Viewfinder | 尋心鏡

The Lost Decade

2011-09-08T12:06:00.000+08:00

(Ok, my bad for completely lacking behind on writing blog posts. Indeed, a lot has happened in the early part of this year.)

The Lost Decade

Thanks to the now presumably dead Osama Bin Laden, I would always remember my first day in the US. It was September 10, 2001, one day before 9/11 occurred. On that September night, I would had never imagined that 1) a terrorist attack would happen the next morning, and 2) I would be spending the next ten years of my life in the US. Not really because I didn’t want to, more because I was 18, who thinks that far when you are a teenager?! (Wow, haven’t used that word in awhile!) You can truly feel your age when you can say ten years passed by in a blink of an eye.

Japan called its worst economic period the lost decade. I’m calling my decade in the US ‘the lost decade’ for a very different reason. It’s ten years that are forever lost in history and memories, never to be taken back or re-lived again. To be honest, I cannot imagine a better place to spend my past ten years. The US was indeed the right place for me to groom myself into adulthood. I met some of my bestest friends but also lost some along the way. I experienced some of my most happiest times and also some of the solemnest moments. Just as Heraclitus rightly said so, “Change is the only constant”, things come to an end while new beginnings sprout. Ten year is indeed a nice whole number to complete my journey in the US.

Boston, I’m afraid we've finally broken up. It has been a bumpy ride but I have to say it was worth every moment. I would not be where I am now without you. But I’m still damn glad that I will no longer be cursed by your never-ending, butt-freezing winters!! ^_-

P.S. Please spare me on writing a Chinese version. I write in Chinese almost everyday now. =P

1.1.11 | 壹壹年.壹月.壹號

2011-01-02T11:21:00.005+08:00

1.1.11

Swoooooosh! There goes another year. HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE!!! This year went by REALLY fast. It seems only yesterday when I wrote this. Let's see how I had done in 2010.

Well, I failed pretty miserably with Project IIIone3, didn't I? Told you Gemini's are NOT known for routines. But I did pretty well with Chinese writing. Although looking back at some of my Chinese posts, I definitely need to polish up on some diction. I'm still pleasantly surprised that I can write in Chinese that makes sense. Before I started writing, the last time I wrote a proper Chinese paragraph (let alone essay) was maybe when I was 14/15, freakin' over 10 years ago!! Doesn't seem like it, does it?

So what's next? After evaluating that doing something everyday is just NOT my thing, I'm thinking to tweak Project IIIone3 a bit for 2011 to better fit my Geminian transient behaviors. I am still very interested in documenting a year in photographs. But that's still work in progress...

I also hope to write at least one blog post per month and to focus more on current affairs. As my posts had pretty blatantly exhibited, 2010 had been quite an emotional roller coaster, hence, the very often 'Chicken soup for the soul' type of entries. But this year I want to write about things that are a lot less affectionate and a lot more controversial. Even I'm tired of my touchy self!

Without further ado, let's roll the curtains up for 2011! ^_-

壹壹年.壹月.壹號

新的一年又開始了！祝大家新年快樂，希望大家過了個充實的2010，也希望2011會更加好！

我想首先回應一下KW同學的'A better year?'。我總覺得二十來歲，常常覺得不安、凡事往往不順意是很理所當然的，如果我們安於現狀，覺得自己已經做得很好，應該不變地繼續下去，那就代表我們對自己的要求太低了吧。Avatar和Titanic的導演James Cameron曾經說過"If you set your goal ridiculously high and it’s a failure, you will fail above everyone else’s success." (如果你達不到為自己定下非常非常高、高到接近不可能的目標，你的失敗已經是別人的成功了。)

凡事總可兩面看，當你認為自己很成功的時候，一山還有一山高，你的成功只不過是別人的小山丘。相反，在你沮喪的時候，別忘記有很多人在山腳正在朝著你的小山丘邁進。

我也認同，不改善自己就改變不了現狀和未來。但不論怎樣改也好，我們都應該繼續不安下去，繼續覺得自己運氣不夠好，繼續努力啊！

(我發誓，這將是我最後一次'Chicken soup for the soul'條目。哈哈！=P)

Randy Pausch | 升呢

2010-10-22T07:47:00.009+08:00

Randy Pausch

Twice. His energy, strength and spirit have brought me out of my self-pitying slump twice. I first found out about the Carnegie Mellon computer science professor's 'Last Lecture' on YouTube when a friend (Thanks, Chih!) posted the link on FB commemorating his life. I had no idea who he was then but was curious. So I clicked.

