Smoke and Mirrors

Sugasm #152

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 13:05:00 +0000

HNT courtesy of An unassuming girl. The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #153? Submit a link to your best post of the week by emailing me directly at radicalvixenatgmaildotcom Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set. This Week’s Picks Sugarbutch Star: Maze - The Girl in the Red Dress “She’s the kind of girl who brings out the worst in me.” treat or … fuck “He looked like I had just given him a car for Christmas and he gently took my hand and led me upstairs. ” A Life Exposed and Amplified “We were breaking the rules and being dirty.” Mr. Sugasm Himself Sugar Bank Editor’s Choice I told him I loved him. He gave me a pen. More Sugasm Join the Sugasm See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday (Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above within a week. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above...

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Love Our Lurkers

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Tue, 11 Nov 2008 22:59:00 +0000

I was introduced to 'Love Our Lurkers' by GreenWoman and it seems like fun and a really lovely opportunity to get to know the people who enjoy reading our blogs As Bonnie (who started 'Love Our Lurkers' a while back) says - 'While we may not see your face or read your words, we know you're out there. Even in silence, your return visits provide a gentle affirmation' and that counts for all of us who write, so I would like to invite you dear readers to speak up and say hello by leaving a comment below. There's no need for it to be long; Introduce yourself if you like, or you can leave a fake name or no name at all if you value your annonymity. What's important is that you peek out from behind the darkness just far enough that we might see you. Feel free to remark on the content, perhaps to tell me how I might make this blog more interesting, more useful, more attractive, more arousing, or more fun. I love new ideas! Maybe ask a question or just say a simple hello to let us know you...

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Unblemished

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 21:34:00 +0000

For You ... I fall for pain and the force that marks me. I thrill in being tugged sharply, harshly to my senses, but I'm no submissive: I relish the fight, the struggle not to be broken, taking each lash or bite or pinch with a sharp intake of breath and a hot rush of blood through my veins. I like those who are certain they can break me; they try so hard, for so long, leaving scratch upon bruise for my pleasure. My purpled souvenir from last Thursday is virtually faded now, sunk into my skin. No one else can likely see it, but I can hear the hushed vespers of its ghost haunting my skin and sinew. For days afterwards, I fingered your impression. I didn't cover it. I watch it fade slowly, hoping that by the time it had gone, you'd be back around to allow me another. You watch me ... I'll make a point of ruffling my hair off my shoulders, inviting you with the blank canvas of my smooth, long neck, my juicy ass or my soft, tanned back. Nothing is blemished in my blemishes: I find...

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M.I.A.

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 09:52:00 +0000

Wow, so it's been a very long time since I've last written anything on here and I apologise sincerely! To spare those of you who haven't been in contact and so don't know what happened from a long story, I will make my excuses quickly: My blog was attacked by a Christian rights group who somehow were able to make it so that when people went to view my page, they were directed to another page warning them of the evils of sin and damnation and with images of Lot and his family in Gomorrah, amongst other pictures of the fires and demons of Hell! So I contacted kind Blogspot people who tried to sort it out and in doing so pulled down my blog for a long time whilst they fixed it. I have to rush off now, but I will be back this evening with tales of what I have been up to. I hope you are all lovely and well. Lily x

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The First Night

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Fri, 30 May 2008 10:41:00 +0000

I finally have a day where I have no errands, no up-coming recitals to practise for, no work, no hassle, no nothing ... I am going to put my feet up, watch movies and catch up on blogging and eat ice-cream. So this post is going back to the beginning to start with my very first client, an entire month ago ... I had written a post here about my first booking which unfortunately didn't come to fruition, and after a while of reading silence from my inbox, I was feeling slightly apprehensive that maybe I was going about doing something the wrong way, or perhaps the blogging wasn't acceptable to those who knew about it, or any number of things. But later, in the first week or so of april, I had an enquiry by a gentleman from France, who was coming to London on business. We spoke by email and on the phone and got on so well that by the time I met with him, it was as though I was meeting up for dinner with an old friend! I was very surprised that my first rendezvous would be so much more...

