Home Sweet Home

Decisions, Decisions

2012-02-14T19:30:00.000-05:00

Two Roads diverged in a yellow wood.....

After months of moaning and crying an general malaise, two choices are before me
1. Go back to school, which I desperately want
2. The chance to do something I love with all my heart, and be part of an immensely worthy cause.

It's not a mutually exclusive thing. I mean the choice is between doing the thing which I love, and by so doing defer school for yet another year, only to face more unknowns at the end of that year OR , not deferring, and going back to school, which will also ultimately lead to another thing which I love (medicine). So choices. And, well...drama.

..............................The Road Not Taken................................

Funny enough, had this been on the table even one month ago, the choice would have been a no-contest issue, but now...

The beaten path

The Road less traveled by

Both have their pros and cons, and even though one path is beaten, both of them are roads I've not taken, so in a sense, they're both of them open frontiers for me. What to do, what to do?

This growing up business is hard!

Love Stories and a link.

2012-02-10T03:00:00.000-05:00

Hey!

So this is a post but not really a post.

It means I am not posting anything here but I have posted something on my other blog that I think might be worth a read (yikes!). So erm...if you want, you can pop over there and take a look (and mebbe join the conversation...no? no????? Well, that's okay too).

I participate in a weekly meme over at Ginger's blog, and the question for today is love stories.
You can pop over by to my other blog to read it, by clicking this link or you can click on the blog link in the upper right hand corner.

Happy Friday and happy birthday me!

Beginner Life Crisis

2012-02-05T08:27:00.004-05:00

"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but desire fulfilled is a tree of life"

Hi!
Okay, this will be the last sad post for a while....I think. I am slowly getting back to my silly old self.

I talked to Quizz two day ago and we are both agreed that we are not at very happy places in our lives right now (a good part of that boils down to family issues and money issues, but that's a whole 'nother post for a whole 'nother time). Of the three of us, Bett is probably the one at the healthiest place right now.

We also came to the conclusion that this can't possibly be normal. I mean, we used to be full of mischief and life and silliness! But now, we have just lost the vast majority of the joie de vivre we once had in so much abundance. And we are only 24! (I am speaking for myself, as this will become true this week! Quizz is young, heh). That can't be right. How can you be fed up and so jaded when you haven't even lived a third of the 60 years life expectancy Ghanaians supposedly have? [God-willing we have more, since a lot of the permutations that go into those 60 years don't apply to us.] I mean how? I thought this ennui was supposed to afflict insecure men in their mid-40's to early 50's.

All around us we see our peers having fun, making plans...you know, carpe diem and all that jazz. We're young, beginners at this life, just now coming into our own. We're supposed to be naive, idealistic, have plans to conquer this world, believe we're invincible.

And yet, here we are, cradling disillusionment and seeing only bleak portents.

We are not amused. Even if it's just a phase - we are too young to be going through this phase, dammit!

I guess a big part of this is growing up amidst a lot of turmoil (like being 'unconventional' women in insanely rigid Ghanaian households) and upheaval (money and other issues within our families).

But growing pains can't be this bad, can they?

Can they?

We need some completely new mojo. So if you know anywhere we can get some, please let us know and we will be grateful!
-Me (on Quizz's behalf too!)

Airline SNAFU

2012-01-17T16:11:00.002-05:00

Well, mebbe a SNAFU is not the correct terminology, but it sounds nice.

I go on msnbc.com and this is one of the news articles.

At 3:00am, on a flight from Miami to Heathrow airport, passengers were woken with an announcement that the plane was about to crash into the sea! Of course everyone began to scream and say their last prayers, etc.

And then right on top of that message, the crew played another message that it was a mistake and everything was okay and no one was gonna crash.

Hah! OMG! I won't be surprised if someone went into cardiac arrest and died right there and then. Can you imagine!

I am anticipating seeing excess pain and suffering lawsuits against BA for that one. And if I were a judge, I would side with the passengers. Hah! I still can't believe it.

Oh well, on the plus side, I am betting everyone on that flight is evaluating their mortality and has a new appreciation for life.

Every cloud has a silver lining, na?

Happy Families

2012-01-17T09:54:00.002-05:00

Its complicated, really complicated.

Back in intro Psych, one of the things we talked about were (I forget the exact terminology) children, and the characteristics they tend to display as a result of birth order. Me, I am the quintessential middle child - all of the hangups that we listed that day were hangups I have. And growing up in a strict Ghanaian household hasn't helped either. Being girl hasn't helped either. In my experience, it's so much better to be a boy.

It's just cloying. And very emasculating - that's the only word I can think of for it. No agency whatsoever. No voice. You can't offer an opinion on anything - we take "children should be seen and not heard" to a whole new level.

