TAM Airlines

Latin America’s largest airline headquartered in Sao Paolo, Brazil. If you live in North America, South America or Europe, you get the chance to experience the Brazilian airline’s hospitality when you fly with them. The stewardesses are dressed formal and elegant, especially the red trimmings adorning their royal blue uniforms along with their heels too.

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Norwegian Air Shuttle

The second largest airline in Scandinavia with flight attendants who are professional, friendly, informative and always smiling.

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Air France

Ahh… France.. where all the greatest designers come from. As a matter of fact, Air France’s flight attendant uniforms are created by none other than the one and only, Christian Lacroix. He wanted to go beyond designing a uniform to create an entire wardrobe with Air France: some one hundred individual items that can be combined in a multitude of ways, allowing each person to develop a distinctive wardrobe to suit his or her personality, morphology, culture and profession. The female employees have the most choices which include summer dresses, winter dresses, skirts, trousers, short jacket, long jackets, pull-over tops, button down tops, assorted belts, scarves, shoes, boots, etc. The rules of what pieces can be worn together is even more confusing.

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British Airways

Julien McDonald’s British Airways uniform looks stylish, modern and is made out of high quality materials. Although to a certain extent, one may also say that the uniform has no discernible identity so it could actually be representing any number of airlines. Well, maybe it’s intentional.

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Cebu Pacific

In late 2010, Cebu Pacific’s dancing flight attendants became a sensation after a YouTube video taken of them doing a dance number to Lady Gaga’s Just Dance and Katy Perry’s California Gurls went viral. The only gripe about Cebu Pacific is the mechanical ways that things are being done, like how announcements are all automated.

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TAP Portugal

The uniform colour of bright green and striking red blend very well together, giving the flight attendants a fresh, provocative look. However, there have been feedback by passengers who frequently met not-so-friendly TAP cabin crews.

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Virgin Atlantic

One of the sexiest in terms of costume design. Striking red, form fitting dress with skirt lines above the knee with a purple fade to white scarf to match. Although Virgin Atlantic flight attendants were voted the best looking by 1000 Britons in a recent poll by the Business Meeting and Travel Show, the scope of the survey was actually too narrow to come to a conclusion to say that Virgin Atlantic has the best looking cabin crews. Maybe among the 1000 Britons, yes, but definitely not the world over.

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Eva Air

The flight attendants with their matching green outfits look really nice, and will usually speak to you in Taiwanese when serving you meals and refreshments (if you look like a typical Chinese). Most of their English is not bad either and you definitely won’t have a problem communicating with them. Also, you will find most of the time the cabin crew consist of all women under the age of 30, at least 5’7 in height with hair buns tucked to perfection and they all have fair complexions with porcelain skin tones. Cool thing is, Eva Air’s cabin crew passes out hand wipes to all passengers before each meal.

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JAL

Japan Airlines flight attendants treat you like royalty. Like most quality airlines, hot towels are given to wipe your hands prior to any meal or snack, unlimited beverages, spirits, beer, and wine, and fun Japanese snacks and beverages left in bins for you to pick as you please, all supplied at the back of the aircraft. Just imagine your experience with JAL is simply a direct result of Japanese culture that is inviting, respectful, and hard working.

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Angela Lambert

Pornography is literature designed to be read with one hand.

Anonymous

A promiscuous person is a person who is getting more sex than you are.

Anticipation makes the hard-on longer.

I’m not a bad girl I’m just a good girl that does bad things!

I have learned that love can grow without sex, and that sex does not always lead to love.

It isn’t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married.

Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken.

Sex is like air; it’s not important unless you aren’t getting any.

Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range.

Sex is like snow, you never know how many inches you’re going to get or how long it will last

Sex is more than an act of pleasure, its’ the ability to be able to feel so close to a person, so connected, so comfortable that it’s almost breathtaking to the point you feel you can’t take it. And at this moment you’re a part of them.

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the answer.

Sex is simple, love stings afterwards.

The difference between light and hard is that you can sleep with a light on.

Two word’s guys hate “don’t” and “stop” unless you put them together!

What you see is what you get so make your move. You won’t regret!

When a guy goes to a hooker, he’s not paying her for sex, he’s paying her to leave.

When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $3.95 a minute.

Barbara Cartland

Among men, sex sometimes results in intimacy; among women, intimacy sometimes results in sex.

Bertrand Russell

Civilized people cannot fully satisfy their sexual instinct without love.

Billy Crystal

Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place.

Chinese Proverb

It is not economical to go to bed early to save the candles if the result is twins.

David Lodge

Literature is mostly about having sex and not much about having children; life is the other way around.

Don Schrader

To hear many religious people talk, one would think God created the torso, head, legs and arms, but the devil slapped on the genitals.

Edwin Chapin

The trouble with resisting temptation is that you may not get another chance.

Frederike Ryder

When a man goes on a date, he wonders if he is going to get lucky. A woman already knows.

Isabel Allende

For women the best aphrodisiacs are words. The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time.

Les Dawson

My wife is a sex object – every time I ask for sex, she objects.

Mae West

Sex is an emotion in motion.

Margaret Atwood

Nobody dies from lack of sex. It’s lack of love we die from.

Rita Rudner

Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?

Robin Williams

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.

Rodney Dangerfield

Bisexuality doubles your chances of a date on a Saturday night.

Sophia Loren

Sex appeal is fifty percent what you’ve got and fifty percent what people think you’ve got.

Steve Dublanica

Seduction is enticing someone into doing what they secretly want to do already.

Steve Martin

You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither.

Woody Allen

Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer sex raises some pretty good questions.

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.

Air Canada

No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline : North America.

Executive First is Air Canada’s international business class product, updated during the carrier’s Project XM upgrade. These cabins are available on nearly all widebody aircraft.

Executive First feature electronic flat beds, in a 1–1–1 or 1–2–1 herringbone configuration with a 21-inch seat width and a 6-foot-3-inch seat pitch. The configuration is similar in layout to Virgin Atlantic’s Upper Class Suite and Air New Zealand’s Business Premier Class. Entertainment is personal AVOD (Audio Video On Demand), while music is provided by XM Satellite Radio. Self-service bar areas and mood lighting are available on all B777-300ER and B777-200LR aircraft.

Return flights, Toronto to London cost about USD 4300 on Air Canada’s Executive First class as of 2011.

Air New Zealand

No.7 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline.
No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline : Australia/Pacific.

Business Premier is the highest available class on Air New Zealand flights. The seating is configured in a herringbone layout in a 1-2-1 configuration, allowing direct access for every passenger to an aisle. Each seat is 22 inches wide leather and comes with an ottoman footrest that doubles as a visitor seat. The seat converts to a full length lie-flat bed, for which a pillow, duvet and sheet are provided.

Each seat comes with a large tray table, multiple stowage bins, a cocktail tray, a bottle holder, in-seat power, three reading lights, and an AVOD system with a 10.4-inch monitor. On the 777-300ER, each seat also has USB and iPod connectivity, and a larger 12.1-inch touchscreen monitor.

Return flights, Auckland to London cost about USD 8300 on Air New Zealand’s Business Premier as of 2011.

ANA

No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline Ground Services.
No.2 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Transpacific Airline.

Return flights, Tokyo to London cost from about USD 14,000 on ANA’s Business Class as of 2011.

Introduced in 2009, the “Inspiration of Japan” cabin features included fully-lie-flat-bed business class seats (the first for a Japanese airline), a nearly enclosed first class suite seats, a new AVOD in-flight entertainment system (based on Panasonic Avionics Corporation’s eX2 technology with iPod connectivity, in-seat shopping and meal ordering as well as premium cabin touchscreen consoles) as well as improvements to its in-flight service.

Since February 2010 ANA offers women’s only lavatories on international flights.

Return flights, Tokyo to London cost from about USD 32,000 on ANA’s First Class as of 2011.

Asiana

No.3 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline.
No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline Cabin Staff.
No.3 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline Ground Services.
No.2 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline : Asia.

The space between seats in business class is 58 inches, and they are elongated to 165 degrees. The size of personal LCD monitors is 15.4 inches diagonally, slightly larger than the previous 15 inches. The audio and video on demand (AVOD) system of the in-flight entertainment program has also been upgraded, with better resolution and faster speed.

Return flight, Seoul to Los Angeles cost from about USD 5800 on Asiana’s Business Class as of 2011.

Return flight, Seoul to Los Angeles cost from about USD 8400 on Asiana’s First Class as of 2011.

British Airways

No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Business Class Airline Lounge.

Club World is the long-haul business class product on British Airways 767, 777 and 747 aircraft, and the only class on its two Airbus A318 aircraft. Passengers have access to departure lounges at most airports and an exclusive arrivals lounge at London Heathrow Terminal 5. The Club World cabin provides a 20 in wide, 6 ft long fully flat bed. There are 24 old generation Club World seats fitted on Boeing 767-300ER aircraft but these aircraft will be replaced by the Boeing 787 which will feature the Next-Generation Club World cabin from 2012 onwards.

Return flights, London to Singapore cost from about USD 5000 on British Airway’s Club World as of 2011.

First is the long-haul first class service on British Airways and is offered only on Boeing 747 and Boeing 777 aircraft. There are 14 private “demi-cabins” per aircraft, each with a 6 ft 6 in bed, a 15 inch wide in-flight entertainment screen, in-seat power for laptops and personal phones. Menus are upgraded from Club World, and offer greater choice and quality.

Return flights, London to Singapore cost from about USD 8200 on British Airway’s First Class as of 2011.

Cathay Pacific

No.4 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline.
No.3 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline Inflight Entertainment.
No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Transpacific Airline.
No.3 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best First Class Airline.
No.3 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Business Class Airline Lounge.
No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best First Class Airline Seat.
No.3 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline : Asia.

After receiving extensive criticism for its high-walled herring-bone configuration business class seating on long-haul flights, which many passengers felt was too narrow and confined, Cathay Pacific embarked on a total redesign of business class seating. The new design is more conventional, emphasizing the passenger’s sense of personal space while also retaining privacy.

The new business class seats will be fitted into all new Airbus A330-300 and Boeing 777-300ER deliveries, with existing A330-300 and 777-300ER aircraft to be upgraded to the new seating and cabin by February 2013. However,the current Boeing 747-400 and Airbus A340 aircraft will not be upgraded to the new seating and cabin due to the impending retirement of those planes.

Return flights, Hong Kong to London cost from about USD 5900 on Cathay Pacific’s Business Class as of 2011.

The New First Class seats can be converted into a fully lie-flat bed measuring 36 × 81 in. The new seats include a massage function, a personal closet, an ottoman for stowage or guest seating, and an adjustable 17 in 16:9 PTV.

Return flights, Hong Kong to London cost from about USD 9700 on Cathay Pacific’s First Class as of 2011.

Continental Airlines

No.2 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Transatlantic Airline.
No.2 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline : North America.

The new BusinessFirst seats have a six-way adjustable head rest, an individual overhead reading light and an adjustable seat light allowing customers to read in bed without disturbing their neighbor and a privacy shell that allows for seclusion from other travelers. BusinessFirst customers also receive one of the highest crew to passenger ratios (1:8) among all international business class products.

The new BusinessFirst seats are featured on all of Continental’s Boeing 777s and Boeing 757-200′s. Installation on the Boeing 767 fleet will follow in 2011. The anticipated completion of the roll-out across Continental’s entire international fleet is August 2012. In addition, all 787 deliveries will have the seats installed.

Continental considers BusinessFirst to be its signature onboard product, and the service is a frequent subject of advertising campaigns. Customers seated in the BusinessFirst cabin on longhaul flights from the United States to Europe, Asia, select cities in South America, and the Middle East receive special ground services, including EliteAccess priority bag service at check-in, expedited security screening (where available), access to Continental’s Presidents Club or affiliated Star Alliance lounges, personalized Continental Concierge service, and dedicated boarding procedures.

Entertainment is offered at each individual seat, and passengers on Boeing 777 and 757 aircraft have access to a new Audio-Video On Demand system with touch-screen controls. Customers also are provided headphones, a large pillow, wool blanket, and amenity kit prior to departure. Upon arrival, BusinessFirst customers have access to shower facilities and arrival lounges at most airports.

Return flights, New Jersey to London cost from about USD 3200 on Continental Airline’s BusinessFirst as of 2011.

Delta Air Lines

No.3 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline : North America.

Designed by Thompson Aero Seating and manufactured by Contour Aerospace Limited, these sleeper suites (Vantage) use a space-saving design, with the bottom ends of the seats extending under the armrests of the suites in front when in the full horizontal flat bed position. This allows for minimal reduction in capacity compared to most other sleeper suite products, particularly with the 767′s narrower fuselage. The suites will be arranged in a 1-2-1 layout, with a total capacity of 40 BusinessElite suites.

Return flights, New York to London cost from about USD 3200 on Delta Airline’s BusinesElite as of 2011.

Emirates

No.10 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline.
No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline Inflight Entertainment.
No.3 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline : Middle East.

Business class on Boeing 777-200LRs, Boeing 777-300s and 29 of 39 3-class Boeing 777-300ERs as well as 5 of 14 2-class 777-300ERs feature seats with a 60 in pitch that recline to 79 in long, angled lie-flat beds. Amenities include massage function, privacy partition, winged headrest with six-way movement, two individual reading lights and an overhead light per seat, in-seat power supply, USB Ports and an RCA socket for laptop connection, over 600 channels of entertainment on ICE, shown on a 17 in wide TV screen.

On Airbus A380-800 aircraft, the seats recline to form a fully flat bed and are equipped with personal mini-bars. Business class passengers also have access to an on-board bar at the rear of the aircraft. Business class passengers have the ability to customize and save seat and in-flight entertainment settings to a memory key for re-use on future flights.

Return flights, Dubai to London cost from about USD 3600 on Emirates’s Business Class as of 2011.

The full suite options comes complete with closing doors to ensure privacy, a mini-bar, a coat rack and storage. They also feature the ICE system on a 23 in LCD screen. The seat converts into a 6 ft 7 in fully flat bed. Private suites are available on all A380-800, A340-500, Boeing 777-200LR aircraft, as well as 27 of 39 3-class Boeing 777-300ER aircraft.

On its newly delivered A380-800, first class features private suites, two shower-equipped lavatories and spa, and access to the first/business class bar area and lounge. Premium class seating is located on the entire upper deck of A380-800 aircraft.

Return flights, Dubai to London cost from about USD 8100 on Emirates’s First Class Suite as of 2011.

Etihad

No.6 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline.
No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best First Class Airline.
No.3 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Business Class Airline.
No.1 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best First Class Airline Catering.
No.2 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best First Class Airline Seat.
No.2 of Skytrax 2011 World’s Best Airline : Middle East.

Business class is known as the Pearl Zone. The Pearl Business Class seats recline to 180 degrees into a fully flat 6’1″ business bed. It has an 88″ pitch and direct access to the aisle for plenty space and privacy. Each self-contained seat is equipped with individual lighting and a reading light. The Pearl Business seats each has a 15″ personal LCD screen. In-flight telephone service is also offered from inside the aircraft. There is also a built-in massage facility.

Return flights, Abu Dhabu to London cost from about USD 3800 on Etihad’s Pearl Business Class as of 2011.

First class is known as the Diamond Zone. The Diamond First Class Suites have seats that rotate 180 degrees and recline into 6’8″ flat beds. Each Diamond Suite has a privacy shell that ensures maximum privacy and direct access to the aisles; within this space there are a coatroom, a mini-bar, a fold-and-swivel meal table, an integrated personal mirror, a magazine rack, a reading light and a desk lamp. Each Diamond seat has pneumatic lumbar support, a six-way movement headrest and a built-in massage facility. Each Diamond Suite has a 23″ personal LCD. The Diamond First Class Zone will be changed throughout the long-haul fleet with new suites and changed toilets.

