Food for thought

"The Divine Order" - an inspiring film

2021-01-09T18:43:00.002-05:00

Hi there! I am back here now.

This blog has been neglected for a few years but now I will tend to it again. Happy 2021!

Last night, I watched "The Divine Order" on Amazon Prime. It is a German language film set in Switzerland in 1971. A regular housewife, Nora Ruckstahl, becomes an unlikely leader for women's suffrage in her village.

In the United States, in just a few weeks, we are about to watch the inauguration of Kamala Harris as the first female Vice President of color. The world over, female leaders have blazed a new trail from Jacinda Ardern – the Prime Minister of New Zealand, to Angela Merkel, the Chancellor of Germany. Margaret Thatcher (UK), Indira Gandhi (India) and Golda Meir (Israel), had led their respective countries as Prime Ministers, decades ago.

It is unimaginable for us that people openly said that women not having the right to vote or be in a position of political leadership or even have a place outside the home, was in accordance with the Divine Order!

The story starts with Nora being a normal housewife who sees her husband and kids off to work and school, lunch bags all packed, then takes care of all the chores such as cleaning and laundry at home. Her father-in-law lives with them and hollers at her for his cup of tea. She is the one who keeps the house together, from preparing meals to tucking the kids into bed.

One sees a quiet discontent as she starts thinking of taking up a part-time job, but her husband Hans objects to it, even saying it is against the law for her to do it without his permission. Hans is a loving husband though, and at one point in the film, Nora calls him “the love of her life”.

Her sense of fairness gets more and more awakened by happenings in her personal life. Her teenaged niece, Hanna, is quite rebellious, listening to the rock music of the 70s and heavily influenced by hippie culture. Her going around with boys has landed her in trouble with her parents. Offering to mediate and be her chaperone when the girl meets her new boyfriend whom she is rather serious about, Nora has her first brush with the feminist movement for gender equality.

Hanna goes off on a two-hour jaunt with her boyfriend on his motorbike much to Nora’s chagrin. Wandering through the streets and gazing at shops in the town, she is accosted by women’s right activists, distributing pamphlets, campaigning for women’s rights to vote. A woman at a stall introduces her to activist literature and books by authors such as Betty Friedan.

Nora devours these writings at home while her husband is away on a work-related trip. They have a profound impact on her.

Her dissatisfaction with the status quo grows as Hanna is first sent off to an institution for women, and when she escapes from there, to a woman’s prison. Hanna’s mother Theresa, a mild, subservient woman, and Nora visit Hanna in prison, but the girl refuses to speak with them, having nothing but contempt for her mother’s cowardice for not standing up for her own daughter.

Nora attends an event with other women where her husband’s boss, Mrs. Wipf, ironically a woman who had to take over the family business and had no husband or children, champions the cause of blocking women’s right to vote and asks for donations. It is then that we see her first quiet act of courage when she is the only one to refuse donating, and openly says she supports women’s right to vote.

She becomes good friends with fellow attendee, an older woman named Vroni, who has lost all her money and the pub that she and her late husband owned, due to her husband’s gambling. Women did not have a say in the family’s financial decisions, and Vroni now survives on welfare. One day, she along with her daughter Magda - a lawyer who is now a stay-at-home mom and wife of a doctor - and Nora, once saunter into the Italian restaurant that was once her restaurant, and develop a friendship with the free-spirited owner, Gabriella, who is separated from her husband and runs the place on her own.

Nora’s rebellion grows from that simple “no” at the fundraiser, to getting her hair cut in the latest tyle and wearing bell bottom jeans to the disapproval of her father-in-law, to telling her children and father-in-law to clear their own dishes and get what they need from the fridge. She starts asking for what she wants from asking her husband’s opinion on women’s suffrage to telling him she wants to work, even applying and securing an interview without his permission. She starts speaking up against what is unfair.

The concept of feminine power crosses over into their intimate lives, too, as Vroni, Nora and Theresa become more aware of their own sexuality after a talk held by a Swedish lady, drawing upon the ancient Indian spiritual concept of “yoni” and female power. As she says, “The personal is political”.

The trickle of rebellion grows into a flood as many women in the village join her in demanding the right to vote and the movement reaches a crescendo when all of them go on a strike, piling up in a big house in one giant camp, taking a break from their homes, husbands and drudgery.

Nora is a feisty woman, but also a passionate one who loves her family. The film brings the subtlety and strength of the love between Hans and Nora despite all the jolts to their relationship.

Swiss women finally won the right to vote in 1971.

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has.” – Margaret Mead

Great movements start off as little acts of rebellion, when one individual says “No” to injustice and inequality, among friends and family, and then in the larger society and world.

Inspiration, personality, creativity

2013-09-24T15:41:00.000-04:00

I've been away for a while now. Not really away because I am working on some blog posts that are not yet complete.

Last week, on a whim, I did some research on personality types and took some personality tests. I got slightly different results on some of them but there were certain consistent patterns. It was fascinating to read about the sixteen different personality types as described by the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator.
This is a theory that was postulated by Isabel Briggs Myers and her mother, Katharine Cook Briggs, based on the work of the famous psychotherapist, Carl Jung. There is another system called the Enneagram, that has nine basic personality types.

I took MBTI style tests on a few sites:

http://www.personalitytype.com

http://www.16personalities.com

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/Jtypes2.asp

http://teamtechnology.co.uk/

Of course, I think that these tests should be taken with a grain of salt just like astrology profiles. The Myers-Briggs test is far more scientific than an astrology profile but humans in general are complex. A psychological portrait tells one more about one's proclivities, talents and latent gifts as well as chinks in the psychological armor, however, in my humble opinion, it cannot map someone's abilities one hundred percent.
As for me, I got more inspiration and encouragement to continue writing and explore my other interests. I am not telling you which type I lean towards the most, I'll leave that up to you.

Next, I embarked upon a creativity test. You can try it here. I must confess that I was somewhat disappointed with the results. I was hoping that I would be rated as more creative:).

I was wondering - do our upbringing and education play a part in growing or hindering our inherent creativity? I feel a big resounding YES. Not only the education system but the surrounding culture.

When I first came to the United States, I was awed by the number of new books penned by random people from different walks of life and promoted on talk shows on TV. Equally inspiring was the number of newly patented inventions advertised on TV, yeah, the kind that tells you to buy in the next ten minutes for less than $20.00 or pay five times as much later.
Well, it's not the buy-now-or-else clause of the advertising that blew me over but the sheer number of ordinary people who were inventors. True, their inventions may not be on the scale of Marconi (radio) or Gutenberg (the printing press) but they are impressive nevertheless.
There are common problems that are faced in everyday life, for example, overflowing closets that are a nightmare of chaos and disorganization. Enter a vacuum bag to seal 10x the number of clothes that can fit in one cubic foot than just regular folding and stacking. This is just one example.

Have you thought about the humble safety pin? It is not so common in the US but in India, it is ubiquitous. In fact, a safety pin is a must-have accessory for every Indian woman, helping keep her sari pleats in place, "dupatta" (shawl) of the salwar kameez on her shoulder and substituting as an emergency clip for everything from stubborn, bent hooks of a brassiere or a blouse to missing buttons on a shirt. I have seen my own mother carrying them around like pendants on her wedding chain.
Broken sandals are hastily mended with a safety pin clutching the discordant straps so that the wearer can get home without having to go barefoot.
Here is a scandalous secret. The salwar kameez (women's outfit with a long tunic, loose pants and a covering scarf-like garment on the top) or kurta-pyjama in India (long tunics worn with loose pants by both men and women) are typically fastened at the waist by tying a knot with a string known as the "naada". Ditto for sari petticoats.
Often, one end of the "naada" gets pulled into the slot thus making knot tying impossible. Imagine this scenario in a public place! Another nightmare is the "naada" knot getting so tight that one can't untie it thus inducing a panic attack in a toilet. Only a knife or pair of scissors or Houdini with nails as long and sharp as a comic book evil character can snap the "naada" or in the latter case, untie it.
If you happen to be someone that is paranoid about germs and trims their nails regularly, woe unto you.

That's where our little hero, the safety pin comes in. My mother taught me how to insert a string into a slot using a safety pin when I was very young. If you have to cut the string, then a safety pin can hold the billowing ends of your "pyjama" together until you get home or can change.
Now one can understand why it is called the "safety" pin.

A few years ago, the famous model Elizabeth Hurley made waves when she showed up at an event wearing a Versace dress that was held together with safety pins.
Cheers to Walter Hunt, the inventor of the safety pin (thanks to Wikipedia).

Another commonplace invention that we now take for granted is the zipper. Had it not been for this, I guess, to tweak a famous phrase, we would all be having our "naadas" in a twist. Google Doodle celebrated the inventor of the zipper, Gideon Sundback, recently. In fact, that's how I got to know about him.

Check out this page on inspiring inventions. Speaking of inspiring, there is this prodigal 15 year old boy, Jack Andraka, who has come up with an invention that could make early cancer detection much cheaper, helping to save many more lives (courtesy of Forbes).

Hope we all make use of our latent inventive skills, in small ways and large.

Hiatus - Online learning and more blogs

2013-06-29T20:41:00.002-04:00

Sorry for the long absence. I have been really busy, learning new things online through the mega-online learning portal, coursera.org. This is a site that offers proper college courses from various universities across the world, from University of London to U.S. universities to universities from Europe, Asia and Australia. They cover a wide array of subjects - physics, biology, computer programming, even history, law, literature, music and architecture.

Coursera has been voted the Startup of the Year in 2012 and rightly so. This is a perfect example of social entrepreneurship, a business that adds value to its customers and society in general. Many people, especially adults who are past college age, who are married with kids and have full time jobs, may not have the time or money to go to school full time. Some are in the process of finding an alternative career, of finding their true calling.
Part time courses are a great way to explore one's talents and interests. However, not everyone resides close to top universities or gains entry to them. Online courses fulfill a gap, a thirst for knowledge from the best. Coursera has tapped into this need and the huge potential that lies untapped within each one of us.
Do check out their courses.

There are a few more blogs that I have been checking out and they are truly inspiring. I'll write about them in my next post.

Femininity, feminism and cultural baggage - I

2013-04-03T00:14:00.000-04:00

Last Friday, I came across this on Yahoo titled - Is Alaska the Worst State in the Nation for Women?

The article deals with issues faced by women in Alaska - comparatively lower pay that women get as compared to men, the domestic violence and alcoholism that have taken a toll on society and the rising rate of incarceration for women.

A glance through the comments will reveal that many people think that one of the reasons women get lesser pay is because men take up the more difficult jobs in Alaska - mining, logging, oil rigging being some of these. It is commonly accepted that women are physically weaker than men, hence are not suitable for certain kinds of jobs. The statement does have truth in it but social attitudes sometimes don't just stop at that.

There are some people who claim that women should ideally be running the household, raising children, cooking and cleaning because that's what nature intended.

Imagine my surprise when I read some of the comments on this article which was of all the pieces, a brief interview with Salma Hayek (I know...what??!!). The comments are not misogynistic but do reference feminism.

Feminism, anti-feminism seemed to be the rant of the day. And it was Good Friday, the day when everyone should be more compassionate and forgiving. Oh, okay...

To all those guys who think that women are best suited to feminine jobs (read - caring for them and their babies) and men are best suited to masculine jobs (all the hard work outside that civilization owes its existence to) and that men are the reason that we have everything from roads to farms to washing machines -

The Hunter Gatherers -
Disclaimer: I am not an anthropologist but have read at least one book related to the hunter-gatherer way of life. Besides, I am gonna use reliable sources and then my imagination.

Firstly, if you accept evolution and that we are all basically animals, then pray, look around at the animal kingdom. Look at birds such as crows and pigeons, penguins and storks, wild animals such as tigers, lions, snakes and mammals such as horses, cattle and sheep and then at our immediate ancestors in the animal world - regular monkeys, chimpanzees, bonobos and apes.
Okay, when I say "look", I don't mean that you have to hurry to the nearest zoo or book that safari in Kenya.
For now, the Internet, National Geographic and Animal Planet should suffice:).

Even if the alpha male in the group has a harem, the females are just not sitting around doing nothing. Almost every animal that I can think of (with some possible exceptions like the female queen honeybee, even then worker female bees in the hive have a lot to do), whether male or female, hunts or forages for its own food. True, the females predominantly care for the young but that's not the only thing they do nor are they wusses.

In the case of the King of the jungle, the Lion, in open areas, the females do the bulk of the hunting but in certain wooded areas, the males and females hunt separately. There is an excellent source here on the African Lion Working Group site.
Wikipedia has an article on lions, do refer to the Hunting and diet section.

It is the mother bear/tiger that also teaches the cubs to hunt. Here is a very informative section on Wikipedia, describing how the tigress coaches her cubs, documented by none other than the famous conservationist and hunter, Jim Corbett.
And this is another great site on polar bears and the role the mother bear plays in passing on hunting skills to the next generation - Polar Bears International.

It is not for nothing that Rudyard Kipling said, "For the female of the species is more deadly than the male." [Reference: goodreads.com]

In the case of penguins, the male and the female penguin both care for their little ones, see this touching section on Emperor Penguins, on Wikipedia.

Let's now transition to humans who were not merely satisfied with hunting.

Say, the men go out to hunt for their daily meal. Even if we assume that women never contributed to the hunt, what do you think they were doing in their caves all day?
They were certainly not watching "Cavewoman Bachelorette" and "The Real Housewives of the Paleolithic Era", were they?

There was plenty of work to do even otherwise, for example the "gathering" part of hunter-gatherer. Heck, even wiping a baby's bottom would have been a lot of work in those days, getting twigs and (shudder) what else to do the job. Fruit and berries would have to be picked, probably even a few medicinal plants, water had to be fetched from the nearby stream, the firewood had to be collected to light the fire, one of the most essential things for survival.
Our ancestral grandmothers also did the hunting of small game [see quoted sources below].

I am also thinking women would have been the ones guarding their precious little ones from scorpions, bugs and predators out in the wild so they would not be dolls sitting there all day and combing their hair and wondering if they needed to lose that extra fat in their thighs so that the dudes in their group would want to father their future children.
However, prehistoric women, just like us, also had a thing for fashion and looking good. They had jewelry and wore primitive short outfits.
Yes, cloth needed to be woven, baskets for carrying the young ones, etc. In fact, hunting for smaller animals with woven nets was a communal activity. Women may have played a very important role "from plant collectors and weavers to hunters and spiritual leaders" as posited in this must-read comprehensive article in Discover Magazine - New Women of the Ice Age.

So, they may very well have contributed to designing and making at least some of those primitive instruments that archeologists stumble on every now and then. Here's an interesting find on this site - World Archaeology.

They may also have very well been involved in fashioning pots and pans because if they were doing most of the cooking and fetching water, they would have to have had a hang of what they needed, no?

Here is an interesting article on National Geographic about the division of labor in the Neanderthal and Paleolithic periods and the possible reasons and benefits.

One particular scientific opinion in the article is quite striking:

'"That women sometimes become successful hunters and men become gatherers means that the universal tendency to divide subsistence labor be gender is not solely the result of innate physical or psychological differences between the sexes; much of it has to be learned," the authors write.'

Here is an enlightening post on Wikipedia about hunter-gatherer societies.

Do read the 'Social and Economic Structure' portion of the article.

'Although most of the gathering is usually done by women, a society in which men completely abstained from gathering easily available plants has yet to be found. Generally women hunt the majority of the small game while men hunt the majority of the large and dangerous game, but there are quite a few documented exceptions to this general pattern.
A study done on the Aeta people of the Philippines states: "About 85% of Philippine Aeta women hunt, and they hunt the same quarry as men. Aeta women hunt in groups and with dogs, and have a 31% success rate as opposed to 17% for men. Their rates are even better when they combine forces with men: mixed hunting groups have a full 41% success rate among the Aeta."^[18]'

If one has the patience, one can go through this thorough academic article about different types of hunter-gatherer societies and the possible reason for different gender roles.

Okay, let's move on from the caveman era in the next post...

Opinions, bias and independent thinking

2013-03-29T19:02:00.000-04:00

This is a post I wrote last year but had not published.

I must confess that I have gotten into a habit online over the last several years, one that has both benefited and harmed me.
I have been a news junkie, an imdb junkie, a Wikipedia junkie of people and, well, a person obsessed with lots of stuff periodically. Therefore, I silently prowl Yahoo, MSN and many other websites. These days, I only do it occasionally to keep things under control.
I can't resist reading the comments either. Yahoo and some other websites have comments that fall in the range of thousands.

Do you have time to kill that you can't seem to know what to do with?
All you have to read is a couple or more articles and before long, your entire afternoon of 3-4 hours is completely wasted on reading hundreds of comments which are mostly different versions of the same recipe of soup.