Blown away. I was absolutely blown away, not particularly with the content of his lecture (To be honest, I think all inspirational speeches give the same or similar message.) but simply with him as a human being.

Having witnessed how cancer can torture one's soul, I believe it takes a real strong character for someone in his conditions to speak the way he did in front of an audience. There was not a single shred of doubt, hate or even pessimism. Pure positive spirit and genuine warmth were what I felt throughout the entire lecture. (LOL It did kind of made me regret not going to CMU for undergrad.) How he had achieved that was seriously beyond my imagination. Everyone has the ability to stay strong and sound optimistic under turmoil but the underlying despair would still somehow unwittingly sieve through. Not with Randy. I could not feel anything negative whatsoever, at least not during those 75 minutes. He was absolutely brilliant!

That was 2 years ago. Randy had gradually migrated to the back of my head. Earlier this year, I was going through some personal insecurities. I admit it. It's the dreaded quarter-life crisis. I don't deny that most people around my age are a bunch of spoil brats, myself included, who think that we deserve everything in the world and that the world should run the way we want it to. When the unfortunate happens, as we like to call it, we whine, complain, say the world is not fair, and feel sorry for ourselves. To be fair, it's hard for us not to think that way. We were, or at least I was, brought up having everything that we wanted in the world and having the world run the way we wanted it to.

Anyway, Randy re-emerged back to my consciousness. I decided to buy his book. I guess a good beating is what I would call the experience of reading his book was. It slapped me out of my insecurities and kicked my self-pitying butt out of the slump. Life once again was back to charging full speed forward. Until...

A brick wall. I am currently hitting a HUGE brick wall, as Randy would call it. A wall that I am not confident I can break through. A wall that, even right now, seems like a never-ending inevitablity. Remember a couple months ago when I said I was craving to feel challenged. Yesterday I would tell you I want to take that ALL back. I don't want to feel challenged anymore. It's too much stress, too many bruises to my ego. I wholeheartedly LOATHE feeling incompetent.

Randy Pausch reappeared. Boy, am I glad I watched his lecture again today. "The brick walls are not there to keep us out; the brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something," was the central theme of his lecture. I asked myself, "How badly do I want this?" Bad. Very very BAD. "Ok. Put your retarded ego aside and go break that wall, JY!!!", I finally got the courage to say to myself.

I highly encourage everyone to either watch his lecture or read his book. (<-- Click on the links to access them.) I actually don't recommend doing both because they are practically the same thing. The book just gives a little more details about his life. I know some people, espeically men, don't believe in these gushy, self-help type of talks. But his lecture is still entertaining and fun to watch even without the emotional aspect. He is just an incredible lecturer! I wish I could have had the chance to attend one in person. RIP, Randy Pausch.

升呢

我這半個"祝星"(LOL 我知道是錯別字，我已說過我的中文是很爛的！)剛剛學懂什麼是"升呢"，我覺得人一定要不斷升呢。其實，香港教育最失敗之處不是填鴨式教育，而是忽略了教導如何做一個有用的人，令到許多現今的港男港女沒有思想、沒有目標、沒有要讓自己升呢的想法和行動。

不過要讓自己升呢是一件很艱苦的事，一定要克服很多次的失敗才能進一小步。看看最近紅爆的林欣彤，她唱完Desperado的時候在幾十萬觀眾面前被Theresa老師罵唱錯key，然後要她當場重唱，當時的難堪和壓力，我想做觀眾的我們是很難想像的。雖然最後都得了冠軍，實至名歸，但也要經歷聲帶發炎的傷痛才能得到，真的得來不易！試問有幾多人可以有這樣的耐力來克服那麼多挑戰呢？！

我也將要面臨很多考驗，其實最難克服的是自己的心魔，不順的時候，有時真的很難向好處想，我要不斷和心魔交戰才能平息那些猜疑和挫敗感，不要讓自己氣餒，身心真的會有點累。