Return flights, Abu Dhabu to London cost from about USD 8100 on Etihad’s Diamond First Class as of 2011.

Iberia

Iberia Business Plus seat which reclines into lie-flat seats within a rigid pod gives you personal space of up to 6 ft 3 in long by 25 in wide. They have a dual adjustable back cushion with a massage function, adjustable head rests and arm rests, and extendable leg rests. A digital system memorizes the passenger’s preferred seat settings. The Business Plus section also features individual touch-screen entertainment and communications systems. Passengers can send SMS and e-mail messages anywhere in the world in under 15 seconds, and speak on an individual satellite telephone.

Return flights, Madrid to New York cost from about USD 3600 on Iberia’s Business Plus as of 2011.

Japan Airlines

The Executive Class Seasons seat reclines to 171 degrees and has a 15.4 inch personal TV screen. The business class cabin also features the “Sky Gallery,” one wall of the cabin shows a a photographic exhibition that will be regularly changed over the year. The first exhibit, in collaboration with Fuji Film, will be a series of photographs of forests in Japan entitled ‘Forest Forever’. The gallery will be located directly opposite a self-service bar counter, where passengers can enjoy snacks and beverages at anytime. Eight JAL Suites and 77 JAL Shell Flat Neo Seat are installed in each Boeing 777-300ER aircraft.

Return flights, Tokyo to London cost from about USD 10,730 on Japan Airline’s Executive Class Seasons as of 2011.

The suitse in JAL First Class are 20% more spacious than the airline’s previous seat in first class and only suites are available in the JAL First Class cabin set in a 1-2-1 configuration. The suite includes a seat upholstered in gray leather which converts into a full-flat bed. In the 180 degrees position, the seat combines with an ottoman located at the opposite end of the compartment to create one of the largest and widest, most comfortable sleeping areas in first class. When the seat is in the upright position, the ottoman can be used as a seat for a guest. The sliding table can be placed between the seat and ottoman. Passengers, seated in the pair of suites who are traveling together can lower privacy partitions located between them. Each suite comes with Bose noise-cancelling headphones and a personal 19-inch personal TV screen and stowage spaces for bags and small items and a laptop power point. Those in the suites can also whatever they like off the menu whenever they would like with choices of Japanese or Western full-course menus. For sleeping a cabin attendant can place a Tempur-Pedic mattress on the seat bed along with a down comforter and a pillow a well as offer special JAL loungewear.

Return flights, Tokyo to London cost from about USD 32,000 on Japan Airline’s First Class Suite as of 2011.

Jet Airways

Premiere class on the Airbus A330-200 and Boeing 777-300ER international fleet has a fully flat bed with AVOD entertainment. Seats are configured in a herringbone pattern (1-2-1 on the Boeing 777-300ER, and 1-1-1 on the Airbus A330-200), with each seat offering direct access to the aisle. Each Première Seat has a 15.4-inch flat screen LCD TV with AVOD. USB ports and in-seat laptop power are provided. All seats are standard recliner business-class seats with a few newer aircraft with electronic recline and massager.

Return flights, Mumbai to London cost from about USD 3600 on Jet Airway’s Premiere Class as of 2011.

First class is available on all Boeing 777-300ER aircraft. All seats convert to a fully flat bed, similar to Singapore Airlines first class seat but much smaller. It was the twenty-second airline in the world to have private suites. All seats in First have a 23-inch widescreen LCD monitor with audio-video on-demand systems (AVOD), BOSE noise cancelling headphones, in seat power supply, and USB ports.

Return flights, Mumbai to London cost from about USD 5800 on Jet Airway’s First Class as of 2011.

Kingfisher

The international Kingfisher First has full flat-bed seats with a 180 degree recline, with a seat pitch of 78 in, and a seat width of 20-24.54 in. Passengers are given Merino wool blankets, a Salvatore Ferragamo toiletry kit, a pyjama to change into, five-course meals and alcoholic beverages. Also available are in-seat massagers, chargers and USB connectors.

Every Kingfisher First seat has a 17 inch widescreen personal television with AVOD touchscreen controls and offers 357 hours of programming content spread over 36 channels, including Hollywood and Bollywood movies along with 16 channels of live TV, so passengers can watch their favorite TV programs live. There is also a collection of interactive games, a jukebox with customizable playlists and Kingfisher Radio. Passengers are given BOSE noise cancellation headphones.

The service on board the Kingfisher First cabins includes a social area comprising a full-fledged bar staffed with a bartender, a break-out seating area just nearby fitted with two couches and bar stools, a full-fledged chef on board the aircraft and any-time dining. A turn-down service includes the conversion of the seat into a fully-flat bed and an air-hostess making the bed when the passenger is ready to sleep.

Both Kingfisher First and Kingfisher classes feature mood lighting on the Airbus A330-200 with light schemes corresponding to the time of day and flight position.

Return flights, Mumbai to London cost from about USD 3600 on Kingfisher’s First as of 2011.

Amsterdam Schiphol Airport (AMS)

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Altough AMS may not be as large or as busy as it’s other European counterparts, it is still a favourite among passengers as there are lots of interesting stuff to do.

Schiphol Plaza, a shopping area right before customs, has more than 25 shopping outlets selling books, chocolates, fashion wear, electronics, etc. What’s more, when you purchase non perishable items, you instantly receive a 2 year global warranty! And in the event you run out of Euros, you can pay with any other major currency! USD, AUD, JPY, etc. And you can still find shops after customs. How cool is that?!

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Also, do check out the Rijksmuseum, a classical and contemporary art museum. Admission is free!

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In 2010, the world’s first airport library opened, providing more than 1,200 books in 29 languages about Holland’s history and culture. You can also download ebooks and music from Dutch artists for free.

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Suggesting you to win back the cost of your holiday is kind of wrong, but hey, who knows, you might make some money at AMS’s Holland Casino. Fun? Yes. Exciting? Yes. But as a friendly reminder, do walk away at once if you’ve lost more than what you’ve allocated. =)

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Get an unlimited day pass for EUR20 at Sheraton Fitness and Spa, which opens 24/7, to access the workout equipment, sauna, massages, beauty treatments, steam room and rainforest showers.

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Panoramaterras is the name given to Schiphol’s specially built rooftop viewing area where you can catch the best views of planes around the airport. Admission is free. This is not the only site as there’s another one at the new Polderbaan runway and also in McDonald’s.

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Did you know that you can also get married in Schiphol?

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Changi International Airport

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If there’s anywhere in the world to get stuck in for hours, this is the one. It has NEVER been below the top 3 of Skytrax’s World Airport Awards ever since 2001.

Free WiFi. The ENTIRE country is covered by Wireless@SG. Register through your device’s web browser and receive a confirmation code through the phone which you can keep for future use.

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Free PCs for use. No laptop? No problem. Get connected to the internet through one of the hundreds of free PC terminals all over the airport.

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An entertainment deck. A dedicated play area that has all the latest games on Xbox 360 and Playstation 3.

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There’s also a dedicated LAN gaming room for those who prefer playing against other travelers. There’s also a music area nearby where you close your eyes and relax in plush seats after selecting the type of music you want played through the inbuilt speakers.

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There’s also a MTV booth where you get to see all the latest music videos and entertainment clips.

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Or, you can watch the latest blockbusters either in Terminal 2′s or 3′s movie theater. Seats are comfortable, the sound system amazing, properly equipped and there’s also popcorn sold for the true movie experience.

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Travelers are welcome to soak in all 6 open garden areas in Changi, each representing a different group of plants namely, cacti, bamboo, heliconia, sunflower, fern and orchid.

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For SGD 14, you can use the swimming pool, showers, hot tubs,spas, gym and all other facilities located in the transit hotel of Terminal 1.

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Take a nap on the specially made for sleeping chairs in the napping area.

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If you have more than 5 hours to spare, do hope on one of the buses in the free ‘Singapore Tour’ where you will be taken for a trip around the island in 2 hours.

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Shopping is also a heaven here. With more than 300 shops selling cheap electronics to designer goods, you’ll be spoiled for choice.

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Dubai International Airport

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Shopping. That’s what Dubai is known for. It is the largest retail outlet in the world with over 15,000 square meters of retail floor space selling cosmetics, jewellery, electronics, alcohol, luxury goods, sports equipment, designer clothing, tobacco products, toys and books. Opened since 1983, the Dubai Duty Free grew in sales from USD20 million in the first year to USD1.1 billion 25 years later in 2008.

Spend time and relax in any of the two well designed open air garden areas.

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There are also games for the young at heart.

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G-Force Health Club is the best place in DXB which has, in addition to a gym (USD13/hour), private shower rooms with towels, toiletries, and hair dryers, separate gender steam rooms, saunas, jacuzzis and a common swimming pool. This place is open 24/7.

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Hong Kong International Airport

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The best airport in the world. HKIA has won Skytrax’s Airport 8 out of 11 times since 2001 beating out Singapore’s Changi and South Korea’s Incheon. As Skytrax’s results are passenger driven, imagine the happiness of 51 million people in 2010 who come from 160 destinations around the world when they arrive at HKIA. Just like what the slogan says, ‘Hong Kong, Asia’s World City’.

Although Hong Kong is a small island with limited land, the government has done a good job in establishing a fantastic public transportation system connecting HKIA to important locations all over the country.

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HKIA is the only airport in the world that has a 360 seats 4D cinema equipped with state of the art 3D projection system supplemented by seven multi sensory special effects providing you a unique experience beyond any normal theater can offer.

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There’s also the highly interactively educational Aviation Discovery Center for you to discover the aviation development of Hong Kong through fun and exciting settings like the themed exhibits, interactive kiosks, cockpit simulator, SkyDeck and best of all, the 4D Motion Ride plane cabin simulator. How cool is that?

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Adjacent to Terminal 2, you’ll find a golf course inspired by the world famous 17th hole at the Tournament Payers Club in Sawgrass, Florida with a special hole called “Island Green”, situated on an island in the middle of an artificial lake.

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Playstation Gateway is HKIA’s very own dedicated gaming area allowing you to play to your heart’s content for free.

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iSports. HKIA’s one of a kind sports simulator for the physically inclined travelers. Types of sports simulation offered include soccer, basketball, golf, boxing, skiing, car racing and shooting.

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Asia Hollywood is an interactive themed entertainment center aimed to provide an entertaining experience of the local film industry through interactive fun. Do check out the D-Blue Screen and CentiStar while you’re there.

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Although HKIA is HUGE, passengers will find that the terminals are built with convenience in mind. You will not miss riding on the super cool Automated People Mover, a driverless people mover system consisting of 3 stations that travels at 62 km/h, cutting traveling times between check-in areas and the departure gates.

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Terminal 1′s Skymart is great for shopping because it operates on a ‘Downtown Pricing Guarantee’, meaning that prices found here will either be equal or lower to those found in the retailers’ own Hong Kong downtown outlets. Items to look out for are make up brands, fragrances, alcohol and tobacco.

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Incheon International Airport

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Won Skytrax’s Best Airport of The Year in 2009 while it has always been in Skytrax’s top 3 airports of the world since 2006. Is one of only 3 airports in the world certified 5 stars by Skytrax and consistently rated as the best airport in the world by Airports Council International since 2005. Here’s why.

Incheon Golf Club is a modern ‘golf town’ that features a 330-yard driving range and an 18-hole putting course conveniently located within the perimeters of the airport.

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The internet facilities area is a must try experience for any traveler to visit as South Korea is the No.1 country in the world in terms of internet speed. There are also fax and photocopying facilities provided in the same area for a small fee.

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The Airstar Terrace located on the 4th floor of the passenger terminal offers the best scenery for checking out airplanes landing and taking off. Gaze at the panoramic views of Incheon International Airport in one of the many relax chairs laid out by the transparent glass walls.

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ICN is the first airport in the world I have ever come across that has an indoor ice skating rink!

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Thrill seekers and fortune hunters from around the world will surely be enticed by Paradise Golden Gate Casino, located within Hyatt Regency Incheon in the International Business Center.

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If you are just transferring through planes in ICN, you get to use the showering room facilities for free!

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Experience 5000 years of Korean culture at the Museum of Korean Culture. Each of the items in the museum is categorized into Royal Culture, Traditional Arts, Printing/Korean Alphabet Heritage and Traditional Music.

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Munich Airport

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Although it is only secondary to Frankfurt Airport in terms of traffic, Munich Airport is the most liked by visitors traveling through Germany. This was proven when MUC won Skytrax’s Best Airport in Europe title consecutively from 2004-2008 and again in 2010.

The Airport Tours must be one of the main reasons that makes MUC so interesting. Spend 50 minutes passing through a 12 kilometer route that covers Terminal 1 and 2, both runways of the airport and the two fire stations. You will see the freight buildings and maintenance hangars, the engine testing facility and the storage tanks while picking up all kinds of information on every aspect of ramp operations.

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Open from 8am to 10pm, passengers should check out the view of the eastern apron and both runways in Munich Airport from the Visitors Terrace. Cool thing is, you enter the terrace through a glass tunnel called Skywalk that slowly rises through the terminal from the 5th floor.

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The Visitor’s Park of MUC is an interesting section of the airport. Here, you will get to learn how airports work through explanations by MUCi the mascot and the 60 seat cinema open from 9am to 5pm. Do step into the cabins and check out the 3 historic aircrafts on display outside the park namely, a Super Constellation, a Douglas DC-3 and a Junkers Ju 52/3m.

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There’s also the family oriented, modern 18 hole mini golf course open to both adults and children.

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Wireless internet can be found throughout the airport, so can wired internet terminals. However, both come at a fee. =(

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Merkurs Spielothek is an entertainment center functioning as a casino and a games arcade.

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Showers are available in 3 places at the airport, so is the vending machine from which you get your towels, shower gels, etc.

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Massage chairs are found all over the airport but if you’re looking for the human touch, there’s Be Relax, a relax center offering massages, facials, waxing, manicures and pedicures. Happy hours from 12pm to 5pm.

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There’s also a special service offered by Munich Airport called the Meet And Assist Service (MAAS). Passengers who have arranged for the service will get trained staffs to accompany them as soon as arriving, throughout the entire time at the airport. You will get help with language translation, personal luggage management and navigating around the airport.

Napcaps are opened, private ‘pods’ that comes with a small couchette, a flat screen TV, desk and internet connection rentable at EUR 15/hour.

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If you are sharp enough, you will find free coffee/tea machines and EUR1.10 ice creams to make your day. =)

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Munich’s Airbrau must be the coolest airport beer garden cum restaurant in the world. Surrounded by an artificial lake, Airbrau is so BIG it can take up to 600 customers at a time! Moreover the food is really, really delicious and so are the fresh beers (Helles, Weissbier and the super strong Aviator). AND they are really cheap. Meals for under EUR10 and half a liter of beer for under EUR3. A real MUST visit for anyone passing by Munich Airport.

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Update 2009.04.16 – Added 35 more super cool and unique toilet signs to the list to make it 92! Hope to hit 100 soon. hehe.

Update 2008.11.13 – Thanks Thanks Tonu Samuel and Dragonbeard! It’s now 61!

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Below are a showcase of how gender is captured in just a few strokes. Enjoy.

