Lee Flailmarch

Gone too soon

2019-01-13T22:16:00.000+08:00

Back in August of 2016 after my best friend Mines passed away, I created a private Spotify playlist named after her, of songs dealing with loss to help me cope with the pain. When a close friend's mom—Tita Mildred who was like a second mom to me—passed away last year, I renamed that playlist after her. Five days ago I donated blood to Nikka, a friend from work who, after losing her baby just a few moments after childbirth, was fighting for her life due to a ruptured liver. She lost that fight two days later and I found myself playing that same Spotify playlist again for comfort. Realizing that I may never have to be without this playlist and that changing its name to whomever recently died would just be too tedious and heartbreaking, I just renamed it "Gone Too Soon."

That's what these dear ones were. Gone too soon. Tita Mildred in her early 60s was the oldest of them but was a lot of times even more energetic than her daughter and me combined. Mines and I still haven't figured out what our souls are calling out for whenever we would get the "empty feeling" we'd meet most weekends to talk about. Jiji, a stray cat my ex-partner and I rescued in August last year, wasn't even three months old yet and was just with us for two short weeks when he died of dehydration. And Nikka. She has a nine-year old daughter from another man, had just married this funny, very personable guy who used to be a colleague, and they almost had a son. But just like that, four became two. And I, along with so many others who loved this sweet and gentle girl, mourn again.

Tita Mildred and one of her many dogs.

As we age—and this is a morbid thought—are we all just exponentially growing closer to death and therefore witnessing and almost palpably feeling much more of it around us? Or was the mortality rate the same when we were younger, we just didn't care then, maybe because our parents were there to protect us from such bad news?

I'm a 31-year-old who lives alone but still has a complete family in my hometown, sometimes experiences an existential crisis and, on occasions that seem to be getting more and more frequent, hear about the death of someone dear to me. But most nights I get by with just a glass of wine and a music playlist I made for the specific mood I'm having. Mines was as close to me as a sister and I still feel the hole that she left behind in her passing. I dread the time when balms like wine and a customized playlist wouldn't be enough for me to find solace in anymore after the death of someone even closer.

Words you might have been mispronouncing or misusing since grade school

2018-11-18T00:04:00.001+08:00

This has been in my drafts for a while now, but two nights ago at a bridal shower, a colleague pronounced Versace correctly ("verSAcheh," not "verSAchee") when he referred to Bruno Mars' song "Versace on the Floor" (I swooned) and the friend for whom we were throwing the bridal shower understood what I meant when I said Thames with the correct pronunciation ("tems"). And she even said Thames properly too (swooned again).

So two correctly pronounced words, not the more frequent mispronunciations, actually made me finally publish this post. This is a reminder that a lot of times, simply pronouncing things and using words and phrases right can make you seem like a smarter person. And cause guys like me to swoon.

Toll

Most commonly used when referring to toll gates and the fees paid when going past them. And toll-free hotlines. It should be pronounced to rhyme with "coal." Unless katropa mo 'yung gate, it is not pronounced the same as "tall."

Roll
Similar to "toll," it is not pronounced like it rhymes with "tall."

Whole

Correct pronunciation same as "toll" and "roll." It is not pronounced like it rhymes with "rule," although you might have been taught to say it that way by school teachers who demanded you "bring out one HOOL sheet of paper" during exams.

Centennial
"CenTENnial," not "cenTEENnial." I hear the mispronunciation a lot when I'm in my hometown in Cavite, because there's a Centennial Road beside which a lot of businesses are now being built. Also when there are centennial anniversaries.

Firm

There really is nothing that rhymes with how this word is incorrectly pronounced, which should be an indication why it shouldn't be said that way. It's pronounced like "fur" but add an "m" after.

Confirm

See above. I hear this a lot in the call center setting. "Ma'am, conFEERM ko lang po ang inyong address for the delivery." Cringe.

Strawberry

You either pronounce the "e" or you don't, but the "berry" part should not be pronounced like "furry."

Bury

Also not pronounced like "furry" but rather exactly like "berry."

Intermittent
Very commonly heard nowadays due to the popularity of intermittent fasting. It's so often mispronounced, though it's just stress on the wrong syllable (inTERmittent), that I actually started to doubt my knowledge of how it should be pronounced (INtermittent).

Irregardless

Treat this word like a multiplication equation. If "regard" is a positive number and "ir" and "less" are negative numbers, then multiplying all three of them will yield a positive number, which isn't the message "regardless," a.k.a. the word you should really be using, is portraying. If you use the word "irregardless," you might as well have used "with regard to."

Not unless
Same as with "irregardless." "Unless" is a negative number and although "not" is a negative word, let's just say that in this equation it is a positive number. Multiplying these two numbers will yield a negative number, which isn't the message you want to be portraying in your use of the term "unless." Adding "not" basically cancels out the intent of your use of "unless."

Fill up

If you mean to fill a pitcher with water, then go ahead and use "fill up" (though some might argue that, one, like with "stand up" the preposition "up" is unnecessary, as there is no other direction you could be going if you're getting up from being seated, and two, there is no such thing as "fill down" anyway). But if you mean to accomplish a form, you should really be saying "fill out." "Fill in" is acceptable too, to mean the filling in of the boxes in a form.

31

2018-11-17T19:41:00.000+08:00

Getting old has never been what I've dreaded about the coming of my birthday. It's always been the "how will I be greeted?" part. And since I usually try to go on leave from work on my birthday and I don't live with my family anymore, this mostly happens via social media. Several years ago, when Facebook still allowed it, I would change my birthday on my profile to something months away from my actual birthday. This way, when it comes, my connections won't be notified about it. And because I don't allow posting on my wall, people who truly know when my birthday is would message me privately instead.

I firmly believe that how we behave on social media should make sense if that were to be how we behaved in real life. A birthday greeting through private message makes sense, because that's just between the greeter and you. It's more genuine and sincere. A birthday greeting on your Facebook timeline, on the other hand? That, to me, is the equivalent of shouting "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" at you while you're in a crowded room. People who don't even know it's your birthday would then greet you too (the equivalent of commenting on Facebook) and those who probably couldn't care less would smile and applaud (liking or reacting) just so they don't seem unsympathetic. Is there anything wrong with greeting someone on their Facebook timeline? Not really. Maybe it's just not for an introvert like me. Or I just feel like it's too impersonal, like it's only being done to show off that they remembered my birthday. And maybe there's also the thought that, is that it, a few taps on your phone is all I'm gonna get from you on my birthday?

I'm not really a materialistic person when it comes to receiving gifts, for my birthday or otherwise. In fact, I'd rather not receive a gift at all than receive a poorly conceived or improperly given one. I believe in the old adage "It's the thought that counts," and I think part of that should be knowing the recipient well enough to be sure they'll appreciate the gift. I always give a lot of thought to the presents I give people, even the way I give it to them. So when a good friend sent me a large cake at work two years ago (I wasn't able to go on leave then), I actually got mad. Because she and I worked in the same place, she could have just given it to me after work. Or she could have had it delivered to my apartment. I didn't want people to know it was my birthday—she knew this—because I didn't want any obligatory greetings from people. If I'm important enough for you to know my birthday, you'll greet me on my special day without needing Facebook or someone else's greeting me first to remind you. I felt like, man, by putting me under all that stress of having to hide the cake from everyone especially during the time I had to go home, this friend who sent me this cake didn't know me well enough at all.

Maybe I've matured a lot more since that cake incident, because in hindsight I admit it was a little bit neurotic of me how I reacted. Or it could be that my friends and colleagues know me better now. I received five birthday cakes this year, which was the most number of cakes I've ever gotten in celebration of my being born, and I actually appreciated all of them, including how they were given to me (it helped a bit that I knew what was coming for two of those cakes—sorry, guys, haha). Anyway, thanks to everyone who made my birthday memorable in a positive way this year and here's to more birthdays celebrated with friends, family and loved ones in the future!

Desperately seeking happiness

2018-07-24T23:07:00.000+08:00

One of the films I enjoy watching whenever I need a dose of inspiration is Hector and the Search for Happiness. In it, Hector (Simon Pegg) goes to Shanghai, Nepal, Africa and Los Angeles to research happiness. What's amazing about the film is as enviable as the places that Hector visited were, it doesn't just make you want to travel. It gets you excited about the people you're going to meet and the lessons you're going to learn wherever life's road may take you.

One of the many quotable quotes from the movie is this:

How many of us, I wonder, can recall that childhood moment when we experienced happiness as a state of being, that single moment of untarnished joy, that moment when everything in our world, inside and out, was alright? Everything was alright.

Now, we've become a colony of adults and everything is all wrong, all the time. It's as if we were on a quest to get it back and yet the more we focus on our personal happiness, the more it eludes us. In fact, it's only when we are otherwise engaged—you know, focused, absorbed, inspired, communicating, discovering, learning, dancing, for heaven's sake—that we experience happiness as a byproduct, a side effect. Oh no, we should concern ourselves not so much with the pursuit of happiness but with the happiness of pursuit.

I know reviews of this film aren't all that great, but if you're in as chaotic a place in your life as I am right now, go watch it and maybe you'll find some inspiration too.

My late 2016 life review

2017-01-26T07:38:00.000+08:00

2016 was a terrible, terrible year for mankind. America placed the wrong person in the most powerful seat in the world, and here in the Philippines we failed to elect the most qualified leader our country could have. Current president Duterte might not be performing—or behaving—as most Filipinos would have him perform, but one could argue that Miriam Defensor-Santiago could do so much better at the job. I reckon she might even still be with us today as the presidency would have been her driving force to stay alive.

Santiago wasn't the only famous personality who came to the end of their road in 2016, however. There were Prince, George Michael, David Bowie, Muhammad Ali, Alan Rickman and Carrie Fisher, among others. Less famous but in no way less significant were the people who lost their lives in the various horrific mass shootings worldwide. And much closer to home, there was Mines. (I've written about the passing away of a former colleague, Cyrill Tan, also last year, here.)

