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Not Indulging In Anger

2012-02-08T17:30:00.001+11:00

Anger is incredibly debilitating. We come into practice searching, wanting to take care of our questions and doubts. But we carry into our practice all the baggage that has prevented our life from unfolding harmoniously. The baggage is our entangled conglomeration of ideas and positions that have worked together to cause our suffering. It is the deep-seated conditioning that has stifled us and impinged on the lives of others.

We cover the inherent perfection that is originally there with our self-created notion of separateness. When somebody get ahead of us in the dokusan line or moves ahead of us in their practice, we feel that we lose ground, and we get angry. But if we understand that there is no distinction between the two of us, we immediately return to accord with reality, and there is no anger. Yasutani Roshi said that in getting angry we actually break all three dimensions of the precepts - the literal, the compassionate, and the one-mind.

- John Daido Loori in The Heart of Being

Rohatsu Sesshin

2011-12-19T08:11:00.000+11:00

A little late out the gate, but it I've been meaning to write something about Rohatsu.

Our Rohatsu Sesshin was a city based event, where you arrived every morning for the first block of zazen, stayed all day, then went home after the last. Aside from having to tackle the traffic and deal with your domestic and conjugal duties, one also had (well...) to master moving in and out of the great silence in order to obtain a quality cappuccino from the local cafe. This on top of the usual dokusan and leaders meetings and you quickly learn to either settle quickly or not at all.

I suppose having subjected myself to several retreats over the recent months paid off, because, for some reason, and perhaps the coffee did have something to do with it, I found myself in a joyous, open and playful space, a happy place that almost became a concern. I'm a young and relatively inexperienced practitioner, but I'm experienced enough to know that being cocky is one way to fall flat on your face.

I continued to sit with what was, respected the space I was rewarded with possibly the most enjoyable sesshin I've had the pleasure of participating in. My Jiki roll was more a delight than duty and I moved easily between the great emptiness and the empty forms that define it.

Now a great empty space, now the myriad forms of the Christmas period. "May we retain this mind and extend it throughout the world."

Time, Place and Position

2011-12-09T10:30:00.000+11:00

It seems sort of strange that within practice some things are holy and some aren't. There's a saying about "when you're cold burn the Buddha." Yet when you go to the bathroom you hang your rakusu up with total respect. How do we decide what is the right attitude?

First of all, keep in mind what Master Dogen said about this: "Those who regard the mundane as a hindrance to practice only understand that in the mundane nothing is sacred; they have not yet understood that in sacredness nothing is mundane." Once you understand sacredness, you understand that it reaches everywhere. But, also keep in mind that teachers, in teaching, respond to specific situations; to particular time, place, and position. A monk asked Zhaozhou, "Does a dog have Buddha nature?" Zhaozhou said, "No." Another monk came and asked Zhaozhou the same question. Zhaozhou said, "Yes." Zhaozhou expressed the truth in both situations. The teacher who burned the wooden buddha statue and was warming his butt next to the fire was responding to people who had become attached to liturgy and iconography. They thought that the form was the reality. In this country, at this time, everybody is ready to burn buddhas. We need to learn to bow to the buddha. We need to learn to respect the inanimate. We need to see that the teachings are everywhere. It's a very different lesson. When we reach a point when liturgy and form are second nature to us, and we are tightly wrapped up in them, then we'll start burning buddhas, rakasus, and robes.

- John Daido Loori in Bringing the Sacred to Life

Object of Mind

2011-12-08T22:02:00.001+11:00

When you consider mind as one of the organs of perception, the concept of reality expands beyond the boundaries usually accepted in the West. The object of mind is thought; mind, thought, and consciousness thus create a reality. The thought of hitting someone is just as much an action as physically hitting, or expressing the desire to hit, someone. And just as speech and action produce karma, so do our thoughts.

