It’s a milestone. Kind of a big one, although I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because 30 seems so…adult. So…old? Nah. I don’t feel old. I mean, I’ve been living like a grandma for years, but I feel great.

Nevertheless, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting on this birthday. Kind of evaluating my life, and I’ve come to the conclusion that it is fantastic. I’m healthy. I’m married to a man with a heart of gold who loves me like I never dreamed I would be loved. We have an adorable, healthy baby who gives us endless joy. We have amazing families who are our best friends. I have a steady job that is challenging and fulfilling. These and many, many other blessings.

My life isn’t perfect. I wish we were out of debt and had money to travel and save for retirement and Meredith’s future. I wish I didn’t have to work so much and that my job wasn’t so far away. I wish I had more time for hobbies. I wish I could figure out how to cook on a regular basis. Like anyone, my relationships have their struggles. But all of these things are trivial compared to the good in my life.

I wish I was at a point where I could make some concrete goals for the next year, or even month – but I’m trying to be true to myself and right now I know that would just stress me out. I’m happy with the way things are going, though. I’m doing really well documenting life lately – I’ve started Project Life, am taking lots of photos, capture at least one good thing a day as well as writing down what happened that day. I’ve lost over half of the weight I gained while pregnant and am back into my pre-pregnancy clothes. I find time to read. I soak up my time with David and Meredith. We are looking hard for a new church.

I’m just really, really happy to be alive. And I think thirty is going to be the best year yet.

***

1 – A quiet morning just Meredith and me, and an easy drive home from Irving where we spent NYE.

2 – David making dinner.

3 – Rocking Meredith to sleep and watching her just lie in my lap, doze, nurse, and smile.

4 - Prayer time while pumping & being filled with joy and peace.

5 – Dinner at Scott & Vanessa’s with the whole family.

6 – A patient (another RN) complimenting my needlestick technique, starting a difficult IV, and Meredith napping on my lap when I picked her up from Grammy’s house.

7 – The Texans winning their first playoff game on David’s birthday; my good friend Carmen’s wedding.

8 – Forbes birthday dinner (for David, my sister-in-law, and my nephew).

9 – Getting through the day as charge nurse without any problems; finishing and truly enjoying The Marrige Plot.

10 – An argument with David turning into a good conversation about how we can show our love better.

11 - The whole evening at home with David.

12 – Meredith’s milk experiment (giving less per feeding with snacks in between if needed) going well at daycare; David making Meredith laugh a lot before bed.

13 - Doing a crossword puzzle at lunch.

14 – Getting the house cleaned; Meredith napping in my lap.

15 - Going to a church that David and I both liked.

16 - A nice evening with David: sitting down to dinner together and helping each other with chores.

17 – Finishing a book; Meredith nursing to sleep in my lap (apparently this is one of my favorite things).

18 – My niece Lily was born! Ending the day with some paper crafting.

19 - Meredith actually swallowing a bite of banana.

20 – Relaxing on the couch with David; scrapbooking research.

21 - Brunch with my good friend Lauren at Happy Fatz.

22 – Mom’s birthday lunch with the whole family.

23 - Taking Meredith’s 6-month pictures & video – she was in such a good mood!

24 – Bell-ringing ceremony (for completing chemo) for one of my favorite patients.

25 - Slow day at work and being able to leave 2 hours early.

26 – Meredith falling asleep so quickly at night.

27 - Meredith laughing when I kissed her all over.

28 – Making a lot of progress organizing the craft room.

29 – Church legacy celebration.

30 – Putting Meredith’s hair in pigtails and seeing everyone’s reactions to how cute it is.

31 – Meredith playing in her crib alone and falling back asleep, providing me with time to work on my cross stitch project.

The Turn of the Screw is an intense psychological tale of terror. It begins in an old house on Christmas Eve. It is the story of a Governess who comes to live with and take care of two young children. The Governess loves her new position in charge of the young children, however she is soon disturbed when she begins to see ghosts.

>Ergo baby carrier (mine is in sienna sunset.) - I’ve tried a few slings and wraps and such, but this is my carrier of choice. We couldn’t use it until Meredith could hold her head up well, but there is an infant insert if you want to use it earlier. Anyway, I love that it goes over both shoulders and has tons of lower back support, I love that all you do is clip her in, I love all the pockets, I just love it. I find it very easy to put on and much faster than the stroller for quick errands. Meredith is happy in it, too.

>iHome. Our nightly routine that usually works is that we bathe and change Meredith, then around 7:30 I sit down with her in the rocker, dim the lights, and nurse her. Hopefully she falls asleep and I place her in the crib, and I go about my business. We use this iHome to play this album of lullabies for her. It changes colors (although we don’t use that feature much, it’s still neat), is small and cute, and has good sound. We actually used the seahorse for awhile, which worked great too, but sometimes I need more than 5 minutes of music, and with this I can just leave it on repeat. We do take the seahorse with us if we’re traveling though!