Why am I so attracted to op-eds and commentary? Maybe it is the avid student speaker/debater in me. Maybe it is because I have had family members in the legal profession or who are intelligent and opinionated with concern for social and political issues. Anyway, this tendency is a double-edged sword.

If you are trying to improve your reading speed or comprehension abilities, this is an excellent choice of activity.

The most fun are those comments that are replies and counter replies. Some are downright rude, some are clever retorts and some are, well, deleted or hidden due to their poor quality or extremely profane language. Sometimes, these hidden comments may have a valid point.

These days, you can give a thumbs up or down on someone else's opinion, just the way you like something on Facebook. I often wonder why some perfectly good replies get thumbs downs. Say, there is an article about religion. You post something to the effect that you don't believe in God and don't get why people believe in some of the irrational ideas that some religious book tells you to. I can bet on this - you will most certainly get a few thumbs downs. Depending on which country the site hails from and the political/religious bent of the majority of its readers, you can get more thumbs ups or thumbs downs.
The same goes if you post something to the effect that God controls everything and that the Bible/Koran/Gita/x-religious-book is the absolute and unquestionable word of God.

If you want to develop a thick skin and a spine, a.k.a. the courage of your convictions, try posting something that you truly believe in that is not exactly mainstream thought yet and get ready for the thumbs downs and worse.

All said and done, the quality of a website's comments does reflect on it. Personally, I have seen some blogs and websites such as MSN Slate where the comments are very articulate and intelligent. One can actually learn something from reading other people's opinions or about their experiences.

Participating in an online discussion is also good practice for developing your debating and overall communication skills, abilities that could come in very handy if you are in any position that requires verbal negotiation.
I remember going in for interviews when I was straight out of college. I have also heard this from my friends who attempted to get into MBA programs. There is a round called Group Discussion or GD for short, after the initial written screening in which you have proved your analytical abilities to the point where you can be considered competent enough to code or understand spreadsheets or pie charts or whatever else your job is all about.
In this round, one has to be able to discuss a topic with people without shouting out the competition or antagonizing them to the point where they corner you later in a dark alley:). Being a timid mouse won't do either. One has to be able to get one's point across eloquently to the rest of the group while weighing the pros and cons of other people's opinions.
Online discussions are good preparation for developing such discussion and negotiating skills.

For me, online forums are a way of sampling the society that I live in. People tend to be more politically incorrect and brash online, maybe because of the anonymity that the Internet offers. When I came to the United States, it was a great way to check out people's opinions on everything ranging from politics and religion to their personal relationships. I also got to know Indians better that way:).
Do you want to get a feel for people in a certain region of the world? Check out their major news outlets and the comments section. Of course, the readers of any publication only represent a small minority in that country so one has to be careful not to generalize.
To be better informed, check out both the conservative and the liberal ones ( know, I have too much time on my hands).

After the Colorado gun shooting incident, I checked out news sites in the US and the Guardian from UK. It is enlightening to see how vastly gun control ideas differ on both sides of the Atlantic.

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Now, for the downside. How many of you watch a movie or read a book without checking out the reviews first? Well, most of us do because we simply do not have the time or energy to plod through an inane movie or lackluster book even if it were given to us for free.
However, we might entirely dismiss a work of art purely because it did not rank high enough on the critics/popular opinion scale. Ditto for restaurants.

Guess what, many artists who are today's legends were yesterday's great-but-not-the-greatest. For something to become a classic, it has to be tested by time. I was reading about William Shakespeare on Wikipedia the other day and learnt that he became even more famous well after his death. This does not mean that he was considered substandard in his times, he had certainly made a name for himself.
The spread of the English language around the world and the popularity of his plays on the stage led to further acclaim over the ages.

Another case in point - the tragic romantic Indian novel, "Devdas" by the famous Bengali author, Sarat Chandra Chattopadhyay, that has been adapted into movies more than once, one of the most famous recent adaptations being the one that had Bollywood stars Shahrukh Khan, Aishwarya Rai and Madhuri Dixit in it.
"Devdas" was published many years after it was written and has achieved an astounding level of popularity in posterity. To its credit, the author did live to see its success with film adaptations even during his lifetime.

A few years ago, I was reading the preface to Emily Bronte's "Wuthering Heights". It is amusing to read contemporary critiques of her work. Many thought that the novel transgressed accepted social standards of morality and propriety. After so many years, we know that it stands in a league of its own.

I wonder though how many more legendary playwrights/authors existed whose work we do not read much these days? If you consider all the languages of the world, there must be a staggering amount of literature that falls under the category of 'timeless classic'. Yet, we may know nothing about it.

It is easy to get biased and praise a work just because it is a classic while overlooking its flaws. As an exercise, take any great classic author or artist and objectively look at their work. What did you feel was lacking as compared to say the work of a lesser known artist that you admire?

This tendency to be part of the crowd is precisely what Nassim Nicholas Taleb talks about in his thought-provoking and ground-breaking book, "The Black Swan". He also warns us of "silent evidence", the great people or works that never made it to the podium of public acknowledgement but are nevertheless priceless in their own right.

This bias extends to virtually any sphere of life. Thanks to the "Please gimme a break" cynics on the Internet comment boards, the media cannot get away that easily with "Sexiest Man in the World", "Most Beautiful Woman in the World", "Greatest Movie of All Times" and other superlative lists.

They say that a lie when told repeatedly, starts to sound like the truth. If we are not aware, we could be easily swayed by the images and words that we are constantly bombarded with.

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Once, I picked up a novel without reading a preface or looking it up online. That was "The Citadel" by A. J. Cronin. It tells the story of an idealistic young English doctor who starts his practice in impoverished villages in Wales, his marriage and the slow corruption of his ideals with the passage of time. When I borrowed this book from my former local library, it was a plain hardcover edition with no pictures or jacket with a synopsis. I decided to read it with an open mind.
Although I must admit I skimmed through some portions or even entirely skipped them, I still enjoyed it. It is a story that is very relevant to every day and age and every society in the world.
The loss of our ideals and the compromises that we make at every stage in our life is a universal human experience.

Summing up, do try to watch a movie or read a book if you like the synopsis of the story. Watch a lesser known play. Go hear a local band play in your bar. See an art exhibition even if you know little about the artist. If you have some free time and if it doesn't cost much money, it is always worthwhile to expand one's horizons and develop critical thinking of one's own, not moulded by the opinions of others.
Admire the natural beauty of your friends and family, even though none of them may ever make it to any popular list. Take pleasure in and compliment them on their talents and accomplishments, be it a painting they made for you, a poem they wrote or a melody that they played proficiently.

While you are at all this, have fun!

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India Musings - I

2013-03-22T17:29:00.000-04:00

In my last post, I mentioned my long trip to India.

What can I say? Going back to your home country dredges up deep emotions that you either never knew existed or just suppressed as you went about your daily life in a foreign country, slaving away at your job and socializing, having fun in general.
This time, the emotions were far more raw.

India, my home of several years, is growing and changing. Just like all other changing places and people, some changes are lovely and others are quite ugly.

On one hand, you see swanky new malls and multiplexes and fast food joints. There is also an aspirational youth, taking up all kinds of study and launching business ventures, making movies, music and art, participating in plays and competitions and all kinds of performances.

On the other hand, there is the ugly side of rising crime and cities that are pushed to the brink with overcrowding and pollution. The crime is truly worrying. The level of trust among people seems to be eroding with attacks on senior citizens right in their homes to the abduction, rape and murder of young children.

A few days ago, as the world celebrated International Women's Day, I was reminded of the braveheart whom a section of the Indian media had named "Nirbhaya" (Sanskrit for 'fearless') - the 23 year old gang rape victim in Delhi who shook the consciousness of the nation. There are countless other victims, some who are far younger and whose cases probably never get the coverage that this got.
While I was in Mumbai, within a span of a month, I read about two major assaults on young women, one of them was a foreigner who was raped in her own flat and the second one ended up losing her life.

Despite the outrage, the protests and some judicial reforms taking place, crimes still continue. There seems to be a tinderbox of anger and frustration that is resulting in crimes even in domestic environments. All the while, as my family members, friends and acquaintances lament the general state of affairs, we all ask the question - Why.

What is it that turns entire groups of men into gangs of rapists who show absolutely no mercy on their hapless victims? Every nation has its fair share of perverts and pedophiles but there are some places where sexual crimes have crossed the realm of explanation from mental illness to a form of social cancer. Social activists, media and politicians, joined by the general public, have all come up with explanations, the most common being the patriarchal culture that has long treated women as sub par.

All this in a country that worships Mother Goddesses, reveres mothers, whose religious epics exhort people to treat all women who are not your wife as your own mothers and sisters.

What is even more alarming is that we hear of more cases of acid attacks and other assaults on young women in the media, perpetuated by rowdies and jilted suitors. In the past, such cases were heard of quite rarely, but somehow, these days, I see more of them spanning newspaper pages and grabbing headlines on primetime television.
Is it because the media is more aggressive in highlighting these incidents or is it the fallout of the increasing gap between the old India where women stayed home and wore traditional outfits and the new India where females are venturing out, making a statement of their own in every possible way?

Nirbhaya's ordeal and death and some other cases have truly left us deeply affected, searching for answers and solutions, and there has been a rise in anger, anger of the right kind that brings about fundamental change in society.

I was recently watching the wonderful movie, "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel", a hopeful comedy about a group of British expats in their golden years, who get a new lease of life and hope after they spend some time in Rajasthan, India. In the movie, the characters talk about all the "colors, light and joy" around and Tom Wilkinson's character makes a memorable statement along the lines of "how people here treat life as a privilege, not as a right".

Alas, in real news, you hear about stories such as these. I feel terrible for these victims. Foreigners who come to India with innocence and hopes of discovering an ancient, mystical, diverse land have not just their dreams shattered, but their psyche, too.

The Indian Paradox -

As I said before, India has been a land of Goddess worshippers. Indian epics consecrate womanhood, motherhood and all things feminine.
However, Indian epics also extol the chastity and fidelity of a woman. Thus, the faithful and beautiful Sita of the Ramayana is made to undergo an 'agnipariksha' (literally translating to "fire test") to prove her chastity after being abducted by Ravana.
Draupadi of the Mahabharata is disrobed publicly as part of a wager and is saved by the grace of Krishna. In the end, her humiliation and violation are avenged by her husbands (yes, husbands - she was in a polyandrous marriage because of the word of her mother-in-law - read more on Wikipedia here).

The Indian Constitution gave equal rights to women from the day of its institution, including the right to vote.
Indian women have held the office of Prime Minister, Chief Minister, Chief Justice, Speaker of the House and even the President.
There are women CEOs, school principals, professors, doctors, lawyers, film directors, singers, actresses and artists.

Yet, many have experienced molestation and violence, particularly the underprivileged sections. Many of the problems that any society faces have their root causes in culture; legislation usually falls in step with the prevailing mindset of the times.
Even with legislation that protects the life and dignity of every individual, there is the gap between the ideals that a society aspires to and the ground reality.

Indians have long lived with their troubles, making do with their own maneuvers and little getting-around tricks, never really challenging the status quo legally or culturally.
True, India had laws punishing rape and molestation and harassment of women was portrayed in cinema and protested against, but matters were only taken into the legal sphere when there was actual rape or severe molestation. Added to the already vitiated atmosphere was the notion that the woman had been "spoilt". In fact, this is the word for "raped" in some Indian languages. English has words like "deflowered", too, for a loss of virginity. Rape is one of the rare crimes where the victim is also blamed.

Girls dressed fashionably, but only after looking around to check the overall culture of the city or village they were in. Eve-teasers (guys who passed comments at girls, sometimes harassing or following them) were generally ignored unless the matter got serious. College authorities, parents and others usually kept an eye on the day-to-day happenings and had things under control.

Groping strangers in public transportation vehicles were usually dealt with loud words, slaps or protests, or instinctive maneuvering to avoid perverts (I now think many women are armed with invisible antennae, a kind of sixth sense that they use to protect themselves in crowds). Other right-minded passengers would usually rally for the victim and help her out.

Harassment was severe in some parts of India, not so much in certain liberal city neighborhoods where girls freely roamed around in jeans or skirts, sometimes even in shorts. Mumbai and Bangalore are typically considered open and relatively "safe" though crimes against women are on the rise there, too. There is no absolutely safe place in India, or for that matter, anywhere in the world.

I have heard stories of young girls whose education has suffered because they were being stalked by some random dude on the street. Girls are often advised to cover up, wear traditional Indian outfits so as to not attract unwanted attention, to not chat much with the opposite sex and stick to their books and classes, be good girls and get married to a suitable guy that their parents approved of, once they completed graduation. Woe unto the poor girl if she was blessed with uncommon good looks!

Even today, dumb politicians make dumb comments such as this - girls wearing skirts attract trouble.

However, I have rarely heard of any of the stalkers being reprimanded.
Can you imagine such things being tolerated in any developed country? Stalking and harassing someone can easily get you a prison term in those places.

As some newspaper columnists have noted, Indian movies openly glorified heroes chasing their objects of affection until they said, "Yes". Real life wannabe Romeos went about whistling and leering at girls and passing lewd comments, without any thought for their feelings and reactions. While I am not saying that movies and television cause people to behave in a certain manner, they do add to the white noise of the culture that silently shapes people's minds.
Note: There is a huge difference at attracting some stares on the street for your voluptuous figure decked in tight clothing and people just ogling, sometimes just because you are dressed differently.
There is a difference between a harmless sexual look and threatening lechery and almost every girl understands that on a deep level.

Today, many Indians blame Bollywood for its vulgarity and item numbers featuring skimpily clad dancers. They feel it is contributing to fueling passions that endanger women. However, most Indians recognize that it is the woefully slow law and order mechanism and corruption in government that have led to this state of affairs. Added to it is the deeply patriarchal culture where women are worshipped on one hand and made to pay dowry on the other hand, preserve their chastity and hold up the honor of the family.

Unlike common myths, all Indians do not abort female fetuses or pay hefty dowries or, gasp, burn widows. India has a multitude of ethnicities based on language and within those are castes and communities. Different groups have differing customs and some are more patriarchal than others.
What is probably a common thread running through all of them is a conservatism - no-sex-before-marriage, respect-for-one's-elders and following the traditions of the family.

Somehow, in walking the tightrope between preserving its unique cultural identity and embracing external ideas, India is facing the loss of compassion within. There is a lot of work to be done, by every family and every individual, to cultivate respect for another human's life and dignity.
Most Indians do a sterling job of parenting and imparting values to their children but many families struggle with alcoholism, abuse, poverty or simply neglect from parents who may not be that poor.

What is a sign of hope is that Indians are standing up and fighting for their country, their future and the safety and life of everyone who sets foot on this ancient land.
New laws are being framed against child abuse and assault, questions are being asked very publicly and people are taking matters to the police and the courts.
One day, I dream of an India where people can just be who they are, without being brutalized or violated, where children and women can move about freely without their innocence being robbed and where compassion rules the day.

To paraphrase Martin Luther King Jr., we all have a dream...

Back in 2013

2013-02-12T14:44:00.000-05:00

Dear readers,

I am back online in 2013.

I was away in India for close to three months and have been busy getting back on track since then. I have lots to share and will do so in the coming weeks.

Ciao!

Starving artists, fame and luck

2012-10-15T21:21:00.000-04:00

"Grub", penned by Elise Blackwell, is the novel that I recently finished reading. It is a very engrossing and touching tale of struggling writers - wannabe celebrity authors and the pure artists who would rather die in obscurity and penury than write something below their dignity to just pander to the masses.

Intertwined in all this is, of course, their love lives. However, the novel also explores the publishing business, the complicated mindset of editors and publishers and how their ideas, preferences and tastes could literally make or break a budding writer.

Many people have said that the Internet is one of the most democratic media ever. Just take a case of this blog that you are just reading. I am able to air my thoughts freely for free, without any fear of censure or even having a career as a writer. I am happy that I can inform and entertain a few of you who care to set aside the time to read my rants and reflections. For that, I am truly thankful.

Some people even publish books online. It is a risk in some ways because, I feel:

1. Unless you have a well-established readership and some sort of credibility online, your material could get plagiarized and no one would notice. I am not sure how this works under the Creative Commons License and such.

Sharing general ideas on a subject while linking to other relevant websites, blogs and sources is one thing. Writing an original piece of fiction is quite another.

2. Money - How does one market something online? Some people have posted free content online and then requested donations, if their readers are willing and able. Sometimes, they release books chapter by chapter and all a reader has to do is pay online with a credit/debit card and download the content.

Check out puttylike.com for an example.

Online pricing can be far less than that for a paperback or hardback as publishing costs on paper and the distribution fee, not to mention, the salary overheads of those who work in publishing, are all added to the cost of the book.

Even with that, you have to find a way to make your work visible to people online. Not all good writers would be good marketers.