Mines was my best friend in college and I considered her my sister. I knew her family and they lovingly let me into their home, for school projects and for when we simply wanted to hang out after church on Sundays. Mines and I shared a lot of interests and had the same view about many things, one of which was an aversion to constant communication. We love that people keep findings ways to bring everyone closer together through technology (not only can you post a video on Facebook of what you're doing right now, you also have the option to Facebook Live it so your friends can watch you in real time!) but when it came to Mines and me texting, our messages to each other could go unanswered for hours, days even, and it wouldn't be a big deal to us.

I guess that kind of attitude towards technology and constant communication comes with age too. More and more I'm preferring face-to-face conversations over texting and sending cards or gifts over writing greetings or posting photo collages on someone's Facebook timeline for their birthday. More and more, too, I'm realizing that special experiences don't always have to be documented, whether to be later posted online or not, which is why I haven't been recording videos as much for my year-end videos anymore (hence the absence of one for 2016). It's the people with whom I'm having these experiences that matter.

I never thought there would come a day when I'd be comfortable living with someone, but I now am. With my partner and a kitten we had rescued, no less, in a more well-ventilated and spacious apartment which I hope would help make me less sickly this year (I've had several bouts of illness last year, two of them resulting in hospital confinement, one in a minor surgery). I've reconciled with a close work friend I had a major spat with, and my college friends and I have been keeping contact more since Mines' passing. I'm also happy to report that the number of times I visited my family last year is a staggering 4, compared to just 1 or even nil in previous years. Because if there's anything that Mines' death has taught me, it's that life is too short and I wouldn't be living it at all if I weren't cultivating the few true relationships I have.

Back when we were still unemployed, Mines and I would sit under the night sky at Glorietta Park in Makati and talk about this "ugly feeling" weighing on us, this sense that something wasn't right, that we could be doing so much more with ourselves. These days I would still sometimes get that ugly feeling, but it no longer has anything to do with unemployment. My best friend has left me, and there will now and forevermore be that void in my heart that only someone as pure and beautiful a human being as Mines could fill. But at least I had enough of those moments with her when I got to cultivate our relationship. In real life, face to face and disconnected from social media. Now go disconnect and cultivate your relationship with your loved ones too.

Would have been 30 today. Love you always and forever.
A photo posted by J. Faller (@leeflailmarch) on Aug 24, 2016 at 9:43am PDT

Taboo with friends

2016-03-07T13:42:00.000+08:00

The game Taboo has been around since 1989, but it wasn't until 2008 that I got introduced to it. I was in training at Convergys with a dozen or so new-hires and, language training being a prerequisite to becoming a call center agent, we had to endure all sorts of front-of-the-class situations to get us to converse fluently in English. Least humiliating of all these was playing Taboo.

My team always won, but this came at a price. While we relished every point we gained, our trainer Kodi relished every opportunity to document our hilarious statements on her blog. I couldn't recall the address, but I remember being included in one entry:

"paw: the hand of a dog"

Of course, what I meant was "the equivalent of a human hand in a dog," which is a paw (which my team got correctly anyway), but in the interest of time I said it much more succinctly.

I've tried using different Google search terms to locate said blog entry, but the blog itself must have already been taken down by Kodi. To preserve the tradition, though, here are some of my current work friends' most hilarious Taboo moments:

Belle: "Eto, sinasakyan niyo 'to pero pangmaramihan!" ("This is a type of public transport that can carry a lot of people!")
Us: "Bus?"
Belle shakes her head.
Us: "Van?"
Belle (nodding): "Pero Tagalog!" ("But in Tagalog!")
Us: "Ban!"

Belle: "Anong ginagawa niyo kapag tapos na kumanta?" ("What do you do after singing?")
Us: "Bow?"
Belle (nodding): "Pero English!" ("But in English!")
Us: "Vow!"

Kennan: "Kabaligtaran ng 'hindi!'" ("The antonym of 'hindi!'")
Us: "Oo?"
Kennan: "ENGLISH!"
Us: "Yes?"
Kennan: "BISAYA!"
One of us: "Yeast?"

Belle: "C5! C1... C2..." (motions for us to continue)
Us: "C3? C4? C5? C6?"
Belle (pointing to us excitedly): "SINGULAR!"
One of us: "C-sic?"
(Belle squirms with even more excitement and I take a few moments before I realize what the answer is: "seasick.")

My friends might just be too witty for their own good.

PETA's 3 Stars and a Sun, a rap musical

2016-02-26T19:17:00.001+08:00

Dystopian. I hate the word, not just because of the imagery it calls to mind, but also because it has been the theme of so many futuristic novels and films lately. And they all have similar plots: a global epidemic, climate change or war (or all of the above) forces the remaining members of society into hiding, inside an idyllic walled city where they are ruled by Elders, a Ministry or a Congress. Memory wiping and/or reconditioning is the ruling body's method of asserting their control over the people, but there's that one person who remembers something from their past through dreams and flashbacks, and that one person, usually aided by friends, ends up being the hero who dethrones those in power and leads everyone to the discovery that—gasp—there's actually still a livable world out there.

We've seen it in Aeon Flux, The Hunger Games (sans the memory wiping and livable outside world), The Giver, The Maze Runner and the Divergent film series. Can we really not imagine a futuristic world another way? Oh, right. The alternative is to be dominated by aliens.

PETA follows up its successful several runs of Rak of Aegis with a rap musical called 3 Stars and a Sun, this time paying tribute to the music of late rap legend Francis Magalona. The play's theme is dystopian, with elements reminiscent of Aeon Flux and The Giver, with some West Side Story-esque teenage gang rivalry thrown in. Bregna/The Communities is Stormdome, the Jets and the Sharks are Lumino and Diliman/Tropang Gising, and Aeon Flux/Jonas is Sol. But unlike these novels/films, 3 Stars and a Sun is set in the Philippines exactly 70 years into the future. Francis M's music ties the play's nationalistic angle to its plot, giving the audience a somewhat unexpected slap in the face—intense, but not too forceful, if that's even possible—not unlike the one everyone got when they saw Heneral Luna in cinemas. It was a slap that rebuked, "Shame on you for forgetting your country's history and debasing what your national heroes have shed their blood for!"

I had braced myself for something over-the-top, influenced by a friend's comment that PETA's plays tend to be so, but whatever initial impressions I may have had of the production (I thought within the first few minutes, "Ah, so it's to be a battle between the conio kids and the kanto kids") were quickly erased as the musical went on. I was relieved that "Kaleidoscope World," arguably one of Francis M's most popular hits, wasn't butchered or overused. It was injected into the musical in small doses, just enough to tug on the audience's heartstrings, not sung in its entirety to the point of becoming a sing-along number. Same with heartfully rendered "Cold Summer Nights"—I had to confirm with my friend Cams if I was hearing the song right because it was...wait, I won't spoil that for you.

To be completely honest, I was never a Francis M fan. I knew only of his songs "Mga Kababayan" and the other two I had just mentioned. But I know he was fiercely nationalistic. While Western hip-hop artists rapped about weed, women, money and bling, Francis M rapped about defending our motherland, the land of the three stars and a sun. He called for the youth to make a stand, hand in hand, declaring, "kabataan para sa kinabukasan." He influenced younger rap and hip-hop artists like Gloc 9 and Abra to write about thought-provoking matters that would hopefully call the masses to action. And that was PETA's aim in creating this rap musical: a call to action that we would remember who we are as Filipinos, and that we would live in a way that would make our national heroes, Francis M included, proud that their deaths contributed greatly, in a positive way, to this country's present generation.

The dazzling set of 3 Stars and a Sun.

3 Stars and a Sun is written by Mixcaela Villalon and Rody Vera, and directed by Nor Domingo. Musical arrangement and direction is by Myke Solomon (who also did the same for Rak of Aegis). Production design is by Gino Gonzales, light design by Shoko Matsumoto and Ian Torqueza, sound design by Teresa Barrozo, and choreography by Delphine Buencamino.

Gio Gahol (Chino) and Nicco Manalo (Sol).

The cast is led by Nicco Manalo alternating with Gold Villar for the role of Sol, and Paolo Valenciano alternating with Gio Gahol for the role of Chino. The rest include Che Ramos-Cosio and Carla Guevarra-Laforteza (portraying Vidame Inky), Giannina Ocampo and Justine Peña (Dianne), Bodjie Pascua and Raffy Tejada (Mang Okik), John Moran and Nar Cabico (Poy), Anna Luna and Jet Barrun (Nazty), Lee Villoria and EJ Pepito (Kat), Anj Heruela and Gab Pangilinan (Chelsea), and Jef Flores and Norbs Portales (Winston), with the ensemble composed of Jason Barcial, Raflesia Bravo, Yesh Burce, Lance Busa, Roi Calilong, Gimbey Dela Cruz, Nica Santiago and Ian Segarra.

Giannina Ocampo (Dianne), Carla Guevarra-Laforteza (Vidame Inky) and Paolo Valenciano (Chino).

While everyone else in Manila was at Madonna's concert last Wednesday, my friends and I watched the musical's 8-o'clock show, whose leads included Nicco Manalo, Paolo Valenciano, Giannina Ocampo, Che Cosio and Raffy Tejada. Che Cosio talk-sang her rap parts in a cute way. Which isn't to say it wasn't good, but I'm curious to know how Carla Laforteza would have executed her rapping. Paolo Valenciano, sounding like his dad at times when singing (that's a compliment), was effective in his role, as were Giannina Ocampo and Nicco Manalo, but it would have also been interesting to see how Gio Gahol, previously just a choreographer and ensemble member in Rak of Aegis, would have portrayed Chino, rapping, singing and all. I'll have to see another show to find out.