It's bad enough growing up. But now? Almost 24 years after I was born and I am in trouble because I refuse to divulge the details of conversations I have with my auntie? Or a friend? I get calls demanding to know where I am and what I am doing every 3 hours of every single day? You never say anything because it leads to more fights and more drama. You also don't say anything when anyone asks you your plans for the future because so long as it doesn't conform to their idea of what your plans should be, there's is going to be a shouting match. No discussion. Children don't talk back..

There is one person in the world who knows EXACTLY how I feel to the T, because she went through it with this same set of people 15 years ago. She got out of it by getting into a shouting match, leaving, and not talking to the old folks for 15 years, until they woke up (the old folks) and decided they wanted to make amends.

But then, if that was all there was to it, it would be easy to just have that fight and leave, na? But no. It's not all terrible. There's lots of sunshine too. Everytime I am just ready to blow up, then something else happens to show that they really do love me, and I really do love them too. So, I keep the peace by keeping my mouth shut nearly 100%. Then the few times I open my mouth, say, to refuse to divulge private conversations about nothing really, ka-boom, drama.

It makes for a very bipolar and very complicated existence. I love and like being with my family...wait, no! I need to get out of here, I am going crazy..wait no! It's nice to be here with my family once again...and the cycle continues.

I do not know what to do.
I feel like an enfant terrible

*Not that you care..but depending on how I feel tomorrow, might keep it up, might take it down.*

If You Thought the Natural Hair World Was Full of Drama

2012-01-16T14:34:00.000-05:00

....Then you haven't ventured into the world of books, and book reviewers, and book bloggers vs. the authors of said books that we read.

Absolutely flabbergasting. Jaw-dropping.

At least with natural hair, none of us are professionals, for the most part. So nasty behavior, well, you take it with a grain of salt, stare at the train-wreck for a while, mebbe even a bit of schadenfreude here and there (been wanting to use that word for a while, heh) and move the heck on.

But in this new world, where you have professionals (tr: the authors. All of these book bloggers are amateurs, and enjoying discussing books and jazz) behaving this badly, and adults behaving this childishly...the mind boggles. 2012 started with amazing flameouts.

At least it helps my pocket. Won't be buying books by authors who behave badly. No ma'am, no siree. I am not contributing $0.35 to your bank account - or $2.07, as the case may be.

You cannot make this stuff up.

New Year, New Resolutions

2011-12-31T10:25:00.001-05:00

Hi everyone.

I hope you all had a good 2011. today is the last day of 2011 and if you're reading this, then you're still alive. That's something to be thankful for.

Well, this year has been...interesting.

I finished college,
Sorta learned how to swim
Moved back home with my parents and got into massive fights over school and life.

A year ago, one of my main resolutions was to be a better friend. To a couple of specific people, I was. To others, the status quo remained the same. So I guess I kinda did halfway on it. Some were good, others not-so-much.

The next big thing for this year is patience. I am not a patient person. It wouldn't matter so much if I didn't have a very quick temper to go with it. So my resolution this year is to...breathe. Stop and take three deep breaths/count to 10 before I say or write or do anything. Even if I'm right, it doesn't help to speak in a temper. You always say something you regret.

Resolution 2 is to work on my relationship with my parents. It's complicated. Really complicated. But it is not as bad as it seems in my head, I see that now. And since it's not bad, there's everything to be said for trying to make it better.

And if ever there was a time to make it better, it's now. We're dealing with a family emergency of sorts, and it looks to color all of our 2012. So that is probably my most important resolution this year. B less quick-tempered, especially with my parents.

Happy 2012 everyone. Here's wishing you all lots of sunshine and happiness and good things in the new year.

Wonder Shall Never Cease

2011-12-14T22:22:00.000-05:00

We are told that at a party a coupla thousand years ago, Jesus proved his mettle by turning water into wine.

Well, nowadays, Ghanaians can turn cocaine into baking soda; or cassava flour - and not just any cocaine. Cocaine that is being used as evidence in courts of law against traffickers. Between confiscating and showing up as evidence in court, we do our miracle-working magic and voila! And since carrying around baking soda or cassava flour isn't against the law.....

That's not all. Our magic extends to whole warehouses of cocaine that has been confiscated from traffickers. The cocaine is impounded, taken to a maximum security warehouse, and locked by those massive locks, put under 24-hour guard and surveillance. Nothing goes in, nothing comes out.

And yet, when the warehouses are once again opened to retrieve the stored drugs, the warehuses are empty.

I tell ya! Forget Jesus, Ghanaians are the new miracle workers!

