FREE INDEED – An Allegory

I remember my prison cell:  four small walls – it was a simple box I was existing in.  I would decorate, try to make it seem like it wasn’t so bad.  But the company was almost unbearable.

I was imprisoned with…my selfish thoughts, my worries, my bias’s, my insecurities, my guilt, my criticisms, my questions, my doubt, my unbelief.  Often they would gang up on me and give me a good beating.  To say the least, I was barely existing.

Although it had seemed I was making a life for myself, there in that tiny space, I knew in my heart there had to be more to life than just this prison cell.  I just didn’t know what I was missing since I couldn’t see outside my four walls.

When people would pass by, I had always been pretty good at looking fine.  “It’s not so bad in here,” I would say to them.  “I mean, who doesn’t have troubles now and then.  I like my cell.  I feel independent.  It’s my world and I’m the one in charge.”

But the truth was, I was facing life without parole and then death by execution.

That was my life before something extraordinary happened.  Someone came to the jail one day and purchased my pardon.  He set me free.

He set me free! 

I have to admit, I was afraid to step out of the cell.  It’s all I’d ever known.  Who’s to say I’ll find anything better on the outside?  He beckoned me to come.  So, I had to make the choice.  Would I go or would I stay in my familiar pitiful existence?

I CHOSE to step outside my cell!

Immediately, I saw rolling meadows of peace and resolve.  I felt a huge burden lifted from my shoulders and I was able to run in the wide-open spaces. I somehow knew inside that THIS was what I was created for.

He gave this gift to me.  He showed a love that I still can’t understand. I was ashamed of my long rap sheet of disappointments and failures.  I thought of hiding it from Him, for fear He’d change His mind.  But He already knew and told me it was me He came for, exactly as I was.

I had nothing to offer Him in return except my willingness to go with Him and still He helped me escape! But He’s not finished!  Peace, joy, hope, wisdom, power, righteousness – He wants to give me all of this everyday of my freedom!  Wow!  He wants to put these gifts into my life to replace those prison companions.  He said HE would do it!

Realizing He offered all of this, I took Him up on it – receiving from Him all He promised and the boundless joy of God.

Now that I have begun to experience this joy, certainly I would never return to my chains!  Right?

Honestly, that’s what’s so shocking!  Sometimes, fears and doubts creep in and I choose to doubt His love – after all HE’s done, I choose to doubt Him!   I think back to the familiar life of my cell.  Sure, it was a pathetic existence, but it was secure.  That’s when I begin to feel the chains again!

Although I’ve found myself in this place more times that I desire, He remains patient and gently reminds me – Wherever the joy of God is not present, (Wherever you are not giving Me access to your life to break the chains that hold you captive) the death sentence is still at work.  I realize now, that, even in my freedom, I have to choose to walk away from the chains that bound me.

I have to tell you…Pardon can only come one way.  Christ’s death is the pardon.  If I say to myself that I do not want to come by His way – admitting I am in trouble -deserving of the cell and the sentence, then I have chosen my chains.

Back when I lived in my cell, my cellmates talked about this Person who could pardon.  They’d say He was cold and uncaring, making them admit that they needed His help and, without Him, they were doomed.  Instead, they chose to convince themselves that their cells and their independence were all they needed.

They were right about part of it.  He DOES command that we come by one way alone.  But, amazingly, this way is a boundless entrance into freedom – full pardon and forgiveness.

HE is freedom.

If I could ever go back and tell them the truth, I’d say God doesn’t go about pretending we are all right when we are all wrong.  Instead, He goes about making a way for us to become ALL RIGHT…and  SET US FREE!

So, my life has been about making choices – beginning with the one I made, when I left my cell that day.  Now, I daily choose to cast off the shackles and weights from my past – as the Bible calls them…”sins that so easily beset us.”

For those of you still in the cell, life out here is more than I ever hoped for – greater than I can describe to you.  All I know is that I’m free.

I am free!

Today is a day meant for freedom.  If you aren’t living in it, you can!

Originally posted December 2011.

