In different situation, a man going out / travel more than the woman and leave a wife alone at home for many days  makes the her feel alone & lonely and start looking for other relationship and the husband which travel a lot also might looking for a partner or worst if he’s working with a woman. Ermmm….. the consequences are hard to determine when things go wrong. Either want to blame a guy because work too hard or a woman because not loyal to the husband. Anyway, a couple has their own responsibility to the relationship to make it work. However, women can fit to men lives easily but does man can fit into their lives? Find out the reasons for broken relationship and what the solution to it.

Fix It #1 Time Together

It used to be he spends too much time with his friends at the pub watching football. But as for you, now you’re headed for Happy Hours at the office café for the third time this week. What happens here is a woman become more successful than a man at work places, it becomes more necessary to share after-hours rituals – as men do – with their office buddies to build up relationships. It’s all part of being a career girl, and most men understand that. But if you chat about stressful sales targets and bald vice presidents after office hours three days in a row and leave him with nothing, but returns on TV and a Coke at home, he’s bound to start thinking of other ways to spend his time.

Normally women used to nag to get their men to come home earlier. However, guys they’re more liable to just find something else to do such as hang up with friends. A busy social life is a sign of success, but not all men want their partners to be successful. Some studies show that successful men are looking for traditional, stay-at home wives. Few girls think that their partner is not part of their work & social life make them tempted to start looking for someone who will. Men feel more appreciated if they’re invited to some of get-together party more often but women think it is not a good idea as they can maintain their professional with the colleagues without a partner. Ermmm….

So, how you want to fix this situation so that both of you can be together? The only way out of this deadlock is to meet half-way. Explain to him that the office gatherings are opportunities to hobnob or make your professional presence felt, and are important for your career progression. On the other hand, if you’re serious in your relationship, you have to spend time together – the very definition of the word “relationship” demands it. So, tell him you want to spend time with him also and be sure to do so.

Fix It #2 Intelligent Conversations

Every time you want to start to conversation, you have to think or sometimes have to study first what is the most intelligent conversation you can bring out as all the time the only thing you could talk to men about grocery shopping lists. And when you start to think about other topic (more sophisticated), you just out of idea as you were afraid he will think that you’re trying to test his knowledge or challenging him. Well, maybe he will ignore you. Actually women are more educated than they use to be. And smarter women are naturally going to demand smarter, more sophisticated conversation. So, when women want to discuss current issues with poorly-read men, they feel more than a little embarrassed – they are mortified. When your men start to think that you will be able to outsmart him at everything, then it is dangerous for your relationship. How you want to fix this?

If you know that his knowledge in certain areas is weak, try not to be tempted to demonstrate your superiority by teasing him. Remember, if the conversations turn towards something you’re not so familiar with, such as football or his favorite’s band, he would be whipping you   instead! Maybe as a couple you should try to stick to common ground in conversations. That way, no one is ever inferior to the other and everything is a lot more pleasant.

Fix It #3 Baby Matters

Who should decide when both of you can have a baby? If before he will jogs to 7-Eleven to pick up a pack of Durex when the weekend rolls around. But now, seems like you schedule IUD replacements with your gynae every few years. Why?

Nowadays, most of women less excited about having babies than they used to be. Babies deal severe stumbling blocks to career progression, greatly affect your investment planning and force you to practically give up your old social circle for a new one made up of mothers and their screaming toddlers – not exactly positive motivation to undergo nine months of pregnancy and hours of painful labour.

Apart of your own concern, your man also thinks about his biological clock which may explain why he’s trying to get you pregnant all of a sudden. They worry because according to study, as men age, the amount and quality of their sperm decline and this translates into a lower chance that any particular act of unprotected sex will lead to pregnancy. What’s more, men are also worried about when they have children due to many reasons.

Well, if he wants too he can’t have a baby without you, that’s for sure. But if he’s willing to take on postnatal responsibility and you can find it in your heart to take on the prenatal tasks, then why not? Yes, it means going through pregnancy and the rigours of childbirth, but it still makes it worth it. The real question to ask here is: “Who has a better paying job?” And if you can answer the question, then the decision is yours.

Fix It #4 Trophy Partners

It used to be…You are his pride and joy….and possession. But you want him to look nice, smell good, sound smooth, feel great and be gentle …all the time.

This called Trophy Phenomenon, and nowadays women are as demanding as men when it comes to how they expect their partners to look. It partly explains why apparently one third of women in the US are dating younger men – because they have not yet developed unsightly paunches, bald spots or bad teeth.

Men have always wanted their partners to be the envy of their peers, but women are catching on. You’re calling more of the shots in your relationships, and this means being able to make more demands on your partners…including how they look, smell and behave in public. Under the old rules, only women cared about how they looked. Physical appearance mattered because there was the constant threat of being dumped for a younger, perlier set of chops. It was a time when women to great lengths to ensure that they remained desirable in their partner’s eyes.

