Professional Management and Leadership Development blog

Stumbling Your Way to Success

Frank DuMar — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 12:52:36 -0400

On Tuesday, September 29, I had the opportunity to view Leadership in Turbulent Times, a webcast Presented by the Harvard University Alumni Association, with Harvard Business School Professor Nancy F. Koehn, who led a dynamic discussion on "effective and responsible leadership and how to create purpose, worth, dignity, and impact in a time of astounding change." Prof Koehn's address highlighted past and present leaders such as Abraham Lincoln, Ernest Shackleton, Oprah Winfrey, and Bono.

A number of points she made about the paths of great leaders through history resonated for me, particularly:

Most great leaders throughout history have stumbled into greatness and have discovered their purpose through failure. Often, great leaders have many more failures than successes. They see adversity as a means to grow, learn, explore and practice. Many great leaders do not find their truest calling until they're in their 50's or 60's.

Great leaders through the centuries practice discipline to grow and learn and they have patience - the willingness to wait and be at the intersection of hard work and trouble, until they find themselves at the right time, at the right moment to succeed. Many great leaders suffer through periods of doubt and insecurity. They work hard and stay the course.

If you get a chance, view the Leadership in Turbulent Times FREE webcast. And think about these questions:

Do you practice finding the positive aspects of adversity?

Can you accept your mistakes and learn with humility?

Can you get up once again after you fall?

Stumbling, Adversity and Challenge Help You Find Your Purpose

Frank DuMar — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 12:37:28 -0400

On Tuesday, September 29, I had the opportunity to view Leadership in Turbulent Times, a webcast Presented by the Harvard University Alumni Association, with Professor who led a dynamic discussion on effective and responsible leadership and how to create purpose, worth, dignity, and impact in a time of astounding change. Prof address highlighted such past and present leaders as Abraham Lincoln, Ernest Shackleton, Oprah Winfrey, and Bono.

A number of points she made about the paths of great leaders through history resonated for me, particularly:

Most great leaders throughout history have stumbled into greatness and have discovered their purpose through failure. Often, great leaders have many more failures than successes. They see adversity as a means to grow, learn, explore and practice. Many great leaders do not find their truest calling until they're in their 50's or 60's.

Great leaders through the centuries practice discipline to grow and learn and they have patience - the willingness to wait and be at the intersection of hard work and trouble, until they find themselves at the right time, at the right moment to succeed. Many great leaders suffer through periods of doubt and insecurity. They work hard and stay the course.

If you get a chance, view the Leadership in Turbulent Times FREE webcast. And think about these questions:

Do you practice finding the positive aspects of adversity?

Can you accept your mistakes and learn with humility?

Can you get up once again after you fall?

Are You Letting Other People's Talent Intimidate You?

Frank DuMar — Sat, 29 Aug 2009 12:33:01 -0400

When I work with successful people they always tell me when they were starting out there were others with more talent who seemed primed to be more successful.

Instead of letting other people’s talent intimidate them into not trying, and instead of letting their own self-perceived shortcomings limit their personal goals and vision, they simply worked harder, more enthusiastically, and more consistently to overcome their shortcomings and leverage their natural gifts.

Talent counts. But it doesn’t count for everything.

What are your talents?

What are your shortcomings?

Have you taken an inventory of these with a trusted friend, colleague, or mentor?

What is your personal vision of success?

Initiate this conversation with yourself and someone you like, trust and respect today.

Are you Feeling the Leadership Development Burn?

Frank DuMar — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 10:27:07 -0400

What am I working on in my leadership development? Does it feel easy? How do I know when I am developing?

When I am working on an issue, skill or development target I can tell by the amount of sweaty discomfort or frustration I’m feeling. I relate it to using your left hand if you are right hand dominant. Right now I’m working on improving my active listening skills. What I notice is that it’s uncomfortable for me to listen to someone when I am sure I have the answer to his problem. I'm a busy guy. I get impatient and just want to interrupt his rambling and with my “hit and run” solution and be done with it!

But active listening requires me to take time to focus on what people are saying, to acknowledge their insights and issues, and be willing to be patient, open-minded and reflective about my response. Sitting and actively listening like this - that's when I feel the burn. That's when I know I'm stretching myself. When I practice the skills of active listening effectively, we both feel satisfied with the encounter.

Are you working on something that’s making you sweat? Can you feel the burn? If not you may need to reach a little deeper, look a little harder and set your goals at a higher level. It is easy to fool ourselves and not be stretching.

~ Frank

Accountability and Support

Frank DuMar — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 16:39:07 -0500

I need to have strong accountability and support for personal development - why?

As you know, it is common to set a goal or a New Year’s resolution and never achieve it. Sometimes it’s because we were not in the right frame of mind when we made that declaration, and sometimes it is because we were not properly warmed up to commit to the goal. Usually it is because we have either not told anyone about it (in case it doesn’t work out) or haven’t asked for help from others when it broke down.

Just telling someone what you plan to do helps make you accountable. This way, someone else knows and will be watching for you to make that change. Sure, it puts some pressure on, but it also increases your chances of success. We need to get into the habit of making clear and realistic declarations aloud so that others are aware of our intentions. Yes, it would be nice to be paid to make the change like those Jenny Craig celebrity spokespeople, but the majority of us are not so lucky. Instead we need to step up and put our own accountability in place.

Step One of development is telling someone of your goal or plan.

Step Two is asking for help.

Why is this so hard?

People think it shows weakness when they need to ask for help for something that others may not need help for. Thousands of people make it possible for us to function in our daily lives. Think of all the people who grow our food, make our clothes, pump our gas, supply our water, heat our homes, and manufacture our medicines - and that only covers a handful of our basic necessities! But if you want to succeed in making the change or moving forward in your development, you will need to have support for that too. You WILL breakdown at some point - but the key is to have support in place so that when it happens, you will have the help to get back on track.

We put such a high value on independence that we sometimes forget the reality of the human experience. Look to the people you trust for support, and even though you might feel uncomfortable, try your best to accept it. In AA there is a sponsor who can be called when the person needs support in their sobriety. Often, the person chooses not to take that drink so that they don’t have to feel the shame of making that call to their sponsor, but if they call the sponsor after having taken a drink, the sponsor can motivate the person to start a new day and try again. But something that many forget is that the sponsor is also getting help by supporting the drinker in their sobriety. By helping other people, we become more understanding of other people’s positions or situations, we increase our self esteem because we feel our input is valued, and we are challenged, which helps our own personal development.

So if you are feeling weak when you ask for help, remind yourself that the second step to development is putting good support in place, and asking someone for help helps that person as well.

Take care,

Frank