There's a beauty that's easy to overlook —one that doesn't announce itself with fanfare, fireworks, or applause. It doesn't trend, but it transforms the human heart, heals families, mends communities, and mirrors the very nature of God. That beauty lies in forgiveness.

Forgiveness isn't a fleeting choice; it's a holy and necessary skill. In the book How to Know a Person, David Brooks says it can be developed like any other. It's not about avoiding pain; it's about choosing love in the midst of it. It's the freedom to release someone because we've been set free.

What Forgiveness Really Is.

Tim Keller describes forgiveness as absorbing the cost of someone's wrong instead of making them pay. We confess the offense, ignore the wound, and resist the urge to retaliate or seek emotional repayment. This is how we imitate Jesus, who bore our sins not by condemning us but by carrying the weight of our wrongs on the cross (Isaiah 53:5; Colossians 3:13).

Forgiveness is never an easy task; it demands a cost.

We relinquish our right to revenge, gossip, and rehearse the offense until we're emotionally drained. What emerges in its place: peace, clarity, tenderness, and freedom.

R.T. Kendall calls this Total Forgiveness. Total forgiveness is not partial or polite but a full-hearted, supernatural release. God enables us to do it. It's when we genuinely wish another person well, even if they never apologize, even if the consequences persist. We cease recounting what they did, stop hoping for punishment, and start praying, "God bless them."

It's not an easy path, but it's achievable.

Forgiveness Is Freedom.

Over the years, through my tears and walking with others, I've realized that forgiveness liberates me regardless of its effect on others.

Here's what we know, it's easy to cling to bitterness, believing it protects us. But it doesn't. It poisons our heart soil and distorts our perception of others. We become self-protective, defensive, and closed off.

David Brooks emphasizes the significance of forgiveness as a skill we all need to learn. It's a necessary piece for a society to flourish. Without forgiveness, we can define ourselves by our hurts, constantly telling the story of pain that has become our identity. However, forgiveness changes this storyline, presenting a more hopeful and wholehearted one where love triumphs.

When we forgive, we assert that pain does not hold the final say; God does. And when He speaks, His words radiate mercy, healing, and freedom.

Let me share some surprising benefits I've experienced and observed in others through the act of forgiving freely:

• Clearer Thinking: Bitterness can cloud our judgment, but forgiveness opens our hearts to wisdom.

• Better Emotional Energy: Holding onto a grievance is exhausting, but letting go brings new strength.

• Healthier Identity: Forgiveness reminds us of who we are, not just what we or others did.

• Deeper Connection with God: By forgiving, we join Jesus in His most extreme expression of love (Luke 23:34).

• Healing in Relationships: Forgiveness provides more wholeness even if relationships remain unchanged.

• Growing Humility: Forgiveness is more fascinated with God's mercy than we are our own pain.

When we forgive freely and live forgiven, we become the people who change rooms without saying a word. This is not because we are perfect but because we have allowed mercy to powerfully work.

How do we practice forgiveness?

• Name the Hurt: Don't minimize the pain; tell the truth and invite God into it.

• Release the Offender: In prayer, surrender your desire to get even or to be proven right.

• Pray and Declare Good Things: Ask God to bless the offender, even through tears.

• Repeat as Needed: Forgiveness may require repeated efforts, and that's perfectly okay.

• Remain Anchored in Grace: Remember that you are not doing this alone; you are doing it with Jesus, the ultimate forgiver.

The Father’s good news is actively transforming our lives and shaping our experiences and character. When we choose to forgive, we love like Jesus.

Remember, when we forgive freely, we take back our lives—not just the life we had before the wound, but a life transformed by grace, seasoned with mercy, and shining with enduring beauty.

Let forgiveness and mercy have the final word.

— Lance

Photo by Mohammad Rahimi on Unsplash

Sometimes, I tell people, “I’m not the son of a prophet, but I am the son of a painter.” My dad was a painter and was very good at it for many years. I was not. One thing my dad taught me when painting is to “blend the paint.” We blend the paint using the same color and overlapping the paint with layering strokes to create a seamless, beautiful finish. I’m telling you about blending the same paint color because that’s the principle I use in communicating and leading. I pull thoughts from one week and share them again to blend one thought with the next, hoping to offer others a clear, helpful, and inspirational message. Repetition is the price of wisdom — what we revisit, we remember; what we remember, we can live consistently.