The rap musical runs from February 4 to March 6, 2016 at the PETA Theater in New Manila, Quezon City. For tickets and inquires you may visit petatheater.com or ticketworld.com.ph.

Wishes and deaths (in memory of Cyrill Tan)

2016-02-09T23:50:00.000+08:00

I'm a Christian but somehow, two nights ago, I found myself celebrating the Lunar New Year at a friend's house. Having never done so before, I marveled at all the traditions the Chinese and some Filipinos observe to usher good luck into the new year: Wear red. Put eight 1-peso coins in your right pocket. Make sure the money in your wallet amounts to an even number. Have fish and pancit with long noodles as some of the dishes on the table, along with a cup of uncooked rice topped with coins and at least an egg (a money charm). I didn't care much about whether the dishes we had served were lucky. We didn't have fish or pancit but we had lots of takeaway dimsum from this fantastic Chinese place at Sta. Lucia Mall. I ate much of it with gusto.

When my friend Belle brought out wishing paper that we were supposed to write our wishes on and then burn later, I had to ask some questions. Does the "even numbers only" rule apply, meaning I can't write just one wish? Can it be in bullets or do I have to write it in essay form? I felt like a student again, conscientious and competitive, and as such I was first of the six of us to finish.

* * *

I rarely go home, much less see my grandparents who live about a ten-minute walk away from our house in Cavite, so I was surprised to see the condition they were in when I visited them with my mom and niece two days after last Christmas. My Nanay (82) struggles with stairs now, so she and my Tatay (83) have resorted to sleeping downstairs. For support when they walk, they both rely on canes, rails my dad mounted on their walls, and a caregiver they've hired. When we went to the mall the next day to have an early birthday celebration for my Nanay, she fell to the floor trying to take a seat at the restaurant despite having me beside her as a guide. It was a heartbreaking sight; I had to fight back tears as I helped her up.

It wasn't just my grandma's deteriorating motor skills that got me tearing up during my visit. Entire conversations now have to be repeated at times for both my grandparents' sake, my Nanay for her forgetfulness and my Tatay for his poor hearing. My Lola Charing, despite retaining her chattiness, is no longer as energetic as she used to be (and she used to be really energetic). Thank goodness, my mom, dad, brother, sister-in-law and niece seem to be okay, though I cringe at the thought of my ten-year old niece happily chatting with a boy on Facebook messenger (in secret, or so she thought; she has a smartphone with really small text, I have bionic eyes).

News of several deaths haven't been in short supply lately. There were those of music legend David Bowie, actor Alan Rickman, and much closer to home, my colleague, the novelist Cyrill Tan. Cy passed away due to cardiac arrest after a week of being in intensive care for pneumonia and heart enlargement. I was far more shocked than I had been at the deaths of David Sicam, Gerard Baja, comedian Tado and the others my friend Cams was with two years ago in that bus crash in Bontoc. Cy was only 26, after all, and we had interacted a lot at work. I interviewed him over the phone when he was applying for a phone banking job in our unit four years ago. A couple of times I assisted him when he had questions while speaking with a client. Several months before he transferred to branch services, he asked me to make a website for him so fans of his book "Charlie Sparks: A Sorcerer's Tale" could have somewhere online to get updates from aside from his Facebook page. He wrote at the back of the Charlie Sparks book I bought from him:

"To one of the most talented persons I know, thank you for sharing some love on this endeavor. Continue to be very inspiring with your own craft."

I've never considered myself talented, just somebody sufficiently capable of accomplishing most tasks laid before him (in other words, a jack-of-all-trades), but I'm inclined to accept a compliment like above from someone who, at the age of 24, self-published a book he had started working on when he was barely a teenager. You, Cy, are one of the most talented persons I know, and through your book and the people you shared your brief life with, your memory will live on.

May you rest in peace, @cyrilltan.
A video posted by J. Faller (@leeflailmarch) on Feb 4, 2016 at 6:31pm PST

Last Sunday wasn't just the eve of the Lunar New Year. It also marked the second anniversary of that tragic Florida bus accident in Bontoc, Mountain Province. After a couple of surgeries and several sessions with a physical therapist, Cams is doing so much better, though it would still take her a while before she could walk again without needing a cane. Cams' friend Michal has been taking trips in and out of the country, probably setting off metal detectors as he goes. Not everyone has been as fortunate, however. Ayen had to quit her job months ago because although her condition has improved greatly, she remains unable to stand on her own. She still misses her late husband David, and so do her sons Agung and Amian.

Before Cams and I left her apartment to get the takeaway dimsum we were bringing to our friend's house, she received news of one of her favorite UST professor's passing. She had gasped loudly and somehow, half certain, I joked, "May namatay na naman?" ("Did someone die again?") Turned out I was right. That night, I could have included in my wish list a successful hike to the Seven Summits, a new laptop, a fast metabolism and people around me spending less time on their smartphones. But what with death constantly reminding us that we are finite, I figured I only needed a very short, still-somewhat-selfish but practical list: good health for my loved ones (especially my parents and grandparents), career development, financial stability and a closer relationship with my family. Those should be more than enough to keep me happy this new year and after.

The ashes of my wishing paper.

My 2015

2016-01-18T10:38:00.000+08:00

#GOODBYE2015 from leeflailmarch on Vimeo.

Uber x Merry Moo = #UberIceCream

2015-07-24T17:10:00.000+08:00

I've had nothing but good experiences with Uber so far, and as it turns out, it's not just your ride for the day the app can bring to wherever you are, but ice cream too!

From 12 to 6 in the afternoon today (yes, the promo's still ongoing), you can log on to Uber, select "Ice Cream" from the usual ride options (that sliding bar at the bottom), and have Merry Moo's best-selling Sea Salt Caramel ice cream delivered to your doorstep.

The steps are simple but getting a hit requires patience. It took me 50 minutes of seeing that "NO ICE CREAM AVAILABLE" balloon (which I took as the universe's way of saying "STOP STUFFING YOUR FACE WITH FOOD ALREADY!") before I finally connected with PJay, an #UberIceCream guy. PJay met me outside our office building, gave me my Merry Moo ice cream, pulled out a white Uber cap and two buttons from his backpack to hand to me (freebies), and snapped a photo of me ("for personal use," he said after I asked if I was going to see my photo anywhere online, which must mean he's keeping a record of everyone he's delivered to...I hope).

Uber limited-edition freebies.

As of the moment, you can get Merry Moo only at SM Aura Premier, SM City North EDSA, SM Megamall, Salcedo Saturday Market, Legazpi Sunday Market and Mercato Centrale. Their artisan ice cream attracts long lines, and for good reason because each spoonful of ice cream is rich, delicious and not overly sweet. So P199 for a pint via Uber is a steal, considering the original price is P320, and you get to skip the lines. Unfortunately, Sea Salt Caramel is the only flavor available for the #UberIceCream promo and you can order just one pint per app, so if you're like me, you'll convince your Uber-using friends to stay glued to their Uber screens to catch that elusive "Set Pick-up Location" balloon for the ice cream...if they aren't already on the lookout for it themselves.

Don't let this stop you.

The promo is only open to Makati, The Fort, Ortigas, Greenhills and Eastwood. Less than an hour to go for the promo! Don't give up on it now!

"You want me."

I Love You. Thank You.

2015-07-07T10:48:00.000+08:00

I dislike most local films but delight in the fact that once in a while, after the release of the nth Shake, Rattle and Roll, Wattpad novel adaptation and kabit-themed flick, the masses get treated to a quality film or two that we as Filipinos can be proud of. Most of the time they're independent productions developed and promoted by film festivals like the Cinemalaya Philippine Independent Film Festival. This year, such indie films are featured in the Filipino New Cinema category of the first-ever World Premieres Film Festival, and one of them is the Charliebebs Gohetia-written and -directed movie titled I Love You. Thank You.

The movie begins beautifully, with Joross Gamboa roaming the streets of Bangkok, taking pictures of the sights as he goes. In the background, Edgar Allan Guzman's slower, softer rendition of Silent Sanctuary's "Sa'Yo" immediately tugs at the viewer's heartstrings and sets the tone of the movie. This is going to be emotional. The title, after all, is I Love You. Thank You, and few things are more heart-wrenching than a love that isn't returned.

But is it really a matter of unrequited love, or is there, to a small degree, an exchange of it, only not in equal proportions? Or maybe it's a matter of timing. You get to ponder on these things a lot as the story progresses. Joross Gamboa's character Paul has feelings for Red (Prince Stefan) but Red is in a long-term relationship with Paul's best friend Ivan (CJ Reyes). Red is pretty serious about Ivan, preparing surprises for his birthday and their upcoming fourth anniversary, but Ivan isn't as invested in the relationship as Red is...or at least not anymore. While still very much in love with Red, Paul sojourns to Siem Reap where he meets Tang (Thai actor Ae Pattawan) who has already become besotted with him even before they've officially met. Eventually, back in Bangkok, Paul gets the opportunity to be with his love interest but not before he has already said yes to taking chances with Tang.

Tang (Ae Pattawan) and Paul (Joross Gamboa) biking around Siem Reap.

Joross Gamboa has done gay roles before but it just might be in I Love You. Thank You. where he shines best. He doesn't need to do drag or take off his shirt to reveal a gym-going closeted gay guy's physique, because he isn't playing any gay stereotype. He's playing a gay man in love. The inflections, gay lingo and gesticulations are merely supporting details to his character. He switches with ease from being effeminate to slightly more masculine depending on the situation, sans the redundant waxing-poetic that the other leads seem to need to make sure we sympathize with them. I couldn't fully sympathize with Red being heartbroken over Ivan even after he (spoiler alert!) tries to take his own life by slashing his wrist. And despite Tang's habit of jotting down his sentiments on a journal, I still couldn't wrap my head around how he is supposedly a writer, much less a porn writer by profession. But when Paul stares longingly at Red without saying anything, I feel the weight of Paul's pain and believe he is truly, madly, deeply in love with him. Joross is that convincing.