Not so anymore. In fact, one can say the tables have turned. Today, most women don’t need men’s money, so in order to remain consistently attractive to them they’ve got to take care of looks. Naturally, not all these guys take well to new demands on their appearances, fitness level and behavior. Which is why some men have decided to be rather particular about how they are treated in a relationship – they don’t want to be trophy husbands.

For years, women have been fighting to be treated as equals. But now that they’ve got what they want, it seems that they are starting to make the same mistakes that men did…such as claiming “ownership” over their partners, dictating what they must do and how they should behave in order to stay in a relationship with them. Don’t do that.

Fix It #5 Bedroom Positions

It used to be, he says: “Now, bend over…” But now…she says: “Now, go lower…” When women become powerful as men, women are more likely to act like men in bed, that is, to take control and actively seek pleasure. Although this movement has been slow and has only just begun, women are more willing to take responsibility for sex, initiate it, and choosing specific sexual activities such as wider variety of acts.

Your new assertiveness is threatening men’s traditional role as the dominant partner during sex. But for some men, this threat may register subconsciously at other levels of the relationship – they may feel that their power base, whether real or imagined, in the relationship as a whole is under threat, too. Add to the pressure to consistently deliver the fabled “multi-orgasms” and you see why men are apt to feel a little nervous when faced with a sexually demanding woman. It’s not that men’s don’t like it, mind. It’s just a little confusing: They’re grappling with learning to take instructions instead of just giving them. The complete shift in responsibility can alarm less-than prepared men.

To fix the problem, the best way is don’t hog the Director’s Chair. Share the responsibility of your sexual fulfillment between the two of you. This can work by either taking turns as the dominant partner each time you have sex, or by working towards a happy medium of partnership that involves making suggestions instead of giving instructions. You can move from ‘You do this and I’ll do this’ to ‘Shall we try this?’ That way, you’ll stimulate ideas and keep it interesting. You might try and fail but you’ll be happy with the process and the results as both of you are working together.

And that should be more than enough reason to give this power sharing process a go.

You can use the following ploys to get him to reveal his inner self. Be prepared though, he might want to turn the tables on you to make sure he’s got a handle on where you’re coming from too!

Game #1 Staring to face game

This game will reveals how he deals with emotions. Sit face to face and stare directly into each other eyes. No matter how you feel don’t look away (you may need to think about your pet cat dying to ensure that you don’t just fall into a giggling heap). Note his responses.

Try to understand what he’s really telling you. If he laughs in an embarrassed way and can’t maintain eye contact, this indicates that being emotionally open makes him feel vulnerable and silly. If he looks away repeatedly or doesn’t want to continue staring, he feels extremely uncomfortable dealing with emotions and talking about his feelings in any way. If he looks at you with intensity and has no trouble maintaining eye contact, he is obviously very at home with his emotions and yours, and is the kind of guy who can not only say “I love you” but can  identify what he is feeling rather than deny it. If you found he was type number three, don’t look back anymore, yeee…..he’s the guy!

Game #2 HIGH ANXIETY GAME

This game will reveals how he manages stress. You can pose him this question: Which situation would make you feel the most uncomfortable / anxious?

a) Being stuck in an elevator with a stranger?

b) Breaking down on a deserted road?

c) Sitting beside friends at a dinner party while they keep arguing all night?

Concentrate on what he’s going to answer you. How he answers this question indicates not only how he copes with not only unexpected situations but also which kind of life events he feels most equipped to deal with.

a) If the elevator option is the one that would bother him the most he obviously feels a little uncomfortable about confined spaces and doesn’t like being under circumstances out of his control. He’s most likely the kind of person who feels a little uneasy in social situations, finds it hard to strike up conversation at parties and takes a long while getting to know someone before he feels he can relax and be himself.

b) If breaking down on a deserted road would stress him the most your guy is obviously not someone who feels comfortable with risk-taking or with situations that are on the edge. He doesn’t like to dominate or take the lead and tends to approach something he has never tried before with anxiety rather than viewing it as a challenge. This means that he misses out on some experiences and opportunities because he’s too busy playing it safe. On the upside though, he never gets himself into trouble by losing his head then regretting it the morning after.

c) The friend arguing scenario as his first choice shows that he’s a little uncomfortable facing emotions and that having to do so can sometimes leave him feeling awkward or embarrassed. In your relationship this might at times manifest as an inability to say he loves you even though he does or he may tend to shut off and withdraw when something is wrong rather than talking openly and honestly about his feeling.