>Video monitor. We have this really nice one thanks to some generous church ladies, and it’s been great. We use it after we put Meredith down for the night. We set the big screen next to our living room TV, and thanks to the open layout of our house we can see it from the kitchen and laundry room. I take the handheld set with me into the craft room if I’m going to spend some time in there. Anyway, we need the video because with the music playing in the room the sound monitor is all thrown off. And our house is big enough that I might not hear her if I’m not close by.

>Jumperoo. We are borrowing this from a friend, and I am so grateful for it. Meredith loves it to pieces and it’s extremely adorable to watch her bounce up and down and play with the toys. We use it almost every evening while we do chores to get ready for the next day.

>Teethers. She doesn’t have any teeth yet, but she certainly loves to chew and drool. We use these things constantly, along with bibs. (But we haven’t gotten into any serious teething yet, so no recommendations there!)

Meredith woke me up at 5 a.m. and I managed to stay in bed with her until around 6. We got up, I had coffee and oatmeal, and we played. I sat with her on the couch and finished a book while she chewed on her toys. It was good.

Then I cleaned the kitchen. I knew I’d feel better once that was done. I tidied up the living room, but that didn’t take long. I thought that I needed to sweep the floor, do laundry, and vacuum, but I didn’t feel like it right then. Meredith needed attention.

I picked her up and we walked around the house. We went into the extra room that I use for an office/craft room, and my head began spinning. I want to organize it. I want to work on several creative projects. I want to purge our house of the things we don’t need. I want to clean it from top to bottom. I want to read more books. I want to catch up on blogs and write and take pictures. I want to cook more and exercise. But I just have one day of free time, and Meredith needs me frequently. What should I do?

I walked out of the craft room. I sat down to write this. The dogs are barking and it is annoying me. I feel on edge. Anxious for no reason. I’m going to take a shower now, to clear my head.

I chose one of Meredith’s newborn pictures, a closeup of her face in black and white (taken by my good pal Cio). I was going for a more abstract look. The one I got is 8×10, and here’s how it turned out:

I was really pleased! I can’t wait to hang it up with a few other things I’ve collected to start building a gallery wall here.

Anyway, I was quite impressed with the website. It’s extremely simple to use and guides you through step-by-step. It’s very clear how much everything costs and what options you have. The preview function is so helpful, too. There are lots of options for your photos, and the quality is very good. I can’t speak to how true the color is because I went for black and white, though.

You can go create your own photos on canvas here, and be sure to “like” them on Facebook for 50% off your next order AND free shipping. It’s a great deal, seriously. (Here’s the Facebook link: Easy Canvas Prints.)

Anyway, since I really do like this product, I feel great about giving one away! Just fill out the Rafflecopter form below, and let me know if you have any questions!

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She:

>Weighs 18 pounds even and is 26.5 inches long, which is 75th percentile for both. She wears all 6-12 month clothes now. Nice and chubby!

>Is so grabby and purposeful with her movements now! She can pick things up, pull things toward her, and manipulate them in her hands much better. I especially love when she’s nursing, her free hand reaches up and plays with my hair, twirling it, caressing it, and eventually yanking it. However, she has also tumped an entire glass of water over at restaurants twice now. I am learning my lesson!

>Can basically sit up on her own now, although we still have to watch her because she’ll get distracted and topple.

>Makes all kinds of new sounds, and enjoys being extremely vocal when she wakes up in the morning.

>Sometimes starts crying around certain people, like David’s father and grandfather. I don’t know why she’s scared of them! But she warms up to them again very soon so it’s not too bad. It’s also unbearably cute to see her lower lip jut out when she’s afraid.

>Enjoys playing with toys (especially her new Jumparoo) and throwing them down on the ground too. She cracks up when we play Patty Cake!

>No longer sucks her two fingers. I can’t believe that phase was so short; it was the cutest thing and I miss it.

>Sits in the high chair for meals with us sometimes. We’ve tried giving her some food, and once she swallowed a bit of banana, but she’s mostly uninterested.

>Has a new baby cousin as of January 18 named Lily! I’m so excited that they’re going to grow up together and I hope they become good friends. Lily is tiny and perfect, and I absolutely cannot believe that Meredith was ever that small, and so recently.

I:

>Am dreading the start of solid foods. I keep postponing it. I want to do Babyled weaning, but even that low-stress approach is overwhelming to me. Breastfeeding (even with pumping at work!) has just been so easy for us, and even though I plan to continue for a good while I’d rather not have another thing to think about.