Several weeks ago I sat in a Dave Ramsey Financial Peace seminar and he was talking about exponential returns on investments.  He explained that a 19 year old who invests $2,000 a year for 8 years and doesn’t touch the money until he’s 65 will be a multimillionaire.  He went on to say if a 27 year old began investing the same amount over 39 years, they would have a third less money at the age of 65 than the one who began investing at 19.  He shared graphs and numbers and stats but what stuck out to me was this – There is an amazing and yet simple way to a secure retirement and I missed it by a long shot!!  Yuck! 

You know that feeling you get when you missed out on something you could have EASILY taken part in – maybe it’s an enormous one day sale; or maybe someone took advantage of an amazing offer you missed.  I don’t like that feeling.

Put it in spiritual terms and it takes on a whole deeper level of importance.  It creates an even greater remorse to the one who realizes they missed the opportunity.

Regrets.  I have some.  I’m sure you do too.

The reality is that it’s never too late to make spiritual investments and the returns are incomparable.   Why?

There’s eternal reward:

“Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal.  Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal.  Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.”  Matt 6:19-21

There’s earthly blessing:

“And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.”  Philippians 4:19

I was reading this morning a passage in Isaiah.  It was a simple verse that got me thinking:

 Isaiah 51:2b “Abraham was alone when I (God) called him.  But when I (God) blessed him, he became a great nation.”

If you know the story of Abraham and Sarah, you remember that they were old when God gave them a son.  Sarah was 90 when she conceived. They had been “alone” but God gave them a son and went on to give them more descendants than the stars.

Genesis 26:4 I will cause your descendants to become as numerous as the stars of the sky, and I will give them all these lands. And through your descendants all the nations of the earth will be blessed.

Are you feeling alone?  Are you feeling as though the opportunity to make a smart investment has passed you by?  It hasn’t!!

With anything we place in the hand of God, there is potential for exponential growth.   The beauty of it all is that the growth of the investment is not indicative of what we are “able to invest” – since we often feel we don’t have much to offer and we’d be right.  The lavish growth comes from the grace of God.

His numbers never reflect our initial investment!  They reflect His generous heart!

When I was twenty years old, I moved away from home to travel and sing with a singing group in Georgia.  I had grown up in church and, to be honest, I questioned in my heart, “What does all of this really mean to me?  What do I really believe about God?”  It was a lonely time in my life.  During that time, I chose to answer His call.  I offered myself to Him even though it didn’t seem like much.

It’s a wonder to me why God seeks us out?  Look at Abraham.  God called him when he was alone.  God called me when I was alone.  Nothing to offer but myself…and then He goes on to bless me!

Maybe you feel like I did when I sat in that Dave Ramsey class and it dawned on me I’d missed an opportunity to invest.  It’s too late!

Well, friend, it’s not too late! Embrace God’s call on your life today!

I think it’s important to be clear, in case you are reading this and thinking…”Oh, prosperity gospel.  She’s saying if I surrender my life to God, I’ll be rich.”  I’d like to interject, I wouldn’t be taking a seminar on financial freedom if I was rich by worldly standards.   I’ve made mistakes and I’m learning about how to use money responsibly and make wise choices – to eliminate debt.  It’s empowering to have a plan to reach financial freedom.  But what I’m talking about is not material wealth.  It’s a wealth that fulfills us on the deepest level of who we are.  I’m talking about Spiritual wealth.

The blessing of the LORD makes a person rich, and he adds no sorrow with it.  Proverbs 10:22

I look around at how this investment in the eternal is already paying off in the present.  He has surrounded me with His goodness.  He has given me a a wonderful husband and 3 beautiful children to love.  Because of Christ, my extended family brings great enjoyment to my life as well.  I have a wonderful church family.  The friendships God has given are too many to number.  The opportunities to serve and use my gifts are overflowing and never too few!  The way He has provided for my every (emotional, physical, financial and spiritual) need is overwhelming.  I have been blessed.  Life hasn’t been easy but it’s been so good!  And the best is yet to come!

So now, looking back at that time when I was “alone”, I recall my decision to invest in God and His kingdom.  And here’s what I love… I’ve had no regrets!

Today might be the perfect day for you to make a spiritual investment!