Game #3 MOVIE STAR GAME

This game can reveals what he values in a woman. You can ask him which Hollywood sirens he think is the most attractive and why? There are:

a) Angelina Jolie

b) Jennifer Aniston

c) Lindsay Lohan

d) Scarlett Johansson

If his choice is Angelina Jolie meaning that he likes a woman who is passionate about her beliefs and independence. If he chooses Jennifer Aniston, he wants a partner who’s fun, sensitive and loyal. And if he selects Lindsay Lohan, he prefers women who are wild and unpredictable turns him on. At the other hand, if he likes Scarlett Johansson, he thinks it’s alluring when a woman is both mysterious and stylish.

Fuhhhh…It could be difficult for you if you none of them type, right? Anyway you can straight away ask him, does you a type he likes because the answer should be YES. If not, he won’t selecting you at the first place, right?

Game #4 finders – keepers game

If you want to know how honest he is, this is the perfect way. Put him in one situation where he has just seen a person who was walking ahead of him drop RM 50 note. Would he:

a) Call out so they stop and race over to hand it to them immediately.

b) Wait to see if they realize, then look around to see if anyone else noticed. If they did he would give the money back to the person who dropped it. If they didn’t he would hold on to it for himself.

c) Let them look away so that he can grab the money and put it in his wallet.

If he choose to act as sentence a), meaning he’s a very honest person who you could trust to do the right thing in every situation. He would never cheat on you because he would feel too guilty and would never badmouth you to his friends. If b) is the right action for him, he mostly does the right thing but is sometimes torn between what he knows he should do and pushing the boundary a little bit just to get a small taste of what it’s like to live on the edge. Sometimes, he might flirt with a girl at a party just to enjoy the thrill of it. It’s not a good news if he choose c) as an action. This is because can say that he’s not the most trustworthy guy and tends to make his own decisions without worrying about what other people think is right and wrong. He can be quite tunnel-visioned if he wants something and will go all out to get it, often without realizing how that affects people around him. He would be vulnerable to getting tipsy and going home with another woman if you weren’t there. Beware!!!!

Game #5 the lottery game

If you want to reveal either he approach to money and saving, try this game out. If he won’t RM50,000 dollars what would he do with it? Here are some choices to make:

a) Blow it on a huge spending spree buying things like a new stereo / computer / mountain bike / electric guitar / play station 3?

b) Use it as a down payment towards a house.

c) Spend half of it on a holiday and save the other half in the bank.

If he goes to choice a), it’s telling you that he’s a bit of a spendthrift and wants to find a way to make money quickly and easily without having to work hard for it. That means that he’s not always cautious enough to save money and he has a tendency to run out of money before his next paycheck comes in. If he choose to take action as b), meaning that he’s a practical and organized person – the kind of guy who will only blow big bugs on something if he really needs it and he’s thoroughly researched what he’s buying. He’s a good saver because he has financial plans for the future such as buying a house or going on a big holiday.

If c) is the choice, he knows how to enjoy his money but he also knows the value of squirreling money away. So, although he might splash out on a new jacket or expensive birthday present for you – he balances that out by knowing how much he needs to put aside for all his bills so that he never runs short.

Game #6 CHOOSE A CAR COLOR GAME

If you like to try this game, it could reveal his personality and nature. Ask him to answer this question: If he could go out right now and buy a brand spanking new car, what color would he choose? The color that he’s going to choose reveals whether he’s an extrovert or introvert and what he’s like in bed.

Red color: He’s somebody gregarious, likes to have a good time, enjoys socializing and has a high libido. You will find him an enthusiastic person to be around but every now and then you might have to pull him up for flirting and might wish he would slow down so that you can enjoy some more romantic time together. He loves to try new things in the bedroom to spice up your sex life.

Black color: He’s kind of guy who likes to maintain a little mystery about himself to keep people around him guessing and thinking he’s interesting. This means he tends to sit back and take everything in and often doesn’t reveal about himself to others – sometimes even to close mates. It’s not because he’s shy – in fact he is quietly confident, knows what he likes and what he wants and is noticeable masculine without being aggressive. At times this means he can be a little opinionated and put his own needs first. In bed he loves to tease you until you are fantastically aroused.

Silver color: He’s kind of person values possessions and loves to make romantic gestures like buying you flowers or organizing a picnic or sunset. You will never have to nag him about dressing up to go out and will always feel that he is looking for you – but sometimes you might have to stand your ground to remind him that you’re capable of making your own decisions without checking his opinion first. He loves having spontaneous sex in places like stairwells or on moonlit beaches.

White color: He likes things simple and uncomplicated and because of that you always know where you stand with him. He’s the kind of person who is very self-disciplined and reliable and will always turn up on time to take you out or say the right thing to your friends. Every now and then though, you might wish he would loosen up, let his hair down and stop taking everything so seriously. Sometimes in the bedroom it would be nice if he let his guard down a bit more and got really passionate.

Blue color: He’s even-tempered and quite spiritual so he has wonderfully close relationships with people and has no problem expressing how he feels about anything and everything. He likes to get out of the city whenever he can because he loves feeling he’s amongst nature. He’s not big on possessions and believes that its being a good person and being intimate with those close to you that brings happiness in life. Because of this he’s a very thoughtful lover.