1. Lausanne, Switzerland



2. Patong Beach, Thailand



3. Somewhere in Taiwan



4. Somewhere in UAE & Oman





5. FH Augsburg



6. Pamukkale, Turkey



7. Somewhere in Iran



8. Café-Tabac-Brasserie “Le Jeanne d’Arc”, rue Jeanne d’Arc, Paris





9. Frog Pubs, Paris





10. Disney Sea





11. Hungarian Academy of Sciences





12. Somewhere in Paris





13. UrbanAngel, Edinburgh





14. Apple HQ





15. Somewhere in Ghana, Africa





16. Shinjuku bld





17. KLCC Malaysia





18. On the ferry to Jerba





19. Somewhere in New Zealand





20. Somewhere in Australia





21. At the Science Fiction Museum and Hall of Fame





22. Siam Center, Bangkok





23. Desenzano, Italy





24. Toilet Smurfette & Smurf





25. Aum Thong Thai Restaurant, Hove, UK





26. Sheffield Park Cafe, UK





27. Red Roaster Brighton,UK





28. Nou Nou North African Restaurant, Brighton





29. Somewhere in Paris



30. Unisex at Cliff House, San Francisco, California



31. Somewhere in Barcelona, Spain



32. Hotel Roosevelt in Hollywood, CA





33. Petit Palais” museum in Paris



34. Kloschild, Männer, Café in Prag





35. Somewhere in Bangalore





36. Fontainebleau, Archives nationales, France









37. Home Slice Pizza, Austin





38. Somewhere in Atlanta Georgia





39. Magasin Apache, Paris



40. Honolulu Airport





41. Somewhere in Seoul, Korea



42. Université Paris 8 Saint-Denis, France



43. Somewhere in Bremen





44. Seoul Garden Restaurant, NYC





45. Unknown





46. White Dog, Philly





47. HonFest 2006, Baltimore MD



48. Somewhere in Ireland





49. Coyote Eatery, near Batthany Square in Budapest





50. Eggspectation in Montreal, Canada

The reason why anyone would want to be frugal is to spend less than you earn and use the difference to pay off debt, save and invest. Also, frugality is relative. Find out what’s important to you and plan accordingly, but don’t spend money just because it’s there. As is wanting something and needing something. As long as you can live without it, it’s a want.

Being frugal means being sparing, prudently saving and not wasteful. On the other hand, there’s this other word called cheap defined as being stingy or miserly. An example. It’s frugal when you spend $30 on a good quality dress than $10 on one from a discount store that falls apart after a few washings.

Below are 49 frugal habits that you can use in your lives to prepare for the moments that matter.

Home

(If you buy things you don’t need, you’ll soon sell things you need)

1. Always use both sides of computer printer paper if possible.



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2. Replace all your house’s incandescent light bulbs with compact fluorescent light bulbs. It lasts 10 times longer, uses 75% less energy and produces 75% less heat than incandescent bulbs.



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3. Turn off lights, TV, etc. when not in use. Even if it is 5 minutes, it adds up.



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4. Instead of buying new ones, repaint furniture.



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5. Declutter your house every year and give away old but usable items like clothes and books to relief centers, red cross, thrift stores, etc. Not getting money back reminds you to be more careful with what you buy in the future.



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6. Use the non-donatable towels, t-shirts, and other absorbent fabrics in place of paper towels and disposable cloths for wiping up spills, polishing furniture, washing windows and cleaning bathrooms.



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7. Clean mirrors with old newspapers. It works much better than fabrics.



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8. Line dry your laundry if it’s less than 10 pieces of clothing and if there is space to spare in your home. It’s not that hard to take a few minutes to hang them up. You’ll save a lot in electricity, plus your clothes last longer.



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9. Buy tupperware. It lasts forever.



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10. Never throw away a bag before its time. Produce bags for clean stuff. Grocery bags for dog walks. The new style ziplock bags last about a year. Just wash and dry them.



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11. Don’t buy bottled water. Drink home filtered or boiled water from your kitchen.



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12. Soak jam jars in hot soapy water, peel off the labels and reuse them for storing bits and pieces.



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13. Eat homecooked. Not only will you save money, but you will also be healthier. When you cook, you can control the amount of fat and sugar in your meals.



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14. Stock up for the homecooked days of the week. Write up a grocery list and walk through the grocery store to compare the best value for money brands instead.



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Mall

(Don’t save what is left after spending; spend what is left after saving)

15. Meet your friends or date for breakfast or lunch. Dinner is always the most expensive meal if you’re eating out.



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16. Use only PREPAID credit cards. Cut up all other credit cards. The average American household with at least 1 credit card has more than $8,940 in credit card debt.



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17. Shop with cash. Withdraw a certain amount of money that you can afford to spend for the month and spend it until it’s gone.



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18. Don’t shop. Don’t go to the mall or other shopping area or department store to look around and shop. Go to a store if you know what you need, and then get out. Many times people go shopping, with a vague idea of what they want, and get caught up buying much more.



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19. Watch movies on movie day when tickets are cheapest. That’s about $5 a day, and assuming moderate 52 weeks of doing so, that’s another $260 in your pocket. I’d use it for a nice bottle of wine, dinner at a good restaurant and buy those gorgeous shoes flat out in cash.



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20. Watch only movies rated “Fresh” in rotten tomatoes or above 7/10 in imdb. Download the rest.



21. Make your own popcorn, caramel coat ‘em poppers as much as you want, put it into a brown paper bag, and take it to the cinema.



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22. Always ask “Is this the best price you can give me?” once before paying to places you are a regular to like the mechanic, clothes boutique, hair salon, etc.



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23. And if the price is too high, bargain it down. $15 too much for a vacuum cleaner? Throw in that electric screwdriver for an even twenty.



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24. Try making it a habit to only buy quality clothes that are on sale or clearance.



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25. If you know that a birthday is coming up, you can buy a gift on sale instead of spending more at the last minute.



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26. Coupons work well for brand-name shoppers who use them consistently, but you can save by purchasing store brands, too.



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Travel

(Beware of little expenses; A small leak can sink a large ship)

27. If you live in a developed city, try using public transportation.



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28. If you have a cruise control and there isn’t a whole lot of traffic, use it. It keeps the speed constant and you don’t have to accelerate.



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29. Refuel your car either early in the mornings or late in the evening. Early as in before 9am and late as in after 9pm. The reason lies in petrol becoming denser at lower temperatures. The pumps measure the volume of fuel that you pump, not the actual density and as a result you get better petrol price economy.



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30. We all deserve a get-a-way every once in a while. Making careful planning ahead always helps reduce cost and it’s also less stressful. You get cheaper rates for flights and hotels when booking ahead.



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31. If you love traveling like I do, try to stay with friends or relatives. If you wanna make new ones and learn other cultures, I highly recommend registering for this super duper cool site.



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32. Consider train travel.



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33. Shop around for car rental rates if it is more convenient and efficient than public transport.



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Personal

(The borrower becomes the lender’s slave)

34. Practice preventive maintenance. Get your health, dental checkups regularly. Service your car regularly. Keep your house gutters clean. You will head off any possible minor problems before they become expensive problems. Create a maintenance checklist that you can attach to the item. For important things like your car’s oil changes or tune-ups, put them where you can see them.



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35. Keep track of your cashflow. I highly recommend Wesabe.



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36. Alternate your smoking habit. For example, if you smoke after every meal, skip breakfast, do lunch, skip dinner. Best of all, quit smoking. Savings go by the thousands each year if you stop. Here are 11 steps you can get started on.



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37. Plan your family carefully. Use a condom at all times. It’s a 50 cent solution to not have more kids than you can afford and ensuring your family a better quality of life.



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38. You don’t need to spend $100 on your hair when you can dye it at home for $10.



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39. Switch to a cheaper mobile phone plan that suits your needs.



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40. Frock exchange. This is more for the fashion+cost conscious ladies. Exchange your clothes with your friends. Keep things fresh.



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41. Keep on trying till you find a hairstylist that suits your style that charges reasonably. It’s even better if you are comfortable cutting your own hair.



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42. With the wealth of information and entertainment online, do you really need magazine subscriptions? With all the news online, do you really need a newspaper subscription?



43. Use Skype for long distance conversations. Or any other IM that has video chat functionality.



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44. Don’t buy a new one, if the old one is still running fine. I still don’t have an iPhone because my Motorola v3i works just fine.



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45. If you can complete your errands by walking, walk. It’s like killing 2 birds with a stone.



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46. If the gym fees are reasonable and it motivates you to work out then by all means carry on. If not, you can always jog around your housing area, swim if you live in an apartment with a pool or near a beach. You can even make use of the stairway!



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47. The only loans that you should keep is a mortgage and a partial car loan, although you should try to avoid the last one by just having enough savings. Pay the car loan off asap. Never forget that the only reason loans and credit exist is that the providers expect to make money. Your money.



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48. Stop online impulse buys. Realize that online buying can be way too easy (you don’t even have to go to a store) and therefore, we make too many impulse buys. Buy online if you really need something and it’ll save you money, but beware the impulse buy.



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49. Pay your bills on time. Even if you only pay a bill a few days late, your account may have already received a late fee.



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A pet is an animal that is very beneficial to its owner. There’s even now a type of treatment called pet therapy. I myself have a pet dog and since having it, many things in my household have changed for the better. Below are 3 things why owning a pet will positively affect your life.

Firstly, a pet like any other animal needs to eat and shit. They have a daily schedule that needs to be attended to. Like for example, my pet dog eats 2 meals a day, once in the morning and once in the night. He gets his shower on Saturdays. So, caring for a pet actually encourages nurturance, responsibility and adherence to a daily schedule. This is especially a solid reason for you to convince your parent to get that pet you’ve been wanting.

Secondly, pets improve a person’s mood. No matter how angry, sad or stressed out you may be, spending time with your pet will put your focus and attention on it. There are actually 2 things that can suddenly improve your mood. One is a pet and the other is a baby. In this case, adopting a pet is easily more attainable than a baby.

Lastly, the third reason why you should own a pet is for accompaniment. This is especially beneficial to the elderly. Pets make you feel accepted every time. For example, my pet dog is usually left hanging around alone in the compound of my house. Even if you leave him alone the whole day, he will still come and lick me whenever I’m around. If that’s not love, then I don’t know what is. Pets are also good listeners. Sharing your burden with it helps to alleviate your mind and put you at peace.

Below is a list of the top 10 pets that are adoptable. If you are still petless, you may want to consider adopting one of the below.

Dogs



The man’s best friend is a highly social animal. They are trainable and playful at the same time. The loyalty and devotion that dogs demonstrate as part of their natural instincts as pack animals closely mimics the human idea of love and friendship which leads many dog owners to view their pets as full-fledged family members. The eagerness to please and worshiping their owners in return for a little food and attention alone is enough be included as a family member.

Cats



Cats are vain, fastidious and proud domestic animals. Having a cat curled up on your lap hits you with a sense of calm. A cat does as it pleases and it is actually an honor when you are chosen as a cat’s friend. More often than not, cats express affection to their owners only if they are already in its memory at a very young age and are treated with consistent affection.

Ferrets



Ferrets are energetic, curious, interested in their surroundings, and have an endearing behaviour to seek to play with humans. Ferrets sleep for 16 hours day and are usually most active during dusk and dawn. However, they are very active when awake and will seek to be released from their cage to exercise and satisfy their abundant curiosity daily.

Due to their nesting instinct, ferrets enjoy carrying small objects to hidden locations. They also like to play tug of war with toys or stuffed animals and explore holes, pipes and enclosed areas.

Hamsters / Gerbils / Guinea Pigs



Hamster – Bites and you need to work with them in order for this to stop. Hamsters prefer to be alone. These are more fun to watch playing in tubes and fancy cages.



Gerbil – Incredibly sweet but nippy at the beginning. They are great fun to watch chew up cardboard but will also chew any plastic they can get their teeth on. A mini theme park cage is a no-no. Tubes can easily become escape pods. They like attention from you and will stand up when you come around. They also enjoy coming out of their cage for some supervised time out on the couch. Oh, and they breed by the thousands!



Guinea Pig – Loving, needs and loves attention from you. Cute, friendly and easy to hold. They are bigger than hamsters and gerbils and that makes them easier to cuddle with. They are quite noisy when they want to be and they do tend to smell a bit. If I had to choose between these 3, I’d go for guinea pigs.

Tortoise / Terrapins



Terrapin – Found in most home tanks. They live mainly on land but need water to wet themselves with. They are both carnivorous and vegetarian, eating small fishes, water weeds and algae.



Tortoise – A land creature that is strictly vegetarian and hibernates through winter. Common tortoise species like the tropical tortoise does not hibernate. They make good garden pets as they eat up the weeds.

Fish



It’s most suitable for pet-loving people who don’t have enough time or money for a more interactive pet like a cat or dog. They are relatively easier to care for. Fish are colourful, intriguing and brings about a soothing presence in the room. Why do you think there is usually a fish tank in dentist offices?

Rabbits



While they are certainly easier to manage than dogs, they still require some attention. As they nib a lot, you may need to protect electric cords with casings or they may get fried. They require exercise to refrain from depression. An owner should be willing to pamper the rabbit with petting and play.

Parakeets



Parakeets are usually most active at dawn and dusk and their sweet voices are usually heard during those times. If they are kept in an aviary, these are the times they usually fly. During other parts of the day they remain relatively sedentary. They may also give a sharp high-pitched alarm call if they are startled, and also twitter cutely when they eat. Caring for a parakeet is easy.

Sugar Gliders



They are small, relatively easy to care for, and have a cute appearance. They make very good social, playful and entertaining pets. Sugar gliders are fairly clean, healthy and can live up to 14 years. However, their nails are sharp and require trimming. It may be a little painful when they land on you. All sugar gliders require a proper diet or they may face a potential problem stemming from a phosphorus / calcium imbalance.

Ground Squirrels



These cute and furry animals are inquisitive and very intelligent. Though they require a great deal of attention, they are relatively easy to domesticate and seem to enjoy being around humans. Ground squirrels are highly social pets. As they are susceptible to internal and external parasites, they have to visit the vet regularly. Do check whether if it is legal to own one in your state first before considering one.

Below is a collection of designer wedding cakes from all around the world. This comprehensive list of 200++ will give you a rough idea on how cool wedding cakes look like.

Wedding cakes
An enourmous directory

The people behind the store signs below either did intentionally or unintentionally. Either way, it’s funny! The funnier ones are of course names of asian restaurants. The owners should’ve done some homework before deciding on the name. It may cause a stiff stomach from laughing too much.

1. They were normal, until they went for dry cleaning.

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   Go Gay

2. Bobby : Dude, let’s buy some tools to fix this thing. Know of any place?
   Dorian : Screw it, man!
   Bobby : Whoaw.. relax man.. it’s just tools.. no need for the harsh tone..

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   Screw It

3. It’s hard cause it’s so cold

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   Stiff Nipples

4. A clever optometrist.

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   Spex In The City

5. Another smart optometrist.

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   Spex Appeal

6. I use S&M Trucking because I like to know that my package is properly bound down.

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   S&M Trucking

7. Watermelon flavored fried chicken. The combo includes a 40 and greens.

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   Flavors of Negros

8. Once you cum, you have to leave town. Everyone here’s a virgin.

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   Tillicum village

9. A college good enough.

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   Goodenough College

10. Encouraging safe sex after a meal.

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    Cabbage and Condoms

11. Me so hapi to eat here again.

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    Miso Hapi.

12. Bobby : Where you wanna eat tonight, man?
    Dorian : The Fu King Chinese Restaurant!
    Bobby : Whoaw.. relax dude.. what’s with the rage?

