Juice with Junior

When Is the Point of "I Don't Care," the Point of No Return?

2012-05-27T11:32:00.000-04:00

Editor's Note: This is a dating post. For goofy commercials or men doing things without shirts, please see the below posts. Thank you. Oh and Editor's Note within an Editor's Note: I'm aware the title of this post is veering dangerously close to Carrie Bradshaw territory. I apologize. A few years ago, I wrote a post where I said that if I wasn't in a romantic relationship with a man by the time

Happy Birthday, Dani! With BONUS Fleet Week, John Cena, Herndon Monument Climb, Assorted Hotness, Caftans & Zebra Cake Pictures. There Is Literally Too Much!

2012-05-24T09:19:00.000-04:00

Of all the posts I've ever done, I think this one best encapsulates what it's like to live inside my brain, literally. Naturally, it should be a post to celebrate the birthday of long-time blog reader, sister from another mister, Canadian countess, certified glamazon, and forever friend Dani! Okay, I can't promise that this post will make sense to anyone who isn't Dani or I (and it may not

An Open Letter to the National Academy of Television Arts & Sciences Re: Anderson Cooper/Emmys Subject Line: No

2012-05-17T08:01:00.000-04:00

Background: Anderson Cooper (right) premiered a janky new talk show called "Anderson" in September of last year. The Daytime Emmy Award nominations were announced on May 8. At these nominations, "Anderson" received a nomination for Outstanding Talk Show Informative with Cooper receiving a nomination for Outstanding Talk Show Host, among others. The Daytime Emmys are voted on by the National

Paid Programming: Guys, Ever Wanted to Be Slightly Taller to Impress Some Shallow B? Have I've Got the Product for You!

2012-05-14T11:09:00.000-04:00

I saw the below commercial recently and literally have no words ... Okay, we all know that that's not true, but please watch, enjoy, laugh at all the inappropriate parts (I did), and we'll come back... So this is a commercial for a product called Max Tall and they are gel shoe inserts which are designed to lift you up in your shoes to provide you additional inches to your height stop laughing

My Top 10! Clothes I Absolutely, Positively Hate

2012-05-01T13:38:00.000-04:00

Hi, everyone! Sorry I was away for longer than I anticipated. It's what happens when you cannot think of what you want to write about coupled with extreme hunger, which I will explain in a post in the next coming weeks. As for right now, we're talking about clothes and I shall use the top of this post to engage in a bit of shameless self-promotion. The reason I wanted to talk about clothes is

The Second Day The Earth Stood Still: Junior Has Paid Off His Credit Cards Again (And for the Last Time Let Me Tell You)!!!

2012-04-25T14:03:00.000-04:00

Guess what, everybody! I paid off my credit cards! Again... Can you believe it?! Junior, is once again debt free.* (* Student loan debt not included but if anyone wants to include my student loan debt in their next batch of payments to Citibank, feel free!) Let's begin the... Okay, I can feel that a couple of you are looking at me with the side eye all "Junior, didn't we celebrate you paying

My Top 15! Black Entertainers Probably Also Starring in "Think Like a Man" Considering Every Black Person Is in It Already

2012-04-10T19:34:00.000-04:00

Hollywood is a difficult place for black actors and entertainers. Interesting and diverse roles are hard to come by because our representation in the media world is so slim. For some reason, despite it being 2012, people in entertainment still feel like they have to bring people's attention to the fact that black actors don't get the chance to star in movies or their own TV shows even as much as

To B!tch or Not to B!tch? That Is the... Hey, I'm Asking a Question Ovah Heeeere! Real Talk on Romance in 4 Parts...

2012-04-09T07:17:00.001-04:00

Editor's Note: This is a me post about my disastrously comical "dating" life. We will return to the blog with half-naked men and goofy commercials later. I promise.When I was 16, I became a b!tch (I use an exclamation mark in the word because this is still kinda a family blog despite all evidence to the contrary). See, before this age, I spent most of my time doing three things: dreaming of the

Faking Stuff to Make the Newest Crop of Boy Banders Interesting, Now With Less Zzzzzzz Who Again?