Eating Your Words

2011-12-11T17:44:00.001-05:00

Ah-a. Remember when I said the UK drives me crazy and I need to get out of here?

Well I was wrong. London is now one of my favorite places in the world to be.

You wanna know why?

Well, apart from it being a much nicer place when I get along with my family, it's......drumroll please.....

THE LIBRARIES.

I have a lot to say about London libraries, ranging from how sparse the pickings are to little ebook offerings to not having some of the most popular books to cataloging URBAN FANTASY and FANTASY books as HORROR (of all things, can you imagine) to just generally being backwards to their idea of romance novels being only Mills and Boon books. (And all of this is me being spoiled by the US. Compared to Ghana ANY library in the UK is heaven. So lemme just put that out there).

Anyway, after two months of rolling my eyes at London libraries I go to the library and was told the catalog and the website would be out for two weeks while they update. I log into my library online and lo and behold - a transformation has occurred. The website had undergone a makeover. You can access everything quicker. It is even more streamlined than my US libraries I am always comparing London libraries to.

Hot damn these English people move fast! Now all the books are classified properly and the pickings have improved drastically. All the "current" fantasy and urban fantasy books are around, and available, and quick and easy to access. I am in library/book heaven right now. And I love London and I will never ever compare or badmouth London libraries again. I am so excited. Christmas has come early for me.

I hope you Christmas season/Holiday season/whatever you choose to call it is going well too!

I love London....libraries.

Caged Bird

2011-11-18T06:31:00.000-05:00

I am a bit more sober after my breakdown yesterday and the day before (thank you, Coraline :D) and there's lots of things to think and plan about (too many family people know of this blog, so the breakdown post had to come down).

I am not particularly happy about any of the new choices, especially since I'd only just gotten a new solution (that cut that school in GH out), only to have an argument about it with parents (well, dad, really) - and it was a suggestion they made that set me off.

But it's all good. Well, not really, but I'm really keeping my head up now. Plans plans plans, exams exams exams, work work work, school school school.

I realized my parents and I haven't lived together a long time and our ideas are different. They don't understand me, but I also realize I don't understand them. At all. So I'll be working on that.

Coraline calmed me down. And do did the one member of my family who understands me. And Jc (and her "tough-talk", lol. She reminds me of my "big sis" who thinks she can talk tough but who's really sweet and kinda cuddly, lol. I'm looking at you, Hot Mama)

Still not too happy about these choices, but they're sane, and workable, and within reach, and what I have, so there's no help for them.(My aunt is STILL going to shake her head at me and tell me I have hung out with too many rich people, lol. That's one of the three things she says when I'm at odds with her/my parents).

I haven't quite gotten there yet, but when I work up the courage to have another melancholy fit and pity-party (believe it or not, a lot of thinking gets done in those times: that's where I got ideas for all of the new plans) I'm going to work out this whole dream/aspiration thing. Changing it is in order, and I don't want to, but lemons and lemonade, and alla that jazz.

I refuse to think about the fact that this whole thing may take even longer than I expected. My sister said to me yesterday "I hope you don't become one of those people who are always in school. You're growing old. Hurry up and make some money so I can spend it - I'm your little sister" Unfortunately, I'm just about to prove her right, haha.

But yeah. The sunshine is out after the storm. And things are slowly looking up.

I'll muster up some prayer when I'm wayyyy calmer
(Did I ever post about my new UK church? I'll do one on them soon)

Hope is the thing with feathers.

On a Much Lighter Note.....

2011-11-17T04:07:00.001-05:00

I read Coraline yesterday!!!(I've been meaning to do so for a couple of years now)

I was still feeling angry after a fight with my parents, and took myself and my kindle off to bed when I realised I had Coraline on loan from the library ready to read. (For the uninitiated, Coraline is a children's book by the fabulous Neil Gaiman, which was made into this fabulously creepy animated movie a few years ago).

I totally forgot myself while I was reading it! I loved it!!

Gaiman says his book tells the story of Coraline, who was small for her age and who would find herself in the darkest danger. By the time it was over, she would find what lay behind mirrors, have a close call with a bad hand, and come face-to-face wither her other mother; she'd rescue her true parents from a fate worse than death and triumph against overwhelming odds.

He also says it's the weirdest book he's written and the book he's most proud of.
I say he's right.

It's a children's adventure novel, and a horror story for adults (It's true. Most kids love it, and most adults tend to think it's creepy for them and way too creepy for kids). It's fantastic! If you ever get a chance to read it, or see the animated movie, you should.

It also helped me get a bit sane. And I've been doing some thinking. New plans ahead (still need to do some more thinking), but I still need to get out of the UK, for a few months/weeks at least. This place really does drive me insane. It's the only place in the world that does that to me. I wonder why.