This way of shepherding, leading, and serving others is one way that I seek to embody Jesus’s words in Matthew 7:24-27. In this passage, Jesus tells the story of two people. The one who builds their life on the sand is foolish. The other who builds their life on the rock is wise. The foolish and wise builders hear the exact words and face the same circumstances, but the difference is what they do with what they hear. The wise builder acts upon the words and puts them into practice; the foolish person does not. Modern neuroscience reminds us that our brain can experience renewal. From a psychological and neurological viewpoint, repetition creates new neural pathways. When we repeatedly expose ourselves to truth, we rewire our brains, changing our internal operating system so that truth becomes our default instead of lies, fear, shame, or timidity. The call “to remember” fills the Bible (Deuteronomy 6, Psalms 78 and 103, 2 Peter 1). We know our hearts are prone to wander, forget, and replace truth with lies. Today, I talked to a dear sister in Christ who has followed Jesus for decades. In her honest assessment of how she’s doing, she noted, “The Lord has been reminding me of things that I already knew and have lost sight of.” I hope that each of us will take time to heed the words of Jesus in Matthew 7, act upon His words and truths, and “blend truth upon truth” like “blending paint” because repetition is the price of wisdom — what we revisit, we remember; what we remember, we can live consistently.

Furthermore, let me offer one more important, valuable nugget. Truth is not just information; it’s relational. Jesus defines himself as The Truth. We don’t have a relationship with a set of objective statements. We have a relationship with a man who fully embodies statements of truth because they express His very being. Truth needs to be experienced relationally (the Bible calls this hesed), not just intellectually. In doing so, truth reshapes our identity, heals our deep wounds, and empowers us to be “all in” with God and His mission.

Repetition is the price of wisdom, as it reinforces truth over time, much like blending paint requires layering to create a seamless unified finish; both processes reveal that the steady, consistent application of truth leads to transformation and empowerment.

The Lord and His peace be upon you!

479 Words — 1m 55s

We all encounter challenges and unfairness as we search for a meaningful life. A wise person once said, "Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it." At times, we can feel so overwhelmed by our struggles that it's hard to find the strength—mentally, emotionally, and spiritually—to maintain a hopeful attitude. This attitude is essential because it enriches our lives, allows us to respond wisely and kindly, and helps us support others by making a difference in their lives.

Every day, we choose a variety of attitudes. I encourage us to live with a growth attitude versus a fixed attitude. A fixed attitude is a strict way of thinking that withstands change, growth, or new viewpoints. It often arises from a belief that abilities, circumstances, or personal traits are unchangeable. This belief leads to avoidance of challenges, defensiveness against feedback, and a fear of failure. A growth attitude is a view that welcomes wisdom, resilience, and adaptability, believing that abilities and character can grow through struggle, experience, and persistence. It sees challenges as opportunities, values feedback, and stays open-minded to new opportunities for progress. Embrace challenges as stepping stones to growth, turning obstacles into opportunities!

As we strive to cultivate a growth attitude that embraces challenges and seeks personal development, it's essential to ground this mindset in the teachings of Jesus and the wisdom found in God's word, providing us with a solid foundation for our journey. As followers of Jesus, how do we anchor and tether our growth attitude to the word of God so that the power or force of our own will does not limit our approach toward life? Here's a chart that can help you:

Here are questions to help you transition from a fixed attitude to a growth attitude:

1. Can you identify a mistake you've made that taught you something valuable? (This question helps to foster resilience and the idea that setbacks can lead to improvements.)

2. What challenges have you faced recently, and how can you view them as opportunities for growth? (This question encourages reflection on current struggles and helps shift the perspective towards seeing them as growth opportunities.)

3. What is one skill or area of knowledge you'd like to develop further, and what steps can you take to pursue that growth? (This question promotes a proactive approach to learning and continuous development.)

4. How can you reframe negative feedback you’ve received as constructive criticism that can help you improve? (This question encourages openness to input and helps see it as a tool for personal development rather than a setback.)

Adopting a growth attitude grounded in Jesus' teachings and God's wisdom encourages us to embrace challenges, view responsibility as essential for growth, and remain resilient in the face of setbacks. This ultimately enhances our personal development and ability to support others.

The Lord and His peace be upon you!

:: Lance

Dear Friends,

We agree that beneficial church leadership isn't just a good idea—it's essential, and healthy church leadership must learn to wisely, lovingly, and steadfastly manage the tension between embracing our human frailty and weakness (and being discipled) and being called living examples. Healthy church leadership is not an accident we stumble into but the result of prayer, collaboration, communal conversations, and intentionality. Healthy church leadership happens when a group of people commits to embodying the way of Jesus together. We value diversity, not uniformity. We value interdependence, not co-dependence or independence. We're not merely operating an organization; we're stewarding something sacred, a sampling of God's ekklesia, His flock, His house, the people of God -- Saints! If we've learned anything from the failures of well-known leaders, it's that charisma without character is unsafe, unstable, and hazardous. 