- John Daido Loori in Bringing the Sacred to Life

The Way of Zen

2011-11-20T17:58:00.000+11:00

Zen to be fully and authentically Zen, it has to be religious. Stripped of being religious, Zen loses its heart and soul. Zen is a way of salvation and liberation, not merely one of healing, relaxation, peace and quiet. Zen is marvelous and profound, but it is utterly demanding and challenging. Zen calls for a radical self-emptying, and it is also a radical challenge to religions - "Kill the Buddha if you meet him/her on the way!"

- Ama Samy in The Way of Zen

Your original face

2011-11-19T17:37:00.000+11:00

The original face is spaciousness. It is letting be. It is being. It is realized in Zazen practice. Dogen says that Zazen practice is the dropping of body and mind. This means that your body and mind are not separate individual substances. Your self is the universe and the universe is sitting in zazen. All the world is manifested in this awareness and emptiness. So take care! What about no thoughts, no fantasies, no imaginations and no emotions? When there are no imaginations and no thoughts or fantasies, you cannot become aware of your original face! The point is not to identify yourself with any particular thing; this is the point of no-thought. When Zen says no thought, no imagination and no emotions, it does not mean literally no thoughts and no imagination, just that you should not identify yourself with these. You are greater and bigger! You are not simply your emotion, thoughts and you are not simply your problems. These things are important and you must care for them but you are greater; you are greater and deeper! You have a depth that embraces the whole universe. The self embraces the whole universe.

- Ama Samy in Your Original Face

Conflict in life

2011-11-18T16:04:00.000+11:00

Remember that our Life is saying "YES". With Yes though, there is always "No". Without the no, you cannot say yes. You must be able to say no. Without no, your yes is useless and powerless. You are saying yes, but at the same time be able to say no.

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First of all, we have to know that, and learn to accept our own ambiguities. Sometimes, we want everything to be clear but that cannot be. Sometimes, yes, you can ask for clarity but not always. Sometimes you have to learn to live in ambiguity and carry on; it is not always possible to be clear. Certain relationships, love, yourself and where you stand, these cannot always be clear. Understand I am speaking of generalities, but remember all these things. Secondly, also remember, there are your own values to consider; what are you standing for? This is very important. For, when you stand for something you need to say no to what is against it.

- Ama Samy in Conflict in life

The virtues of solitude

2011-11-18T03:59:00.000+11:00

Beyond the restoration of stability, meditative practice also opens a private interior space, where thoughts and feelings can arrive, abide, and run their course, unhindered by judgment or repression. As Elizabeth Mattis-Namgyel, a practitioner of Tibetan Buddhism, puts it, meditative space "doesn't do—it allows." It "allows objects to come into being, to function, to expand, to contract, to move around, and to disappear without interference." For those unaccustomed to prolonged sitting, one of those "objects" might be the impulse to do something—anything—beside sit still: to "tweet" or "text" a friend, or otherwise reconnect with the outer world. Within the openness of meditative space, however, that impulse can be allowed to announce itself, make its case, and gradually dissipate, precipitating no immediate action. Later on, having gained some insight into our mental activities, we can indeed reconnect with other people, perhaps at a deeper level than we would have, had we merely obeyed a passing impulse or indulged a habit of connectivity.

- Ben Howard in The virtues of solitude

Not Sparing Dharma Assets

2011-11-17T15:18:00.001+11:00

Every other month at the SZC, we replace Wednesday night's usual two hours of zazen with a single period, followed by a short full moon and precept recitation ceremony, and an hour’s discussion on one of the precepts. Last Wednesday we discussed "Not Sparing Dharma Assets" and as Jiki, I was to start the sharing. Knowing this in advanced, I did some study on the topic, reading the relevant chapters of The Mind of Clover by Aitken Roshi, The Heart of Being by Daido Loori and Being Upright by Reb Anderson.

The first thing that stood out to me was that all three teachers mentioned something about being yourself. Reb Anderson talks about being who you are "so completely, fully, joyfully, enthusiastically, kindly and compassionately, that others see and feel it and are inspired and encouraged to be fully themselves as well." He goes on to say that by giving yourself to others in this way, you give others to themselves too. Aitken Roshi isn't so overt about this point, but mentions that "each individual comes forth as the Tathagata, coming forth as its own being, with nothing identical to it anywhere at any time" and in doing so "teaching and relinquishing everything." Daido Loori talks about having no choice but to give, and that "just being there" is often the best way to fulfil this precept.