>Made up a little game where I say, “All aboard the Mermaid Express!” then I bounce her up and down on my knee making train sounds. She smiles every single time we start to say all aboard! She also for some reason really loves it when David sings “Mama said knock you out” by LL Cool J.

>Still love cloth diapers. We use mostly Fuzzibunz but I was surprised at how much I love the Flip system and want to get more of them.

>Have gotten serious about losing all the weight I gained, mostly because I want to fit in my old clothes again. I started counting calories a couple weeks ago using My Fitness Pal, and it’s definitely working. The first few days were SO hard, but my body has already adjusted a lot. I feel much better, am less bloated, and no longer need as much food to feel full. So far I haven’t noticed a change in my milk supply, either.

>Exercised for the first time since before I was pregnant (shameful) over the weekend by doing the 30-day Shred. I nearly passed out and am soooo sore now.

>Am still looking for a new church. We’ve tried out two different places fairly thoroughly, and neither feels quite right to us, although they both have great things about them. It’s hard because I’m ready to settle into a new place and get connected, but I want it to be right.

>Haven’t been as emotional or anxious this month as last. I think a lot of it is because I’m learning how to take care of myself better now; how to avoid my triggers and how to train my thoughts.

>Am planning on starting Project Life on my next birthday in two weeks. I’ve become kind of obsessed with it. I wish I had known about it before the new year, but I’m not going to stress. I’m just excited to get into a nontraditional, consistent way of scrapbooking that won’t take TOO much effort. The Smash Book is fun to carry around and collect scraps, and I’ll still use that for random things, but Project Life will be more of a reflection of the day to day.

>Can’t get enough of holding Meredith. Even if I just put her down for a minute, I’m always so excited to pick her back up again.

>Want to have more babies, but I kind of wish I could just have Meredith all over again.

For reference:

No months
One month
Two months
Three months
Four months
Five months

All in all, I completed 65 out of 101 goals, which I think is pretty good. Several more goals are in process, many don’t really apply to my life right now, and some of them just aren’t a priority at this time.

I don’t plan to make a new list right now. Goals really work for me though, so I’m thinking about what to do next. I might make a list for the first year of my 30′s, or maybe I’ll start monthly goals. Not sure, but I’m looking forward to figuring it out.

Here’s my final list. Items in bold are completed, items in italics are still in process.

FOOD

1. Shop at a farmer’s market.
2. Cook dinner once a week for a month. (4/4)
3. Cook something with my Crockpot.
4. Be a vegetarian for a month.
5. Make David’s lunch three times a week for a month. (4/4)
6. Compile a recipe book of go-to meals.

FITNESS

7. Do a bike race.
8. Run another 5k.
9. Join a yoga studio.
10. Do a Wii Fit body test once a week for twelve weeks. (12/12)
11. Buy a nice pedometer and wear it at work.
12. Buy ankle weights and start wearing them at work twice a week.

HEALTH & BEAUTY

13. Spend an entire day at the spa.
14. Buy three new pairs of heels. (3/3)
15. Drink 64 oz. of water a day for a week.
16. Find the perfect mascara.
17. Get my teeth whitened.
18. Transition to all-natural personal care products.
19. Try microdermabrasion.

FINANCIAL

20. Pay off my credit card bill.
21. Put at least $1000 in my IRA.
22. Refinance the house.
23. Transfer my old 401k.
24. Implement a system for David and I to save our change.

COMPUTER AND INTERNET

25. Back up all of my computer files. 
26. Learn CSS/HTML/PHP well enough to design and run my website independently. Intentionally not completed.
27. Sell something on eBay.
28. Do a video blog post.
29. Spend a week without internet, except email once a day.

NURSING

30. Become oncology certified.
31. Take the charge nurse class.
32. Take the preceptor class.
33. Get promoted.
34. Get ACLS certified.
35. Thoroughly research nurse practitioner programs in the area and decide whether or not to enroll.

CULTURE

36. Watch all of the movies that have won Best Picture. (43/83 – List)
37. Track down this classical piece by Mendelssohn that I used to own but lost, and only know the melody to.
38. Read 5 Pulitzer Prize winning books that I haven’t read. (3/5) - Olive Kitteridge, Middlesex, Gilead
39. Read 5 books of David’s recommendation. (3/5) - And the Sea Will Tell, Columbine, Losing Our Religion
40. Participate in a blog reading challenge and post reviews for every book read.
41. Attend a Messiah sing-a-long.
42. Take another class from Leisure Learning Unlimited.
43. Obtain or transcribe the clarinet sheet music for “Desperate For Love” by Over the Rhine.
44. See another live musical. - Wonderland (also saw many others!)

HOUSTON

45. Eat Sunday brunch at Birraporetti’s again.
46. Walk the Kemah boardwalk.
47. Go to another Dynamo game.
48. Go to a Texans game.
49. Drive through River Oaks at Christmas.
50. Go to Dickens on the Strand.
51. Visit SeaWorld and do the penguin encounter.
52. See the Beer Can House.
53. Visit the Orange Show monument.