Like some of you, I’ve been up close and personal with amazing men and women of God, filled with the Holy Spirit, operating in gifts, faithfully shepherding God’s people, and committed to abiding in Jesus, bearing the fruit of the Spirit. They have withstood the constant temptation of the flesh and overcome gossip, slander, name-calling, and divisive rhetoric. They chose humility over power. They chose anonymity over popularity. They have proven to be mature in their most holy faith, not by demonstrating gifts, but by their hopeful perseverance through pain, sorrow, and tribulation. They chose love, the greatest of them all. Also, like you, I’ve been up close and personal to the moral failures of others. The pain hits deep, and the disillusionment is real. Unfortunately, society has become too familiar with church leadership corruption. Their fall—not due to a lack of gifting but because of a lack of moral authority, personal responsibility, and organizational accountability- has been witnessed too often. The past few years have been sobering and serve as a trumpet call to those with ears to hear. These stories serve as reminders that toxic systems produce toxic results.

When power goes unchecked, truth is silenced, and correction is ignored, destruction follows. It's not only the leaders who suffer but also the people they serve. Too many times, we hear, "They would never do that. Look at the anointing in their life. Look how God is using them. I know them. Others are lying. The devil is just trying to stop what God is doing." To be honest, this conversation is exhausting. It's easy to feel weighed down by all the brokenness, withdraw, and become cynical. Let's be better. Let's resist spiritually bypassing the complex issues surrounding the unique calling of priests and shepherds. 

Allen Hood, in his written apology to the IHOP-KC community and his followers, puts it plainly: "Over the past year or so, I have undergone a massive learning curve regarding the crucial role that media and social media play in holding ministers and organizations accountable for clergy sexual abuse and its mishandling. Celebrity Christianity and the rise of independent churches and ministries have created powerful, charismatic leaders with little to no accountability. Victims and their advocates are continually scrutinized and demonized by these leaders. At the same time, there is little scrutiny of the unchecked power of these leaders, their deficient church governance structures, or the regular covering up of sin by those with the most to lose from an influential leader's fall."

Part of me reads the headlines and says, “Thank God that’s not us.” Another part of me feels the punches the Body of Christ is taking. Still, another part of me, maybe a wiser voice within, says, “Lance, what can we learn from the unfortunate mistakes of others? How will their failures serve others’ faithfulness?” This moment is about learning, respect, listening, deep listening, and taking action, not throwing stones. It’s essential to ask, "What kind of people do we want to be?" Jesus—His kingdom, values, heart, and mission are where we find the answers to this question, not in personal preferences or cultural trends. We must embody love and truth, mercy and justice, empowerment and servanthood, accountability and responsibility. Love without truth isn't love—it's enabling. Justice without mercy isn't justice—it's punishment. Authentic leadership empowers others, not just the leader, and servanthood isn't a strategy—it's the very nature of Jesus. 

Recently, I have been leading a conversation with our pastoral team regarding the qualification of the eldership as identified in 1 and 2 Timothy and Titus. In addition, I have developed a series of more heart-provoking questions for my one-on-one conversations with each of the pastors on my team. Lastly, I am committing to practicing regular fellowship with my board members so that should there be a weakness in my character that is damaging me, my wife, my family, and the church, the Board I serve can address it and help me. 

Your leaders meetings, conversations, shared meals, and other moments are sacred. They offer you a chance to connect as you share your hearts, build authentic relationships, and provide others with the empowering covering they deserve to release God's anointing in His people. We are here to serve something greater than ourselves—to create a Kingdom culture where people thrive under Christ's leadership. Be a Kingdom family of families.

So, let's not settle. Let's build integrity, lead with humility, honesty, and transparency, and create a culture where correction is welcomed, not feared. If you need a friend to share with, message me. 

Let's boldly declare: Jesus is King and Lord, and His way is the only way worth following.

The Lord and His peace be upon you!

:: Lance

Jesus’s half-brother, James, alludes to the reality that if we believe in God, it’s no big deal because even demons believe in God (James 2:19). Yet, what you and I know to be true is that our most holy faith has been devilishly diluted to mean nothing more than intellectual assent or agreement. Based upon my study of the scriptures regarding this essential theme, “Faith is an active and relational trust in God’s nature and character that transforms both us and our way of living.” God is breathing fresh life into many of us. One result is that many of us are experiencing a renewal of our love for King Jesus, which inspires a life of Kingdom mission and purpose, deeply anchored in faith. We know we experience a meaningful and rich life when we live for a cause bigger than ourselves. This is Peter’s story in John 21. Peter returns to the comfortable and competent fishing work after his abysmal failure and denial of Jesus (predicted by Jesus). We each know how tempting it is to return to what’s easy and familiar when experiencing difficulty or having tasted failure and sin. So what happens to our paralyzed faith when we return to the familiar and easy? Jesus comes looking for us.