143TY, as the film's title is stylized on social media sites, is a gay film that doesn't bank on steamy scenes to lure in members of the gay community. It's a story about love and heartbreak that anyone, gay and straight alike, can relate to, with the added bonus of four attractive male actors playing the lead characters in beautiful locations such as the streets of Bangkok and Ho Chi Minh and the temples of Siem Reap. You wouldn't believe it's a low-budget movie because it's an achievement in guerrilla filmmaking, and it's in independent films such as this where we may find that perhaps there's hope for Philippine cinema yet.

Though the other entries under the World Premieres Film Festival's Filipino New Cinema category will still be screened in SM Cinemas until July 27, I Love You. Thank You. will have one last screening on July 17 (Friday), 8 PM at UP Cine Adarna. Catch it then because you might not get another chance.

***

UPDATE (from the movie's Facebook page): 143TY will have a UPLB screening this September. More details to follow.

Go mad for sausages at Mad Mustard

2015-06-24T19:55:00.002+08:00

If we were, say, in New York City, there would be a hotdog stand or a food truck serving grilled sausages at almost every street corner. But this is Manila. I live in Pasig, specifically, and aside from 7-Eleven and perhaps the ubiquitous Angel's Burger (which, despite their kiosks' questionable sanitary conditions, serves a mean Hungarian sausage sandwich for just a little over P70), there are very few places one can easily get good sausages at for a reasonable price. Lucky for Marikeños and those living/working nearby, there's Mad Mustard, a recently-opened hotdogs and fries joint located near what is quickly becoming the next foodie haven, Lilac Street.

What I ordered when I went to Mad Mustard with my friends: all-meat sausage (add-on: bacon), fries and moringa (malunggay) juice

Mad Mustard serves many different kinds of tasty sausages at very affordable prices, from their most basic offering, the All-Meat Sausage (P98) to their most expensive, such as Bratwurst, Kolbaz (or Kolbasz), Kielbasa and Italian Fennel (all P160). They also have other unique sausages like Beer Sausage and Chorizo de Cataluna (both P150). You get your order in a hotdog bun, with a smattering of ketchup, mayo and, naturally, mustard on top, plus a spoonful of pickle relish (they pile 'em all on by default, so tell your waiter if you don't want any). You can customize your sandwich with add-ons such as Swiss cheese, jalapeño, caramelized onions, sauerkraut and bacon (P20 to P30 per add-on). No need to worry about overdoing it because they give you plastic gloves to eat with, in case you make a mess. You can even make your order a combo for an additional P50 and they throw in some crispy fries and a cold drink—your choice of either iced tea or moringa citrus, which is surprisingly good considering it is malunggay (but don't take my word for it; you may ask your waiter for a taste of it in a tiny tea cup first).

The place is beautifully painted bright yellow and orange, with sausage cartoons which might make you take pity on your food (not me, I was pretty hungry). If you're with friends and are staying for a while, you can order beer. Mad Mustard carries imported brands like Corona and Stella Artois, and they go really well with sausages. Just don't stay too long or be too loud when you get drunk, because the place seats only about 20 persons, inside and out, and the place can get a bit warm especially when packed.

Mad Mustard Hotdogs & Fries Joint is a stone's throw away from the infamous Lilac Street, at 60 Sapphire Street, SSS Village, Concepcion II, Marikina. Despite having been featured on local TV at least once, the place has no long lines outside and almost no reviews on the Internet (though there is a somewhat disturbing-slash-hilarious search result that links to the Urban Dictionary "mad mustard" entry). Go visit while demand hasn't yet made their prices shoot up.

The Jurassic World Megamall IMAX experience

2015-06-17T19:40:00.000+08:00

Anyone who was early for the 8:10 PM screening of Jurassic World at SM Megamall's IMAX Cinema last Saturday would remember this Ant-Man trailer moment very clearly:

The trailer had stopped at this exact frame, and at first I thought it was either a glitch or the film projectionist's way of allowing everyone to appreciate the ruggedness of Paul Rudd's face. But then I realized the pause was so the cinema's management team could sort out the seating issue which was then ongoing for those who had booked their tickets online.

Apparently, only three rows in the middle of the theater were dedicated for online reservations, so regardless of your chosen seat number you can only sit in rows G to I. My date's company and I were part of that group, but we got to the cinema early so we still had acceptable center seats. Others weren't as lucky nor were they as forgiving of the seating blunder.

The first commotion we heard, even before the trailers were paused, came from behind us. A newly-arrived woman, a foreigner by the sound of her accent, was arguing with someone already seated. "So what was the point of my booking last June 19 if I couldn't get my reserved seat?" she said with indignation—mistaken with the date, I assume, unless she had come from the future. "We were told these seats are on a 'first come, first served' basis," said the walk-in moviegoer she was addressing. "And we got here first." The foreign woman repeated her argument thrice more, but met with the same response she finally gave up and headed toward a side seat. Several minutes after the trailers were paused, some guys tried to make sarcastic applause catch on inside the theater, successful only the first time out of two attempts. A long silence later, a woman at the back row asked aloud what was going on and if the issue could be resolved quickly because "kawawa naman 'yung mga nakatayo" ("I feel bad for those standing up").

I didn't care much for it then—the break in the trailers allowed me some time to check on my SimCity BuildIt metropolis on my phone—but I was curious so I investigated by trying to book Jurassic World tickets via SM Cinema's website today.

The blue cells are the ones I selected.

The root of the problem seems to be this page that allows one to select any seat in the IMAX Theater when booking a ticket. If row allotment for online reservations was indeed just from G to I, then I shouldn't be allowed to select, say, row M seats, like I did (highlighted blue in the screenshot above). There wasn't even a pop-up message about it when I proceeded to the next page, and nowhere else on the SM Cinema website, not even the FAQs section, does it say only certain rows are allotted for online reservations. I didn't try to go further because that would entail actually paying for the tickets, but if SM Cinema is still allowing their site visitors to reserve any seat in the IMAX Theater only to be told come movie time that their reservations are moot, then I can only imagine how stressful it has been for their managers-on-duty (which might explain why there apparently has been rapid career movement for their theater staff, as my date's friends have noticed since they last came to the Megamall IMAX).

About ten minutes since the Ant-Man trailer was paused back at the cinema, Paul Rudd returned in motion and we all had to wear our 3D glasses again, so the seating issue must have eventually been sorted out, at least for that screening time. As for the film, Jurassic World is visually stunning in 3D and thrilling enough to make us forget about everything that recently happened. I just felt like it was lacking in new dinosaur species to introduce to its audience. Over a decade since Jurassic Park III and all they could add to the roster are the winged Dimorphodon, aquatic Mosasaurus and genetically-modified Indominus rex. As magnificent as those creatures were, however, they paled in comparison to Claire Dearing, the dinosaur theme park's operations manager played by Bryce Dallas Howard. Even in heels she had been wearing for more than a day she can outrun a full-grown Tyrannosaurus rex. That's certainly more impressive than a hybrid dinosaur who can camouflage and evade thermal imaging.

S&R in Eastwood must mean "Slow & Regrettable"

2015-06-10T21:30:00.000+08:00

My first taste of S&R's pizza, courtesy of my friend Jam, was of the garlic and shrimp variant, still delectable despite having spent a couple of hours in her car. That was about a year ago when the closest someone in Eastwood City could get to having a bite of the New York-style pizza was a drive to S&R's Shaw warehouse or their stand-alone joint in Puregold Cubao. But not anymore, thanks to the branch they opened in February at the ground level of Le Grand Tower 2.

I've only visited the newly-opened restaurant twice. The first time was one weeknight in March when Claire treated Cams and me (nakantsyawan) to an entire 18-inch pizza of mixed flavors. Not surprisingly, the lines in front of their counters were long. Probably terrified that the indecisive girls in front of us might become double homicide victims in my hands, Claire suggested that Cams and I go ahead to Cams' place while she queued. We added some churros to our order, because I figured if we were going to wait long for our pizza, then we might as well have dessert too. We left Claire still in line at around 7:45 PM. We got to eat our pizzas and churros, thankfully still hot, at 10.

"They just opened!" you might say. "Give them a break!" We knew we couldn't hope to get a table that night, but we had hoped to at least be able to order in less than 30 minutes. The lines being long was excusable. The excruciatingly slow service was not. Sure, we have what we call a learning curve, but I was patient with them until I noticed that the crew member going around taking orders was not relaying our choices to the kitchen staff. She may have saved a few seconds of our time in front of the register, but customers were waiting longer to claim their pizzas and she could have greatly helped with that by getting our orders across in advance.

I had left this blog entry sitting silently in my drafts since. Until last Saturday, that is, when after many nights of passing by the restaurant post-workout I finally gave in to my pizza craving. It was noon and my date and I were getting two boxes of pizza for our Jurassic Park movie marathon at home (in preparation for Jurassic World). It should have been easy enough. The lines were short and two crew members were assisting the one dude in front of us at order counter 1. Three customers later at counter 2, however, and we were still waiting, because Marielle and the other girl behind counter 1 essentially made us wait with the dude before us to get his pizzas when they could have asked him to do that at the claim counter.

Then came our turn and it was one of those rare instances I thought I couldn't have possibly become peeved when the cashier interrupts me with a question mid-order. Ours was short and simple. "Two boxes. One garlic and shrimp. One pepperoni," I told Marielle. But she and her assistant only got one thing right from what I said. "Two." They thought I was ordering two pizza slices, not boxes, and the flavor she apparently heard was "combo." Peeved I still became.