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    Fu King Chinese Restaurant

13. Tastes so good you’ll wanna swear.

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    Ho Lee Chow Chain of Chinese food

14. Waitress : Good afternoon to you! Welcome to Fuk Mi.

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    Fuk Mi Sushi

15. Bobby : Where you wanna eat tonight, man?
    Dorian : Fook Yue!
    Bobby : What?! Why?! What did I do?! It’s just a question man!

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    Fook Yue Seafood

16. Freshly squeezed…. Mmmm….

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    Lovejuice

17. Is it real?

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    Pho Real

18. Bubba! Come on, man. It’s not nice.

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    Bubba’s Animal Rescue & BBQ

19. This actually isn’t a bad idea.. a buffet with strippers!

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    Nasty buffet

20. Imagine moms waiting to give you a good deal.

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    MILFS Ford

21. Better here than the streets.

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    Supermarket Of Hoes

22. These surgeons enjoy multi tasking.

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    Oral & Facial

23. Are the rates reasonable?

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    Pussy Cleaners

24. It comes with clean and clear gardens.

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    I’ve Got Hoes

25. Doesn’t sound like family restaurant to me.

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    Shagnasti

26. I always wanted a son.

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    KidsExchange

27. An organization of specialist contractors.

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    BJ Queen Enterprises

28. Enough. Let’s go inside already.

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    Labia Theater

29. After Superwoman retired, she started a company.

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    Clithero

30. One of the coolest business name you can ever have.

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    OMFG

31. Another one of the coolest business name you can ever have.

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    WTF

32. So good, you’ll poop!

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    Poo Ping Palace

33. A new service that costs 99 cents.

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    New BJ

34. They were not only long, they were pho kim long!

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    Pho Kim Long

35. Bobby : Where are your parents, man?
    Dorian : They’re at the Pho King Restaurant!
    Bobby : You could use some anger management, dude.

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    Pho King Restaurant

Ushiku Daibutsu of Ushiku, Ibaraki Prefecture, Japan

Height : 110 m (Tallest in the world!)



Guan Yin of Sanya, Hainan, China

Height : 108 m



Emperors Yan and Huang of Zhengzhou, China

Height : 106 m



Dai Kannon of Sendai, Japan

Height : 100 m (2 X Olympic size swimming pool length)



Peter the Great of Moscow, Russia

Height : 96 m



Grand Buddha at Ling Shan of Wuxi, Jiangsu Province, China

Height : 88 m



Dai Kannon at Kita no Miyako park of Ashibetsu, Hokkaido, Japan

Height : 88 m



Rodina Mat’Zovyot! (Mother Motherland Calls) at Mamayev Kurgan of Volgograd, Russia

Height : 85 m



Awaji Kannon of Awaji Island, Hyago Prefecture, Japan

Height : 80 m



Great Standing Maitreya Buddha of Beipu, Hsinchu County, Taiwan, China

Height : 72 m



Leshan Giant Buddha of Leshan, China

Height : 71 m



Mother Motherland of Kiev, Ukraine

Height : 62 m



Jibo Kannon at Narita-san temple of Kurume, Fukuoka prefecture, Japan

Height : 62 m



Guan Yin at Mount Xiqiao of Nanhai district, Guangzhou, China

Height : 62 m



Aizu Jibo Dai-Kannon of Aizuwakamatsu, Fukushima, Japan

Height : 57 m



Tokyo Wan Kannon of Futtsu, Chiba, Japan

Height : 56 m



Hanuman Murti of New Delhi, India

Height : 53 m



Usami Dai-Kannon of Izu Peninsula, Ito, Shizuoka, Japan

Height : 50 m



Dai Kannon of Kamaishi, Iwate, Japan

Height : 48.5 m



Ten Directions Pu Xian Buddha of Mount Emei, Sichuan province, China

Height : 48 m



Vargen de la Paz (Virgin of Peace) of Trujillo, Venezuela

Height : 46.7 m



Liberty Enlightening the World of Liberty Island, New York, United States

Height : 46 m



Birth of the New Man (Christopher Columbus) of Sevilla, Spain

Height : 45 m



Lord Murugan of Batu Caves, Gombak, Malaysia

Height : 42.7 m



Grand Byakue Kannon of Takasaki, Gunma Prefecture, Japan

Height : 41.8 m



Great Matzu of Meizhou Island, Fujian, China

Height : 40.5 m



Jose Maria Morelos of Janitzio island, Michoacan, Mexico

Height : 40 m



Fo Guang Shan Amitabha Buddha of Kaohsiung, Taiwan, China

Height : 40 m



Lord Shiva of Murudeshwara, district of Uttara Kannada, Karnataka, India

Height : 37 m



The Merlion of Sentosa, Republic of Singapore

Height : 37 m



Padmasambhava (Guru Rinpoche) of Namchi, India

Height : 36 m



Bodhisattva Kannon of Tazawako, Akita prefecture, Japan

Height : 35 m



Cristo de la Concordia of Cochabamba, Bolivia

Height : 34.2 m



Tian Tan Buddha of Ngong Ping, Lantau Island, Hong Kong

Height : 34 m



Notre-Dame du Sacre-Coeur (Our Lady of the Sacred Heart) of Le Mas-Rillier in Dombes, Ain department, France

Height : 33 m



Golden Maitreya Buddha of Beopjusa, Naesongni-myeon, Chungcheongbuk-do province, South Korea

Height : 33 m



Laozi statue in Mount Mao near Zhenjiang of Jiangsu province, China

Height : 33 m



Mindroling Monastery Buddha of Dehradun, Uttarakhand state, India

Height : 32.6 m



Standing Buddha in Wat Indrawiharn of Bangkok, Thailand

Height : 32 m



Bhaisajyaguru in Nihon-Ji Temple of Kyonan, Awa District, Chiba, Japan

Height : 31 m



Lord Shiva of the Har-ki-Pauri, Haridwar, Uttarakhand, India

Height : 30.5 m



Virgen de El Panecillo (Virgin in The Panecillo) of Quito, Ecuador

Height : 30 m



Guan Yin of Kek Lok Si Temple, Air Itam, Penang island, Malaysia

Height : 30 m



Cristo Redentor de Concorvado (Christ the Redeemer) of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

Height : 30 m



Cristo del Otero (Jesus) of Palencia, Spain

Height : 30 m

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless
accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage,
and current medical report from your doctor.

NAME__________________ DATE OF BIRTH_______

HEIGHT______ WEIGHT______ IQ__________ GPA______

SOCIAL SECURITY #_________ DRIVERS LICENSE #________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES_______________________

HOME ADDRESS_____________ CITY/STATE______ ZIP__

Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
If No, explain:
__________________________________________

Number of years they have been married _________________

If less than your age, explain ___________________

_____________________________________________

Do you own a van? _______________

A truck with oversized tires? _______________

A waterbed?_______________

A pickup with a mattress in the back?_______________

Do you have an earring, nose ring, or a navel ring? _______________

A tattoo?_______________

(IF YES TO THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES)

In 50 words or less, what does LATE mean to you?___________

________________________________________________

________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does “DON’T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER” mean to you?

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does ABSTINENCE mean to you?

_______________________________________________

_______________________________________________

Church you attend _______________________________

How often you attend ____________________________

When would be the best time to interview your:

father? _____________

mother? _____________

pastor? _____________

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers are
confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:

____________________________________________________

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:

____________________________________________________

C: A woman’s place is in the:

____________________________________________________

D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:

____________________________________________________

What do you want to do IF you grow up? _________________

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What is the current going rate of a hotel room? ____________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE
BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE
AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER
TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.

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Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)

Thank you for your interest. Please allow four to six years for
processing.

You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not
try to call or write (since you probably can’t, and it would cause you
injury). If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two
gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases (you might watch
your back).

That is my cousin Chris with his just-married-wife Anna at their wedding ceremony about 2 weeks ago. They newlyweds looked stunningly happy. I noticed that the church they had their wedding in looked classical. And then I thought about myself. About where I am going to have mine when my time comes. If it ever comes. =)

Anyways, I’m sure when you wed, you’d want to have a kick ass, memorable place to do it too. I searched and found many people asking about idea places to have a wedding at. Well, here are your answers for several of the common places found all over the world that you would want to have your wedding at.

Seaside / Beach / Ocean Front Wedding

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Couples from all over the world exchanging vows on the white sugar sand beaches, with the emerald water and breath-taking sunsets as a backdrop. Escalate the excitement by having everyone go barefoot.

Castle / Mansion Wedding

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Celebrities seem to have a thing with castles and mansions. One of the reasons lie in the magnitude of the place. All the rooms and halls are huge and can take thousands. I know there are lots and lots of castles in England, Scotland and Wales that make it as stunningly romantic venues for a wedding.

Church Wedding

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Christians’ favourite wedding spot. It’s easier to organize, and the backdrop will never change be it stormy or sunshine.

Poolside Wedding

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You can easily find a nice modern looking pool in any 5 star hotel near your city. If you could find a poolside by the ocean front, even better.

Garden Wedding

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Sunrise brings out the best of garden weddings. It’s when the birds and bees are out and about.

Ballroom Wedding

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It’s easier but it costs more. Guests will most certainly feel comfortable and grand as it is done in a ballroom.

Park Wedding

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Ah.. the pond, the trees, the birds and a swing set.

Lake Wedding

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Almost like the ocean front, only that instead of beaches, you’ll get mountains.

Boat / Cruise / Ship Wedding

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The love boat. The difference is that you are moving. It feels like taking a journey.

Lighthouse Wedding

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Something different. A wedding by the lighthouse brings about a historical, classical feeling.

Waterfall Wedding

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Waterfall weddings rock! Get engulfed with the tranquility of nature surrounding it, especially the sound of the water falling.

Bridge Wedding

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There are scenic bridges around but you have to put in some effort to search for them. It’s special, as it looks a bit like a fairytail affair. It signifies the ‘bridging’ of two people.

Art Gallery Wedding

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Art galleries are posh places. Imagine your wedding event being adorned by astounding works of art.

Fountain Wedding

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Imagine having fountains as a beautiful backdrop for weddings. It’s nice, serene and unique.

Mountain Top Wedding

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Nothing else makes you feel more on top of the world than a wedding on a mountain top overlooking the valley or city.

Any Which Way You Can

Big Daddy

Blow

Deep Impact

Deep Throat

Dick

Fire Down Below

Fists Of Fury

Freddy Got Fingered

Free Willy

In & Out

Lethal Weapon

Howard’s End

Shaft

The Black Stallion

The Fast and the Furious

Three Men and a Little Lady

Unlawful Entry

While You Were Sleeping

Woman On Top

xXx

The only shield against sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy. The condom was thought to have been in use since 3,000 years ago when an Egyptian drawing of a condom being worn was found. The reduced sensation of the average condom prolongs performance. Also, there are many other types out there that are supposedly made to enhance both male and female pleasure. Below are the 20 types and shapes of condoms available in convenient stores worldwide.

His n’ Her



The His n’ Her pleasure features a dramatic bulb-like shape at the head which allows nerve endings to remain at their most sensitive, producing significantly more pleasure for him while the 68 ribs along the rubber dramatically enhances her pleasure.

Double Play



Double Play condoms are new members of the ‘Unlimited Edition’ from LifeStyles. A unique shape that is tailored for a man along with ultimate texture for a womans needs. The bottom is covered with 10 rows of studs while the head of the condom has 5 rows of ribs.

Mutual Pleasure



Mutual Pleasure condoms have two sections of ribs, 8 ribs at the top and 24 ribs at the bottom. The ribs along with hundreds of raised studs are sure to increase her pleasure but the condom is also wider at the top with a contoured shape to increase comfort and pleasure for him.

Crown Studded



This super thin Japanese condom offers a wider, more comfortable shape along with added strength and studs for her pleasure.

Her Sensation



Her Sensation condoms are designed specifically to enhance a womans pleasure with 30 rows of ribs specially positioned where it will make a difference for her. Her Sensation ribbed condoms have a silky smooth lubricant and a pleasant berry scent that enhances the intimacy unlike the latex smell of standard condoms.

Beyond Seven Studded



45 rows of textured dots, 1350 in all. Thin, strong and silky soft, these lightly lubricated condoms are made of a latex called Sheerlon, an advanced material so strong and durable, it can be made much thinner than an ordinary latex rubber condom. Beyond seven has a slightly narrower shape and a light blue tint and are said to produce the most sensitive condoms in the market.

High Sensation



Combine ultra thin latex with added texture for a one of a kind experience. Durex High Sensation features raised ribs throughout its entire length.

Vibra Ribbed



Covered from head to toe in vibrant ribs, the LifeStyles Vibra-Ribbed was the original ribbed condom designed to provide maximum sensation for a man and a woman.

Intense Sensation



These condoms are studded with texture for extreme pleasure. With hundreds of raised studs, Durex Intense Sensation are sure to add intense excitement and sensation.

Type E



This lubricated condom gives greater sensation and stimulation to both because the form fitting design has row upon row of textured ‘Sensi-Dots’ and ribs for extra sensation. Although 20% thinner than standard condoms, Kimono Type E far exceed both FDA and tougher international specifications for quality and reliability.

Shared



Trojan Shared Sensation has alternating rows of raised bumps and ridges for her and a flared design that’s roomy at the tip for him.

Pleasure Plus



The Pleasure Plus condom has a large, loose pouch of additional ribbed latex, positioned near the head and underside of the condom. During sex, the extra latex slides back and forth against the very sensitive underside of the penis. This is the key to the Pleasure Plus condoms. The moving latex restores the stimulation essential to sexual pleasure for both men and women!

Inspiral



The Inspiral condom creates a springy action unlike any other condom on the market. The Inspiral condom’s unique twisting shape creates stimulation in sensitive nerve endings actually making the condom feel thinner than it really is.

Twisted Pleasure



The Twisted Pleasure has a special twist at the closed end, to help stimulate both partners in their most sensitive areas. With it’s unique patented shape, the Twisted Pleasure is designed for mutual pleasure.

X-tra Pleasure



X-tra Pleasure with its new innovative design, features a dramatic bulb-like shape at the head which allows nerve endings to remain at their most sensitive, producing significantly more pleasure.

Supra



Trojan Supra condoms are made from a Medical-grade advanced material called Microsheer. Supra condoms are ultra thin, strong and invisibly clear. Compatible with both water based and oil based lubricants, Supra polyurethane condoms have no latex allergens, and they transmit body heat unlike latex.

Performax



The name says it all. Manufactured with a special climax control lubricant, Durex Performax condoms help prolong male sexual performance while maintaining sensation for both parties.

Her Pleasure



The perfect combination of the long bulb shaped head and the raised treads on the shaft were designed with the woman in mind. Trojan’s Her Pleasure has a loose fitting head and with all the extra latex moving around makes for extra stimulation for him as well as her. Trojan Her Pleasure condoms are lubricated and feature a reservoir tip for added security against breakage.

Microthin



Sheer strength, sheer pleasure, Kimono microthin condoms are 38% thinner and crafted to exacting standards of quality, these form fitting Kimono condoms have earned the super-thin crown.

Night Light



Your very own light sabers. Night Light glow in the dark condoms are manufactured to the same standards as typical condoms, and provide the same protection and safety as typical condoms. They’re just much more fun.

Lying is something that happens everyday in every society. A person may want to to deceive, maintain a secret or reputation, or to avoid punishment. In business, politics, romance or at home it happens and it would also be nice to know when we’re being lied to.

1. Fidgeting

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Fidgeting is the most obvious giveaway. Watch for hands and legs that are shaky, rubbing, stiff, self directed, touching the face, nose, chest or behind the ear. Arms crossed over the chest while speaking is the body language for protection and sense of insecurity linked to lying. Other actions include biting the lip, covering the mouth, rubbing the forehead or temple, squinting of the eyes or rubbing of the neck. Women tend to touch their throat’s trachial area.