Following on from that, I was struck by a sentence in Being Upright where Reb Anderson says that this precept isn't about "repressing stinginess but about active expression." Expression is something that I've been obsessing over recently, which might seem absurd when Daido Loori says how it is "ridiculous to even attempt to be withholding." And it's true. We can't help but express our self, our every action and inaction speaks volumes, and yet I so often feel unable to properly express myself. Aitken Roshi talks about "a tomato plant adding itself to the soil for the sake of other tomato plants" and suggests we act "with no more self-consciousness than the tomato plant." How often do we allow ourselves that kind of expression? I for one find it difficult to allow myself such freedom, my 'expression' filtered by own small-self-consciousness, if it gets out at all. In this way I break this precept every day.

But I labour onwards, oftentimes thanks to a question I first heard from Paul Haller, "What does practice ask of me?" Reb Anderson suggests in every situation, in each moment, to ask "what is being asked of me?" This precept seems to be encouraging you not only to ask this question moment to moment, but to respond with the self-consciousness of Aitken Roshi's tomato plant.

Finally, there are the clouds. Not mentioned specifically by Aitken Roshi, Daido Loori or Reb Anderson, but in a kids book that my partner Mel reads to her children at work. The book, called Peaceful Piggy, recommends a mindfulness exercise that, if practiced, will have you paying attention to clouds that "tell stories just for you." I think of my own early morning mindfulness practice, zazen on my cushion, and think of the many times I've bowed in grateful thanks to the birds, planes, cars and trains that have told stories just for me. I really do wonder sometimes, am I the only one paying attention? My small egotistical enquiries aside, all three teachers suggest that simply by being present, you are keeping this precept. Aitken Roshi ends his Teisho on "Not Sparing Dharma Assets" by saying "Return to Mu, and your act of lifting your spoon to your mouth will be a fulfillment of this precept."

Of course, this precept is about much more than just these points, but for me right now, this is what stood out as significant.

Being nobody, knowing nothing

2011-10-19T09:03:00.003+11:00

What is the self? What is personality? Don’t be afraid of being a personality, but rather, be conscious of it. Personality arises and ceases in consciousness. It changes according to conditions. But awareness is a constant thing, although we might forget it, getting lost in the momentum of emotions and habits.

If you consciously notice this awareness, and appreciate it, you move more towards being nobody, towards not knowing anything at all, rather than being someone who knows everything about everything, and having all the answers to all the questions, and knowing the solutions to every problem. To be nobody knowing nothing is scary, isn’t it? But this attitude helps to direct us, because there is a strong desire in us to become, to attain and achieve. Even with the best of intentions, if that kind of desire is not recognised, it will always control you, whether it is the desire to become something, the desire to control things, or the desire to get rid of annoying things or bad thoughts or irritations around you. So trust in this awareness, this openness, this receptivity, attention, listening. And question the personality.

- Ajahn Sumedho in Self-view, Personality and Awareness via it's all dhamma

Capitalism feeding monkey mind

2011-10-18T22:28:00.001+11:00

Clarity and perseverance are difficult in American society because the basis of capitalism is greed and dissatisfaction. There is always a better stereo system, television, car, and shoe. Why should we settle on writing, when next week we can take up hang gliding? The American economic system feeds monkey mind. We stimulate monkey mind when we swing from one preoccupation to the next.

- Natalie Goldberg in Wild Mind: Living the Writer's Life

Relating to your mind

2011-10-13T11:15:00.003+11:00

There is no ultimate goal in meditation. Meditation is an acceptance of the mind, however it comes to you. And the mind changes all the time, just as the ocean waves change. Sometimes the water is turbulent, sometimes calm. Thoughts rise and then disappear; you don’t grab hold of them. The heart beats, the lungs breathe, and the mind continues to produce thoughts. Even if you’ve practiced for a long time, it will still produce thoughts, but you’re no longer thrown by them. You don’t have control of your mind; it goes where it wants to go. But with practice, you can have a relationship with it.

