Bamf here rematerializing from the void..

It was quick, had some uncomfortable moments, and was deliciously funny; and no I am not talking about the first time I had sex.  The Apatow crew bookends the summer with another hit that made more in the first weekend then the total cost of the film.  Superbad brings the superfunk—and took me back to high school in more than one way.

There are many praises to be sung about the film from performances, to writing.  Superbad is a film that hits the ball out of the park, without the aid of steroids or star power (but methinks it is apparent that the Apatow crew is going to be around for some time to come).  SB is made to have legs, from the title to the music; the story has a certain timeless air to it that will have it finding new fans over the years to come.  I would put it on the same lines of Animal House—which did not use the pop music of the day and focused on the nuances of what one would like to think college would be like.  The Goonies would be another example of what I am talking about, pop references aside, it is the sort of adventure any kid would want to be apart of.  Superbad invokes in me the experiences I had all throughout my time in high school; they just didn’t happen all in one night.  But the pining for a girl, the need to find alcohol, the chance to look great among the ones who otherwise dismissed my presence—it’s the experience any high school student would want to have, or the sentimental would like to reflect upon. 

I love the choice of music in this.  Instead of going for the hot track of the day, you get a 70’s infusion that makes the time it exists in abstract in presentation.  Save the mention of internet porn, the story stays pretty neutral.  Since this is a “night in the life of” type story, I couldn’t help but to become gitty at the nice call back to another sort of tale, Linklater’s Dazed and Confused.  When Seth and Evan arrive at the house party to procure some provisions, the entrance is staged nearly identically to when Mike and Tony arrive at the moon tower party.  Just no Nicky Katt.

There is so much fun to be had in watching these guys go through their night.  It’s like watching License to Drive meets American Pie, but with far more honest dialogue.  This really is a film for guys; the jokes about sex are crass and real.  Men may never admit they talk like that, but they do…sometimes .  I always harp on the point that the circumstances in which you see a film will sway your opinion of it.  The night I saw Superbad, a long time friend, well actually, my first girlfriend ever, had been visiting me for a couple days.  We have stayed in contact over the years even after a sad breakup and parting of the ways.  Now though, ten years later, we found ourselves in each other’s company.  It was a surreal experience sitting next to her watching events we had in some way or another experienced together years before.  And for a moment, I was 17 again on our second date.  I say this all because full disclosure is a must, I loved this film, but I also loved who I was able to see it with in a time when I haven’t actually been to a movie with another person in quite a while.  So instead of recanting my favorite moments, and glowing on about cameos and one liners, I’ll wrap this one up.  The best writing comes from personal experience, and this story is certainly full of it and in turn made it as great as having sex in the morning. 

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Bamf here rematerializing from the void..

After the collapse of a bridge in Minnesota, America has been put on high alert when it comes to its infrastructure.  Audits of this countries bridges and dams have become talking points for their deficiency.  But this will all come to past as our collective memory and attention falls short, and another news cycle is on the horizon.  That is an admittedly cynical view of us (or the U.S.), and that is an omni present theme apparent in The Bourne Ultimatum.  Where United 93 was an exploration of the question “what do we do now?"—Greengrass answers with “this is how we could F it all up."

Paul Greengrass continues his documentarian style in his completion of the Bourne saga with hand held cameras in spades.  It feels like the shaky cam was a bit overused at times, and could be a distraction from the performances, specifically towards Bourne’s answer scenes that would bring him closer to his final ultimatum.  I am on the fence on this one.  Before screening this, I began a discussion with a co-worker about what I was to see later that night.  Not once did the discussion turn to Matt Damon, Julia Stiles or Joan Allen.  I gushed on about Greengrass and his visceral style.  I even commented on how I dread the moment Greengrass does a torture scene—and my fears were paid in TBU; he makes the spine twist in agony.  But the director’s style will pull you out of the experience in moments when it shouldn’t, and once the vale is lifted, you have to take a second to retask and bring yourself back into the moment.  Greengrass married the shaky with the calm compassionately in United 93—in TBU, not so much.

Now when it comes to the dealing with action in the chase, there is a bounty of brilliance to be found.  Bourne’s first escort mission will give any gamer goosbumps of delight.  The direction of the narrative in frames makes a large open area full of denizens seem as claustrophobic as a Moroccan apartment.  There is not much flash when it comes to Bourne’s fighting scenes, more utilitarian then anything else.  The set up at the start showing the hero limping about gives a sense of exposure for the rest of the film, so that every fight weighs that much heavier in your mind.  You just do not want to see Bourne fail.  But what is his final ultimatum?

As the last film in the trilogy, it is surprising at how aggressive the marketing for this film was.  It would seem that the audience is already built in for the story.  And as it has performed well, certainly showing momentum in opening box office receipts during the previous two, I wonder how many were put off from seeing this the first weekend from the sheer ad nauseum.  My best guess is such a campaign is to attract the 13 year olds who were only 8 when the first film came about considering the rating given to it.  And there is a certain amount of catch-up played out during the story, as Jason B is asked far too many times if he really, no really, doesn’t remember anything.

This film is certainly as cynical as the times it was made in.  Consider how Rambo was a huge success because of its poignant timing.  A nation beaten by the Vietnam War and still licking its wounds, and now facing an enemy in the cold war where no public shots were being fired.  The American consciousness was not so accepting of the standard wartime film.  But enter Rambo, a one man army who would fight against all the injustice brought on to vets of his day.  Bourne is not so different, used by the government to do private work under the guise of keeping the country safe.  And as the corruption exposed goes higher up, his vendetta is not for blood, but exposure.  The viewer may not be so dubious to except that this sort of business is going on when places like Guantanomo Bay exist. 

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The cinescape has been devoid of good Science Fiction tales of late.  While the idea of gigantic robots raining down from outer space to fight a war on earth does have a sci-fi edge to it—Transformers is not a proper representation of what I mean.  Science Fiction is the exploration of a scientific idea and the possibilities it can yield in a literary, or for this purpose, cinematic form.  Films such as The Forbidden Planet, Pitch Black as well as one I have a particular affection to, 2001: A Space Odyssey.  The aforementioned are all stories existing in the sandbox of imagination.  Sunshine written by Alex Garland and directed by Danny Boyle is a high concept, sci-fi idea that puts to task the human conceptions of atheism and the greater good, staged in space where Earth faces extinction when the sun’s light fades out.  Sunshine asks—what would happen if?

The space vehicle Icarus II is sent with a crew of eight with the intention to create a new star because of the sun failing.  Set fifty years into the future, when the first mission Icarus I was unable to fulfill its task for unknown reasons, Earth puts all of its resources into the Icarus II, a long pencil like fuselage that connects to the dark matter bomb hidden in the shadow of an immense solar shield. When they approach the planet Mercury for a slingshot pass to their payload delivery point—a distress signal is picked up through solar noise and now the original Icarus is found.  The crew is faced with a choice; attempt to find if any survivors are still on the previously thought lost ship, or defer the heroics in order to continue with the mission?  Ultimately, it does not come down to a vote, rather, a decision based on logic that dictates if their bomb is not successful, the Icarus I can be used as a back up.  This choice falls on the solar bomb physicist Capa (Cillian Murphy), who likens the decision on deciding if a coin will land on heads or tails.  Captain Kaneda (Hiroyuki Sanada) makes it clear that he does not want a fence sitting scientist, choose a side.  Capa falls with “two chances are better then one” and this definitive decision leads the crew towards disaster.

Sunrise is cast for personalities.  Not one actor is given more screen time then another, but Capa certainly becomes the narrative lead as he is the only man who knows how to work the bomb.  Chris Evans (Fantastic Four) plays second in command to Kaneda as Mace, a well versed scientist who understands how every life is expendable on Icarus II if it is to preserve the mission’s outcome—saving billions of lives on the Earth.  Evans brings a charisma to the role along with trenchant criticism to his colleagues that makes him seemingly an asshole, but right at the same time.  The ship’s psychologist Searle played by Cliff Curtis (last seen in The Fountain) gives a standout performance as a man torn between maintaining his crew’s sanity, and going slightly crazy at the same time.  Searle is obsessed with the observation deck of the Icarus II that resides in the center of the heat shield. The film starts with him sitting and looking at the sun watching the fire and gas churn about in the fusion.  He asks the computer, a sexy sounding H.A.L. to decrease the filter on the platform so he can see more light.  The voice of Icarus states if he goes beyond the allotted parameters, he will not survive.  Searle then takes this to task by bringing the filter within decimal places of the critical point, and an explosion of light engulfs his every sense.  Searle has an obsession with this deck, and through the course of the story his face becomes more tattered and burnt by his need to be drenched in sunlight and he chases after the high like it’s a plunger full of heroine.

The film plays in light and shadow.  There are times when the camera gives the impression of an eye that has stared into sunlight for too long.  The sun is a character in itself as its effects on the crew, be it the pressure of the mission’s success or the dependence of the crew on it’s light.  As they draw closer to the finality of the voyage, hard choices must be made on what is one’s logic rather than heart.  As I do not want to spoil more beyond this point, I will tread lightly, and be a bit enigmatic. I certainly suggest this for any Science Fiction fan, so I will pose the question like this.  Imagine you believe in God.  Your God’s celestial kingdom that you have been renting out through faith has decided to take away your planet’s life.  Now by chance of fate, or some other cosmic means, you stand at the precipice of the sun’s death, a place where you most certainly can become the last living man in the universe, since the Earth will die long before your resources will run out.  Forgoing the opportunity to usurp your God by denying life back on Earth, its reprieve from the gallows, you now have become alone, alone with God as the last living person who can praise its glory.  Would you want that?  Who would you be, savior, or the hangman?  The atheist may well choose life, but history shows that some religions may embrace death.

Sunshine has a mind bending score composed by the band Underworld, who had work previously with Boyle on Trainspotting.  Underworld was given the film finished, and was put to improvise an electronica/classic core obviously drawing inspiration from Kubrick’s 2001 and in turn achieving something wonderful.  No expense seemed spared when it came to the full realization of the voyage towards the sun.  The crew really lives in the sets created; close quartered and utilitarian, no space feels wasted.  Visuals created outside the ship look like a mix between practical models and CGI, pushing the budget I am sure to its extremes and never cheating the viewer of spectacle. 

Sunshine succeeds on nearly every level.  The second act’s transition to third lacks a little in originality and could be compared in ways to Event Horizon but this is forgiven.  After all, the ends…they justify the means do they not?

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Bamf here rematerializing from the void..

A dramatic retelling of the story springs off of director Werner Herzog’s documentary, Little Dieter Needs to Fly (1997).  Written and directed by Herzog,

this is not a Bat-21 or Behind Enemy Lines type tale, nor is it a commentary of Americas involvement in Vietnam mashed with Jimi Hendrix’s “All along the Watchtower” that we have seen and have heard a hundred times over.  The Vietnam War has really been done past its saturation point in film, but a vet of that time in history may argue differently. 

This is a film not just about survival of the body, but survival of the mind.  When Dieter is brought to his prison with bamboo walls he meets his fellow captees and it is obvious they have been there for some time.  They thirst for news of the outside world like it was bread on the table for their empty stomachs.  Gene (Jeremie Davies) and Duane (Steve Zahn) introduce Dieter to his jailers and teach him what he needs to understand in order to live.  These are two actors who have committed themselves with no reservation to their roles.  Davies looks no more then 115lbs, he plays his character with a Jim Morrison cadence that shows the only reason he has lived as long as he has is the false notion that release is eminent. 

Steve Zahn has produced the performance of his career in Rescue Dawn.  A best supporting actor nod is most certainly in his future for the portrayal of a man broken—only held from falling to pieces by his friends in captivity.  He wears sullen eyes filled with an empty 1000 mile stare, his motions are like that of a dog beaten by his master for inhaling the same air he breathes.  He is a trapped mouse in a room full of starving cats.  Zahn is stunning in this film.  What an amazing talent he has cultured.

The film on a whole didn’t really get to me until about 30 minutes into the screening.  It starts with footage of aerial bombings over the jungle with Klaus Badelt’s (Pirates: Curse of the Black Pearl, Constantine) melancholy score bringing a rich sadness to the real life events depicted.  Later, as hunger and desperation take hold of the prisoners, his music weaves in and the movements change to underline the dastardly situation that will put you on edge like a mosquito buzzing in your ear at night. 

Bale is good in this, but for me overshadowed by Zahn.  Dieter has a naïve sense of his situation, he thinks because they are not at war; no threat really can enslave him.  Im reminded of an old Gary Larson Far Side where there’s a man shoveling coal in Hell whistling or making a casual comment to his fellow damned.  The devil looks to a demon and says something to the effect of “I don’t think we’re getting to that guy,” that’s Dieter.  He is given a chance to sign a paper that will give him freedom by denouncing the actions of the “Imperialist Americans”, a paper his integrity will not allow him to sign.  His response to the liaison,

"I love America, she gave me my wings. I will not sign that.” (Paraphrased)

Dieter maintains the crews spirits by giving levity to their situation, and a chance to escape.  This notion is scoffed at when they first hear of it, because their captors have all the advantages they need to keep them down.  The walls are not the prison, it’s the jungle.  Herzog with cinematographer Peter Zeitlinger create a claustrophobic atmosphere using the jungle as bars.  No place seems free, always stifling, hot, and treacherous.

The thing that I have trouble with when it comes to these films about real life struggle dramatized is the fact that since you are seeing it, you know everything ends up OK.  Like watching Will Smith play Chris Gardner is The Pursuit of Happyness, sure he’s with his kid in a subway stall, but I find it hard to invest in the story when I can slip out of the moment and say to my self, “meh, he’ll make it”.  Herzog got me in this one; the performances had a great deal to with this as well as the set up for the journey at the beginning.  The pilots before going on their mission are viewing a Navy reel on what to do if they find themselves in traction.  A hard faced recruit with a five o’clock shadow is shown going through the motions of concealment, water collection and the sharpening of his blade.  He has this face of unbeatable pride, as if he was to walk up on a platoon of Vietcong, he’d slit all their throats with one hand while lighting a Marlboro Red with the other.  In contrast, the faces of the real prisoners show nothing of the sort—even after a small victory in concealing food or vesting a guard in combat.  They are tired, wretched, and devoid of emotion.  They express humility, beaten souls that do not know if a God would exist in the world they find themselves in.  Herzog shows men brought to their knees and asks the question—what do we know of freedom?

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Bamf here rematerializing from the void..

UPDATE AT BOTTOM!

Transformers is that perfect summer film.  It is every 12 year olds wet dream filled with spectacle, hot girls and huge ass robots beating the crap err oil out of one another.  The writers flip some conventions and Bay holds true to his, as the pace never lets up save for exposition that sounds far better out of a cartoon head.  I had this little rowl with my friend when I told him to take his intellectual hat off for a moment, he responded with this.

Well perhaps he’s right, but from the first moment the dialogue began I decided to throw the hat into the fire, sit back and enjoy. Though it does creep up here and there, I’m going to leave that hat alone; after all, it’s the privilege of a college drop out.  That in itself is a intellectual decision, but lets not cross eyes.

I was looking up movies to take in through the week; I’m a bit behind due to standing as Best Man for my Best Mate’s wedding in Alaska.  Rescue Dawn is a film I’ll be reviewing soon and it’s on a limited release in L.A. and N.Y. I stumbled upon the Arclight homepage looking for showtimes and on the splash page they had listings for Transformers debut.  About 7 showings—all nearly sold out save for one seat at the 8:11pm screening.  For those not knowing, the Arclight is located in Hollywood CA off Sunset and Vine. It is the single greatest theater I have ever been to.  I entered from the parking garage in through the back door.  You buy your assigned seat, so no needing to get in the queue for the choice spot, and there is not one bad seat in the house even if you are up front. Seats are well padded, a bit like first class in an airplane without the leather and the ability to recline.  No ads play before the film, only trailers, and the music that fills the hall comes straight from the great scores of the years.  If you show up after the film starts, no admittance.  The usher just prior to starting the show comes out and gives a quick speech about turning off anything that makes noise. They will check the picture and sound levels habitually to ensure quality of presentation, and above all else, shut the F up once the show starts.  It’s a film lover’s utopia.  I love the Arclight.

Transformers is the Michael Bay film.  All those years of jingoistic hymns and swooping camera pans learned fit effortlessly in the story.  In the 80s I recall these marketing post cards that had a business printed on a thin sheet of what appeared to be dehydrated cardboard.  When you ran said board under a faucet the piece would spring to life and become a sponge 10 times its original size.  This is a fitting analogy for Transformers, an otherwise niche 80s property that required a gushing of Bay to engorge the experience and bring it to life. 

I’m known to annoy those around me by changing songs frequently before they are finished—there are certain songs that just wear out their welcome and my deficiency in attention gets the better of me most times.  The movie trucks along at break neck speed never giving the audience a moment to take in any of the moments of disbelief and Bay’s need to have hypertime to move the story along.  It turns from one adrenalin rush to the next only slowed down by the exposition of Optimus Prime from time to time which in itself is forgiven because it is Peter Cullen himself giving delivery.  Really this would never have worked without Peter Cullen, his voice is Transformers, and even the uninitiated will be wondering just who that earthy rasp of a voice was.  When dealing with big F’ing robots, every scene is a set piece, and although the “hypertime” as I call it that Bay plays with to keep the pace blistering is forgivable, you have to wonder how it stays night so damn long.  Oh ya, FX is easier to pull off at night.. (Damn there’s that hat again)

Sure they cheat a little, and at times the action might just move too fast for the brain to take in proper, but it all works great, and looks amazing.  ILM really stepped up for this film and their mix of practical props and CGI is seamlessly produced.  What awe in its challenge and Bay was right to twist the designs of the bots for a more dynamic take on the vehicles.  While Spiderman 3 had some great work in it, Transformers may have just outdone it by a hair, but it might not be fair to compare the two, is it? 