We got our pizzas ten minutes after their promise of only a twenty-minute wait, without a raffia ribbon tied around the boxes to carry them easily. Lugging them awkwardly, we hailed a cab, hurried home and wolfed a few slices even before we could play Jurassic Park on my laptop. I might have just been famished, because their pizza seemed to taste good only for the first dozen square-cut slices. Or maybe it was umay—there were only two of us, after all, sharing two 18-inch pizzas for all our meals within a span of twenty-four hours. I remember enjoying our pizza and churros from that night in March, though, so maybe it was psychological, the quality of service rendered by the restaurant influencing my perception of the taste.

Bavarian churros. Can't decide if they're better than the cinnamon ones, because both flavors are good.

I've heard of better service at other S&R restos like in Puregold Cubao, but if you can, just go to their actual warehouses to enjoy their pizza (though of course you'd have to be a card-carrying member or bring along someone who is). You can even buy their roast chicken, which I've heard is delicious too. I'm looking forward to trying that soon along with their clam chowder and burger. But not at their Eastwood joint anymore.

Boyhood: life as it happens, NOT in an in-between state

2015-05-10T23:55:00.000+08:00

In what seems to me to be the best film nominated in this year's Academy Awards (but which sadly won only one Oscar—that for Best Supporting Actress), life is depicted beautifully in twelve years' worth of video footage, and summed up perfectly, in my opinion, in two scenes. The first scene comes two hours into Boyhood, with Mason talking to his girlfriend Sheena in the car, in Richard Linklater's trademark stream-of-consciousness style of conversation.

Sheena: "That sounds to me like just another extreme Mason view of everything."

Mason: "Not at all! I finally figured it out. It's like when they realized it was gonna be too expensive to actually build cyborgs and robots. I mean, the costs of that were impossible. They decided to just let humans turn themselves into robots. That's what's going on right now."

S: "Oh, right now?"

M: "Yeah! I mean, why not? There are billions of us just laying around, not really doing anything. We don't cost anything. I mean, we're even pretty good at self-maintenance and reproducing constantly. And as it turns out, we're already biologically programmed for our little cyborg upgrades."

S: "How?"

M: "Seriously! I read this thing the other day about how when you hear that ding on your inbox, you get like a dopamine rush in your brain. It's like we're being chemically rewarded for allowing ourselves to be brainwashed. How evil is that? We're fucked."

S: "So you deleting your Facebook page is gonna change all that? Remember when Trevor deleted his Facebook page last year and everyone just hated him? You made more fun of him than anyone."

M: "I still make fun of Trevor though."

S: "It was like he was so pathetically desperate for attention. Or to be different, or something."

M: "That's just 'cause they did that lame story about it in the school paper."

S: "And then he had to make a big announcement about it when he came back a month later."

M: "That's the thing, though. I'm not doing it for attention. I just wanna try and not live my life through a screen. I want some kind of actual interaction. A real person, not just the profile they put up."

S (looking at her phone): "I'm sorry. Were you saying something?"

M: "Yeah, okay, I know you're joking. But, I mean, it's kind of true. You have been, you know, checking your phone this whole time... So, what are you really doing? You don't care what your friends are up to on a Saturday afternoon, but you're also obviously not fully experiencing my profound bitching. So, yeah, it's like everyone's just stuck in like an in-between state. Not really experiencing anything."

S: "It's not an experience, it's just information. Look, for example, I just got the address of the club where we're meeting them later, so we won't be wandering the streets of Austin lost for an hour tonight. Thank you very much, Facebook... And then I just texted my mom back."

M: "That's groundbreaking. She hasn't seen you in, like, 55 minutes?"

S: "My God, most importantly, Meg's family just got a miniature pet pig."

M (looking at Sheena's phone): "Okay, you're right. That is a really cute, tiny pig. Our lives can go on."

S: "I want one."

And then right at the very end of the film, Mason and a new college acquaintance Nicole tie that thought up with the idea that we can't really seize the moment because the moment, being constant, is the one that seizes us, as if to ask, "Will we just be on our phones checking our Facebook news feeds the next time the moment tries to seize us?"

Will we?

Manila Chinatown chow: six food stops in one day

2015-03-24T11:00:00.000+08:00

It started last Tuesday, just a little past midnight, when I couldn't seem to doze off. I opened my laptop and looked for a movie to put me to sleep, something somber and familiar, preferably with subtitles. I settled on Wong Kar-wai's In the Mood for Love, but instead of putting me to sleep, the film, during the scene where Mrs. Chan goes out for take-out noodles, only made me hungry. I snacked on a soft-boiled egg and wheat crackers to satisfy my hunger, but I was left with a really intense craving for Chinese noodles.

The magnificent Maggie Cheung as Mrs. Chan in In the Mood for Love.

There are several places I could easily go to for authentic Chinese food (Causeway and Yang Chow in Libis, for instance), but I've always wanted to return to Binondo since being taken there two years ago by my dear friend Seddy. So that's what I did in the weekend. With a special date. Albeit four days late to satisfy my noodle craving.

It was Saturday, and the heat, thank goodness, was bearable enough for commuting. One UV Express shuttle and two train rides took us from Pasig to Binondo just before lunchtime, and the very first recommended restaurant we came upon, based on a list I had compiled from the Internet, was The Original SaLido Restaurant located along Ongpin St. The place claimed to be "Home of the Famous Asado," so we ordered a small plate of the pork dish for P245.

The Original SaLido Restaurant's so-called asado.

The asado came surprisingly fast, though probably just because the pork, flavorless and lacking in tenderness, hadn't been mixed with the asado sauce yet. I felt like we had ordered lemon chicken only to be served a plate of breaded chicken fillet and a separate lemon sauce. We had to do our own dipping and mixing to get the flavor that we wanted. (Or maybe we were simply wrong in assuming we'd get the traditional Filipino-Chinese red, sweet char siu pork.)

Shanghai Fried Siopao, almost nondescript, so keep an eye out for it along Ongpin St. if you'd like some of their fried siopao.

We immediately left SaLido and walked along Ongpin till we reached Shanghai Fried Siopao. We each got a fried siopao (P18 per piece), which I've tried before but whose taste still surprised me, being used to the Bicol-style toasted siopao sold a few blocks away from my place in Pasig. Their similarity is that they both don't need any sauce to enhance their taste. But only the bottom of the fried siopao is toasted, and—a word of caution for those with food sensitivity—the buns are prepared and packed in plastic bags using bare hands.

Shanghai Fried Siopao doesn't just sell fried siopao but other Chinese delicacies too.

By the time we were finished with our siopao, we already had a hankering for a complete meal. So we headed to Wai Ying Fastfood, which was this hole-in-the-wall joint Seddy took me to before and whose white chicken with ginger-garlic relish still haunts my daydreams.

There are two Wai Yings in Binondo: the restaurant which has two floors, and the take-out joint.

Wai Ying had a lot that we could have ordered, but we were not yet done restaurant-hopping so we only got half an order of the white chicken (P190), no rice, and hakao (P80). I've had better hakao but I've never liked ginger in any dish other than in Wai Ying's luya relish, which I slathered on each cut of chicken I inhaled. To wash it down, I had cold milk tea while my date had cold lemon tea (both P55 a glass).

Wai Ying's white chicken and its luya relish, and hakao.

The chicken and hakao had already made us a bit full so we skipped having mami at Masuki Mami Restaurant, which was also just along Benavidez St. Instead, we went to Cafe Mezzanine, famous for their kiampong and Soup No. 5 and for donating all the revenue from their firehouse-themed restaurant to the Binondo Paco Fire Search and Rescue Brigade. We weren't adventurous enough to order Soup No. 5 so we got their xiao long bao, affordable at P180 for ten dumplings, and their wintermelon juice, priced at P65 a glass. We couldn't finish the xiao long bao, though that might have been because the dumplings' flour skin tasted a little too street siomai-like. The wintermelon juice, on the other hand, was delightfully refreshing and I enjoyed munching on the sweet wintermelon bits.

Cafe Mezzanine's xiao long bao.

It was drizzling when we left Cafe Mezzanine to line up at Eng Bee Tin for hopia. I had gotten addicted to Eng Bee Tin's hopia piña (pineapple) ever since my dad started occasionally bringing it home as pasalubong when I was a kid, so I bought six packs of those (P38 each) and four packs of their more popular custard hopia (P50 each). The place was filled with women hoarding various types of Eng Bee Tin pastries and making sure their purchases weren't going to expire earlier than May, so even though we could have eaten our hopia there at one of their tables, we opted to just leave for Lord Stow's for a proper dessert.

The crowd at Eng Bee Tin, all hungry for hopia.

Lord Stow's Bakery was also packed with women hoarding pastries that Saturday. My date and I ordered a small box of four egg tarts (P165, but bought individually an egg tart is P42) and ate them at the far end of the counter while listening to an old Chinese guy intermittently talk business on the phone. Considering how tiny the bakeshop was, it was loud. Eventually the place emptied out though, allowing us to finish our egg tarts in peace.

The cronut of Asia and the 1990s: egg tart from Lord Stow's Bakery.

Lord Stow's egg tarts may not be Chinese at all (Lord Stow's Bakery first opened in Macau, but "Lord" Andrew Stow is English and his inspiration for his egg tarts, pasteis de nata, is Portuguese), but its flaky, creamy and slightly sweet goodness was the perfect way to end our food tour in the world's oldest Chinatown.

Aside from Masuki, we also weren't able to go to several other food stops in my list, such as Quick Snack, New Po-Heng Lumpia House, Dong Bei Dumplings, LGA Estero (famous for their fried frog legs, which my date was thankful I wasn't keen to try), Ying Ying Tea House and Sincerity Cafe. Restaurants like President Tea House we deliberately didn't visit because they have branches outside Binondo anyway. My In the Mood for Love-induced craving wasn't satisfied, but we were surrounded by so much Chinese food in Binondo I forgot that noodles were what I had intended to eat there in the first place. All in all, costing just P600 for each of us (not including transportation and the pasalubong from Eng Bee Tin), it was a fun and satisfying but inexpensive Manila Chinatown food tour. I'll be sure to visit more restos next time. Maybe on another date.