2. Over Denial



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Repeating protests of innocence.

3. Lack Of Detail

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Liars’ stories often lack detail. Push for particulars. The more specific details that a liar has to provide, the more likely he is to slip up.

4. Uncooperative

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Liars are noticeably less cooperative. They are also more likely to complaint, make more negative statements and appear unfriendly to minimize slip ups.

5. Eye Contact

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Unwillingness to make or never breaking eye contact is often sign of deceit.

6. Dilated Pupils

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Dilated pupils and a rise in vocal pitch are more common in liars than people who told the truth.

7. Pausing

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Forced to make up a story on the spot, most speakers will take a beat or two to collect their thoughts. Lies require a quick mental review of what they have told others to avoid inconsistency and to make up new details as needed.

8. Inconsistency

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Having someone repeat the story again will enable you to look for inconsistencies to ferret out lies.

9. Consciously Trying Too Hard

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Someone who is consciously trying to make you think he’s honest may be lying. For example you may hear the phrase ‘to be honest’ more often than not. Generally, people assume that they will be trusted most of the time. If someone expects otherwise, take a moment to think.

10. Being Open To Possibilities

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Liars succeed in the area where listeners themselves do not really want to know the truth. So be honest with yourself about what it is you want to hear. A boss may want to believe that a trusted employee didn’t have his hand in the cookie jar. However, does the story make sense?

11. Eye Direction

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Their eyes are not fixed upon whom they are speaking to. If the person looks up to the left upper corner of their eye, they are pulling strategy from their right side of the brain, which is the creative side, therefore creating a situation or lying. Looking at the right upper corner of the eye will invoke the left side of the brain which indicates visual recalling.

12. Stuttering

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Stumbling over words without natural fluency.

13. Change Of Subject

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Changing subjects quickly. A liar will definitely welcome the change and try to maintain the new subject. Their interests are clearly seen. An innocent person will appear confuse and may also try returning to the previous subject.

14. Level Of Comfort

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When someone is comfortable with you while answering your questions, they will move to their comfort positions, eg. tilting their head to one side or the other. When asked a question that they might lie about or feel threatened by, they will straighten or stiffen up, no longer tilting their head.

15. Unusually Longer Response

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Q : Are there any drugs or weapons in your car?
A : There shouldn’t be.
Q : Is this your car?
A : Yes.

There are drugs and/or guns/knives in the car. An innocent person in their own car would answer with an emphatic ‘NO’. Unusually much longer responses or too many details may tip you off to their desperation to get you to believe them.

16. Filling The Gap

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Someone trying to lie may also ‘bridge’ over something they do not want to tell you.

17. Ah’s Um’s Er’s

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People using um, ah, hmm, before answering questions are trying to think of an answer, that more times than not, is going to be a lie.

18. Over Formal Speech

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Use of long words, painfully correct grammar and the full form of words or phrases that would normally be shortened, suggesting a scripted speech rather than natural conversation.

19. Very Few Gestures And No Pointing

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Physical movements illustrating something being described is a common and natural activity.

20. Justification

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Attempting to justify every detail with lengthy explanations.

21. Conflict In Verbal And Physical Projection

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You can find many discrepancies between a lie and the actions. You may also find mismatches between the tone of voice and expression. Be sensitive to the person’s emotional expression, specifically the timing and duration, which tends to be off when someone is lying. Emotions can be delayed, remain longer than usual, then stop suddenly. Likewise, they might not match appropriately with verbal statements.

22. Most Obvious Giveaway



On paper. Seeing what someone said in writing is much more effective in detecting lies than listening to them.

If someone who knows what he is going to be asked will surely have prepared himself. The best liars in the world are the most thorough ones. For example, when Bill Clinton looked at those reporters and told them he never had relations ‘with that woman’ and never blinked or gave ANY indication he was lying, he broke the mold.

A red-light district is a neighborhood where prostitution is a common part of everyday life. It was discovered in the US at around the 1890s, and derives from the practice of placing a red light in the window to indicate to customers the nature of the business. This is based on the biblical story of Rahab, a prostitute in Jericho who aided the spies of Joshua and identified her house with a scarlet rope.

Below are some of the more well known red light districts across cities of the US.

• Alaska

Anchorage
Spenard Road

• Arizona

Phoenix
Van Buren Street
Tucson
Miracle Mile

• California

El Centro
Adams Avenue
Los Angeles
Sunset Boulevard – Hollywood
Western Avenue – Hollywood
San Fernando Valley
Sepulveda Boulevard
San Francisco
Tenderloin

• Colorado

Denver
East Colfax Avenue

• Florida

Orlando
Orange Blossom Trail (OBT)

• Georgia

Atlanta
Metropolitan Parkway (formerly known as Stewart Avenue)
Macon
Broadway
Savannah
River Street
Warner Robins
Front Street

• Hawaii

Honolulu
Hotel Street

• Iowa

Council Bluffs
South 24th Street

• Louisiana

New Orleans
Bourbon Street
Baton Rouge
Plank Road

• Maryland

Baltimore
The Block

• Michigan

Detroit
8 Mile Road
Michigan Ave (Southwest Side)
Grand Rapids
Division Avenue

• Minnesota

Minneapolis
Washington & Central Avenue

• Nebraska

Omaha
Saint Marys Avenue/Leavenworth Street

• Nevada

Reno
Fourth Street

• New York

New York City
Hunts Point

• Oklahoma

Oklahoma City
South Robinson Avenue (between SE 29th and 44th Streets)

• Texas

Dallas
Harry Hines (Note: Way overpriced)
Houston
Bissonnet and Beltway 8,US 59S(Southwest Freeway at Hillcroft),Montrose

• Washington, DC

13th-16th streets between L and M NW
Vermont Avenue, NW

Did you know that the bible and Qur’an contain a lot of similar names that are still being used worldwide today? Well, below are a collection of all that I can find around the web.

1. Aaron / Harun
2. Abel / Habil
3. Abraham / Ibrahim
4. Adam (pronounced eh-duhm) / Adam (pronounced ah-dumb)
5. Adel / Habil
6. Alexander / Iskandar
7. Cain / Qabil
8. Caleb / Kalab
9. David / Daud
10. Eber / Hud
11. Elijah / Ilyas
12. Elisha / al-Yasa
13. Enoch / Idris
14. Eve / Hawwa
15. Ezekiel / Hisqul
16. Ezra / Uzair
17. Gabriel / Jibrail
18. George / Jirjis
19. Goliath / Jalut
20. Isaac / Ishaq
21. Isaiah / Shaya
22. Ishmael / Ismail
23. Jacob / Yaakob
24. Jesus / Isa
25. Jethro / Shoaib
26. Job / Ayub
27. John / Yahya
28. Joseph / Yusuf
29. Jonah / Yunus
30. Joshua / Yusha
31. Lot / Lut
32. Mary / Miriam
33. Moses / Musa
34. Michael / Mikhal
35. Nebuchadnezzar / Bukht Nassar
36. Nimrod / Numrud
37. Noah / Nuh
38. Peter / Petra
39. Rachel / Rahil
40. Samuel / Shamwil
41. Saul / Talut
42. Seth / Shi
43. Shelah / Saleh
44. Solomon / Sulaiman
45. Zechariah / Zakaria

A sketch from the much underrated brit comedy Smack the Pony.

The age old saying of women are from venus and men are from mars. True to a certain point when it comes to the very defferent things that attract both sexes. Men are attracted to looks and women are attracted to status. These are the 3 things women look for in men and these are the 6 type of guys that exist in women’s eyes.

The 4th thing that a woman must have is that she needs to feel like a woman. She needs to enjoy being beautiful, sexy and feminine. All of those come with being a woman. They could mean :

• A day at the spa, manicure, facial, pedicure, massage, mud bath. These are some of the sensual and aesthetic pleasures designed to make her forget life’s problems and focus on herself. She loves the feeling of being pampered.
• A night out with her sisters at the local pub, bar, pot luck, dinner, party. These are the relationship activities that keeps her connected to her friends and help remind her that she’s not alone. Just sitting around, talking, laughing and enjoying each other meets her intrinsic need to bond and validation.
• Shopping for something special to add to the closet to make her feel like a woman. She shops to feel good, to look better and to get a buzz. It’s a substitutive satisfaction. A woman cares more about her outward appearances more than men. A portion of women are materialistic to a certain extent, but with exceptions.
• Getting a makeover or new hairdo. Women like the feeling of ‘new’ (there’s a word for it that starts with v but I can’t think of it at the moment) and going for a new look is always as exciting as the previous. A new lipstick, eyeshadow or blush changes her look. A different hairstyle will definitely change her face. It’s also part of feeling pampered when the hairstylist gives all the attention to styling that perfect hair for her.

The best thing about a woman feeling like a woman is the prerogative, to have a little fun, get in the action, feel the attraction and to have a good time.

=)

As I have written previously before, women look for these 3 things in a man. You know when a woman is missing something when they look for it outside their marriage. If sex sucks, she gets a hot, exhilarating lover. If the husband’s sex skill is enough to satisfy but she’s not really treated with respect, she’ll look for someone else who can give that. If the marriage lacks emotional intimacy, then she’ll be out there to fulfill her emotional needs. It’s usually one or more needs not met that drives a woman who goes outside of her marriage. For some, if it means getting 2 different men to meet her needs, she’ll just do it.

Below are the 6 type of guys that exist in women’s eyes.

The Bad Ass

She feels sexiest when with a bad ass. He is usually masculine and pretty skillful in bed. However, he’s a born bad ass playboy. He’s known to be a cheating nincompoop. Emotional connection does not exist in this kind of relationship, so does respect. The point of addiction is only sex. She will try to break his wild ways but it is useless. When the time comes, she’ll leave. Normal fights won’t do it. Only if the breakup involves a lot of emotions.

Mr. Nice

David DeAngelo, the dating guru, calls this type of guy the wussy. A wuss is someone defined as weak and unmanly. He is be able to make her feel appreciated and establish the emotional connection but he’s boring. He’s not manly enough to neither make her feel sexy nor turned on about sex. This type of relationship may eventually lead to marriage. He’d be a good fit for a family but he may not be enough to complete her sexual fantasies.

The Emotionally Unavailable Guy

This type of guy is one of the closest that she may get to an ideal relationship. Not a wussy, not a cheating nincompoop. The muscles and good sex will fulfill the sexual part plus he is also a gentleman who makes her feel appreciated. However, he’s emotionally unavailable. There is no emotion, so she complains. One of the biggest complaints that women have. Everything is there, but shit, he’s not emotionally available. She will try her hardest to get him to open up which never happens. Women are built on emotions, they need it, which when the time comes she will leave.

The Gay

There are also other types of men around like her gay friend. He makes her feel sexy and he genuinely makes her feel appreciated. They share a lot in common, but shit, he’s gay. In the end it is still not enough.

The Secret Lover

The secretly mysterious lover may never be part of any of her plans, but shit, the sex is addictive. Maybe once in a blue moon when she feels bored with the daily routine that has been going on for her, she’ll arrange to see him for one thing and one thing only. The fulfilling sex. Upon satisfaction, she leaves with the hope of finding her complete man.

The Married Man

The 6th type is the married man. There’s a saying that the perfect guys are all married. It simple means an unavailable man has higher value. Only the type of women that wants what she can’t have, will go for it. The sex is crazy good, she feels super sexy, the emotional connection is there BUT he will NEVER leave his wife. Though she doesn’t feel special, it is difficult for her to leave. The reason lies in her low self esteem.

The above were examples of men in her life. As you can see, one or more of her needs are not being met in each example. And by looking at what is missing, you can conclude what she has to have. =)

A man on a morning show chat segment asks if he can say something special to his girlfriend who always watches the show.

Let’s be real. When we look at relationships, we find that some are stronger and successful than others. In successful, both parties get what they need. In weaker relationships, one or more needs are not being met. This gives us a clue to what women need.

Emotional Intimacy

Emotional intimacy depends primarily on trust, as well as the nature of the relationship and the culture in which it is observed. Women need to know that a man understands what she feels and is confident enough for her to share her emotions with him. This is the problem with men. Men tend to communicate intellectually and verbally in relationships. Women on the other hand, tend to relate on an emotional level.

Imagine this. You open the door to her room and see her crying. I’m pretty sure that most guys will do one of these 5.

• Ask her what’s wrong?
• Tell her to stop crying?
• Be afraid, imagine the worst?
• Get mad and demand that she stop making a scene?
• Get frustrated and stalk out?

Guess what? None of the above improves intimacy. Men usually do not want to ‘feel’ the problem. They just want to solve it. A better approach is to sit with her, hold her hand and ask, ‘Is there anything I can do?’ If she says no, accept that and let her know that you care and are there when she’s ready to talk. =)

Respect

Respect to women simply means

• Never, ever strike her no matter what the provocation.
• Respect all women as equal. Question sexism.
• Contribute equally to household chores.
• Don’t expect her to serve you like a king. Respect her by not expecting her to wash, dry, fold or iron your clothes.

Sexual Intimacy

She grew up in the social programming that it is feminine and proper to be sexually submissive, and that it is unacceptable to be sexually forward. By being sexually submissive, she can enjoy sexuality without being to blame for it. She can be ‘slutty’ without being a ‘slut’. Thus, she can be fully sexually expressive by simply following the lead of her man.

Therefore, in order for her to have a fulfilling sexual life, she is going to need a man who can lead her, such that she can experience those things that make her feel the way she has always wanted to feel. So she needs a man that she respects, because she will only follow the lead of a man that she takes seriously.

Here’s an easy yet cool trick to get a cork out of the inside of a wine bottle. If you haven’t here are are 2 articles that I wrote which are related to this video, in a way. The first article is about the health benefits of red wine and how wine tasting works. Have a look. =)

Here’s a video documentary by ABC Primetime Special on The Mystery Method, a group of guys teaching wannabes how to pick up women. Attending a 3 days course will eat up $2500 from your bank account. Imagine the price if it were to be held in other countries like Australia (then it would be almost A$5000).

The Mystery Method
Put beautiful women under your spell

One of my friends is going to China to work in 5 days time. Although he is a Chinese, he cannot really speak Mandarin. So I imagined myself going to China and thinking of how it would be like for me to communicate with the locals. I believe that it would be pretty troublesome if I didn’t even know some of the common words. It applies to travelers in foreign countries. Learning at least these 16 common English words in another language would certainly make things easier for the travelers. Not everyone speaks English.

Anyways, here’s the super cool site that has the 16 commonly used English words translated into all the world’s languages. It’s very useful when you know at least how to say ‘thank you’ or ‘hello’. Locals may find you amusing and give you special treatment.

Here are the 16 polite words that comes in handy.

1. Cheers!
2. Excuse Me
3. Good Afternoon
4. Good Evening
5. Good Morning
6. Good Night
7. Goodbye
8. Hello
9. I do not understand
10. Nice to meet you
11. No
12. Please
13. Thank you
14. Thank you very much
15. Yes
16. You’re welcome

I know how to say ‘Good Morning’ in a few foreign languages like bonjour (French), o hayou gozaimasu (Japanese), selamat pagi (Malaysian) and cho san (Cantonese).

=P

English To Local Languages
Be polite when traveling

Wine tasting. Evaluating the color, aroma, flavor and feel as it touches each part of the mouth. To assess the quality, maturity for drinking and detect the flaws if any. Professional wine tasters and sommeliers around the world attend all 4 types of win tasting events. Each event will have its own significance in preparation and highlights. There is also a standard order and process to follow during tasting.