Each morning lately I open my eyes around 5:30 without fail.  Now, I would love to sleep longer – mainly because I LOVE TO SLEEP.  In fact, I will usually force my eyes closed once again and try to go back to my dreams.  The problem is my mind begins to race.

I find myself reviewing the tasks of the day, mulling over issues I’m dealing with, making mental notes of grocery items and projects.  It’s just no use.  I usually concede and get out of bed.

I’m not sure why.  Maybe it’s age or hormones or my diet – but I often wake feeling a cloud of confusion shrouding my thoughts.  I feel anxious.  It’s like my feelings seem to get tangled up at night and I wake with a big knot of concern.

I usually don’t feel this way for long.  Once I’m settled into my place on the couch for my quiet time with coffee in hand, I have shaken off the fuzziness of sleep over my mind and I’m able to think and see clearly.  But nevertheless, it’s become part of my daily routine to wake in a funk that seems like it will last all day.

I’ve been learning a lesson in all of this.  It doesn’t matter how I feel.  My feelings don’t have to dictate my day.  I’ve begun to counteract this wave of emotion upon waking with prayer.

Often, I swing my legs over the side of the bed and whisper to God, “Lord, my feelings are all over the place but my heart is to serve you.”

Recently, I read a verse that brings a smile to my heart because it has been a reminder for me of God’s constant presence in my life and His awareness of my recent struggle with my waking feelings… Psalm 143:8 says,

“Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you.  Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul.” 

The truth is, no matter how I feel, no matter what is going on in my life, I can count on God’s unfailing love!  Not only that, this verse reminds me that I can TRUST Him!  He will show me the path through each day as I surrender myself to Him…the whole mess.

This lesson reminds me of a time not long ago when I went shopping with Abby.  She picked out a beautiful, delicate necklace.

I told her that she would need to take good care of it since it would easily tangle if she wasn’t careful.  Recently, she came to me with it balled up in knots and asked me if I could fix it for her.  I got to thinking about how I go to God with the same request…can you help me get untangled?  Thankfully, in His unfailing love, He frees me up to live without feelings of despair.

That’s the remedy, you know.  If you wake feeling anxious or experience moments of overwhelming emotion, you don’t have to stay there.  They don’t have to dictate your day.  Just go to God.  His well of provision is deep and bountiful.

Are you feeling tangled up? Do you struggle against your feelings or your circumstances?   Surrender it to Him.  ALL OF IT.  And watch Him work in His unfailing love.

Whatever you do, do well.  Ecc. 9:10a

A couple of weeks ago, I had the great privilege to speak to a small group of ladies for the CWCA  (Christian Women’s Commerce Association) here in Delaware.  I remember, when my friend Dawn asked me to share, wondering what God would have me say.  I began to pray for His message to the ladies.

What did I have to say to Christian Women about business?  What had my experiences brought me to on the matter?  It came down to “The Importance of Fluidity.”

I remember, at the age of 15, surrendering my life to Jesus.  I had big dreams.  I wanted to do great things for God.  I was driven and hoped to take the fast track to success in the career world.  The question was, what would I do?

I believed God deserved excellence.  I believed with God all things are possible.  In fact, after graduating college, with a degree in Psychology, I went on to work at a missions organization.  There, after a few years, I found myself working as the president’s assistant.  Truly this was what God desired.  Hard work and a drive for success.  Right?  My motto would look a lot like the passage in Ecclesiastes.  “Whatever you do, do well.”  Let’s just say, I’ve learned a big lesson over the years!

I left that mission’s organization and not long after, began a singing ministry with my family – Calling Levi.  We traveled for over 10 years on the road, rising to a place where opportunities began to knock on our door more and more.  The possibility for national exposure was in our reach when God changed the plans, drastically.  He called us out of the traveling music ministry to plant a church.

It was during our time on the road that my sister and I started Luminosity Photography & Design.  Photography has always been a passion and we found that we could create a flexible work schedule that would not conflict with our traveling schedule.  It worked well.  God blessed.  He gave us an amazing studio at an amazing location.   It seemed logical that God would use Luminosity and the income we’d receive to help us transition from life on the road to life as church planters.