Imagine the number of good writers who never found a publisher for their initial work, got discouraged and just gave up on their dreams of becoming a published author. Then, reality bites in the form of rent/mortgage to pay, families to feed and clothes to wear. Some people can manage a day job and continue to toil away at their passions on the side.

However, many people, particularly those who have entered the married-with-kids phase (even without kids has its complications), time is a real constraint. Commuting to and from work, a full time job, housework or cooking in the evenings, socializing and outings on the weekends, etc. take up almost all of one's energy and time. And, if you happen to have a soft spot for your TV or the vast spider trap known as the World Wide Web, you probably have little or no time left for hobbies.
Days roll into weeks, weeks into months and you wonder, "Is it the end of summer already?" Maybe you look at a photo album that is just two or three years old and think of how much time has flown by.

Maybe that is the reason many people don't "do what they love". Despite the mantra circulating on the Internet and in popular culture, most cannot find the courage to quit a lifestyle of security and take a giant leap into the unknown, especially if they have dependents. You have to build up a foundation first before you make your hobby into a monetary pursuit, whether it means taking acting or piano classes on weekends, writing late in the evening or volunteering at a charity you always wanted to work for full time.

I have realized this all the more as I grow older, with all the constraints of full time employment, social life and maintaining the bare minimum of domesticity.

One of my favorite bloggers, the author of the Unlost, has a lovely post on this subject. Do check it out.

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The book also raised the question of sticking to the high road of art for art's sake in a pure, unselfish way, expressing the creator's sentiments in their unvarnished form that will probably be appreciated only by a select few, versus trying to appeal to the masses, playing to the gallery. There is the middle ground where the artist tries to keep his/her soul intact while trying to charm the audience.

Most forms of popular entertainment try to walk this tightrope. Take Hollywood for example. While the industry makes movies such as the "Mission Impossible" and "American Pie" series, it also churns out numerous romantic comedies known condescendingly as chick-flicks. Then there are the truly serious and arty movies, sometimes made by studios and sometimes by independent film makers, which are not exactly mega crowd pullers. The Oscars are often awarded to movies and roles that the common public doesn't watch until the awards are announced or in the season preceding them.

"Finding Neverland", "The Reader", "The Good Shepherd", "Becoming Jane", "Atonement" and "A Dangerous Method" are some of the movies that I have seen in the last few years, which had both solid performances and stellar storytelling. Some of them probably were not as widely seen during a theatrical release as the Superman, Spiderman, Batman kind of movies.

There are some movies that touch one's heart and make it sing and still manage to garner both public adulation and critical acclaim. "Titanic", "Harry Potter" and "The Dark Knight" are some such films, in my opinion.

The same applies to other creative fields such as writing or music.

There is also an element of snobbery that comes with the territory. The reader who devours classics and discusses Ernest Hemingway, Graham Greene, Charles Dickens and William Shakespeare will probably never be caught dead with a (gasp)"chick-flick". Heck, even "Pride and Prejudice" may be below his standards.
On the other hand, a person who loves to read anything and everything can be intimidated by the prose of Shakespeare or Thomas Hardy.

Some listeners may think of rap, hip-hop and even many pop songs to be populist and not worth their highly refined ears, confining themselves to classical and certain rock bands only. (I don't know of such types personally but I am guessing that it is a fair statement, considering the number of folks who tout the virtues of art films over mainstream cinema).

There is a fine line between tasteful discernment and pure snobbery.

I think I have decided to go with whatever touches my heart. There are popular films, books and songs that just flit by, leaving no lasting memory or making you vibrate with any sort of emotion other than temporary pleasure. Some popular entertainment may actually leave you with a headache and deep regret over hours of wasted time:).
However, there are several simple works of art that are composed with common words, sounds and mundane, everyday tidbits that truly get to your soul. Many of these are the works of lesser known artists. Popular movies and songs often lift you up out of a funk and look at the lighter, brighter side of life.
It is also quite possible that, sometimes, one just does not "get" a classic. Case in point - try reading Ernest Hemingway's "The Old Man and the Sea". It is not everyone's cup of tea regardless of its literary merits.
For those who are familiar with Indian classical music, try listening to the notes of a Carnatic or Hindustani 'raga' (for my non-Indian readers, Carnatic and Hindustani are the two streams of Indian classical music, a 'raga' is a set of musical notes that can be used in different permutations to create tunes that belong to the same family). If you haven't developed a taste for classical music, you may probably switch to your iPod playlist, frantically searching for the top hits.

I myself face this tightrope as a blogger. If you have been following this blog for some time, you must have noticed that this is not devoted to any particular theme.

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Another book based on the role of chance/luck/fate in success is Nassim Nicholas Taleb's "The Black Swan". No, this has nothing to do with the movie for which Natalie Portman won the Oscar. It is an excellent film, no doubt, but this book is about highly improbable events that leave a lasting impact on society.
Such events cannot be predicted. He talks about two areas, Mediocristan and Extremistan. Art, literature, scientific research all fall under Extremistan where one book or work that gets the right publicity at the right time, can eclipse many other equally good works. These are professions that have a kind of "winner-takes-all" setup though I personally believe that the term "winner" should not be strictly restricted to winners of prizes, be it the Nobel or Grammy or Oscar.

Initial publicity can lead to more work. If the subsequent work is also acclaimed, the artist's reputation further solidifies, thus completing a virtuous cycle.

The only thing an artist can do, just like anyone else anywhere, is just focus on his/her work and not worry about the outcomes. As it is said in the Bhagavad Gita (rough translation), one of the holiest books of the Hindus,"You do not have the right to the fruits of your labor" (see Wikipedia for more results).

And that is easier said than done.

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Note: All movie links point to imdb.com and book links point to Amazon.com and the rest to Wikipedia.org.
Many thanks to all these web sites.

Ganesh Chaturthi, astrology, fate and free will

2012-09-21T21:48:00.000-04:00

Lately, I have been reading a lot on astrology, particularly Western astrology. Coming from India, the land of mysticism, spirituality and practices such as yoga, astrology is a subject that is not far removed from the important matters in life.

For example, September 19, 2012 was Ganesh Chaturthi, the birthday of the elephant-headed deity of Hindus, Ganesha or Ganpati as he is popularly known. Each year in Mumbai, there are ten day celebrations with gigantic idols being brought into various city neighborhoods amidst great pomp and street revelry. Massive 'mandaps' (temporary tent-like structures erected for ceremonies and festivities) are decorated with themes, sometimes featuring tableaus of Indian religious tales and even contemporary social issues.

I miss the festivities in India, being far away here in America. My memories of the various Ganesh festivals of my childhood and youth are not perfectly photographic, but the gist remains.
For ten days, the entire vicinity of the abode of the Ganesha idol would be agog with activity, music blaring from the speakers, local competitions and prizes and an air of gaiety that would last for typically ten days.
At the end of this festive period, all the idols would be taken for immersion to the nearest water body, be it a lake or the sea. Apart from the community festivities, individual families would have their own small Ganesha idols and take them for immersion on one of the following days: second, fifth, seventh or tenth.
Some people say that the bringing of the Ganesha idol into the community and then immersing it is symbolic of birth and death, finally our bodies merge into dust.

Indian festivals follow the lunar calendar. Therefore, Ganesh Chaturthi falls on the fourth day of the waxing phase of the moon in a particular month. The word 'Chaturthi' itself refers to the fourth day of the lunar fortnight (not sure about the origin, but the word 'char' pronounced in the same way as the first four letters in 'charcoal', means 'four').
The day of this festival, like all other festivals, corresponds to the moon being in a particular zodiac sign within certain degrees. This is called a 'nakshatra'. A 'nakshatra' also refers to a particular star or constellation. Please read the above-linked Wikipedia article or sources on Vedic astrology for more information. The 12 signs of the zodiac are further divided into 27 nakshatras. Ganesh Chaturthi falls under the 'nakshatra' of 'Svathi', with the moon in Libra.

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In arranged marriages, where the parents seek matrimonial alliances for their children, compatible horoscopes are extremely important for the matter to even proceed into the phase of boy-meets-girl.

Note to non-Indian readers: Arranged marriages are not forced marriages. In many cases, particularly in urban areas, the prospective groom and bride are introduced by family members and typically at least communicate over the phone or Internet for several months before tying the knot.
In liberal families, they even go out and date. There are, of course, several other cases where people often marry the first person they are set up with because they have zero relationship experience and experience family pressure to settle down with the 'best' available match.

Surprisingly, on visiting certain Western astrology forums, many folks were comparing their charts to ex-boyfriends and husbands, crushes and current romantic partners, drawing up synastry points and karmic aspects, etc.

The difference, I think, is in the way people approach relationships in the West and places like India. I have never heard of anyone in the US or in European countries starting to date someone only after vetting their astrological compatibility. In India, at least in the case of many arranged marriages, that is precisely the approach.

I am starting to think of astrological charts being a sort of ancient personality analysis. I am not asserting that astrology is true or false, just the reflections that it has induced in me.
Sites such as eHarmony claim to match personalities and bring up profiles of suitable matches, an approach that is not dissimilar to filtering out astrologically incompatible matches.

Western and Indian astrology follow different zodiac systems, so your Sun and Moon signs may be different in each system. The interpretation of charts is different in each system, too.

I have personally noticed that many Western astrology sites, particularly those managed by individuals, tend to be encouraging and offer readings based on potential, not predicting destinies. There are some who merely list individual characteristics and relationship potential in a kind of inflexible manner.

On the other hand, many Indian (Vedic) astrology sites offer hard predictions related to fame, career, family, marriage, etc.

The cultures of the East and the West are seen reflected in the astrology readings and predictions, too.
An Indian site may offer advice to help solve marital issues whereas a Western site may ask you if you want to stay in or leave the relationship.

Even if one believes in astrology, I think one should check out an astrologer's views on marriage, relationships, etc. For example, if someone tells you that you are compatible with person X, what does that mean exactly? A relationship that is good on paper in the bedroom may still be lacking in emotional sensitivity and intellectual understanding. Over a period of time, the other incompatibilities may start eating into the good areas, too.

A person's individual personality, family background and education all influence his/her capacity to relate to other people. I wonder if synastry aspects alone would do any good if a person is not truly committed to marriage.

The same points apply to career, too. Your parents determine your genes while your education and exposure to opportunities determine your native and developed mental faculties and talents.
Your own efforts, desires, focus and attitude determine how far you can actually go in life. There is an unknown factor though and that is luck/the hand of God/fate/karma. Does astrology point to this unknown? I don't know.

Why do some people become more famous and beloved than others, even if their peers are hardworking and talented, too? Why do some people seem contented with perfectly ordinary lives? Even siblings raised in the same environment are not similar in this respect.

Do addiction, criminal behavior and psychological disorders have a fatalistic component?

Society has always struggled to balance the viewpoints of individual free will against preordained destiny. Books on success in pretty much anything, be it relationships to career and life in general, focus on individual effort. Work hard for your dreams, your marriage, ... fill in the blanks and you shall have it.

This is, of course, a very inspiring message and absolutely necessary. If I treat my partner with indifference, how well will that relationship be? If I don't study hard for my exams, how can I hope to score highly? If I don't work productively and aspire to something, I may fritter away precious years in my career.

However, there is no guarantee of satisfaction or happiness by merely toiling away. Relationships have aspects such as chemistry, long term compatibility and individual viewpoints and desires gradually diverging over time due to factors that are beyond one person's control.
Likewise, some people seem to catch all the right opportunities and get noticed, helping them reach the very top of their field, whereas some of their peers fade into the unknown, even if they worked really hard.

I look at astrology charts for introspection and finding out what my interests and desires may be. It is good to derive inspiration from the positive aspects in it, for example, if my chart points to a great imagination and I find it to be true in my past, I should try to capitalize on it.
Sometimes, chart reading may point me to latent talents that I never explored.

Scientists routinely dismiss astrology as weird superstition. However, I wonder if there is something more to it than we know. I admit there is a heavy element of fatalism in many astrological profiles and forecasts.
What if the position of the stars is more indicative of events rather than the cause of them? I mean -maybe a certain planetary configuration is not going to get you fired from your job or wreck your married life, but is merely an external indicator of things that you already know such as a crappy job or relationship.

I have often wondered how ancient astrologers were able to study concepts such as houses, which constellation the moon is in, how some planets move slower than the others, what constellation is just above the horizon, which planet is going to enter a particular constellation years from now, which constellation an eclipse is going to fall in and when, etc. There is quite a bit of mathematics involved. This was all done in an age where there were no fancy telescopes, satellites, space shuttles or computers.

Astrology, in its benign form, is mathematics mixed with mysticism, star gazing combined with psyche gazing.

However, like any other field, it is not free from dogma. For example, a statement that person X born under sun sign or moon sign Y has certain characteristics and may or may not be famous/successful, should be subjected to scrutiny. People should be asking - who defined the characteristics for each zodiac sign? How many scientific studies done in today's day and age can validate these points?

This brings us to the question of free will.

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There is a temple in the southern state of India, Tamil Nadu, that houses manuscripts based on an ancient form of fortune-telling in India, called 'naadi jyosiyam'; the word 'jyosiyam' means 'astrology'. Check out this fascinating article on Wikipedia about 'nadi astrology'.

These are ancient documents that apparently have the details of each person ever born on this planet, with their destinies, too. A couple of people in my circle of friends and acquaintances have visited this place and were blown away by the details that the person reading their charts, was able to tell them just by knowing very few things about them such as their full name. They were even told things about their future that eventually manifested.

Legend has it that the 'rishi' (sage), Agastya, wrote down these predictions thousands of years ago.

Elsewhere in Europe in the 16th century, Nostradamus is reputed to have predicted cataclysmic events.
In far recent times, there was a famous psychic in the United States called Edgar Cayce, who was able to make starting predictions about both individuals and world events.

People still consult psychics to gain insights about themselves, their relationships and the future.

Personally, I don't think I would want to know my future because the uncertainty and opportunity that life presents are what makes it fun. I also feel that I may get biased and change my behavior subconsciously to match these predictions, thus making them self-fulfilling prophecies.
And, last but not the least, it seems extremely unfair that the game has been fixed before it has even begun.

If my memory serves me right, I once had a mild argument with one of my school teachers. She said that God already knows your destiny. I questioned that because I felt that this line of thought completely negates everything about free will and individual responsibility. Why then should criminals be punished? What then is the point of sin, punishment and karma?

The Universe is full of mysteries. We should do everything we can to rise to our best but have the humility to accept that we don't know everything.

There is a famous prayer that comes to mind:

"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can and
Wisdom to know the difference."

Whether one believes in God or not, the last line seems to be as hard as or even harder than the first two - wisdom.

Peace.

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Idols and distant objects of affection

2012-09-19T02:28:00.001-04:00

There are great loves and then there are infatuations, the unrequited loves and the loves that exist merely in our imagination. The objects of our affection may be distant and may probably never even get to know us.

Even those loves have a potential to transform us, release our potential and make something out of our lives.
I was watching the movie, "Julie and Julia" the other day where a young woman, Julie Powell, decides to cook all the 524 recipes from the famous TV personality and chef, Julia Child's book, "Mastering the Art of French Cooking".

Spoiler alert: The real Julia Child is not impressed with her efforts after Julie gains acclaim through her blog in which she documents her daily efforts. In fact, her idol is offended. Julie is hurt at this reaction but, the bottom line is, her inspiration served a purpose, to fire her up and dare a task outside her comfort zone. It helped unleash her own creativity and achieve something useful in her life.

Idols can inspire and motivate us to reach for the stars. Even if our admiration and adoration are never reciprocated, we can be rest assured that our affections were not in vain.

There is a story in the Indian epic, the Mahabharata, about a young boy called Ekalavya. He was a great admirer of the sage Dronacharya (this name is a combination of Drona, the name and Acharya, which means sage), who instructed princes of his day in archery.

Every day, Ekalavya would practice his shots in front of an idol of Dronacharya. He became an expert in the course of time. When Dronacharya finally discovers his secret admirer and his proficiency, he asks him for a 'dakshina' (a fee) - Ekalavya's thumb, which would effectively reduce his archery skills considerably. This was to ensure that no one would surpass his favorite royal pupils. Courtesy of Wikipedia, there is another reason Drona supposedly asked for such an outrageous fee - he was angered that Ekalavya had stolen his education and not obtained it the right way.
Ekalavya gladly gives his thumb to Drona. I know, it is all very unfair and this was way back in the ages when emancipation of the lower castes had not yet occurred.

In my opinion and that of many others, Ekalavya emerges as a true hero and an ideal disciple in this story. Some parents would probably lament - if only students these days had the motivation and determination of Ekalavya...

That is the power of devotion, of unconditional affection and respect.

In a more spiritual story that had a happy ending, the medieval saint Mirabai of India, fell in love with Lord Krishna, the flute-playing, cowherd charmer deity of Hindus. Yes, the deity who was no longer present physically on this planet. She composed songs of ecstasy for her beloved, danced to the tune of them, inspiring throngs with her 'bhakti' (devotion). This was scandalous for a young, married woman in India of those days but, fortunately for her, she had a sympathetic husband. Finally, she is supposed to have merged into the Divine, thus achieving union with her Beloved.