All I ever wanted

2011-11-04T17:56:00.000-04:00

It's always been what I wanted. Always. For as long as I can remember. Everyone has always told me -
"No, not this one. here are better ones out there; stay in the US, stay in Europe, you'll get a better one.

I didn't listen. It's what I wanted. With all its flaws, all its problems, it's what I wanted.

I watched people go there and I knew. Me too, I wanted to go there. One day I wanted to go through there too.

I went away to college for four years and I still held on to my dream.

Everyone thought I'd change; but no, I kept it in my heart because it's what I wanted.
When they realized I wasn't going to change my mind, they changed their tactics. Why that one? There are other ones, you know. Right in Ghana. If it is Ghana you want to stay in, then you can go to the other places. Same thing, really. Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

I heard them. I listened. I nodded. I saw the wisdom. But still, my heart was in the place where it's always been. Hah! Since before 2001 I've had this dream. Yet in one stroke, they've taken it all from me.

I can't go. There is no way I can go. No way. They call me an "international student." Well, I can't afford the international student price. Not now. I am NOT an international student, dammit. I'm Ghanaian too!! I was born here. I live here. I belong here.

So I can't go. The place I've wanted for over 10 years, I can't go.

At this point it will be an act of God that gets me in there.

It feels like my heart is breaking. It hurts so much to know that I have wanted this, looked forward to it for so long, in the face of all this opposition, held on for so long.....only to have it crumble before my very eyes. It feels like my heart is going to wither and die.

Ghana!

2011-10-02T23:49:00.000-04:00

Hiya everyone!

Wassup? I have been in Ghana for three weeks and so far it has been the very best of times and the very worst of times. From eating the best, most succulent, most mouth-watering, most delicious, most fantabulous grilled tilapia, to the worst case of diarrhea in my life (not related to the tilapia), to people giving unsolicited advice/opinions about my hair and my nose ring (sigh).

Ghana seems to not believe in internet connectivity. Smh. I have been on the internet prolly less than 10 times total since I got here (and only about half of those times had a connection that was halfway decent, I tell you). But there are also bananas – the best bananas you’ve ever had (none of that gunk the Americans and Europeans call banana, ick!!).

As if atrocious internet was not enough, there are the ignorant radio talk show guests, and more infuriatingly, the ones who think they are talking to a nation of imbeciles. I swear when I am dead of apoplexy at 60, the reason will be Ghana and the many idiot radio talk show guests. Posts coming up on that….if I can muster the energy.

I hope you’ve been having fun on the blogosphere without me. I missed you too! :D

Silly fun

2011-08-28T20:35:00.000-04:00

I saw this one on of the goodreads groups I'm in and I haven't been able to stop giggling when I look at it.

I hope your week goes well.

God bless.

Lady Jaye.

Water Rafting

2011-08-26T16:05:00.007-04:00

Over the summer, the science department at Haverford organizes an annual white-water rafting trip for the people (students and former students) who are working in the labs during the vacation, and you have to sign up to go for it.

Of course I wasn't going to sign up. I am not an adrenaline junkie for all my bravado, and swimming lessons established that I am a sinker, not a floater, lol. So it was very obvious to me that these people who organized the trip wanted to kill me. I was so sure I would die if I went. Cue in my labmate, S, who wanted to go, but she did not want to go alone. Everyone else in the lab was too serious-minded to take the day off (even though we were allowed to take a paid day if we wanted to go - after all, the professors were the ones who organized it. So it wasn't like we were playing hooky or anything).

Anyway, S wanted to go, but she didn't want to go alone. more specifically, she wanted someone from our lab to come along with her. No one volunteered. She fixed me with puppy-dog eyes, so I offered to go with her, sure that she would change her mind (she did not sound too definite about wanting to go). Sure enough, a few days later she said she'd probably not go, seeing as no one in the lab was taking the offer of a paid day off and a free water-rafting trip. She didn't want to be the slacker that went off to have fun. Fine by me. I told her I didn't really want to go anyway, since I was going to die if I went.

Ms. S. decides that we are going to go and that we are going to have fun. I resisted; she resisted my resistance. She was as adamant that I was not going to die as I was that I was going to die. I tried to explain to her that if I did not sit in my ancestors/uncles' canoes who were fishermen in Ghana, why the heck would I want to sit in a makeshift canoe in America? She would not budge. So with me grumbling about how this is what you get for following white people out on their "adventures," we went in search of swimsuits for the big day.