They twisted some typical conventions you are trained to know. They make the Blonde girl the smart one, the brunette the A-typical hottie.  Cameos are abundant with Bernie Mac stealing his scene, as well as Rick Gomez and John Tuturro (not so much a cameo) giving proper comic relief.  The guy who phoned it all in has to be Jon Voight who comes out playing the same beat over and over again, never flexing an acting muscle the whole time.  If only they could have resurrected Peter Sellers for that role, he would have been brilliant and the film better for it.  CG?

Rip offs, or homage’s (when I told a coworker that Heroes ripped off Watchmen, he said no, that’s called homage. It’s great getting corrected by someone who has not read nor watched either), however you want to put it are a plenty.  So let us just call it a tip of the cap to things like: the score from American Beauty, C-3PO on Chewies back, flare usage from The Rock, Kill Bill, as well as a sweet nod to doing a Rocket launcher jump in a Quake death match.  A host of others, but I forgot my pen before going into the theater.

Transformers is a must see in-theater experience.  When you get it home after spending thousands of dollars on your hi-def home theater, it will replace the pod race sequence from The Phantom Menace.  Naysayers be damned, Ang Lee would never be right for this, Bay was the right man for the job and his eye for the grandeur of it all.  The one thing I missed was a human Transformers suit like the one in the original movie.  When the cube is miniaturized I almost was certain that Shia LeBeouf was going to get to use it for his own third act surprise needs.  They must be saving that moment for the sequel.  Leave the adult at home and come to see Transformers with the eyes of a prepubescent youngster and prepare for one hell of a ride.

*Supplemental* I exited through the main doors and the scene was circus like.  Multiple media wagons, cameras everywhere, and lining the theater were the actual Autobots as cars.  So damn cool, was not expecting to see that.  I pulled out my camera to start doing some shots when...the battery was dead.  I was able to get a few shots from the hip, but was unable to get the setting right for nighttime photography, so they look a bit janky.  Ill be back there on the 4th to get some day time shots.  I had my camera because after that I was going to the Kwik-E-Mart in Burbank, but with dead bats, I had to put it off.  Ill post once Im charged back up.  I saw Optimus in his flamer glory!

UPDATE

I was back at the Arclight for a screening of Rescue Dawn (review should be up in a few days) and was able to get some much better shots then I had opening night. Enjoy!

Cool, yet no heat sensitive decals to be found...BAAAAYYYYYYYYY!!!

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Like a lot of people today I went out to my local Gamestop and picked up my copy of Transformers: The Game. When I reserved my copy over a week ago I was given the choice of getting the normal version that would be released in most retail stores, or the special “Cybertron Edition” which boasts extras such as interviews with the actors from the upcoming movie, behind-the-scenes look at the making of the game, and even a special level on the Transformers’ home world of Cybertron.

I’ve had the game for a total of 7 hours. I’ve played it for a total of 3 hours. And I’ve already beaten the game.

Yes that’s right. I’ve already beaten the game. On Autobot mode that is.

Transformers: The Game, although highly enjoyable, is a short experience that leaves you wanting more when there isn’t anymore to give. I haven’t beaten the game on Decepticon mode yet, but I’m going to assume it’s just as long as the Autobots mode so collectively you’re looking at a game that is just about 6 hours in length.

The story for the game loosely follows that of the movie. The planet of Cybertron is home to a race of alien beings called Transformers. The Transformers are split between two factions; The heroic Autobots led by Optimus Prime, and the evil Decepticons led by Megatron. After a World War on their home planet, the Transformers’ life source called “the All Spark Cube” it sent to Earth in an attempt to prevent it from falling into the wrong hands. Each faction follows the All Spark to Earth hoping to recover it for their own purposes. On Earth, a teenager named Sam Witwicky unknowingly holds the key to finding the All Spark. A chance encounter brings Sam into a meeting with the Autobots who tell him of the problems on their home planet. Shortly thereafter, the Decepticons arrive on Earth looking to gain the All Spark for their own purposes.

The game is pretty cut and dry. You choose which side you’re on and the story adjusts accordingly. Naturally, wanting to see how the movie unfolds (I’m like that) I sided with the Autobots first. You start the game off as Bumblebee, and are sent on a series of missions by Optimus Prime. Bumblebee plays a key part in the story initially due in part to the fact that the rest of the Autobots have not yet landed on Earth. Some of your missions include rid the city of the Decepticon drones (the countless minions you’ll destroy), protect Sam Witwicky, and clear a landing area for the rest of your allies to arrive.

Once the remaining Autobots arrive the game has you switch off between Bumblebee, Jazz, Ironhide, and Optimus Prime. I can’t quite understand why they chose to exclude Ratchet from gameplay, but they did.

Jazz is the next character you’ll assume control of in what I think is one of the coolest missions in the game. Since Jazz is the fastest of the Autobots, he is given the directive of luring the police away from the Autobots crash site, thus allowing them time to escape and regroup. The mission is a lot of fun because basically all you’re doing is driving at top speed trying to get the cops to follow you. Every now and again you’ll stop and be forced to cause a major distraction which usually consists of blowing up a gas station.

Throughout the game you’ll engage in missions that are specific to whichever Transformer you’re in control of. Bumblebee’s missions are usually some kind of rescue mission involving Same. Jazz’s missions usually consist of some kind of chase, or distraction. Ironhide’s (who is MASSIVE) missions consist of brawling with the Decepticons and blowing things up. And last, but certainly not least Optimus Prime’s missions revolve around the Autobot leader dealing out a serious ass beating to a Decepticon boss (Soundwave and Megatron).

I’ve read the reviews on the game with the “pros” (I’ve never understood the concept of a professional video game player) saying things like they expected more in terms of combat, storyline, etc. While the game does suffer from it’s problems, namely the extremely short length and choppy storyline, I am confused at how critics can complain about the combat. You’re playing as a group of 30 ft robots, and the last time I checked the Transformers weren’t known for their finess and martial arts skills. When engaged in combat all you’ll be doing is basically mashing the same button over and over until your opponent has been destroyed. Is it tedious? Yes it is, but again...these are giant robots, slugging it out is what they do. I will admit that the boss battles are lacking. You can pretty much use the same technique to defeat any boss you encounter throughout the game. The developers try to mix it up by adding some combat with some vehicle chase action, but they could’ve tried to make each boss at least a little different.

Without a doubt the game’s strongest point comes in the form of it’s graphics. The in game models look absolutely amazing, and the new designs of the Transformers lend themselves nicely to the gaming world. At a few points during the game it’s a bit hard to tell some of the Decepticons apart, but for the most part they all look great in their fully rendered big screen versions. The transformations (which you can do at any time) are a sight to see as you can really see how each part of the characters converts into either it’s vehicle mode or it’s Transformer mode.

Another strong point comes in the form of the scale, and interactions with the environments. The Transformers are massive in size (with the Decepticons dwarfing most of the Autobots), and when they engage in combat in the middle of a city; things get destroyed. On top of the hand-to-hand combat, each Transformer is given both a light and heavy projectile attack. If that’s not good enough for you, when playing as either an Autobot or Decepticon you can use almost anything around you as a weapon. Lightpole? yep. Civilian automobile? you’ve got it. Hell, you can even uproot a tree and swing it like a club at your enemy.

Personally, my favorite part of the game was hearing voice over veterans Peter Cullen and Frank Welker return to voice Optimus Prime and Megatron. Both actors voice their respective characters with as much enthusiasm and energy as they did when they first stepped into the roles back in the 80’s. The remaining Transformers are all voiced well, however it did take some time to adjust to the new voice for Starscream since his was one of the more distinct in the show. Actors Shia LeBouf and Megan Fox also lend their voices to the game, and although they have very little dialogue, each of them does well with that they’re given.

Overall, Transformers: The Game is a short, but enjoyable experience. Those who are looking for an extremely in-depth, thought provoking game with a variety of combat would be best to look elsewhere. However, fans of the Transformers, or those of you who are looking for a game where you can assume the control of massive robots and dish out some serious damage to both your opponents and the environments around you, then this is for you. I’ve been asked which Transformer game is better, this one, or the one that came out on the PS2 a few years ago. I’ll break it down for you like this. The PS2 version is A LOT more in depth, it’s longer, it has more characters, and the boss battles are far superior. Having said that, this version obviously looks MUCH better, the scale is perfect, the interaction with the environments is terrific, and the action overall is much better.

So in closing....

The Good: The in-game models look amazing. The transformations are incredible to watch. Voice acting from Peter Cullen and Frank Welker is as good as it’s ever been. Interactions with environments and surroundings are as realistic as they come. Tons of unlockables including movie stills, trailers, interviews and Generation 1 skins for the characters. Plus, you get to control giant robots that transform into vehicles with the press of a button....’nuff said.

The Bad: Extremely short gameplay length. Repetitive boss battles. Cut scenes aren’t edited very good, and the story seems a bit choppy. Added Cybertron level is boring with no real purpose to the game.

Trying to avoid the massive lines that were sure to pack movie theaters on Friday, I decided to take in a late showing of Fantastic 4: Rise of The Silver Surfer last night. My plan was foiled when at 10pm I was greeted with a line of over 200 people. Instead of getting annoyed, I instead took this as a sign of good things....maybe these people heard the movie was good, or maybe they’ve already seen it and liked it so much they had to come back for a second helping.

Needless to say, I went into the theater with high hopes.

One-and-a-half hours (not counting previews) later I walked out of the theater, those high hopes now replaced with a feeling of utter disappointment.

Fantastic 4: Rise of The Silver Surfer isn’t a bad movie, it just doesn’t make any sense. Even when you try to suspend all disbelief (which you are commonly asked to do in these types of movies) it feels as if the makers of this film are asking too much of you. In the team’s first encounter with the Surfer, which interrupts Reed and Sue’s wedding in New York, Reed orders Johnny to give chase. During the chase the Surfer and Torch pass right by the Washington Monument. Now, I’ve been out of school for awhile, but from what I can remember isn’t the Washington Monument in Washinton D.C? That means they would’ve had to have traveled approx 200 miles in a matter of seconds. Now I can see the Surfer doing this, but I wasn’t aware the Torch could fly that fast.

This is just one example of how the film fails to explain certain events. In another critical scene we are taken to Doom’s castle in Latveria, where we see Doom, still entombed in the case that he was shipped over in. The case begins to shake, and Doom awakens. That’s it. No explanation of how he managed to shake off the fact that his metallic body was super cooled at the end of the first one. He just wakes up.

Now don’t get me wrong, the movie isn’t without it’s strong points. Personally, I think Michael Chiklis is easily the best part of these movies. His performance as Ben Grimm a.k.a The Thing is among the best in comic genre films. People often say things like Patrick Stewart was born to play Professor X, or Christopher Reeve was born to play Superman, and they’re exactly right. However Chiklis should be added to that list as the actor that was born to play The Thing. His performance in the first film, and in the sequel are what made them enjoyable for me. Chris Evans puts on another solid performance as Johnny Storm a.k.a The Human Torch, and despite being a bit annoying thru most of the film, we do get to see a different side of Johnny, both emotionally and power wise. Jessica Alba plays it fairly safe as Sue Storm a.k.a The Invisible Woman, although she is a lot more confident in both who she is as a woman, and as a super hero in this movie. Men will be pleased to know that Alba has NEVER looked better than she does in this movie. I lost count at how many times I tapped my friend on the arm and said "damn, look at her!" Ioan Gruffudd plays Reed Richards a.k.a Mr. Fantastic almost exactly as he did in the first film. Gruffudd isn’t bad as Mr. Fantastic, but he also doesn’t really strike me as the perfect actor for the part either. For those wondering, yes Julian McMahon DOES return to play Dr. Doom. Now I like McMahon. I think he’s brilliant as Dr. Christian Troy on nip/tuck, however Dr. Doom he is not. It’s not that he plays the part wrong, it’s just that he was cast wrong. Doom is from Latveria, and in all previous incarnations he’s had a somewhat Count Dracula accent, accept for in the films....that bothers me. Doom does sport some new, cool armor, but overall he’s pretty forgettable.

The rest of the cast does a decent job, and Stan “The Man” Lee’s cameo will actually make you laugh out loud.

Ok, now on to the part everyone wants to know about. How is the Silver Surfer in the movie? Does he look good? How does he sound? Does he look cheesy at all? Well, let me put your questions to rest by saying this. Aside from The Thing, and Alba’s good looks, the Silver Surfer REALLY helped me stick around for this movie. About halfway thru I found myself getting incredibly bored. It wasn’t until we actually got to interact with the Surfer that my interest slowly began to build back up. Looks wise, they’ve nailed him. I mean it’s pretty hard to mess up a silver guy that’s essentially nude and rides on a silver surfboard right? His look was spot on, and the people at the WETA FX shop should be commended for the amount of detail they put into creating him. When the Surfer is separated from his board (sorry to ruin it) his skin turns into an almost tarnished metal look that left me wondering if he was still a CGI model, or a practical effect. Either way it was nicely done. His movements are that of a surfer in the way he twists and turns his body to maneuver his board. Again, the attention to detail is amazing.

So now that you know how he looks and acts, the big question is....how does he sound? It’s no secret that when it came to casting the voice of the Surfer director Tim Story called upon Laurence Fishburne. Initially I was excited because Fishburne has one of those voices that can be suited for anything, or anyone. Except for the Silver Surfer. Again, this isn’t the case of the actor being at fault. Fishburne basically uses his normal voice just at a lower register. It’s just that his voice does not fit the Surfer at all. When I used to read Silver Surfer comics as a kid I always imagined his voice to be very soft (like Fishburne), however not as deep, and with a bit of an “alien tone” to it. Much like how I want to look at my heroes and say “now THAT’S Superman!” I want to be able to hear them and say “that’s exactly how I imagined it.” This was just not one of those times as it was clearly Laurence Fishburne. Oh well, he doesn’t have that many lines in the movie so it’s ok.

Overall, Fantastic 4: Rise of The Silver Surfer is a step-up from it’s predecessor mainly due to the fact that it introduces a popular Marvel character to the big screen. However as a movie, it’s really kind of boring, and there are some MAJOR plot holes to deal with. The FX are good for the most part (except when Reed is dancing...it looks REALLY bad), it has humor in all the right spots, and the acting is decent. If I were comparing it to another comic related film I’d have to say it stacks up nicely next to Daredevil in that it had it’s moments, but I don’t think I’ll be in any rush to see it again.

Parents will like this movie because it’s a movie made for the whole family. Kids will love it because of all the cool super powers on screen, however hardcore geeks will be sorely disappointed.

Oh, and if you were wondering about Galactus being a cloud. Yes he is, but I think I understand what they were going for. Why show him now with an imminent Silver Surfer movie on the horizon? Plus they tease you enough to keep you going.

Director Eli Roth has been hit or miss with me. Some people found his first feature film Cabin Fever to be one of the most refreshing horror films to come out in recent memory, I on the other hand would have rather been doing anything other than watching that movie. When Hostel came out I was in no rush to go out and pay to see it, however when the DVD came out I was a bit more comfortable paying the $5 to rent it, and guess what? I loved it. I thought it was original, it had humor in the right places, and of course it had some of the goriest scenes I’ve seen in the last decade.

So when it was announced that Roth would be making Hostel: Part II I was more than excited to see what he could do to top the first film. As the months rolled on more and more information was leaked about the plot, actors, locations, etc. Although I wasn’t quite sure if using a group of female tourists would work quite as well, I was still more than willing to give it a shot when it hit theaters.

Well, Hostel: Part II has hit theaters, I paid my $11.50 ($23.00 if you count paying for someone else to see it) and I can safely say that nothing about that movie worked. At all. Hostel: Part II has the potential to be good (not great) but it really seems as if Roth and Co. were in a rush to get this out just so they could please the fans of the first one. The sequel didn’t have any of the strong points from the first film, and what people would consider to be the most entertaining scene of the film was only entertaining because of how ridiculously over-the-top and disturbing it was.

I’ll be the first to say that when it comes to horror movies I fully subscribe to the “the bloodier the merrier” idea, but when it’s all there is to a movie I tend to lose interest real fast. I mean let’s face it, shock value only lasts for so long and then it doesn’t become....well, shocking anymore.

Hostel: Part II centers around a group of girls, Beth (Lauren German) is an heiress that has traveled to Europe to escape her overwhelming wealth, and hopes to find a soul mate that will like her for more than just the loads of cash she has. Whitney (Bijou Philips) is the type of girl that loves to get wasted on whatever substance she can get her hands on the quickest, and then use that as an excuse to hook up with some random guy she meets. Rounding out the trio is Lorna (Heather Matarazzo) who is shy, reserved, and overly homesick. She doesn’t drink or do drugs, and really ends up being the only one of the three that we care anything about.

After being introduced to the characters I understood the personalities of each of them, but to be honest with you I really couldn’t have cared less about any of them. For me the movie was just a race to see which of them would get killed first, and in what manner. In the first Hostel I could relate to the characters in some way so it became more enjoyable to see how each of them ended up, however in Hostel: Part II I found myself relating to no one, and thus not caring about the movie.