TRAVEL

54. Go camping again.
55. Change passport to married name.
56. Go saltwater fishing with David.
57. Take David to Tabor’s homecoming.
58. Stay in a bed & breakfast.
59. Take David to visit my aunt and uncle in South Carolina.

HOME

60. Paint the entire front half of the house.
61. Set up a writing desk in the front room.
62. Sell/give away/donate all the books I don’t need or want.
63. Plant something.
64. Get the carpet replaced.
65. Have the locks changed so they all open with a single key.
66. Get all the electrical outlets working again.
67. Set up a fully-functional and decorated dining room.
68. Obtain a vacuum cleaner.
69. Refinish my old desk chair.
70. Get the drywall in the bathroom ceiling replaced if needed. - Turns out the drywall wasn’t affected by the leak in our attic! Hurrah, one less project to spend time and money on.
71. Buy 5 original/handmade art/craft pieces from local creators to display in our home. (0/5)

RELATIONSHIPS

72. Write David a list of 100 things I love about him.
73. Babysit my new nephew.
74. Get pregnant.
75. Send 10 ‘just because’ cards. (7/10) - Lauren P., Jennifer W., Lauren A., Stephany R., Tabaitha K., Erin S., Grandma
76. Hand write a letter to my Australian pen pal.
77. Host a game night.
78. Give David 5 random love cards. (1/5)
79. Send out timely Christmas cards.
80. Attend my 10-year high school reunion.

GIVE BACK

81. Donate blood once a quarter. (9/9)
82. Register to be a bone marrow donor.
83. Start using reusable shopping bags.
84. Send Mary, the child we sponsor in Uganda, a picture of us.
85. Make an achievable plan of steps to take to have a more environmentally friendly life.

BE CREATIVE

86. Finish a cross-stitch project. - See it in Meredith’s nursery.
87. Complete NaBloPoMo.
88. Make and send birthday cards to everyone on my birthday list for three months.
89. Make an inspiration board.
90. Have a custom stamp made.
91. Take a sewing class.

SPIRITUAL

92. Memorize Philippians 3.
93. Complete the Biblica New Testament challenge.
94. Fast for 24 hours and evaluate.
95. Be a regular at a women’s Bible study.
96. Complete a Beth Moore Bible study with homework (on my own with downloaded sessions or live). - The Beloved Disciple

ET CETERA

97. Buy another leash and walk the dogs simultaneously.
98. Get new windshield wipers for my truck.
99. Become a true fan of the Texans by following every game and discussing with David.
100. Complete a New York Times crossword puzzle without help.
101. Compile a list of favorite quotes.

Thanks to Walgreens for underwriting this post. I was paid as a member of the Clever Girls Collective, but the content is all mine. Visit http://www.discoverbeautywithin.com/.

***

I’m not super into makeup and beauty products, but I’m also not uncaring of my appearance and skin health either. Actually, over the past year I began the process of transitioning all my personal care products to natural versions, and I’m not talking high-end stuff. I’m on a budget, and I want to do this the healthy way AND the cheap way. I’ve tried a lot of things, and this is what I’ve come up with.

>Facial care: I’ve started using the natural oil cleansing method, mixing extra virgin olive oil and castor oil, then wiping off with a warm towel. I can get away without using any  moisturizer, but I find that if I do that the fine lines on my face are much more visible. Burt’s Bees Radiance Night Creme takes care of that (or, honestly, whatever lotion I have lying around – my skin isn’t sensitive).

>Body: Alba Botanica lotion is wonderful. Smells good, goes on clean, all natural, and lasts a really long time. Oh, and this isn’t all-natural, but I refuse to part with my anti-perspirant and am dedicated to Dove deodorant.

>Makeup: I haven’t yet tried a cheaper version of mineral foundation (my favorite kind), but I hear good things about L’Oreal True Match Naturale, so that’s what I’ll go with next. I’ve tried all-natural mascaras, but they just don’t work as well and mascara is really important to me. My current go-to version is Covergirl Lash Blast Mega Volume. With a couple of coats my lashes look awesome, and it applies so easily. And…that’s all the makeup I wear on a regular basis.

>Teeth: Tom’s of Maine toothpaste works well and tastes fresh.

>Hair: I tried the no shampoo thing, but I guess I didn’t try hard enough because my hair felt gross (even though I knew it was clean). So for awhile I’ve been using Nature’s Gate shampoo and conditioner every other day or so. I only need a little bit each time, so they last.

***

Really, that’s about it. I try to keep things as low-maintenance as possible and I find that I’m much happier.  What’s your beauty philosophy?