I have to tell you, I love this. When I was a young, immature follower of King Jesus, every time I sinned and failed, I would experience paralysis of my faith. Praying was hard. Trusting I was saved was hard. Coming out of the shadows of disqualification and shame was hard. It wasn't easy. We all know this to be true. So, let’s take a moment and rejoice, celebrate, and be happy that Jesus comes to you, regardless of where you are in your failure, injured identity, wounded purpose, and disqualified soul. He pursues you and me. Hallelujah! Based upon Peter’s story in John 21, I wonder what supernatural thing God is doing in your life right now, revealing himself, His grace, mercy, love, and wisdom. Jesus came to Peter, revealed Himself, and initiated a conversation with Peter. He is doing the same for me and you. Why is this important? Because love energizes faith. Love comes before purpose. Don’t get that mixed up. A renewed passion for King Jesus inspires a life of Kingdom mission and purpose, deeply anchored in faith, not failure, shame, or disqualification. I’m very excited about God being at work in our church family. Don’t miss out on what He is doing. I challenge you to invite 2 or 3 close family members or friends you have and ask them to be brutally honest with you and show you where your hidden failures, fears, and disqualifications are hindering your willingness to step out, take risks, and partner with God and His mission. I promise, like Peter, you are not the only one fishing (doing what’s comfortable and easy). Look around. There are a lot of disappointed followers of Jesus fishing. Jump out of your safe boat and go towards Jesus. Good and godly things await! 

The Lord and His peace be upon you!

:: Lance

1. People don't know the Bible well enough to ask about it, care enough about scriptural truth, and have church leadership that is accessible but unwilling to listen and dialogue about it.

2. The quality of people's lives is influenced more by relationships than scripture.

Absolute truth is absolutely essential. After all, King Jesus talked about relationships and taught and showed us how to love one another. Scriptural truth, healthy emotional and relational skills, and godly self-control powerfully affect the quality of our relationships, thus affecting the quality of our lives. We all know that if a relationship is built on mistrust, trauma, co-dependency, or brokenness, then it's a relationship built on a crumbling foundation. The relationship will crash, and what remains in the rubble will be broken hearts, lives, and possibilities. We are designed and hardwired to flourish because we connect deeply and meaningfully with others. A genuine, life-giving connection requires vulnerability, but vulnerability is scary and too risky. We've done the "vulnerability thing" before and have gotten burned. You and I know this to be true because we compare our emotional and relational burn scars. We are like the scene in the classic 70s movie Jaws when the three men are hunting the Great White that's terrorizing the beach community. In a moment of rare connection, they compare shark bites, knife wounds, and injuries. What they all have in common is pain and scars. We can relate. We also have scars. Stories of broken friendships, struggling marriages, betrayal, and disconnection are too familiar. So what are we to do? Here are some suggestions:

1. Look in the mirror, humble yourself, repent, and turn to God so His grace will transform your life while you experience refreshing seasons. Bring the best, graceful version of you every day!

2. Protect connection. Protect connection. Protect connection. 

3. Forgive others quickly. Repeat as necessary.

4. Avoid gaslighting relationships. (If you don't know what "gaslighting" is, watch this informative and helpful video* by Dr. Henry Cloud). 

5. Establish healthy boundaries in your relationships. 

6. Seek out and participate in healing prayer, counseling, or therapy for yourself. 

7. Prioritize fervently loving God and others daily and contributing to things that matter. 

To be clear, I'm not advocating for scripture OR relationships. I'm advocating for relationships to embody scriptural truth that protects connection, acknowledges each person's dignity, honors their God-given identity, takes responsibility for their part in the relationship, and lovingly sacrifices to serve one another. 

[1] "We know what true love looks like because of Jesus. He gave His life for us and calls us to give our lives for our brothers and sisters." 1 John 3:16 — The Voice Translation. The Voice Bible Copyright © 2012 Thomas Nelson, Inc. The Voice™ translation © 2012 Ecclesia Bible Society. All rights reserved.

Banner Photo by Rosie Kerr on Unsplash

It must be natural for believers to long for a greater sense of God's presence in their lives; this is what I mean by "zeal for God." We have been given the fullness of God (Colossians 2:9-10). We are one with Christ and seated with Him (Ephesians 2:6). We have received the Spirit of Adoption and are co-heirs with Christ (Romans 8:15-17). We live with enduring faith (Romans 5:1-5) during difficult times. We rest in the finished work of Christ and receive His love (John 1:12) and all it gives us. We daily respond with surrendered, Spirit-filled, Spirit-led lives of faith (Romans 8, Galatians 5), abiding with King Jesus and His word (John 15:1-9), trusting the Father to lead us by His Spirit. We acknowledge, embrace, and commit to a Matthew 6:33 lifestyle. Matthew 6:33 (God's Word Translation) says, "But first, be concerned [seek] His kingdom and what has His approval. Then all these things will be provided for you." The Great Commandment (Matthew 22:37-40) reiterates the priority of actively loving our Trinitarian God above all other things. 

"Passive spiritual contentment"  is when we refuse to believe, pursue, or be zealous for more of King Jesus and His Kingdom than what we live in and choose to be content with what is. Sometimes, spiritual, passive contentment results from being infected by a virus of misordered priorities. Jesus addresses this in verses preceding His call to seek His kingdom and love Him above all things. Here's a summary of Matthew 6:25-32:

• Jesus advises against worrying about material needs like food, drink, and clothing, asserting that life is more than these things.