Mira is now celebrated as a Saint (Mirabai is again a combination of the name Mira and the suffix, Bai).

The object of one's affection can be a huge inspiration to create, write, paint, excel, achieve and even emulate qualities of humility, grace and courage. Your favorite celebrity crush can actually do you a lot of good:).

This post is dedicated to one of my celebrity crushes, someone I hold in awe and respect and secretly hope to meet someday:).

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Nationality - Olympics and representation

2012-08-13T19:24:00.001-04:00

Note to readers: Spelling conforms to UK English. I am going back to my pre-US days and since the Games are being hosted by London, it is a nod to the mother country of the English language.

Not that there is any law stopping me from using whatever version of English I please, US, UK, Australian or even Hinglish (Hindi mixed with English) or, for that matter, pig Latin. Just thinking, I am going to try pig Latin one day and give you readers the legend, it will be like an encrypted message, ha ha.

There are always some heavyweights when it comes to international sports. Countries such as the United States, China, Japan, Russia, Australia and the United Kingdom along with some European countries such as France and Germany, always come out on tops in the overall medal tally.

As a native born Indian, I usually share the common lament of my compatriots: When, oh when, are we going to see our tricolour fluttering at the medal ceremony and hear "Jana Gana Mana" being played?

To their credit, Indians did win a handful of medals this time. And I wholeheartedly congratulate our athletes, Vijay Kumar, Yogeshwar Dutt, Sushil Kumar and Saina Nehwal for keeping our 'jhanda/kodi' ('jhanda' - meaning flag in Hindi, 'kodi' meaning flag in Tamil) flying high. Check out this slideshow on Indian medal winners at this year's Olympics on India Today.

I really did not want to get into whining mode. Honestly. I am not going to whine about how our government doesn't do enough, how our parents don't encourage us to pursue sports, blah, blah, sniffle. This post is not about one particular country. It is, in fact, quite the opposite. It is about how many nations participate in the making of a champion or a series of winners.

Training away from home, or at home with foreign help -

Take the example of the 10, 000 metres winner, Mo Farah. He was born in Somalia, emigrated to the UK when he was about eight and trained in Portland, Oregon, United States with one of America's famous long distance running and marathon coaches, Alberto Salazar. His training partner, the American, Galen Rupp, took home the silver medal. Isn't that a sweet victory for the trio of coach and pupils?

To add to this pinnacle of achievement, Mo Farah also took home the gold for the 5, 000 metres.

I found this article on the British newspaper site, the Telegraph, about how his move to the US transformed his athletic career.

[Incidentally, Portland, Oregon was my residence of a few years and still is a place I call home in my heart. It is a verdant green city surrounded by the snow capped Cascades, forests, trails and waterfalls and gets a lot of rain, just like the British Isles.
The flag bearer of the US Olympic team at the opening ceremony in London, the fencer, Mariel Zagunis is from Beaverton, part of the Portland metro area, too, so that makes me doubly proud.]

Mo Farah's win is a prime example of a product of multiple nationalities. This goes not only for athletes who represent their home country but train abroad but also those who train at home with foreign coaches.

CNN had a few inspiring stories of athletes from lesser privileged backgrounds and impoverished nations, who were helped by either emigrating to a developed nation or help from athletes of well-to-do nations.
The runner who was born in Sudan but who trains in and represents the US, Lopez Lomong, and this Rwandan mountain bike rider, Adrien Niyonshuti, featured on CNN's site, are two such respective examples.

Then, there is the fabled Chinese 16-year-old swimmer, Ye Shiwen, who apparently had a lower split time in the last 50 metres of her 400 metre swimming race than many male greats. She trained in Australia.

Major International Sports

Cricket
In recent years, India, with its mad craze for the game of cricket, had its national team coached by top notch former players from abroad such as Australians, John Wright and Greg Chappell. India's World Cup winning team of 2011 was coached by Gary Kirsten of South Africa. Many top Indian players have honed their skills on the green fields of English county cricket grounds, as mentioned in this article on Indian Express.

Basketball
There are many athletes who have benefited from training and competing in the US. European and Asian basketball players such as Rudy Fernandez who played for Spain and Yao Ming who has represented China, have been members of NBA teams in the US.

Soccer
Similarly, many international soccer players are members of top European leagues, helping them to compete with and learn from the best in the world.

Sponsorship -

Many athletes are sponsored by multinational companies such as Coca Cola, Pepsi, Adidas and Nike, who by their very definition owe their roots to one country but subsequent reach to many.

Immigration -

If you noticed, there is quite a bit of racial diversity in the delegations of the United States, the United Kingdom and Canada, countries that typically attract a lot of immigrants from Asia, Africa and other European countries.

The US gymnastics team is the quintessential immigrant success story. I probably don't need to emphasize why I picked this, gymnastics nut as I am:) but there is another reason. Unlike basketball or tennis, gymnastics was not traditionally a US-dominated sport. Sure, America has a tradition of acrobatics, too.
However, utter the word gymnastics, and one would always be reminded of Russian and Romanian girls and guys, with their pointy toes and toned, graceful bodies like ballet dancers. The former USSR, Romania and some of the other Eastern European countries, along with China and Japan, were the leaders on the international gymnastics stage. Even today, Russia dominates events such as rhythmic gymnastics, just check out these London 2012 results on BBC.
Here is a great piece on Russian gymnasts in Splice Today.

In the 80s and 90s, this slowly started to change. Today, the Americans are a force to reckon with and it is very rare to not see the Stars and Stripes being raised at a gymnastics medal ceremony.

This is the site of USA Gymnastics with records of champions from the revival of the modern Olympic Games until now.

Here is a very informative slideshow on the history of US gymnastics on the bleacher report. I learnt that Americans did win medals at international events in the early 1900s but lost out later to European countries, Japan and China.

If you watched the drama of the women's balance beam final with Aly Raisman of the US initially being pipped to the bronze by Catalina Ponor of Romania, you might have noticed a certain grey-haired gentleman rise up in the stands, asking Aly's coach to appeal the decision.
There was a subsequent appeal and after re-evaluation by the judges, the bronze was awarded to Aly.

That distinguished gentleman was Bela Karolyi and his wife, Marta Karolyi, was sitting right next to him. Bela and Marta Karolyi are the famous coaches of champions past and present, one of whom happens to be the icon, Nadia Comaneci, the first woman to score a perfect 10, the shining star of the 1976 Montreal Olympics. This couple defected to the US from the Romania before the fall of communism. Marta Karolyi was the Team Co-ordinator for the US this time.

Nastia Liukin, the Beijing Olympics individual all-round champion, was born in Russia to a father and mother who were both gymnastics champions. They emigrated to the US when Nastia was a little girl and the US got a gem of an immigrant family. The rest, as they say, is history.

Then there is Liang Chow. This is the coach of Shawn Johnson, the silver medalist in the individual all round final of the women's artistic gymnastics event in Beijing four years ago.
This year, he is the proud coach of the gold medalist in the women's individual all-round final, Gabrielle Douglas, known more famously as Gabby Douglas. She made history as the first African-American woman to win the title. I haven't seen any non-Caucasian win it before.

Liang Chow represented China as a world class medal-winning gymnast before emigrating to the US. Many former champion gymnasts such as Daniela Silivas and Nadia Comaneci of Romania and Svetlana Boginskaya of the former USSR have moved to the US, too.

The United States is not the only one to benefit from immigration. Among the young, pony-tailed, teeny-bopper brigade of gymnasts in London, there was a veteran, Oksana Chusovitina. This woman is 37 years old, a gnarled old tree in the world of gymnastics where even 25 is considered over the hill. She is one of the two older gymnasts in competition in this Olympiad.
She managed to surprise us all with her somersaults and flips. Her story is remarkable not only because of her age. Her unique and trying circumstances have contributed to a life full of twists and turns, just like her routine. [Do read this column on Slate about the perils and triumphs of gymnastics and the book, "Little Girls in Pretty Boxes". I got the link for the older gymnasts from the Slate article.]

Oksana originally represented the USSR when she was a young girl. After the Soviet Union collapsed, she performed for Uzbekistan. Unfortunately, her son was diagnosed with leukaemia and the quest for his treatment landed her in Germany, her current home. She now sports the German team colours. At this age, she still made it to the event finals of the vault. Oksana is truly an example of humans being parts of different countries and being a positive contributor to every one of them.

I heard of the American footwear giant, Nike's programme to encourage basketball at the grassroots level in China. [Nike is from Portland, Oregon, too, woo hoo!]. Read this article on Oregon Business.

I am just thinking, may we see a LeBron James or Shaquille O'Neal coaching a budding Indian basketball team some day? Or a Russian coaching an Indonesian gymnastics team? It would be great to see more variety, more healthy competition in every sport.
The world would be a fitter place with more inspired youngsters both physically and mentally.

Many thanks to all the original sources I have linked to.

Reflections on the Olympics, London 2012

2012-08-08T21:59:00.002-04:00

Note to readers: This post conforms to spelling according to UK English rules. Just thought I'd go back to my pre-US days and since the Games are being hosted by London, this is a nod to the British:).

For the past ten or so days, I have been glued to the television for several hours, watching NBC's telecast of the London Olympics of 2012.

The Olympics and also the Asian and the Commonwealth Games were part of my growing up years. I have always been fascinated by the parade of virtually all the nations on this earth, and all the events with the best of each country pitted against each other.

The Olympics are, of course, the king of all sports events, in my humble opinion. This is THE most varied, best known, most prestigious sporting event there is. It is a truly international pageant.

It is one of those rare occasions where even people who normally don't care much for sports sit and watch even lesser known events such as water polo, judo and synchronised swimming. And, I wait with bated breath for my favourite event, gymnastics.
If you have read my previous posts, you might be aware that I am a huge fan of the gymnast, Nadia Comaneci, even though she had retired by the time I was old enough to even comprehend what the Olympics meant. I had watched a four-part movie about her life when I was in school and was completely blown over. I scribbled doodles of gymnasts on random scraps of paper, nursing the impossible dream that I would be one, too:). Ah, the imagination of a child!

The names of various past gymnasts and athletes from other disciplines from countries such as Romania, Ethiopia, Ukraine and China still ring a bell in my head, though I can't utter a single word in any of their languages. Some of these athletes are Svetlana Khorkina (Gymnastics, Russia), Ecatrina Szabo (Gymnastics, Romania), Daniela Silivas (Gymnastics, Romania), Carly Patterson (Gymnastics, USA), Nastia Liukin and Shawn Johnson (Gymnastics, USA), Haile Gebrselassie (Long distance running, Track and Field, Ethiopia), Sergey Bubka (Pole Vault, Ukraine), Wu Minxia (Diving, China), Ian Thorpe (Swimming, Australia) and Dara Torres (Swimming, USA). Stars such as the legendary swimmer and Olympic record holder for the most medals, Michael Phelps of the US and the runner, Usain Bolt of Jamaica will be remembered and will continue to inspire for years to come.

I would (and still do) eagerly wait for events such as gymnastics, swimming, diving and synchronised swimming. The Games are a place where you can savour the breadth and beauty of human diversity, hearing obscure, normally unpronounceable names from Latvia to Laos, Ecuador to Ethiopia, and the United States to the United Arab Emirates. It is one common ground to see the multicoloured flags of so many nations and also get to know the new countries that have recently been born.

As one of my friends said, you also get to see the people from every corner of this planet, what they look like and sometimes even hear a smattering of their languages.

The opening ceremony was a delight for history and literature buffs featuring scenes from the Industrial Revolution, the pre-Industrial pastoral lifestyle, the various literary characters from Harry Potter to Alice in Wonderland and all that make Britain a great contributor to humanity.
Some comparisons to the spectacular show that the Chinese put up about four years ago at Beijing did pop up in my circle, but, I think each country showed us something unique, their culture and history, beautiful people and garments, dance and music.

The highlight of the evening was, of course, the James Bond clip, featuring Queen Elizabeth II with the actor Daniel Craig, and then the Queen jumping off a helicopter above the actual Olympic stadium:) (even if it was a stunt double who did the actual jump). I have watched many opening and closing ceremonies, full of pomp and colour and co-ordinated dances, but, wow! This particular sequence will be probably etched in my memory for years to come.
Dances and costumes, parades and visual effects fade from memory but characters like Bond and a very formal, famous royal, known for her reserve, performing such a daring act, stay much longer.
Danny Boyle, the well known director of movies such as "Slumdog Millionaire", pulled off a commendable feat.

Now that the Games will soon come to a close, there will be withdrawal symptoms for sure. The motto "Inspire a Generation" does hold true, I believe. Along with my friends and family, I have been inspired to work out, stretch, get fit and accomplish my goals. If an event can get you off the couch and do something, it is well worth the time, money and media coverage.

Colorado shootings - Senseless violence and Guns

2012-08-02T22:03:00.000-04:00

About two weeks ago, there was a terrible tragedy in Aurora, Colorado, as a lone gunman opened fire at a midnight screening of "The Dark Knight Rises", in the wee hours of 20th July, 2012, killing about 14 people and severely wounding several others.

My condolences and prayers towards the families of those affected, including that of the perpetrator.
May the souls of those who perished, rest in peace.

I read several Internet comments for and against gun control by impassioned people who are rightly outraged. Here is an article on Yahoo honoring the victims. There are tons of comments.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with the US and its laws, there is a certain part of the US Bill of Rights that is related to this discussion. It is the Second Amendment to the Bill of Rights that allows citizens to bear arms for self-defense.

Overall, the sentiment does seem to lean towards the idea that such crimes cannot totally be prevented as crazy people and criminals who are hell bent on breaking the law, always manage to get hold of weapons, legally or otherwise.

Gun advocates say that if common folks are always armed, there will always be some sane, concerned citizen in a crowd of unfortunate victims, who might fire at such perpetrators and prevent them from unleashing their insanity on the rest. That does seem like a wholly plausible line of defense.

On the other hand, proponents of gun control say that as long as guns are freely available, the chances of such crimes occurring are very high with a resulting high number of casualties. This is also true.

Gun advocates further argue that if guns were banned, violent criminals would always find other means such as knives, explosives, etc. So should we start banning knives? Given the worldwide newspaper accounts of people being stabbed every now and then by loved ones or strangers, knives are a very lethal weapon, too.

Their opponents say that there is no way a knife can be used to kill so many people at a time. I have to agree with the opponents on this one.

Extent of damage
A knife can cause as much damage as a gun or worse when held at close range. When it comes to operating in a crowd though, the situation changes completely.
Unless the attacker happens to be some highly skilled medieval-era-type warrior that can throw an entire array of knives at moving targets in quick succession with a high level of precision, the chances of killing many people in a crowd, who are running helter skelter, are extremely low.

Just take a look at history. How did some nations and cultures manage to subjugate others on the battlefield? Superior warfare technology was one of the many factors. Of course, the history of colonialism and world wars is far more complex with lots of intrigue, backstabbing, infighting, spying and politics at its Machiavellian best.
However, advanced guns and modern artillery did offer some countries significant advantages over their counterparts.

Do you think an army of aboriginals/natives with poisonous arrows and spears would ever be able to compete against an army with sophisticated machine guns and cannons? Unless the army with guns were to be vastly outnumbered and showered with a sky full of arrows, it is extremely improbable.
There are some exceptions when native armies have outnumbered and conquered invaders largely with their traditional weapons but the reasons were better organization, formation and greater numbers as seen in this very informative Wikipedia article about the battle between the British and the Zulu warriors. Another related article is the armed Maji Maji rebellion in Tanzania.

Physics supports bullets far more than arrows.

When a large weapon such as a spear is thrown at a target, it is visible enough to be thwarted or avoided if seen in proper light. Also, there is a limit to the speed with which a human being can hurl any weapon with his/her bare hands. A bullet, on the other hand, is tiny and travels so fast that there is not much time to react. What the bullet lacks in mass, it makes up several times in its velocity, hence the total momentum of impact is enough to cause substantial damage.
And, if it is a series of bullets in a sophisticated and powerful gun, the chances of hitting targets at close range are very high with not much human body power needed.

Simply put, the number of probable casualties that can be inflicted with a gun in a short period of time, is significantly higher than with a knife or some other common weapon.

Unintentional casualties
There is another problem with guns. Even if one were to keep a gun under lock and key in one's house, if a child were to accidentally get hold of it and pull the trigger, a terrible tragedy could occur. A knife, unless used to stab someone deliberately, causes cuts and deep wounds at the worst. A bullet, if it hits someone in a vital region at close range, can kill almost instantaneously.