Yellow color: If he likes yellow color, he’s usually in a good mood and if he has a rough day, he never feels down for long. He loves having a laugh and likes to play practical jokes or do things like start a conga line at a party. He can be a little disorganized and sometimes jumps in to things without thinking fully of the consequences. He likes to spend a lot of time with his mates and that makes you feel like sometimes you have to fight to get his attention. In bed he’s sometimes loud and gets very excited – so sex often energetic.

Green color: He’s an intelligent guy and a deep thinker. He has lots of integrity so he would never knowingly do anything to hurt you and he likes to see the good in people around him. He can be quietly determined about something he really wants to do and thinks ahead because he has firm plans for how to improve his life. In bed he always give you lots of time and attention to make sure you get as much pleasure as he does.

Brown color: He doesn’t like to stand out in any way so he insists you always arrive at parties once things are underway. He refuses to be dragged on to the dance floor and you have to really encourage him to do things like go for a promotion at work. Deep down he is quite a sensitive person. Sometimes his shyness and inability to be spontaneous make you a little frustrated – because he values his privacy, he often want to kick back at home while you want to go out party. But he’s a genuine person who tries to do the right thing. In the bedroom he tends to let you take the lead.

Game #7 Commitment game

This game will show either he’s a stayer or a stray-er. This is considering a bonus question to all guys out there. Ask him to describe what he would like to be doing in five years’ time. This will telling you whether he’s long-term material or just with you for a short ride.

Settling Down: If he talks about hopefully being in a committed relationship and buying a flat, then he’s obviously not commitment-phobic.

Traveling: If he talks about wanting to be a free spirit just traveling country to country to enjoy plenty of different life experiences, then he’s not interested in having someone tie him down.

Climbing the Career Ladder: If this is his entire goal focus then he will probably be so married to his job that he won’t have much time to devote to keeping a relationship healthy and strong.

Game #8 the massage game

This game will reveal his nurturing level. Ask him to give you a half-hour massage without trying to touch you in a sexual way. The aim is just to relax you and make you feel good, not for him to make himself feel good as well. This telling you whether he can really nurture you.

If he completes the massage and you feel fantastic and relaxed: He not only has strong self-control but he has the ability to put aside his own needs to think of yours.

If he gets 15 minutes then starts fondling your thighs: He wants to be able to look after you but sometimes has to really push himself to be nurturing because his typical nature tends towards laziness.

If he wants to start making love within the first 10 minutes: He needs to do a lot of work on learning to think about others instead of just thinking about his needs and himself. It’s important for him to learn that sometimes you can be intimate without being sexual.

You feel like the world’s closing in on you? Like nothing seems to be going your way? Bet one of my friend can relate. It may look like the biggest dilemma in her life is which designer handbag to take to lunch at the Ivy but, the truth is, she’s going through a rough patch and the cracks are starting to show. Since broken up with hubby after 5 years married, Mary (not a real name) struggled to make a splash in the dating pool while ex-hubby moving at lightning speed with new hot girl in town. Her life become chaos; go clubbing almost every weekend, drink & drunk, children are not manage & send to grandma house, the work efficiency loss & work performance had reduced. She once was very stylist mum with good looking appearance now become unmanageable person with bad attitude. You might be run from the problem but it’s never solved and it will hunt you all the time because you still think about it.

So, how do you deal when your luck has packed its bag and taken a one way trip to Alaska just like our friend here? You “roll with the punches and not wallow,” as my friend said recently. “My life is a chaos right now. But you can let the chaos consume you or you can just walk along with it.” If you’re prepared to fight setbacks instead of losing the plot, you’re already in the fast lane to feeling better. But if you want to speed that 180 degree life makeover, you need a little insider info. The good news? Here something for you to go around.

Help #1 Friendship Fallout

Had a Paris & Lilo-style blowout? Drifted away from your mates? Being out of social loop can feel like a court-ordered exile. “My friend told me off for ditching her in favour of my new man,” reveals Becky, 25. “We didn’t speak for ages. It was agony because she was my go-to person for drinks and chats.”

Turn it around: No friends meaning no fun. No matter how much you think you can live without your buddies, you can’t. So, if you’re in the wrong – and we all know when we have stuffed up – than apology is in order.

“Universal laws of attraction say that, when we’re feeling negative, we attract more negativity and vice versa,” says author and life coach Andrew McCombe. “That means if you don’t resolve the issues with your friend, your pain will fester and other areas of your life will suffer.” If you’re the angle in the situation then, as long as your friend isn’t the toxic kind, be the bigger person and patch things up. Why not organize to hit the movies or the shops for your first outgoing together? That way there’ll be something else to focus on and you won’t feel so awkward.