The difference between this film and it’s predecessor is that unlike the characters from the first film, these girls don’t end up in the Hostel with the hopes of performing some kind of debauchary (well, at least two of the girls didn’t go for that). They wind up at the Hostel after being told of the natural hot springs by their newfound friend, who mysteriously seems to pop up wherever they are, and who also was their nude model while they were learning about art.

For those of you that have seen the first film, you pretty much know what happens after the girls arrive at the Hostel. It’s pretty much the same formula as the first, with little to no change in direction. In fact, the only difference I noticed was the sub-plot involving two men who have more money than they know what to do with being alerted (along with “butchers” across the globe) of the girl’s arrival at the hostel. Once they’re notified a bidding takes place to see who will get to kill who for what price....I wonder if eBay will implement this anytime soon?

We follow the two men as they travel to Europe with the intent of performing their first kill. One is an over-the-top guy who is seemingly more than ready to “do this,” and the other is more passive and reserved about actually killing an innocent girl...at least that’s what we’re lead to believe.

Overall Hostel: Part II just didn’t have the same charm (yes I said charm) the first one did. I didn’t care anything about the characters, and save for the last brutal act in the film (ladies prepare to cheer, and men prepare to hunch over in pain) I really didn’t think there was anything super shocking about the murders. We do get taken a bit more into the “secret society” that performs these acts, but in all honesty it doesn’t really do anything to help the film. As I walked out of the movie theater I couldn’t help but feel like I had just watched a sick twist on some fairy tale....not exactly what I wanted from a movie I had hoped would shock me, and maybe even gross me out.

My opinion. Wait for DVD.

Bamf here rematerializing from the void..

Knocked Up is the best Horror film I have ever seen.  Apatow made a film that is hilarious and frightening.  The story has the charm of a personal tale like Kevin Smith’s Chasing Amy.  I cannot give an assessment of camera work, lighting and edit choices.  I was completely wrapped into the characters’ story and anyone who no longer has their V card will walk out with birth control as their religion. 

I wouldn’t suggest taking a new date to this movie. It would be the equivalent of a woman not shaving her legs, or Shannyn Sossaman looking through the STD book in The Rules of Attraction. Men will swear off sex until the last residual of the third act surprise leaves their memory like the goatse(not a typo, do not google that).  I don’t see couples jumping right into bed after screening this one, not without a possibly uncomfortable conversation, but that’s probably a good thing.  While there is no question why this film earned its R rating—I feel it may very well be a necessary film for every teenager to see.  High School health teachers who are tasked to walk over the sex-ed for their class would be strengthened by screening this film (with consent of course) and could model a whole curriculum on the issues discussed.  Knocked Up gives parents and teachers a springboard for education that is relevant to the dry curriculum, filled with the usual giggles and sighs.  Instead of showing how to put a condom on to a banana—something I was taught, yet still have never done—it’s showing the consequences of why you should be sure to put the protection on.  I was kicked out of my sex Ed class in High School for laughing too much once.  They said I was being immature, I said I was laughing at the thought that I might actually have sex while still in High School.

I have no favorite scenes from the movie.  I love it all.  A lot of improv went into this production and they reaped gold from that move.  The story moves through the cast with clarity; no one gets lost.  Katherine Heigl and Seth Rogen give performances that do not feel acted at all.  They really nailed their roles and I think it has to do with the fact they weren’t restricted to what was on the page for the day.  No one steals the show per say, but Ryan Secrest has his moment to change my opinion of him ever so slightly like Bob Saget in Half Baked.  Paul Rudd is an actor I admire. Just look at the man’s resume filled with versatility and always delivering.  Who would have thought the gay guy from Object of My Affection could produce such a different performance in Anchorman (another Apatow production)?  In Knocked Up he gives the everyman take on a husband in the early years of an un-steady marriage.  He shows the side of parenting that the children never get to see; parents growing up and coming to terms with their responsibility.  Rudd is one of my favorites—I just have to glow about him. (And I don’t care what IMDB says, he is the shaved space monkey in Fight Club)

This movie maintains humor while incorporating a dramatization of real life events that many out there can relate to.  The Break-up did this very well and was a story I saw parts of my life in far too well.  In fact, during that film I had to tilt my head befuddled. There were a couple of times where I was like, oh my god, I have had this fight. Maybe that’s just a sad commentary on my dating life but the two films share valuable qualities.  Both had casts with chemistry.  And they both held no punches back on telling stories that involved more truth than the average audience is exposed to.  I’m looking at you Wild Hogs.

With nothing to do with luck, Apatow should see this film continue to succeed. I won’t call it a sleeper, but whenever a comedy breaks 15 mill for its opening weekend you know you have done something special.  Are the big numbers enjoyed because of a backlash against inflated fantasy films like Pirates 3, where at the end all I learned is that if you scorn a woman, she will end up a “big” problem and leave you with crabs?  Possibly.  We want sharp comedies that go beyond just F bombs and obligatory tit shots.  I called Knocked Up a horror at the beginning of this, and for me it was.  I was shifting in my seat and mangling a mint tin in my hand the entire time, living in Ben Stone’s changed life.  Apatow has been creating The Wonder Years for this generation albeit in different stories spanning adolescence to adulthood.  In Knocked Up he created a human comedy.  In my opinion he spins the notion that audiences only really respond to tales of woe and tragedy—great finesse is taken with real characters that connect with us and enlighten the heart.

{about}

When Skipper Martin sent me an e-mail and asked me to take a look at his book I was a little suspect.  I get a lot of e-mails of people wanting me to review their comic and for the most part they are pretty bad.  So just for giggles I followed the link to the “Bizarre New World" website and was very surprised.  The artwork I saw knocked my socks!  So I e-mailed Skipper back.  (here is the e-mail I sent him) “I just took a look at your site. If the writing is as good as the pencils and coloring on this book then you are going to have a hit! The artwork is better than 95% of the crap Marvel and DC are pumping out." So he sends me a link to take a look at the first two issues and the writing IS as good as the artwork! I should have known as soon as I saw the APE Entertainment logo on the comic that it was going to be good.  APE has published some of the best comics (The Black Coat, Athena Voltaire) on the market in the past couple of years.  “Bizarre New World" will continue the string of original, well written and superbly illustrated books that has become a hallmark of APE.

So what’s the book about you say?  It’s about a guy who discovers he can fly!  Isn’t that the dream of every fanboy and fangirl out there?  The great thing about this story is that Martin approaches flying from the wonderful, scary, addicting feeling that it would be.  The main character is very human with an extraordinary talent.  Christopher Provencher pencils and Wes Dzioba colors are what really caught my eye in the first place.  The colors are warm and realistic and add depth and character to some beautiful pencils.  Christopher Provencher has a great style that makes me BELIEVE the story.  I don’t know how to explain that, it’s just what I feel.  Check it out for yourselves, I promise you won’t be disappointed.

Is this the end song of Spider-Man, is it possible to have too much time to make a film, or does any of this really matter when the film breaks box office records?

Bamf here rematerializing from the void..

Here is an excerpt of a note I wrote to myself as I walked out of the theater Thursday night/Friday morning

...but don’t panic, its just Spider-Man.

It was a night filled with electric anticipation at the midnight picture show.  These 12:01am premiers never disappoint when it comes to an audience who wants to be part of the first general public to see their coveted film.  The ages of Spider-Man 3’s audience ranged from 14 to 40, but it was mostly high school kids.  A rambunctious lot filled with that uncertain angst with that intangible need to belong, but at the same time be different.  Two hours out from showtime the place was already packed.  Given this turnout, it will be no surprise when the 100 million dollars worth of receipts come in on Monday (closer to 125 is my prediction).  When you have an audience of young and excited people to see a film, all collected in a single auditorium, you have to expect that events are going to get a little crazy leading up to the show.  The restless youth had about 10 beach balls being hit about, catcalls came from the daring and droll as either a busty blonde or Spidey-masked fan entered the forum. About 30 minutes out security had entered and taken all the balls away—the crowd turned south on them and the scene would be best described as ugly.  Now somehow every time I am at a midnight show, there always seem to be someone in there with a birthday and this night was no different.  I think this is just a reaction to kids getting bored in their seats, like telling someone your mom’s dead after they insult her economic plight or mental faculties.  So 5 minutes out the now seemingly sold out show was joined together in a birthday chorus.  Then the staff came out to the front and announced it was time for the premier of SM3.  Not a moment too soon the crowd was starting to resemble the scene from Gremlins when Snow White is being screened.  It was time for the show.

Raimis’ film shows why he was correct in never wanting to do anything with Venom as was stated in numerous interviews of the past couple years.  In effort to give balance to the evil nature of the black suit, he really went over the top when it came to making Peter Parker look like an utter buffoon.  This is a natural staple of story telling, match water to rock, give opposing emotions and find your moments to underscore the weight of the character’s world.  But this nuance was done so poorly I’m working on the theory that it may very well have been done so intentionally.  I think Raimi and crew are done with the franchise, and as one last movement they made sure that the audience would be left with a sour taste after their last installment.  There is no question on whether Spider-Man 4 will happen, but it wont be with the same billing ever again.  The film plays so far to camp that at one point my mind was wandering and I began to make excuses for what was going on.  This cannot be the real movie I thought, I’m in some sort of joke theater, ha-ha, wtf?  In that fleeting moment it was only a misstep in judgment like wanting to believe there’s a 7-foot rabbit named Harvey.

This was Superman 2 all over again—merged with the 60’s Batman television shows.  But Sam Raimi is no Richard Lester, which makes this unacceptable.  And there in lies the problems I have with this offering.  With the rumored 300+ million dollar budget, I see how every penny was spent perfectly when it comes to the FX of the film.  But just dazzling spectacles of multi angled heroism a good film does not make.  There are genuine moments that pull you right back into the film and deliver the expected and un-expected.  The emotion however runs dry and my audience was rolling in the aisles laughing…during scenes that were supposed to be poignantly addressed.  When your Peter Parker is crying for the third time on the screen, and each time the audience reacts with laughter, the story has failed.  Given the history of the character Gwen Stacy, and taking in how she was utilized in this, her wasted stint should have been left to the pages of Spider-Man lore.  The infamous Jazz club scene when Peter is really turning the screws on his “darkness” was the deathblow for the picture.  And when Gwen decides to get the hell out of there, the only thing she forgot to do was ask Parker for her eyeliner back.
And come-on, you put mascara on Spidey.  You have to be kidding me, and I’m not even going to touch the ridiculous goth/alternateen hair.  Boooooooooo.

The only characters that shine in this are Mary Jane and Harry both in acting as well as the story.  Although I am still trying to rinse the awful stench of his participation of that preview screening I took in a few weeks ago; James Franco puts a solid performance in giving the material he had to work with.  Even when giving the task to paint a table of fruit, an ability I was not aware of for the Goblin he is still charming just the same.  There’s also the diner scene when Harry is defecating on Peters heart that mirrors the same setting in Spider-Man 2, including MJ’s, or would it be Kirstens Dunst’s lazy eye?  The best spin I could place on it is, great attention to detail?  I’m not a Dunst hater like so many out there.  I feel she did wonderful in her last reprisal of Mary Jane Watson.  There are moments that feel a little to self reflective on the real actress, instead of the story’s character that brings welcome relative emotion to a film that mostly is just spinning its wheels in disgrace.  The best reason to see Spider-Man 3 multiple times will be without a doubt Bruce Campbell’s cameo.  He holds the best laugh out loud performance this year thus far, and I can only thank him for it.

The problems with SM3 for me can be best summarized like this.  Sony/fans demanded that the director take on story line he wanted nothing to do with, they spent far too much time making this film as you never can really nail down what color MJ’s hair is as it changes from red to auburn to brownish blond (tis my guess that she was not wearing the wig this time around as done in the previous installments, great call for a what, 3 year schedule? Did they learn nothing from LOTR?), and I don’t think they had Spider-Man do one jaunting quip the entire movie.  Danny Elfman, the series composer walked away from the film a while ago, and has been very outspoken on how he will not work with Raimi ever again and the score certainly suffers for it.  That’s sad as the director and the composer had a long relationship and as I understood it, Raimi was asking Elfman to essentially rip musical cues directly out of his past work, like Darkman for the presentation in SM3 (and this only helps my theory that Raimi really just phoned this one in).  Given the tone Elfman uses when he was speaking about the debacle, I half suspect he knew what was going to be the end product of the whole, and wanted nothing to do with it.

If you loved the movie today, you will hate it tomorrow.  This third installment just does not match up with the prior two.  But don’t panic, its just Spider-Man—right?

{about}

I just got back from seeing Spider-Man 3 at my local IMAX theaters and it’s with a heavy heart that I sit here and write this review. During the week I work until 4:30am, and usually don’t get to bed until some time after 5:30am, however today was different as I was willing to sacrifice my precious slumber for the chance to catch a 6:30am showing of Spider-Man 3 on the big, big screen.

As I write this, I wish I would’ve just gone home and gone to bed.

In what was promised to be the best film in the franchise, Spider-Man 3 makes so many mistakes it’s almost unforgivable. While I won’t spoil any major plot points in the film I will say that much like last year’s X-Men 3 (which I thought was a disaster from start to finish), Spider-Man 3 tries achieve too many things, and as a result fails on almost every level.

I’ve been a fan of Spider-Man for as long as I can remember. I’ve always considered Spidey to be one of my “top guys” along with Superman, and Batman. When the first film came out over 5 years ago (can you believe it’s been that long?) I was literally speechless as I watched one of my childhood idols come to life and swing thru the skyline of New York City. Then in 2004 when Spider-Man 2 was released I was blown away even more as I watched one of my favorite Spidey villains, Doc Ock come to life and battle Spider-Man in some of the most intense action sequences I’ve ever seen.
You see the first two films had it all; character development, solid storylines, amazing action, and most of all a loving approach from a director that respected the characters and their universe....basically the first two films had everything the third lacked.

Honestly, I’m almost at a loss for words. I wanted to like this movie, I really did. I mean I wouldn’t have stood in line for any old movie, but I would do it for Spider-Man because I had come to expect excellence with these films. In the weeks and days building up to the film’s release I found myself with those feelings of excitement of once again watching one of my boyhood heroes return to the big screen. Leaving the theater I couldn’t have been more disappointed if I tried.

The main problem with Spider-Man 3 is the seemingly carefree attitude the writers took with the script. The first two films had solid stories that were carefully crafted around story arcs from the comics. Spider-Man 3 features a script that has so many plot holes I couldn’t even begin list them all. It seems like any time the writers found themselves backed into a corner they used the most ridiculous and thoughtless outs.

When it was revealed that Spider-Man would be facing off against three villains my first reaction was "oh no, here comes Batman Forever all over again" and honestly I was right. The problem with trying to include too many characters into a single film is that none of them get the amount of attention they deserve. How can you possibly fit the origins of three villains into one movie? Simple, you can’t.

The Sandman is a cool character, and Thomas Hayden Church plays him to perfection in this film. The problem with the character in the film is that his origin is so rushed, you don’t have time to connect with him or sympathize with the sob story they stuck him with. Most of the scenes involving Sandman feature him as some giant sand monster terrorizing the city....how can you connect with that? Speaking of the giant sand monsters, at certain points during the film I had flashbacks of The Mummy. I halfway expected Brenden Frasier to run in and save the day.

The symbiote (or black costume for you non geek speakers) saga is arguably the best story arc in the Spider-Man series, but what really bothered me about this film was the writers took great material and made it a watered down version of what it should be. Honestly the black suit saga is a film in itself. From the time it arrives on Earth, to the time it bonds itself with Eddie Brock and creates Venom, there’s enough story to carry a 2 hour film and then some. What happened in this movie is that there was so much going on you really didn’t even get to see the suit’s full potential. In a movie that was heavily billed as “fight the darkness within” we really don’t get to see much of Peter’s dark side. Sure we see him bush his hair in front of his face in sort of a quasi-emo style, and shout out a few people, but the majority of Peter’s “evil side” are portrayed thru dance sequences....I’ll repeat that just so you know I’m clear. The majority of Peter’s “evil side” are portrayed thru dance sequences. That’s right, Peter Parker takes a page from John Travolta’s book in a scene that had me shaking my head and asking my friend Nick if we had accidentally walked into Spider-Man: The Musical.

We all know that the symbiote bonds itself with Peter because it’s attracted to his power and inner struggle. Once it’s bonded with him he claims that he likes the feel of the suits power...unfortunately for us, we really never see any of that power. Maybe I missed something, but while wearing the suit Spider-Man wasn’t any faster, or stronger, or anything. He was more aggressive, but that’s it...once again I felt totally cheated.

The movie however isn’t without it’s good points. Once again Raimi casts each character brilliantly, and really makes you believe that these actors really are the characters they’re portraying...it’s just a shame they didn’t have more to work with. Bryce Dallas Howard looks absolutely stunning as Gwen Stacy, and in her few scenes she completely over shadows Mary Jane. It’s funny because I would’ve much rather seen Howard as MJ and Dunst as Stacy, shame it didn’t work out like that. Howard is so sweet and charming in her role that I almost wanted her story line from the comics to be handed off to MJ (her being killed off). And as I mentioned before, Thomas Hayden Church does a great job as Flint Marko/Sandman. Not only does he look like Marko from the comics, but he proved that he can hold his own when it comes to an action sequence. Topher Grace also does a great job as Eddie Brock, who serves as almost a counter to Peter Parker’s shy, nerdy guy. Brock is loud, arrogant, and he’s got bleached hair...need I say more? As Venom, Grace really doesn’t have much to work with as the majority of the characters scenes are done in CGI. I will spoil one thing and tell you than while as Venom, Brock’s voice doesn’t change a bit which was very surprising to me. There is no reference by Venom as “we”, he doesn’t have any cool effects on his voice, basically he has a normal voice coming from those big snarling teeth.

