry.

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James Franco's Rejected UCLA Commencement Speech

Wed, 8 Jul 2009 18:00:00 EST

Here is James Franco rejected 2009 UCLA graduation commencement speech from Funny or Die.

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Bing. The Better Way To Google

Sun, 28 Jun 2009 18:00:00 EST

Sadly for Microsoft this joke on Bing's behalf is pretty accurate. Microsoft's new search engine Bing has gotten good reviews but Google has such as a powerful brand.

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Sex with Ducks by Garfunkel and Oates

Tue, 9 Jun 2009 21:00:00 EST

Riki "Garfunkel" Lindhome and Kate "Oates" Micucci sing a song in response to a recent Pat Robertson quote that legalizing gay marriage could lead to legalizing sex with ducks.

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Nation's Girlfriends Offer Economic Solution

Fri, 5 Jun 2009 15:00:00 EST

The nation's girlfriends have unveiled a new economic plan called "Let's Move In Together." The nation's girlfriends say it could save the country billions of dollars.

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Katharine McPhee in Paparazzi Protection

Fri, 29 May 2009 18:00:00 EST

Katharine McPhee has found some protection from the paparazzi.

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The Slumdog Price is Right

Mon, 18 May 2009 22:00:00 EST

All games shows apparently need the Slumdog treatment. Here's The Slumdog Price is Right.

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Kristen Wiig Gets Most SNL Skits

Fri, 15 May 2009 21:00:00 EST

Kristen Wiig is the clear leader in the total number of sketches by cast member in the 34th season. This chart is from Vulture. They also show the most frequently impersonated celebrities, which was led by Obama. The number of guest appearances in skits was Tina Fey, followed by Justin Timberlake.

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Kristen Wiig Talks About People's Most Beautiful Issue

Mon, 4 May 2009 14:00:00 EST

Kristen Wiig talks about making People's Most Beautiful issue. She says if she wasn't a comedian she would own a candy store and be a detective at the same time.

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2009 Webby Award Nominees for Humor

Thu, 30 Apr 2009 15:00:00 EST

These sites were nominated for a Webby award in the humor category.

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Funny or Die Parodies NOM Video

Tue, 21 Apr 2009 18:00:00 EST

Funny or Die has pariodied the anti gay marriage video created by NOM, The National Organization for Marriage. Take a look:

A Gaythering Storm from Jane Lynch

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Jay Leno Inserts Himself Into Susan Boyle Audition Video

Sun, 19 Apr 2009 08:00:00 EST

Jay Leno pretends to be Susan Boyle. He and his team of tech wizards insert him into the popular Susan Boyle audition clip that garnered over 66 million views in just one week. Jay Leno wishes he could sing that well.

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Steven Wright Pushes Brittany Murphy on a Swing

Mon, 6 Apr 2009 18:00:00 EST

Brittany Murphy and Steven Wright created a surreal opening to Craig Ferguson's show. The show aired on April 2nd.

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Portia De Rossi Apologizes to Prop 8 Supporters

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 18:00:00 EST

Portia De Rossi appeared on Jimmy Kimmel Live last night and released this funny PSA she made about gay marriage. Porta De Rossi's PSA is a saracastic apology to all the Prop 8 supporters.

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Sesame Street Explains the Madoff Scandal

Sun, 15 Mar 2009 15:00:00 EST

Ernie and Cookie Monster help explain the Madoff Scandal in this skit from the Jimmy Kimmel show.

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President Bush Interviews Himself

Fri, 13 Mar 2009 17:00:00 EST

President Bush interviews himself. Each President Bush is portrayed by Will Ferrell. Will Ferrell stars in his first HBO special, a live, 90-minute performance of his limited-run Broadway show, You're Welcome America. A Final Night with George W Bush. Premieres Saturday March 14th at 9pm.

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Ricky Gervais Talks With Elmo

Wed, 11 Mar 2009 16:00:00 EST

Here's some outtakes from Ricky Gervais on the set of Sesame Street with Elmo. The Associated Press says the full episode airs this November when Seasame Street opens with its 40th anniversary.

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KFC's Colonel Responds to Mel Gibson's Colonel Skit

Tue, 3 Mar 2009 14:00:00 EST

The KFC's Colonel has responded to Mel Gibson's fake Colonel bio pic on Jimmy Kimmel. Here's the response as well as Mel Gibson's skit.