不過無論未來有幾多挑戰、幾多辛酸，我也不會放棄的！我寫這個post不是為告訴大家我未來有很多考驗，而是希望能和大家找到共鳴，鼓勵一下大家要繼續升呢，不要放棄喔！！

The Love of My City | 歸屬感

2010-10-05T14:25:00.004+08:00

The Love of My City

While in Seattle waiting to board my flight back to Boston, images of my past four days in Vancouver were rolling through my mind like a Kaleidoscope. I couldn't stop thinking how much I have missed the city, my childhood friends, and the house and neighborhood that I grew up in.

It suddenly dawned on me that I can attribute the cities that I've lived in like lovers that I've fallen in love with. Here's how I'd attribute them:

Vancouver = The first love that I'll never forget. The city that contains my happiest memories. After leaving it for over a decade, I'm still in love with it!

San Diego = An ex-lover that I'm now best friends with. SD reminds me of the hardworking and ambitious self during my college days. I only wish that motivation and passion in me never die down.

Hong Kong = An ex-lover that I barely talk to. Never was, is and will probably never be a big fan of it; even though, technically, it is my true hometown. I never really feel like I belong there.

Boston = A lover that I'm still trying to breakup with. I've definitely met some great friends here but still doesn't beat the hardships that I went through. I'm sure years down the road, I'll look back on this 'relationship' and appreciate every bit of it. But right now, my loathe is blinding me from doing so. >_<

What do you think? Not a bad comparison, huh? ^_-

歸屬感

閻奕格說她從小就移民到不同的國家，覺得好像哪裡都擠不進去，不知道自己屬於哪裡。其實我多少也可以感同身受，數數看，在我人生裏我也在四個很不同的城市生活過。我覺得歸屬感與我們在每個城市裏的經歷有莫大關係，閻奕格覺得寂寞很可能是她在每個地方都經歷過很多辛酸，每次花了很久才適應到新的環境，但沒多久又要搬家了，很難定下來靜靜地過日子。

我不太喜歡在波士頓和香港的生活，大概都是因為類似的原因吧。不知為何在這兩個城市裏都經歷到很多風風雨雨和避不了的是非，很無辜和無奈地掉進很戲劇化的糾纏，讓我非常厭倦在這裡的生活。相反，我非常享往在溫哥華和聖地亞哥的日子，因為過得很寧靜，沒有大起大跌，很少是非，讓我能享受到平靜的幸福，真的很懷念啊！~_~

如果對一個地方的回憶都是擠滿無奈和辛酸，我們很難對那個地方產生歸屬感。歸根究底，其實所有關係都歸咎於緣份，沒什麼能控制得到我們在不同地方的經歷，我們只能用緣份來解釋為何在這裡碰到某某，或在那個地方遇上某些事，我也只能求神拜佛地想我和波士頓應快緣盡了吧！>_<

My Morning Coffee | 我被遺棄了

2010-08-10T09:06:00.004+08:00

My Morning Coffee

This morning was such a tragic morning. I found out that my MOST FAVORITE morning coffee place has permanently closed down. I was in shock! I stood in front of the store dumbfounded, trying to peek through the windows to find any sign of renovations, indicating that it was only a temporary shut down. But there was nothing. 90% of the store had been cleared out. People passing by was staring at me wondering what the heck was wrong with me. Then tears started rolling.... Just kidding! I'm not that big of a drama queen... heh

But still it literally feels like someone just broke up with me. My morning coffee from Peet's is the one thing that I look forward to every morning when I wake up and what keeps me going throughout the day. Yes, I am in love with this coffee. (Well, more like it's my ecstasy, coke, weed, whatever drug you'd like to call it.) It somehow puts me into an awesomely good mood every morning that lasts the entire day, which no coffee from anywhere else can do.