Livestock and La Vie Parisienne

2015-02-12T23:54:00.000+08:00

There are days when after all the good food you've skimped on in favor of low-calorie, nutritious meals, you think you deserve to indulge. Yesterday for me was such a day.

My friends Cams and Aika met another friend and former colleague Ava last night at Livestock, a restaurant that boasts being ranked first in SPOT.ph's 2014 Top 10 Crispy Pata in Manila list. Ava often holds business meetings there but it was the first time for the rest of us, so we had her recommend some dishes.

For our appetizer, Ava suggested Livestock's Chicharon 3 Kinds (crispy bulaklak, bituka or intestines, and chicken skin), which was bite after sinful bite of pork crackling goodness.

To warm our stomachs, we had Seafood Laksa Soup, which was adequately creamy and spicy.

We also ordered their Salted Egg Prawns. I found it a bit redundant in itself because it was two kinds of salty in one dish, but it was good nonetheless.

We had two pork dishes: the crispy pata, naturally, and another restaurant bestseller, the Livestock Crackling Pork Belly. You can have the latter in either a 300-, 500- or 1,000-gram slab, but we ordered just 300 grams.

The crispy pata was so tender you can cut through it with a popsicle stick and fork, which was what our waiter did when he served it to us. It wasn't a challenge to eat at all, and with its spicy soy sauce and vinegar dip it tasted even better (though I'm still partial to Serye's boneless crispy pata). Between the crackling pork belly and the crispy pata (and the three kinds of chicharon we just had), however, we already had enough fat molecules threatening to clog our arteries and making us light-headed, so we didn't even try finishing the crispy pata but had the leftovers wrapped in a to-go bag.

Though Livestock is a great place to have drinks at, we went instead to La Vie Parisienne, a French bakery, deli and wine library at the ground floor of Hotel Rembrandt, only a couple of blocks away from Livestock.

La Vie Parisienne offers a great selection of breads, pastries and wines, all for affordable prices, and you can eat and drink them inside at one of their four tables, surrounded by all their cellared wines. I ordered an apple turnover and a coffee, while my friends ordered three small slices of cake, a croissant, coffees of their own and some takeaway breads.

Everything was delicious, especially the cakes, and the fruity sweetness of the Shanpelino sangria our waiter Gelo recommended later on was so addicting we had a hard time deciding to stop at just two bottles of it. (Ava and I brought home the empty bottles to use as home decor, along with a few other bottles the staff haven't thrown away yet.) It was a satisfying night of getting drunk in oil, caffeine, alcohol and good laughs.

Shanpelino wines are cheap (P290/bottle), though they don't look like it.

Livestock is a great place to commit the sin of eating fatty foods at, maybe even with a beer or four. It's at 34 Sgt. Esguerra Ave., South Triangle, Quezon City, and they're open from 11 AM to 2 AM. You can walk in and though there's sometimes a line to get a table, you don't have to wait very long. With La Vie Parisienne, on the other hand, you may have to call ahead to reserve one of their four tables if you plan to hang out. La Vie Parisienne is at the ground floor of the Hotel Rembrandt, along Tomas Morato Ave., Quezon City, and they're open from 7 AM to 2 AM. Visit them early to enjoy more freshly-baked breads and pastries.

Into the Woods and after "happily ever after"

2015-02-09T00:43:00.000+08:00

I usually make it a point to read or watch the original medium a movie is adapted from, not to be cool and be able to haughtily say, "I've read the book and here are the bajillion ways the film version ruined it," but so I understand what was so great about the original work that it had to be adapted in the first place. (Truthfully, yes, sometimes to feel a little bit cooler than everyone else, but I don't say it out loud lest I be regarded as a douche.)

My friend Claire gave me a copy of the televised Broadway production of Into the Woods from 1991, and from the first minute of watching it, I was hooked. The story starts innocently enough, with your usual "Once upon a time" fairy tale opening, then the characters are introduced and their plights explained. Cinderella wants to go to the ball, Jack (of Jack and the Beanstalk) has to sell their cow, Little Red Riding Hood wishes to bring bread to his sick granny, and a childless baker and his wife yearn for a baby. Their paths, along with that of two princes' and another Brothers Grimm fairy tale character Rapunzel's, get intertwined by the workings of a witch who requires that the baker and his wife gather ingredients for a potion in order to lift the spell of barrenness she had apparently placed on them a long time ago. Into the Woods' first act shows us how the characters obtain their wishes, and the second act shows us what happens after "happily ever after." Stephen Sondheim and James Lapine's masterful way of telling a dark story in a witty and enjoyable manner, combined with Chip Zien, Joanna Gleason, Bernadette Peters and the rest of the cast's singing and acting, made me stay through all two hours and thirty one minutes of the video. I even applauded afterward like I was actually in a theater.

Joanna Gleason, Chip Zien and Bernadette Peters as the 1991 Broadway production's Baker's Wife, Baker and Witch, respectively

Rob Marshall's controversial big screen adaptation of Into the Woods is enjoyable too, with an all-star cast consisting of Meryl Streep, Emily Blunt, James Corden, Anna Kendrick, Chris Pine and Johnny Depp—all seasoned actors with experience doing movie musicals (with the exception of Emily Blunt and Chris Pine, whose first time it is with Into the Woods but may very well not be the last time). Meryl Streep is stellar (are we still surprised?), Emily Blunt and Anna Kendrick are wonderful, and though I haven't seen James Corden anywhere before, he plays the role of the childless baker particularly well. Daniel Huttlestone and Lilla Crawford, actual children playing Jack and Little Red Riding Hood, are quite impressive. Chris Pine is charming and funny, and Johnny Depp is appropriately creepy in that very short scene of his where he sings, "Hello, Little Girl."

Johnny Depp, one of the film's selling points but who only has a minor role as the Wolf

Not as creepy, however, as the anatomically correct wolf of the theater version, played by Robert Westenberg in the televised 1991 production. Which brings me to the much-discussed differences between the stage and film versions (spoiler alert!).

Robert Westenberg as the Wolf (in an NSFW outfit) and Danielle Ferland as Little Red Riding Hood in the 1991 Broadway production.

Aside from the special effects and the powerhouse cast, the film version of Into the Woods had, well, a "Disney-fied" story. The scene between Little Red Riding Hood and the wolf ("Hello, Little Girl"), and Little Red's "I Know Things Now" bit with the baker were desexualized a little. Downplayed too were the affair between Cinderella's prince and the baker's wife as well as the death of Jack's mother. And Rapunzel lives! Rapunzel doesn't go insane and get trampled by the giantess but runs off with her prince against her mother's plea, making the witch's song "Witch's Lament" lose much of its intended impact. When the witch sings, "No matter what you say, children't won't listen," the movie makes you think, "You gorgeous but evil witch, you deserve to be left behind by your so-called daughter!" But in the play, you're left thinking, "It's true. No matter how hard you try to guide your kids, there's always a chance they won't listen." Which makes the witch's later song "Last Midnight" all the more powerful.

To quote this article I read that focuses on the topic of Rapunzel's survival ruining the film:

"...in the Witch's swan song, 'Last Midnight,' the Witch attacks the other cast members for their inability to make a decision and their need to pass the blame. She accuses them of the biggest crime of all: being 'nice.'

'You're so nice. You're not good. You're not bad, you're just nice. I'm not good, I'm not nice, I'm just right. I'm the Witch. You're the world. I'm the hitch. I'm what no one believes, I'm the Witch.'

And this stings, because well, she was right (to a point). Her accusatory tone about their ambivalence works because she's the only person actively parenting (for better or worse). Up until then, the Baker couldn't even hold his own child. Keeping Rapunzel alive is committing the very crime of being 'just nice,' and this play is smarter than that. What's worse, in the end the cast agrees with the Witch in 'No One Is Alone,' singing, 'Witches can be right.' But in the movie version, she's not really right about anything."

Bernadette Peters (1991 Broadway) and Meryl Streep (2014 movie) as Into the Woods' Witch

All these aside, there were two major changes I actually liked in the film version. One was that Cinderella's "On the Steps of the Palace" was sung while she and the prince were suspended in time and she was stuck on the steps of the palace. Another was that they gave the death of the baker's wife a bit more of the spotlight, because in the televised Broadway production it all seemed very abrupt. I also appreciated Sondheim changing the description of Jack's mother in the play from "Well, she was not quite beautiful" to "Well, she was at her wit's end" in the movie. Because it just makes more sense.

Comparing the stage and movie versions, you're really going to see a lot of differences, but I have to say the movie turned out to be a good Sondheim/Lapine and Disney compromise, managing to retain the magic and improve the sound, while keeping the body count to a minimum and still making the story appealing to children. If we're really going to be honest though, Into the Woods is not a tale for kids. The play is rife with sexual undertones and parenting advice and it destroys the illusion of happy endings. It says, the cycle begins with a wish, and whether you get what you wish for or not, you'll likely be wishing for something more or something else again later, hence that one final "I wish" uttered by Cinderella at the end of both the play and the movie. So be careful what you wish for in the first place.

My tip to the uninitiated: Don't dismiss Rob Marshall's Into the Woods as a failed Disney adaptation. Watch the play first. Stream it or download it from the Internet...or watch the upcoming Upstart production of the musical at the Kasalikasan Garden, BGC. I know I will.

English Only, Please

2015-01-08T06:23:00.000+08:00

I was eight and it was my mom's annual company outing. The resort we were at was playing Roselle Nava's "Bakit Nga Ba" loudly and on repeat. Half-submerged in the shallow end of the adult swimming pool, despite not being able to relate to the song ("walang hugot," in Filipino slang), I had the chorus memorized. "Bakit nga ba mahal kita kahit 'di pinapansin ang damdamin ko? 'Di mo man ako mahal, heto pa rin ako, nagmamahal nang tapat sa'yo," the lyrics went. They were that simple.