On said big day, about 50 of us total, took a road trip to the rafting place. After a lot of talking, and signing disclaimers to the effect that it wasn't their fault if one died on the rapids(hah!), we got into our life jackets along with the other groups who had shown up, and went to the rapids on the Lehigh River. The had closed the dam leading to the river, so the 'rapids' were rather quiet and the water was not too deep. They put us in rubber canoes (4-5 people in a canoe) gave us paddles, and set us off along the 10-mile course.

Let me tell you -me, who was so sure I was going to die - I think I had the most fun out of all the people over there. I had the time of my life. We paddled in the cold water, splashed the people in adjoining boats...we had tons of fun. My boat got off to a rocky start, literally. We were always bumping into rocks, getting stuck on them. But once we had our groove on, there was no stopping us. We went from being the very last boat for the first 3 miles to being the very first boat for the remaining 7 miles. It was sooo much fun! I guess there is something to be said for adrenaline junkies after all. I am so glad S ignored my many complaints and dragged me along. And we got an awesome photo too. Imma put it up here for a coupla days, and then take it off - I got my internet anonymity to preserve here, lol.

You missed the rafting pic, lol.
Source: lagirlsweetea.blogspot.com

Yep. Tons of fun. And the most adventurous thing I've done in a really long while.
Anyone else done anything fun lately?

Another Natural Hair Rant

2011-08-23T10:27:00.003-04:00

source: graphicleftovers.com

My latest natural hair rant comes from statements made about the Terresentials Mud Hair Wash by various people, including some of my favorite people on youtube and hair forums. It all started when I watched one of the videos posted by Naptural85, whom I positively adore. She stated that she only used to TE mud wash to clean her hair now, and it left her hair so moisturized she had no need for conditioner, etc.

Wow. What a resounding endorsement! Who wouldn't want a product that moisturized your hair so much it made conditioning products unnecessary? I made up my mind to try the TE mud wash at some point in time. I did some more searches on the youtube-osphere, the blogosphere, and the forum-osphere. And pretty much every post/video I saw had the same ringing endorsement. Perfect!

Then it all devolves from there.

Nap85 had another video about how conditioners were made of synthetic chemicals that coated your hair instead of moisturizing it blah blah blah. I was so disappointed in seeing that video. I also saw other posters on forums post the same things. THAT is what bothers me. It is a lot of fear-mongering/antin-synthetic products lobbying for reasons which, when you examine them a little more closely, are just a bunch of BS (yes I said it).

Conditioner is SUPPOSED to coat the hair! Shampoo is MEANT to strip the hair! That is exactly what they were manufactured to do! Shampoos remove dirt, and conditioners coat the hair shaft to help retain moisture. Simple as that. And it is not a bad thing. I get upset when people make those out to be bad things because they are not. It just reeks of ignorance and buys into the myth that just because something is 'natural' it is better. Don't even get me started on the "synthetic products" BS. Ignorance is not sexy.

As for the mudwash, I might still try it at some point in time, but now i am curious as to how it manages to help hair retain moisture. I bet it probably has a depositing ingredient (like a humectant or something) that attracts moisture and/or locks moisture in.

An enthusiastic endorsement works so much better than a stupid-justifications approach.

I'm thinking another break from the online natural hair world will be in order. I will be on goodreads reading romance and fantasy novels, lol.

This London Foolishness

2011-08-09T17:12:00.001-04:00

I got here about a week and a half ago, when it was all peaceful and dandy as usual. Then the dude got shot, and then the riots started.

I am quite frankly appalled at some of the analyses and the excuses made for these idiots! It is one thing to protest (peacefully or vehemently) against the treatment the police have given you (as far as I can tell, the family were not mad so much that the guy was shot as the way the police treated them, like persona non-grata, refusing to give any explanation as to why their family member was shot). It is also another thing to protest against the unfairness in society and alla that jazz.

RIOTING, LOOTING, STEALING and ARSON is NOT an acceptable way of protesting racism/hopelessness or whatever it is they are protesting. Nonsense! These kids deserved to be seriously beaten. A few really hefty slaps should help a lot. Mind you, all of this foolishness is not being perpetrated int he places where the "oppressors" (ie the rich people and the people who delight in keeping the downtrodden downtrodden) live; it is taking place 20 minutes from me, where other downtrodden, hard-working, trying-to-make-it people are living. These idiots are not protesting. They are stealing and thieving and setting people's livelihoods and homes ablaze.

But no. We sit here and talk about take a closer look at the reason behind this violence. We can't have the police hit people with batons because they are kids. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? They are kids and they are breaking into boots to steal stuff, shops to steal clothes and electronics? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Since when is racism/downtroddenness excuse for thievery and arson? And against other people who are downtrodden and victims of racism or whatever themselves?!!!