But now it has left me. I have nothing to look forward to when I wake up. The coming winter looks so grim! The thought of getting warmed up by Peet's coffee is what pulls me out of bed during those bleak, gloomy days. How am I going to survive this coming winter?! T_T

我被遺棄了

咖啡對我來說一直只是用來解決我的睡魔，不是因為喜歡喝而喝，直到嚐到Peet's的咖啡，喝第一口就愛上它了。它比其他品牌的咖啡濃郁得多，味覺上有很厚的層次感，有點像紅酒品種裏的Cabarnet Sauvignon吧，有人嫌它太苦澀，我就覺得剛剛好，苦澀裏帶點甘香，是其他咖啡做不到的效果。在嚴寒的早晨裏，拿著暖暖的一杯，一口一口地喝著，暖胃又提神，真的能讓我暫時忘記那灰溜溜的天空。

可是，好景不常，在我辦公室附近的Peet's突然倒閉了！我的天啊！為什麼要把我在Boston那可惡的冬天裏唯一的快樂帶走呢？！我現在的感覺好像被情人遺棄了，前路茫茫，不知將要來臨的冬季會怎樣過。難道真的要我這個大懶蟲，每天早點起床自己做Peet's咖啡。快樂是否永遠都有限期的？~_~

Happiness = Stress?! | 遲來的春天

2010-07-17T05:58:00.002+08:00

Happiness = Stress?!

Today, I received one of the best news in a llllooonnngggg time. But what I find surprising was that the amount of satisfaction and happiness that the news brought upon is directly proportional to my stress level. The happier I am, the more stress I'm feeling. Shouldn't they be inversely proportional? ~_~ (Gosh, how more nerdy can I be using "proportionality" to describe life?! =P)

In any case, I really treasure what I have earned today. It is a result of years of sweat, diligence and, sometimes, tears. I just hope good fortune keeps rolling my way because I'll be needing A LOT of it for the next 10 months!

遲來的春天

四年的努力終於有成果了，差點以為這個遲來的春天永遠都不會來，想不到它在我最需要它的時候來臨，生命的起伏真的很難預計，但依然不可鬆懈，將要開始學習管理的理念了。 ^_^

Cristo Rey Boston

2010-07-14T05:43:00.004+08:00

At the beginning of this year I started volunteering for a catholic high school specialized in admitting underprivileged kids. I work with the business development director to look for corporate sponsors for their work-study program. If you are interested in finding out more about the program, please contact me! =)

Anyway, two weeks ago they had a networking event and asked me to be the photographer. To be honest, I was quite skeptical about how the pictures would turn out. As you all know I'm horrible at capturing people. I think it turned out just ok. People really are tough to catch, especially in indoor lighting. I think my best snaps are the ones not focused on people. LOL!

Corridor leading up to the event venue

Poster for the event

Reception desk & the 2 lovely ladies from CRB playing receptionists for the event

Prize for raffle draw: gift certificate from Gargoyles on the Square @ Davis Square

Details of this event will be published on a Boston local Spanish newspaper, El Mundo. Not sure which pictures they end up choosing to be published but I'm stoked to find out! =P

A Little Bit of Innocence on Tuesdays | Blessing

2010-07-14T01:43:00.006+08:00

A Little Bit of Innocence on Tuesdays (Part II)

Leadership is the most common theme amongst all business school applications. Describe a time when you have exhibited leadership, tell me how you had led and motivated others blah blah blah, but I say the ultimate display of leadership is when you can hold undivided attention from all, I repeat, ALL 20 five-year-olds for more than five minutes, actually three will probably make you a rockstar (to kids that is).

If you fail to lead a group of adults, it can, to a small extent, be attributed to someone else's lack of responsibility. We inherently assume that everyone is a responsible individual because we have been taught to be for years. Your failure is partly a result of someone else's inadequacy in following through with his/her responsibilities. This also holds true the opposite way. Your success as a leader stems from your team members' diligence in completing their allocated tasks.

On the other hand, your success and failure to hold a group of five-year-olds' attention is entirely based on you. They have yet to learn to be responsbile individuals, which is to sit still and listen. Their short attention span is not a consequence of ADHD but purely because of the nature of being a kid. They start talking about chocolate when you are telling them about flowers is simply because you are b-o-r-i-n-g.

After my 2nd meeting with the class, I quickly learned that not only must I go with the flow of their questions and remarks, otherwise I lose their attention, but must also steer their focus to the scope of our activity, otherwise the activity would go nowhere. Easier said than done, just like everything in life worth doing.