While the new cast was great, I personally felt like the returning cast (save for J.K Simmons) almost gave up. Tobey didn’t seem to have that same sparkle in his eye while playing Peter as he did in the first two. Honestly, I think Tobey has run his course as Spider-Man and he’s ready to hang up the webs. I’m not saying he did a bad job, but I just wasn’t that convinced by his performance. Same thing with Dunst as MJ, who in the movie couldn’t be more annoying if she tried. Both actors have played these characters for over five years, and I think it’s obvious that they’ve done all they can and they’re ready to move on. I will say that James Franco delivered a solid performance as Harry Osborne, and really stood out above the rest. The same can be said for Simmons as J.Jonah Jameson, and the always amazing Bruce Campbell.

The visual FX in the movie are a sight to see, and will really make you sit back in amazement. Once Peter dons the black suit and sets out to pursue Sandman in the sewers, he does a pretty amazing web swing thru tunnels and pipes that I thought was particularly impressive. The one shot in the film that stood out for me was the shot from the original trailers that showed Spidey (in black) perched on top of the church....it was very powerful, but it only served to further my disappointment that the same thought couldn’t have been put into more aspects of the movie. There are a few scenes in the movie that will make you smile, but it’s still not enough to say this was a great film, or even a good one for that mattered.

Most people are going in wanting to see Spider-Man and Venom square off against each other. While the two do battle, it’s not what you’d expect at all. The fight scenes between these two are so quick and so dark, it’s hard to tell what’s going on. Venom does give Spidey a beating, but it doesn’t have that epic feel that you’d expect these two to have on the big screen....actually it reminded me of the disappointment I had when Wolverine and Sabertooth first met in the original X-Men movie. It was cool, but not what I expected.

As much as it pains me to say, Spider-Man 3 was a MAJOR let down in my eyes. I walked in with high expectations, and once I realized those expectations weren’t going to be met, I felt like walking out. While I didn’t want the first two movies to end, I found myself glancing at my watch wondering how much time was over before I could leave the theater....that’s not something I like to say when it comes to a Spider-Man film.

Overall I’d say Spider-Man 3 was a big disappointment from start to end (in case I hadn’t made that clear enough already) and it saddened me to see the film makers take such a rushed approach to what could’ve been an amazing film. The general public will eat this up because it’s got humor, action, and suspense, but the hardcore geek audience (including you reading this) will probably walk out (maybe early) feeling much like I did.

I like Sam Raimi a lot. I like his style, I like his humor, and I think overall he’s a brilliant director, but it almost seemed like he gave up during this one. I know he’s not a fan of the Venom character, and I truly believe he was forced into including him in the film, but still...you can do better than that Sam. Up until now I was one of those people that said if you can’t reunite the original cast/director then don’t continue the franchise. After seeing Spider-Man 3 I’m not saying....let some one else who has some fresh ideas have a shot at it...just don’t give it to Bret Ratner.

Bamf here rematerializing from the void..

I can remember reading an article years ago in Rolling Stone about how the band R.E.M. had a clause in their contract that made it so a percentage of their albums had to be made in vinyl.  I believe Pearl Jam had a similar deal.  Now while the quality of the audio reproduced on vinyl records is inferior to a digital remastering that can be done today – there is a certain charm that comes with those needle drag pops and clicks.  Sure records are dated, impractical, and all together cumbersome.  But when it’s your turn to step to the plate, don’t you want to use Roy Hobbes bat from The Natural?  I feel that when Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino started hashing out the idea of Grindhouse, this is what was in the back of their minds. QT is constantly reminding folks of his love for 70s exploitation flicks, and Rodriguez is shaking up Hollywood by not only doing things cheaper and faster, but Trouble Maker Studios is also nowhere near Hollywood.  Did they succeed in accomplishing their vision? Certainly.  But by working so independently what you end up with in this case are moments of brilliance stifled by scenes of boredom.

I have mixed opinions on Grindhouse: the double feature containing Planet Terror and Death Proof.  I expected that I was going to enjoy Tarantino’s DP more than PT yet by the end my feelings were the exact opposite.  Death Proof has some wicked car chase scenes underlined by the fact that there is no CGI to be found.  That in its self is refreshing, but also is a mute point when the dialogue and general story pacing lacks a fire to keep it interesting.  Now, my lack of familiarity with the Grindhouse mythos may be why I do not wholly understand what I’m missing.  I just get the sense that not nearly as much time was spent on DP as there was with PT from page to screen.  All throughout Grindhouse the print is well worn; there are scratch marks, sound skips, and missing reels that really bring home the ambiance of what they sought out to create.  But by the time you get to the last half of DP, it seems the post department forgot what they had done in the entire first two hours of show.  In fact the grainy picture goes away, the speaker pops are gone and suddenly it seems like you are watching a BMW short, sans Madonna.  In the end, I’m willing to bet that Death Proof got the short end of the stick on this one.  And it shows in not only the editing, but also the script.  Kurt Russell doesn’t really get his John Travolta revival (Pulp Fiction) and basically plays Snake Plissken meets Jack Burton.  But his cries of mercy are funny enough.

Planet Terror was good fun.  Cameos from the Trouble Maker universe are to be found everywhere.  And though the credits show Rodriguez as the sole writer – lines that spewed forth from Dr. Dakota Block (Marley Shelton) absolutely drip with Tarantinos signature.  Getting to see Michael Biehn do another hard-ass role a la Terminator was well received by this reviewer.  And anytime Nicky Katt steps on screen he steals the show: Dazed and Confused, Boiler Room, hell even Sin City. Godspeed Nicky Katt.  The star of the show is without a doubt Rose McGowan as Cherry, the one legged Go-Go dancer with aspirations of doing Stand-up comedy.  It’s not the role she was born to play, but certainly the role she was meant to play.  In saying that, you have to put it all in perspective.  Saying McGowan is great in this could be compared to saying a hammerhead shark is more mobile in the Pacific Ocean then the Mohabi desert.  All jest aside, she really does well in this.  Playing it straight and sexy, she is your star.  Rose wears red lipstick better then anyone in the past 20 years of cinema.  And I include Jessica Rabbit in that comparison.

Now with the two films out of the way, we can get to what really entertains.  The fake trailers.  Machete, with a line like “They just f*ed with the wrong Mexican!” You cannot go wrong.  Werewolf Women of the S.S., how salaciously shocking!  I loved it.  I wish they had played with this idea just a little bit more, instead of giving two different features highlighted by fun no-movies.  They could have stuck with the short content and given an amalgam of scenes from different stories that played true to the Grindhouse theme, with overtly sexualized scenes and deviantly bloody murders that would play right to the audience’s wants.  What were the intentions of the filmmakers?  Did they set out to prove that an interesting and engaging story can be told while still staying true to the model of the Grindhouse? Or rather, did they set out to recreate the visceral experience of sitting in a late night picture house with sticky floors and squeaky seats, creating an ambience that would send the audience back to an experience since forgotten?  Grindhouses have an interesting story that the 20 something crowd is not that all familiar with.  The GH would show “exploitation” films that catered to more sensationalistic aspects of a story like sex and violence in an effort to bring cash in off the masses for uncomfortable scenes rather then enriching dialogue.  These films would tour the houses in regional markets since budgets did not include the latitude for such extravagancies as 3000 prints that the major films of today enjoy.  Because of this, a GH film would become well worn over its tenure and even would have entire reels missing as projectionist would steal their favorite parts out of the movie, typically the sex scenes that were on the borderline of pornography in a day that did not enjoy the accessibility of the net.  There are parts of this Grindhouse I really loved; with most other parts I struggled to stay awake.  This is why the film will not be commercially successful, but I’m sure will find a welcome audience on DVD.  That in its self is a shame because this really should be seen only with your close mates, and a rambunctious midnight crowd.

Side notes:
I was more entertained by the Pirates of the Caribbean 3 trailer then I was during the entirety of Pirates 2, so that’s positive. 

While walking into the most regal of all theaters I have visited, the Irvine Spectrum, I approached a man holding a sign that read “Preview Screening”.  After short introductions I received two tix to an advance screening of Camille, an action flick starring James Franco and Sienna Miller.  As it turns out, the film had nothing to do with any sort of action, besides my bile duct, and I can liken the whole experience to having my brain sodomized.  But more on that, when the film is finally released…if ever.

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I just got back from seeing any early showing of director Kevin Munroe’s TMNT and on the ride home I was trying to think of a funny and clever way to express my feelings about the Turtles and their latest big screen incarnation, and to be quite honest with you the best I can come up with is “awesome!”

Ever since 1993’s less than stellar Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III our heroes have been absent from movie theaters, but not from die-hard fan’s hearts. Apparently hearing the cry of millions of turtles fans everywhere, Warner Bros snatched up the film rights once New Line Cinema let them go and hired writer/director Kevin Munroe to resurrect the four reptilian brothers for a new generation.

Opting to go more of the Superman Returns way, and less of the Batman Begins way, Munroe decided to present the turtles in the same continuity as the other films (from my best guess TMNT takes place after the events of the third film as evident my the magic scepter in Splinter’s “trophy room") using the wonders of CGI. And for that I thank him. TMNT not only looks beautiful, but does an impeccable job of bringing the mannerisms of our heroes to life both as individuals, and as a family. I can remember the first time I saw the turtles come to life in 1990’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I was mesmerized as I sat there and watched a quartet of walking, talking turtles do battle against the evil Shredder and his Foot Soldiers. 17 years later (with no shame) I can say I felt that same feeling again sitting in the theater surrounded by an audience that ranged from 3 to 40.

I have to hand it to Munroe, as he really showcased the “united we stand, divided we fall” aspect that is the very foundation of the turtles. Throughout the film we’re shown each turtle as they learn to adapt to their newfound roles in life. Leonardo traveled to Central America on the wishes of Master Splinter in the hopes he would return a more confident leader. Michelangelo works children’s parties as “Cowabunga Carl.” Donatello continues to use his intellect as an IT phone specialist, and Raphael moonlites as the mysterious vigilante known as “The Nightwatcher.”

Although the plot’s not incredibly complex, it does the job of presenting a threat to the World, and reuniting our heroes to stop it. Before Master Splinter gives his blessing for the turtles to return to the surface and get back to doing what they do best, they must first overcome their greatest challenge yet: learning how to become a family once again.

As I said before, the animation is gorgeous, and the design of the film and it’s characters borrows heavily from the angular look from the original comics. For those of you not familiar with the look of the original books (again, shame on you) let’s just say it has a similar design to Disney’s The Incredibles. As much as I loved the original films, I can now safely say THIS is the way the turtles should be done from now on.

The fight scenes in the film are sure to make even the harshest critic stand up an applaud. Once scene in particular shows us the fight we’ve seen coming for over 20 years as Leonardo and Raphael square off against one another on top of a roof in the rain...it really is a stunning scene to behold. While I won’t tell you the outcome of the scene, I can tell you the the planning, and choreography is just as good, if not better than anything you’ll see in live action.

Aside from the beautiful animation, the voice cast is where this film really shines. Featuring the talents of Patrick Stewart (X-Men) as Max Winters, Sarah Michelle Gellar (Buffy) as April O’Neil, Chris Evans (Fantastic Four) as Casey Jones, Ziyi Zhang (Crouching Tiger) as Karai, and the late Mako (who the film is dedicated to) as Master Splinter, this is one of the most well cast, and best acted animated films I’ve ever seen. Even Morpheus himself, Lawrence Fishburne lends his vocal talents to the film as it’s narrator.

I’d also like to give special mention to the four actors who portray our heroes in the film. While they may not be household names to most of us (unless you’re like me and follow voice acting) James Arnold Taylor (Leonardo), Mitchell Whitfield (Donatello), Mikey Kelley (Michelangelo), and Nolan North (Raphael) really do an outstanding job of properly portraying each turtle and their own unique personality. I loved the way each one of them sounded.

While I found the film to be a bit on the short side, I really have little to complain about. The dialogue is great, and actually had me laughing during several parts, and the story, although lacking one of the series’ major characters, works just fine. If you’ve ever been a fan of the turtles, collected the toys, sang the theme song, or used the word “cowabunga” then TMNT is the film for you. If you’ve never done any of those things, then at least take your kids to see it because you were obviously born before the big “turtle-boom” of the 80’s....I mean come on, who doesn’t love the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles??

What makes a game? Graphics, gameplay, story… Is it just one of these things or is it a combination? Can you sacrafice graphics for gameplay? Yes. Can you sacrafice gameplay for story? Probably not. Developers are always trying to find the happy medium for all new releases, especially new franchises.

When the first God of War was released, Sony Computer Entertainment sacraficed nothing. The graphics were great on the PS2, the gameplay easy to pick up and build on and the story was out of this world! Taking existing mythology storylines and slightly skewing them in another direction. If there was one thing that kept me playing, it was the storyline.

For those who don’t know, you play as Kratos a.k.a. The Ghost of Sparta. At the end of the first game you are crowned the new God of War by defeating Aries who is the [previous] God of War. You start off at pretty much the same point as where you ended the first game, on your throne. The same narrator from the first game (who you surprisingly learn the identity of later on in the game) graces us with her excellent vocabulary and suspenceful storytelling right from the start. Kratos feels underappreciated by the Olympians and rages on in his own path of destruction.

The Gods tire of his insulence and successfully drain Kratos of all his Godliness by the end of the first (introductory) level. You are allied by some unexpected individuals as you go off onto your journey of regaining your powers and waging war against the Olympians. As with the first game you will usually see the same locations a number of times throughout your journey due to the excellent level design. You could easily spend 20 minutes trying to figure out on puzzle before you realize your a couple of hours worth of gameplay away from being able to solve it.

It’s perhaps all of this puzzle solving that carries the game for approximately 11 to 14 hours. I spent plenty of time looking for everything I could and it took me 13:30. After I completed the adventure I peeked at the official guide only to find out that I missed a big chunk of the special pickups.

Not to worry though. God of War II is worth a purchase because of all the Treasures that you unlock after your first time through. One of the gems of this collection of Treasures is Challenge of the Titans. In this 7 level challenge your are tasked with such missions as ripping out a Cyclops’ eye in a certain amount of time and killing a certain amount of enemies while they are airborn. By the 4th or 5th challenge you’ll want to throw your controller down and quit God of War forever… but we all know that won’t happen. The normal unlockables are there as well. The ability to watch all the cutscenes, extra costumes that change your stats and Titan mode. Titan mode is also known as Impossible mode to everyone who plays this game.

Picking up the control and playing will take any newcomer no time to get used to the action. With popup boxes explaining every new ability to you (which you have the option of turning off), no instruction will be left out. The controls are identical to its predecessor in every way accept for one minor change. The O button is now the button that you rapidly press to open doors, rather than the old button which was R2. So if you were happy with God of War 1’s controls you’ll feel right at home here. Nothing more to say than perfect control scheme.

Last but surely not least is the visuals. I played this game on the PS3, Sony promised that if God of War II was played on their next gen console it would get next gen 720p HD capability. If you were to tell someone who didn’t know any better that it was a PS3 game, they would easily believed you. The high Resolution cutscenes look flawless. You can see individual teeth while people are talking, the pores in peoples skins and the smallest detail in the environment. Let’s call the visuals a Playstation 2.5 game.

Needless to say this is easily one of Playstation 2’s best games of all time. It’s visuals are unparalelled by any last gen game on any console and the storytelling is second to none. The plethora of interviews and behind the scenes looks of the game on it’s second disc doesn’t hurt either. If you’re a fan of hectic but thoughtful games this one is definitely for you.

The Ryan is on vacation this week so I got his permission to cover for him and review a game I know I’ve been waiting for ever since it was announced.

Today is a big day for TMNT fans as it not only means 3 more days until the highly anticipated film is released, but it also marks the release of the next-gen video game based on the film. Coming from Ubisoft (who took over the license from Konami), TMNT takes players into the World of Raphael, Leonardo, Michelangelo and Donatello as they explore the city in search of a mysterious new evil force that threatens to take over.

At first glance it’s not hard to tell this isn’t like any other Turtles game that we’ve seen. Since it’s based on the upcoming film it gives us the chance to see each character on their own, and later on in the game as a unit. The first level takes us to the jungles of Latin America where Leonardo is stalking a group of soldiers who are seemingly up to no good. It’s here where thru Master Splinter’s guidance we learn the mechanics of the game. Fans of Ubisoft’s Prince of Persia titles are in for a treat since the Turtles movements are almost identical to that of the Prince.

That’s a good thing.

My biggest problem with the last series of games from Konami was that they seemingly forgot the whole Ninja element to the Ninja Turtles. The characters moved so stiffly, and only had three attacks total...and blocking? forget about it. This is not the case in TMNT. From the first time Leonardo unsheathes his katannas it’s obvious that the fighting in this game isn’t just a simple button masher like the previous ones, and actually requires skill to pull off the various combos and different fighting styles. Speaking of fighting styles, the developers are to be commended on the amount of attention they put into making each character unique and not just the same Turtle with a different color mask.