Then, there are issues with irresponsible adults. Overreaction to perceived threats can cause loss of innocent lives. A perfect example is the recent Trayvon Martin case in Florida and the resulting uproar over "Stand Your Ground" laws. Check out this article in The Week for details about the case. There are some excellent blogs on this point elsewhere on newspaper websites such as the Guardian from the UK (sorry, can't find the exact posts).

Human reaction time
Unless a weapon is within reach and the victim has enough presence of mind, it may not serve the purpose of self defense. Imagine you had a weapon locked up in your garage and are attacked in your bedroom by a masked intruder in the middle of the night. If you are half asleep and the attacker succeeds in overpowering you, will your weapon be of any use?

Most crazy mass murderers succeed precisely because their victims are vulnerable, exposed and completely unprepared.

State laws versus private regulations
Secondly, even if the state or country of residence allows guns freely, a private institution may still have the right to ban them from its premises. Examples include religious and educational institutions.

Gathering from several user comments on Yahoo and other sites, that is apparently what happened at the Colorado theater. The theater itself had banned guns from its premises although the state of Colorado has not. Law abiding, sane patrons complied with the rules whereas the gunman who intended to cause mayhem, did not.
Neither gun advocates or opponents can do anything about this discrepancy. After all, we can't insist that a sacred place of worship such as a temple or church, be forced to let deadly weapons on its property.

Those who quote the Second Amendment must realize that freedom always comes at a price. There are people who will misuse their freedoms to hurt people and unlike free speech, the right to carry weapons comes at a much higher price.

Violent Crime, Law Enforcement and Deadly Weapons
In any society, there has to be a certain amount of trust in people if it is to be called a civilized and progressive one. If one has to constantly look over one's shoulder and be prepared to draw out a weapon, there is very little law and order to speak of. As much as people enjoy the Wild Wild West kind of movies, I don't think many people would want to be transported to that era.

There are a couple of scenarios.
(a) Poor law enforcement, strict gun control and availability of guns outside legal means -
This is a scenario similar to tin pot dictatorships, nations with civil war and/or those infested by mafia or drug cartels. In such cases, the gun becomes the tool of oppression. Law enforcement officials are encumbered by niceties such as subpoenas, arrest warrants, lethal force only for self defense, yada yada, but the outlaws run loose, killing anyone who does not toe their line.

Would it help if common folks were armed, too? To some extent, maybe. Unfortunately, getting hold of an effective gun is hard for most poor folks especially where strict gun control laws exist.

I shudder to think what would happen if everyone had guns and there was lawlessness all around. Even the good folks might eventually end up on the wrong side of the law some time. Revenge and counter revenge might be the order of the day. You might as well toss out penal codes in the trash bin and tell the police to go home and find other jobs.

(b) Poor law enforcement, very little or no gun control and availability of guns -
If there is a law and order problem in such a society, it would still be a mess. If general poverty is added to the mix, common people who cannot afford guns would still be at the mercy of those who do.

(c) Strict law enforcement, strict gun control and availability of guns outside legal means -
This is the situation in some US states. Law and order is generally good, calling 911 gets the police to the spot quickly and there is severe punishment for offenses. It is not that one can buy a gun just like buying a pair of shoes.
Law abiding citizens do not own guns but the outlaws do. Psychopaths and crazy killers manage to get illegal weapons and then go berserk. Guns are freely available in the country if one knows the right channels.

However, hardcore criminals such as drug lords and career hit men never go into a crowd and randomly fire at people. Their crimes are never without motive and profit.

The kind of shootings that have happened in Colorado and earlier in Virginia Tech and in Columbine about 13 years ago were not acts of career criminals or even jihadists. These were the actions of regular young people who were disaffected and disturbed. It is in such instances that guns cause more harm than ever.
Of course, even if there were no guns, these people might have done something worse, just like many terrorists do.
Neither the lack of guns nor their universal presence can provide complete insurance against crime.

Take a look at this excellent article in the Guardian on statistics about gun ownership by country. Wikipedia has a comprehensive summary of gun control laws by country, too.

There are crimes committed in probably every nation on earth but the extent and nature vary. It is extremely rare to hear about a disgruntled youngster killing random strangers for no gain unless he/she happens to belong to or identifies with the cause of some terrorist or militant organization.

It is not enough to merely devise systems to punish crime. Punishment can act as a deterrent for criminals without a conscience but the bigger question that we need to ask is - how do people reach that threshold when conscience is no longer a barrier?

Now, some cases have been traced to mental illness of the perpetrators. But, where do we draw the line between a pure act of evil and that of madness? Isn't a complete lack of empathy for another human being itself the sign of a sick mind?

There have been debates all over on prevention of crime. MSN Slate had a fine article on combating such mad acts as a society. You may or may not agree with the premise but the discussion is worth pondering.

Just as a healthy diet, exercise and sanitation are needed to ward off disease along with life saving drugs, crime prevention must be employed along with incarceration and the thump of the police baton to have a healthy society.

Eventually, the overall culture, family and social constraints and individual morality are the best deterrents against crimes.

I am obsessed, fantasy and real world vigilantes - Part I

2012-07-13T22:54:00.000-04:00

Over the past three weeks, I have been in a different world, the world of Lisbeth Salander and Mikael Blomkvist in faraway Sweden. I first encountered them when I started reading the third book in the Millennium trilogy, "The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest".
This book was purchased on my iPad one or two years ago but I hadn't gotten past a few pages before now. I had a lot of free time so I delved into it because I needed something fast paced and suspenseful. It sucked me in like quicksand!
Before I knew it, I was torturing my retinas, trying to read faster and tried telling myself that I would put it away at a certain time of day but those promises to self often came to naught as I got more and more entwined in the author, Stieg Larsson's fantasy world.

Here is Stieg Larsson's site on the Literary Magazine of Swedish books and writers where you'll find lots of discussion forums and news about the author. Some people have criticized the quality of writing in the books on the site and there are even some controversial speculations that he did not write those books all by himself as mentioned in this New Yorker article.
I did observe that the style of writing was more in line with a daily conversational tone. There are very few words that one needs to look up in the dictionary if one's vocabulary is average, and swear words are peppered throughout the text.

Guess what, I don't care. Every author has his/her own style and I appreciate it.

There are authors whose prose is flowery and packed dense with words that an average person cannot make sense of without a dictionary. Take Thomas Hardy's "The Woodlanders" as an example. A moving, simple love triangle in English that is decorated with the English language.
Then there are novels densely populated with characters such as Gabriel Garcia Marquez's "One Hundred Years of Solitude" that spans generations.
These are not novels that one can breeze through but that does not mean that they are not enjoyable or mesmerizing. Boris Pasternak's "Doctor Zhivago" is another epic that I plodded through but it was well worth the effort.

Stieg Larsson's books may not contain poetic prose but they have well-developed characterizations and brilliant, plausible, tight plots told in an intensely suspenseful manner.

The Millennium trilogy consisting of the books with their English translation titles are:

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
The Girl Who Played With Fire
and
The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest

The first one has recently been filmed and released in Hollywood and there are original Swedish film versions of all the three books. I have to yet watch the Swedish movies though I did see the Hollywood one. I thought that the Hollywood movie was quite true to the novel down to some of the dialogues with one key difference (that would be a spoiler). However, I am not sure how much a viewer who has not read the book would be able to grasp of the characters and plot.
The casting, in my opinion, was excellent.

There are articles about the popularity of these books such as this interesting one in the New Yorker magazine (same as the one quoted above). While all the reasons given could very well be true, I personally feel that one reason stacks up above everything else. Why are superheroes such as Superman, Spiderman and movies such as The Dark Knight so popular? Why are there legions of fans for Lara Croft or Xena, the Warrior Princess or Buffy, the Vampire Slayer? We, the public, seem to have an unending thirst for superheroes, detectives and even rescue machines such as the one in the popular Japanese TV series, Giant Robot.

Basically, we want the bad guys whooped, given a dose of their own medicine and even done away with for good. That's the reason Bollywood and regional films such as Tamil cinema in India can get away with letting their human heroes thrash a pack of villains even if they do not have any supernatural, science-fiction-conferred abilities such as those conferred upon Superman or Spiderman. As one of my friends would say, just suspend all logic and watch.
We may rave and rant about letting the law take its own course and denounce harsh punishments such as those enshrined in Sharia law but will gleefully watch Rajnikanth, that South Indian superhero that defies all laws of physics and aging in biology, bash up an army of hooligans with a single gesture.

There are films in India such as the Tamil "Indian" remade in Hindi as "Hindustani" where a former freedom fighter of the British Raj quietly sends corrupt Indian officials to the Great Unknown. The role was brilliantly essayed by the versatile thespian of South Indian cinema, Kamal Haasan and the audience faithfully added to the box office earnings.

The genius of Steig Larsson's books is that he has concocted a heroine who possesses kick-ass fighting skills that would be the envy of Jackie Chan, brains that would have sent NASA, the CIA, Google and Apple to come knocking at her door, the riveting personality and attire of a punk rock rebel and a horrible, frightful past that could very well last an entire season of "Law and Order: Special Victims Unit". Lisbeth Salander makes the phrase "damsel-in-distress" sound like an antiquated fairy tale.

FBI Special Agent Dana Scully, played by the gorgeous Gillian Anderson, in the television series of the 90s and early 00s, "The X-Files", was another female character whom I loved like millions of fans for her brains and investigative abilities, not to mention a quiet beauty that did not require any shedding of clothes to get noticed.
However, Scully as an agent of law and order, mostly played by the rule book. Lisbeth Salander would certainly equal Scully in her investigative abilities but doesn't even care if the rule book exists. Laws, common social niceties and conventions are not among her favorite things. She circumvents rules with impunity and yet maintains moral standards, somewhat along the lines of Robin Hood and Spiderman. She is no cute, popular mainstream amateur detective like the pretty Nancy Drew.

Her unlikely partner in the adventures is the celebrity investigative journalist, Mikael Blomkvist of the magazine, Millennium, hence probably the name "Millennium trilogy" for the series.

Together, they send serial killers and gangsters scampering for their lives. Lisbeth also has to save her own future. I won't tell you more, just read the books.

I may not agree with Salander's means or methods, but I still felt happy as she came out on top each time.

There was a New York Times article by Nicholas Kristof when some women in India took the law into their own hands in bashing up a serial rapist. I am sorry I could not find a free link to post. One has to be a subscriber to access this archived article but you can find references to it online. I found one of them here on a blog, Sepia Mutiny.

What if the law fails miserably at protecting innocent people again and again? Would there be real life versions of Lisbeth Salander? I can already think of one case. Phoolan Devi, also known as the Bandit Queen and immortalized in Shekhar Kapur's film of the same name, was the victim of many injustices and abuse both as a child and an adult. She became an icon among the lawless and was later accepted into the mainstream as she surrendered to the authorities and subsequently entered politics.

I feel that the public secretly loves vigilantes, at least some of them. If you asked someone what they thought of the electric chair for execution or the hanging method, they would probably say they are inhuman. However, the same person may have no qualms seeing a serial killer die a horrible death on screen. I am not generalizing, just saying that at least a few of us share this dichotomy of opinions.

All I know is that I was transported to a different world, just like my childhood days spent reading Enid Blyton's "Famous Five" and "Secret Seven" series. Hope you all enjoy Stieg Larsson's books, too.

I was saddened to learn that the author was dead even before the trilogy was published so there will be no more books from him. I was further impressed when I found that Stieg Larsson was a fearless campaigner against racism, sexism, fascism and exploitation. Read these touching interviews with his longtime partner, Eva Gabrielsson, in Vanity Fair and this interview with his father and brother in The New York Times.

May his soul rest in peace!

A brief hiatus

2012-06-28T20:12:00.000-04:00

To all my readers,

Thank you very much for your time, patience, encouragement and comments.

I have been off the blogosphere a little bit due to personal reasons. I had been busy with relocation to a different place and have hardly had the time to relax, let alone put down my thoughts in a coherent manner.
However, my mind has been picking up signals and information all along and the thought and memory machines have been busy in the background.

I'll be back soon. Until then, take care and have fun!

Education, IT and Outsourcing - The US/India perspective

2012-05-08T20:02:00.000-04:00

Listen up, there is a great post on TechCrunch about the great engineering shortage of 2012.

The article bemoans the fact that fewer students in the US now opt for careers in computer science at the college level but there are more drama majors. On the other hand, tech companies are still looking for great talent. Do read the comments for the article. They are extremely enlightening as to why some people simply got disillusioned with IT or that some others feel that outsourcing and the trend of preferring to hire young people have made the profession unattractive.

There is an interesting article in the Atlantic about the creative class in general and its rising presence in Asia (sorry, can't find the exact link). Here's a link to the author, Richard Florida's book on this topic. The creative class refers to jobs that require creativity, as you guessed right, education and skills. Jobs such as those in programming, journalism, research of any kind would all fall under this category. As I had posted earlier, these include professions of the head and those of the heart.

It is interesting to see how President Obama talks about out-educating and out-innovating everyone else in the world and about creating jobs here in America. There is a discussion on one of my favorite authors and respected writer, Malcolm Gladwell's site about school performance and math scores in the US versus that of other Asian countries. This topic is discussed in his thought-provoking and brilliant, IMHO (in my humble opinion) book, "Outliers".

From my personal experience working both in India and the United States and having seen a fair bit of both countries, I have started to wonder if such a comparison is really an objective one.
I can't speak for other Asian countries but I can talk a little about India. Being a developing country that has traditionally valued education over mere wealth and power (wealth and power are of course important in any society but a well-educated, wealthy executive is likely to be more respected in India than a powerful, rich politician who is poorly educated), Indians typically invest in the education of their children.
One of the driving factors behind the craze towards IT and other intelligent white collar jobs is economics.
The standard of living differs widely between the classes as compared to the US. When I was much younger, someone once jokingly remarked that poverty in India meant living in a slum with no water or electricity or toilets or worse still, on the streets whereas in the US, 'poor' meant you could probably not afford a car.
Maybe the US was a more equitable society back then because looking at Occupy Wall Street and all its sister movements across the country along with people living off food stamps and out of their cars, not every American is now in that golden land where even the poor had access to basic necessities.

However, I still repeat - life in America for the average worker (someone who makes a little more than the minimum wage) is a lot better in at least some respects. One can still send the kids to a public school free of charge, buy groceries, have some cheap food, rent a decent apartment which usually comes equipped with a dishwasher, at least a common laundry room if not a washer/dryer in the unit, cooking range with oven and a refrigerator. One can buy used cheap furniture from craigslist or Goodwill and at least own an old used car. In short, basic necessities such as food, clothing, shelter, school education and even basic appliances that are commonly used in modern life are reasonably accessible.

Indians who are fresh off the boat in the United States typically covert dollars to rupees to cross check prices with that in India. This applies especially to certain items such as clothing, not items such as electronic ones. I have realized long ago that this is really not the way to compare unless you are on a short term visit and have no permanent income in the United States. Consider a television set, something brand new and cutting edge such as a Plasma or LED flat screen TV. What percentage of the average monthly income does this cost? The prices of electronic items have fallen so that even the average person can now buy a smaller flat screen LCD TV if not an LED TV at least during a massive Black Friday sale.
Ditto for laptops and touchscreen tablets such as Kindle or iPad.

On the other hand, let us consider the average Indian, someone who works in a factory or in an administrative job, not a hot shot IT professional or investment banker.

Renting in many Indian cities is very expensive so people prefer to buy property which means a portion of the monthly income has to be set aside to pay the loan. Most of the white collar jobs are concentrated in cities that are bursting at the seams with human population so even a single bedroom apartment in a far flung suburb of a megapolis such as Mumbai could cost you lakhs or even crores of rupees (1 lakh = 0.1 million and 1 crore = 0.1 billion, these are numeric units used commonly in South Asia).

One has to shell out all the money for appliances from one's own pocket as most apartments do not come built in with these. A car used to be a luxury even as late as the 1990s but with the introduction of cheaper cars such as the Tata Nano and more urban middle class professionals, car ownership has gone up significantly.
Public schools in India are far fewer than private schools and government schools have horrendous reputations (isn't that a paradox considering that India is supposed to be socialist and the US is supposed to be capitalist?). Gaining admission for a child to a 'good' school is getting expensive not to mention the need to save for college education. When I was a child studying in a private school that was government aided, I paid hardly any fees as the state government subsidized education for girls and also because schools that fulfilled certain government mandates could get additional funding. This may not be true for all Indian schools in all states.
On the other hand, a Bachelor's degree in the US costs an astronomical sum of money, especially if you send your son or daughter to a private University or an Ivy League school. Therefore, all is not hunky dory for a middle class family in the US either.

There are a couple of areas where the average Indian is better off than the average American.