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Sugasm #132

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Wed, 21 May 2008 11:11:00 +0000

Bali Hai-HNT courtesy of Blue-eyed Vixen. The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #133? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set. This Week’s Picks Fuck The Pope.“The Church would have you believe that abstinence should be sufficient.” Good Boy“Despite my outward appearance, I still felt sexy as hell knowing what was underneath those misleading garments.” May Masturbation Challenge: Progress Report day 10“At the Dee & Apollo household, it’s early on Day 10 of the May Masturbation Challenge. ” Mr. Sugasm Himself (one from the vaults)The US Constitution Erotic Coloring Book Editor’s ChoiceUK Criminal Justice Bill Clause 63 - but what is “extreme”? - A Beginners Guide More SugasmJoin the Sugasm See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

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Art Personified

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Fri, 09 May 2008 13:19:00 +0000

I have been so busy this whole month and I’m having trouble getting out the posts that I want to. But today I was watching Miami Ink and it reminded me how much I have been wanting a tattoo for the last couple of years ~ I wanted to share that with you. I have always wanted something that was an expression of myself, but I wouldn't want anything that could get in the way of my life or stop me reaching goals because of how people might judge me. Nothing is going to stop me doing something I want to do though, and myself, I wouldn't want anything that is intrusive on my body, just a piece of art that is personal to me. I never used to be that into tattoos, I'm not terribly keen on full sleeve works or whole body pieces, but then again, I have seen 2 or 3 that took my breath away by their beauty ~ I do like works of art, and often that is what tattoos are ... when I started seeing tattoos that looked like that, I realised that they don't have to be brash, agressive marks and that for...

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Music Therapy

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Thu, 01 May 2008 01:33:00 +0000

My piano teacher today told me that I am too tense. In my shoulders, my back, my arms; my whole body has tensed up and it is affecting my playing. She asked if I am stressed about anything and I explained that I feel pressure when preparing pieces for a performance, but this is not really entirely true - I just didn't have a solid reason to give her ... So what am I tense about? The fact that I am on edge everytime I hear that my irresposible, irrational, highly volatile little sister has gone out driving in a temper now that she's passed her test? That each time my parents draw one fight closer to finally separating they call me up to martial me into taking one of their sides, when they know I refuse to get involved? The unfortunate fact that my recent move to live closer to my family for the first time in my life is actually more difficult than never seeing them at all?! No, I think in truth, the reason for my tension is that I feel, since moving to the UK, that my life has...

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Apologies

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 11:07:00 +0000

I really am sorry about the incredible lack of posts over the last couple of weeks - I have been tremendously busy with work and on top of that, there has been a wedding/blessing, 3 birthdays, a golden aniversary and a DMT + trampolining meet. Life has been very hectic! But I am back now and can share with you all the delights of the first few appointments that I have had the past 2 weeks ... I'd like to say thank you to everyone who has emailed me and who have been so friendly and supportive since I started blogging and escorting - both are completely new experiences for me and I was pleasantly surprised at the sense of community and friendship that exist with both, so thank you! Lily x

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Sugasm #125

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 11:02:00 +0000

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #126? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set. All-Nekkid Thursday courtesy of Tara Tainton. This Week’s Picks Filling Myself“We too want, need, conversations in which someone listens to us and considers our needs, not just their own.” Sex Worker Solidarity: Amanda Brooks“There’s a lot of love among activists, even those who disagree with one another.” Need“These images that come from the artistic workings of your inner soul speak to me, as mine do to you.” Mr. Sugasm Himself (one from the vaults) 10 Lies Pornographers Tell Editor’s Choice Though We’ve Never Met More Sugasm Join the Sugasm See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