Types of Wine Tasting Events

Blind Tasting

An example. 2 glasses. 1 is Coca Cola. 1 is Pepsi. Taste and judge. The same technique is used in wine tasting too. It helps to ensure impartial judgment of a wine. Certain blind tasting events include black wine glasses as well to mask the color of the wine. A taster’s judgment can easily be influenced when geographic origin, price, reputation, producer, vintage, color and other details are made known.

Vertical Tasting

Different vintages of the same wine type from the same winery are tasted. The point is to differentiate the taste of the same wine from different years.

Horizontal Tasting

The wines are all from the same vintage but are from different wineries. Keeping wine variety or type and wine region the same helps emphasize differences in winery styles.

Flight Tasting

Wines presented for the intention of sampling and comparison of certain features. For example, several wines from the same region and vintage would comprise a flight or several wines from the same variety but different regions. Tasting organizers are responsible for the selection of flights to enable tasters to easily highlight the similarities and differences of the wine presented.

Tasting Order

Tasting order is important in maintaining the accuracy of the taster’s assessment. Heavier or sweeter wines dominate lighter ones. The tasting order should be like :

• Sparkling Wines
• Light White Wines
• Heavy White Wines
• Rose Wines
• Light Red Wines
• Heavy Red Wines
• Sweet Wines

Appearance and nose alone is sufficient to determine the order of the wines that should be assessed in. Heavier wines are deeper in color and more overwhelming to the nose. Sweeter wines are denser and will leave legs down the inside of the glass when swirled.

Tasting Process

The 5 basic steps in wine tasting (also known as the 5s) are :

• See
• Swirl
• Sniff
• Sip
• Savor

The 6 characters looked at are :

Clarity

The color is better judged when put against a white background. Clues to grape variety and whether the wine was aged in wood through the color.

Varietal Character

Varietal character describes how much a wine presents its inherent grape aromas.

Intergration

A wine taster also looks for integration of the non-grape components of the wine like acid, tannin, alcohol, etc. When a wine is well balanced, the wine is said to have achieved a harmonious fusion.

Expressiveness

Expressiveness is the quality the wine possesses when its aromas and flavors are well-defined and clearly projected. Overhandling the wine bottle can disturb its expressiveness.

Complexity

The complexity of the wine is affected by many factors, one of which may be the multiplicity of its flavors.

Connectedness

The connectedness of the wine, a rather abstract and difficult to ascertain quality, is how connected is the bond between the wine and the land where it comes from.

Pausing to experience a wine’s bouquet aids the wine taster in anticipating the wine’s flavors and focusing the palate. Once inside the mouth, the aromatics are further liberated by exposure to body heat, received by the interior pathway and delivered to the olfactory epithelium. It is here that the complex taste experience characteristic of a wine actually commences.

Thoroughly tasting a wine involves perception of its array of taste and mouthfeel attributes, which involve the combination of textures, flavors, and overall “structure”. Following appreciation of its olfactory characteristics, the wine taster savors a wine by holding it in the mouths for a few seconds to saturate the taste buds. Taste buds are also found in the larynx; therefore an extended sip or draw, in which the wine is allowed pass slowly through the mouth and past the epiglottis, presents the connoisseur with the fullest gustatory profile available to the human palate.

The acts of pausing and focusing through each step distinguishes wine tasting from simple quaffing. Through this process, the full array of aromatic molecules is captured and interpreted by approximately 15 million highly-specific sensory receptors. When tasting several wines in succession, however, key aspects of this fuller experience (length and finish, or aftertaste) must necessarily be sacrificed through expectoration.

A spittoon is usually prepared for the wine tasters to spit out the wine after tasting it. The reason is to prevent alcohol from affecting the consumer’s judgment. At formal tastings where dozens of wine are prepared, tasters will usually spit out the wine after assessing the quality.

Wine Tasting Events by Cities, Worldwide
Beer and spirit tasting as well

This is one of the competitors in the 10th All China Games that took place Aug. 2006. Just a preview of what will take place in the 2008 Olympics. Note that if either one of them were to move a second late or early, it would’ve been bloody.

As we move towards a more complete web 2.0, more and more online dating sites are popping out of nowhere, giving big competitors like match.com and meetic a run for their money. Here are the pros and cons of online dating which everyone should know about. Also, if you haven’t, check out this list of 19 free online dating sites that I’ve written a while ago. You might wanna try submitting your profile to all of the 19 to increase your chances. =)

Pros

• All you need is a computer. Low on resources. Available day or night 24/7.
• Make advances with minimum conversation. New technologies such as sending a ‘smile’ allows sending over a subtle hint to the person you admire. And if they like you, you’ll get a response.
• Continually improving algorithms and tests such as sorting functions, profiles matching and personality tests widens the possibility of finding that potential perfect date.
• Meet people all around the world. Build long distance friendships. Learn about the exciting things they do or food they eat. You’d be taken aback by the surprising world of travel.
• Meet when ready. Imagine having made a date this coming Saturday night and suddenly growing an ugly zit on the forehead on Friday night. Pimples? Bad hair days? All of these don’t matter when it’s online.
• Date parallely. When it comes to email and IM, you get to do it parallely. Respond to as many personals as you want. Chat with a few of your admirers at the same time.
• Save cash. You don’t have to go out on dates to know that the person is lacks what you’re looking for in the first place. When it’s online, you get to discover all his/her interests even before striking a conversation. Online dating allows you to compare yourself to another person before spending on movies, dinner and etc.
• Wear what you want. Chat in your pajamas. There’s no need to dress up. There’s low priority in first impressions. Chat comfortably in a low pressure environment.
• The easy part of online dating not only involves starting conversations but also ending one. If you’ve had enough of a weirdo, you can easily stop all associations with the person. It is much less messy, hurtful and embarrassing.
• Safer in most cases. Most online dating sites track complaints, monitor member’s behavior and deals swiftly with offenders. Imagine efficient club bouncers that throw rowdy people out of the club into the streets.

Cons

• Identities may be fake. As you go along, you’ll pick up the ability to differentiate but it is most risky for first timers. You gotta be careful.
• Some are photogenic, some are not. With the advancement in image enhancing softwares like Photoshop, you can make a tiger grow human hands. However, if you go by the saying of ‘do not judge a book by its cover’, then you should do fine.
• The ‘chemistry’ factor. You may seem like the perfect couple online but things may be different offline. You may only find out compatibility during the 1st ‘real, live’ encounter.

Online Dating Guide
Advantages and disadvantages of dating online

The goal is to put a smile on their faces. As a token of appreciation for the effort and contribution of our fathers for the past 1 year. It’s around the corner and if you still need ideas on what to get for your father, here are 16 suitable father’s day gifts.

Electronic shaver / after shave



All men need this. Save your dad time and get him an electronic shaver. If he already has one, get him an aftershave. Aftershave is essential in closing up the exposed skin pores that happens after shaving. This will prevent any bacteria or dirt from accumulating inside. If you’re a guy and you don’t use aftershave, the red spots that you see after shaving are actually bacteria.

Cologne



Cologne is consumable. Sooner or later, he will finish the current one. Look out for the Father’s Day promotion specials in perfume outlets. They tend to have discounts.

New / interesting underwear / briefs / boxers



Check out his waist size. Then check out whether if he wears briefs, boxers or underwear. Get him a new pair or 2. Throw in some humor. Buy heart shaped ones or polka dots. =P

iPod / accessories



Get him an ipod. If he already has one, get him ipod accessories. Men are all about gadgets.

Laptop accessories



Get him a new laptop skin. You can easily find lots of different laptop skins in online auction sites like ebay.

Digital photo frame key chain viewer



USB digital photo frame that stores pictures will be good for new dads. He can easily show off pictures of his kids when asked.

Jersey / cap / gloves / golf balls



Sports. Most men love sports. Be it golf, baseball, football, basketball, soccer or tennis. Buy him a jersey, baseball cap or golf balls of his favorite player. If he likes to swim, get him a pair of anti fog goggles. A sports bag will also do fine.

Watch



My suggestion would be a nice watch as a gift. It’s like jewlrey without being flashy and girly. Plus it’s thoughtful and practical. And then he gets to wear your present everyday!

Coffee mug



If he doesn’t get him a coffee mug. If he already has one, make him a coffee mug warmer.

Fountain pen



If doesn’t already, get him a fountain pen. Fountain pens are nice to write with because they produce a much more reliable flow of ink.

Wallet / Tie



It’s the most common guy gift. Wallet or tie. Fits well as a gift on any occasion.

A fridge full of his favorite drink



Imagine him waking up to a fridge full of beer. Or a cupboard full of packets of his favorite coffee flavor.

A favorite meal treat / a bag of his favourite chips



As they say, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Bring him out for a dinner. Go someplace that serves his favorite meal. You can also surprise him with a cupboard full of his favorite chips / nuts.

Wallpaper



Print out a poster and stick it on your wall. Have his picture in it, preferably looking cool with sunglasses on or something, and print it out into a big poster consisting of several A4 paper sizes. Or you can take a picture with the rest of the family holding up a ‘Happy Father’s Day!’ sign. Here’s instructions on how to do it.

Write a poem

The things you taught me I will always know.
How could I not? The roots have sunk so deep:
All lessons of the heart that I will keep
No matter who I am or where I go.
Kids learn from what their parents are, and so
You are my book of life, the thoughts I reap;
From you I learned the rules of right and wrong
Against which I at times had to rebel,
Though with regret I carry with me still.
How lucky I am to have been loved so well,
Even as I pushed against your will,
Relying on a father fair and strong.

Body massage



Bring him out on a 1 hour full body massage. Check out the prices and promotions beforehand. Make a booking preferably after lunchtime. Anyone would love being massaged. It feels good.

Meet the latest trend of finding love, Dating 2.0. The best thing about online dating is the ability to choose from hundreds of potential dates freely. It’s even better if you didn’t have to spend a single cent on memberships or annual fees. Now here are 19 FREE online dating sites that you and I would want to join. Why pay when you can get it free? =)

BookOfMatches



ConnectingSingles



DateHookup



LifeKnot



mingle2



okcupid



PlentyOfFish



SixSingles

The current trend, online dating. We can all find online dating pretty easily with the help of big dating sites like simplyclicked, date.com, friendfinder, etc. The fact that you can join as many as you want does not hit the point. The point of being successful in attracting your targets.

Generally, men will make the move to answer personal ads and women put up and select from a long list of responses. The only way for men to be successful in attracting a girl is by examples. Earlier, I wrote a 3 part series, showcasing examples taken from Lorina about how one can answer online personals wrongly.

Today, I have gathered good examples for guys on how to answer online dating personals correctly. Try out some of the examples. Modify the names a bit and reuse them. See the difference. =)

1. If you will call me Mon Cher ( sp? ) I will do all your biddings. I used to be 7ft tall, however my evil twin brother, the disfollically challenged (hairy ) one, he chopped me off at the thighs, and thank god doctors were creative. Now, I am a very normal looking 5’8. Much to my parents dismay.

   My castle, unfortunately, due to downsizing it has become an apartment, but even the apartment is OLD. There are different Faucets for hot and cold water. Not different knobs, different Faucets. I have a thing for Christina Ricci… does that count?? I can Salsa, Merenge, and I am sure, that with a little help Tango and Waltz and Ballroom are just around the corner. Could you be that coach? Okay, so there is alot to say here, however, if you reply, I have a better wit and pictures I can send. Interested so far? I hope so because your picture was fantastic, Love the Boa.

   Until we chat….. Gregory

   Yes.. witty and charming at the same time.. that’s the way

2. I’m always interested in people who strike me as potentially wackier than myself, as I find that to be a rare situation…… hey, I never said I was modest… *lol*

   anyway, if you be interested in learning more about the exciting and adventurous nuances of me, then please…. order now! We’ll even throw in a free set of Ginsu Knives…. =)

   ok…. I’m too tired right now to even realize if I’m funny or not, so I’m gonna go get some sleep….. yes, it’s only midnight, but some of us has been slightly sleep deficient lately…..

   anyway, nice pseudo-chattin with ya…. hope to hear back from you sometime….. oh yeah – I’d be curious as to where exactly you’re located…. I just moved to (name of town located north of Philadelphia) about a month ago, and seeing as how you’re north of Philly….. well, it all starts adding up to something suspicious, if you ask me….. =P

   Take care, Jonn (yep, J-O-N-N… nobody ever gets it right….)

   by the way, I would attach a photo, but I’m too lazy to do so right now (plus it looks like I’d hafta come up with some kinda profile thingie… and I don’t wanna hafta deal with legions of adoring females…. *lol*)…. however, if ya email me back at my normal email address, I’ll be happy to oblige then…. okeley-doakeley?

   This guy shows appreciation towards her humor, doesn’t mention where he works, how tall he is, how old he is, or what he looks like. Sounds cool and calm and not desperate.

3. Hi.

   We should meet.

   I like long walks on the beach in the moonlight.

   All right, you probably didn’t think that was very funny.

   I stumbled across your ad and I see that we have quite a bit in common. Punk, flea markets, retro-tv, etc. Unfortunately, the one thing we don’t have in common is the city we live in. I’m in Rochester. Upstate New York. I know what you’re thinking… “Blecch! Upstate?!” Trust me, it’s not as bad as you might think. Or maybe it is. I don’t know. Well, if you’d care to respond… you know what to do. I’ve got an ad as well. I’ll send it along with this message. It should also have a photograph of me.

   Oh, I almost forgot. I’m in a punk band and I’m making our website. If you want to check it out for kicks: The Runs

   Adios

   Really good! See how this ad doesn’t sound desperate at all? Good stuff.

4. And so, you may ask yourself, who is this man, who felt compelled to respond to my ad? Well, I’m a SWM, 6’1″, 180 lbs, and 28 years old. Never been married, never had kids, don’t drink, don’t smoke. Don’t watch tv. I like to shoot pool (I’m very good), rollerblade (I suck) and go to school. (Working on a master’s degree, then a phd, in electrical engineering.) I work full time, as an engineer, at a sponge factory. (Really. I am not making this up. I mean, who would ever claim that?) I have a wonderfully fulfilling existance, with the exception of miss right, who seems to elude me at every step. (Perhaps she has some type of portable cloaking device, I’m not sure.) I am intelligent, goal-oriented, motivated, attractive (sorry, I don’t have a picture online, I will try to get one if you like.) and hillarious. I would like a chance to e-mail back and forth a bit, and see what you are like.

   Short, funny, to the point.

5. Alas, I’m not bald. And I don’t have sharks with lasers on their head.

   But I do have an evil empire which spans the globe, bringing terror to countless millions. Or I will soon… when I get off of my butt and build it. So.

   Your description definitely stands out from the countless “tired of the bar scene, looking for the right man” variety. If it conveys anything about your personality, then you’d probably get along well with my little group of weirdos. We’re post-college quasi-nerds, floundering in the intellectual wasteland of the Real World, facing the horrific realization that it’s much harder to meet interesting people when you aren’t in a place packed with bright, outgoing people around your age. So, if you are looking for other oddballs to goof around with (or help conquer the world), let me know.

   Lorina was an Austin Powers fan and so this email appealed to her taste. Though it may sound a bit off to others, talking about stuff related to what she likes will help build better first impressions.

6. HI there!! Lemme tell you right off that bat that you have no idea how sick I was of seeing all kinds of adds from all over the place that would say stuff like “Moonlight walks on the beach”, “Romantic Dinners by Candlelight” and all that kinda stuff.