Almost two decades later, "Bakit Nga Ba" makes a comeback in the Filipino romantic comedy English Only, Please as the song Jennylyn Mercado's character sings on karaoke in front of Derek Ramsay. In her case—and she actually sings this for the both of them—there is definitely some hugot.

English Only, Please tells the story of English tutor Tere Madlangsacay (Mercado) who gets hired by New York-based Fil-Am Julian Parker (Ramsay) to translate a speech he has prepared. Tere is still hopelessly and foolishly in love with her cheating ex-boyfriend (Kean Cipriano) while Julian is angry and still hasn't come to terms with being dumped by his ex-girlfriend (Isabel Oli). Julian flies to the Philippines so Tere can teach him the translation of his speech, enabling him to recite it to his ex and maybe get her back, but he never gets to, or at least not as he had originally intended, because during the course of his and Tere's tutorial sessions, the two lovelorn "foolish hearts" fall in love with each other.

English Only, Please works as a romantic comedy because it is simple and has the right amounts of funny and romantic. Nothing is overdone. Not the story or the length of the movie. Not the urban dictionary word slides that serve as transition between scenes. Not Kean Cipriano's character's doucheyness. Not the way Derek Ramsay pronounces with an American accent the Filipino words his character is trying to learn. Not Jennylyn Mercado's make-up and costume (she really does look like a regular Manileña), and especially not her acting (I don't think Mercado has shined in any role the way she definitely has in this movie). Even the product placement of Dunkin Donuts, endorsed by Ramsay, isn't overly awkward. No wonder the rom-com won Best Actor, Best Actress and Best Director among many other accolades at the 40th Metro Manila Film Festival (shame it only won second place for Best Picture).

I normally stay away from romance films, even romantic comedies, but this one I knew I had to watch at the cinema with my friends from work. I was glad I could say "it was so funny I cried" at the end of the movie, although I didn't really get to make that excuse because everyone in our group, cynics and idealists alike, had tears in their eyes. It was the light and sweet ending we needed after a stressful day at the office.

I'd actually like to see English Only, Please again. And that's saying something for an MMFF movie.

Kitakits, beh.

My 2014 in video

2015-01-01T14:54:00.000+08:00

Because all the time and energy I had intended to use in writing a year-end blog post were allotted to video editing instead.

To Tess, with love

2014-12-30T21:00:00.000+08:00

Several months ago, a woman named Maritess Morillo came into my friend Cams' employ as cook and assistant. But Tess, as she likes to be called (though that has not stopped us from playfully calling her by many other nicknames), was more than just a kitchen goddess who very ably tended to Cams' needs, culinary or otherwise, as she recuperated from her injuries. She has become a dear friend to Cams, me and everyone around her in Manila.

Being a full-blooded Batangueña, she has also taught us many words, most of which I was able to note down on my phone for future reference:

Ukit - likot ("Ang ukit-ukit naman ni Johann eh!")
Utay-utayin - unti-untiin
Barik - lasing, nakainom ("Para kang barik!")
Utas - patay ("Utas kakatawa eh!")
Hasing-hasi - gustong-gusto
Usbaw - baliw
Guyam - langgam
Malubay - malambot
Hunta - usap ("Hindi ka naman kasali sa huntahan!")
Pulong - usap
Baktot - piggyback, buhat
Latiti - landi ("Nakikipaglatiti ka na naman!")
Umis - ngiti ("Ang ganda ng umis eh! Sino kaya ang ka-text?")
Babag - away, suntukan
Galpong - ground coffee, latak na kape
Ir-ir - grate
Bangi - grill
Sakol - magkamay (use hands when eating)
Asbar - hampas
Dais-dais - lapit-lapit, tabi-tabi

That list doesn't cover everything, nor does it capture how entertaining Tess is when she says those words. Tess, we might poke fun at you for sounding so angry most of the time (because of your accent), being somewhat gullible and having enormous you-know-whats, but you're one of the sweetest, most talented girls we've met and you know we love you as family. We will miss you and your deviled eggs, cordon bleu, leche flan and other unbelievably delicious recipes. See you in Singapore next year...and promise to let us dine for free when you finally have your very own restaurant!

Still keeping the promise that I won't post your unflattering candid shots, Tess. But always remember that I have them. For possible use in the future. Haha.

Why I don't like cabs, really

2014-12-18T23:44:00.000+08:00

I previously thought it was just that I am bad at remembering places and therefore terrible at giving directions, but I placed my finger on it last night. It's only partly because of picky drivers, the fare (especially the padagdag) and the stories one hears about sedation by gas and other modi operandi. It's more the awkwardness of being trapped in an enclosed space with a potentially psychotic driver.

My friend Kennan and I had dinner in Eastwood last night after I joined him for a workout at his gym. Exhausted, we decided to take a cab home, but no cab would take us until we finally got one at the taxi lane beside T. G. I. Friday's.

The cabbie was a middle-aged man who reminded me of my neighbor downstairs. He had a close crop which he scratched every time there was something that disappointed him (and whenever he did so, images of dandruff and lice falling down popped in my head).

"Sa Karangalan po tayo," we said. "Magsaysay (Street)."

"Naku! Magsaysay. Trapik dun. Bahala na kayo sa dagdag ha." Scratch, scratch, scratch.

"Sige ho, Marcos Highway na lang tayo. Pa-Imelda (Avenue) na lang para hindi traffic."

He thankfully obliged, but then saw traffic building up approaching LRT's Santolan station.

"Naku! Ayan na ang trapik." Scratch, scratch, scratch. Then, noticing that vehicles are actually moving, he said, "Ah, gumagalaw naman pala. Okay na 'yan."

He didn't go straight toward Sta. Lucia Mall to get to Imelda Ave., however. Instead, through no prompting from Kennan or me, he took the Ligaya route, which meant that to get to our destination we would have to take...

"Magsaysay na ho tayo nito," we reminded the driver.

"Naku! Magsaysay? Akala ko hindi kayo Magsaysay." Scratch, scratch, scratch, as if this were the first time he was hearing Magsaysay being mentioned and as if it wasn't his fault we were on that route in the first place.

We didn't actually take Magsaysay Street because of the experimental rerouting system in place in the area, but about a block away from our destination, he asked, "Aabot ba kayo ng Imelda?"

"Hindi na ho. Sa kanto na lang kami," we said to not further disappoint the cabbie. It was the truth anyway.

The meter was at about P100 when we stopped. Kennan gave P100 and I added P60, which Kennan thought was too much, but I hoped at least that was one less disappointment the cabbie didn't have to scratch his head for.

Kennan and I didn't choose our destination last night simply to spite the cab driver. It wasn't our fault Pasig's traffic management team likes to piss off motorists with confusing and inadequately disseminated experimental route changes (I just found out the routes in our area have been reverted to normal today. Scratch, scratch, scratch). But all my opinions aside about how horrible our country's road traffic is, my point is this: Like that highly overused Forrest Gump quote, you just never know what kind of cabbie you're gonna get out of the box of chocolates that is Metro Manila traffic. The universe is being nice to you when you're rejected outright as a passenger—at least you know upfront the cabbie's shitty, and you don't have to take that ride with him. It's bordering on cruelty when you get a chronic complainer like last night's, and I'm sure that's not even the worst type of cabbie out there.

Not counting almost all cab rides I've had in Baguio (where they give you your exact change automatically), probably the only outstandingly good memory I have of riding a cab was a month ago after I had just gotten back to Manila from my Siem Reap vacation. It was four in the morning and there were no more shuttles to Baclaran or the other airport terminals so I begrudgingly queued at the cab terminal above the one for the airport taxis. Thankfully, I got a cab driver who didn't greet me with how much he wanted his padagdag to be. He didn't stink of alcohol or human excrement, and he didn't feel the need to tell me his life story. He took me to Cubao at a daredevil speed, which I didn't mind, and his surprised reaction when I handed him P50 more than the final meter made me conclude he really deserved that tip. You know it's a twisted society we live in though when you have to tip someone for not telling you how much they'd like their tip to be, or that they even needed to be tipped in the first place.

Rock of Ages' 2014 Manila run

2014-11-09T04:30:00.000+08:00

I didn't get to see Rock of Ages the first time Atlantis Productions staged it here in the Philippines in 2012, but I got to see the repeat run last year...thrice (thanks to my friend Claire again, as always). Both runs were held in RCBC Plaza's Carlos P. Romulo Auditorium. The 2013 cast included Vina Morales, Nyoy Volante, MiG Ayesa, Jett Pangan, Jamie Wilson, Calvin Millado, Bibo Reyes, Aiza Seguerra and Rachel Alejandro. The stage was small and it was Vina Morales' first theater role, but the play did really well and I really enjoyed all three times I watched it.

For this year's very limited repeat run, Kayla Rivera replaces Vina in her role as Sherrie Christian, the wide-eyed girl from Paola, Kansas who moves to L.A. to pursue her dreams of becoming an actress. While Vina already exudes sultry rockstar confidence, which made her truly in character during the play's sexier scenes, Kayla, having a similar backstory as Sherrie's, manages to bring genuine innocence to the role. She might not have rock-hard abs or a rougher, growlier edge to her singing voice like her predecessor does, but Kayla could hit the high notes better and she certainly had more chemistry with Nyoy who plays Drew Boley, busboy at The Bourbon Room, aspiring rockstar and Sherrie's love interest.

