John Smith

2012-02-03T16:02:00.002+11:00

To: Mr John Smith
Department of Market Analysis
Broderick, Smith, Jones, Johnson and sons Associates
Levels 67-75, 10001 White Rd
Tallahassee, FL USA

3rd February 2012

Dear John Smith,

First of all, we would like to congratulate you on a life well lived thus far. You are a stock broker of some esteem, you have a loving wife and two adorable children. We have especially enjoyed watching your many sexual exploits and achievements. Also, your house is pretty whack.

However, our records indicate that your assigned purpose was in fact to become the world's preeminent authority on giraffe breeding. Given the choices you have made, you may find this news to be a bit of shock and we offer our humblest apologies.

Regardless, we require you to make all necessary arrangements to cease your current worldly endeavors and commence immediately along the path you were assigned.

Best regards (to you and the giraffes!),

The Powers That Be

Letters of Purpose

2012-02-02T14:51:00.002+11:00

Dear Everybody,

First of all, let us congratulate each and everyone of you for doing a bang up job so far. We're really impressed and, frankly, it has all gone a bit better than we had hoped. Although, we lost a fairly significant bet in the process.

But, no matter.

The reason for this letter is to inform you of a new policy we're instituting. We're a bit tired of a lot of you complaining that "life has no purpose" or similar. There has been a lot of whinging directed our way that you would be happy if you knew exactly what purpose we here had in mind for you.

To that end, you will all be receiving a letter informing you of your intended purpose. Contrary to what some might have you believe, everyone's purpose was carefully chosen, well thought out and recorded. It is true that the records are somewhat haphazard and disorganized. But, fear not, we've got a crack team working on sorting them out and getting your letters to you.

Now, there are obviously a lot of you and we can only process and send out so many at a time. So, please bare with us and we thank you for your patience.

Best Regards,

The Powers That Be