Help #2 my family is a nightmare

There’s nothing like family drama to make you want to spend Christmas camping by yourself in Cuba. “My parents are divorced so holidays are difficult,” says Beth, 24. I always end up stressed, angry and exhausted.” If you can, you will like to leave the family and stay alone rather than live unhappy with all the problems makes you feel crazy.

Turn it around: Take an emotional step backwards. “When it comes to family, we let feelings and baggage clouds our judgement,” says therapist Dr Tracie O’Keefe. “Be more objective and look at situations from the outside so you don’t overact.” Remember, not every crisis is about you, so don’t get emotionally caught up. You’re not your family’s therapist and, while it’s great to be there for them, you need time out for yourself. “Photograph the good times,” says Dr O’Keefe. “That way you can look back when you need a reminder of how great your family can be.

Help #3 Career crisis

Copping more abuse at work than Naomi Campbell’s assistant? It could be time for career change. “I was so uninspired by my job that I’d cry on Monday mornings,” admits Emily, 24. “I wanted to quit but was scared. Then I was made redundant and realised I’d wasted two years whingeing instead of doing something about it.”

Turn it around: Figure out the cause: Is it a colleague, your boss, the pay? If it’s your company or industry, start job hunting. “First, do a career assessment, to see where your strengths and passions lie,” says careers consultant Katie Roberts. “You could also see a careers coach. Once you know what field you want to get into, check out employment sites for opportunities.” You could also try courses, work experience or take a break to recharge.

Help #4 BROKEN HEART

Breaking up is about as much fun as being hit by a bus. Just ask Renee, 28, whose boyfriend of six years dumped her out of the blue. “I was shattered for months,” she recalls. “Then I read the book It’s Called A Breakup Because It’s Broken by Greg Behrendt and realised I didn’t want to spend the next year of my life moping.”

Turn it around: The key to getting over a split is self-love and lots of it. “The worst thing you can do is become overwhelmed by it all,” says MsCombe. “Appreciate bad experiences as a reason to learn and grow.” Mary says writing poetry and decorating her new pad helped her feel good about life and herself again. She also took time out from partying to “cleanse” and spent many nights in with her besties and dog, Daisy. “It’s been hard, but I’ve come to the realisation that it’s ok to not be perfect,” she mused recently. “I’m just proud of allowing myself to think and to act and to be.” Sounds like Mary might finally be turning things around. How about you?

Below are 10 affective ways to get through a crisis. Try it out & it might be work for you:

1. Cry – Release your emotion by cry it out. If you don’t release that pent-up emotion, you’ll lash out at someone you don’t mean to.

2. Music – Listens to music that reminds you of happy times, not sad songs.

3. Pet – There’s nothing like the unconditional love of a pet to lift your spirits, so check out the SPCA.

4. Exercise – Do practise daily exercise, eat well and rest up. Looking after yourself is a key.

5. Hobby – Make the most time for things you love to do and let everything else fit in around that.

6. Happiness – Nothing in world can by happiness. Shine your day by buy yourself flowers. They’ll boost your mood instantly.

7. Express Emotion – Write down how you’re feeling at the end of each day. It’ll help you to release emotion.

8. Time – Spend time with loved ones who can support you and hang out with children – they’re so carefree and happy, it’s infectious.

9. Face it – Talk yourself through difficult situations out loud. Putting problems into words can make the solution clearer.

10. Focus – Focus on the present. Think about positive things and the opportunities that await.

It’s never too late for changes. Never afraid to face problem and bring yourself for changes. Don’t let the world bring you down but face them. Fight for yourself and your happiness. Wake up from dream and challenge yourself will make you change yourself to brand new you. All the best…….

find the best solution to save the relation. Why? Why most of the relationship that was built because of loves never ends with good ending & happiness? Most of it happens to the married couples and some of them just ignore it. Is it because of modern lifestyles or our peoples already used to the divorce which means nothing to the society? There’re lot of reasons given by few couples that facing this problems saying that maybe there’s no more chemistry between them or married too fast or too young causing the divorces.

Nowadays, it very common to hear cheating spouses. And who’s to blame? And maybe you also face the same problem with or without your consciousness. Were there any signs shows that your partner turns over you? Of course you can see the sign if you’re not the one who cheat, right? So, how about it? What are you going to do? Whether they showed signs or not is inconsequential. Like anyone who has been hit with an unpleasant truth, you keep asking yourself one question: Why? And why lots of people out they still want to do it? And why even though you can save your relationship, you choose not to.

Marriage Fail #1 I Deserve Someone Better

Some people never appreciate a little thing happen in their life & always asking for more. “I want this, I want that… you not there whenever I need you… you never listen when I talking to you…or you never pay much attention whenever I need it…” Lastly, “Only after all the difficulty we’ve been went through together, I’m sorry; I only realize that you’re actually not the right person for me.” Do you ever ask your partner about your need? Do you ever improve your communication? Do you spend enough time with your partner? When you start to think he not good enough for you or neglected your need, no matter what or how he do to please you, you also still feel like you’re not getting the loves / needs you deserve.