   Don’t get me wrong though. I’m not saying that I’m not romantic either. Just like you said. Romantic stuff like that just happens. It’s not something that you can really plan on. I know that I’ve learned from my own experiances that different things are more romantic with different people. Shoot….I’ve had a good time just sitting with a girl on my patio looking out over the snowfall. That doesn’t mean that I’m going to want to do that with every girl that I date. Know what I mean? I think that you follow me.

   Anyhow….now that you got me rambling (just excited to find someone that thinks like me hehehehe). I’m a smart, realistic kinda guy. Most of the people that know me tell me that I tend to “grow” on them. I think they mean that in a good way, but it makes me feel like I’m some kinda fungus. If your looking for a very sexy, hot guy that’s going to tell you everything that you want to hear just so he can get you in bed….I’m not the guy your looking for. Don’t think that I’m ugly now either cause I’m not…trust me. I can be brutaly honest when I think it’s neccesary. That may sound like a bad thing, but it’s not. I just like to express my feelings about someone. You know that when I compliment you or tell you something that makes you feel good, it’s coming from the heart and I’m not just talking out my ass so that I could get in good with the girl.

   I’m very much a fun loving guy. I like to go out on the weekends to see bands at Brownies Plymouth or Reeds Blue Bell and places like that. If I’m not at a club on the weekends I usually go to a local bar or some other hang out spot to meet with all my buddies. I love shooting pool, playing/watching hockey and music.

   I in no way ever get all sexual when I talk to a girl unless it’s someone that I’ve known for a long time and we both know that it’s all in fun and aren’t going to get offended by it. I do LOVE a girl with a sense of humor. I have a good sense of humor myself and the more warped the better. My favorite comedy show is Uprights Citizen Brigade and favorite web page is www.theonion.com and www.doodie.com (have to go there if you never have) as well as www.redmeat.com

   I know that you fit my bill, I don’t know if I fit yours though, but that’s ok cause it’s good to see that there are girls out there like you. Vital Stats (hehehe): 25 male, 6’0″, 210lbs, black hair, brown eyes. Live near Norristown (thought not actually in it). I work for an executive office suite in Wayne, PA. Here is the only real difference that I’ve found between us thus far…I go to the gym and lift weights about 4 times a week and I like to eat relativly healthy, though I’m no health nut….trust me. I just like good food (seafood, veggies, etc)

   Don’t know what else to say right now. I really hope that you get this email and that I hear back from you.

   Long, but this is everything an ad response should be. Sounds realistic and intelligent at the same time.

Lorina’s Knowledge Base
Internet dating and personals ads examples

FEUDALISM : You have two goats. Your lord takes some of the milk.

PURE SOCIALISM : You have two goats. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else’s goats. You have to take care of all of the goats. The government gives you as much milk as you need.

BUREAUCRATIC SOCIALISM : You have two goats. The government takes them and put them in a barn with everyone else’s goats. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you need.

FASCISM : You have two goats. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.

PURE COMMUNISM : You have two goats. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

RUSSIAN COMMUNISM : You have two goats. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk.

CAMBODIAN COMMUNISM : You have two goats. The government takes both of them and shoots you.

DICTATORSHIP : You have two goats. The government takes both and drafts you.

PURE DEMOCRACY : You have two goats. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

REPRESENTATIVE DEMOCRACY : You have two goats. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

BUREAUCRACY : You have two goats. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing goats.

PURE ANARCHY : You have two goats. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the goats and kill you.

LIBERTARIAN/ANARCHO-CAPITALISM : You have two goats. You sell one and buy a bull.

SURREALISM : You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take piano lessons.

Politics Explained
Steve Jackson’s version

Another great, funny, cool comedian.

This is the final installment of the 3 triseries on learning from examples of bad online personal responses. If this your first time here, take a look at the first part here, and then the second part here.

7. The Sex Deprived

• i dont think i would fit in too well; both you & the group sound like perfectly decent people- and im not sure if thats really what im looking for. i like a pretty sketchy scene, weird nightclubs, weirder people, all night parties, hard drugs, raves, mindless & casual sex (which seems to be mostly a myth, tho im still looking into it :) , petty criminals etc etc- your group sounds much more, ah, genteel (and saner, of course, i dont particulrly feel like trying to defend my tastes either).

  Petty criminals? Hard drugs? mindless sex? I think he wants to take drugs with shoplifters and screw them in the middle of nowhere.

• Hi I’m a 28 year old prof. white male, 5’10, 175 lbs, athletic build, 4th degree black belt Karate instructor, my last girlfriend wasn’t into sex as much as I was – so I need to have some endurance sex!! I love to 69 all ways.. to have a woman wrap her legs around my neck as I grab both my forearms and burry my head deep inside her wetness! as she jerks my fat (1 3/4″ – 2″ diameter) manhood in her mouth! sorry about the sex introduction, but it’s been a little while and I let my imagination run wild.. :) I hope you don’t think I’m a bid jerk for writing that.. if you want to pursue meeting, I can send a pic if you interested and we can take it from there. I live in NJ, but would travel to see you..

  LOL. I think he was once a lion tamer who enjoyed sticking his head in the lion’s mouth.

• I am a 36 y/o male…who would love to hear you scream my name while we make passionate love… watch the expression on your face while i orally satisfy every fantasy you ever imagined your pussy could handle…I would love to have the priveledge…of teaching you the joy of love making…if your curious please reply…

  LOL. Dude, take a trip down to Amsterdam.

8. The Low Self Esteemed

• Please forgive me for intruding, but I was just wondering if I could humbly request the honor and privilege of corresponding with you, if you wouldn’t at all mind and can find the time. If this is not possible, I honestly and completely understand. Thank you so much for your gracious and patient consideration.

  Sounding like this will only scare people away.

• Hello. Let me introduce myself. This is me in a nut shell. My name is Joe, I am 36, but look a lot younger, 1/4 Irish, 3/4 Italian, hazel eyes, light brown hair, 5’11″. I live in a house I own with my 2 cats and a dog. I have never been married and have no children, but do love kids. I am honest, sensitive, funny, down to earth and just a real nice guy. I enjoy a good conversation, long walks under the moonlight, dining out, movies, being pampered as well as doing the pampering. If I interest you let me know and I will give you my home number so we can have a real conversation. What do you have to lose? If you don’t like what you hear just hang up and no harm done. Lets talk.

  enjoy being pampered? take it slow dude. a good intro smeared.

9. Realistically Unrealistic

• hi who r u

  u r very very very very very nice

  iwont to be firend plz

  agian ur very nice

  u es very very very qute, Iwont to pinch ur cheecks

• You have a warm & most captivating smile. It rivals the sun in radiance…

  How do you feel about long talks about life?
  Saturday at a museum?
  International films?
  Cider & Potato skins?

  When good intros go bad. how is potato skin romantic?

10. Boringly Boring

• are still available to have fun and good time, they said if for good and worse so I take that, let me know your status.

  it’s like each word costs money to type

• would like very much to get to know you. Have pic so if you want to meet write back and lets get to know one another.

  ‘ok’ is the best reply.

Way Too Personal
Lorina’s adventures in the online dating scene

This is the second part of the 3 part dating series on how bad personal ad responses sound like. If this is your first time, you might want to read the first part.

4. ‘Frightening but harmless’

• Hi my name is Alex 29/m/Los Angeles 6’1″ tall with short Brown hair and hazel green eyes. I will send you a pic of me if you would like me to. Call or E-mail me at xxx-xxx-xxxx ChemicalxFreak@___.com I would love to hear from you, your a very beautiful woman. It would be a great pleasure to take you out to dinner sometime in the future.

  ‘chemical freak’? Looks like I’m smarter. I have 2 emails that I alternate with, whole8inches@__.com and molester_24@___.com

• I would like to see how great of a graphic artist you are. You send me some pictures of you and I have to guess whether they are real or not. I will do the same as soon as I get a picture of me scanned. If interested, reply back. I am not really looking for a relationship, just some on-line fun for the time being.

  What? He’s gonna get 4 pictures of ‘the finger’ face up, down, left and right.

• Hi there ..seems like ur wait is over! ’cause I got curious on your profile. Well girls have found me a real macho! but I care a lot for intelligence and honesty! but you you’ve got to see yourself as opinions are benign! My vitals – Male, a Consultant, 26yrs – 6ft. Write to me at ________@usa.net with your proper mailid and we will carry on from there. But speed is important to me as is confidence, in the reply too! Take care and have a great day or night, depending on when u open this..

  ‘ur wait is over’. The pizza you ordered is here. ‘Yea bro, u got it rite~’

5. Childish Syndrome

• my sense of humor is rather warped so is you face id f*ck you but i wouldend know which end to stick it in

  No comments.

• With all due respect, Attractive, Intelligent, and Creative is a little on the unlikely side. Attractive people (I mean model attractive) usually don’t have personalities because they get everything based on their looks. In other words, don’t hold your breath on that one.

  Only losers bash another person to gain self esteem.

• How are you? Wow, you sure sound like you know what to write in theads and all. But I hope that your ad was not to sound like you have a bighead. Because it sure sounds like you are. But I am sure that you are not. :-) So what’s this crap about how people think you are goth becuase you look pale? There are women in Florida that are more pale than you look. Anyways,I am not making any sense right now becuase of the recent hurricane Floyd fiasco.

  Talk to you soon.. I have some pics if you want some..

  ‘bighead’? It’s pretty dumb to insult and then cover it later with flattery.

6. Missing The Point

• I am a photographer and looking for people to model for me. PLease click the blue link under sender’s profile to see my ad and then reply or call
  xxx-xxx-xxxx if you are interested…

  Dion

  People join online personals for dating purposes, not to find modeling opportunities.

• I just have to say I am absoulutely amazed at your ad. I would have wrote the same exact ad aside from being female and your personal things. I moved out to So-Cal about a year and a half ago and I too had that special someone however things didnt really work out like they were supposed to (do they ever?) Anyway I have met a lot of people and made a lot of friendships. You seem like a really nice person and thats an admirable quality out here. I am from back East and I am definately different minded then most of the freaks (oops I mean people out here) Thats not to say I dont enjoy watching them its kind of fun. But anyway I definately enjoy the things you do and would like to have a simple friendship and explore LA(since I havent had that much of a chance to). A little about me Im 6’0 tall, 25 y.o., athletic build, 185 lbs., and Im told Im very attractive in the all american type look (however I dont have that sexy LA bad boy look). So write me back if you are interested and we can go from there. By they way its funny but I too was in awe of the beauty I saw on the drive out here.

  What? Mistress hunting?

• hi =)

  i saw your ad and i think you’re very pretty

  i am a male film student, i own a digital motion camera, and i want to film a gonzo adult film, which is girls having sex, while clothed guys are there for comedy

  i already have two other pretty girls interested in working with me, and i think you’d make a great addition

  so i am offering to write, direct, and film you in an adult feature, based in the l.a. area

  please write back =)

  Clothed guys watching girls have sex? You must be kidding me. LOL

The internet personals dating scene is an online dating system that allows individuals, couples and groups to meet online and possibly develop a romantic or sexual relationship. Generally people get to provide personal information, photos of themselves, then search for other individuals using criteria such as age range, gender and location.

With huge free sites like match.com and Yahoo personals, many people have taken the match making scene online. The advantage lies in the mutual environment that online dating sites provide. Who you want to make contact with is up to you. You get to view others’ profile, and they get to view yours. If they like you, they’ll reply. Same goes vice versa. But the thing is, how do you pull it off without sounding like a tasteless, boring weirdo?

Easy. Learn from experience. Rather it be others’ than yours. Below are 3 of 10 categorized examples of how a failure’s reply sound like.

Disgusting

• I have a breast fantasy I would love to live out with you, i am willing to pay you to help make it come true, I’m a single white male 5’9″ 150lbs good looking.

  Dude, all you need is a lifetime subscription of ‘Girls Gone Wild’ and a bottle of KY jelly.

• I am so impressed with you in many ways..the mind which you contain..the subtle curves of your body which is very sexy..and the coy look on your girlish face which I have such an urge to kiss.

  I would be more relaxed just discussing the comments you’re receiving from your personal and the demands of your website as I feel it will be very popular. I will tell you more about myself when I’m sure you have received this email and I see how often you reply. I will send a picture with any replies you offer. I will answer any question or try and supply any wishes you have, no bother to me as to how personal.

  I feel that personal and intimate interaction is so stimulating..Would you like to join an exhibitionist maillist group here in ft worth/texas? I can send you the information if you wish.

  Enraptured,Robg

  Reply so that I know it’s safe to send my picture

  Guys, this is how it goes. Scour profiles. Write to interested ones, giving only as much info as her profile offers. On the other side, she’ll check her responses and reply if she’s interested. There, simple as drinking water.

• I AM SINGLE. ATTRACTIVE AND 27 Y/O

  YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL, HAVE GREAT EYES AND SEEM INTERESTING….

  WELL E-MAIL ME AND WE CAN GO ON FROM THERE..

  BY THE WAY, I LOVE WOMEN IN SHORT SKIRTS, THIGH HIGH STOCKINGS, SUPER HIGH HEELS, MAKES ME THE REAL MAN-!!!!!!

  8 INCHES OF R E A L MAN–!!!!!!!!!!!!

  LOL. You must be Ben Dover. You should be looking for Ilean Dover.

What the..??

• Now i wonder you so when i read message yours which express all my thinks in my mind Realy i;am here for your rsquest i want you To be with me here in cairo ,EG. thus i send You as you want why am i write to you i think if you like to know me more i’ll be ready to send you the costs to bring here I want you be serious in your talking and as You did as sorry i forget to know you by my self i’am egyptian man work in the field of medicine and my profissional is chemist so I’ve a part-time to be good friends not for fun only but all our wishs in the life.now We hope to start.

  Oh Lord, may this profissional be less confissinal.

• Wow I can see that u hold a lot gall. Well lets see, u r nice fram what i read and u looking for that right person Well perhaps u had recieved many emails, but I think i believe in meeting couse if we share thoughts we maid become great partnes. Ill sent u my pic after u reply

  fram what i read, u need many lasens to brus up u englis couse u maid risk be singel 4 life

• HI MY NAME IS JOE AND I AM FROM CHESNUT H-ILL PHILY I AM 6’2″ 29 YR OLD SHORT BLACK HAIR BR EYES JEWISH GAY175 LB I WOULD LIKE VERY MACH TO TO TO YOU BY E-MAIL I ALMOST DOING THE SAME JOB YOU DO I AM AN AUTO CAD DESIGN I AM ORIGIANLY FROM ISRAEL LIVING HERE ALREADY 7 YR SO PLEASE IF YOU WONT TO E-MAIL ME BACK AT *_____@___.COM THIS IS MY WORK ADDRESS OR AT HOME WICH WOULD BE BETER EVEN BECAUSE OVER AT HOME I HAVE MY PIC SO I WILL BE ABALE TO SEND IT TO YOU SO _____@___.COM SO SEE YOU LATER BYE AND HAVE A GOOD DAY.

  Gay? Jewish gay at 175 pounds? You know, you don’t have to to to put _____@___.COM to get an email.

Too Much To Handle

• Hi my name is dean. i’ve been writing to these adds and I never got A response from any of these adds.Are you going to answer my add back.I’m getting A scanner it is on order at sear.I will send you a pic when I get it could you write me back until I send you A pic.I’m A nice guy but I’m shy until I get to know someone.I like going to the pool,movies driven are best.I haven’t been to a driven in a long time.I like playing on the computer.I’m learning abuot the computer as I go.

  Desperate = no reply. Include everything before answering ads.

• Just waisting time and saw how much alike we might be, sick and twisted sense of humor..ect. I am a wee bit older than what you specified in your post, but if all you wanna do is email….. well is that such a big deal? You can find a picture and a little about me at my site.