Mel Gibson's "The Colonel" skit on Jimmy Kimmel

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Christian Bale and Joaquin Phoenix Parody at IFC Spirit Awards

Sun, 22 Feb 2009 18:00:00 EST

Batman (played by Steve Coogan) and Joaquin Phoenix (played by Frank Coraci) present the award for "Best Documentary" at the Independent Spirit Awards. A list of Spirit Awards winners is available here.

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The Onion on Sony's Latest Gadget Release

Mon, 9 Feb 2009 18:00:00 EST

The Onion has the details on the Sony's new stupid piece of sh*t. Note: lots of swearing in this one.

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SNL Short: I'm On A Boat

Sun, 8 Feb 2009 18:00:00 EST

Andy Samberg, Akiva and T-Pain boast about being on a boat in this SNL short.

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Seth Meyers Talks Politics

Tue, 27 Jan 2009 18:00:00 EST

Seth Meyers talked to David Letterman about the state of political humor now that Sarah Palin is somewhat out of the picture. He says Rod Blagojevich showed up like a "white knight with a bad haircut." He also thinks Biden has a lot to offer.

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8 Years Of Bushisms

Thu, 8 Jan 2009 18:00:00 EST

The Associated Press celebrates eight years of Bushisms in the clip below beginning with the time George Bush talked about OBGYNs needing to be able to practice their love with women.

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Onion Writer Puts Unused Joke For Sale on eBay

Fri, 2 Jan 2009 21:00:00 EST

A staffer from The Onion named John Harris has put an unused joke up for auction on eBay. You can see the auction listing here. This is what the listing for the auction says.

Hello,

My name is John Harris, and I am a staff writer at The Onion, America's Finest News Source. I am selling a joke that I can't find a contextual home for. To be fair, it's less of a joke and more of a dated, Capote-esque cocktail party bon mot, but decidedly more feeble. The best one can reasonably expect from this item is a self-satisfied chuckle, such as can be observed issuing from someone wearing a turtleneck while reading the Harper's Index. If that didn't make you barf, please continue reading.

The item in question will be clearly hand-printed on a 3x5 index card and mailed to the winning bidder upon receipt of payment. It has never been used, and the buyer assumes all responsibility for any consequences that might stem from sharing this joke, including the dissolution of friendships and romantic relationships due to loss of respect. The bidding will start at $0.57 so I can at least recoup the cost of the stamp and the eBay listing charge.

Please keep in mind that, due to the nature of this item as well that whole aphorism about accounting for taste, this is very much a caveat emptor-type transaction. In other words, no refunds.

Thanks and happy bidding,

John harris

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JibJab: 2008 Year In Review

Sun, 28 Dec 2008 18:00:00 EST

Jib Jab's 2008 Year in a Review looks back at what happened in 2008. An ugly looking New Year's baby covers some of the 2008 highlights included are the global meltdown, the election, Sarah Palin, Bill Gates leaving Microsoft, Illinois Governor Blagojevich and John Edwards' supposed love child.

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Jim Carrey Say Yes Top Ten

Fri, 19 Dec 2008 18:00:00 EST

Jim Carrey via satellite in a bath tub presented the Top Ten Things Jim Carrey Will Always Say Yes To for the David Letterman show. Carrey's been making the rounds to promote his Yes Man movie.

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Jim Carrey Says Yes to Everything Including Bungee Jumping

Wed, 10 Dec 2008 17:40:00 EST

Jim Carrey says yes to everything in his upcoming film, Yes Man. One of the things he says yes to in the film is bungee jumping. Carrey told MTV MTV that bungee jumping is the kind of thing you have to do if you want to keep up with Britney Spears.

"They were gonna do this on a green screen where I would hang on in front of the camera and they would bounce me up and down. And I said, 'I'm gonna be there, man!' " Carrey smiled. "This is what you've gotta do to compete with Britney Spears!"

Jim Carrey also talked to the AP in the video below about the bungee experience. Take a look:

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Jizz In My Pants

Sun, 7 Dec 2008 22:00:00 EST

SNL had a funny Andy Samberg short last night called Jizz in My Pants. The short included cameos from Molly Sims, Jamie-Lynn Sigler and Justin Timberlake. This apparently is the first single from The Lonely Island?s debut album "Incredibad." Lonely Island consists of Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer and Jorma Taccone. They have a YouTube channel here.

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Prop 8 the Musical

Wed, 3 Dec 2008 15:00:00 EST

Funny or Die does Prop 8 the musical with lots of guest stars including Margaret Cho, Andy Richter, Maya Rudolph and John C. Reilly. Jack Black plays Jesus.