2012-04-01T10:04:00.002-04:00

Guess what, everyone! Boy bands are back! Okay, just pause on that thought for a second because I have to talk about the picture at left. Yes, it's that important.So that's 98 degrees, one of my favorite boy bands from the 90s (?) because Jeff Timmons is (still) crazy hot and I was a boy, but after I saw that video with them walking along the beach, I became a man (plus 400 viewings of the end of

Gratuitous Shirtlessness (Yes, It's Back)

2012-03-29T09:10:00.000-04:00

It's Spring. It's finally getting warm in NYC. I am still in heat. Add these things together and you get the return of Gratuitous Shirtlessness, the only blog feature where we watch men do things without shirts. Okay, not the only feature, but the most to the point. Today's video comes to us from fitness gentleman Aaron O'Connell and his chest and his back tat and his sweetly soft voice that

TV Time: "Mad Men" Is Back! Time to Suit Up, Drink Cocktails, and Have Unprotected Sex! Zou Bisou Bisou! With Spoilers!

2012-03-26T13:01:00.005-04:00

Hello, peeps! Season five of critical darling and all around good show, "Mad Men" premiered on Sunday, March 25 at 9 on AMC, which is a channel that you may have, I don't know. I was there wearing a skinny tie, drinking a Gimlet, and festering in the sting of the oppression of people of color in the 1960s.I lightly live-tweeted the premiere at @juicewithjunior. However, let's briefly discuss the

Paid Programming: Gird Your Ovaries, Ladies... and Men Like Me With Imaginary Ones

2012-03-13T11:45:00.002-04:00

So one of my besties and I have decided that I am both in heat and have baby fever. We know I'm in heat because of this and this, and we guessed I have baby fever because I picked up her kitten the other day, cradled it in my arms, and would not let it go. Like I was "Not Without My Daughter" serious about it, and I don't even like cats that much. But it was just so cuuuuute and see, I clearly

Thing You Didn't Realize You Wanted: the Palest Man to Ever Act in a Telenovela Ever in the History of Telenovelas Maybe

2012-03-06T11:18:00.004-05:00

I am so sorry. I had this sitting in my queue waiting to be finished and posted at least a month ago and I got all sidetracked by my love of the personal entertainment video that I forgot to post this the moment I saw it. You may be like "Junior, it's fine. I don't even know what you're talking about." But I promise, that when you do finish the post, you'll quickly change your tune to "B!tch, we

The Ins & Outs, Ups & Downs, Tops & Bottoms, Hats & Gloves Compendium* of the 100 Best & Worst Gay Porn Performers Working Today (Not in Video*)!

2012-03-01T22:40:00.004-05:00

* Pun very much intended** So I'm hoping that the words "gay porn" will alert you to the fact that this post is NSFW. It's also NSFC (Not Safe for Church), NSFB (Not Safe for Brunch), and NSFP (Not Safe for Picnics). Coincidentally, it is SFS (Safe for Starbucks) because everyone looks at porn while sitting in Starbucks. Don't believe me? Huhhh, just march your naive little self down to a

The Lies Gay Men Tell When They're Online Dating. Hint: They're All Lies. All of it. Now With More GIFs!

2012-02-29T15:05:00.000-05:00

I've said this before but I think it bears repeating: if I can't find happiness myself, I will obtain it through helping others avoid the same fate as me. As such, I believe it is my duty to help out my gay male brethren who have uploaded a picture and a paragraph online in the hopes of finding someone compatible for good times.See, I have been amping up my efforts in the dating department

Am I a Hipster? And If I Am, Does Denying It Make Me More of a Hipster? Quandary.

2012-02-28T17:22:00.000-05:00

I am happy to report that my friend Todd has a girlfriend. Yes, no more wondering about the size of his penis for me, because he now has someone new to share his life junk with and also, I am no longer staying at his house thereby putting myself in proximity with his life junk.It's a win win.The girl he's dating, whom we'll call Emily, is nice. I don't not like being around her. She can get a

Welcome to the 2012 Juice with Junior Oscars Live Blog!