I know it sounds cliche but what they say about how much you learn from working with kids are all indeed true. I learn how to be truly innovative, none of the thinking outside of the box crap, as in the sky is the limit type of innovation. I learn how to really flex mental agility, with 10 million questions ranging from how come the sky is blue to are you going to bring us candies all coming at you at once, well you get the idea. But honestly, best of all, I learn how to indulge in being a kid again. And boy, did that feel gooooood! ^____^

So have I become their rockstar, you ask? Well I got them to do this...

which is rockstar enough to moi! >_^

(Took me almost 3 months to post part II partially because I haven't upload the picture above to my computer until, well, today and partially because, as always, laziness. =P)

Blessing

兩個多月不見，怎麼中文的標題是英文"Blessing"？是否忘了怎樣寫中文？說真的，要我用中文寫作其實是件很困難的事，我是在國際學校長大的"西港女"喔！(如看見錯別字，請告訴我，多多指教!^_^) 用"Blessing"是因為最近小女子對一段陳年往事有些新啟發。

好心和愚笨的我，好玩唔玩，玩做媒人，結果變成兩男一女的局面。（我已說了"愚笨的我"，這點你不用再提醒我。）得米的男子對我說想得到沒得米的男子的"Blessing"(祝福)，如果可以舊事從演的話，我會這樣回答他...

得米男: I want his blessing.
小女子: Blessing? Why is that even necessary? You are already dating her. In fact, the best blessing that YOU can give him is not to happily show up with her in front of him to make him feel like a loser because you got her and he didn't. Give him some time to recuperate his now hurt ego.

中文版

得米男: 我想得到他的祝福。
小女子: 祝福？需要嗎？你已得到美人歸，幹嘛要人家的祝福？相反，你不在他面前大搖大擺地和美人一臉幸福的出現是對他最大的祝福。
(看，中文一句，一針見血，能代替英語的好幾句，這是我一直以來堅持要學寫中文的原因。)

要是當時有這樣的智慧，坦蕩蕩的告訴他，他這樣的想法害人又不利己，無聊到極，能否讓他想清楚第二日就歡喜地帶著美人去找沒得米男要他的"Blessing"是多麼的無聊和殘忍？

你想說，往事已過，何需從提呢？因剛過去的週末碰見了得米男和他的"美人"，撩起了這段一直讓我有點遺憾的往事，總覺得整件事情可以處理得有體面一些。我是一個習慣反思的人，會在自己的過去找出能做得更好的地方，好讓未來遇到類似事件時，能處理得更恰當。經一事，長一智吧！智慧是從經歷裏磨練出來的，就如下次要我做媒人我也會三思、三思... =P

Numero VIIsix - VIIIzero

2010-04-22T11:27:00.003+08:00

What is Project IIIone3?

Numero VIIthree - VIIfive

2010-04-21T10:52:00.002+08:00

Standpipes & Jibsy

Numero VIIzero - VIItwo

2010-04-20T12:10:00.003+08:00

A Little Bit of Innocence on Tuesdays | 幸福

2010-04-19T20:35:00.004+08:00

A Little Bit of Innocence on Tuesdays (Part I)

I used to be a teaching assistant back in college. Standing in front of a lecture hall full of students to conduct review sessions before exams sounded scary but was really neither intimidating nor difficult. More than half of them barely went to lectures and probably hadn't even cracked open their books yet, so for sure I knew more than they did. As for the diligent ones who could actually call you out on your mistakes and God-forbid your stupidity, they didn't attend review sessions. LOL!

With the confidence from my TA experiences under my belt, I proudly trod into a classroom of 20 five-year-olds. As I hear myself happily articulate, "Hello class, how are you all doing?", my brain came to a striking HALT. I had absolutely no clue what to say next. My job was to teach this kindergarten class the concept of money. What I didn't realize was that for the past 10 years of my life, my language surrounding money had been checking accounts, credit cards, financial crisis, sugardaddy (joking!) etc, none of which a five-year-old could comprehend.