• He uses examples from nature, like birds and flowers, to illustrate God's care and provision, highlighting the futility of excessive worry.

In Paul's writing, as a prisoner from a prison cell, he says, "I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want" [1].

I am sharing this message to help us learn to live with godly contentment in our circumstances without sacrificing our zeal for God. God is good, and He is for us. The understandable care and worry associated with our circumstances can affect our everyday living, causing unhealthy, passive spiritual contentment instead of zeal to see the goodness of God in the land of our living. Stay hungry for God. Stay content in your circumstances because He is good. 

Photo Credit: Photo by Gift Habeshaw on Unsplash

Pride is the opposite of humility. It will not admit its insufficiencies, will do almost anything to keep itself hidden, and steadfastly believe that worth, value, and significance are only experienced through accomplishment, achievement, and the elevation of self. Repent? Pride has no reason to repent. Return to God? Of course not. Pride does not need God. However, humility maintains our value as image bearers of God while lowering and surrendering ourselves to God and others. An attitude of a healthy and well-grounded person is humility. 

Here are ten conclusions I have learned about humility. 

1. A person with a humble heart and attitude will approach relationships, conversations, difficulties, and opportunities as a learner.  

2. A person with a humble heart will have a teachable attitude. 

3. A person with a humble heart will admit their mistakes, wrongs, failures, and sins without blaming another.

4. A person with a humble heart lives with an attitude of gratitude. 

5. A person with a humble heart attracts the graceful, enabling work of King Jesus.

6. A person with a humble heart will work hard, admit mistakes, encourage others, receive criticism, and deflect praise to establish and protect relational connections. 

7. A person with a humble heart is secure in the love and identity of King Jesus. Therefore, personal and professional accomplishments are gifts from God done for the glory of God.

8. A person with a humble heart will forgive others and maintain healthy boundaries in relationships until trust is established and verified.

9. A person with a humble heart is willing to receive compliments, gifts, and encouragement from others because they know King Jesus wants to affirm his children. 

10. A person with a humble heart trusts that King Jesus and their relational community will give them healthy, constructive, and life-giving feedback.

The scriptures teach that we can ask God for all things, so it's common to hear people ask God to give them humility. I also remind us to "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you" James 4:10 NIV. Choose humility. Choose love. Choose to add value to others.  

Banner Photo Credit: Photo by E. Vitka on Unsplash

First, Joseph, Mary, and Jesus. Second, the Wise Men. When reading the account of Mary's conception, Joseph's learning of Mary's pregnancy, and the birth of Jesus, we notice that God gives Joseph four dreams. Each dream carries a specific point of direction and action. Secondly, after finding Jesus and worshipping Him, the wise men are warned in a dream not to return to Herod. Herod's desire to worship Jesus is false and a cover-up for his real intent: to kill Jesus, his rival threat and king. 

Five dreams within two sets of people are extraordinary! God's efforts to speak to these people are fantastic. Why does God do this?

1. God loves people and desires to forgive and dwell among us. 

2. God the Father sends God the Son in the power of God the Spirit. The Trinity fully involves itself in human beings' redemption, salvation, and transformation. 

3. God invites human beings to participate in the plans of heaven, thus demonstrating a "Heaven on Earth" reality. 

4. God protects His son Jesus, His plan for redemption, and the humans involved in this divine moment by giving warning dreams to Joseph and the Wise Men. 

During the Advent season, I want us to experience God's love for ourselves and others. Receive His forgiveness, give forgiveness and embrace His indwelling presence. Welcome the Trinity into our lives and contemplate what it means for us. Collaborate with God during these days by doing good, being generous, and sharing your testimony. Remember that God enables our life purpose with His protecting, promise-keeping might. 

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I just read an excellent little piece about Thanksgiving, faith, and growing up with atheist parents by Anne Lamott. Her story involves, later in life, sitting at the holiday table with family and saying grace. I won't recap her entire social media post, but reading her story ushered me back to my childhood when my immediate and extended family would gather hands and say grace. My maternal grandfather (Papa), with his baritone voice and larger-than-life pastoral persona, would say grace and give thanks. Reflecting on these moments, all over again, I can smell the food, hear the Thanksgiving parade on the television, recall adults talking about boring adult things, and put on an extra layer so we won't be too cold as we play tag in the sharp fall air. Then, a common question I frequently ask myself in the inner chambers of my most secretive thoughts comes to mind. Do you have questions that are not yet answered? Here's one of mine, "Why did I wait until I was 19 to become a born-again Christian?" It's perplexing to me why I waited until I was 19 because:

1. Both sets of my grandparents were pastors, so my family has a rich, long-standing Christian faith. 

2. My parents effectively grew up in church and are children of pastors. 

3. A few times, I attended a summer Vacation Bible School. 

4. My stepdad, mom, and I went to a local Pentecostal church for a few months in middle school. 

5. In the early months of my senior year in high school, a good friend tragically died in a single-car accident. This opened my heart and mind to the reality of death, the fragility of life, and something beyond this life. 