True to their original form, each Turtle although similar to his brothers, possess traits that make their fighting style unique to them. For instance Leonardo is very precise, and his combos chain together nicely. Donatello’s weapon (the bo staff) is slower than the rest, but dishes out a fair amount of damage and also allows him to vault across spaces. Michelangelo is extremely quick and once you get him going he spins on his back in an almost ninja-breakdance move that sends enemies flying. Raphael is the strongest of the group and his attacks deal out the most damage, but his sais are limited to up close attacks, however once you get into his combos he’s able to throw them at whoever is in his way.

Just like the emphasis on the new film is about family, so it is true in the game. Although TMNT is only one player (I was majorly disappointed to find this out) it does allow players to call upon all four of the Turtles at any times (as long as you’re not in character specific levels), and utilize the team aspect to pull off maneuvers such as tandem attacks, and moves that let your brothers help fling you across rooftops that are too far for a normal jump...it actually works pretty nicely, and you’re rewarded heavily for working as a family throughout each level.

The game’s story is told thru footage from the film, and some almost cell shaded comic book cutscenes. When playing character specific levels such as Leonardo’s adventures in the jungle, or Raph’s outings as the vigilante known as “The Nightwatcher” the Turtles each relive the level’s events and narrate them to Splinter. It sounds a bit weird, but it actually works nicely.

Visually the game presents an interesting take on the world of the Ninja Turtles. While I wouldn’t quite call it cell shaded, the game definitely has elements that are very close to looking “animated”...this is probably an attempt to keep the game in sync with the film’s CGI look and feel. At certain times I felt the graphics weren’t very next gen, and at other times I thought they looked just fine particularly when playing “Ninja Tag” on the rooftops of New York...that level was impressive, and HUGE. Who knew New York City rooftops could look so glamorous?

Aside from the lack of multiplayer, I would say the game’s biggest flaw comes in the sometimes linear gameplay, and sometimes overly frustrating controls. While the levels are fairly open ended, the game does keep you on a certain path, and takes you to designated areas where an onslaught of enemies will attack you until you dispatch of them and the “area clear” sign flashes on the screen. For those hoping for a lengthy gaming experience, I hate to break it to you but the game can be beaten in just around 4-6 hours...unless you go back and try to earn enough coins to purchase everything, but honestly it’s really not worth it.

Overall TMNT breathes new life into a dying video game franchise, and shows that the Turtles just needed the right company to truly flex their mutated ninja muscle. I wasn’t expected much given the track record of the previous games, but what I got was a surprisingly enjoyable gaming experience featuring my favorite heroes in a half shell. Now, if they could only implement the group aspect from games like X-Men Legends or Ultimate Alliance (allowing players to switch at will while controlling four characters) into the inevitable sequels I would be in heaven.

Having never really played games like Magic The Gathering, Naruto, or Pokemon I wasn’t really sure what to expect when I heard a card game based on one of my favorite TV shows, Ben 10 was being released. However, after playing with my cousin for about 15min I can safely say that fans of the genre are in for a treat.

I’ll be honest with you, I’ve never been much into card games that don’t deal with money or articles of clothing. When I received a press release from Bandai stating that they were releasing a new card game based on the hit show Ben 10 I sort of rolled my eyes and thought "anything for a buck." After I was contacted by the people hyping the release of the game my interest started to build. I mean, I’ve always associated those kinds of games with the people that even I look at and call “geek” (and that’s saying something). You go to things like the Comic Con and you see those people dressed in costume having full out tournaments complete with arguing, bickering, and accusations of cheating....it’s priceless, really.

However when I was offered a set of the new Ben 10 collectible cards to review I couldn’t pass it up. If anything I wanted to see the packaging and the artwork, since I love how it looks on the toys. The other day FED EX rang my door and delivered a small package. Once I opened it, I was already impressed with how unique the packaging for the card game is....ok so now my interest was piqued a bit more.

I called my cousin (who’s 11) and asked him if he’d heard about the new game. After listening to him tell me how he’s been waiting to get a “starter set” (I’m learning here) I thought I’d play Mr. Cool and hit him with the "oh yeah? I just got starter set A and B, as well as 3 extra packs of cards." Just as I expect he replied with "NO WAY! ah man I want some!" so I invited him to come over and play (a.k.a teach me how to play). After about 15min of getting to know how the game is played, and learning about the different cards I can easily see why some people get so caught up in these games.

What I liked about the game (aside from the packaging and artwork) was the different characters, and abilities each card posesses. While I’m still getting used to how it’s played exactly, and the strategy behind it (I lost about 4x in a row) I can easily say that fans of the show, and of the genre in general will find something new and refreshing with the Ben 10 collectible card game. While Magic The Gathering takes you into the world of wizards and magicians, Ben 10 takes you into the world of Ben Tennyson and his alien hero counterparts. During the game I actually watched as my cousin got excited that he found a Heatblast card, and completely wiped out any chance I had of victory....it was sad.

Overall I would say that while I doubt I’ll become a hardcore Magic fan, I did find the Ben 10 game to be fun. Maybe it’s because I’m a big fan of the show, or maybe it’s because it really does offer something different to a game that’s been done so many different ways. Either way fans of the show will definitely pick up on this one as they get to play as their favorite characters and flex some of that alien muscle.

Now if you’ll excuse me I’d like to go silence my cousin’s bragging by showing him how to play a little game I call poker....no alien heroes to save him this time.

Right now, I think it’s safe to say that Hellboy is hot (no pun intended). With a successful feature film in 2003, an ongoing monthly comic, a follow up feature film in the works, and now these new animated features premiering on DVD, I think it’s safe to say that “Big Red” has cemented his place in pop culture.

That being said, it doesn’t mean that everything with the Hellboy name is good. Case in point, the new direct-to-DVD feature entitled Hellboy: Blood and Iron. Following on the heels of the successful “Sword of Storms,” the film has our heroes sent to investigate the supernatural activity at an old mansion turned tourist attraction. When the team discovers they’re dealing with a vampire from Professor Broom’s past with a grudge to settle, it’s up to them to stop the creature and ensure Professor Broom’s safety.

When I received my DVD screener of “Blood and Iron” the other day I was all to happy to run inside and pop it into the DVD player. Really enjoying the previous “Sword of Storms,” I had high hopes for this film as I had read that it dealt with a female vampire from Broom’s past, and let’s face it....who doesn’t like vampires? About 30min into the film (total runtime of 116min) my hopes were dashed when I realized this wasn’t “Sword of Storms”....not even close.

The film itself isn’t BAD, it just feels really, really rushed. While it was obvious from beginning to end that “Sword of Storms” was a labor of love, this film just felt like an attempt to capitalize on the success of it’s predecessor. The reason I liked the first Hellboy animated film was because on top of it being visually stunning, it had a solid story, and reunited the live action film’s cast, which always lends itself to the continuity. With the exception of the returning cast, this film has none of those qualities.

While watching the film I kept wondering if my screener was a test version. When I say “test version” I mean a version where not all the FX and sound are completely finished. The animation in the film was good, but that’s it. In a time when blending 2D and 3D animation is the standard, having “good” animation just doesn’t fly anymore...it has to be great. For the most part the characters look good (there’s that word again), however during certain scenes the perspective on the characters becomes extremely distorted and almost makes them look like those super D characters commonly found in anime.

Setting the animation quality aside, it’s the film’s story that really turned me off. Honestly, during the entire course of the film I felt like I was watching every vampire flick I’d ever seen. I mean here you’re dealing with a female vampire that kills young women so she can bathe in their blood and keep her own beauty...ok, sounds good enough right? Sure, if it hadn’t been done 100 other times before. Then, the vampire turns an unsuspecting human into her werewolf slave to send after HB and his crew....didn’t we just see this is films like Van Helsing?? It’s all been done before.

It really kills me to say something negative about anything related to Hellboy because I’ve been a fan of the character since it’s creation, but this film was about as bland as they come. Where as “Sword of Storms” pitted Hellboy against Thunder and Lightning, this film just tries to liven (no pun intended) things up by making it’s villians seem fresh, and unique but in doing so it just goes to reinforce how unoriginal and boring they really are....almost like they tried too hard with this one.

One good thing I can say about this film is the quality performance each actor gave in their respective part. Ron Pearlman returns as Hellboy (like there was anyone else who could do it) and delivers another solid performance as the adolescent monster hunter. I can’t say enough good things about Pearlman in the part. Whether he’s playing HB in the live action film, or just providing the voice, this is the part Pearlman was born to play. Also returning is Selma Blair as Liz Sherman, who despite her slightly odd appearance in the film (is it just me or does she look hispanic in animated form?) delivers another great performance. Doug Jones once again impresses me as Abe Sapien, delivering a different, albeit, refreshing performance from Abe’s live action counterpart voiced by David Hyde Pierce. And of course what Hellboy film would be complete without the always brillaint John Hurt returning as Professor Broom? Do I even need to say how good he is? I didn’t think so.

Overall Hellboy: Blood and Iron just wasn’t what I was hoping it to be. I had hoped to get a follow up just as good, if not better as the previous “Sword of Storms,” and instead what I got was a film that seemed forced and extremely rushed. Oh well, I guess there’s always the recently announced Hellboy: The Phantom Claw to look forward to right?

One thing a lot of people may not know about me is that aside from my love of films, and the World of comic books, I am a big history geek. It was always one of my favorite subjects in school, and it’s something I’ve continued to research even though I’ve been out of school for quite some time. One glimpse at my book collection and you’d know how much I enjoy the subject, and how much reading I’ve done on it.

If I had to pick one culture from history that has always fascinated me the most it would definitely be the Greeks. If you think about it, today’s comic book heroes take a lot from the heroes of ancient Greece. Superman would be like Hercules who was granted the power from the Gods. Batman would be like Odysseus who was known for his guile and resourcefulness. Even The Flash’s roots stem from Hermes the ancient messenger of the Gods, and do I even need to point out the similarities between Wonder Woman?

As fantastic and majestic as their mythology is, it’s actually the Greek’s real history that has always fascinated me the most. Tales of Athena, and Hector, and Achilies have always appealed to me in part due to their larger than life scale, and romantic overtones. However one historical Greek event has always stood out above the rest as my favorite tale of all time; The battle of Thermopylae in 480 B.C.

Why has this particular event stood out for me above the rest? Because it’s the very definition of the word epic.

About 6 years ago I can remember reading Frank Miller’s series 300 which was inspired by that very event, and thinking how cool it was that history and comic books could mesh together so well. I’m not sure if it’s the joining of the two, or Miller’s way of storytelling that had me instantly hooked, but either way I couldn’t get enough. In the tale King Leonidas (which means “lion’s son") defies the very laws he’s sword to uphold, and engages the Persian army of Emperor Xerxes with 300 of Sparta’s finest and bravest soldiers in one of the most brutal and epic battles in history.

Although Frank Miller’s series isn’t 100% based on fact, it does draw enough from history to warrant the “inspired by a true story” title we see on so many films today. For those of you that have seen the 1962 classic The 300 Spartans (the very film that inspired Miller to write 300 36 years later) you’ll notice the obvious differences between that and the film in question....and I’m not talking about the visual FX either.

Naturally in trying to incorporate the story of Thermopylae into a graphic novel, the writer must create certain elements of fiction, and exaggerate on others, and keep certain things factual which is exactly what makes this film so great. Right off the bat the mood of the film is set as we’re introduced to Leonidas before he becomes king; taking part in a ritual that will make him part of the legendary “warrior society” of Sparta. Once he becomes king, it’s made obvious very quickly that Leonidas is a no BS kind of guy, and the men of the Spartan army would follow him even if it meant their demise...this becomes a major point of the film throughout it’s 1hr 56min runtime.

The battle scenes in the film are worth the price of admission alone. While they’re not overdone and drawn out like in some movies (Troy comes to mind), they last just long enough to reinforce the fact that the Spartan army’s knowledge of combat, and of their surrounding terrain set them apart from any other army in the World. I’ve heard some people say that the scenes were “too brutal”, and to be honest I couldn’t disagree more. Sure they’re brutal, but no more so than what you’d see in films like Gladiator or even the previously mentioned Troy. The difference between the battle scenes in 300 and these films is that these scenes are very stylized scenes, complete with slo-mo (eat your heart out Matrix trilogy) camera work and digital blood splatter FX.....they aren’t brutal just for the sake of being brutal, they serve a purpose to the film and it’s overall tone.

One aspect of the film that I need to point out is the dialogue. Seriously, this film has some of the most well written dialogue I’ve heard in a long time. I mean with lines like "Enjoy your breakfast, for tonight we dine in hell!" or even king Leonidas’ thundering delivery of the word “Spartans!” throughout the film, I couldn’t help but get chills. The individual lines each character has, as well as the banter between opposing sides is simply fantastic.

Snyder is to be commended on his choice of actors, as he doesn’t rely on your typical Hollywood big names to carry the film. Instead he assembles a wide range of actors and actresses from all different backgrounds to recreate the world of ancient Sparta. Scottish-born Gerard Butler (Phantom of the Opera) gives a commanding performance as King Leonidas, and surely secures his place as a top level star in Hollywood. Brazilian-born actor Rodrigo Santoro (LOST) gives a chilling performance as Emperor Xerxes, and British actress Lena Headey makes her minimal screen time memorable as Leonidas’ wife and the Queen of Sparta.

Honesty, what can I say about this film that hasn’t already been said by the countless critics that have given it glowing reviews, or by the $70 million it made in it’s opening weekend? Halfway thru the film I already knew in my mind I wanted to see it again. The stunning visual FX are what most people are drawn to initially, but it’s the story and the solid performances by the film’s cast that will leave a lasting impression on you as you exit the theater.

Complete with amazing battle scenes, incredible acting, a strong story, and the most stunning visual FX I’ve seen to date, 300 is truly the first great film of 2007, and sets the new standard for storytelling. This movie is as close to a moving comic book as you’ve ever seen, and I couldn’t have loved it more. The women will come to see the chiseled physiques of the Spartan warriors, and the men will come for everything else...it really has something for everyone.

If you’re anything like me you’ll walk out of the movie with three things on your mind:

1) I need to go to the gym, NOW.

2) I feel like more of a man for simply having watched the movie.

3) If there is a God in Heaven, director Zack Snyder will be hired to direct the impending live action version of the God of War video game from whatever studio is smart enough to pick up the film rights first.....this is a long shot, but I can dream can’t I?

In a nutshell, I liked it....I really, really liked it.

Brian Russel vs. Tom East
Brian and Russel started off the night with a bang. They rush together after the bell in the first round and Tom gets the takedown and lands on top in half guard. Brian seems to be coping well from underneath by tying up Tom's arms. Tom slips to half guard and starts to throw nasty knees to the liver that we can hear on press row. He then transitions to some nasty hammer fists and continues the GNP forcing Brian to tap out due to strikes. The crowd roars and Tom stands in triumph. You can tell he is the home town boy.
Tom East wins by tap out due to strikes.

Sonny Neilson vs. Armondo Valadez
Round one dings and Armando comes in swinging. Sonny wisely ties him up and pushes him towards the cage. Armando reverses the position and throws Sonny with a hip throw. Sonny goes for the armbar and Armando escapes and they both get back up. Armando gets a single leg trip off the very next clinch. Sonny again goes for a high guard and an arm bar but armondo pulls a houdini and spins into the move to free the arm. The crowd roars at this point and Armondo then stuffs Sonny against the cage and starts to throw huge overhands. Armando then tries a guillotine and gets swept. Sonny then delivers a series of short elbows causing Armondo to turn. Sonny then jumps on Armondo's back and gets hooks and goes for the rear naked choke but Armondo is saved by the bell.

Armando complains about his arm in between rounds but he shrugs it off as the bell rings. Round two starts with Armando throwing haymakers. He is visibly tired but he manages to throw a spinning hammerfist that connects nicely. The crowd roars again but Sonny jumps in and gets the clinch. He pushes Armando against the fence and they trade knees but the worst knee of all is one delivered by Sonny that causes Valadez to immediately drop and grab his side in pain. You could hear the crunch and all the press winced to the sound.
Sonny Neilson wins by KO

Justin Wren vs Justin Howard
Justin Wren walks to the ring and the crowd raises to its feet and roars. You can definitely tell that he is from Dallas and the crowd favorite. Round one starts with Wren jumping out the gates swinging. He secures a clinch and throws a knee that we can hear all the way to press row. Howard answers with a leg kick and a knee to the head. He continues to throw leg kicks to the lead leg and you can tell that they are taking their toll. Wren scores a good overhand but Howards counter punching well. Wren secures another clinch and throws a nasty knee to the face yet again. Both break and continue to circle, having exhausted themselves in this first round.

Round two starts and Wren goes for the shoot but Howard stuff it and counters with a good left-right. Wren pushes Howard to the cage and delivers some more knees. Wren drops and finally scores the double take down. The crowd surges to its feet and roars. Wren passes and gets mount and starts to throw some nasty bombs forcing the referee to step in and call the match. Wren wins by TKO due to referee stoppage.

