Kids, Parents, And Families

Teaching your kids to deal with school bullies

2010-09-12T18:45:00.003-05:00

by Jerry Curtis
See Original Article at Helium.com

To teach your child to deal with bullying, you first have to know it is going on. After that you'll need to determine how serious it is. Is it the so-called “social bullying” (taunting and teasing) or is it the more serious physical intimidation (extorting lunch money, etc.)? Next, the parent has to determine what level of parental or teacher intervention is needed and to respond appropriately. Appropriate response could be anything from just being a supporting "coach," to seeking help from school or law enforcement authorities.

THE BULLIED CHILD – A PROFILE
Children who are “different” in some way, or are timid and easily upset are prime targets for bullying. If your child fits that emotional profile, watch for other warning signs. Those signs include, among other things, loss of interest in school, falling grades, please of “sickness” when child should be getting ready for school, etc. If you child comes home with torn clothing, bruises or missing school gear, it could be a sign that some serious bullying is going on.

PARENT INTERVENTION
Experts advise that parents of a child being bullied should not overreact. It is a natural to feel outraged when parents learn that their child is being hurt in any way. The important thing is to find out what is happening and avoid emotional outbursts while the child is going through the difficulty and embarrassment of describing the bullying. Just listen, and don’t expect the child to disclose everything at once. It may be useful for parents to take a methodical approach and (time permitting) begin monitoring the instances of harassment to build a case. A record of times, dates, name of the bully or bullies, etc., will go a long way of making a good case against the bully and overcoming the bully's parents' natural tendency to be defensive and deny everything.

DECIDING AN APPROPRIATE COURSE OF ACTION
Depending on the age of the child and the severity of the bullying, parents can be coaches or actively intervene on the part of the child. Again, whatever the parents decide to do should always be accompanied by a calm, factual approach. Parents will experience more cooperation if they report what happened and work with school authorities, if the bullying is happening on school grounds. One great guide for parents can be found on the web on the Great Schools article “What parents can do about school bullying."

TEACHING THE BULLIED CHILD COPING SKILLS
Until the bully can be stopped and the behavior corrected, your child needs to learn how to handle and cope with the bully. Another great resource, and written in language your child can understand, is on the Kid’s Health web site. In the article “Dealing with bullies” the author provides several commonsense and safe ways to avoid being bullied. Coping skills include avoiding the bully where possible, being brave and “standing tall,” and hanging out with other children who will discourage the bully. The best advice for kids being bullied:

“If you are being bullied, it's very important to tell an adult. Find someone you trust and go and tell them what is happening to you. …. Sometimes bullies stop as soon as a teacher finds out because they're afraid that they will be punished by parents.”

Finally, parents should find out if the school has an active and organized anti-bullying program. If so, parents can partner with school authorities to stop the harassment and bullying. If not, parents can use the PTA or other forums to urge the school to set up “Bully-Free Zones” and to take advantage of professionals who know all about prevention of bullying. See the Committee for Children web site for one example.

Free From Bullies - CLICK HERE
There are too many kids being bullied in our schools today. It is time to do all we can to put a stop to it. Watch for changes in your child's behavior, dress, mood, etc. Check into the many available Stop Bullying programs that are available. Bullying can be devastating to a child of any age. It can even lead to suicide. Learn all you can so you can help stop this problem.

Keep Looking Up!
Diane Foster

Sarah's Story

2010-08-25T09:27:00.001-05:00

For Help Learning How To Stop Bullies - Click Here

Keep Looking Up!
Diane

Bullying Story - ABC News

2010-08-25T00:05:00.005-05:00

Stopping The Bullying Problem - Click Here

Words Hurt. Don't Be A Part Of it

2010-08-20T10:11:00.011-05:00

Bullying can have a damaging and lasting effect on kids. Don't be a part of it.
If you are a victim of bullying, seek adult intervention. Don't let it continue.

For families who are serious about helping their child out of a bullying situation, I recommend you look into all of the help that is available to you. Below you will find a great resource to help you learn how to deal with bullies.

Being bullied is becoming a very common problem for many kids. I don't know about you, but it makes me extremely angry when I think of what some kids are forced to put up with, day after day, because they, nor their parents, know how put a stop to it. Not only do the kids being bullied suffer from humiliation and self esteem, but they also often find that their grades and friendships begin to suffer as well.