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Raincheck

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 13:47:00 +0000

I was going to make a post on some ponderings I've had recently about the Devadasi, and I still intend to write it, although probably tomorrow morning now, because I have just sat down to watch 'Desperate Housewives' and suck on some deliciously creamy caramel that I boiled up because ... ... my date for saturday has just postponed. I am disappointed, but by the sounds of it, so is he. Such is life. He has been called upon to entertain business colleagues who are down in London for a few days, and whilst I cheekily reminded him that I can look just as delightful in an evening dress as out of one, he doesn't think he will be able to behave himself and act professionally with a beautiful girl there to distract him and his little friend! So now I start afresh. Again. And as must be evident from my previous posts, I am not yet clear on how to go about enticing my first clients, as a result of my aforementioned 'Catch 22'esque situation. I'm afraid today's posts haven't been very...

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To Blog, Or Not To Blog?

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 12:35:00 +0000

It was mentioned to Lily in an email regarding her recent post about the new website (shameless plugging, accepted!), that it should contain a link to this blog. Lily had in fact thought about this when she set it up, but something stayed her little hand. Upon receipt of a recent email though, as it was from someone whose opinion Lily respects very much, she wrote a comment in the updates section of her site mentioning this blog, with a link attatched. Since doing so, Lily has again had her doubts ... what if potential clients are put off by the fact that Lily airs her escorting experiences and views on sex for anyone to read?! She is, after all, only starting out and the possibility of having no clients is one that would of course have a deblitating effect on her career as an escort! Even without mentioning her clients, incidents that Lily describes in her blog may be recognised by them or, even worse, their friends/family, although considering how many people her blog reaches,...

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On Becoming an Escort

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 11:27:00 +0000

Lily has already briefly mentioned her ideas about marketing and some thoughts on business cards, but even before responses were received, she had realised that they are not in any way a good idea ... lets put it down to first week jitters! But now that the website is up and running (albeit without photos yet, but we will simply gloss over that issue for the moment) she has started to consider the commercial components or her chosen path more carefully. As she's sure her readers have noticed by now, marketing is not an area in which Lily has much experience ... when writing articles for newspapers or submitting poetry for publication, there is not much action that needs to be taken in order to promote yourself ~ you let your creative talents do the work for you. Advertising in the industry seems to pose quite a challenge for those who don't wish to compete with the 34DD breasts which are filling up the space in the ad slot next to yours. Not that Lily is implying that there is...

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Step Back, Step Forward

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 23:43:00 +0000

Lily's poor graphic designer friend has gone and contracted glandular fever, so will not be able to work on her website for quite a while. Whilst Lily is of course concerned for his health, sweet soul that he is, this poses the dilemma that she is without any page for longer than she would like. Today she hurriedly span through the labyrinthine pathways of the internet ... and stumbled accross a little gem ... an entirely free webspage hosting site, exclusively tailored to escorts. Can this be true? she wondered to herself as she registered slightly apprehensively, only to be prompted to choose her very own, personal domain name. She couldn't believe her luck and decided on the one which seemed to suit her best ~ rare-courtesan.com. After hours of entering content and playing with the templates and options, the result is a temporary website which, I am sure you will all agree, is much more appealing than the generic myspace page that Lily had to start out with! She even gets...

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Why Oh Why?

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 22:57:00 +0000

Lily didn't realise it would happen so soon, but she has been expecting it ... That someone, at some point, would take it upon themselves to make life unpleasant for her in some way, believing that the fact Lily takes money for sex allows them to try to manipulate her as they like, because they see her as a worthless, money-hungry whore. First it was an email from a guy who said he liked Lily's ad, could he make an appointment? But after a little while, he had decided her rates were too expensive. Fine - Lily is not for everybody. Polite end of conversation. Later he writes again to demand she sends a picture of her face and phone number. Lily ignores it. What ensues is a barrage of messages asking why she would expect anyone to pay her rates without ever having met them or seen them properly first when there are thousands of other girls he can shag for same money and what is so special about Lily?! That Lily is a bad businesswoman not to engage with him as she would have...