Growing up, "saying grace" only happened during the holidays because living and practicing the Christian faith was not normative to my upbringing. I don't blame anyone. It's just the way things were. John 6:44 (NIV) says, "No one can come to me [Jesus] unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them at the last day." I can't recall ever feeling "drawn" towards considering Jesus, faith, surrendering my life to God, or forgiveness. Maybe I was "drawn," I just can't remember it until that late summer day in August 1990. 

I say all this to highlight one question, "What truth, insight, or point of understanding is God illuminating for us, but we are too dull or blind to hear or see it?"  I was around Christianity many times and never considered becoming a Christian. I wonder what wonderful gift, opportunity, or growth moment God has for us, and we need our hearts awakened, our senses activated, our understanding illuminated, and our will surrendered to Jesus AGAIN. Please take a moment today and pray this with me, "Holy Spirit, show me what I can't see. Help me hear what I can't hear and understand what's outside my mind. Holy Spirit, assist me to live fully within all the good moments and promises you have for me. Enable me to be a faithful and honest witness of Jesus Christ and all His love. Enable me to share your gospel and serve others. Amen." 

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1. Remember, you are growing. What do each of us need to flourish? Let's offer that same kind of patience, understanding, support, and challenge to others. 

2. Relationally practice the 5 C's of Spiritual Companionship. Celebrate what you love and admire about the other. Care for them by staying attentive to their life journey and needs. Care for them with compassion and generosity. Coach them. Coaching is "Listen well; Ask, don't tell." Learn how to listen deeply, be emotionally present, reflect on what you hear the other person saying, and ask open-ended, curious questions to help another person discover and experience something helpful. Contribute something valuable to their life. Love wants to add value to another. The contribution may be the encouraging word, the caring act, or the listening ear. It may be offering a book, buying a meal, taking someone for coffee, etc. Challenge a person to be who they really are. No one becomes who they are called to be without a meaningful friendship or relationship. (Celebrate, Care, Coach, Contribute, Challenge)

3. Be patient with others without excusing irresponsible or hurtful behavior, attitudes, etc.  

4. Clarify expectations by utilizing this process: Be aware of your expectations. Make them realistic. Verbalize them. Agree upon them. 

5. Pray for them. Over and over again, the Bible clarifies that each follower of Jesus is in a sanctifying process. Personally, I don't believe this applies to only Jesus' followers. Life has a way of enrolling all of us into the "School of Development and Growth."

6. Learn how to resolve conflict and confront with a redemptive and growth purpose instead of a destructive verbal war. (I frequently discuss this topic in my leadership podcast here.)

We can contribute to another's flourishing and success or their demise and failure. Let's be the kind of people that others invite into their mess because they know they will receive what they need to grow and mature. Remember, the only ones immune from the process are dead, so if you are breathing, you are in a growth cycle. 

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My favorite holiday is Thanksgiving. Over the many years of my life, it consistently involved seeing extended family, playing Monopoly with my siblings and cousins late into the night, traveling, eating some of my favorite foods, playing in the fall leaves of Arkansas and Oklahoma, and feeling the joy and safety of being with family and friends. Another and more personal reason I love Thanksgiving is because I was born on Thanksgiving day. 

Many years after I became a disciple and follower of Jesus, I believe the Holy Spirit said something significant to me. He said, "Because you are born on Thanksgiving day, giving thanks will be a reliable gift that will help you consistently experience God's presence and have God's perspective. Also, thanksgiving will be a dependable spiritual weapon you must use in emotional and spiritual warfare."

These benefits, plus many others, are not for me only. The Bible is full of instructions for everyone to give thanks. For example:

• "Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever." Psalm 107:1 (NIV)

• "Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; for his steadfast love endures forever!" 1 Chronicles 16:34 (ESV)

• "And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:17 (NIV) 

• "Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NIV)

"Gratitude improves one’s outlook on life. Appreciating what you have can make you feel more optimistic and satisfied and experience less frustration, envy, and regret. It also tends to result in increased self-esteem and confidence, which also improves mood", says Courtney Allison.

Here are additional benefits:

1. Spiritual Enrichment -- "Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him; bless his name!" (Psalm 100:4, ESV) Expressing gratitude is a spiritual key, opening our hearts and minds to our union with the Father. Gratitude is the language of the soul, fostering a deeper connection with the Creator.

2. Emotional Well-being -- "A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones." (Proverbs 17:22, ESV) Giving thanks lifts our emotional state, enriching our spirits and nurturing a hopeful attitude.