Just after Christmas, our business partner and friend, Todd, came to us and told us it looked as though he would have to sell his property.  Our studio is ON his property.  Insert record scratch here.  CHANGE OF PLANS!   The “for sale” sign went up and the questions came.  What would happen to Luminosity?  Would we look for another location for our studio?  Does this mean this chapter is over?  Surprisingly, with all the questions, we were at peace.  In fact, we wondered what God might have up His sleeve – what was next on the horizon.

As I prepared to speak to the women, it dawned on my that I HAVE learned a lot over the years regarding Christian women and business.  And what I’ve learned has turned my driven ambition into child-like faith. 

I was able to bring it down to three simple thoughts for the ladies that night.  Although God desires for us to do things well, I’ve learned:

1. To never let my business define me.  Whether it be singing or photography or being a pastor’s wife or working in the corporate world…God has taught me to allow Him to define my life and story.  I am His child first.  I learned this lesson in the many twists and turns of life.
2. Surrender fully to God’s purposes and plans.  Full surrender helps me to keep “what I do” in the right place in my life.  It keeps me from defining myself by what I do instead of who I am in Christ. In this, I have come to understand that:
   1. A surrendered heart is always the most creative and alive.
      1. I have had more fun than ever since I fully surrendered my life and plans to The Lord.  It’s as though we are constantly on the move.  My opportunities are being re-defined continually.  In each new role, I’ve been able to develop the God-given desires with in me and that makes me feel fully alive!
   2. A surrendered heart safeguards you from the trap of the “big break”.  When you’re fully surrendered to God, you can stop striving and wishing.   You don’t have to beat yourself up if you feel that you “missed it.”
      1. If I could just get that promotion…
      2. If we could land that account…
      3. If the right person comes along…
      4. If we could just get that meeting…
3. When there is a change of plans…CHANGE.  It’s a constant state of fluidity – def. the ability to flow.
   1. As I picture the course of my life, I see the many twists and turns I’ve experienced.  In the beginning I was like a big blob of sludge.  I would slowly and stubbornly mold my self into each and every turn.  I’d get there, but the process took a while.  As I’ve grown and learned, I’ve become more willing to approach the twists and turns of life and flow through them trusting God to guide.  He hasn’t failed me yet!

This was the message to the women that evening a few short weeks ago.  It’s my message to you today…whomever it may be, struggling with the course your life is taking.  God’s got a plan…He always does.
I leave you with a quote from my favorite author,

  “It is not your business to succeed, but to do right .  When you have done so, the rest lies with God.”  C S Lewis.

Oh, and I guess I should tell you, the for sale sign came down.  The property is no longer up for sale – yet another twist in my life story.  God is giving us more time in this chapter.  What about you?  Are you letting God define you?  Maybe there is a big turn up ahead.  Are you willing to flow?  Trust God.  Be His child first and leave the rest to Him!  You won’t be disappointed.  I promise!

There is nothing new under the sun. Ecc 1:9b 

Nobody likes to be duped.

That’s why I paid special attention to an article I found in the latest copy of Consumer Reports.  The title that caught my eye was Sneaky Packaging.

Recently, Mark and I signed up for a class called Financial Peace and one of the principles we learned is to make every dollar count – assign each dollar to a purpose.  That way, you don’t waste your money.  Well, as you can imagine, it’s changed the way I shop.  I pay attention to unit prices and sales.  I look for coupons.  It’s really become a game of sorts for me to make the most of each dollar.  It’s empowering!  I honestly didn’t expect to feel empowered by learning principles of savings and debt reduction.  I expected to feel extremely restricted.  To my surprise, I’ve enjoyed every minute.

However, as I’ve learned the truth about consumerism, I’ve seen the err of my ways in many different areas.  Here’s an example.

I admit it…I’ve always been a sucker for “new and improved”.  It might be my interest in graphic design that causes me to reach for the item with the new packaging.  But whenever a company decides to repackage a product that I normally buy, I’m usually intrigued and snatch it up.  Maybe it’s the pretty colors on the label or the font usage.  Whatever the case, new packaging is always appealing to me.  Or, it was until I learned a little lesson from Consumer Reports.