1. Access to affordable everyday health care - Unlike the US, Indians generally do not need health insurance or even an appointment to see a primary care physician for a fever, eyesight or hearing problems or other common ailments. In fact, one can even see a specialist without insurance though they charge a lot. It is still not as bank-balance-draining as it is in the US. These are private practitioners not government clinics or state sponsored health care that I am talking about.
Owing to malpractice suits and the strain on the American health care system due to other factors, insurance has become a must-have and losing it when say, one is laid off from work, can be terrifying. Of course, one can buy insurance on one's own means but it is expensive in general.

2. Getting by without a car - Indian cities generally have good public transport as well as private providers such as auto rickshaws. One can walk to neighborhood stores and markets in many places making it a lot easier to get by without buying a car.

In general, the average standard of living in the United States is much better for someone in the middle/lower middle classes as compared to the same in India.
If you don't run a successful business, entry into the middle class and the ladder of prosperity are virtually impossible without education and landing a respectable, well-paying job.

After the formation and expansion of giants such as Microsoft and Apple and the need for computerization is every industry from banking to health care, information technology jobs have flourished and boomed in number.
The amount of code that needs to be written for large systems has been expanding and with it, the need for more programmers, quality assurance analysts and associated professionals such as those in management, marketing and sales has been burgeoning, too. Seeing what IT can bring into their lives, more and more youth have been opting for degrees in computer science, engineering and related fields and jumping onto the IT bandwagon.
IT offers jobs that give some scope for analytical ability and learning skills and thus the mental challenge along with pretty handsome salaries and a nice, modern office environment.
IT also gives professionals the chance to travel and live abroad, get acquainted with other cultures and enjoy a far better standard of living than in India. Even in India, top IT guys and gals have higher standards of living than probably the poor in the West.

However, this also means that many who get into programming or testing software do not do it because it is their passion. Bill Gates founding Microsoft, Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak establishing Apple or Larry Page and Sergey Brin birthing Google happened not because these people wanted to get into well paying, secure jobs with all the accompanying perks but because of their natural interest in computers and the passion to impact the world with their innovative products.
Of course, we have Indian techies who are knowledgeable enough to co-author books and contribute to online forums and tutorials and some are instrumental to their project teams abroad but there still remains a sizable number for whom IT is not exactly their calling.
What was creative, fulfilling work for the likes of Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak of Apple or Larry Page and Sergey Brin has taken on the nature of grunt work or drudgery for thousands involving fixing bugs, testing and re-testing and performing customer support tasks. Don't get me wrong, there are several who would excel at these tasks and even find them enjoyable but not everyone does and even an enthusiastic, intelligent worker may tire after years of repetitive work sitting alone in a cubicle for long hours.

Even in a country like India that values gurus and intellectuals to the highest degree, droves of young people started to march into IT and call centers while few became scientists or innovative entrepreneurs. The reasons for these are also because there are very few research centers other than those funded by the government and starting a business in India was not exactly a piece of cake even a decade ago.
Wonder what would happen if more Indians started to follow the current mantra of the developed world - Do what you love?
Would outsourcing be the same then? Maybe some other countries would step into India's shoes...
We do not know.

Conscious capitalism, Indian entrepreneurs and an awesome well-known Indian blogger

2012-04-24T23:27:00.000-04:00

For a long time now, I have been following the blog, Youthcurry, of a famous Indian blogger and author, Rashmi Bansal.

This is a blog about youth affairs, trends, education and careers. Opting out of the science-stream-engineering-medicine rat race of the Indian educational system at a young age, she majored in economics instead and went on to graduate from the prestigious Indian Institute of Management at Ahmedabad, also known as IIM A, one of India's top business schools.

Again, instead of merely continuing to climb the corporate ladder and drawing a hefty pay check, she went on to launch her own magazine - JAM (Just Another Magazine), a youth magazine.

Besides maintaining a popular blog, she has also authored three books on Indian entrepreneurs. Some of them are social entrepreneurs who have launched ventures that benefit the poor or further the cause of education.

Now, she has a new book coming out on Dharavi, nicknamed Asia's largest slum, located in Mumbai, India, titled - Poor Little Rich Slum. There is a great article on Dharavi in the National Geographic magazine here.

Ever watched the movie - Slumdog Millionaire? Well, coming from Mumbai, I know that slums are not just about poor, helpless people. Dharavi residents work and run businesses and their children go to school just like other people living in comfortable, legitimate apartments and houses.
The poor there aspire to a better life, too, and, in fact, Dharavi is known for some of its economic activities. For example, while I was still living in Mumbai, I knew that Dharavi had a famous road side leather goods market where one could buy leather jackets and the like before embarking on a trip to colder climes in America or Europe.

It would be interesting to read this book.

Entrepreneurship in India was lesser known in the past, confined to only the sons (and occasionally daughters) of families who were traditionally into business. There was even a stereotype that only Indians belonging to certain ethnic groups, such as the people who were natives of Gujarat (Gujaratis) or Rajasthan (Marwaris, one particular sub group from the state) had a knack for it.
Now, Indians are gradually waking up to the fact that one can do one's own thing and be successful and, better still, create jobs for other people and even make a difference in the lives of the less fortunate.

Meanwhile, I checked out the websites of some of her other books and it has been absolutely fascinating and inspiring. I lost myself in the stories of the people featured in her books and received a jolt of enthusiasm from it. Do check them out here:

Stay Hungry Stay Foolish

Connect the Dots

I Have a Dream

I popped in on a site called Goodreads to check out the page on her third book and was pleasantly surprised to see a lot of new books featured on the side bar, both fiction and non-fiction, penned by budding Indian authors.

This is another thing I admire about America and was struck by, during my initial years here. I was fascinated by the number of books that were being written by all sorts of people from journalists to professors and even politicians and how they promoted their books on various news channels such as Fox News, CNN, etc.
And, of course, American entrepreneurship. In my previous post, I had talked about the things that I was struck by when I came to the US. This is a key point.
In America, as a general observation, individuals do not wait for the government or some external entity to make changes in their lives. They start their own ventures, get organized as a community and take action.

When I lived in India, there was a columnist I followed very avidly in the Times of India, the economist, Swaminathan S Ankalesaria Aiyar. Having no educational background in economics except for a basic, introductory course in just one semester during my degree program, I learnt about terms such as 'trickle down effect', 'free market economy' and 'protectionism'.

India only started liberalizing its economy and allowing foreign direct investment in the early 1990s so we were a little late to the game. Foreign goods were looked upon as a luxury and were sometimes smuggled into the country. All this encouraged corruption.
Of course, there were big corporations that are British or perhaps a combination of British and Indian in origin that have been around since the days of British rule, for example, Britannia, Cadbury (now acquired by Kraft Foods) and Hindustan Lever (the Indian arm of Unilever). The American giant, Johnson and Johnson, opened shop in India after independence in 1957. However, it was extremely difficult for newer companies from other countries to enter and directly do business in India.

Mr. Swaminathan Aiyar asked the question (paraphrasing is all mine) as to why should India only be afraid of being overrun by foreign corporations. Rather, why couldn't Indian companies compete and stand tall with them? This has certainly proved true.

Recently, Ford sold its Jaguar division to Tata, an Indian company. The Indian steel magnate, Lakshmi Mittal, founded a company that took over Arcelor and is now one of the world's largest steel companies, ArcelorMittal.

There was a time when there was a certain amount of paranoia against foreign companies. Today, American companies such as McDonald's, KFC, Pizza Hut, Domino's Pizza, Subway, Kellog's, General Motors, Ford, Coca Cola and Pepsi, to name a few, have a major presence in India along with Japanese, German, South Korean and British biggies such as Toyota, Volkswagen, Hyundai and Vodafone.

Although India was never a Soviet-style Communist economy, it wasn't the open, all out capitalist economy that the US is. Over the last two decades and more, India has been embracing more free-market economics and capitalism. Ordinary Indians, besides just being consumers, are waking up to the potential that increased competition and economic opportunity bring.

There is another side to capitalism besides the large corporation that kills all the Mom-and-Pop businesses and cares more about its bottom line than workers. Not all large corporations are devoid of responsibility and concern for their workers and other staff.

Capitalism, in its benevolent form, has the potential to transform society in a very positive way. I call this conscious capitalism, borrowed from the term 'conscious living' from many spiritual movements and one of my favorite personal development gurus and bloggers, Steve Pavlina. Companies think about their impact on the environment, their employees and society at large and act responsibly like a good citizen, even going beyond the bare minimum expectations at times.

Small businesses offering some unique products that are more environment friendly and affordable, can command a market share, too. One sees this a lot in the green products area. In the US, some of these products such as eco-friendly, natural cleaners and cosmetics, have spilled over the shelves of specialty stores such as Whole Foods into regular departmental stores. One such brand is Seventh Generation Inc. which now has natural antibacterial cleaners and cleaning wipes, even infant diapers and baby wipes.
A lot of local, environment-friendly, biodegradable baby diaper companies such as gDiapers, are now gaining a market niche in the presence of heavyweight brands such as Pampers and Huggies.

As for dairy and other food products, local is the new powerful. There is something so comforting about knowing that your milk comes from local farmers that send out their cattle to peaceful pasture with lots of fresh air and sunshine and without pumping them with hormones, that many of us tend to prefer that over some big name dairy brand.

Then, there are the socially conscious companies such as Toms that donate shoes and other items to people in need. In fact, Toms donates a pair of shoes for every pair purchased! Take another example, Zappos, that motivates its employees including call center workers, giving them freedom to grow and perform their jobs without treating them like assembly line robots. Check out their corporate culture on Zappos Insights.

Imagine if every country in the world embarked on a path of economic freedom for its citizens and created opportunities. That would probably mark an end to global poverty and underdevelopment, needless wars and destruction...

As the famous John Lennon song goes - Imagine...

Nationality - Lines on the earth, lines in our minds - I

2012-04-22T02:15:00.000-04:00

This train of thought has been inspired by various personal observations over the years, news from various media, politics and some novels.

The English Patient - One of the chief characters, Count Ladislaus de Almasy, considers himself a man without national boundaries

The Namesake - a touching story of an Indian immigrant family in the United States

(Both of the above novels have been made into acclaimed movies)

and a subscription mail from another blogger who decided to become a US citizen.

Those of us who have lived in more than one country, called more than one place home, know exactly the pull of different directions on our hearts - from the country of birth as well as our country of
residence.

The First Few Years, Initial Impressions of the United States of America

When I initially landed in the United States, I was floored by the neatness and systematic nature of everything - right from the roads to the malls, restaurants, parking lots and the disciplined sense of traffic on clearly marked lanes. I marveled at the planned manner in which even interstates had numbers and cities/attractions, exits and rest areas were clearly marked and the way driving tests were administered. The absence of corruption from everyday life was a great source (and still is) of admiration.

This is the honeymoon phase. The phase when everything around you seems bathed in a halo of light from paradise. I am not saying that I was so gullible as to believe that there was no crime or poverty or any other problem in the US (after all, I had seen television documentaries on serial killers in America).

However, in general, the attitudes of people and their way of life were, and still are, enchanting.

For the record, I come not from some podunk, underdeveloped Third World area but from a bustling metropolis, Mumbai, in India. This is a major Asian city and sea port, complete with the stock market, Bollywood, fashion, Miss India contests, newspapers and publishing, banking and corporate offices of a number of companies spread out across various sectors.

Mumbai represents the microcosm of what America represents to the world. People come here (and to other Indian cities such as Bangalore) in search of opportunity, which, in turn, will propel them towards greater personal freedom.

Young graduates from smaller towns come here in search of jobs and get exposed to people from other parts of India, the latest fashions, restaurants, coffee shops, even nightclubs and also sometimes meet their significant other, rather than just stay home in their small towns and settle into an arranged marriage.

Unlike small towns, people have the freedom to dress as they please without being ogled at or sometimes even harassed and live without caring all the time about what the neighbors will think of them.

Disposable income enables them to buy everything from cell phones to television sets and if they earn enough and invest wisely, a flat and a car.

I guess this may be the case with many big cities in the world.

Yet, apart from the malls and McDonald's outlets, there is still a sense of chaos and dirt in Indian cities. Due to overcrowding in cities where people in white collar jobs have to absolutely reside if they wish to move up in their careers, pollution, traffic and waste choke the joy out of a daily peaceful existence. Most have to endure long, harrowing commutes in jam-packed trains and buses or inhale toxic fumes on snail-paced busy roads, leaving little time or opportunity to enjoy nature and outdoor activities.

There is a sense of everything being difficult, some of it due to facts, and I suspect some of it being due to perception, from registering to vote to paying a traffic ticket to, heck, driving from place A to B or finding a clean restroom where there are no malls and fancy restaurants or coffee shops. I had written about the blessing of malls in this respect a few years ago in this post, "Malls and Loos".
Some other bloggers such as Rajeev Srinivasan had mentioned the relative difficulty of daily life in India (sorry, can't find the exact blog post).

And, no matter where you live in India, I still cannot escape the feeling that there is a stifling lack of individual freedom. This is not due to legal or constitutional factors. It is a social construct that has been passed from ancient times but has, of course, changed and become more liberal with modern times.

However, the pressure to marry a person approved by one's parents at the right age, or dressing in a certain manner, or finding a secure job, still remains.

The difference is that younger Indians are more likely to aggressively pursue higher education and a well-paying job and they are also more open to travel, luxury, eating out and the pleasures of life as compared to past generations.

There is also idealism in them as seen by the reaction to Anna Hazare or the candlelit vigils demanding justice for Jessica Lall.

There are also more love marriages, especially in urban areas and Indian models and designers have carved out a niche internationally.

Okay, I have summed up some of the positives and negatives of living in India, not from a superficial, touristy stand point, but from the perspective of the average, aspirational citizen.

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Now, onto the land of the free and the home of the brave as the US National Anthem goes...

America always held a strange appeal for me when I was younger but I never really thought that I would make it my home. Reading about the various interdisciplinary fields and research opportunities in US universities in my Saturday Times of India, I was fascinated by the fact that one could combine one's interests in different fields, pursue an area of interest not just for the money and expand one's horizons in so many ways. I had a vague sense of America being the land of opportunity.

I had heard about the 'dignity of labor' in America, about how a student at a top college could work as a waiter or dishwasher in a restaurant and not think of such work as below him or her or be perceived by others as somehow inferior.

I knew little about American society or American politics except that they had a different kind of democracy from India's, and that it was a lot more socially liberal than India, just like other 'Western' countries.

It is funny how we lump all Western countries into one and all Eastern countries into another, and, perhaps, African nations, Middle Eastern nations, etc., not realizing the various nuances and glaring differences in their political systems, economies and cultures.

We did study a bit about the American War of Independence and The Declaration of Independence in high school and chapters pertaining to slavery and works by Mark Twain (if I remember correctly).

And popular culture in the form of Hollywood movies, TV series and American novels such as Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys, Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn and Archie comics were part of my life.

Coming from an English medium educational background, adjusting to life in an English-speaking country was fairly easy, barring the initial difficulty in understanding the American accent as opposed to India's British English and pronouncing words in a way that the average American did not go, "What's that?"

Note, for example, the difference in which the word, 'mandatory' is pronounced in the US and outside.

Or the more well known 'schedule' pronounced with an 'sh' in British English and 'sk' in American English.

Or the noun form of 'record'. The Brits pronounce both the noun and verb form in a similar fashion whereas the Americans pronounce the noun form differently. You can refer to Dictionary.com for phonetic details.

Americans also roll their 'r's a lot more and soften their 't's as compared to the British.

There is also the difference in spellings between US English and British English such as 'traveling' (US English) and 'travelling' (UK English) and 'honor, flavor, color, tire' (US) and 'honour, flavour, colour, tyre' (UK). US English does not differentiate between the verb and noun forms of 'practice' so there is no verb, 'practise'.

The linguistic adaptation was relatively easy as compared with someone not fluent in English. Overall, the American manner of everyday speech is simple and easy to understand and I felt, even somewhat casual.

One of the facts that strikes you the most is the adherence to law and order and rules here.

People generally follow the rules, whether it is stopping at a 'Stop' sign (trust me, I hadn't seen Stop or Yield signs in India with their transnationally understood octagonal and triangular signs respectively or even heard of them), or signaling to change lanes or dumping garbage in the designated bins.

Live and let live

These are minor when you compare it to the big issues that can really make or break a democratic society.

For example, a person who has never traveled out of a developing or underdeveloped nation or a country with strong religious factions may believe that all Westerners are ultra liberal and do not care much for personal morals such as dressing modestly or respect marriage or religion.

While it is true that one can generally wear what one wants and live with whoever one pleases, America has rules and cultural taboos, too. For example, one cannot streak across the street naked unless you are at a nudist beach and, in the past, most people disapproved of homosexuality. Even today, there is a section of the population for whom homosexuality is a strict no. In general, people have become more accepting of different sexual orientations and even alternate relationship models such as polyamory.

Premarital sex and living together before marriage used to be more of a taboo long ago. And, yes, cheating on your partner and having extra-marital affairs is not cool anywhere.