In "Solving The Bullying Problem" you will learn:

• The research and facts you need to know • The serious effects on the victim and the perpetrator

• Steps you can use to take control • How to solve specific problems • How to develop self-esteem and resilience

Robyn Collins and Wendy Nichols are teachers with 39 years experience between them.

Free From Bullies - CLICK HERE

This is a program that you do not want to pass up if you or someone you know is a suffering from being the victim of bullying.

Keep Looking Up!
Diane

The 6 Sleep Stealers

2010-08-15T07:17:00.001-05:00

Top Reasons Why Your Baby Isn't Getting Enough Sleep

by Jill Spivack, LMSW and Jennifer Waldburger, LCSW

Note: This article is geared towards babies who are ready to be sleep trained (over four months).

There are six main “sleep stealers,” or reasons why your child isn’t sleeping well; she may be affected by one of them, by a combination of several, or – if you’ve hit the jackpot – by all six.

*NO CONSISTENT BEDTIME ROUTINE
*YOUR CHILD NEEDS YOU TO FALL ASLEEP
*POOR SLEEP ENVIRONMENT
*MISUSING SLEEP AIDS
*MISTIMED SLEEP SCHEDULE
*NIGHT NOSHING

#1: NO CONSISTENT BEDTIME ROUTINE
Though most parents know a bedtime routine is a good idea, it is hard to be consistent, either because there’s too much to do or because your child has so much energy that it’s hard to slow her down. Still, a predictable wind-down routine is one of the most important tools your child needs to sleep well. Tips:

*Physical activity should come before the routine.
*It should last 15 to 60 minutes at nighttime, and about 10 to 15 minutes before a nap.
*Do the routine in the same room where your child sleeps.
*Do approximately the same activities each time in the same order.

#2: YOUR CHILD NEEDS YOU TO FALL ASLEEP

It’s the most natural thing in the world to rock or feed your child to sleep, but doing this doesn’t help him stay asleep all night – many children who fall asleep this way awaken repeatedly. These disruptions are often caused at least partially by their dependence on certain conditions, or “sleep associations” – anything your child associates with falling asleep, including being held, rocking, sucking or falling asleep with a parent. Throughout the night, your child drifts into lighter sleep phases to check out her environment. During these “partial arousals,” she’s not fully conscious – and as long as nothing has changed significantly since she fell asleep, she returns to deeper sleep. But for many children, if something is different, this raises a red flag and she will need you to recreate the same conditions that were present when she fell asleep in the first place. Not all associations are bad; what’s important is that your child can recreate them on her own and put herself back to sleep.

#3: POOR SLEEP ENVIRONMENT

*Your child’s crib or bed should be all about sleep; whatever doesn’t contribute to sleep should go.
*On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being dark, your child’s room should be an 8 or 9.
*Protect your child from distracting sounds with white noise. You can use a fan, air purifier, or white noise machine.
*Dress children in something warm enough to protect them without a blanket.

#4: MISUSING SLEEP AIDS
Sleep aids include pacifiers, swaddling, music, and blankies. Although some sleep aids lead to sleep associations, not all are detrimental. What’s important is that you know when they are appropriate and when they interfere with sleep.

#5: MISTIMED SLEEP SCHEDULE
Allowing your child to stay up until he seems tired is one of the surest ways to guarantee a bumpy night of sleep. One reason is that your child will probably wake early, due to morning light; the other is that your child will likely become overtired. For children of every age, there are optimal “sleep windows” in which it is easiest to drift off into sleep. If your child goes too far past this window, his body becomes stressed and produces the hormone cortisol, which acts as a stimulant like caffeine, and can cause your child to act “wired” or appear to get a second wind. Most children do well with a bedtime between 7:00 and 8:00 P.M.; 8:30 is the latest bedtime we recommend up to age 10. Choosing a consistent bedtime doesn’t mean that your child won’t ever be able to stay up late for a special occasion or a family night out; but if he does stay up late one night, try to put him down on time the next. Most children need at least 11 hours of sleep to function well. And bedtime is the time when your child is in her crib or bed with the lights out.

