I started crying at this point:

Things definitely went downhill from here:

I learned last week that soccer fans don’t know a damn thing about hockey trophies and that hockey fans take symbols very seriously.

My greatest accomplishment over the past week was just … getting through the week.

The most memorable moment came from Saturday’s disappointments. I’d planned for a couple of weeks to hang out with Aya at her school friend’s birthday party.  She wanted me to go with her, so I promised I would.  I was sick Saturday morning, decided to go anyway because a promise is a promise.  When we got there, despite Brian’s assertions to the contrary,  we were told that the parents essentially weren’t invited.

And, predictably, I got in a huge fight with Brian on the way home.  The things he said — I don’t even know why I stay with him anymore.   He’s my biggest time sink.  Nothing like supporting someone for 15 years when they haven’t once returned the favor, either emotionally or financially.

Thank you to my twin, for letting me cry on her shoulder.

I didn’t do any writing all week.  Got stuck on a story for a contest - needs a good introduction to pull the whole thing together, and I’m not sure I’ll be able to wrap it up before the deadline.

I also still need to get Aya’s Halloween costume.  We’ve settled on Hermione Granger.

9:39 PM Lil: there are so many things wrong with that one I’m not sure where to start
9:39 PM Eve: It does not make me want Chinese food.
9:39 PM Lil: I could go for some plain abalone buttons up the duck, dunno what your problem is

I laughed and waited for the obligatory “don’t you dare put this on your blog” comment.  She didn’t say anything.

9:41 PM Eve: Just, um, how irritated will you be with me if I copy and paste that onto my blog?
9:41 PM Lil: I don’t mind.
9:41 PM Lil: It’s not like I’ve never expressed a weird taste for something before

I started copying and pasting. Down the hall, I heard my twin start snickering, then my IM window flashed again.

9:45 PM Lil: http://lee.org/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/36.jpg
9:45 PM Lil: it just gets funnier and funnier as i look at it
9:46 pm Eve: WHAARGARBL
9:46 PM Lil: whaarrgarbl
9:46 PM Lil: WHARRGARBL

Aya’s distressed… hospitals = scary.

I got home from a long commute to realize my car wasn’t in the driveway and no one was home. Checked my cell phone and had a voice mail from Brian explaining that his dad was having severe pain in his side and throwing up and he was taking him to the hospital.  His sister couldn’t, because she was at work.  And could I come get Aya when I got the message, so the little one didn’t have to wait around the ER?

So I went and got her.  And I snarked at Brian.  This is not the first time I have been in the position to question  the wisdom of having a family member drive you to the emergency room when you’re in severe pain, rather than calling for an ambulance.  Particularly when that family member you want to drive is responsible for caring for a young child.  It was probably wrong to snark at him, but he’s been far from supportive when I’ve been dealing with family emergencies.

Got home, scrubbed Aya’s hands with hot soapy water, got her dinner, let her play on my computer for a while, put her in the shower.  We watched Def Leppard on NHL Rocks on my laptop, chuckled at Joe Elliott turning the Stanley Cup upside down. I’m sure hockey fans were aghast and offended, but hey — what the hell do you expect from a band of British soccer football fans?  The music sounded great, and I saw some familiar faces in the audience.

Aya sang and giggled and chortled and announced several times that she wished she could see Def Leppard in concert.  I think she’s still too small, though.

After I read to Aya and tucked her in, I spent about 45 minutes snuggled up next to her, trying to get her to talk through her fears enough that she could go to sleep.  She talked about how her ‘pa looked really sick and she could tell he was hurting, how it made her cry at first, how the old woman in the wheelchair at the ER looked very old and sick and kept coughing and spitting into a box.  She wanted to know how people could get stones in their kidneys and if it might happen to her.  I told her about my experiences with kidney stones and how they can form.  She laughed when I told her about the laser and seemed reassured when I told her most people don’t ever have problems with kidney stones.  Then she wanted to know what made people throw up.  I offered very brief explanations.  Hopefully she won’t end up as much of an emetophobe as I am.

Didn’t know that about me, did you?

If I went to a casino and gambled and lost, or if I misled those I am obligated to about my financial status and got caught, there would be no government bailout for me.

My experience is limited, but I would be a fool if I believed that any governmental efforts - by the current administration or any future administration - can rebuild the economy.

Also, due to a spate of spam users, I’ve temporarily disabled user registrations.  You don’t have to register to comment, so it’s a mostly a non issue.  If, however, you do want to register on this blog, let me know via comment, email, or IM and I’ll register you.

Anyway, don’t be surprised if the maintenance mode message pops up from time to time over the next several days!

1. What did I learn last week? I learned to not underestimate the power of self-interest and greed, especially when weighed against compassion and concern for one’s fellow human being.
   
2. What was my greatest accomplishment over the past week? Baking three loaves of sheepherder’s bread on Saturday.  It turned out perfect. I don’t think I can tolerate the taste of bagged store-bought bread anymore.
   
3. Which moment from last week was the most memorable and why? The much-needed rain on Friday and Saturday.  The air smelled wonderful for the first time in months.
   
4. What’s the #1 thing I need to accomplish this week? I need to write more.  There are a couple of rants stewing in my mind. (Mel’s “Sorry, my womb just up and wrote this‘” at 2phatgeeks pretty much sums up one of those rants!)
   
5. What can I do right now to make the week less stressful? Avoid people when I’m feeling particularly bitchy.
   
6. What have I struggled with in the past that might also affect the upcoming week? My temper, my disdain for hypocrisy, and my tendency to say exactly what I think.
   
7. What was last week’s biggest time sink? Emnity of the Orcs III. Dear gods.
   
8. Am I carrying any excess baggage into the week that can be dropped? Yeah, but I can’t drop it.
9. What have I been avoiding that needs to get done? Halloween costume for Aya.
   
10. What opportunities are still on the table? What does this question mean, anyway?
    
11. Is there anyone I’ve been meaning to talk to? Yes. Will I? No.
    
12. Is there anyone that deserves a big ‘Thank you’? My twin, for being understanding when I need someone to understand me.
13. How can I help someone else this coming week? Cook tasty food for them.
14. What are my top 3 goals for the next 3 years? 1) Pay off ALL my bills. 2) Get down to a size 6. 3) Finish writing a story - any story.
15. Have any of my recent actions moved me closer to my goals. Yes, No, and Yes.
16. What’s the next step for each goal? 1) Keep doing what I’m doing now. 2) Stomach crunches and more walking on weekends. 3) Write down the crazy ideas I have when I’m half awake.
    
17. What am I looking forward to during the upcoming week? Playing LotRO. Writing.
    
18. What are my fears? Unpredictable abdominal pain.
19. What am I most grateful for? My twin.
    
20. If I knew I only had one week to live, who would I spend my time with? My daughter.