When the communication start to breakdown & you doesn’t care about him anymore, you try to find someone else which you might think understand you better than him. Telling yourself a new person is caring and understands your need at the early stage of the relationship is not something special or something you believe can last forever because he just guest your needs & desires is all well & good but what happens when their fortune-telling skills come up short? Then they move onto someone else still using the same excuse; “no one understands them like (fill in blank) does”. Blaaaaa..blaa…..never ending story & if you not changing your attitude you’ll never find someone but you’ll lost all of them & the happiness.

Marriage Fail #2 I Need More Pleasure & Satisfaction

Many couples at the early stage of relationship full with passion & love seems appear endless. As time goes by, with a busy work, environment & people around you, the connection between you & your partner slowdown slowly without you realized there’s changes in your routine as the communication also become cool off. The love & lush once burning like fire guiding your love but once you deny the present of isolated acid rain shower on it without do anything, it will become heavy and when you start to realized, of course nothing much you can do to save it from getting wet.

As alternative, you look elsewhere to find that fire going again. You might find it, but without making the commitment to build a solid foundation, it will only be a matter of time before you start searching all over again. May be before you decide to leave your partner & plan to start new relationship, it’s better to think deeply & make a right decision without regret it in future. The best way is try to find the solution with your partner; discuss & find the cause of the problem & improve by concentrating at each part where you’ve been neglected before. With pray & love that already born between both of you will bring you to the good ending. At least you try rather than didn’t do anything, right?

Marriage Fail #3 I Can Do What I Want

This type of attitude upon happened to working couples where the communication is very less and each person is successful in their career where when they do something wrong which they think challenging themselves without knowledgeable by their partner especially at the work area or other country making them feel exhilaration and successfully. You think that if he can do whatever he wants, I also can. Because when suspiciousness comes in between couples, sometimes they try to avoid it and don’t want to discuss because of ego & selfishness. To have an affair which you think is other alternative whenever you need somebody other than you partner to give you more pleasure & calming sensation wherever your couple is not there when you need him.

In fact when the stakes are higher and the consequences of getting caught are more severe, this seems to motivate people even more to take the plunge. You know it is wrong but you still want to do it; you feel guilty but you continue the affairs; you suspecting your partner know about it but you keep silence; If all these happen to you, you need to renew yourself & if you still want to enjoy your life & want to make sin… you can continue it… but don’t involves your innocent partner.

Marriage Fail #4 This is What I Want

First, ask yourself what are you going to do if you’re your partner, the victim & your partner is you, the actor the one who first start playing the game & you don’t know what game it is? However, human have a selfish attitude when it comes to own exhilaration. One principle for them: “I don’t care what people say! This is what I want!” Of course, it’s not a weird thing or wrong to get or have what you want. How you can deny yourself the pleasure of someone new and attractive? (Although you know it’s wrong) “Why not I try? I’m not doing anything wrong as long as I not get caught.” Well, humans’ ego is bigger than sea, whether their partner finds out is a moot point. Their ego says go for it and they always do what their ego tells them. Is that what you really want? Sometimes, you should stop using your mind to think but use your heart that will make you become more human.

Marriage Fail #5 I Need New Life / Environment

Are you just come out from the prison because of drug addicts? Of course, not right? Then why you still need new life / environment since you already have it. You have a complete family: Spouse, children, home, car, money, career…… You think you’re not happy. Feel like something missing in your life? Then, what is it? Are you ever tried to find what makes you feel like that? No. Why? Because you think that whatever uneasy or uncomfortable feeling that you have is because of your partner. You think that only he/she responsible to whatever happen to your relationship and you have nothing to do with it.

Do you ever ask yourself why all this things happen to you? Do you ever try to discuss with your spouse on what you feel? If all this things you never do, you totally go to the wrong road out of your scope as a family man / woman. Where is your responsibility as a husband / wife? After many years of happy marriage, you suddenly feel that you need some changes and decide to turn over your partner by having someone else in your life. Sometimes, you need changes in your life, but it doesn’t mean to find someone else but you need to see from positive perspective first by start to find the problem, discuss with your partner, find the solution, try everything to overcome the problem & evaluate the result before you decide to find the comfortable outside the house.

There’s variety reason or excuses why people cheat in their relationship but to scratch the surface will take many years. As alternative, you can probably put the five mentioned above at the top of the list. None of this makes it okay but you have to face or deal in the real world. Infidelity exists; always has, always will. Accepting that fact will guarantee you are not caught off guard by any unpleasant surprises which may occur.