  Schmookipus

  Schmookipus???? LOL!!!!!!!!!! sexyfroggy? huggiewoof?

• I do fit your bill, to the tee, minus 1 thing. I’m into all cartoons (basically) and dig your humor, but am also in need of a physical and emotional relationship. Nice pic.

  im a design engineer full time, bartender part-time, if you want i’d like to hangout sometime.

  In need of a relationship? (error buzzer goes off) *buzzzzzzzzz…* Yes, you need oxygen, you need food, you need water but NOT a relationship.

Way Too Personal
Lorina’s adventures in the online dating scene

Thomas Alva Edison once said, ‘Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration’. What he meant to say is that nothing in this world comes for free. All of us are geniuses, just that not all of us are at 99%. Here are 8 common habits adaptable by anyone who has a brain.

Look

To get over a problem, understanding it is important. The easiest way is to break the problem down and look at it through different angles. Come up with ways, perspectives that may not be heard of before. For example, I use the computer everyday.

My problem was pain in my right wrist. I am a right hander, therefore it is natural to use the mouse on the right hand. However, I do a lot of surfing and picture editing, 2 activities which includes a lot of clicks and mouse movement. For the first few months, I couldn’t come up with a solution to it. Then it struck me. I switched hands. It took me a few weeks to get used to the left hand. But once it became normal, I stuck to it. Somehow, my entire left hand moves along during mouse movements, minimizing the usage of wrists. That made my right hand pretty happy. =)

Imagine

Once, Albert Einstein was asked this question, ‘If you had only 1 hour to save the world, what would you do?’. His answer was, ‘I’ll use 55 minutes to think, 5 minutes to act’. Cool. He always found it necessary to formulate his subject in as many different ways as possible, including using diagrams. He visualized solutions, and believed that words and numbers as such did not play a significant role in his thinking process.

Productivity

Thomas Alva Edison failed hundreds and hundreds of times before achieving success. Did you know that he had a whopping 1,093 patents? His assistants were given idea quotas to ensure productivity. Dean Keith Simonton of University of California studied 2,036 timeless scientists and found that the most highly acclaimed ones produced not only amazingly useful products, but also many amazingly useless ones. The thing was, they braved through failure to arrive at excellence.

Mix And Match

Darren Rowse of problogger.net, was the first few bloggers to come up with making money online with blogs. Was he scared? Yes, he was. At the time when everyone was blogging out personal matters, he came up with the idea of blogging for money. What a cool idea.

Grego Mendel, an Austrian monk, combined maths and biology to create the base of the law of heredity. This new universal law came from his innovativeness of mixing 2 minimumly related subjects.

Relating The Unrelated

Da Vinci forced a relationship between the sound of a bell and a stone hitting water that enabled him to make the connection that sound travels in waves.

Samuel Morse invented relay stations for telegraphic signals when observing relay stations for horses.

Resembling Separate Things

Explaining through unrelated things like how Einstein used simplicity to explain his theories. Aristotle considered metaphor a sign of genius, and believed that the individual who had the capacity to perceive resemblances between two separate areas of existence and link them together was a person of special gifts.

For example, here’s a simple explanation of Newton’s second law.
If a truck hits a car, the car moves forward.
The truck provides the force, the car is the mass, and the acceleration is how quickly the car (mass) moves forward.
The larger and heavier the car (mass) is, the more force it takes to move it.
If the car is very light, it will move forward quicker than if the car is very heavy.
Thus, force = mass X acceleration

Luck

Luck = preparation + opportunity

For example, if there’s an opening for an accountancy job, it’s an opportunity. However, I am an IT graduate and can’t answer the advert. I could, if the opportunity was for IT related.

The first principle of creative accident says that failure can only be productive if we do not focus on it as an unproductive result. The question should not be “Why have I failed?”, but rather “What have I done?”.

It’s kind of hard to keep track of ALL the things we need to do. I forget to do many things, all the time. These include repeated responsibilities like household chores, personal resolutions and planned activities.

The top 10 things that I forget most often are :

1. Birthdays before it’s too late
2. Washing, hanging and keeping my clothes before I sleep
3. Close the windows downstairs before going to sleep
4. Wash the dishes after I go out
5. Clean the air cond filter monthly
6. Daily deadlines for writing posts
7. Where I left my glasses, wallet, watch, phone
8. Feed my dog
9. Draw money from the ATM when I’m out
10. Forgetting to buy out of stock toiletries until I need to use it again

Thanks to mySociety.org, I can now set up reminders or as they call it ‘hassles’, to send to myself in the form of an email on intervals specified by me. This simple application is useful to people who read their mails everyday, like me. All that an user need to do to get things rolling is approve the confirmation email that is sent. You can even choose to have the ‘hassle’ publicly visible to other users who might find it useful. It might get listed in the popular hassles section.

I’ll be waiting for them to implement the application through instant messengers like Yahoo!, MSN and GTalk. Other notable future features include being more time specific, like in hours, days, weeks and months. However, their current daily reminder is already enough for me to get more things done.

HassleMe
Sometimes in life, you just need to be nagged

I like to go on trips to new places. I think most people do. I enjoy camping trips, snorkeling in clear as crystal waters, trying out new food and learning about different cultures. Anyways, here are several things that we ought to do before going on vacations like :

1. Make sure the dishes are washed
2. Shaving
3. Get someone proper to temporarily care for your child (if it is left behind) or pet.
4. Confirm airline tickets
5. Get airmiles in advance
6. If you haven’t, call the airline and ask for good seats and kids meals
7. Memorize PIN codes to all credit cards
8. Call your credit card company and notify them about your trip overseas in order to prevent possible freezing.
9. Check out the hospitals that are covered by your health insurance
10. Get travel insurance
11. Change money
12. Install or recharge batteries
13. Get maps
14. Check that the passport and visas are in order
15. Get photocopies of passport and other important documents
16. Get a vaccination certificate if you have to
17. Carry the insurance certificate (Health Insurance card)or get an official paper from your local social insurance office
18. Bring along your driver’s license, ID card, address list (with phone numbers and email addresses)
19. Also the International Student Identification Card (ISIC) if you have one
20. Dive certificate (if you’re going on a diving trip)
21. On the day itself, double check the wallet, airline tickets, boat tickets, bus tickets
22. Bring both small and large scale map if you have to
23. Guidebook
24. Bring along a serviette or matchbox of your hotel, in case you get lost
25. Check your embassy’s contact

1. Start training your puppy early on. While old dogs can be taught new tricks, what’s learned earliest, is often learned quickest and easiest. Moreover, the older the dog, the more bad habits will likely need to be “un-learned”. When it comes to raising and training a dog, an ounce of problem prevention is certainly worth a pound of cure!




2. Train your dog gently and humanely, and whenever possible, teach him using positive, motivational methods. Keep obedience sessions upbeat so that the training process is enjoyable for all parties involved. If training your pooch is a drudgery, rev things up a bit, and try the “playtraining” approach: incorporate constructive, non-adversarial games (such as “Go Find”, “Hide ‘n’ Seek”, retrieving, etc.) into your training sessions.




3. Does your dog treat you like “hired help” at home? Does he treat you like a human gymnasium when you’re sitting on the furniture? Does he beg at the table? Jump up on visitors? Demand your attention by annoying you to death? Ignore your commands? How well your dog responds to you at home affects his behavior outdoors as well. If your dog doesn’t respond reliably to commands at home (where distractions are relatively minimal), he certainly won’t respond to you properly outdoors where he’s tempted by other dogs, pigeons, passersby, sidewalk food scraps, etc.




4. Avoid giving your dog commands that you know you cannot enforce. Every time you give a command that is neither complied with nor enforced your dog learns that commands are optional.




5. One command should equal one response, so give your dog only one command (twice max!), then gently enforce it. Repeating commands tunes your dog out (as does nagging) and teaches your dog that the first several commands are a “bluff ‘. For instance, telling your dog to “Sit, sit, sit, sit!”, is neither an efficient nor effective way to issue commands. Simply give your dog a single “Sit” command and gently place or lure your dog into the sit position, then praise/reward.




6. Avoid giving your dog combined commands which are incompatible. Combined commands such as “sit-down” can confuse your dog. Using this example, say either “sit” or “down”. The command “sit-down” simply doesn’t exist.




7. When giving your dog a command, avoid using a loud voice. Even if your dog is especially independent/unresponsive, your tone of voice when issuing an obedience command such as “sit”,”down” or “”stay”, should be calm and authoritative, rather than harsh or loud.

   NOTE: Many owners complain that their dogs are “stubborn”, and that they “refuse to listen” when given a command. Before blaming the dog when he doesn’t respond to a command, one must determine whether or not: a) the dog knows what the owner wants, b) he knows how to comply, c) he is not simply being unresponsive due to fear, stress or confusion.




8. Whenever possible, use your dog’s name positively, rather than using it in conjunction to reprimands, warnings or punishment. Your dog should trust that when it hears its name or is called to you, good things happen. His name should always be a word he responds to with enthusiasm, never hesitancy or fear.




9. Correct or, better yet, prevent the (mis)behavior, don’t punish the dog. Teaching and communication is what it’s all about, not getting even with your dog. If you’re taking an “it’s-you-against-your dog, whip ‘em into shape” approach, you’ll undermine your relationship, while missing out on all the fun that a motivational training approach can offer. Additionally, after-the-fact discipline does NOT work.




10. When training one’s dog, whether praising or correcting, good timing is essential. Take the following example: You’ve prepared a platter of hors d’oeuvres for a small dinner party, which you’ve left on your kitchen counter. Your dog walks into the room and smells the hors d’oeuvres. He air-sniffs, then eyes the food, and is poised to jump up. This is the best, easiest and most effective time to correct your dog: before he’s misbehaved, while he’s thinking about jumping up to get the food.




11. Often, dog owners inadvertently reinforce their dogs’ misbehavior, by giving their dogs lots of attention (albeit negative attention) when they misbehave. Needless to say, if your dog receives lots of attention and handling when he jumps up on you, that behavior is being reinforced, and is therefor likely to be repeated.




12. Keep a lid on your anger. Never train your dog when you’re feeling grouchy or impatient. Earning your dog’s respect is never accomplished by yelling, hitting, or handling your dog in a harsh manner. Moreover, studies have shown that fear and stress inhibit the learning process.

Train Your Dog Correctly
Tips for a well behaved dog

Bathtubs, bathtubs. Imagine yourself coming home after a long day’s work, feeling tired and stressed out. Imagine your favourite bathtub waiting for you to sink your restless body into it. Imagine sipping on your favourite fruit juice with your eyes closed and your soul unwinding to the smooth jazz playing in the background. Doesn’t it feel great? Well, it does feel great for me. I would wanna get myself one of these designer bathtubs.

Lasco Radius

Teuco

Duravit

Bainultra

Diamond Spas

Agape UFO

Kohler Sok

Jason International

Ideal Standard

KOS Kaos

Hoesch Foster

Vita Bath

Victoria and Albert Napoli

Heritage Bathrooms

Wet Style

Stone Forest

Troy Adams Design

Recently, I’ve been bugged by telemarketers of Celebrity Fitness, a local gym. I’m not sure how they got my number, but they got my number. Sometimes they don’t really understand the meaning of ‘not interested’. Other telemarketers are smart enough to start the conversation by announcing that I’ve just won a prize. It’s either a product or a holiday package. The requirement is usually my details or either I have to go collect the prize from their office.

Whatever it is, I realized the importance of my rights. I don’t want to give out my details only to find out that it’s been sold to other telemarketing firms. Here are 8 questions to ask if you smell something fishy going on.

1. Identification

• Are you calling to sell something? maybe a product or service?
• Is this a telemarketing call?

2. Get the details

• Could you tell me your full name please?
• And also your phone number?
• What’s the name of the organization you’re calling for?

3. Prevention

• Does that organization keep a list of numbers it’s been asked not to call?
• I would like my number(s) put on that list. Can you take care of that now?
• And does the company you work for also make telemarketing calls for any other organizations? (If yes) Can you make sure your company won’t call me for any other organization?

All you need to do is just remember the 3 step process every time you get that call. Identify the nature of the call, get the telemarketer’s detail and prevent yourself from any other related junk calls. TRY to talk as nicely as you can. If you feel cheeky, you can always make things interesting by playing a prank.

Junk Busters
Keep your life peaceful and free

In a Tokyo Hotel:
Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a
person to do such thing is please not to read notis.

In a Bucharest hotel lobby:
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we
regret that you will be unbearable.

In a Leipzig elevator:
Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.

In a Belgrade hotel elevator:
To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin
should enter more persons, each one should press a number of
wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by
national order.

In a Paris hotel elevator:
Please leave your values at the front desk.

In a hotel in Athens:

Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the
hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.

In a Yugoslavian hotel:
The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the
chambermaid.

In a Japanese hotel:
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox
monastery:
You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and
Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except
Thursday.

In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers:
Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the
boots of ascension.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

On the menu of a Polish hotel:
Salad a firm’s own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy
dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose;
beef rashers beaten up in the country people’s fashion.

Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop:
Ladies may have a fit upstairs.

In a Bangkok dry cleaner’s:
Drop your trousers here for best results.

Outside a Paris dress shop:
Dresses for street walking.

In a Rhodes tailor shop:
Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute
customers in strict rotation.

Similarly, from the Soviet Weekly:
There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts by 15,000 Soviet
Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the
past two years.

A sign posted in Germany’s Black forest:
It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that
people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live
together in one tent unless they are married with each other
for that purpose.

In a Zurich hotel:
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the
opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be
used for this purpose.

In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:

Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

In a Rome laundry:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having
a good time.

In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency:
Take one of our horse-driven city tours – we guarantee no
miscarriages.

Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand:
Would you like to ride on your own ass?

In a Swiss mountain inn:
Special today — no ice cream.

In a Bangkok temple:
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed
as a man.

In a Tokyo bar:
Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

In a Copenhagen airline ticket office:

We take your bags and send them in all directions.

On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to
it.

In a Norwegian cocktail lounge:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

In a Budapest zoo:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable
food, give it to the guard on duty.

In the office of a Roman doctor:
Specialist in women and other diseases.

In an Acapulco hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

In a Tokyo shop:
Our nylons cost more than common, but you’ll find they are
best in the long run.

From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner:
Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your
room, please control yourself.

From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo:
When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn.
Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles
your passage then tootle him with vigor.

Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance:
- English well talking.
- Here speeching American.

Laugh Along With GNU
Providing laughs to the working hackers

If you ever did have the thought of going for plastic surgery, beware as the pictures below will change your mind. Do know that plastic surgery is an unnatural way to look better. It only provides temporary self satisfaction, and you may not like the outcome.

Lex Baldwin



From the picture, it’s obvious that Lex Baldwin was a sexy Latino guy. Look at what happens to him when he goes for a nose job, brow lift and nose surgery.

Donatella Versace



The world’s top designer. Her face changed a lot after a nose job and lip alteration.

Courtney love



As if she wasn’t already pretty enough, she went under the knife for her eyes and nose.

Mickey Rourke.



Face lifts can do that to your hairline.

Kate Jackson



What a brow lift!

Christie Brinkley



Looking surprised forever.

Vivica Fox



The chin, cheeks, lips, eyelids, facelift and browjob took away her cuteness.



Look at the deformed breasts.

Victoria Silverstedt



Do you think that the 1997 Playmate of the Year needed to enlarge her lips?

Pamela Anderson



She had really nice, suitable lips before.

Mia Farrow



Spotted the difference? Cheek implants, face lift and eyelift.