And then these STUPID STUPID people who run this country tell the police to get on the streets to stem the riots - but soft!: the police are not allowed to do anything but stand there and watch. So you see footage of these animals throwing stuff at the police, and the police standing there in their helmets, doing nothing. If my husband or brother or sister was a policeman/woman, I wouldn't want them on those streets with those murdering animals.

Like @kotibotor said on twitter - try stealing something at Accra Mall and see what will be done to you. Instead you let these fools run around like the indisiciplined hooligans that they are and then make all sorts of idiotic excuses for them by playing the race/downtrodden card. Mtchew. They sit in their safe, comfy homes and spew foolishness that makes them sound like they are socially conscious people when in fact they are idiots. The mind boggles, I tell ya.

And everyone wonders why I try to get out of London at the slightest opportunity. But now I am stuck in this place. And it's getting closer.
Yesterday it was Croydon.
Today it is Thorton heath.
Yesterday it was 20 minutes away from me
Today it is a mere 16.5 minutes.
@#%$!

Updates

2011-08-01T22:56:00.000-04:00

Hi everyone!

I am well and truly done with college. I flew out of the US on Saturday and am ensconced at home with the parents in London.
Since I don't have a job anymore, i gotta get on my finding-a-job-grind.
I am done with college, but not microbiology it seems - that science just won't let me go.
I applied to present a poster at a conference in India and will be going contingent upon receiving a travel grant award. So please keep me in your prayers so I may go ostensibly to hang out with microbiologists but really to check out the sights of India (Taj Mahal anyone?!)

And anyway, the really big news in my life right now is that as a graduation present to myself, i bought me a kindle (I figured i deserve some happiness in this lifetime :D)

And let me tell you - I am in book-lovers' heaven! One-click, instant delivery to the kindle and i have my book! Additionally (and this is an important additionally) NOONE can judge you for the books that you read. Now I can read books with titles like "In Bed with the Highlander" without people giving me weird looks, lol. I justify this by telling myself I read for escapism and pleasure haha. But I don't read much literary fiction. I find most of it pretentious.

So that's what I have been doing with my kindle - reading a LOT of romances.
I also went back to my favorite genre ever - fantasy. And I am discovering some of the sub-genres within it: paranormal romance and urban fantasy. I am LOVING it!!!

I am also slowly going back to reading non-fiction books. The non-fiction i have tackled so far is mostly either related to Africa or related to Christianity - G K Chesterton, anyone. and i am loving it also.

I am toying with picking up some mystery/thrillers and some young adult novels, as I happen to like those too.

Needless to say, having a kindle is one of the big reasons my bank account is slowly diminishing. What can I say - books are one of my few vices, haha.

So that's what i have been up to. That and water rafting. But that's a post for another day.
Here's hoping your days and weeks are going fabulously. As for me, I am usually passing my days in Kindled bliss, lol.

The story of my life so far.

2011-05-28T23:33:00.000-04:00

In case anyone is even slightly interested,

I GRADUATED!!!!

I have that degree in Latin and English to prove it, hehe. (they really did. the diploma itself is in Latin, and then we have a sheet with an English translation - although, you know, since I can't read Latin, that diploma could be saying anything, hehe). So now I have a bachelor's degree in Biology (systems biology and a thesis in molecular microbiology)

It all makes me feel important for like two seconds until I remember I am no closer to finishing (or starting) medical school, and that I am for all intents and purposes, an educated and jobless bum right now. But the operative word is educated, so thanks be to God.

I was at the American Society of Microbiologists Meeting to present a poster with some other authors (they did most of the work; I got invited along only because my thesis supplied some of the information they needed)....and microbiology is great, but there is only so much of it I can take (like 30mins) before I start going bonkers.

Anyway, so I spent more time eyeing the men in uniform (oooooh! baby! in case you can tell, I positively adore soldiers) who were errything from biologists to doctors to paristologists - the whole nine yards - i spent more time eyeing them and all the cute, nerdy (not all of them) young professionals at the meeting.

And then it happened... as it has been happening for the past three years.

None of the cute guys showed ANY interest in me. No young professional, no cute young navy officer, no young professionals, none. But guess who tried to pick me up - a dude that was older than my daddy! and he was supposed to be a student mentor during the meet! the heck?! Awingaa!!!! (a Gh term for older dudes who like to pick up younger women. hmm - on a side note I guess it could apply to cougars too). OLDER than my daddy! a "mentor". And the homeless dudes on the street, and the aimless waifs too. Those were the people who either tried to pick me up and/or tell me I am cute.

And waiters. Not that there is anything wrong with waiters (it's an honest living and there is no shame in serving other), but why is that no young professionals, no cute young doctors, microbiologists, business men, college grads - you know, all of those people - why is it that none of them EVER try to chat me up?