Anthony Njokuani vs. Kenneth Rosfort
Anthony struts into the ring and the crowd cheers because he is from Dallas also. You can tell by the way he stands that he is a traditional Muy Thai fighter. Round one starts and they both rush to the clinch. Kenneth gets tie up. They both start throwing knees but Anthony swims in and gets a traditional Muy Thai hold with his elbows tucked in tightly. They trade knees for about a minute but Anthony gets the upper hand because his are cleaner and forces Kenneth to break the clinch. Anthony throws a left kick to the head and a right hand that lands flush on Kenneth's chin and makes Rosfort fall face flat on the mat unconscious.
Anthony Njokuani wins by KO first round

Eric Schambari vs Christian Smith
Eric struts into the ring. Christian looks a little nervous and Eric looks focused and just plain scary. The press agent next to me leans over and whispers that he tried to get a match done with Eric vs. his friend and is glad that it didn't go through because Eric is "no joke". Round one starts and Eric stalks Christian. Smith throws a laser left and draws first blood. Eric shoots in and goes for the takedown but misses. Eventually he gets in and gets a single and the takedown. Smith scrambles and Eric only gets half guard. Eric then tries for an arm triangle but is unsuccessful because Christian holds his arm and pushes it way from his neck. Eric eventually gives up the arm triange and Smith scrambles but Eric gets full mount. Smith bucks him but falls back into the arm triangle and eventually the referee is forced to step in.
Eric Schambari wins by arm triangle

Damien Stelly vs. Mike Sheppard
The shortest fight of the night was a bit of a yawner. Round one starts and Damien immediately shoots in and gets side mount. He presses Mike against the pole and isolates the opposite limb applying a key lock and forcing Mike to tap out.
Damien wins by Key Lock

Jason Maxwell vs Yuki Inoue
Round one starts and Yuki starts the fight out with a kick. Jason answers with one of his own. Jason shoots in but Yuki reverses and gets the takedown off a single leg trip. Jason uses the cage to get back up and both start throwing knees. Jason gets a takedown off a hip throw and Yuki shunts to the side going for a kimura. Jason opens up with some elbows but Yuki won't let go of the arm even though it is tuck underneath Jason's leg. Yuki gets up and slams Jason against the fence. Jason secures the take down and falls into guard. Jason then gets back off a scramble but Yuki blocks the hooks with his legs. Both eventually get back up and start to throw. Yuki once again gets the leg trip and Jason tries a guillotine but the bell rings.

Round two starts and both throw down. Yuki at this points starts to dominate the match by repeatedly taking down Jason at will. Jason gets up and manages a hip throw but when he lunges in, Yuki catches his hips with both his feet and lifts him off the ground. They both get up and Jason gets a nice uppercut but over-commits and Yuki once again takes him down. Yuki then dominates the ground game by controlling Jasons every move.

Round three starts with Jason taking down Yuki but they scramble and both get back up. Yuki throws some sloppy punches that sets up a leg trip buy Yuki can't seem to pass guard or really GNP but Jason is doing nothing but defending. The round ends with Jason on his back.
Yukie Inoue wins by split decision

Alex Andrade vs. Klas Akesson
Alex Andrade enters the ring with the crowd cheering wildly. He is yet another Dallas native on home turf. Round one starts with Alex coming out swinging. They lock up and both throw knees with Alex pushing Klas against the fence. Alex sinks a guillotine but can't get it. He tries again and is unsuccessful again. Alex then works some body shots against the cage but they become very inactive and the ref has to break them up and re-start. Alex looks tired but keeps leaning up against Klas after rushing in again. They break and Klas gets a nice straight right before the bell.

Round two starts and Alex once again presses Klas up against the cage. Alex gets a double leg takedown and stuffs Klas in the corner. Alex then lands some nice hammerfists. They both eventually get back up and Alex lands a straight right that knocks Klas out on his feet and causes him to turn away. The ref tries to jump in but Klas turns back in to Alex and meets another left-right combo that knocks him down. The ref jump into the middle as Klas and Alex start to swing on the ground and peels Alex off Klas. Klas gets up protesting to the referee and slams his mouthpiece down in frustration.
Alex wins by KO

Carlos Prater vs. Anthony Lapsley
This fight can be defined as the ground fight of the night. Words really can't descibe the depths of the skill shown but its worth trying. There wasn't much up-top work but each were constantly trying for submissions when in guard instead of settling for defense and utilizing position changes and throws to better their causes.

Round one starts with Anthony throwing punches but Carlos reverses the charge and presses him against the cage. Anthony then scores a loud foot stomp while tied up on the cage. Carlos throws some quick knees and Anthony goes for a single leg. Carlos gets the inside leg trip and falls to side mount. They both eventually get back up and clinch again. Carlos goes for a flying Guillotine and Anthony weathers through the weight on his neck. Anthony reverses and stuffs Carlos with some GNP from on top. Anthony gets thrown off and gets Carlos back. Carlos escapes and is then subsequently mounted. Carlos is now bleeding over the left eye from some viscious GNP that happened while mounted. Carlos rolls away from the hits and gives up his back. Carlos tries to roll back and can't. Anthony gets too nigh and Carlos does a shoulder throw to reverse the position.

Round two has Anthony advancing but Carlos counters successfully. Both go down and Carlos is side mounted. Carlos pushes back to half and goes for an armbar. Anthony opens up with some steller over hands. Carlos twists and goes for a heel hook but can't finish it. Both stand up and struggle against the fence clinched. Carlos gets a double leg take down and gets side mount. Carlos advances to mount and tries for an arm triangle but can't finish it before the bell rings.

Round three has Anthony securing the take down and getting Carlos back. Carlos tries for a heel hook but can't hold and falls back into guard. Anthony goes for an arm bar and misses. Lapsley then inches up his guard and tries for a triangle unsuccessfully. Carlos continues to stuff Anthony in the corner and GNP him. Carlos passes to side mount and forces Anthony to roll away from him. Prater then opens up with some nasty knees to the kidneys that reverberate all the way to press row. Anthony then rolls back because the knees are taking their toll. Anthony is grinning as he reverses his position and ends up on top. He throws some short hammers to finish out the round.
Carlos Prater wins a close decision 29-28

Pedro Rizzo vs. Justin Eilers
Pedro is back to his old self. He constantly stalked Justin all match instead of settling for counters. Both were bloody and beaten by the end and it would have turned my stomach to see five rounds. Thank goodness it was only three.

Round one starts with the two heavyweights circling. Justin is laser precise with his kicks and rights. He bobs in for a body shot and follows with a nasty right that bounces off Pedro's face. Pedro counters with a right that just misses. Both then proceed to trade leather and Justin get caughts with a nasty overhand and goes down to the canvas. Eilers recovers just in time to pull guard. Rizzo then throws some huge elbows from up-top while Justin tries desperately to cover. Rizzo goes to half guard and continues to rain down some nasty punches causing Justin to give up his back and roll to a fetal position. Pedro leans on Justins back and seems content to throw hooks to the side of Justin's head. Eilers comes out of his turtle shell every few seconds to throw some elbows over his shoulder at Pedro and they seem to be connecting with frequency. Both sets of blows are loud. After a little bit, Justin lunges up from his turtle position and reverses away from the cage. Both trade blows while pressed against the cage. Pedro throws a half-hearted foot stomp and the bell rings.

Round two has Justin jumping in and landing a straight that sends sweat and water flying off Pedro's head. Pedro then throws a straight and Justin counters. They then trade back and forth with Pedro stalking Eilers around the ring. Justin eventually lunges in and lands a glancing uppercut that seems to stop at the rafters. Pedro immediately answers with a 1-2 while Justin kicks as a counter. Pedro continues to rain in power shots. Justin starts by getting off first but then flags as Pedro continues to apply some heavy leather. Pedro has blood streaming from the bridge of his nose and a mouse under one of his eyes. Justin is cut over his left eye. Pedro lands a nasty knee that has Eilers in trouble. Pedro then goes to work on the front leg of Justin and throws kick after thunking kick and causes Justin to go backwards. Pedro then fakes to the front leg and goes to the head causing sweat to fly off Justin's face. Eilers is rocked but the bell rings and saves him.

Round three starts with both feeling each other out with 1-2 combos. Both are bleeding from the nose and are torn and beaten. Justin finally uses some leading leg kicks and follows up with another upper cut. Pedro continues to work Justin's front leg and is causing visible swelling. Justin lands a hard 1-2 that pushes Pedro back against the cage. Both trade body shots. Pedro goes for the double leg and rains down massive over hands on Justin. Both eventually get up and trade straight right as the bell rings.
Pedro wins unanimous decision

Guy Metzger did a really good job with the matchmaking and if their fights follow his lead, then the "Art of War" should do good for itself. Plan to see another event in May in Austin, Texas.

I’ve been a fan of actor/comedian Sacha Baron Cohen ever since his Ali G character first graced American audiences with his Da Ali G Show that premiered on HBO in early 2003. When the character of Borat first appeared on the show I wasn’t really sure what to make of him. Here you’ve got a guy from a third World country doing interviews in an attempt to gather information to bring back to his country. While my initial reaction to the Borat character was confusion, it didn’t take very long for him to grow on me, and for me to become the fan I am today.

Although I didn’t get to review this film when it was released in theaters back in November, I am going to attempt to kill two birds with one stone by reviewing the film and the DVD at the same time.

In Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan (try saying that three times fast, or even once for that matter) comedian Sacha Baron Cohen brings his beloved character to the big screen in a mocumentary style that will have you scratching your head, and debating with your friends on which segments were real, and which were scripted. The plot of the film is simple:

Kazakhi TV reporter Borat Sagdiyev has been ordered by the Ministry of Information to come to American, err the “U.S and A” in an attempt to learn more about our country so he can take the information he’s collected back to Kazakhstan in the hopes that his country can become a better place. During his travels with producer Azamat Bagatov, Borat falls in love with actress Pamela Anderson, and it’s not long before his quest for information turns into a quest for Pamela’s hand in marriage. Or at least some “sexytime” with the actress.

Honestly, what can I say about this movie that hasn’t already been said by countless critics since the film was initially released last November? Being a fan of the character aside, I seriously think comedian Sacha Baron Cohen quite possibly could’ve made the funniest movie of all time. Now, while I may think this movie is hysterical, I can see where some people would be turned off to the film’s main character and overall humor.

What I like most about this film is that even though it is supposed to be a comedy, it really does show you different aspects of our wonderful country, some that made me feel proud to be an American (like the people that accepted Borat and tried to befriend him), and others that had me shaking my head in disbelief (like some of the people on the NY subway that wanted to punch Borat for saying “hi"). The character of Borat, is at it’s core a charming character. Sure he gets on people’s nerves, but that’s done intentionally thru the character’s ignorance of American culture. Throughout the film you’ll encounter numerous people that either befriend Borat and help him learn new things out our country, or literally try to cause him physical harm.

I’ve heard a lot of people say that they don’t like the character because he’s “crude,” however when you think about it he’s only “crude” because his way of life is different than ours, and he says and does things that we here in America aren’t accustomed too....and that’s ok. Yes I realize Cohen tries purposely to see how far he can push people, but if you think about it certain people are just intolerant period, it doesn’t matter who you are or where you come from.

During the course of the film we’re taken around the country as Borat does everything he can in an attempt to learn more about America. Personally, I couldn’t stop laughing from when the film started to when the film ended. In just about every scene. Whether he’s taking his DMV driving test, trying to make new friends on a NY city subway (bad idea), or getting taught how to act more “ghetto” (which leads to his famous "what’s up with it vanilla face?" line) I couldn’t find one point in the film that didn’t make me laugh out loud.

This film is definitely not for everyone, as I’ve heard a few people say they either walked out of the movie, or got extremely offended when Borat discovers Azamat “browsing thru” (I use the word “browsing” extremely lightly) his coveted Baywatch magazine and a naked wrestling match between two men ensues throughout a four star hotel. At one point the two even interrupt a Mortgage banquet with their nude wrestling. Personally I thought it was hysterical, but I can see where some people might get turned off to the movie by it.

In order to truly enjoy the character of Borat, and his big screen adventure, one must first understand that the point of this character is to observe American culture thru the eyes of someone who is completely, and utterly alien to all of our customs and our very way of life.

The DVD features extras such as deleted scenes that were apparently cut out by the Kazakhi Ministry of Information (they were edited for length), subtitles, and a brief featurette detailing the marketing of the film, and the many appearances Borat made while promoting his “movie film.” One memorable appearance came when Borat was a guest on the Tonight Show along with Martha Stewart. Stewart was supposed to instruct Borat on how to make a bed properly, however Borat had other plans and in no time climbed in the bed and stripped off his underwear hoping for some “sexytime” with the “Domestic Diva.” Another favorite extra of mine included Borat’s version of Baywatch that he seemingly developed for Kazakhi TV (it made him the fourth most popular person in the country) entitled “Sexydrownwatch.” While I won’t give too much away, I will tell you that I had to watch this scene over and over. It literally brought me to tears from laughing so hard.

Personally, I was hoping for a bit more in the way of bonus material on the DVD, but I guess I can live with what I got since at least the film is present, and knowing how DVD’s are they’ll probably release a super deluxe Kazakhi edition before the year’s over.

While I wouldn’t recommend Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan to anyone under the age of 16, I would highly recommend it to those people out there that aren’t easily offended, and can appreciate a brilliant comedic mind. Let’s face it, whether you like him or not, the character of Borat has become a part of American pop culture, and that in itself is a victory for everyone.

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan is currently available on DVD, and retails for $19.99

For those of you that have been with us (and by us I mean Komikazee) for awhile, hopefully you’ll remember my review on Casino Royale that was posted back in November. Basically I admitted that I was completely wrong about actor Daniel Craig in the role of James Bond. When he was first cast I was one of the many people who was quick to say "who is this guy, and where’s Pierce??" and after the film came out I was also one of the many people left eating a big plate of crow. Not only does Craig create the kind of Bond we’ve never seen before (this guy doesn’t need gadgets to take you out, trust me), I personally think he’s the best actor to ever put on the tux and utter the words "Bond, James Bond."

Needless to say, I REALLY enjoyed the film.

So while I’m not going to review the film again (you can read the initial review here I did want the opportunity to review the DVD once it arrived in stores in the hopes that those of you that didn’t see it in theaters will pick it up and enjoy it at home.

Casino Royale comes to DVD in a two-disc collection that packs not only the 144min film, but some really cool interactive menus, and a collection of extras such as the Chris Cornell music video for the film’s theme "You know my name," (awesome song by the way), subtitles, two documentaires and a featurette detailing everything from Craig’s initial casting, to the stunts involved in the film, to a look at the Bond girls past and present.

The first documentary is "Becoming Bond" which details the reasoning for turning Flemming’s first book Casino Royale into a feature film (we’re ignoring the spoof film from the 60’s) that would basically restart the franchise and tell the origin of James Bond and how he came to acquire his legendary double 0 status. The documentary goes on to explain that since the point of making Casino Royale was to show James Bond at the beginning of his career, it meant current Bond Pierce Brosnan could no longer play the part and a new, younger actor would have to step in as 007. The documentary goes on to cover the year plus search for the new actor, and even gives names of some well known actors such as Clive Owen, Julian McMahon, and Hugh Jackman that were once considered for the part. Ultimately we all know who wound up getting the role, and the featurette also details some of the initial reaction that Craig received from the media upon his casting. Without going too far into detail I can say that Craig received a pretty brutual “welcome” from fans all around the World, but in the end he proved us all wrong by creating the most believable Bond to date.

"James Bond: For Real" is a second documentary that details the realistic approach the film took with it’s story, fight scenes, gadgets (or lack thereof), and stunts. This was a very interesting documentary to watch because it really helped reinforce that this is a new kind of Bond flick, and it’s trying to place the character back into the World of reality since his last few films had him relying on some pretty outlandish plots and gadgets. We’re taken to the different locations used during the film, and even shown clips of actor Daniel Craig training for the many fight scenes in the film....another aspect the film’s director Martin Campbell was adament about making as real as possible.

"Bond Girls are Forever" is more of a short featurette on the various actresses that have played the countless Bond girls in the franchise’s 21 film history. While I wasn’t particularly keen on this featurette, it was vaguely interesting to see the different Bond girls throughout the history of the franchise, and how each of them look back on their characters and what they stood for years after making the film. I will say that everyone’s favorite Bond girl Pussy Galore is still alive and kicking, and even says that she continues to get fan mail from people asking her to sign her response as Pussy Galore....there’s some odd people out there.

Overall Casino Royale is a great two-disc collection that is a must for any Bond fan, or any fan of good films in general. While I would’ve liked to see some more footage on the making of the film, the set does give us just enough without making it overkill which is ok with me. Personally, I found the "Becoming Bond" documentary to be the most interesting, but I’m sure there are those of you out there that will find an equal amount of interest in the others.

Casino Royale two-disc special edition will be released on March 13th, and retail for $19.99

Grand Theft Auto, undisputably a fantastic game. Saints Row, in my opinion a flop. The new kid on the block is nipping at the heels of GTA to become the new sandbox king.

The setting for crackdown is set of islands in the middle of nowhere. These islands are occupied by the Agency (the police) and 3 well put together gangs. There’s not that much to the story, basically kill the gang Kingpins after taking out a few of their Generals. The more Generals and key players of a gang you kill, the better chance you’ll have to beat the Kingpin. Most of your time will be spent looking for the different gang strongholds. If you get close to one it will show up as a permanent market on your map. If you notice you’re getting the snot kicked out of you within the first couple seconds of storming a compound, back off and go for something easier. After beating one of the other gang members, this one will become easier to mow over after that. After Los Muertos you take on The Volk and the Shai-Gen which increase the games difficulty. But there’s nothing stopping you from doing taking them out out of order, other than your lack of strength that is.