Did you know that both adultery and homosexuality were punishable offenses in the US a few decades ago and adultery is still so in some states as shown by this Wikipedia article? As for India, there are some archaic laws regarding adultery dating back to the Victorian era probably because no one bothered to amend the Constitution or penal code. Thanks to the efforts of India's progressive citizens and the judiciary, some of them have been repealed, for example, the law against homosexual acts was repealed in 2009.

True, there are stray incidents in the US such as violence against gays. The Mathew Shepard story is one such example. Sometimes, gay teens still get bullied in school and this has led to some tragic suicides.

For all its liberties, America has a right wing, too.

Women who sleep around are still called 'sluts' and 'whores'. The right wing radio pundit, Rush Limbaugh, got into a lot of hot water after he referred to women using contraceptives as 'sluts'.

And, when strip clubs were opened in some parts of America, there was opposition from the more traditional populace. Today, the grounds for opposition are less clothed in morality and more related to matters such as fears of a higher crime rate as seen here and here.

The difference, though, is that in America, you just can't break the law and get away with it. You will get prosecuted within a reasonable time frame. If citizens do not agree with a law, they campaign against it and work to overturn it.

Secondly, you can say what you want. The left and the right wing make all sorts of comments but no one can haul you to court because everyone accepts that free speech is sacred. You can yap all you please, but if other people stop talking to you after that, it is your problem.

What I truly admire about the American people is that everyone here is left in peace to live their lives as long as they are not breaking the law.

Compare that to India where we have a gem of a Constitution and probably most if not all the liberties enshrined in the US Constitution (archaic laws related to homosexuality and adultery were/are still unfortunately on the books passed down from the days of the British Empire) BUT in practice, any political party can run amok.

The main difference between India and the US is not the spirit of the law, rather, its implementation.

Over the last few decades, we had right wing parties such as the RSS and Shiv Sena and their affiliates or emulators telling girls they should not wear jeans and go to night clubs, sometimes physically obstructing business establishments, without any regard for individual rights.

What is even more depressing is that many Indians actually support such actions in the name of defending Indian 'culture'. Culture can never be forced down anyone's throat and democracy can never mature and progress without individual liberty. Most importantly, cultures change, they evolve.

What such parties do not understand is that Indians living abroad maintain their culture and traditions very well. For example, many of us wear cute tops, jeans and skirts and occasionally go to clubs here but also celebrate Navratri and Diwali and wear salwar kameezes and bindis and host Indian dinner parties complete with samosas, gajar ka halwa and medu wadas. Heck, there are Indian associations for various linguistic groups such as Tamil Mandrams, Malayali Samajams and Maharashtrian ones.

Some Indians actively participate in classical music recitals and Bharatnatyam performances, too. Indian maestros tour the US and other countries, attracting a loyal fan following.

The sheer ease of daily life

Daily life is just too easy in the US if you compare it with India. Consider renting an apartment. In America, you look it up on the Internet, talk to the apartment office, take a tour, sign the lease and make whatever payments are necessary. You'll get your own space complete with dishwasher, stove, refrigerator, running water, electricity, a decent bathroom, mostly even a washer and dryer.

Call the cable company for your Internet and TV and you are ready to settle in.

In India, well, life is a little more complicated. True, you have real estate agents and local cable operators who are kind of middlemen rather than service providers but, sometimes, you have to haggle with them and you don't get so many amenities in a flat.

There are places where you still have water cuts, power cuts and all those little hassles.

And, there are some apartment complexes or housing societies as they are called, where the neighborhood Aunty or Mami (Tamilian for Aunty) will certainly raise a storm or at least her eyebrows if there is a group of single guys wanting to rent out a place in close proximity to their teenage daughters.

Ample space and scope for leisure

As the Master Card ad says, there are some things that money can't buy. Clean roads, tree-lined boulevards and local parks for walking, bicycling and just enjoying the company of nature are available virtually all over the US. To add icing to the cake, there are umpteen avenues for recreation and sports ranging from skiing to kayaking and skydiving.

Unfortunately, India needs a lot of work done in the civic area. I remember visiting the posh Juhu neighborhood of Mumbai where a lot of Bollywood stars live in their outrageously priced homes. Guess what, the choking traffic and streets so crowded that you would have to have serious maze-navigating skills, are the same as in the poorest localities.

Smaller towns are not faring much better either. Streets are shared by everyone from pedestrians to hawkers and trucks and there are very few well-maintained outdoor spaces.

The existing noise pollution is compounded by festivities during Indian religious events such as Navratri, Ganesh Chaturthi and Deepavali, to name a few major ones, not to mention secular events such as elections, weddings, etc.

Fall in the US

The green countryside in Southern India

Sorry, I don't have pictures of the busy streets in Indian cities that I can share in public.

Women and work

You can do a lot of things as a woman here. You'll find women in hardware stores such as Home Depot or driving trucks and public transport buses or even working as cable company service people.

Women can technically do everything in India, too. I have seen girls working in gas stations and factories back home, too. It is just that there is more of a general sense of safety and opportunity in US society.

Individualism and a plethora of stars and entertainment

I remember reading in my civic classes about the founding values of the US - life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

Individualism is celebrated in America. The average person's contributions are highly valued. I had seen a trend in the Indian media, particularly in the 90s and early 200s, of glorifying only some individuals, be it certain Bollywood actors or cricket stars.

Open a mainstream US newspaper and one will not find much celebrity talk at all. On the contrary, I was pleasantly surprised to read about teachers, gardeners, local heroes and such.

There are tons of actors, models, athletes, pop stars and other celebrities that are featured in magazines. Individuals from other walks of life get their limelight, too. Lots of people are well dressed, made up and are shown to be pursuing their dreams.

In short, you won't see only the same stars talked about day in and day out. There is a huge variety. India also has its chefs, fitness experts and athletes who are not from cricket. It is just that their volume in the US is staggering.

When it comes to movies, I was excited to discover different types of movie channels and channels exclusively dedicated to food and travel. There are stars in all these areas - chefs, physical trainers, adventurers and TV hosts.

Of particular interest to me were the movie channels dedicated to true stories and mysteries and I also watched a little bit of science fiction.

India has a multitude of TV channels, too. What is more, we have TV series and movies in multiple languages. What I am talking about is the type of movies and entertainment, the genre, not the number.

The average person in America is aspirational. Uniqueness is welcomed. What I have felt after living here is the opening up of a wide range of possibility inside me. The 'do what you love and find your niche' mantra circulates in some form a lot.

As an individual, I now have both India and America in my psychological make-up and life path.

Immigrants change a country and their chosen land changes them, too. I think immigration changes the land of birth, too, if significant numbers start emigrating. Maybe it is not just emigration but the forces of economics and global politics that cause the change but the diaspora of any country can have a very positive impact on it.

More to come in Part 2...

My sincere thanks to Wikipedia for all the information that I have linked to, along with some news and other organization sites.

More inspiring blogs and a little paradise for tea lovers

2012-04-03T21:42:00.032-04:00

I had said there was more to come from my side.

Well, here are are my favorites from my wanderings on the vast ocean that is the Internet...

The Unlost is a blog by a girl who has decided to challenge the status quo of slogging away in a cubicle at a job you don't like just to buy security and some material things. Her posts are hilarious and touch a chord with lots of folks, young and not so young.

********** ********** ********** **********

Balance in Me is a site devoted to, as the name suggests, leading a life of balance, inner peace and harmony. It has loads of useful information and lovely guest posts. Check out the post on Women's Day. It has a beautiful ode to womanhood and a lovingly put together list of links to other inspiring blogs and sites.

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Recently, I chanced upon the website of a tea lounge in San Francisco through Leo's Zen Habits blog. This is a group of tea shops that are part of the establishment called Samovar Tea Lounge. Do check out their blog. They have interesting interviews with other bloggers, writers and technology people.

What I love most about Samovar is their Zen philosophy of living life in the present moment and the brewing and enjoyment of a fine tea symbolizes just that.

I am a big fan of tea, especially Indian masala chai (a concoction of black tea and milk with ginger and spices such as cardamom, cinnamon and cloves, sometimes even fennel seeds and black pepper). There is nothing like a steaming hot cup of tea while contemplating life, listening to music and watching the rain or snow outside.

I am trying to watch my caffeine intake but I give in to my tea cravings at least once a day.

Tea is a ritual for many families. The Japanese are known for their elaborate tea ceremonies. Tea is symbolic with the British way of life and hospitality. For me, growing up in India, I would have tea late in the afternoon with a pastry called 'khaari biscuit', which is a multilayered, salty, empty pastry puff or 'rusks', a hard, crunchy, slightly sweet bread or some other biscuits, and a newspaper spread out before me.

Note to American readers: Biscuits in India are more like crackers, not the dish that is available in McDonalds and other places. The Indian term is probably from the UK because where else would Indians have derived it from?

I miss the many varieties of biscuits in India, ranging from the cream-filled ones to the plain dipping Marie biscuits. Lately, I had a craving for Britannia Bourbon - the chocolate cream filled biscuit that is a little more expensive in Indian grocery stores here in the US.

Although I had heard about the health benefits of green tea, thanks to nutritionists such as Anjali Mukherjee who used to counsel contestants for Miss India and write columns in newspapers such as the Times of India, I never saw it regularly sold in grocery stores in India many years ago. These days, green tea has become more readily available. It was after I came to the US that I was exposed to the notion that tea did not mean just the tea leaf, Camellia sinensis. The fascinating array of herbal teas such as peppermint, chamomile and lots more, claiming to benefit people in many ways, ranging from relieving stomach disorders to menstrual cramps, is simply staggering.

I learnt about Chinese oolong and white tea, too, which basically differ from black tea in the level of oxidation and maturity of the tea leaf. There are many varieties of Chinese teas and we came across a few of them in the World Spice Merchant store near Pike Place Market in Seattle. I had never seen full leaf teas in India, let along oolong and white tea, which is surprising since India is a major tea exporter. [There are a lot of items that had somehow never become commonplace in India such as tofu given the proximity of nations such as Thailand and China and that is also very strange.]

The sheer number of flavors that can be added to tea such as orange blossom and peach expand the recipe list of this fascinating leaf even more. Tasting tea becomes the act of a connoisseur, just like tasting wine, with its myriad subtle aromas.

I have tried the Darjeeling Full Leaf Organic and Assam Full Leaf teas at Peet's Coffee and Tea and I can vouch for it, there is something about the aroma and satiety of sipping a full leaf tea that dried tea cannot equal.

I wish Indians (and people in other nationalities) followed their passions and opened up such unique establishments, in line with their philosophy and oriented towards customer service. There would be clean restrooms, a safe, cozy place to meet up with your friends and chat and one would get exposed to simple gastronomic pleasures.

Sula Wines is an agro-based establishment that was set up by a budding Indian entrepreneur which is such an example.

'Chai kadas' (tea shops) in Kerala, where the public gathered to gossip and discuss politics, and Irani tea shops in Mumbai (formerly known as Bombay) were iconic. The 'cutting chai' (a half glass of strong, milky tea - even the glass has a typical shape) sold on the street side in India can still beat the tea served at five star hotels.

My college room mate from Kashmir told me of the many cups of tea they consumed in a day, one of which was intriguingly called 'kehwa' (if I remember it correctly). It was through my Kashmiri friends that I probably first heard of the 'samovar' and even got to see one.

I would love to try all these some day including Tibetan tea with yak's butter.

A long time ago, I had also written about another beloved tea of mine, the red tea, known as rooibos (pronounced as roy-bos), from South Africa. This has no caffeine and brims with antioxidants.

I am off to make myself a cup of tea and when I visit San Francisco, I surely am hoping to check out Samovar.

Note: There was a typo in this post, 'newspaper' had been typed in mistakenly as 'newspapaer'. Sorry about that. Thanks.

New find - A blog for multipotentialites

2012-03-26T20:38:00.004-04:00

Over the last few days, I was busy trawling the blogosphere and in the course of my web sojourn, I hit some treasures - lovely, inspiring blogs that truly and absolutely rock.

I am sharing one of these with you today.

Puttylike is a blog that focuses on people with multiple interests and abilities, who often find it hard to dedicate their entire lives to just one pursuit or profession. In short, it is all about multipotentialites and helping them channel their many passions into their life's work. I had never heard of that term before.

I was a 'finger-in-many-pies' kind of person, or rather, a budding 'multipotentialite' as I now know myself to be, right from my school days. I participated in a wide variety of activities ranging from public speaking to group singing (I was not confident enough to sing solo), with everything such as plays, writing and drawing/painting thrown into the mix.

What is even more interesting is that if someone asked me which my favorite subject was, I would be hard pressed to name one. What was a little more intriguing and a little worrying at times was that there wasn't a subject that I despised either.
I loved history, geography, science, even math and languages which I easily scored high marks in. Even a second language that I was not fluent in did not make it into my hate list. My hate list was empty.

Looking back now, I feel that was a golden period in my life when learning was fun. While marks and competition to be at the top of the class always loomed large, they were not the sole focus of my academic life and that was the secret to success, too.
Later in life, I became too caught up in worries, worries that I had not done enough, worked hard enough or smart enough or as much as my neighbor or enough to make the mark and, of course, worries about results.

In degree college and in working life, I missed the variety that was the part of my life from reading John Keats and Tukaram, Jerome K. Jerome and Munshi Premchand, or learning about Eratosthenes and volcanoes and the French Revolution, along with Henri Becquerel and radioactive theory and cell division, not to mention trigonometry and card game probability.

Laser focus on one area alone bored me quite a bit though I some times wonder if I just chose the wrong major. There were core subjects in college that I enjoyed and grasped very well though. Extra-curricular activities were a part of my college life, too, and I added some sports (badminton) to my repertoire though I was never really an athletic type.

A few months ago, I started reading a book on Leonardo da Vinci, the Renaissance genius, named "How to think like Leonardo da Vinci" (note: the link points to Amazon.com). In my childhood and early adulthood, I only knew da Vinci as a legendary painter, the creator of the Mona Lisa and The Last Supper.
The master became a huge inspiration to me after I started learning more about his life from museum exhibits and other sources of information. Imagine trying to learn about the human body when one is not a professional doctor or about the science of flying when one has no formal training in the area.

How many worlds there are still to explore and how many of us even bother to notice patterns of nature around us, be it the constellations in the sky or the behavior of birds in our own backyards?
Most of our knowledge is bookish, it is rather information passed down to us, rather than anything we experience or observe on our own. That, I feel, is the tragedy of our Information Age and the mad race of getting into a good college and establishing a career.

Some of the world's greatest minds, be they scientists or philosophers or many other professionals, were keen observers.
Today, I am inspired all the more to explore, to learn and utilize many more of my talents than I used to in the past.

Do check out Puttylike and the book that I mentioned.

P.S. I just found out that Eratosthenes was a multipotentialite, too, courtesy of Wikipedia.

Online Healing Fest

2012-03-14T21:27:00.000-04:00

I have been in hibernation for about three weeks now on this blog.

There is lots I have to share with you readers.

Here is something that I have been listening to:

The Online Spring Forest Healing Fest

hosted by Learning Strategies. This is a series of free sessions on Qigong every day for about a week that started on this Monday, March 12, 2012.

From what I've learnt so far, Qigong is an ancient Chinese healing practice that deals with energy flow and the body's own capacity to heal itself. It is used to help with a variety of physical and mental ailments.

Note: I am not a doctor so any information posted here should not be used as a substitute for your physician's advice or prescription.

Every day, two new online sessions are posted on the site at about 10:00 a.m. US Central time and are available until 9:30 a.m. the next day. If you wish to listen to them afterwards, you have to upgrade by payment. Registration is free so those who wish to avail of this opportunity, please do.

Until next time, then. Ciao!

Gender Stereotyping - Catch them young

2012-02-22T17:40:00.002-05:00

The Oscars are just around the corner, next Sunday to be more precise.
One of the bloggers at Backstage Unscripted had written about women in comedy and how they are getting their due during this year's Oscars. Women were not appreciated as much as men for their gift of evoking laughter from others. The said post beautifully illustrates how even cinema is now divided into flicks aimed at girls and guys.

There are so many gender stereotypes that we blindly swallow from the society and culture around us.

I highly recommend the movie, "Bend it like Beckham" to illustrate my point. I've heard that "Billy Elliot" is based on a similar premise, too, although I've yet to watch it.

I - In the cradle and nursery:

As most of my friends have either had babies or are expecting, I get to see this whole pink for girls - blue for boys fashion in its full glory. In India, prenatal revelation of the gender of the fetus is banned by law as this enables some male-chauvinistic families to abort it if it is a female so people can't really buy gender-specific stuff in advance for the baby.
We do see little girls decked up in pink frilly dresses but I had never seen the color-coordination rage as much until I came to the United States. Not only does the stereotyping extend to color but decorations of baby rooms and toys. Thus, one gets to see 'Bob the Builder' plastered all over a little boy's room and a lot of Lego sprawling on the floor but go to a little girl's room and we get to see Barbie dolls, mermaids and princesses from every conceivable fairy tale. Dora from the modern ages would probably make it, too.