After much thought I have come to the unavoidable conclusion that the problem must be me. It must be. If all the cute guys are bypassing me and all the aimless people and the nasty old men are gravitating towards me, then it must be me.

This has been the story of my life, and it still hasn't changed.

But I am a graduate, and for that I thank God from the bottom of my heart. It's not been an easy four years, but He's been with me thus far and has seen me through. (Now if only he'd just send some (highly) eligible people my way - preferably of the tall and dark kind, but no. hmph!)

Here's a blurry pic of me getting that diploma (it's blurry on purpose, haha).

Swimming Update!

2011-04-21T12:58:00.000-04:00

Hi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Remember me in your prayers people (or your thoughts, or whatever it is that you do :D)

Two more weeks to graduation and i am doing near perfect in all my classes EXCEPT FOR THE ONE CLASS I NEED TO FINISH MY MAJOR AND GRADUATE. In that class I am pretty much failing. And i have only three more classes to get a passing grade. Doesn't help that the professors hate me and i hate them too. :(

Second thesis almost done. Being a lab rat is hard....

In swimming news, ie the purpose for this post - I can swim!!!! I can swim!!!! BUT!

I do it all about 1 inch below the water. Which mean when i am floating/elementary backstroke, my face and body are an inch under. And when i do the front crawl, my entire body is an inch under (Aka i can't breathe). And we don't know what to do. The instructor says my posture is really relaxed now, and my technique is actually quite good - so she doesn't know what to say - I am not doing anything wrong - I just hang out an inch below the water.....

Although she once told us about "floaters" (big boobies) and "sinkers" (big butts), and since I have been told since kingdom come that i have a very huge sinker for my small frame - I think I know why i am hanging out below the surface :). I haven't told her that though.

But yeah, swimming season is over for me. If i want to continue learning, I would have to pay someone to teach me.

I hope your weeks are coming along better than mine.
1 more week till classes end and three more till graduation!!!!!!!!!!

See you all on the other side.............

Swimming!!!

2011-03-23T11:30:00.001-04:00

Back to swimming!!!
I can let go of the kickboard for a second and still remain afloat, lol.
(Refusing to shampoo my hair after swimming. 4x a week, no sir. i can't redo twists every weekend. just have to settle for a conditioner after swim and hope for the best).

That's what we are working on. Letting go of the kickboard, so I can practice some front crawl, hehe.
(I can do everything (but with my kickboard, :D)

Fell of the "no hair blogs" challenge yesterday and today, but back in effect.
As I was looking over old posts, I was so glad (because I would have been caught up in it all if it were current, lol). Back to leaving hair blogs alone. I think I have read all of Jc's posts up until Feb of last year over again, and I have gone through all the beauty brains post on hair :D

Discovered twitter.

Had a long chat with my professor about his class and my (lack of ) progress in it.
Apologized to him for some bad judgment two days ago :(, ended up crying in his office after crying all night :( :(

Prayed. I haven't done so in a while. It was great. It calmed me down, and helped me get through what would have been a terrible day. God hears, :D

Got things going in the lab (I feel like a proper scientist now. At first I felt like a buffon playing around in a lab I had no business being in. I hate molecular microbiology with a passion. gimme systems biology any day!). My research is coming along nicely.

That's it of my rambling for now. Back to lab.

Hoping you've had a good week!!

Plans

2011-03-17T23:26:00.000-04:00

Go home. Go south
Go to the land my soul loves
The land my heart adore with all her being
My land. Mine. Home.

Can Black People Be Racist?

2011-03-15T10:29:00.003-04:00

Nobody seems to acknowledge this possibility.

In class we watched a video of Toni Morrison (loves her!!!) being interviewed by some white lady.

The white lady asks a seemingly innocuous question about her writing, and Toni proceeds to lambaste her (although in a gentle voice) on how racist the question was. And Toni had a point too. you had to think about it to see it.

Well anyways, as the interview went on, Toni described her father's outlook on life. And then she said that when she thought about it, there was nothing else she could say but that her father was racist (against white people though).