#6: NIGHT NOSHING
To be successful in learning how to sleep, your child needs to have one clear, consistent response to his night wakings. If you sometimes feed him when he cries and sometimes do not, he’ll become confused and will cry longer and harder overall. You may be wondering how your baby will make it all the way through the night without feeding. You have every reason to be concerned about this if your child is used to eating at night, but by the time a baby is 5 months old and weighs 15 pounds, she should be able to sleep all night without a feed. If you have a toddler who is growing well, he is perfectly capable of taking in all of the necessary calories and hydration during the day.

Article written by: Jill Spivack, LMSW and Jennifer Waldburger, LCSW

How to handle an out of control child

2010-08-14T14:21:00.003-05:00

by Mz. Veracious

Do you have a child that is out of control? Do you feel overwhelmed and trapped by your child? If so this topic should shed a light on how to handle the situation. I love children as much as the next person but today parents are playing the victim too often. Step one is to REMIND your child who is the boss.
How do you expect your child to respect you if you dont assume your place as the adult in their lives? I dont expect parents to subliminally etch it into the child's brain but letting your child run you is the beginning of the end. Step two is to follow thru on punishments and restrictions to the end. You cannot command authority from your child if you limit the scope of your authority by not following thru on punishments/restrictions.

Step three is to reinforce good behavior more with verbal praises and not monetary ones. If your child appreciates their possessions more because they had to really work to earn it than your child will learn to appreciate the treats life has to offer with hard work. Step four is to MAINTAIN your authority while allowing your child general freedoms they have EARNED. Being too strict is the equivalent of restricting the quality of your child's life. If you are too strict your child can become repressed or overly risky. Being too lenient can result in your child not knowing their boundaries and living at the expense of others emotionally and physically. Step five... pull yourself together and stop whining about your plight. When your child sees you nearly despondent in the fetal position it compromises your integrity as an adult. If they can break you, you may as well put up your white flag and surrender. If your child hurts your feelings or shocks you to speechlessness... WALK AWAY AND CRY LATER IN THE COMFORT OF YOUR OWN SPACE.

Learn more about this author, Mz. Veracious

The Baby Sleep Solution

2010-07-27T13:52:00.005-05:00

If you are lucky enough to have a baby that goes down at night with no problem, no crying, no fussing, and sleeps for most of the night, then you should consider yourself a very fortunate parent. That is not how it is in many families.

If you do happen to have a baby who does not like to sleep at night, you should know that you are not alone and that there is a solution. This Audio Program by Chris Towland easily helps you understand how to solve these baby sleep problems correctly and quickly.

Anyone who has had children knows that to be an effective parent it is extremely important that you are getting a proper amount of sleep yourself. If your baby is keeping you up all night long for the first year or more, then you will be too tired during the day to enjoy your baby the way you should. The more energy you have, the more both you and your baby will benefit.

By downloading this audio program, you will gain the ability to learn how to help your baby sleep better at night while listening to the program on your iPod, computer or mp3 player while working, exercising, etc. You also have the option of listening to the program on a web page where you will simply press one button and listen to the entire program, no downloading necessary. Click Here!

Testimonials from satisfied parents:

"God bless you"

Dear Chris. Thank you very much. My wife and I have applied your instructions on our 16-month old son and we have seen a great improvement in his sleeping at night. Thank you very much. God bless you.

Murage Murgo

South Africa

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"Sleeping through the night for the last five weeks"

Thank you for your advice it makes sense and it DOES work, my little girl, who is 9 weeks old has been sleeping through the night for the last five weeks thanks to your practical advice. At seven o'clock in the evening after a short bath and a few minutes breastfeeding she sleeps through to six the next morning, thanks for your words of wisdom. thanks again!

Roseann Dunn and happy baby Caitlin x

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"Sleeps through the night"

I followed your guide and I'm extremely happy to say that my little boy now sleeps through the night. Many thanks for all the help.

Scott

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"worked when baby was overtired and not well"

I've already used one of your tips, which worked when baby was overtired and not well. So thank you!

Louise x

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Click Here!

Keep Looking Up!

Diane

Parenting Resources - Your Children Need You Now!