Boys' room decorated with 'Bob The Builder'

Lego recently introduced some toys specifically designed to attract girls with their pastel color combinations. There has been a lot of controversy regarding this. Just read this article and the comments on the Huffington Post.
Some people say that boys are naturally more inclined towards building, construction, tinkering and the like whereas girls are naturally attracted to playing house and dressing up dolls. In short, machines and tools are more boy-friendly whereas anything to do with people skills, babying and housekeeping is more girl-friendly.

II - The wedding princess stereotype:

Well, if it was just some innocent child's play, it could be left at that. But wait, it gets more complicated as kids grow up. Boys are taught not to cry, not to be a wimp and girls are taught to be 'nice'.

Every romantic Hollywood comedy talks about how, since she was a little girl, the heroine had always dreamed of 'this' day (meaning her wedding day) when she could wear a stunning white gown and a sparkling diamond ring on her finger and walk down the aisle to meet her Prince Charming, her knight in shining armor.
The drama around weddings sells TV shows and movies which otherwise don't have that much to say, really.
A little side note: [I thought Bollywood and Indian weddings with their 1000-plus guest list of everybody and their cousin plus a pirate's booty worth of gold jewelry and exquisite silk garments, not to mention our three-course meals with at least ten dishes, was so much of excess. However, I was mistaken.
Indian weddings at least don't bother with who sits next to whom. They don't have bridesmaids and best men and maids of honor and all the family drama that goes along with it. And, since alcohol is never served at traditional feasts, Indians don't have to worry about a drunk ex-boyfriend ruining the party with embarrassing disclosures.
I have yet to see an Indian bride throwing a diva-like tantrum because, honestly, if you are marrying into an Indian family, you better be on your best, modest, ideal daughter-in-law behavior on your wedding day. Most Indians are still deferential towards their parents and elders and, added to it all, if Mom and Dad are footing the bill for the entire shindig or at least a huge chunk of it, you would be grateful, isn't it?]

It is good that, amongst the cheesy, romantic Hollywood stuff, a smart writer and director could come up with a hilarious, ironical movie like "Bridesmaids" that causes the viewer to both pity and laugh at the leading ladies.
As a woman, I can't understand the wedding day craze. As a young girl, I did have different ideas of what Mr. Right would look like but I never actually fantasized about getting married, not as far as I can remember. In fact, I once remember having a nightmare about my wedding day, he he he.

I doubt most women around the world dream of wedding gowns and a five-star dinner party. Most would probably dream of a happy family with a home, children and dogs. Or maybe going to work and coming back to a nice home-cooked meal, preferably with a helping hand from the darling husband. Or being able to achieve something professionally and yet have a happy family to take vacations with.
They dream of a happy marriage, not necessarily a perfect wedding.
Of course, all girls want to look pretty and be admired on their special day. But beyond that, there definitely seems to be cultural conditioning at work.

In short, women have many of the same dreams as men do. They want to travel around the world, see the 'Aurora Borealis' and the pyramids. Many want to be acknowledged for their professional contributions. Many would like to make a positive difference in the world in some way. Some want to be famous. Some want to be rich and own a big house with a swimming pool and a luxury car.

III - Women in science, engineering and technical fields:

The stereotypes extend into the professional sphere as well. The geeky boys are into the technical/engineering stuff and women march off to non-technical stuff. At least, the majority do. At various IT firms that I have worked in, men outnumbered women in all the high-end technical positions such as development of software and I am not even counting the statistics for American women and foreign-born ones.
Are we unconsciously discouraging girls from building, tinkering and finding out how stuff works?

I haven't spent that much time around kids so I can't honestly say, given a certain kind of toy, if a boy or girl will be more inclined to play with it. But I know that girls are interested in science kits and Scrabble and brain-numbing puzzles, too. Maybe even Lego. The other day, I was in the Lego aisle, purchasing a birthday gift for my friend's son and I went, "Wow! This stuff looks cool, I should try to assemble one of these..."
In school, we girls participated in science projects and I remember trying out the experiment of wrapping an electric wire around a magnet with my father that resulted in somewhat dangerous results of sparking.
When I see the solar power kits and other science mini-projects for children these days, I feel a slight pang of longing. If only we had these things as children...

There was a Japanese series called 'Giant Robot' on the state-run Doordarshan in India that I watched when I was a child. A little boy commanded a gigantic robot to save them, using a control on his wrist watch, maybe it was a device that looked like a wrist watch. We children played 'Giant Robot' in the dusty playground outside our housing area just like we played 'Doctor, doctor' and housekeeping in kindergarten. My mother told me stories of the English scientist, George Stephenson and his steam engine invention, as she fed me dinner (I may have confused his story with James Watt).
I watched the puppetry series 'Fireball' on the same limited-channel television and dreamed of becoming an astronaut when I was barely learning to read and write. Girls would love to understand science, too. Maybe boys would play with dolls, too, who knows?

There is one point I concede, though. I have seen very few girls in my social circle that actually tinkered with stuff. My brother was fascinated by cars and mechanical instruments and would have loved to take them apart. Even today, he knows his computer stuff from the motherboard to security administration on the desktop. I loved science and was curious about a lot of things ranging from microprocessors to micro-organisms but never saw myself as a technical person, getting down on my hands and knees to fix broken machinery.
Sometimes, I was just scared to break things. Overall though, I am just not that inclined towards breaking apart and fixing equipment of any kind. Maybe girls are more afraid of experimenting because they worry about consequences. On the other hand, women get too complacent if there is a guy around to do things for them and the current disposable culture where the cost of fixing a TV is probably at least a quarter of what one would pay for a brand new one does not help that much either.

However, my mother is a Jill of all trades who would fix leaking taps and find use for every little stray object that she had saved, handle the finances and tutor my brother. She is a woman who is also politically savvy and avidly reads newspapers and magazines and knows the current political, economic and social climate. Unfortunately, she grew up in an age when women were not encouraged to go out and work and get advanced degrees. For a home maker, she has been a fiery, intellectual one and I owe a lot of my achievements to her prodding and encouragement.

IV - Prejudice in the office and soft technical environments:

When I started on my first job at a software company, I was told bluntly by a somewhat cocky young man that women are simply not as good when it comes to technical things and another female coworker agreed with him. If this were quantum physics or rocket science or even a large boiler plate factory, one would probably have to possess some outstanding technical chops to shine. Ditto for a hardcore software product development firm like Google or Apple. However, this was a small, services-oriented software company where young college graduates with hardly any experience were launching their careers. This young man was probably not that much far ahead as compared to some of his female peers yet the notion that the male brain is inherently superior, existed.

In the geek movie, "Social Network", girls were just party companions and freeloaders, arm candy for the dudes who changed Web history. Of course, keeping in account actual events, women may not have had much of a role in Facebook's or Napster's early days. However, it was sad to see most of the girls depicted as little more than the stereotypical, hard partying, vacuous college girl as aptly captured by another Huffington Post journalist here.

I've read about the 10,000 hours rule in Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers. If you practice any craft for 10,000 hours, working on your weaknesses, you will get better at it. Talent does matter but by itself, it does not amount to much. Most of the brilliant programmers I've seen started writing code while they were still in school so by the time they are in their 20s, they are far ahead of the pack that simply graduated from college with a degree in computer science but never actually developed a single application.

Women who are truly interested in programming should start tinkering around. You will get better. One day, you could launch a kick-ass product with a pink and purple background and Wall Street might be clamoring for you to go public.

It is not about getting better than men, it is about developing one's own innate abilities, gifts that we never even knew that we possessed.

What if we let children play with everything in sight? Maybe the boy you thought would become a great rocket scientist may end up being the next great Gandhi of human rights and the little princess you thought would get a degree and a regular office job might be the next Marie Curie or Kalpana Chawla.

Note: This post has undergone a minor correction and the last two images have been altered for correct Java programming syntax (it may not be perfect) since it was last published - a few minutes ago.

A short story from me

2012-02-21T16:34:00.000-05:00

Last month, I participated in some creative story-telling on the site, "Backstage Unscripted", an excellent blog that is maintained by working and aspiring actors. This blog chronicles the challenges, the daily struggles and the passion of these young people who are trying every day to do what they love. I find it extremely inspiring.

The challenge was to pick up a photo from the list of images of orphaned shoe/s and spin a tale explaining how they came to be without their owners.

Here is my yarn on that site. Enjoy!

Love in the time of Prejudice and Cynicism

2012-02-21T00:19:00.006-05:00

The title of this post is inspired by the famous Gabriel Garcia Marquez novel, 'Love in the time of Cholera'.

Valentine's Day came and went by last week. For most of us in free, democratic countries and even some totalitarian states, it was an occasion to celebrate with our loved ones, to give and receive tokens of affection and in some cases, go through a wasteful ritual that felt more like duty than real love.

We should be thankful that we are able to freely express our feelings for another. Think of centuries past when gays were not allowed to show who they are, or for that matter transvestites or anybody else.
People of different races could not marry each other when slavery was commonplace.
Openly showing attraction for a person of the same gender could get you killed a few hundred years ago. Even today, homosexuality is a crime in many countries. [And then there are some countries where masturbation and sodomy are still punishable offenses in some countries because of religion or just because of archaic laws that have never undergone a modern revision.]

Sadly, even in places where the law is enlightened and truly values individual liberty, culture and societal restrictions still influence and limit expression of love. India, the country where I was born and raised, has a plethora of religions, languages and castes (among Hindus). While these differences do not make a difference in daily civic life or working life, it is a deal breaker when it comes to matrimony.

Things have changed in India, at least in the urban metro areas but a lot still remains the same. Arranged marriages typically are essentially matches made between couples who hail from the same caste, linguistic community and religion. A note about arranged marriages for my non-Indian readers though: arranged marriages are no longer just parents deciding whom their children marry, rather, it is more of a matchmaking carried out by family members and the potential bride and groom do date at least long distance over the phone or internet before they tie the knot. Whether this always results in true love is a moot point.
For many young people, though, there are obstacles to overcome such as parental opposition when they fall in love with someone who is not from their background. The law of the land does not impose any restrictions on whom one can date or marry but family sometimes does.

That is why there are umpteen Bollywood movies made with story lines that revolve around the theme of falling in love with someone whom one's parents or one's sweetheart's parents do not approve of.
For all its glamor and emotional dialogues, Bollywood rarely mentions the word 'caste'. Heck, even a movie like 'Bombay' that dealt with the romance of a Hindu guy with a Muslim girl against the backdrop of the Mumbai (then known as Bombay) blasts and riots in the years 1992-1993, rarely gets made. That movie did irk some people who went berserk claiming that it offended their religious sentiments.

So what you get is a rich boy-poor girl story or the girl being already pledged/betrothed to someone else as in 'Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge' or 'Dil To Pagal Hai' and the song-dance drama that follows with either the hero's charms winning hearts or just plain dumb luck.
However, things have come a long way now from the ultra-submissive to the ultra-rebellious with extra-marital affairs and the main characters leaving their marriage for someone else (Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna) and live-in relationships (Salaam Namaste).
In real life, too, upper-crust and middle class Indians who live away from their parents have live-in relationships and love marriages have become more common in metro areas. However, in some villages, unfortunately, young lovers are murdered for dishonoring their families or going outside the status quo. Romeos and Juliets still exist, tragically...
That was about trying to merge love and the institution of marriage.

Then there is love that challenges every social norm.

Today, in progressive, enlightened societies such as in Western countries, love outside the boundaries of marriage is condemned. People try to 'work it out' in their marriages, to affair-proof their unions but falling in love with someone else when still married is a taboo, a tragic situation which one just has to silently suffer or try to get over. I do think that cheating on your partner is wrong and one should be honest with one's significant other when something like this happens.

Is it really possible to make oneself so committed to one person that one does not even entertain the thought of another?
Are our relationships merely a reflection of our deepest needs or our religious beliefs and influences of popular culture?

On the other hand, I personally feel that there is an invisible, mysterious spark that binds two souls together. When that is present, people overcome even seemingly insurmountable obstacles such as addiction or family and economic issues.
Mira Kirschenbaum has explained this beautifully is her book, "Is He Mr. Right?". She calls this factor 'chemistry' based on different dimensions. As she says, when the chemistry is not present, no amount of compatibility will compensate.

Some people are now moving on to polyamory while still staying married to a single partner. Polygamy and polyandry are not legal in most places but no law or government can legislate whom the heart should open up to and how many people a person can love.

There is a saying in Urdu that is featured in one of the songs of the film 'Dil Se' that says,
"Ishq par zor nahin
Hai woh aatish ghalib,
Jo lagaaye na lage,
Jo bujhaaye na bujhe."

The translation is roughly: There is no force upon love, it is a spark that cannot be struck deliberately and cannot be extinguished deliberately.

Psychologists and scientists try to explain love in terms of DNA, evolution, brain chemistry and a whole lot of factors but they still have not been able to explain what that spark is, why we feel so powerfully for someone and how each love is so different. There are some loves that are sexually powerful, some that are intellectually potent, some that are emotionally soulful, some who are equal in every department. Some loves fade away with time, there are some that we can't let go of and they live in our hearts forever. In one of my previous posts, I compared each human being to a chemical element and the relationship between two people as a compound that is unique just like the people. It is really hard, probably impossible, to cook up a formula for everlasting love.
Relationships do take effort but good relationships and particularly those that are romantic, are not really so much hard work that it feels like work.

I was reading Paulo Coelho's novel, 'The Witch of Portobello' which is an eye-opening story based on spirituality and philosophy, somewhat in between 'The Da Vinci Code' and a biography.

In it, one of the characters says about love,
"... People either feel it or they don't, and there isn't a force in the world that can make them feel it. We can pretend that we love each other. We can get used to each other. We can live a whole lifetime of friendship and complicity, we can bring up children, have sex every night, reach orgasm, and still feel that there's a terrible emptiness about it all, that something important is missing... ".

That is why I feel that articles like those in Psychology Today, "Are you with the right mate?" that say that basically any decent husband/wife who is not abusive, habitually unfaithful or addicted to something can be Mr. or Ms. Right if you put in the effort and stop fantasizing about the ideal relationship, seem to be missing something. All our friendships are not equally close or deep so why expect that all romantic relationships that fit some criteria are equally loving, good and deep?

I am a cheerleader for lifelong marriages that are based on true intimacy - emotional, intellectual, physical and spiritual but don't agree with the camp that says that hey, you did date this guy/girl so how come you did not find anything amiss/incompatible then? There are some issues that surface after living together for years, there are ways we change that we could have probably never imagined and life itself is unpredictable just like people.

The biggest struggle in a society that is free enough to allow everyone to choose their partners regardless of religion, race, ethnicity or even sexual orientation, is how to reconcile the fact that sometimes, lifelong togetherness in love is shattered, with the idealistic notion that love conquers all.

We do not understand love fully just like we do not understand the Universe or the soul or that Divine consciousness called God.

May peace and true love be with you all throughout your lives...

**********************************************************************************

"Ishq par zor nahin

Hai woh aatish ghalib,

Jo lagaaye na lage,

Jo bujhaaye na bujhe."

These are lines from the famous Urdu poet, Mirza Ghalib, as explained on many sites on the Internet. I haven't provided a single reference because there are many.

**********************************************************************************

Note: There is a correction needed in this post. I mixed up the words, 'arcane' and 'archaic'. I meant to say outdated laws, so the correct word should have been 'archaic' instead of what I had typed in -'arcane'.

For further reference, please visit Dictionary.com:

ar·cane

ar·cha·ic

Sorry for the inconvenience. Thanks.

Death and this fragile life...

2012-02-08T21:02:00.003-05:00

Today, I got to know the really sad news about the death of the husband of one of my friends.

I was reading this post by Steve Pavlina - Making Peace with Death. The death of someone one knows or a major natural disaster always tends to make one more aware of one's mortality. Just the other day, I was also thinking, just like Steve Pavlina had mentioned, how insignificant our time on this earth really is. We are just a blip on the cosmic radar.

Above all, death makes us question our integrity and compassion towards others. If we had a truly loving relationship with the deceased, we at least have the satisfaction of having made him/her happy while he/she was alive.

I remember reading in C.Rajagopalachari's version of the Indian epic, "Mahabharatha", Yudhishthira, says something to the effect that everyday people die on this earth, yet we don't believe that it could be our turn.

Steve Jobs' famous Stanford commencement speech says - Death will soon clear us away from this planet, too, to make way for the new.

What are we doing with our lives and how are we treating our loved ones that we would regret from the Great Beyond?

In the meantime, my heart and prayers are with my friend and her family and all those who have lost very dear ones, especially the ones that have died with many potential years still left unlived.