I smile.... , and smile... , and finally reluctantly admit defeat, "I am the volunteer who will be talking to you about money for the next five weeks. I'll be back next Tuesday. See you all then!" and swiftly left the classroom. I thought I could wing the introductory meeting without looking at the volunteer manual, like I could when I was a TA. Never thought a bunch of five-year-olds could crush my ego in a way that a group of twenty-year-olds couldn't. O such irony...heh =P

As the next few weeks progressed, I grew to wholeheartedly luvvvvvvv my time with them. They probably taught me more than I did to them. I was surprised at how I had completely forgotten what it was like to be a kid. Gestures like openly expressing likes/dislikes, saying whatever comes to mind, crying when you don't get what you want, yelling to grab attention, had long been suppressed in my adult psyche. I felt carefree and, in a way, safe to be around them. It made me ponder a lot about the adult world, the amount of emotions that we suppress, the amount of lies that we deceive. Is the so-called adult world really the more "mature" way to live? ~_~

(To be continued...)

幸福

(有看開我的博客都知道，我通常用中和英語講同一個主題，但這次有點不同，因為英文的主題想不到中文該怎寫，中文的主題也是一樣，所以這次就張兩個不同的話題拼在一起。)

我沒有看臺灣偶像劇的習慣，我唯一看過的就只有"流星花園"，所以看"下一站，幸福"真的是因為無聊，沒有太大期望，完全想不到會讓我如此著迷。

忘了聽誰的訪問說過，壞人的角色要夠狠毒才能讓觀眾看得投入。"下"裏沒有狠毒的壞人但就有可憐得很的主角，相信是"下"成功的關建吧。(不是因為我喜歡便算成功，wiki 說它是臺灣偶像劇史上最高平均收視第二位，僅次於"命中注定我愛你"。<-- 沒有看過，不知有多好看。) 故事想帶出幸福來得不易的信息，雖然下站是幸福但這一站的距離其實很遙遠，中途還有突如其來的停站。其實情節沒什麼特別，經過許多波折最終還是大團圓結局，但不知為何仍害我哭得很厲害喔！=P

二十幾歲、快到"中女"年齡的我，開始明白幸福的背後原來是許多無可形容的忍耐、辛酸和堅持，淚水、汗水流過、灑過才能握得住一點點的幸、一絲絲的福，但我享往這種過程，不失落過、氣餒過、跌過、痛過又怎能珍惜最終獲來的幸福呢。

要不是光晞從醫院逃跑出來苦苦哀求含著淚的慕橙留下來，要不是小樂嚎哭呼叫著他的外星人爸爸不要離開，到結局看到他們幸福快樂地嬉戲又怎能讓你由心裡開心地笑起來呢！

幸福不是必然，但我相信只要努力地，堅忍地朝著自己的夢想走，必定找到我們幸福的天地。

大家，努力吧！無論多遠，下一站便是幸福！^o^

Numero VIseven - VInine

2010-04-16T11:15:00.005+08:00

Can you see Jibsy?

What is Project IIIone3?

Black & White Philadelphia

2010-04-15T11:13:00.000+08:00

(This is long overdue...)

Always want to create a travel/photojournalism type of thing to capture the essence of a place. The only problem is I'm not very good at capturing people and the people makes a huge part of the essence of a place. Nonetheless, here is my architectural report...

Benjamin Franklin's house in Philly:

The most distinctive architecture in Philly are the city hall and independence hall. I tried to stay away from the typical head on shot and went askew.

City Hall

City Hall close-up

Independence Hall

I have a fetish with abandoned buildings. It's their ruggedness that gives them a lot of texture and make for a striking picture.

This is where I had dinner on South Street, and South Street was certainly very interesting.

Philly is a rather artsy city. A lot of paintings on the sides of buildings, which I believe are called "murals".

Arts Bank, I suppose?

Numero VIfive & VIsix

2010-04-15T09:50:00.003+08:00

Which one do you like better?

Numero VItwo - VIfour

2010-04-14T09:02:00.007+08:00

Moshi, moshi?

Seafood gumbo!

Yes, Jibsy, I know "you are here".

What is Project IIIone3?

Numero Vtwo - VIone

2010-04-13T11:18:00.000+08:00

You must have thought I have quit on Jibsy, didn't you? Sorry to disappoint but nope! Jules Y will never quit on Jibsy. She just gets super, duper, uber lazzzzzzzzzyyyyyyyyy with it and Jibsy isn't happy about it either. >_<

Anyway, without further ado... Jibsy is back!