Now, the history of racism is complicated and whatnot, but when I see a quote like this:

PEOPLE NEED TO REALIZE THAT BLACK PEOPLE’S MENTALITIES CANNOT CHANGE WHEN WE LIVE IN A WORLD OF WHITES AND OTHER MAJORITIES. STOP ACTING LIKE BLACK PEOPLE DONT HAVE A RIGHT TO FEEL OPPRESSED. WE ARE! ITS 2011 AND I CAN STILL SAY THAT WHITES ARE THE REASON FOR MOST HATRED. LOOK AT HOW THEY ARE TREATING OBAMA. THEY DONT EVEN BELIEVE THAT HE IS AMERICAN AND HIS MOM IS JUST AS WHITE AS THEY ARE. SO WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT THEY LOVE OUR HAIR. JUST BECAUSE ONE OR TWO SAY’S IT, DOESNT MEAN THAT THEY ACUALLY ACCEPT OUR HAIR. BLACK PEOPLE WILL ALWAYS BE THE MOST SUPPORTIVE WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO EVERYTHING! BLACK LOVE!
(Yes I copied and pasted it)

(I know, I know, I am OFF natural hair websites for lent, it is a process, lol.)

I am immediately taken aback by the amount of vitriol in it. And it smack of racism to me.
Generalizing and applying negative stereotypes to a whole race of people is not okay.
To not be able to take individuals at face value because of their skin color is not okay.
To ascribe ulterior motives to people because of their skin color is not okay.

To be sure, racism and anger are different.
The anger people feel at the pervading effects of racism is different from the hate directed at the said perpetrators of racism.

So... can black people be racist? What at all is the definition of racism? Why don't we speak of it more as a black community? Our own racism (if indeed we can be racist)? I mean, racism is not a good look for anyone, whether or not we have been victims of it. Besides, hate never heals anyone. In the long run we are the same people who suffer it. It's cancerous. It eats and eats at us until there is nothing left.

The hate that hate produced indeed.

Of Africans and Misogyny

2011-03-12T09:10:00.002-05:00

It would seems Africans (yes, yes, I know I am generalizing) - both men and women - hate women.
I can't think of any other explanations for it.

Of course it is not couched in those terms. It is put in other words. Words like "proverbs 31 woman," or "submission," or "all-rounded woman," or "truly independent woman."

Yep. My people hate women. Hah!

Why else would bella naija (a site run by an African woman, to boot) put up idiotic posts about "domesticity" and have idiot men and women agreeing with the article? And of course they defend the article by going on and on about "the truth in the author's words."

I grew up loving to read and doing the oddest things, but hating domestic chores, especially cooking. Of course: I had to learn how to do them, so I did. I distinctly remember my dad telling me I am of no use as a woman if I can't cook. Yes.

In fact for awhile, I was one of those self-hating women too. I also distinctly remember thinking about all the women in the Western world who didn't know how to cook, and thinking to myself, "these women are not serious."

But as I grew up, I began to realize.... a woman's worth is not tied to the things she can or can't do. It just is. It is one of those immutable things in the world. The Bible says "And God created man in His own image, MALE AND FEMALE HE CREATED THEM." End of story.

The idiot author of the insipid article on bellanaija goes on and on about women who can't cook, can't switch on generators, and can't change lightbulbs, and says in the end something to the effect of "most African men need a woman to be able to do these things, otherwise you are useless to them" - in the name of speaking hard truths.

And the misogynistic women on there were touting how they agreed with him, and how knowing how to do "female and male" domestic chores increase your value and esteem in men's eyes, and how you can survive without a man if you can do both. Pause.

African woman, hear me well: ANY MAN WHO IS WILLING TO TIE YOUR WORTH TO THE CHORES YOU CAN DO.....and not to you as a person, is most probably not worth it.

God, don't get me started. I will not die of apoplexy because of misogynistic men and women from my part of the world. Breathe in..out. Goos-frabba - say it slowly.

Being able to change lightbulbs and generators and tyres are all well and good and practical things to know. Fair enough. But how many men can do this properly today sef? Besides, most of them are not even too hard. I didn't know anything about changing lighbulbs until I had to change my first lightbulbs, and would you know, even without a MAN around, I changed it, and it worked! Tyres on the highway are another story, but that is why mechanics and car checkups exist. to insinuate that these skills are useful because they enable women survive without a man is disrespectful to women. Plenty of women have survived without men, as they put it, without knowing how to do any of these things. To insinuate that these skills increase a woman's value in men's eyes is an insult of the highest degree. Again, I say it: fools! idiots! Besides, what the hell is a "manly task?"

You know - mebbe for lent, I should just get off all blogs. The idiocy is becoming too much.

Visions of Heaven

2011-03-10T05:13:00.003-05:00

They claim the world is going to end on May 21, 2011. Side eye.
That would NOT be okay.
I mean really? Why would God do such a thing? After all the years of school I suffered, to end the world a mere 5 days after I get my degree? Yeah. No.

But then, i got to thinking. Maybe, just maybe, there are some good trade-offs to being carted off to heaven before my time, lol.

Since everything is better in heaven, I figure food tastes so much better in heaven too.

Just imagine how much better grilled this grilled tilapia would taste!
Yep! :D