Don’t forget to get all the Re-Supply points during your adventure. Re-Supply points are marked by a big orange “skylight” to show you where they are (they will also show up on your map as you see them). These are the Crackdown’s version of both a reload and spawn point. If you find yourself sleeping with the fishes, you can spawn at any of the Re-Supply points that you have taken over. If you take out one of the kingpins make it a priority to grab their weapon, which is usually a heavy piece of weaponry, and bring it back to a supply point to secure it in your inventory for the rest of the game.

As your jumping from building to building, you are also tasked with collecting Agility Orbs. Glowing green pickups that increase your speed and jumping heighth. The harder it is to get to these orbs, the more they’ll increase your agility rating. This activity seems to take up the most time. You can spend many hours searching the rooftops for these powerups. Hidden Orbs are also included in your search. These are orbs that fill each of the 5 ability meters. Agility, Explosives, Strength, Driving and Firearms. The other abilities pretty much increase on their own. For example, if you kill a man by kicking him your strength rating will increase and so on. A 5 star rating is the goal for each of your abilities, some being easier to level up than others. But if you stay at it, a bevy of Achievement points are on their way =).

The visuals in Crackdown are pretty unique to it’s genre. Cell shaded characters on top of a cartoon city. The explosives are the most eye catching here. It’s kind of a combination cartoon and realistic render of the smoke and chaos flying from the explosion. Given the sheer size of the environment with no load times, this game is very pleasing to the eyes.

The most notable structure in the entire game is the Agency HQ. The talles most prominent building in the land. If you can make it to the top of this Mega Skyscraper you will be awarded with the best view of the entire map and 10 brand new Achievement points. After you’ve taken in the view, go ahead and leap off the top and land in the water (otherwise you’ll certainly die) to get even more Achievement points headed your way.

The story won’t keep you hooked, but the gameplay and abilities you have are definitely fun to play around with. Don’t stress yourself out too much on collecting all the orbs, you’ll go crazy trying to. But get your agility maxed out and that’s when you have all the fun. Definitely worth a buy if you’re into sandbox games.

Bamf here rematerializing from the void..

At just over two and a half hours long the experience of watching Zodiac can be compared to how the investigators felt when they looked at a calendar and saw that it was the 80s and they were still looking for a killer from the 60’s.  That in its self is not surprising, we know murders go unsolved and create ready content for Court TV and CBS mellow dramas.  The Zodiac killer made his mark by adding some flair to his alleged crimes and if youtube had existed then, maybe he just would have been another guy making shorts with shadow puppets.  Exposure is what this killer wanted, exposure derived from fear.  David Fincher returns to the serial killer director chair with his anti-thesis of Seven showing how you don’t need to kill someone to destroy them.

I found the pacing served well to the story, and when a character is lost for 20 minutes you quickly understand why.  This is not the crime story that leads from one “By George, we got it!” moment to the next until the villain is killed or captured.  It paints a very different picture of criminal procedures across one states county lines.  All involved from Avery (Robert Downey Jr.) the legacy-seeking reporter, the beaten Inspector Toschi (Ruffalo), and haughty Dr. Belli (Cox) seem to want the satisfaction of closing the case but it really is just static in the background of their every day lives.  No one feels like they are or ever will be a victim, like gawkers on the freeway passing up some gruesome site of a Semi truck colliding with a Mini Cooper.  They are only viewers to events and have to disconnect if only to save some sanity.

And who could blame them?  With no solid evidence, absence of known information and when your best suspect is allowed to walk what do you do?  You walk away, dejected, but its not your problem anymore.  Then someone else picks up the cold lead and tries their hand at it but it turns out to be a Rubix cube with not one repeating color.  When Greysmith (Gyllenhal) thinks he might have the answer to his obsession of who Zodiac is and goes out to investigate it nears comedy.  Although he wants so badly to end this riddle, solve this puzzle, crack this cipher when he comes face to face with who he realizes might be the killer the only action he can take is run.  It stops being a game when his personal survival is at stake and retreating to the comfort of dry pages and wet fact-finding missions becomes the safest course of action.

Chloe Sevigny, world class nag. Love her.
I really want to see Mark Ruffalo as a wild eyed, big hair scientist like Doc Brown from Back to the Future.  He really shines in this with his somber, “ya this is my job, but damn it I need closure.”

And really that’s what Finchers Zodiac is all about.  Its that song you cant stop thinking about because you don’t know the name, or the crossword clue that has your inner brain twisting from the tease.  You come to a point when if someone gives you a five-letter word and it fits, you’ll take it, and walk away. Just someone give me the answer please.  In contrast, what the film is definitely not like would be putting a pair of jeans on and finding a 20 in the pocket. That’s a 20-dollar bill, not sack full of contraband (ahem!).

The runtime may get to you, and maybe some bigger score movements would have helped with the fatigue of seeing scene after scene with endless date cards. For the mystery seeking Sherlock in you it will satisfy and illuminate.  You’re on the hunt, following the twists of fate, jurisdiction calamities and a soft answer to a hard question.  Was the Zodiac ever stopped?

{about}

A couple notes before we go into the analysis of the different matches. Arlovski wins the “Arm Candy of the Night” award with the stunning brunette beauty that he brought to the fights. His cashmere shirt leaves much to be desired though. The night would not have been complete without the drunk old lady at the bar yelling over and over again at the top of her lungs during the Couture fight, “C’mon OLD MAN!!! C’mon OLD MAN!!!”. Anderson Silva is a class act. After the Rich Franklin fight, he came up and was very gracious, congratulating Rich on the win. They even showed him before the match predicting the win for Rich. Class between competitors like that is what sets this sport apart from other venues like boxing, etc. Anyways, lets return to the matches at hand.

Renato “Babalu” Sobral vs. Jason Lambert
The night started out with Babalu and Jason Lambert. Jason is 5’10” and at 205 he appears like a walking fireplug. Sobral on the other hand looks like the prototypical fighter with his 6’1” height and tattooed arms. Both look like they are ready to fight.

Round one begins with Babalu swinging for the fences right from the start, lands some low kicks, and secures a takedown. Renato stays in the drivers seat with some hits from up top and eventually secures Lambert’s back. Jason defends the rear naked choke for a bit and eventually reverses the situation. They then stand after awhile and start to trade shots. Jason Lambert appears to be winning the stand up game by landing a few well placed hooks that land before Renato can land his shots. Renato wins round one by virtue of the initial takedown.

Round two starts with a flurry of combos from Jason Lambert that results in a great takedown. Jason is very active from in the guard and continually works body, body, head. Eventually they get stood up and Renato goes for a lazy knee where his hands drop and Jason immediately throws a nasty left hook that knocks Sobral to the canvas and out. Jason Lambert wins by KO.

Matt Hughes vs. Chris Lytle
Chris comes out looking a little nervous, Matt comes out to his customary country music. The crowd roars as Matt enters the ring and is clearly the crowd favorite.

Round one starts and Chris throws a flurry of combos in a fit of nervous energy. He then attempts to jump guard and throw a guillotine that looks pretty tight but Matt eventually slips out. Matt secures side mount and starts to stifle Chris working for the crucifix but Lytle doesn’t give it to him and uses his arm to cover the side that Matt is working. Chris is very limber and gets a weird leg lock on Matt’s head by working his legs up around Matt’s neck from behind. The round ends with Matt trying for an armbar. Matt wins round one by dominating Chris

Round two has Matt getting a double leg on Chris and taking him to the mat again. Matt continues to dominate from side mount with him eventually securing a full mount against the cage near the end of the round. Chris eventually engineers a slick reversal by leveraging the cage with his feet and flipping over his head with him landing on top for a brief time. Matt clearly dominated the second round.

Round three is much of the same. Matt secures the takedown and gets side mount and then proceeds to hold his opponent down. He tries to isolate the opposite arm a couple times but is unsuccessful. The crowd goes impatient and Matt then goes for knee on belly in an effort to pass and starts to punch Chris on the ground in an effort to loosen him up but is unsuccessful. The round ends with Matt Hughes the obvious winner.

Matt Hughes wins by decision 30-27 x 3.

Rich Franklin vs. Jason “The Athlete” MacDonald
Rich Franklin comes out with a huge pre-existing mouse underneath his eye but looks very collected. Jason comes out his usual self, a little nervous, but very energetic and happy to be in the Octagon.

Round one starts with the strategies becoming very obvious. Rich wants to keep the fight standing and Jason wants to take it to the ground. Every time Rich throws a punch Jason starts to shoot in instead of standing and trading. Jason does secure a single leg but Rich utilizes his balance to keep him up on his feet and eventually escapes. Rich then throws some good connecting hits but Jason doesn’t stay engaged. Rich gets some knees in and eventually throws him against the cage. They go to the ground and Rich employs some GNP from up top. MacDonald gets up and eventually secures a single leg that takes Rich down. Rich reverses but the round ends. Rich wins the first round.

Round two starts with a single leg try by Jason MacDonald. He then goes for a flying triangle but is unsuccessful. Rich lands in side control and utilizes the knees to the kidney to loosen Jason up. Rich then mounts with Jason squirming underneath. Jason is forced by blows to turn away and Rich secures the back. Rich then just lets fly some awesome left right combos to Jason’s head. One particular nasty left leaks through as Jason tried to roll away. The bell rings with Herb Dean stepping in and when Jason gets up and goes to the corner, his coach then throws in the towel.

Rich Franklin wins by TKO due to strikes.

Martin Kampmann vs. Drew McFedries
There is some ambient time to kill due to two short matches to they cut to a preliminary match. It isn’t quite as obvious though because a majority of the Ohio crowd is already in their seats watching the fights (which doesn’t happen in Las Vegas).

Round one begins with Drew throwing bombs. He gets some nasty combos off that rock Martin’s world and forces him to clinch. Martin then performs a hip throw from the clinch and lands in side mount. Drew is in trouble. Martin works the side mount and rotates 180 degrees to the opposite side. Drew doesn’t defend so Martin tucks his head underneath Drew’s arm and immediately hops across McFedries body securing the arm triangle. Martin then applies the pressure by rotating his body out clockwise which forces Drew’s own arm against the side of his head and cuts off all the oxygen to Drew’s brain and renders him unconscious. Martin Kampmann wins by Submission due to an arm triangle.

Tim Silvia vs. Randy Couture
There isn’t much to write about this match. Randy comes out looking supremely confident, Silvia comes out his normal self but refuses to look over at Randy except for once.

Round ones starts with a flurry that has Randy landing a nasty right that knocks Silvia to the ground. Randy immediately pounces and then proceeds to work Tim over. He literally holds him there the whole time working GNP for the whole round. Randy wins the round by domination.

Round two starts and Randy gets a single. Silvia’s base isn’t wide enough and Randy takes him to the ground. Randy again applies the GNP from the guard and half guard and does that all round with very little reply from Silvia.

Round three Randy changes tactics and stands with Silvia, he lands some nasty lefts and rights but refuses to play with Tim’s jabs. He uses constant head movement to throw Tim off and doesn’t allow the jab to land. Tim is afraid to throw any kicks because of the takedowns that Randy has been doing all match. Randy wins the round again. Tim looks overmatched and defeated.

Round four starts and Randy gets a great takedown from a clinch by utilizing an inside leg trip. Tim eventually gets up after eating some shots but Randy immediately goes for a double leg and is successful. He gets side mount. He eventually uses strikes to move to full mount position but Tim gets out. Randy wins the fourth round by totally dominating Tim.

Round five is much of the same. Randy is scoring takedowns at will. The GNP that he has been applying is starting to become evident on Tim’s face and he has a huge subdermal hematoma above his left eye. Tim is weary and gives up full mount to Randy and allows him to rain down blows. Randy wins round five in a dominating fashion yet again.

Randy wins by decision 50-45 x 3 and is the new Heavyweight UFC champion at 43 years old!!!

Last Saturday night should be deemed “The Night of Upsets”. PRIDE had set up a storyline of Gaijin vs. Japanese where they expected all their brightest and greatest to own lots of American and ex-UFC stars. Things didn’t go as planned.

Wanderlei Silva vs. Dan Henderson
This match was a slugfest. It went back and forth with Dan “Hollywood” Henderson actually owning Vandy after the first round. Wanderlei did not look as crisp and was constantly moving backwards as Dan Henderson pushed the pace and controlled the arena. Eventually Dan Henderson landed a spinning hammerfist in the third round that send Silva reeling. This move didn’t finish Vandy off but it was the signal of the end. Shortly thereafter, Dan came in with a straight right and a left hook that knocked the champion out. Dan wins in the third round by KO and is both the 185 and 205 lb. PRIDE champion.

Sokoudjou vs. Antonio Rougerio Nogueira
The upset of the night happened in this match. Sokoudjou is brand new to the sport and actually interviewed with Komikazee first. He was expected to lie down for Nogueira but Sokoudjou did nothing of the sort. He came out with some really strong lower leg kicks that caused Antonio to drop his guard slighly and left the fatal opening. Sokoudjou then pounced right after one of his leg kicks with a left hook that knocked Antonio out cold. Sokoudjou wins in 28 seconds by KO

Gomi vs. Nick Diaz
This fight was billed in Japan as Gomi vs. top UFC star. It was supposed to be the start of his “raid” into the UFC lightweights. Nothing went as planned for the Japanese superstar. Nick Diaz isn’t an upper echelon UFC fighter, but he ain’t a patsy either. Nick came in with a chip on his shoulder and took it to Gomi. The first round was spectacular with punches flying from both sides. Gomi even landed a flush hit on Nick’s chin that fell him to the canvas. Unfortunately, Gomi gassed at the end of the first round and Nick took over from there. In the second round, Nick started to taunt with his upraised hands and was landing shots at will. Gomi was wobbling from exhaustion and throwing haymakers to no avail. Eventually Nick took him down and applied a gogoplata to force the tapout. Nick Diaz wins by submission in the second round.

All three of these fights were spectacular to behold. Whether they helped PRIDE out in the long-run remains to be seen. There were others on the card. For the full reviews, see this great article on Sherdog.

I remember a few months ago when the good folks at NBC sent out some DVD screeners for their new shows set to premiere in the Fall. In the set I received were shows like Heroes, 30 Rock, and a show I’d never even heard anything about called The Black Donnellys. Months later we saw both Heroes and 30 Rock go on to be ratings sensations, but it left me asking the question "What happened to The Black Donnellys?"

A few days ago I received a new DVD screener for The Black Donnellys which contained the first 5 episodes. Remembering that I had enjoyed the pilot episode when I first saw it acouple of months ago, I popped the disc into my DVD player and sat down hoping the other 4 episodes would keep me as entertained as the pilot did.

The show is created by Paul Haggis and Bobby Morasco (Crash) and centers around four irish brothers named Tommy, Kevin, Jimmy, and Sean, that despite their different chosen paths in life hold one thing to be sacred: “Family above all.” Narrated by a small time wannabe gangster named Joey “Ice Cream,” the show follows the brothers and their sudden involvement in the World of organized crime.

Now, I’m a BIG fan of movies like Goodfellas, The Godfather, Casino, etc. The World of organized crime, and the mob is something that has always interested me, so naturally I figured I could find at least something enjoyable in this show.

Before I continue, let me just say that I’ve read the less than flattering reviews the show has received. The Los Angeles Times called it “rubbish,” The New York Times says the show will make you rethink Haggis’ success with Crash, and Entertainment Weekly says the show consists of writing you can spot coming a mile away. Pretty harsh reviews if you ask me, but oh well, I mean that’s what these people get paid to do right? Not every show can be a winner, and according to these fine sources NBC would have better luck if they aired a repeat of Heroes in place of The Black Donnellys. Ouch.

Personally, I enjoyed the show. Sure it’s not on the same level as The Sopranos, but it doesn’t really try to be either. The thing with creating shows like this that air on basic TV is that you run into the problem of not being able to portray your characters as dark and gritty as you’d like. I mean in The Sopranos they have complete freedom to say and do whatever they want because they’re on HBO, but with The Black Donnellys they have to rely on something more than just throwing around the “F word” since they’re on a “family network.” This is something I’ve always had a problem with. I mean would Goodfellas really be the masterpiece it is if the characters were limited to saying “gosh” and "gee whiz"? Probably not because it would take the sense of realism away. This is 2007 and people talk a certain away. They use certain “colorful” words to spice up their vocabulary. You may not like it, but it’s a fact of life. In fact, one of my reasons for not watching the initial season of FOX’s Prison Break was because I didn’t think they could present prison life in a believable way. Oh how wrong I was.

Stay with me, I’m not just trying to use this time to advocate my belief in freedom of speech, there’s actually a point to this.

The Black Donnellys is pretty much the same thing for me. I mean how do you present the life of people who are involved in organized crime when you’ve got some pretty strict rules laid down by network censors? You rely on clever writing that’s what you do. In the pilot episode we’re introduced to our main characters: Kevin’s the gambler, Jimmy’s the hothead, Sean’s the baby of the family, and Tommy is the one always bailing his brothers out of trouble. The show tries to convey the fact that each of the brother’s have taken a different path in life, but despite their differences there is nothing they wouldn’t do for eachother.

The first episode starts off a bit slow, and has a few points that made me roll my eyes, but by the end of the episode had me nodding my head in approval wanting to watch the next episode. In the later episodes we see just how close this family really is, and how any of the four brothers would literally throw their life away (namely Tommy) for the sake of the family. We get to know a bit more about each of the characters, and learn more about the foundations of each of them as individuals and as a unit, and to be honest with you, I found these characters to be pretty interesting.