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Rolling Balls

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 20:41:00 +0000

So after much deliberation, perhaps more than neccesary, as to which I should choose, I have placed my profile with an escorting website and have already made my first booking ... ... for Saturday, in case anybody was interested(!). Responses have been surprisingly polite and mostly genuine, with fewer timewasters than I anticipated! I don't think I will keep my ad there very long, as it is not really how I want to go about things, but until I get started, it will suffice. Now all that remains is for me to complete the last week of my current job and make sure I am prepared for anything and everything - Now is where it really starts ... I'll keep you posted on how it all unfolds, if you wish to follow my story. For the moment, I am just excited and apprehensive. Lily x

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A Long Awaited Meeting

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Sat, 22 Mar 2008 18:46:00 +0000

She stepped from the train, glancing calmly behind to see if you stood on the platform, she didn’t know where to expect you. As she walked towards the stairs she looked up while negotiating the steps in her stilettos – your favourites, high, black with gold trim and gilt metal doves on the sides – and saw you stood there, your old coat turned up against the expected chill, chocolate eyes turned towards her in anticipation. She waved a shy greeting and continued down, heart fluttering just at your presence. ‘You look beautiful’ ‘Thank you,’ ‘I should have made an effort - you’ve made feel scruffy now’ ‘No, I like it when you don’t shave’ Never had she told you how she prefers the days when you show up to work with a dark shadow outlining your sharp jaw line, contrasting with your smooth latte skin and transforming your laughing eyes into deep pools of intensity. Then with a second glance she realises you meant the simple white t-shirt and cargos you’ve thrown on, an escape from the...

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Sweet Sigh

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Sat, 22 Mar 2008 09:55:00 +0000

I feel every piece of music I hear, every note I play, every beat that pulses through the air, I feel every layer. A piece of music can make me laugh out with pure, anadulterated joy or bring tears to my eyes at the pain it invokes ... music is my everything. Whilst playing Chopin's 'Sospiro' this morning, I suddenly realised how it is the musical incarnation of an orgasm. Not those sudden explosions of passion, but the ones that creep up on you in slow intense waves, radiating softly out from your core until they reach your toes, causing them to curl and flex and you feel that the pleasure is too much for you to bear, that all you are is writhing at the mercy of this pulsating nub at the centre of your body ... when it realeases you it is not once, but in convulsion after sweet shuddering convulsion, over and over, every nerve ending burning, on fire, ripple after ripple of molten heat, engulfing your body in it's relentless embrace until it finally allows your skin to cool down,...

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What To Do ... ?

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 10:52:00 +0000

As Lily stood in the shower this morning, letting the scalding water stream over her neck and shoulders to run in swift rivulets around breasts and nipples, down to a little bellybutton where it swirled gracefully before flowing away under her feet, she contemplated her business plan ... ... and wasn't at all surprised to realise that she doesn't have one. Because that has always been her way - doing before thinking. Lily has a high regard for the primacy and validity of human passions and its role on man’s life and I suppose this reflects itself in her highly impulsive nature. So the website is in the capable hands of her graphic designer friend who is "constructing" it out of complex formulae and a language of codes which Lily has no hope of ever understanding, a photo-shoot session has been booked for after Easter with an acquaintance at London School of Fashion whose graduation project is, fortuitously, on tasteful artistic nudes, and rates have been decided upon, after much...

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Time Out ... To Explore

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Sat, 15 Mar 2008 11:14:00 +0000

I would like to share with you some of the timid treats that, 'quelle surprise!' an incredibly coincidental issue of Time Out Magazine has provided us with this month ... I first discovered their array of delights when I followed on a link on another webpage about how to lead a double life when you have your own secret hidden world. But I didn't finish the article as my sight was soon attracted to a far more interesting link at the side on double penetration - ooooh delights! we meet a first timer! We also have an introduction to 'splosh' (for those of you more versed in these types of shenanigans ... have you seen the Splosh Website recently?!) There's also a woman who tells of when she wanted to try out a fucking machine and many more people chronicling their fetishes and new experiences. Just a little reminder that we should all try new things every once in a while, branch out of our comfort zones and test out our tastebuds! I haven't read all of the articles, and a lot of them...