2010-07-26T11:53:00.002-05:00

Being a parent in today's world is certainly anything but easy! Have you ever looked around and noticed how many kids seem to be "out of control", or just plain angry? There are many places where the blame for this could be laid, but if you are a loving parent who simply does not know how to help your child control his/her emotions or anger, you NEED to take a look at the links in the top right sidebar. Likewise, if your child is suffering from being bullied, PLEASE, visit these links.

Dealing with an angry or disrespectful child so often causes parents to feel like they have failed, or that they are losing their child. There is such a desire to want to help your child when he or she is so obviously troubled by something, yet, too often parents, not knowing what else to do, will continue to keep trying the same methods of parenting that they have always used.

How long will it take before we all realize that if we keep doing the same things, we are going to keep getting the same results?

I URGE YOU: Please take a look at the list of links in the top right sidebar. You can also click on the page titled "Great Parenting Resources" These are great resources for finding new, more effecient ways, to help your child. Children grow up fast and the best time to work with them is while they are still young. Even a teenager will be able to respond positively if they see you are willing to help them in a loving and straight forward way. But don't wait much longer. They need you now!

Keep Looking Up!

Diane

Solving The Bullying Problem

2010-06-22T10:39:00.009-05:00

In "Solving The Bullying Problem" you will learn:

• The research and facts you need to know • The serious effects on the victim and the perpetrator

• Steps you can use to take control • How to solve specific problems • How to develop self-esteem and resilience

Solving The Bullying Problem - CLICK HERE
This is a program that you do not want to pass up if you or someone you know is a suffering from being the victim of bullying.

NO-NONSENSE PARENTING FOR TODAY'S TEENAGER

2010-06-08T21:58:00.004-05:00

Attention: Parents with a Disrespectful Teenager

How To Get Your Disrespectful Teenager To LISTEN To What

You Say, DO What You Want Them To Do and RESPECT You As Their Parent, While Getting Peace Back In Your Home!

From: Norbert Georget
Click Here!

If you are interested in getting your teenager to STOP their abusive or disrespectful behavior,.... then this is going to be the most exciting message you ever read and extremely valuable to you as a parent.

The Anxiety-Free Child Program

2010-06-08T21:34:00.003-05:00

"If your child struggles with anxiety, fear, or excessive worry, helping them overcome those challenges NOW can change their entire lives for the better. The Anxiety-Free Child Program is the most complete and effective resource I've seen, I highly recommend it."

Dr. Angela Butkevic, PsyD

Click Here!

From Rich Presta
Author of The Anxiety-Free Child Program

My Out-Of-Control Child

2010-05-15T20:36:00.024-05:00

Is your child out of control? Defiant? Oppositional? So many times parents feel at their wits end because they can not find a way to stop their child from being so out of control. Does that sound familiar? Are you among the many parents who throw up their hands in frustration and believe you have tried everything, but for your child nothing works? If this describes your situation, there is a solution available that will help you learn new "cut to the chase" parenting strategies that work immediately rather than waiting to see the results months or years from now.

OPS is an online program which includes an ebook called My Out-Of-Control Child. The original book was written by Mark Hutten, M.A., of the Madison County Youth Center.

This book covers:

What to do when your child:

Applies guilt trips / Applies insults / Argues with adults / Believes the rules don't apply to him/her

Blames others for his/her behavior / Blames others for his/her problems / Calls you "bad" names

Deliberately annoys people / Destroys property in the house / Does not feel responsible for his/her actions / Does not take “no” for an answer / Feels entitled to privileges / Gets bad conduct reports from teachers / Has a learning disability / Has frequent anger outbursts / Has problems with authority figures / Has problems with siblings / Is a bully at school or home / Is depressed

Is making bad grades / Is manipulative and deceitful / Is physically aggressive / Is resentful and vindictive / Is touchy and easily annoyed by others / Is verbally abusive / Is disrespectful

Lacks motivation / Leaves the house without permission / Lies / Refuse to do chores

Refuses to follow rules / Skips school / Steals / Suffers with ADHD in addition to ODD

Suffers with Conduct Disorder / Suffers with Reactive Attachment Disorder in addition to ODD

Teases others relentlessly / Uses profanity / ...and much more!

To find out how to purchase the ebook My Out-Of-Control-Child, please click on the title of this article. It will take you to a link that has all of the information you need to know about this program.

You can also click the My Out-Of-Control Child link at the top of the sidebar.

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