To a certain extent, taking a long break isn't so bad, at least I feel I am capturing better photos. (hehe excuses, excuses!) Don't you agree? >_^

What is Project IIIone3?

Numero Vone

2010-04-12T07:00:00.002+08:00

Did you all miss Jibsy?!

(sent from my iphone)

Chopin | 蕭邦

2010-03-24T00:04:00.000+08:00

Chopin

Benjamin Zander played Chopin's Prelude in E Minor (listen to it at the bottom of the post) at his TED talk. It made me fell in love with Chopin all over again. For those that can recall, his various compositions were played throughout Roman Polanski's "The Pianist". The lonesome, depressing scenes overlaid with Chopin's melodic backdrop made the movie dishearteningly beautiful! (It, indeed, stole a lot of my tears. T_T)

It makes me wonder how many Asian kid really understands Chopin when they are feverishly practicing his pieces because their parents want them to learn the piano. Moreover, how many piano teachers would take the time explaining Chopin like the way Mr. Zander did? Honestly, if my piano teacher did, I would definitely had appreciated the piano a lot more, thus, would had actually spent time practicing it. >_^

The piano is not simply for playing and practicing. It should be enjoyed, relished and understood. Aren't we disrespecting all the great composers if we are playing their music only because we want to pass the Royal whatever of music? Hmm...I don't really see what so "royal" about that.

蕭邦

非常非常喜歡蕭邦的前奏曲第四號，那股時快時慢的旋律穿梭於憂怨的琴聲中能直達心堪裏，不禁令心房悸悸疼起來。聽過許多古典樂曲，都沒有首能讓我更有感覺 (也許是我的古典音樂知識不夠豐富吧。=P)，難怪在云云音樂家中周杰倫視他為偶像。

你也來感受一下吧。。。

Prelude in E Minor, Op. 28, No. 4 by Frédéric François Chopin

Lost Love | 親人

2010-03-17T08:07:00.005+08:00

Lost Love

Accidentally stumble upon this today...

Dearest You,

I am sorry. You must have felt like you've been abandoned and discarded. If I tell you now that it was never my intention to do so, it'll probably sound superficial. To be honest, neither did I realize how much it broke your heart. I was tired of the relationship, tired of being "we". I guess I wanted freedom, freedom to be myself and pursue my own dreams.

I truly wish I can still be by your side, be there with you through your sorrows and happiness. I honestly do, regardless of how ridiculous it sounds. I wish I had the strength to be the one who will always stand by you. But, unfortunately, I don't and I am truly sorry for it.

I hope you've found that person. I did loved you with all my heart and neither you or I can deny it. I still do but no longer as lovers. I wish you all the best in life and hope that some cosmic forces will bring this blessing to you.

With all of my heart,

Me

親人

"做我最親密的親人
不是誰的情人誰的某某某

讓我還敢做我的夢
做我夢中偉大的微笑的英雄"

仍然沉醉在"下一站，幸福"的幸福裏，超愛插曲"親人"，看了歌詞更愛極了，上面的幾句很能代表我的心情。雖是女孩子的博客，但到現在還沒談過感情事，其實我不太喜歡講，總覺得兩個人的事沒必要向其他人交代，更加無需說出什麼對愛的偉大言論，每個人對愛情都有他的看法，沒有對和錯、好和不好。但看了"親人"的歌詞有些想法還是想說出來，因為太喜歡這首歌了。

可能曾經結束了一段頗長的關係，領悟到愛情不是熱情、激情能維持到，也不是什麼天長地久的誓言，或者是找全世界最棒的愛人。這首歌說出不要被愛情的感覺蒙騙了，忘了真正愛一個人其實只是要在他身邊默默地支持、守護著他。

"做我最親密的親人，不是誰的情人，誰的某某某"

我覺得說得很貼切，愛人就如親人，不是為了拍拖已拍拖，或做某某的男/女朋友已在一起。一直以來我都想找個能

"讓我還敢做我的夢，做我夢中偉大的微笑的英雄"

很天真吧？我其實真的不是什麼事業型的女強人，只不過對愛還抱住天真單純的態度吧。=P

Numero IVnine, Vzero

2010-03-05T09:26:00.000+08:00

Jibsy gets real bored watching me study and so do I...