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Flitting About

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 20:44:00 +0000

I was surprised to find, on reading my favourite blogs this lunchtime, that Ex-Courtesan Gillette had written an eloquently insightful post about what monogamy means to her, because in the dark hours of thursday night exacly the same strands of thought were wisping though my sleep clouded mind ... Whilst lazing in bed and grazing on grapes and shortbread of an evening, as one does(!), I had a call from a good friend of mine, who in fact I haven't actually known for that long. We engage in a lot of indepth conversations and tend to share similar views on many a provocative topic. Especially alike are our ideas about how to conduct relationships with men. Last night was no different, and after a while the talk moved to her current despair at the male population (which is understandable as she recently suffered an unexpected betrayal). To support a particuclar point she was making, my friend asked, with the intention of a rhetorical question as she was sue I would agree, to pretend for...

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Enchanté

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Fri, 14 Mar 2008 12:15:00 +0000

As a newcomer to these parts, allow me to enlighten you a little about myself ... I am 22, 5'9", 32B, size 8-10 (UK). I am the mixed race daughter of 2 entirely disparate cultures - tribal Africa and conservative Anglo-Saxon, thus my luscious locks are dark and curly, framing eyes of big bright blue. This in itself is a clue that I have managed to create a life for myself in which their contrasting elements tentatively balance and somehow fuse to allow two different worlds to gracefully co-exist. With my family I flitted from sea to sea and so have never lived anywhere for longer than 3 years. But on my travels through citadels as far and wide as Morocco, Jordan and India to Malaysia, Australia, Zambia and Botswana I have encountered an array of colourful characters without whose influences I would not be the person I am today. Like I said, I have spent the most part of my life travelling. I have been told I am a perpetual aesthete, though it is true that I take pleasure in all...

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Musings

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Thu, 13 Mar 2008 20:30:00 +0000

I think that at heart, and of course to varying degrees, there are some people who are naturally 'feminists' and some who aren't. One can alter and amend one's morals and beliefs to adhere to a philosophy that you have decided makes sense to your life, but peoples' instinctual perspectives will always and inescapably veer towards one plane or another. I guess you explain it like food: I love vegetables. Cabbage, green beans, lettuce, sundried tomatoes, eggplant, zucchini, cucumber, leeks ... I’ll eat them all. Except mushrooms - these I despise above anything else. I have no valid reason for this feeling of utmost disgust towards a plant that has never done anything wrong to me and in fact adds a quite delectable flavour to stews and stroganoffs, but I cannot put them in my mouth. It is not a matter of personal choice, but of natural predisposition and no matter what anyone has tried, I am unable to like mushrooms. I can tell people I do and I can eat foods that contain them, but...

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Lily Cordially Invites You ...

noreply@blogger.com (Lily Valentina) — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 15:38:00 +0000

I was never a normal child. Even my mother always told me that, but she didn't need to; I knew it for myself. I took the clothes off all my Barbies and wrapped her in lace instead and hated watching Scooby-Doo. I read Albert Camus, Jules Verne, Marquis de Sade, Sati and Ursula Le Guin and understood the socio-political nuances in each. Whilst my friends shopped for sweets and puzzles, I lusted after silk stockings, vintage jewelled hatpins and delicate underwear. I wore subtle eyeliner and tinted lip balm in place of the usual glittery eyeshadows and garish nail polishes. I had a fascination of female sexuality and sex. When I was about 11 the craze in the school playground one summer was marbles. I played it every now and then but failed to be riveted by the rarity index of the different sizes and throwing those pretty little glass balls at walls just didn't do it for me. Instead, I put a few up inside of me in the shower one morning and wandered around all day amazed at the feeling...

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