The acting is great since the show doesn’t rely on big name actors. When you see Tommy, or Kevin, or Jimmy it’s not like you’re saying “hey that’s (insert big name actor here) playing a mobster,” these actors portray their respective characters in a very convincing way even down to that sometimes hard to understand New York accent that almost every mobster seems to have.

In addition to the acting, the pilot (which was directed by Haggis) is shot beautifully in a way that really conveys the grittiness, and overall dark tone of the show. A lot of the show is shot at night, and even when the characters are in lighted areas the colors are very muted. Maybe it’s because I’m a geek and I look for these things, but the look of the show is very “moody” which is exactly what I think they were aiming for.

Overall I found The Black Donnellys to be a pretty convincing look into the World of the Irish mob. As much as I love shows like The Sopranos, it does get a bit tiring when someone comes along with a “new” look at the mob and they’re basically recycling the same characters we’ve seen time and time again, and we’re reduced to watching the same old Italian stereotypes played out for a new audience. This show doesn’t rely on stereotypes, or recycling characters depicted in every mob movie you’ve ever seen, instead it offers a fresh approach to the World of organized crime, and introduces you to characters that could conceivably be your next door neighbor (if you live in New York that is).

Needless to say, I liked it. Sure the other bigger name critics have trashed the show and called it a complete waste of time, but honestly, who are you going to trust, someone who’s been doing this for so long they’ve become desensitized to it, or your Average Joe? Then again you could always tune in and form an opinion of your own.

The Black Donnellys premiers tonight (Monday 2/26) @ 10 p.m on NBC.

In "Two of a Kind" the world of The Batman is introduced to a new character in Dr. Harleen Quinzel, a daytime talk show host who happens to have a degree in psychology (that she got online). After an incident involving an appearance by Bruce Wayne, her TV show is canceled, and Quinzel is tossed out and made a laughing stock. Sensing her vulnerability, The Joker wastes no time in grooming her as his new partner in crime, as they wreak havoc throughout the city and encounter The Batman who tries to talk Dr. Quinzel out of her new found life of crime.

Personally, I have been waiting for this episode for awhile. Since the original introduction of Harley Quinn in Batman: The Animated Series I have been a big fan of the character (I even want to name my daughter Harley if I ever have one), and hoped they’d introduce her into Batman’s latest animated incarnation at some point...I finally got my wish.

Although her origin is slightly altered (she’s now a talk show host rather than a psychologist at Arkham) the basis of Harley is still there. The biggest change I saw is in the fact that there is almost no difference in her personality when she’s Dr. Harleen Quinzel than when she’s Harley Quinn. I found this to be a bit disappointing because I always found her origin to be fascinating. Here you’ve got a brilliant psychologist who takes on The Joker as a patient. After months and months of listening to his horror stories about his childhood the doctor begins to feel pitty for him. After being beaten nearly to death and imprisoned once again at the hands of The Batman, Dr. Quinzel decides to spring The Joker and takes on the new mantle of “Harley Quinn.” I always loved seeing her downward spiral going from The Joker’s psychologist, to his almost obsessive love slave.

The episode itself is good if you can get past the new spin on Harley. For those wondering about her voice that was originally brilliantly done by Arleen Sorkin worry not as Hynden Walch (Starfire from Teen Titans) does an almost spot on job of recreating her voice for the new series. The character is almost exactly as she was in the original series (except for the above example) and of course how could we have Harley Quinn without her saying some of her classic phrases such as “puddin,” or "Mista J"? Those are all in the episode as well.

Overall "Two of a Kind" does a decent job of introducing one of my favorite characters to the world of The Batman. Harley’s new design works great, especially with the overexaggerated features such as her eyes and jester cap, and her mannerisms are spot on as the episode progresses. I’m sure some people will trash the episode because it takes a slightly new approach to the character, but keep in mind that the episode was written by Harley’s creator Paul Dini, and who better to introduce her to a new audience than the man who originally gave her life? I’m really hoping we see more of Harley in season 5.

I saw the movie which was cool. I couldn’t wait to play the game. I purposely put off playing until after I saw the movie. I know that a lot of comic book series make horrible video games but that didn’t phase me at all. Until I played through the first couple levels.

First off, the ambience in the levels I think is great. There’s always interesting actions going on in the background of the level. I thought that was a nice touch. The overall construction of the levels held nothing special. It literally walks you from room to room, battle to battle until the level ends. Not much level variety going on here.

The look of the characters look pretty basic. Maybe I’ve just gotten spoiled on next-gen graphics though. Ghost Rider himself looks better than his foes around him. The flames coming off of his skull look pretty natural and they got all of the small details in too. If you’re just walking around you can always see the chain around his shoulder, and the spikes coming out of his jacket and so on. His Chopper is pretty good looking to when it’s in motion. The flames coming off of the tires and all the metallic look of the frame come off very well.

Now as far as the gameplay in God of… I mean Ghost Rider is where this package goes really wrong. 2K games was obviously leaning toward a God of War type of fighting mechanic. With the control scheme the way it is, it does match pretty closely together. However when you swing your chain it’s not as fluid as the Blades of Chaos in the God of War series. When you throw out an attack it seems to almost stick you to the floor so you can’t lay down too great of a combo, but you can always get a few hit combo pretty easily. The camera is hardly forgiving, especially during boss battles. It’s 2007 guys, we shouldn’t be throwing out attacks toward the TV screen because the camera is looking at us head on while we’re fighting an “invisible” monster. Clicking the right thumbstick will center the camera back into position behind you, but your constantly running around and dodging so it doesn’t help for too long.

In between some levels you’ll take Ghost Rider’s chopper for a ride. This party of the game was the most fun to me. You can really sense some speed when you’re riding down the tracks toward enemies and obstacles. The enemies in this portion of the game aren’t too much of a hazard as long as you lay on the attack button. The real hazard is with the obstacles that you can jump over and slide under. At the push of a button you can lay the bike down and slide underneath a truck or sign of some sort. If you hit one of the obstacles on the course there’s no sense of penalty. You’ll go back to a checkpoint location and just try and try again. This is one part they didn’t include into the walking around levels. If you are to die, even at a boss, you go all the way back to the beginning which gets real frustrating real fast. The Chopper levels do feel like a way to break up the action in the game, but they just may be your favorite part too.

Like I said, I was really excited to finally sit down with this game. But it got way to repetitive way too fast. The attempt to mimic God of War is an utter failure. If you’re going to play this game, just give it a rent. It’s worth looking at and many people (judging by message boards) like the game. Whether it’s worth a purchase at $30 is real questionable though. If it was normal priced at $50 bucks, that answer would be a no brainer.

Personally I’ve never been a huge fan of the character Ghost Rider. I mean, I know the basics and enough to get me by incase a random conversation about the Spirit of Vengeance breaks out at a party (hey, it’s been known to happen), but otherwise my knowledge has it’s limits. Naturally when I heard a movie based on the popular Marvel character was in the works I thought it could be a interesting idea, I mean at the least it would be cool to see a flaming skull on the big screen for 90min right? Then I learned that Mark Steven Johnson had been hired to write and direct the film and I immediately thought "oh no." This is the same guy that thought it would be a good idea to cast Ben Affleck and Colin Farrel as Daredevil and Bullseye....needless to say my faith in him was less than present.

I got the chance to catch a late night showing of Ghost Rider, and when asked afterwards “what did you think” my honest reaction was "I don’t really know." Usually with films like this about characters that aren’t as big as the likes of Superman, Batman, Spider-Man, etc I tend to walk out with a feeling of uncertainty about the film. The remedy for such feelings? Why, going and seeing the movie for a second time of course.

In the Columbia Pictures film World famous motorcycle stunt rider Johnny Blaze makes a deal with the devil Mephistopheles in order to keep his father from dying of cancer. Blaze later learns that he has been tricked by Mephistopheles, and is forced to leave his childhood sweetheart Roxanne in order to protect her. Some years later Blackheart, the son of Mephistopheles enlists the help of three fallen angles called “The Hidden” to help him take over the World. Mephistopheles once again comes to Blaze and tells him it’s time for him to collect on their deal thus turning Blaze into his personal bounty hunter known as the Ghost Rider.

The beginning of the film seems a bit forced in my opinion, but that could be due to the fact that there’s a lot of backstory for Johnson to cover (check out wikipedia’s info on the character). The film tries to establish that Blaze is really looking for his father’s approval, and only wants what’s best for him which is why he enters into a deal with the devil. What gets me is that Blaze signs the deal out of an overwhelming love for his father, however we really don’t get to see that too much during the film...it’s more implied than anything.

It doesn’t take too long before we’re introduced to Blackheart and “The Hidden” and the film starts to pick up. There’s a bit more set up for Blaze before he becomes the Ghost Rider, but honestly it doesn’t seem excessive at all, actually I enjoyed getting to know the character before he transforms. Once Blaze is called upon by Mephistopheles we’re in for a treat in the form of the initial transformation which looks extremely painful, but also enjoyable in a wierd way...it really is an impressive scene.

Once Ghost Rider shows up and meets up with Blackheart & Co. it’s pretty much a no holds barred slugfest from start to finish. Each of “The Hidden” possess an elemental power which proves to be a bit tricky for Ghost Rider at first. The first meeting features some pretty cool action that, if you’re anything like me, will leave you with a smile plastered across your face and saying “wow” more than once.

The film’s strongest point comes in the form of it’s visual FX. For those of you that think you’ve seen it all based on the TV spots let me be the first to tell you that you haven’t seen anything yet. From the first full transformation, to the battle with the demons, to the scene with Ghost Rider riding up the side of the building the film is at very least a visual pleaser. Another thing I’d like to point out is the amount of attention that went into handling the Ghost Rider’s powers. For those of you wondering, YES the Penance Stare is in the film, and it’s done quite nicely. I was also a big fan of how his hellcycle’s flaming wheels affected the surface he was riding on. It’s the amount of attention like that, that really goes to show you that the people involved with this film have respect for the character.

Nicolas Cage delivers a solid performance in the film. I know he’s a HUGE fan of comics (he got his last name from the character Luke Cage afterall), and he’s been wanting to star in a comic based film for some time. I remember reading where he was signed to play Superman in Tim Burton’s failed “Superman Lives” project and thinking "oh God, please no," then I remember reading where he was considered for the role of Green Goblin in the first Spider-Man film. Honestly, if there were any comic based character for Cage to bring to life I’m glad it was Ghost Rider. The character of Johnny Blaze has these very strange mannerisms, and personality traits that Cage himself seems to posess in real life. I did notice a similar southern accent to the one he used in Con-Air, but it doesn’t seem out of place at all (the film does take place in Texas afterall). I can’t say enough about Cage in this role, as he perfectly creates a tragic, and fun character on-screen.

Rounding out the rest of the cast we’ve got veterans such as Peter Fonda and Sam Elliot who both deliver solid performances in their respective roles, as well as Wes Bentley who did a surprisingly good job as the demon Blackheart. Donal Logue was great for comic relief to the film, and Eva Mendes did a decent job in her role as Blaze’s childhood sweetheart Roxanne Simpson.

Overall Ghost Rider is a fun way to spend 2hrs of your time, and proves that director Mark Steven Johnson just needed the right character to work with in order to deliver a solid film. It blends the comic genre films with an old school western which makes for a really fun ride, especially when you can hear the western themed music in the background as the Ghost Rider blazes a trail in pursuit of evil.

The film is rated PG-13 for horror and violence. While I wouldn’t suggest taking young (by young I mean around 5-6 years old) children to see this film, I would honestly say that anyone over the age of 8 will enjoy it.

And now, with his take on the Spirit of Vengeance’s big screen debut is our very own “bamf"

It took in 44 million dollars in ticket sales by the end of the first weekend. When last Monday hit the take was over 118 million worldwide. Ghost Rider is a watershed moment in the translation of comics to film.  For this, we are screwed.

Bamf here rematerializing from the void...

I have tried many different takes on my views of the dispensable Ghost Rider.  I was astounded by the films opening weekend box office take; I just could not believe that many people actually were interested in seeing this “B” character at best, stricken in digi-celluloid.  But a few paragraphs in it read more like a report in the Wall Street Journal, and I mentioned Titanic far to many times.  Then I tried to find another angle on it.  A positive one that would be so absurd the reader would just have to know I was not serious.  One paragraph into that I had a raging migraine from trying to come up with delicious adjectives that expelled flowing love.  It should have been easy, or so I thought.  Think of how I really feel, and then write the opposite.  That attempt had me crippled and beaten.  So with two reviews half written for a film that deserves none of the kilobytes of space the text occupies on my hard drive right next to the midget porn and Glen Campbell discography I finally came to a decision.  Something I have been writing in my head for some time, and it’s a topic that my friends will roll their eyes and sigh if someone who doesn’t know me mentions it in my presence.  You know the feeling, “Oh no, here he goes again..”

Simply, I despise Nicolas Cage.  And this will be the vehicle to expunge that view as Cage finally gave me everything I needed to lambaste his “acting”, if so it can be called.

But before I go into this diatribe of hate I have to say this.  I think if Cage and I met we would become good friends.  We hold many similar interests, comics, film, uhhhh, and comics.  And for all I know he may be a swell guy. 

But how many crap films can one ass-bag make before someone has the courage to stand up in front of him and say,

“Dude, your acting F ing sucks.”

Aside from Firebirds, the man brings nothing to the table but a receding hairline and gaping jaw.  Honeymoon in Vegas, Trapped in Paradise, Con mother F ing Air, grrrr, my pulse is rising.  You want to see the worst rendition of an Italian accent?  Just try and sit through 10 minutes of Captain Mandolinis Mandolin, oh god, I can hear my heart beat in my ears!  After viewing a Cage film I am forced to race to the bathroom and take a rape shower to cleanse me of his stink.  The Rock is just about the only thing I can stand him in, but that’s because Sean Connery could carry a sponge with silly eyes glued on the front, and said sponge wouldn’t even need to be new.  Basically when it comes down to his performances over the years its just him changing the inflection of his voice while he stares into the distance looking for another chance to slowly…….pace……his words……so………he…….can sound like……..Kirk.

Aww crap my nose is bleeding.

But what does this have to do with Ghost Rider?  Ill get to that.  For now we all know how much that movie sucked.  Though I don’t feel it’s really the writer/directors fault, it sucked because Ghost Rider is a character that never should have been given its own feature film.  J. Blaze is a cameo character at best, working some fiery demonery, brimstone and the like, then exiting off panel.  If this had been a experiment in technical techniques filled with just 20 minutes of different bike montages then it would have been cool.  When you try to inject a story in a cinematic way for someone so uninteresting, played by a man who is so direly drab, what you get is I in the audience laughing at inappropriate moments.  I point to the young Blaze scene that shows him carving his loves name into a tree, forever it says.  Then he turns to the breasts of the film and she says her daddy wont let her stay and she has to leave.  Cue my maniacal laughter.  Muhahahahahahahha!

The story is full of one cliché beat to the next, because it has to, there is no emotional integrity that can be found.  My favorite working actor Donal Logue looked like he couldn’t even stomach this dialogue he was givin.  Wes Bentley, Blackheart, makes me want to weep considering he took this job.  When you see him (Bentley) do astounding work in American Beauty and The Good Girl I have to ask; what were you thinking man?  And when you are going to ride the bomb down, do it with style, does anyone else feel like Blackheart should have had a mullet?  Can you stomach Peter Fonda flirting dangerously with a Gay hookers take on Mephistopheles?  If you like strange grunts and sequenced leather then this is your movie.

Lets wrap this up before the pain behind my eyes knocks me un-conscious.  Like I said, I think Cage and I could be friends.  When I attended Marvel then and now (read about that here) at UCLA a few months ago they ran a montage of the confused one, Stan Lee as he traversed the sweat filled Comic-con floor.  He meets Cage and you just can tell Blaze to be absolutely loves the fact that he is getting to meet this great icon that spawned a genre.  He said to Stan, “You’re…….the reason…………im playing……….ghost………………….rider.”

Stan held no reply save a blank stare and if there were a thought balloon present I’m certain it would read,

“Are you my publicist, and wait, didn’t I fire your ass?”

Cage is a devoted comic fan, people he named his kid Kal-El.  You might know he was up for playing Supes many years ago, and there is it a great story I highly recommend reading regarding the whole Superman Lives/5/Black suit Burton era as to what went on during those years of development hell.  Read that here.  Cage as a fan has for years been trying to get a comic movie of his own and who could blame him?  I would do the same.  But as a fan he should damn well know that Ghost Rider is the worst thing that could happen to the comic book industry, if only because the high numbers give the impression that what they accomplished in producing was actually good.  You see if tripe like this continues to be produced then the audiences, not just the fan boys, but the general movie seekers who just want to be entertained are going to reject the genre and 100, 200, 250 million dollars will not be earmarked for anymore comic book films.  The ticket payers wont be duped again.  And now it seems a story like The Watchmen is just the satirical look on the genre that we need. Shame on you Mark Steven Johnson.  Shame on you Nic Cage.  And shame, shame, shame on you Brett (the Phoenix is a brooding sidekick) Ratner.  But that’s a whole other rant.  I say again, if mediocre characters like Ghost Rider continue to be pushed to the screen then we the fans will find an industry crippled and destitute by their poor decisions.  Not every character can be Spiderman (and that franchise isn’t even aging well is it?).