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Alphacat and Lisa Nova as Obama and Palin

Sun, 23 Nov 2008 21:00:00 EST

Alphacat and Lisa Nova impersonated Barack Obama and Sarah Palin last night on YouTube Live. Alphacat does a pretty good Obama and sounds convincing as Sarah Palin (Lisa Nova) inquires as to why she isn't the one being picked for Secretary of State.

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Sproingo

Thu, 20 Nov 2008 18:00:00 EST

Here's another classic fake commercial from Saturday Night Live. It's for Sproingo, an erectile dysfunction drug that notifies you of an erection with a goofy sound effect. You'll hear when it's working...

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The Matrix Runs on Windows

Thu, 13 Nov 2008 18:00:00 EST

College Humor has a funny spoof of running on Microsoft Windows software. It's very funny but it's a bit harsh on poor Clippy though. :-)

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Top 10 Things Overheard During the Bush/Obama Meeting

Tue, 11 Nov 2008 15:00:00 EST

David Letterman stays on the current issues with this latest Top Ten List - The Top 10 Things Overheard During the Bush/Obama Meeting.

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Barack Obama's and John McCain's Alfred E. Smith Speeches

Sat, 18 Oct 2008 18:00:00 EST

Senator Barack Obama and Senator John McCain each gave humorous speeches at the Alfred E. Smith Memorial Foundation Dinner. It was a rare moment of levity in the middle of a serious campaign. The video clips are below. You can see a transcript of Barack Obama's speech here.

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SNL: VP Debate

Sun, 5 Oct 2008 21:00:00 EST

Once again Tiny Fey did a perfect Sarah Palin imitation as SNL spoofed the Vice Presidential debate between Joe Biden and Sarah Palin. Queen Latifah played PBS's Gwen Ifill. Here's the clip from SNL.

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John Hodgman in BBtv's SPAMasterpiece Theater

Thu, 2 Oct 2008 22:00:00 EST

John Hodgman performs some dramatic readings of spam.

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Tina Fey Plays Sarah Palin Again

Mon, 29 Sep 2008 21:00:00 EST

Tina Fey played GOP vp candidate Sarah Palin again last night on Saturday Night Live and once again she was perfect. The skit parodied a series of interviews with Sarah Palin by Katie Couric.

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SNL Digital Short: Space Olympics

Sat, 20 Sep 2008 21:00:00 EST

The year is 3022 and this galactic sporting event is having some financial issues. Another hilarious Andy Samberg song.

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Lisa Nova Mimics Sarah Palin

Mon, 15 Sep 2008 18:00:00 EST

It's tough to beat Tina Fey who both looked and sounded like Sarah Palin last night on SNL (see here). Lisa Nova does a pretty good Sarah Palin herself. In the video clip below she spoofs the Palin interview with Charlie Gibson. In the interview Sarah Palin did not know what the Bush Doctrine was.

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Tina Fey to Play Sarah Palin?

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 18:00:00 EST

The Huffington Post reports that SNL producer Lorne Michaels is talking to Tina Fey about her playing John McCain's running mate Sarah Palin. It sounds like a perfect role for Fey. All she needs are Sarah Palin's glasses and she will look just like her.

Saturday Night Live creator and executive producer Lorne Michaels said the show is talking with Tina Fey about playing Republican vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin at some point this season, possibly as soon as this Saturday's season premiere. Tina Fey

"There are discussions [with Tina]," Michaels said during a conference call with reporters. "They are ongoing."

Gina Gershon didn't do a bag job either for Funny or Die - see here. Comedian Sara Benincasa has also been doing a great Sarah Palin on YouTube.

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Russell Brand Ignites Controversy at the VMAs

Mon, 8 Sep 2008 19:40:00 EST

British comedian Russell Brand's comedy routine at last night's MTV VMAs has been both applauded and criticized. You can see the video here. Brand seems to have a bit of Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean in him. His delivery is good and he has crazy hair. He didn't hold back at last night's VMAs and dove straight into the hot political issues. Brand asked Americans to please elect Barack Obama. Brand also joked about Levi Johnston - the father of Bristol Palin's baby - being forced to go to the Republican convention

BRAND: "Now, as a representative of the global community and a visitor from abroad, I don't want to come across a little bit biased, but could I please ask of you people of America, to PLEASE ELECT BARACK OBAMA. Please! On behalf of the world. (Camera pans to singers Chris Brown and Britney Spears applauding and cheering.) Some people, I think they're called racists, say that America is not ready for a black president. But I know America to be a forward-thinking country, right. Because, otherwise, you know, would you have let that retarded cowboy fellow be president for eight years?

We were very impressed. It was nice of you to let him have a go. Because in England, George Bush wouldn't be trusted with a pair of scissors.