- Natalie Goldberg in The Sun Magazine

Mistaking various images for one object

2011-10-11T11:37:00.003+11:00

Both what and how we see are intricately interwoven with our conditioning. We see what we have learned to see. If we come out of our house in midday and see a yellow barn surrounded by a forest, that image becomes a part of our memory. Later, at the end of the day, when the evening sun is sinking over the horizon and the once yellow barn and green trees have been transformed by the fiery orange hue, we may miss that change. Our tendency will be to remember the yellow and green unless a deliberate effort is made to see things as they are. In the glow of twilight the house may have a pinkish tone. Trees will turn purple. Yet our mind, if we let it be controlled and fixed by our memory, will only see the afterimages of the past.

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I sit here each evening and look at the same things and each evening find that I see different things. The renown Japanese Zen teacher and mystic, Eihei Dogen once asked, "Is it that there are various ways of seeing one object? Or is it that we have mistaken various images for one object?" His words come back to me again and again; ripples on the water expanding in widening circles, reaching out endlessly.

- John Daido Loori Roshi in Making Love With Light

Living Zen

2011-10-10T08:04:00.002+11:00

Let us now consider Mumon's comment. He begins by saying: "In the practice of Zen..." Zazen, receiving dokusan [that is, private instructions], hearing teisho - these are all Zen practice. Being attentive in the details of your daily life is also training in Zen. When your life and Zen are one you are truly living Zen. Unless it accords with your everyday activities Zen is merely an embellishment. You must be careful not to flaunt Zen but to blend it unpretentiously into your life.

- Hakuun Yasutani in Sitting with Koans

Dasa Side

2011-10-08T14:42:00.000+11:00

The dialect of Hawaii is a kind of baby talk for adults, and its use brings forth a sense of intimacy. Carpenters and other people on the job will use the expressions "dasa side" or "dada side," rather than "the other side." They know the orthodox English perfectly well, but they enjoy sharing the diminutive, and smile at each other. The dialect is the despair of some English teachers, and a pretext that bigoted people will use to justify their prejudices, but actually it builds and maintains community. Eh, Brah!

- Robert Aitken Roshi, Miniatures of a Zen Master

Ailments of Old Age

2011-10-07T14:45:00.000+11:00

Hong Zicheng said, "The ailments of old age are really those incurred in youthful times. Weakness in one's last years is really something wrought in the prime of life. Therefore, when life is at its peak, the noble person endeavors exactingly to take full care in every way." The problem with this truism is that usually by the time it rings true, it's too late.

- Robert Aitken Roshi, Miniatures of a Zen Master

RIP Steve Jobs

2011-10-06T13:44:00.002+11:00

May you rest in deepest samadhi.

Be sure to check out Steve Jobs' 2005 Stanford Commencement Address, where he talks about Beginners Mind, Impermanence, and expressing your Buddha Nature, although perhaps he doesn't use those exact words.

What an inspiration. Remember his words when you grab your iPod to listen to some music or go for a run, when you pick up your iPhone to make a phone call, or sit down at your iMac to do some work. "There is no reason not to follow your heart."

Thanks Daring Fireball for reminding me of this address.

Edit: Oh, according to Wikipedia Steve Jobs was a Buddhist! So he literally was talking about Beginners Mind, Impermanence, and expressing your Buddha Nature. I had no idea!

The Gateless Gate

2011-10-05T20:17:00.003+11:00

On the verge of their awakening, some hear the sound of a temple bell; some glance at a cloud in the sky. These are examples of karma-relation. Some monks pass their koans under their master's beating whip; some attain it while washing their faces in the morning. No matter how hard you try, however, you cannot find the karma-relation that will enlighten you by looking for it. Instead of seeking out your karma-relation, devote yourself to constant meditation, with no desire for attainment. Then the doors of the gateless gate will open for you by themselves.