(sent from my iphone)

Hope | 夢想

2010-03-04T14:22:00.006+08:00

Hope

Recently, I have started mentoring two very intelligent and motivated high school seniors (my "Posses"). They have already been accepted to college and earned an almost free ride for their next four years. They sure have a very bright future ahead of them. From the bottom of my heart, I wish them the very very best and hope they grow to become mentors for my kids' generation, just like I to them. =)

Veered off a little, flattering about how great my two Posses are, anyway, the reason I'm writing this is because I realize I find in them, what I think I have almost lost, the motivation and, more importantly, hope for the future.

We talk a lot about their future college life. As I try to recall my college heydays, I begin reminiscing all the little things that made those years so unique. I remember how I used to pull all-nighters a few nights in a row right before exams aiming for that A+. Yes, A PLUS! That's right! I am one of those anal retentive, freakishly ambitious nerd that always score the highest and pulled up the curve. Don't you hate people like me? JKJK! (I sure do loathe them!) The consecutive all-nighters were the result of my extraordinary ability to dupilcate homeworks, amazing talent at daydreaming in lectures and rigorous discipline to keep my books looking brand new; in other words, laziness. heh

Nonetheless, do not underestimate those few nights of motivation. Knowing that you know that you know almost don't know anything can do some serious damage to your psyche. When you are at the bottommost part of the well, the will to climb out of it trumps any barriers, high or wide, sharp or tough, blocking you from doing so. They definitely got me through my two college degrees (and I must confess earned me a few A+'s along the way too). >_^

After graduation, there are times I really wish to feel that rush again. But being in the working world, there really is no avenues for me to feel THAT much pressure to be THAT driven in such a short period of time. Stress from work feels totally different.

Well, I am happy to say that is about to change. With GMAT coming up (o I really don't want to start counting down the days >_<), I am beginning to feel the adrenaline and anxiousness that once overwhelmed my tiny, lazy brain. Moreover, while my posses dwell on their future college days, my daydreams lately have been surrounding business plans, internships, travelling to developing countries etc, activities that I plan to do in my future school days.

ah the feeling of hope! Almost forgotten but never lost, whoever says dreams are for kids? Innocent naiveness is what makes life worth living for.

夢想

好奇怪，中國人很少談夢想，我的中史固然爛但就真沒聽過中國偉人講夢想，外國人就聽得多了，Martin Luther King是很好的例子。也許是中國人現實的想法吧，認為勤勞地做好本份是最實際，不要糊思亂想。也許在美國久了，受了他們浮誇的習族感染，總覺得做一下白日夢，久不久糊思亂想一通真的很不錯，很多偉大的發明都是這樣子發展出來的。

中國人最欠缺的是 Creativity（創造力），我們除了抄襲他人的產品最有創造力之外，真正做創作、發明的人真的少之有少，不做夢、不亂想、不放手做些天馬行空的事又怎樣啟動創造力呢！我們是否應該改一改我們保守的想法呢？

下次聽到孩子跟你說他想在月球搭房子，可否不要笑一笑隨便敷衍他說聲"傻瓜"，可否靜心地細想究竟在月球怎樣能興建房子呢? 然後和他談論一下，可能為你帶來一些驚喜或啟發吧。

"世事無絕對，只有真情趣。" (已經忘記是那個商品的廣告口號了。=P)

Numero IVseven & IVeight

2010-03-04T10:15:00.000+08:00

I luvvvvvvv the iPhone Photoshop app!!

(sent from my iphone)

Numero IVfive, IVsix

2010-03-03T11:07:00.005+08:00

Did I mention that I'm horrible at keeping a habit? O and did I also mention that I like to procrastinate?? heh -____-

I know I know, I am N days behind. So from today on I'll take two a day until I make up for the N days that I've missed. >_^

What is Project IIIone3?

Numero IVfour

2010-02-21T12:38:00.001+08:00

Greetings from Philly!

(sent from my iphone)