3. Psychological Resilience -- "Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." (1 Thessalonians 5:18, ESV) The Apostle Paul's counsel to the Thessalonians reflects an enduring principle. Giving thanks, even in challenging circumstances, encourages resilience and trains the mind to have a perspective that navigates adversity with grace.

We all know that familial conflict, the death of family or friends, and financial stress can dampen the motivation to give thanks; I encourage you to make a choice, an intentional choice and verbalize to God and to others the many things for which you are thankful. Hurt, pain, anxiety, fear, and anger are readily present in society. Let's be grateful, hope reformers this holiday season, and offer others a chance to experience a taste of heaven on earth (in addition to the many flavors of Thanksgiving.)

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Everyone has a set of values (sometimes most easily discovered by the intensity of our emotions or need). An important question to consider is, have I named my values? Have I thought about what ideals are essential to me and what positive or negative effects they have upon me and others? What values are desirable both as a means to a life of significance and as an end in itself? What core attributes are essential to me, my family, my profession, and my calling? Core values serve as an objective third party designed to hold everyone accountable for a way of thinking and being. For example, when we examine the life of Jesus, His teachings, and repeated themes, we discover many of his values, such as love (of God, self, others, enemies), generosity, faith, obedience, abiding, etc.

From the beginning, we are created for intimacy because it’s the nature and love behavior of the Trinity. (Genesis 1:26-28). We govern, live, and lead from the place of love. It determines the quality of our responsibility because love is the highest motivation. Fast Forward to the days of Moses, we find him encountering the glory of God and asking for His presence to continue to go with them. God's presence is goodness and fullness of joy (Exodus 33:12). Fast Forward even further to the days of Kings and Judges, and we find Israel’s greatest King, the man of authority and power, known for bloodshed, extravagant worship, adultery, etc., crying for ONE THING, “to gaze, to seek and to behold” (Psalm 27:4). Go more forward several hundred years to the days of Jesus. Challenged by the law experts, they ask Jesus what the Greatest Commandment is. Jesus says it is to love God and others as you love yourself (Matthew 22:34). We find Jesus articulating his role in establishing a new lifestyle, the abiding life. We are in Him, and He is in us. His word is in us, making us clean (John 15). John repeatedly said that when we see Him, we see the Father. He is the exact representation of the Father (Hebrews 1:3). The role of the Holy Spirit, found in John 14-16, is to awaken us to our position as Sons and Daughters of God. With a relational inheritance, we no longer live as enslaved people but as children of God (Romans 8:15-17, Galatians 4:4-7). 

In summary, the role of the Father is to reconcile us to live in intimacy with Him. The role of the Son is to save us and model a life of intimacy with God. The role of the Spirit is to awaken our dead spirits, baptize us in Christ, and guide us into the truth of the new life as sons and daughters in the Kingdom. God will transform us through the Spirit of wisdom and revelation to reveal God's love. He empowers us to live as adopted sons and daughters of God with the capacity to disciple and reproduce this Kingdom life. Let’s live a life that demonstrates our unrelenting value for God’s presence.

[1] iPad App for Dictionary.com

I'm confident the Holy Spirit wants us to: 

1. Intentionally train the saints of God for a life of good and godly works (Eph. 2:10).

2. Implement a reproductive discipleship methodology (Matthew 28:18-20).

3. Invest in spiritual friendships. The church will grow healthier as we embrace smaller gatherings (Acts 2:42-47). Jesus spent approximately 8,000 hrs with his disciples. Two hours a week on Sunday is grossly insufficient to build a life that abides in Him. We need the support of close friends.

Participating in what the Holy Spirit is doing will require receiving and responding to His work within and among us. Recently, I shared about five scenarios (there are more, but I only had a sense of these 5). Each reveals a hardship that requires a response. 

1. Lazarus (John 11:44) - Lazarus represents those of us who are born again and experiencing the life of God. We are also still wrapped up in grave clothes. Grave clothes represent old ways of thinking, responding to life, relating to people, old belief systems, and habits. We are new creations in Christ. Engage in a friendship where your discipleship and sanctification can surface and shed the grave clothes. This story is about maturing into your identity.

2. Imprisoned (John 8:36) - I had a picture of people sitting in a prison cell, and the door was open. Some of us choose to stay in what's comfortable rather than take responsibility for the freedom given to us. We can't glorify Christ by fulfilling the work He has given us (John 17:4) if we stay in our prison. We are free yet live imprisoned. This story is about living free from sin and shame and for the glory of King Jesus.

3. Travail (1 Kings 18:42) - There will be moments when our fruitful, contemplative, regular praying will be insufficient. What God wants to do and how He is asking us to pray will require travail. Intensity is the only distinction I want to make between travail and our "normal" praying. God said He would send rain. Elijah's response is to physically position himself the way a pregnant woman will give birth, and he prays (travails). This story is about partnering with God for breakthroughs.