- Nyogen Senzaki, Like a dream, like a fantasy

Old Age

2011-10-05T06:57:00.000+11:00

Mae West said, "Old age ain't no place for sissies." Yes, that's true. One must cope with a range of afflictions, from incontinence to macular degeneration, not to mention peripheral neuropathy, strokes, and cancer-and memory loss! Yet I don't mourn my lost youth. What a confused mess I was! What time I wasted! All in all, I am really quite comfortable in these last years. Pass the marmalade!

- Robert Aitken Roshi, Miniatures of a Zen Master

This is a scheduled post. I'm back, but need some time to catch up on my reading. Here is some more of Aitken Roshi's Dharma.

Remembered in Museums

2011-10-04T14:38:00.000+11:00

As a boy I read about the complete extermination of the original people of Tasmania. I remember reflecting that I would find such a land to be barren-and I couldn't live in such a place. There I was in Hawaii, oblivious of a history of desecration that differed only in degree from the loss in Tasmania. There I was in the United States, where entire flesh-and-blood cultures are remembered only in museums. It is all too easy to be oblivious to one's own involvement.

- Robert Aitken Roshi, Miniatures of a Zen Master

This is a scheduled post. I'm back, but need some time to catch up on my reading. Here is some more of Aitken Roshi's Dharma.

Beliefs

2011-10-03T14:33:00.000+11:00

You will hear that Bodhidharma was the founder of the martial arts. That's okay. He's not around to affirm or deny. Some people believe that angels rolled away the stone that sealed the tomb of Jesus Christ. That's okay. Now if you'll excuse me, that was the bell for zazen.

- Robert Aitken Roshi, Miniatures of a Zen Master

This is a scheduled post. I'm no longer on Sesshin, but will be away for a few more days. Here is some more of Aitken Roshi's Dharma.

My Damned Mother

2011-10-02T14:19:00.000+11:00

In the early days of my Zen practice, I had a problem with my mother. She had expressed doubt about my trustworthiness in a money matter, although it was something I had taken care of honorably. The zendo would be totally silent, everything would be supportive of good zazen, and I would sit there with the mantra, "My damned mother!" Maybe if I had been guilty I wouldn't have been so troubled. My problem was self-righteousness, after all.

- Robert Aitken Roshi, Miniatures of a Zen Master

This is a scheduled post. I'm no longer on Sesshin, but will be away for a few more days. Here is some more of Aitken Roshi's Dharma.

Important Work

2011-10-01T14:13:00.000+10:00

I have the utmost admiration for students who stick with the practice despite all kinds of adverse circumstances. Listening to their accounts of arising early and doing zazen alone every morning of the week no matter how tired they are, I recall my own diligence long ago, and I include myself in my admiration. What important work we are doing!

- Robert Aitken Roshi, Miniatures of a Zen Master

This is a scheduled post. I'm no longer on Sesshin, but will be away for a few more days. Here is some more of Aitken Roshi's Dharma.

It's my birthday!

2011-09-30T15:25:00.000+10:00

I'm still at Sesshin so this is another scheduled post, but a very special one - today is my Dharma birthday! Exactly one year ago today I took Jukai and was given the name Sei Shin (Clear Heart).

To celebrate this fact, I am posting the precepts of Bodhidharma and Dogen Zenji. In the Diamond Sangha we recite these precepts together during full moon and jukai ceremonies. They are jam packed with meaning and significance and certainly inspired my own personal vows.

Practicing the precepts has become my life. I can't think of a better way to say that. They are significant and relevant every day, in every situation. Zen's moral and ethical teachings (Sila) are given as much significance as zazen (Samadhi). Without practicing either one, there can be no genuine wisdom (Prajna). As Aitken Roshi says, students that don't practice leaning on nothing in their own daily lives "are like the elementary school student whose education is just a series of workbooks."

I'm doing a terrible job here trying to explain things here, or articulating the immense significance and relevence of the precepts so I'll leave it to Bodhidharma and Dogen.