The article was called Sneaky Packaging.  I learned so much about how companies are allowed, under the guidelines of the Food and Drug Administration, to make very loose claims about what their products do, simply by adding the word “MAY” to the front of the phrase. “May help reduce the risk of Heart Disease.” They can make that claim because their product may or may not do what it claims.   It’s not particularly an outright lie.

Before reading this article, I would have found myself asking, “Why wouldn’t these claims be true?  Certainly they wouldn’t put it on the box without there being some type of research to back it up.”  My general thought from the bright colored packaging is “They’ve improved this item for me, the buyer!  They are trying to help me out.”  Without much thought at all…I was allowing myself to be duped.

Another trick companies may often use is to color a produce bag (such as a bag of carrots) to the color of the carrot so that it’s more appealing – a nice bright orange – making the carrots look almost flawless until you open the bag.

Some items, you may have always bought in an 8 count box…are all of the sudden a 6 count box.  Bags of sugar have been downsized.

One trick I found very interesting was that companies will indent the bottom of jars in order to cut down on the amount in the jar.  Each consumer will only lose perhaps an ounce or two when they buy but the companies makes millions.  What you can guarantee is that the jar will never say, “One less ounce – same great price!” 

Now, you can bet, I am watching products closely and looking for the deceptive marketing that leaves me wanting.  Since I read the article, I find myself picking up all kinds of jars (peanut butter, mayonnaise, etc.) at the grocery store to see if I’m being cheated.  I pay attention to how many come in the box.  I read the fine print.

It’s amazing what a little truth can do for one’s outlook.  And the truth is – deceptive marketing is big business!

So how do I apply this to my heart and my life?

During our women’s bible study discussion Sunday night, we were talking about how nothing is new under the sun.  God’s Word tells us that.  Beware of the “New and Improved”.

I see in my own life that when the sin I seem to struggle with over and over no longer carries an appeal – no longer catches my eye,  Satan packages up that sin to make it once again appealing.  Same old sin, new angle.  Maybe you’ve felt that you beat the sin that trips you up until that new packaging came around and you found yourself sucked back in.  Each time you buy into it you feel even more cheated and foolish for believing it was all it claimed to be.

Being duped in the grocery store is one thing.  Being duped in life is another, especially when it steals your joy and victory!  How do I safeguard against it?

KNOW THE TRUTH.  ^“And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”  John 8:32   It’s really that simple.

I don’t want to fall for the lies that Satan sets before me with their pretty packaging and fancy letters.  Sin will always be sin.  It will always lead to death. 

The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My (God’s) purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.  John 10:10

As I seek truth in my life, I’m able to pass by the fancy packaging that once enticed me.  I am able to see the deception that used to so easily draw me in .  It’s empowering!

Are you being duped?  You can have confidence and strength to resist the temptation to succumb to sin no matter how pretty the packaging may be.  Just ask God to show you truth.  Go to God’s Word and find your answers there.  The truth remains.  There’s nothing new under the sun.

If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.  James 1:5

And, if you ever happen to see me out at the grocery store staring at the bottom of a peanut butter jar, I haven’t lost my mind.  I’m just tired of being duped!

Those of you who are friends with me on Facebook have watched over the past few weeks as a nest of bluebirds have been making their way into the world.  We have several bird houses in our back yard and not long ago I noticed that the eggs in one of them had hatched.

Mark and I have been “bird watchers” for several years now.  Something that I thought would be an enjoyable, tranquil pastime has been nothing but!  You see, when a nest of eggs is laid and the baby birds hatch, many of them don’t make it out of the nest.  That was news to me.  But there are many predators on the prowl.  Sparrows have been called “natures bullies” in the bird world.  They will find a nest and destroy the eggs or kill the baby birds and push them out of the nest.  It’s absolutely terrible!

In years past it seemed we couldn’t keep a nest of birds to the time of fledging. I’d come home from being out and head to the backyard to find a terrible sight.  So, if you’re thinking bird watching might be the answer for your high blood pressure…think again!  Still, watching the birds is fascinating and enjoyable to me.