Before he even knew she ever existed, it had been dead clear that Zelleger’s shy character Dorothy, was devoted to the fast-talking self-centred Jerry. But in falling so fast and hard was she setting herself up for disappointment? It’s a question that could well be posed to Tom Cruise i real life. In his whirlwind romance with Katie Holmes, he has behaved like a love struck puppy, declaring his love for the 26-year-old actress an Oprah only a month after they started dating. a few weeks later the couple were engaged. soon after, they were expecting a child and now they’re married.

The sheer speed of Cruise’s relationship has set tongue’s wagging. It is really possible to fall in love that fast? Is it wise? Is the intensity sustainable? And when love moves at such lightning speed is there emotional fall-out down the track? “There’s this myth that if you meet someone and it’s the real thing you should be love-struck immediately and feel you can’t live without that person,” says relationship counsellor, Allegra Tripodi. “But rushing a relationship can cause lots of problems. It can prompt you to make bed decisions, misread signals and exaggerate feelings. It can also lead you to give more than you receive or create an impression that you’re just very keen. In the long-term, taking a romance too fast could result in you being let down, used or mistreated and ending up nursing a broken heart.” 

To make sure you don’t get burned you need to put the brakes on your emotions when you’ve barely met a guy and within one night you’re thinking, “It’s the real deal”. Stop. Take a breath. Now don’t call him or talk about him (at least for the next few milliseconds). Don’t let yourself have one more “when we move in together/get engaged/declare our love” kind a thought until you’ve asked yourself the following key questions:   

“Stop planning the wedding dress and his & her bathrobes when you’re barely had one date.”

Q #1 Am I Rushing Too Much?

Are you worried this guy isn’t really that keen on you and might be distracted by another woman if you don’t make your claim on him right away? Or has it been so long between relationships that you don’t want to hold back now that you’ve finally found a man who pushes all the right buttons? If you tend to fall in love every other week with any guy who chats to you or glances in your direction, it’s likely there’re deep-seated self-esteem problems driving your sense of urgency to ‘find love so fast.

“Maybe you don’t feel feel worthwhile without a man’s adoration so your sense of immediately stems from your need to be loved because it makes you feel valid and visible,” says Tripodi. “Maybe you’re so in love with the idea of being that you believe every new man you meet is the one you’ve been waiting for all your life – regardless of how little you really know him and whether or not he is truly compatible with you or not.”

Chances you’re tired of seeing all your friends snuggling up to their boyfriends and feeling like you’re the only one missing out. But if you push a relationship with a guy you barely know you may force things to the point where you miss out anyway – because you end wasting so much time on men who are not good relationship material in the first place. You used to fall in love with every guy you dated, go home and fantasize about how great it’d feel once you’re locked in each other’s arms all night. While you’re plotting your lives together in my mind you didn’t even know them well enough to be sure whether they took their coffee with milk and sugar. But after years of this pattern you realized you’re having one failed relationship after another because you were falling in love too quickly.

When you’re getting to know someone it takes time for their true character to shine through and you never waited that long. This meant there were lots of things about the guys you’re dating that you didn’t pick up – like one guy’s tendency to be super critical or another guy’s lake of personality – things that ultimately annoyed me but that you glossed over at the start. You guess you’re so keen on being in love that even a relationship with someone not quite right seemed better than having no relationship at all. But you were wrong – too rush into one ill-fated relationship after another won’t make feel better – it made you feel worse because you kept giving yourself over to love but it never seemed to last.  

Q #2 Is There Any Signs He’s Interested As You’re?

When you’re totally gone on a guy you’ve just met, your sense are in overdrive, but even though it’s a stretch to judge what’s going on objectively, you need to make that reality check. Better to be honest with yourself now than waste your energy planning to have babies with a guy who can’t even remember your name. So, the next time a boyfriend possibility is on the horizon, take a long, hard look at the signals he’s giving you.

Dos he keep looking your way when you run into his friends? Has he asked for your phone number or called you, even once? If you’ve already dated, how enthusiastic was he about hooking up again? If you have been dating exclusively for a few months, does he seem as into you as you are into him – or do you feel that the relationship is only working through all of your efforts to push it along? No matter how much you feel for this guy when he said you’re stunning beauty, the relationship won’t work if the vital signs are not good. Unless he’s keen, committed and demonstrative, it could be time to bail.    

Q #3 Are You Coming Too Strong?

This morning you send him 10 text messages. This afternoon you shot him a couple of emails. He’s so wonderful you can’t stop thinking about him and you want him to know you’re serious so that he gets serious about you. But be careful that in the process you don’t scare him off or send him running for cover.