The First Grave Precept: Not Killing

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the realm of the everlasting Dharma, not giving rise to concepts of killing is called the Precept of Not Killing."

Dogen Zenji: "The Buddha-seed grows in accordance with not taking life. Transmit the life of Buddha's wisdom and do not kill."

The Second Grave Precept: Not Stealing

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the realm of the unattainable Dharma, not having thoughts of gaining is called the Precept of Not Stealing."

Dogen Zenji: "The self and the things of the world are just as they are. The gate of emancipation is open."

The Third Grave Precept: Not Misusing Sex

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the realm of the ungilded Dharma, not creating a veneer of attachment is called the Precept of Not Misusing Sex."

Dogen Zenji: "The Three Wheels are pure and clear. When you have nothing to desire, you follow the way of all Buddhas."

The Fourth Grave Precept: Not Lying

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the realm of the inexplicable Dharma, not preaching a single word is called the Precept of Not Lying."

Dogen Zenji: "The Dharma wheel turns from the beginning. There is neither surplus nor lack. The whole universe is moistened with nectar, and the truth is ready to harvest."

The Fifth Grave Precept: Not Giving or Taking Drugs

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the realm of the intrinsically pure Dharma, not giving rise to delusions is called the Precept of Not Giving or Taking Drugs."

Dogen Zenji: "Drugs are not brought in yet. Don't let them invade. That is the great light."

The Sixth Grave Precept: Not Discussing Faults of Others

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the realm of the flawless Dharma, not expounding upon error is called the Precept of Not Speaking of Faults of Others."

Dogen Zenji: "In the Buddha Dharma, there is one path, one Dharma, one realization, one practice. Don't permit fault-finding. Don't permit haphazard talk."

The Seventh Grave Precept: Not Praising Yourself While Abusing Others

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the realm of the equitable Dharma, not dwelling upon I against you is called the Precept of Not Praising Yourself While Abusing Others."

Dogen Zenji: "Buddhas and Ancestral Teachers realize the empty sky and the great earth. When they manifest the noble body, there is neither inside nor outside in emptiness. When they manifest the Dharma body there is not even a bit of earth on the ground."

The Eighth Grave Precept: Not Sparing the Dharma Assets

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the genuine, all-pervading Dharma, not being stingy about a single thing is called the Precept of Not Sparing the Dharma Assets."

Dogen Zenji: "One phrase, one verse - that is the ten thousand things and one hundred grasses; one dharma, one realization - that is all Buddhas and Ancestral Teachers. Therefore, from the beginning, there has been no stinginess at all."

The Ninth Grave Precept: Not Indulging in Anger

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the realm of the selfless Dharma, not contriving reality for the self is called the Precept of Not Indulging in Anger."

Dogen Zenji: "Not advancing, not retreating, not real, not empty. There is an ocean of bright clouds. There is an ocean of solemn clouds."

The Tenth Grave Precept: Not Defaming the Three Treasures

Bodhidharma: "Self-nature is subtle and mysterious. In the realm of the One, not holding dualistic concepts of ordinary beings and sages is called the Precept of Not Defaming the Three Treasures."

Dogen Zenji: "The teisho of the actual body is the harbor and the weir. This is the most important thing in the world. Its virtue finds its home in the ocean of essential nature. It is beyond explanation. We just accept it with respect and gratitude."

Upright Livelihood

2011-09-29T14:11:00.000+10:00

"Upright Livelihood" is a step on the Eightfold Path. The Buddha warned that the job of guarding prisoners is not upright. Incredibly, there are two million people or more in prison in the United States today. It would take massive deviation from the Eightfold Path to keep the system going. No wonder people call Buddhism unrealistic.

- Robert Aitken Roshi, Miniatures of a Zen Master

This is a scheduled post. I'm currently on Sesshin at Kodoji, Ancient Ground Temple, a Zendo opened by Robert Aitken Roshi. It seems appropriate to share his Dharma with you whilst I'm away.