The key is that it is ABSOLUTELY critical for the bird to build their nest in the right place.  The bird houses have provided safety for the most part, but the nests built in the trees are often open targets for danger.  Where a bird builds it’s nest very often determines whether the baby birds will live or die.

What is so amazing to me, is the role of the parents.  These birds spend days, perhaps weeks, building their nest.  Back and forth to the birdhouse they fly with twigs, feathers, and all kinds of things just to make a soft place to lay their eggs.  Then they wait for their little ones to arrive.  Once the very first egg hatches, the mother bird will go in and remove the shell and the baby bird almost immediately chirps for food.  Then progressively each of the eggs begin to move and crack as the others make their way into the world. They chirp out what seems like a continuous cry, “FEED ME”.

That’s what amazes me about the parents.  They fly for food continuously.  They bring it back and head back out for more.  When a predator or presumed threat nears the nest, the parents will swoop down to protect their young.  It’s just amazing.  They work SO HARD and so selflessly.  Watching them provides a great life lesson.

It’s a lesson that ties in very well with a passage of scripture from God’s Word.  Matthew 7:24-28 says,

Building on a Solid Foundation

 “Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the flood waters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.”

Like these birds, we all build a house.  On the heals of Mother’s Day,  I consider how I work so hard to make a safe place for our children.  I do my best to provide food and shelter.  I want my family to feel that our home is a haven in a sometimes cruel and difficult world.  It’s so important to me that they know I am here to love and care for them.  I’m like most moms in that way.   You probably feel just like me.

But what I learn from the passage in Matthew is that where I build my home is what’s most important.  Why?  Because the rain and flood waters are going to come and the wind is going to beat upon the house.  But if I build it on the Rock (Jesus Christ), it will not fall.  The opposite is also true.  If I build my house on shifting sand (anything other than Christ) it will collapse with a mighty crash.

Mothering my children has offered me many lessons in self-sacrifice and working hard.  But what I’ve realized most of all is that I want my home to be built upon the Rock.  I want to point my children to Jesus every day of their lives.   With that being said, I want to leave you with an inspiring story I find very fitting for today’s post.

A Mother’s Walk

The young mother set her foot on the path of life.  Is the way long, she asked?  Her guide said, “Yes, and the way is hard and you will be old before you reach the end of it, but the end will be better than the beginning.  But the young mother was happy and she would not believe that anything could be better than these years.

So, she played with her children and gathered flowers for them along the way and bathed with them in the clear streams.  And the sun shone on them and life was good and the young mother cried, “Nothing will ever be lovelier than this.”

And then the night and storms came and the path was dark and the children shook with fear and cold and the mother drew them close and covered them with her mantle. And the children said, “Oh mother, we are not afraid  for you are near and no harm can come.”

And the mother said, “This is better than the brightness of day, for I have taught my children courage.”

And the morning came and there was a hill ahead and the children climbed and grew weary and the mother was weary.  But at all times she said to the children, “A Little patience and we’ll be there.”  So the Children climbed and when they reached the top they said, “We could not have done it without you, mother.” And the Mother when she lay down that night looked up at the stars and said, “this is a better day than the last for my children have learned strength in the face of hardness.  Yesterday, I gave them courage, today I have given them strength.”

“And the next day came strange clouds which darkened the earth, clouds of war and hate and evil.  And the children groped and stumbled and the mother said, “Look, lift up your eyes to the Light.”  And the children looked and saw above the clouds an everlasting glory and it guided them and brought them beyond the darkness.  And that night the mother talked of Jesus and said, “This is the best day of all, for I have shown my children GOD.”

And the Days went on and the weeks and months and the years.  And the mother grew old and she was little and bent.  But the children were tall and strong and walked with faith and courage.  And when the way was rough they lifted her for she was as light as a feather.

And at last they came to a hill and beyond the hill they could see a shining road and golden gates flung wide.  And the mother said, “I have reached the end of my journey and now I know that the end is better than the beginning for my children can walk alone for they walk with God.” And the Children said, “You will always walk with us, mother, even when you have gone through the gates to the Savior.”  And they stood and watched her as she went on alone and the gates closed behind her.  And they said, “We cannot see her but she is still with us, a mother like ours is more than a memory, she is a living presence.”