“I met this great girl and I really wanted to go out with her,” says Ian, 26. “But after our first two dates she just became obsessed. She was testing me all day and ringing me on my mobile just to see what I was doing. I felt suffocated. she was saying stuff about me that was very flattering but that she couldn’t really mean because she didn’t know me that well. In the end the speed at which she fell for me scared me off not just because I felt overwhelmed but because she had this fantasy of a fairy-tale romance and I was secondary to that. In fact, I could have been any guy – what she really wanted was just to be able to say she was ‘in love’. I broke it off after a month and though I’m sure I did the right thing it was really sad – she was great girl who was just trying too hard.”

If you fall in love as quickly as you sneeze, you probably think that having a boyfriend will cure everything you you don’t like about yourself and your life. Gained a bit of weight? It won’t matter if someone loves you. Hate your job? If you’ll find love have things outside of work to focus on. Dislike your flatmate? Well, you get the picture. Trouble is,, this puts a lot of pressure on each guy you meet. It create a false incentive for you to fall in love over and over becasue you think that will bring you instant happiness.

“In light of this expectation, every relationship takes on mythic proportions as something that’ll transform your life, meet you every need and make your world perfect overnight,” says one of my friends. “So instead of just experiencing a natural high in the company of a man who attracts you, the need to be with him becomes all-consuming. You want it to work so badly that you fall in love with him willingly, hanging on his every word and thinking about him 24/7. And instead of letting the relationships take its natural course, you hasten things along by declaring you love him. You go to ridiculous lengths to bump into him, find out what he things of you and try to force him to love you back. Deep down whats driving this behavior is a huge fear that he won’t love you as much as you love him or that he’ll lose interest in you very fast.”  

Q #4 Can He Be Trusted?

If he the kind of guy who everyone thinks is decent and reliable or have you heard gossip that he’s a bit of a player? Does he call when he’s running late, apologize if he says something tactless or pay you back like he said he would because doesn’t have enough money for his share of the meal? It’s easy to overlook the little things when you’re head over heels about someone new, but it’s the little things which are big signposts indicating whether or not he’s worthy of your love.

So before you go telling him what a hot lover he is, how much you’ve waited for someone like him and how you think about him all day, make the call on whether or not he can be trusted with that info. Will he use it to manipulate you to get what he wants from the relationship or will he compliment you right back because it’s clear that he thinks you’re a fantastic girls?

If you’ve done most of the legwork in this romance it may ne hard to figure out if he is genuinely smitten with you or just going along for the ride. Ask your friends what they think, elicit some comments on him from his friends and see what response you get – it will be clear whether you adoration of him is something he reciprocates or totally misplaced.

Q #5 Is He Sweet Talking Me?

Your eyes are beautiful, your breasts are perfect and he just can’t stop looking at you. Not only has he flattered you with all these compliments, but he said them on the first night you met. Later, when he kissed you, it was long and hard. You felt completely carried away with with passion. On both dates you’ve melted in his company and he’s made you feel protected and idolized. Flattering? You bet – but are you sure he’s for real? It’s easy to fall i love with a guy who keeps putting his arm around you and showering you with compliments.

His attention may make you feel desirable, but is he genuine or spinning you a line? When women rush it and don’t take the time to see the true dynamics of a relationship they often end up getting hurt,” says Hallwood. “It took me a long time to realize that I fell instantly for any guy who paid me the slightest bit of attention,” says Marie, 25. If a guy was really laying on the compliments I was a total sucker for it because I wanted to believe every word he said. I’d rush to exchange numbers, rush into having sex with him and push to see him again as often as possible.

“My urgency was very much about wanting to feel the headiness of love before I got to know the guy. Once I did know about wanting to feel the headiness of love before I got to know the guy. One I did know more about most boyfriends I’d often start to see that they weren’t anything like the fantasy man I’d built them up to be in my mind? My habit of discussing each new love interest as ‘the one’ was making me blind to what I really needed to look for – not a man who fed me clichés about love, but a man who was sincere, communicative and happy to be with me for the long haul. So, I started to go-slow policy with every new guy I met.”

“At first it was hard to hold back and not expressing my lover verbally or physically felt like torture. But in the long term it was so much better when I stopped getting all gushy over a guy after just two dates and took my time, and found not  only that I could think more clearly but that I didn’t get hurt nearly as much because I started being more perceptive in my choices about men. By taking things slower, I didn’t have unrealistic expectations that every date was ultimately heading to a walk down the aisle. I also found it was much easier to discern when a guy was just trying to sweet talk me to get me into bed or when he really did thank that we’d made a connection.”

Q #6 Are You Rushing Things 

There’s a big difference between being swept up on a wave of romance and letting it completely wash you away. “When you’re swept up you feel great but see things clearly; when you’re swept away you feel out of control,” says Hallwood. “What you need to remember is this – if the guy you like is a great as you think and as interested as you hope, than he’s not going anywhere – if he likes you he will want to get to know you better and encourage the relationship to develop and grow. So take your time and enjoy the wonderful, heady process of getting to know each other – there will be plenty of time for saying ‘I Love You’ and ‘I Do’ down the track.”