4. Costly sacrifice (1 Kings 18:30-35) - Water is the most precious resource in a three-year drought. Elijah collects the most valuable resource and pours it over the altar. I believe we are in a time when God asks for what's most costly and places it on the altar expecting God to meet us in supernatural ways. What is the "water" in your life that God asks you to put on the altar? This story is about experiencing the miraculous.

5. Confession (James 5:16) - I wish James didn't say what he said. It’s hard to hear and maybe harder to live. James connects aspects of our vitality and health to confessing sins to another person. The enemy does his best work in darkness. As long as our sins remain private and secretive we’ll be children of God living as prisoners of sin. Be wise about with whom you will share. There awaits a cleanness that boosts our confidence in living and praying. This story is about living with confidence, not arrogance.

Join me in asking King Jesus about these that apply to our life. 

Repent. Receive. Rejoice. Rise up! 

Recently I was encouraged by a verse from the Bible. During a moment of reflection and prayer, utilizing the verse given to me as a starting point, I reflected upon my life and how Jesus's love and presence have changed me as a person. The change is more than the natural aging process, learning from experience, etc. The difference is more fundamental to the core of who I am, what I believe about me and others, and my life's purpose. For most of us, it's challenging to step into inspirational ideas and beliefs about ourselves. If only life were as easy to live as all the quotable memes make it sound. 

Four qualities emerged during my time of reflection, and they serve as a spiritual and moral compass to help me go forward with Jesus and those I love. With an explanation for each word, I offer these for your consideration and application.

1. Glory - As made famous by the Westminster Catechism, the chief end of each person is to glorify God and to enjoy Him forever. Well-known Reformed pastor, John Piper, says, "The chief end of man is to glorify God BY enjoying Him forever." We are here because Someone greater than us offers us to live for something greater than us. In a world with increasing narcissism, self-promotion, and social media platform, it's easier to live for the fame of our name rather than for the fame of the One who sits above the heavens and rules with goodness, justice, and mercy. Live empowered by the One, for the One!

2. Truth - This quality is prone to change based on society's willingness to morph truth into whatever form is necessary to fit the culture's current passion. If truth is not objective, that is true for all people, in all places, at all times, then can we call it something other than the truth? The phrase "my truth" is widespread today but not new. I identify truth as an essential quality for a life of significance because the human heart flourishes best when governed by the order, laws, and principles of creation. Are we remaining faithful, genuine, and loyal to the working of God in our lives to accurately become who He says we are and therefore are enabled to do what He says we can do?

3. Meaning - Again, let me remind us that these four qualities emerged from a time of reflecting upon what it looks like to step into the invitations and promises from Jesus. I love this quality because it addresses a heart that is satisfied with its impact upon others. Philosophers, theologians, anthropologists, sociologists, and psychiatrists regularly remind society that what lies within the heart of every person is this, "Why am I here?" Maybe it takes a lifetime to answer this question. As a 50-something Christian man, I am learning that the quality of my life is equal to my ability to love the one in front of me fervently, whoever that may be. The soul is discontent when it's not adding value to others. Rest, peace, fun, beauty, and transcendence are necessary for the thirsty soul. They help us show up each day and offer the world our little piece of significance so that we can help another meet love, dignity, liberty, hope, life, healing, mercy, joy, etc.

4. Faith - This last quality (and they are not in any order of priority) is all about trust. It's challenging to be entrusted with wisdom and understanding when we are not trustworthy with mystery. You and I know this to be true, "Some things don't make sense. They are unfair and unjust." The "some things" are the loss of a job, a life-long illness, the death of a child, abuse, etc. Trusting in Jesus in every season of life positions us to live a life of significance. Daily showing up in the world depends not on the proper alignment of our circumstances but on our heart being properly aligned with the truth that Jesus is good, even when I don't understand.

I will pay attention to these four qualities over the next season of my life. What qualities are you paying attention to and why? 

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1. Ask Jesus to teach you to pray.

2. Begin practicing small prayers than can open big doors.

3. Have a regular prayer time each day (during a ride to work, while enjoying a morning coffee, taking an evening walk, or with a friend/spouse/family before evening bedtime).

4. Carry a bible verse or verses around in your pocket and pull it out a few times each day. Read it. Pray it.

5. Set the alarm on your device to remind you to pray. (I do this several times a day, and each alarm has a label for a different topic.)

6. Pray with a family member or friend a few times each week over the phone or in person.

7. When someone asks for prayer, pray right then (if possible), and then make a note to pray again later in the day or week.

8. Utilize your calendar to note big prayer moments such as job interviews, school test days, doctor appointments, etc.

9. Pray in the same space as often as possible. We will be amazed by the emotional attachment we can develop with an area because it's our "Bethel," where we meet God.

Friends, resist the relentless assault of a spirit of unbelief. Watch your faith and trust in God grow, as you pray with an attitude of unceasing prayer. 

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