2012-02-26T18:16:00.091-05:00

So my phone rings THE MINUTE I am to begin the live-blog! Sorie. I'm at my parent's house because my mom is ill and the phone rings with my father asking about pea soup for her and I'm like CAMMMAN people. I've been taking care of everyone for 2 days. Let me have this! Anyway, I'm here and I'm also here to welcome you to the 2012 Juice with Junior Oscar Live Blog! We are gonna cover the E!

My Top 25! Favorite Homoerotic Photos of Football Players in Anticipation of the Super Bowl I Don't Really Care About In Any Way, Now With Mood Music!

2012-01-31T22:22:00.000-05:00

I have made it abundantly clear over the years that I do not like football.I have made it especially abundantly clear that I do not like the Super Bowl. I have also made it unmistakeably especially abundantly... just kidding. But for serious, football is the worst in terms of gamemanship and also in how it inspires such fervor in people for no reason (something recent events have proven is a very

Question to the World: If You Could Live Inside Any TV Show, Which Would It Be? With a Bonus And Why?

2012-01-26T12:20:00.000-05:00

You guys, can I tell you how much happier I am now that I am watching TV again. It's like wrong how much I missed TV when I was staying in the guest room at my parents' house being forced to watch "Basketball Wives" with my mom in the main room with the TV like I was in a really fancy prison that I could leave and stuff. I love TV. I love it. I LOOOOOVE it. A lot.Anyway, we haven't had a Question

Rag Report: There Is No Contest About Who Won the 2012 Vanity Fair Hollywood Cover So I Won't Waste Your Time...

2012-01-25T11:06:00.000-05:00

Here's the cover:You can see a larger high-res version over at Vanity Fair's website.Normally, I would rank them and be all "this one is good for x,y,z reason and this one is bad for x,y,z reason" but really, the winner is so obvious that I'm gonna stop talking and let her tell you herself:Congrats, Adepero Oduye (above), star of "Pariah," for being the only one in the photo who looks like an

Oscars 2012: Nomination Reactions From Someone Who Hasn't Paid Attention But'll Still Watch With a Tub of Häagen-Dazs

2012-01-24T10:38:00.005-05:00

I will be perfectly honest with you.I haven't really been keeping up with all the Oscar bait movies this year. I saw "The Help," I still have to see "Midnight in Paris" and "The Descendants," but other than that, I'm good. Despite my ambivalence toward the films, I can still indulge in the Oscar derby.Why should the football fans be the only ones to have something to debate over and discuss this

Sh!t [Blank] Say Video MEGAPOST!

2012-01-13T13:34:00.002-05:00

I've been pretty video heavy lately. I don't know if that's a good or bad thing. You'll have to tell me. As I've already started writing the post, there's not much I can do about it now so let's just enjoy, shall we? Today we're talking about those viral online "Sh!t [Blank] Say" Videos that are all the rage on the YouTubes and the Interwebs. If you don't know, these videos are short snippets of

Paid Programming: Black People Are No Longer Necessary, Everybody, So Then That Happened...

2012-01-09T09:53:00.005-05:00

There was a point in time, not too long ago, when businesses wanted to show that they had "street cred" that they would turn to whatever black rapper was bubbling under the mainstream consciousness, have them spit some rhymes about their product, and seem edgy and hip tangentially. Well, those times are over because white people (whom I adore and whose men I have several active crushes on as I

It's Fashion Ad Friday! the Hot or Not? Edition

2012-01-06T10:10:00.001-05:00

Welcome to Fashion Ad Friday, the Hot or Not? Edition. You didn't know it was Fashion Ad Friday, the Hot or Not? Edition today? That's because I just made it up. Alright, the way that this works is that we have a few different fashion ads targeting both men and women and I want to know whether you think the ads are Hot or Not?, meaning is the overall presentation effective, meaning does the ad

Cineplexed: Live-Blogging "Brokeback Mountain"

2011-12-22T23:37:00.003-05:00

Hello one and all to the live-blog of "Brokeback Mountain," one of my very favorite films ever made! If you've never read a movie live-blog before, what it is is basically me commenting on the movie as it happens complete with timestamps and pictures to help you follow along. I suggest that you grab a copy of the movie (and a DVD player natch) and open up the blog at the same time so you can get