I am obliged by broadcasting law to show some balance in this situation, which means, uh, the Republicans might be alright. Sarah Palin. She's a VILF! A vice president I'd like to...fumble, fondle, I dunno. I do feel a little bit sorry for her daughter, getting pregnant, poor kid. Is it a boy? Is it a girl? It?s a P.R. stunt. Come on. Be honest.

And I feel most sorry for that poor teenaged father. Boy. One minute, he's just a teenaged lad in Alaska having joyful, unprotected sex. And the next minute: Get to the Republican convention. I think that is the best safe sex message of all time. Use a condom or become Republican! ...That boy will spend the rest of his life masturbating while wearing a condom?

...New music, new president, and brand new America. And you people deserve it after eight years of Bush. I promise you, you deserve it...

Transcription hat tip goes to Michelle Malkin who hated Brand's routine. Malkin called last night's VMAs "the latest venue for vicious Palin family-bashing." Some other blogs discussing Brand's performance last night can be found here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here and here.

Russell Brand also joked about the Jonas Brothers being virgins and Paris Hilton later came to their defense. Paris said, "That's something cool for a kid to keep, so don't pick on them for that." Paris also said she is still is a fan of Brand.

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Sara Benincasa Does Sarah Palin

Tue, 2 Sep 2008 15:36:00 EST

A comedian named Sara Benincasa has been making some funny Sarah Palin YouTube entries. Below is the first entry in the series. You can see more of them here on Sara's YouTube channel. (via Wonkette)

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The Daily Show's Obama Bio

Fri, 29 Aug 2008 18:00:00 EST

Here's the Daily Show's take on Barack Obama's biography video.

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Obama-Biden Nicknames

Wed, 27 Aug 2008 18:00:00 EST

Here are some Barack Obama and Joe Biden ticket nicknames from the Late Show with David Letterman. Jidenamackojoba :-)

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Late-Night Comedians Joke Less About Obama

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 18:00:00 EST

L.A. Times reports that Bush, McCain and Hillary Clinton have all received far more jokes directed at them by late-night comedians than Barack Obama. The study looked at jokes from monologues by comedians Jay Leno, Conan O'Brien, David Letterman, Stewart and Colbert from January 1st to July 31st.

The center found that the network shows broadcast only 169 jokes about Obama, compared with 428 about Bush. McCain drew 328 jokes. Hillary Clinton, who dropped out of the presidential race and much political news in early June, still drew more than twice as many attempted yuk lines (382) as Obama.

On Comedy Central, Obama and McCain were close, with 207 and 201, respectively, while Clinton and Bush nearly tied at 179 and 177, respectively.

Combining the laugh lines from all five shows, Bush was the ... ... most mocked, with 605; Clinton had 562; McCain got 549; and Obama trailed, with 382.

Letterman had the most fun at Clinton's expense, with 146 jokes about her and only 46 about Obama. Leno had the most Bush jokes (208), with Clinton right behind at 204.

Colbert worked McCain over the most, with 129 jokes, compared with 91 for Obama and 79 on Clinton. An example: "It's time the media started trumpeting McCain's exciting story. He's old, and no one likes him."

Here's the total joke received breakdown.

George Bush ... 605

Hillary Clinton ... 562

John McCain ...549

Barack Obama...382

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Dane Cook Doesn't Like His Movie's Poster

Wed, 13 Aug 2008 08:00:00 EST

Comedian Dane Cook is not happy about the movie poster for his upcoming comedy My Best Friend's Girl, which he stars in with Kate Hudson, Alec Baldwin and Jason Biggs. He blogged ten things that are wrong with the heavily photoshopped movie poster on his MySpace page. Here are some highlights.

3. The Stare.
My character apparently has fallen in love with a strand of Kate Hudsons hair. Kate's mannequin is desperately in love with the inside of my right ear while Jason is half stunned, half corsage.

4. Lips:
It looks like I'm wearing Maybelline Water Shine Diamonds Liquid Lipstick. My characters name is now Winter Solstice and I'm a hooker with a heart of gold. Jason is my floral carrying pimp, while Kate is my first trick!

5. Fashion:
My character is sporting a very high collar I mean damn they should be snow capped at that altitude. It's going for the vampire lurking in the castle basement vibe. An Olympic pole vaulter would have a tough go clearing that collar. I'm also able to turn my head comfortably 180 degrees, because I was raised in an abandoned barn by a family of owls.

Read all ten of Cook's poster complaints here. The movie poster is seriously odd - especially that vampire collar. (via Huffington Post)

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