Jinky Llamanzares played Justice Charlier during the musical's original run and she reprises the role this year. I liked Rachel Alejandro more though, because her pulling off portraying a matured "gentleman's club" owner (a.k.a. a "madame") at her age was really impressive. Jinky undeniably has a more powerful voice, however, and she's more natural on stage, owing to her many years of theater experience both here and abroad. At one point last Friday when I watched Rock of Ages with my friends, she slipped (I think on her costume's train) and fell on her side, but she made it look like it was part of the choreography, quickly getting back on her feet and still singing, hitting the high notes like nothing happened. I wanted to give her a standing ovation right then and there.

It was a shame Aiza Seguerra couldn't join Rock of Ages this year. Thea Tadiar Everley in her role as Regina is fantastic, but Aiza brought the role, minor though it may be, to a completely different level. She was comical as Regina, and even more so as Candy (you have to have seen the play to appreciate it).

One other actress I would have liked to have retained her role was the one who did the reporter interviewing Stacee Jaxx in the "Wanted Dead or Alive" number. She reminded me of a certain local comedienne, in that she had a big smile and was funny, yet there was a sexiness in the way she moved, running her fingers up her curly faux-hawk before strutting off the stage at the end of the dance numbers she was in. I remember my friend Claire saying she's a mother already, making her playing the double role of a sexy waitress in fishnets doubly impressive.

The mainstays of the musical are brilliant as usual. Whether it's due to added theater experience or being paired with someone he's more comfortable with in real life for his love interest, Nyoy Volante seems more natural in his role as Drew Boley, especially in the scenes with Kayla. MiG Ayesa is convincing as Stacee Jaxx, disbanding rock group Arsenal's lead singer with shiny washboard abs, and he should be because he's played him since Rock of Ages' first U.S. national tour in 2011.

Jett Pangan, wearing a mullet as Lonny Barnett and narrator, is hilarious as ever, still bringing the house down with Jamie Wilson as Dennis Dupree in their "Can't Fight This Feeling" number. Calvin Millado is intimidating as Hertz Klinemann, the German land developer who wants to rid The Sunset Strip of its rock-'n'-roll image, and with him again is Bibo Reyes who plays his son Franz, all cute and submissive to his father, until Hertz's overbearing attitude forces Franz's claws—or rather, his sequined boxing attire, shinier than ever—to come out. That "Hit Me With Your Best Shot" number along with Regina is always one of the highlights of Rock of Ages, though again it would have been much more hilarious with Aiza Seguerra in it.

Being held at Meralco Theater in Ortigas this time around, the set is bigger, giving the actors more freedom to move about. The decorations outlining the stage (I won't say what they are) are more visible because they're more scattered about and in better lighting. It is regretful that some members of the cast couldn't reprise their roles in this year's limited rerun, but with a heartwarming, rockified story about love and dreams told under the direction of Chari Arespacochaga with musical direction by Ceejay Javier, Rock of Ages still is a fantastic play. No matter your age, you'll no doubt be familiar with one song in the musical at the very least (most probably "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey) and be able to sing along with the cast. There are two shows today at 3 and 8 PM. Go catch either one as today's their last day.

First time at Ramen Nagi and Magnum Manila

2014-11-04T23:30:00.000+08:00

Some office friends and I had a few birthdays and work accomplishments worth celebrating, so we decided to eat out last night, but outside Eastwood City this time. Our chosen destination: SM Aura Premier (which I've never been to since its opening, mostly because some architectural features in the exterior seem sketchy to me). My suggested restaurant which we all have never been to and therefore agreed on: Ramen Nagi.

Ramen Nagi only has four branches in the Philippines so far (SM Mall of Asia, SM Aura Premier, SM North EDSA and Robinsons Magnolia) though its franchise extends globally. We arrived at its fifth-floor location in SM Aura Premier and were fortunate enough to have been seated almost right away. Synchronized shouts of "Irasshaimase!" ("Welcome!") from Ramen Nagi's wait staff greeted us at the door. Not sure if it was the lack of bowing real Japanese-style but it felt just a tad like I was entering an SM Supermarket right after their bell has signaled for them to do their clap-thrice-HAPPY-TO-SERVE thing.

We were handed our order slips on small clipboards for us to customize our ramen, and the choices were Butao King (original ramen base), Black King (garlic, squid ink), Red King (spicy ramen base), Green King (basil, cheese) and Limited King, a limited ramen which they rotate through their other ramen flavors like, currently, the Ebi King. For ramen beginners, our waiter recommended Butao King with spiciness level at 1. I was hungry and didn't want to think too much about what I was ordering, so I did as he said and then ticked "Chef's recommendation" for the rest of the ramen elements.

Ramen Nagi' order slip

Despite the menu having the disclaimer that waiting time is at least 15-20 minutes, our order arrived surprisingly fast. I've never been to Japan, have only tried ramen at Teriyaki Boy so far, and could only reference anime like Naruto and that ridiculous film called Ramen Girl for the popular Japanese noodle dish, but I think that Ramen Nagi's Butao King pretty much nails how gourmet ramen really should be. Not surprising as Ramen Nagi's chefs are ramen masters after all.

Butao King, chef's recommendation

We also ordered curry spring rolls and chicken karaage, which were both delicious.

Chicken karaage

After dinner, we went for desserts at Magnum Manila, also on the fifth floor of SM Aura Premier. I love Magnum, especially its almond and gold variants, and being a sweet tooth in general, the idea of getting to customize my own Magnum bar seemed a very exciting endeavor.

Magnum Manila at SM Aura Premier

Upon entering, we were asked by a waitress whether we were ordering plated desserts, which meant we needed to be seated, or were just customizing our own Magnum bars, which meant we could go for take-out. The place wasn't even half-full, so I'm guessing this was just preemptive crowd control. We opted to order plated desserts so we could be seated, despite our original plan of only trying the Make Your Own Magnum Dessert Bar.

Apple pie crumble

Magnum Manila's plated desserts are basically at least one Magnum bar in a plate of cake slice, pastry or fruits. There were five of us and since the plated desserts could be shared, we decided to order three: apple pie crumble, red velvet and Death by Chocolate. The first two are exactly as they are named. Death by Chocolate is deep dark chocolate lava cake and a chocolate truffle Magnum bar topped with brownie bits and chocolate crispearls. Being their bestselling plated dessert, it needs about 15 minutes' prep time.

Red velvet

Death by Chocolate

I'm uncertain whether it was because I was sharing plates with friends or I simply have a really high sweetness threshold, but I didn't enjoy the desserts very much. Or maybe it's because they were a bit impractical (for each dessert I could have ordered a dozen original glazed Krispy Kreme donuts and would have been way more satisfied). Still, Magnum Manila's desserts are delicious, and it cannot be denied that they are unique.

Magnum Manila is big for an establishment that serves mostly desserts, and beautifully decorated, with photos of inspiration Magnum bars by the booths, and their M logo and an art installation of the Banaue Rice Terraces made using many, many Magnum sticks. The place also serves hot meals, many of which I wanted to try after seeing their menu. Visit them before their one year at SM Aura Premier is up. That branch is just a pop-up pleasure store after all.

If it's Halloween it must indeed be Saw

2014-10-28T23:15:00.000+08:00

As a kid, I was scared of the dark. But I slowly outgrew that fear, learning that if there's anything I should really be afraid of, it must be things that could actually harm me. The 10th anniversary Halloween re-release of the highly successful horror film franchise Saw reminds us of this. It's not maleficent spirits or blood-thirsty vampires (sparkly or otherwise) we should fear in this world, but people like John Kramer, a.k.a. Jigsaw, the deranged serial killer in the film series.

The first of four 10th anniversary Saw posters

There are seven Saw films, each one released yearly since 2004 around Halloween, the last being Saw 3D: The Final Chapter which I remember seeing with a date four years ago (romantic, right?). The only other installment I've seen prior was Saw II and it was just earlier this year that it occurred to me I should watch all seven. I was on sick leave and had nothing better to do, so I cooked some instant noodles and watched film after bloody film while eating.

Posters of all seven films in the Saw franchise, some of them banned for graphic content

John Kramer was normal once, a civil engineer married to a rehab clinic owner pregnant with their boy...until an accident caused his wife to have a miscarriage. He became vengeful, pushing his wife away and he sank even deeper when he found out he had cancer. After surviving a suicide attempt caused him to appreciate the value of his life, he made it his mission, a sort of philanthropy, to cause others to be "reborn" the same way by testing their wills to live.

Billy, the puppet Jigsaw uses in his tests as a visual representation of himself explaining the rules his victim has to follow to survive

Thus The Jigsaw Killer was born, though it wasn't long until he eventually had to succumb to death too. Even posthumously, however, his legacy of teaching the value of life to those who are squandering it away is continued by protégés. "Live or die. Make your choice," Jigsaw would always tell his victims. If they fail, they die, and by their own hands, as he saw it. They might lose an eye or a couple of limbs, but if they succeed, they're the better for it.

As deranged as John Kramer was, I couldn't help but admire him for his genius, planning everything to the last detail, with every test and death trap tailor-fit for each of his chosen victims. Tobin Bell's portrayal of him was exceptional, "more terrifying than the movie villains in Hollywood's last five horror films put together," a San Francisco Chronicle review had put it, "...even though he's in a wheelchair and hooked up to multiple IVs." That's one guy you definitely do not want to mess with, lest you wake up from sedation alone in a strange room, with the reverse beartrap locked around your neck, threatening to rip your jaws apart in a minute.

The reverse beartrap, the deadly contraption one of Jigsaw's victims Amanda Young was able to survive

There have been rumors of a Saw VIII being in the works and no one has clearly dismissed this as untrue. Leigh Whannell, actor and writer for Saw, has expressed interest in returning to the film franchise, and Saw director James Wan himself has said in an interview, "I think the Saw universe, the Saw brand, is too big to just let it just sit there on a shelf. I'll say that much." So I guess until we finally hear that this next installment is either completely happening or not at all, American fans can just make do with the theatrical re-release of the first-ever Saw in select theaters around them this Halloween.