Author ~ Temple Bailey

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When Mark and I moved into our home 7 years ago, we decided to have a small craft/sewing room built off of my bedroom.  Over the years, it’s interesting to see what has accumulated there:  a gift bag of Christmas receipts from 2011, flower bulbs (this is a mystery to me), torn clothes in need of a patch or repair, all of my jewelry, tons of fabric remnants, empty boxes, old costumes, broken toys, unfinished kids crafts, my scarves, pillow stuffing, small tools from the garage. Believe it or not, I found some baby items I never used when the kids were born. I could go on and on. There were a ton of things piling up in the room that just didn’t belong there.  The room that had once been very functional and full of creative life had become an impractical storage room of riffraff.

Needless to say, over the past several months, as I’ve plopped into bed, I’ve looked over at my sewing room and felt the clutter really getting to me.  I kept thinking to myself, “One of these days, I have gotta get that room cleaned up and get rid of all the mess!”    It’s been easy to keep pushing the job off because it’s a place most people never see.  The clutter really only bothers me and probably Mark at times.

Yesterday, I decided I would tackle the job.  During the process, I removed 3 whole bags of garbage and found a ton of useful things under the clutter that I’d forgotten I had.  With VBS coming up I was excited to find all kinds of materials and items I could use for the skit costumes.  I went through my boxes of jewelry and organized a system where I can see what I have instead of picking up the same earrings and necklace every day and putting them on.  I found some real treasures in my jewelry box that I hadn’t worn in a very long while.

So maybe there’s someone asking, “What made you cave and finally tackle that room?” In case you were wondering…it was my cluttered heart.  I started my day yesterday as usual.  I came down stairs to my place on the couch, spent some quiet time with God – reading my Bible and praying.  But I’ve been struggling.  I would say it’s been almost a week now.  I’ve felt burdened down and overwhelmed with too many thoughts and emotions.  Normally, some time in God’s Word and prayer help me to regain perspective and let my anxieties go.  But over the past couple of days, I haven’t been able to shake this heavy feeling of anxiety and depression.  Examining my heart yesterday morning was a lot like looking around the sewing room.  I didn’t know where to begin to unclutter all that concerned me and find some peace and clarity.

After my quiet time, I decided I needed to get moving.  It seemed like a project would be a good way to get my mind off the nagging heaviness in my heart.  As I spent time cleaning up my sewing room, I was able to think and pray.  And while I did, God brought a lot of truths to my mind.

Psalm 139: 23-24
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
    test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 Point out anything in me that offends you,
    and lead me along the path of everlasting life.

Psalm 51:10
Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

These verses became prayers.  I so wanted the relief of a peaceful heart and mind.

With God’s help, while I cleaned the sewing room, I was at the same time, cleaning up my heart.  He revealed unnecessary worries, bad attitudes, unforgiveness, pride and other feelings cluttering my heart and keeping me from enjoying feelings of peace and joy.  But it wasn’t enough to acknowledge them, I needed to remove them. I had to make the choice of removing thoughts from my mind that didn’t belong.

Bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.     2 Corinthians 10:5b

As the day went on, the room took on new purpose and my heart began to feel lighter too.  I confessed thoughts that grieved The Lord and burdened me down.  I prayed and surrendered anything that was worrying me over to God and I began to feel those burdens lift as well.

Something I realized along the way was that, like my sewing room, a lot of what was cluttering my heart was not purposefully put there.  So many things in my sewing room were dropped there “temporarily” or “thoughtlessly”.  It’s the same with my heart.  Much of what needed to go were feelings that hadn’t really been examined or considered.  They were just added to the pile.

I became intentional. With the clutter removed, I began to see there were treasures laying underneath all along.  I found so many things in my sewing room that I’d put there for safe keeping.  Finding them again was like opening a new gift.

It’s the same with my heart.  Maybe you’re feeling as though there’s nothing within your heart but a big cluttered mess. Nothing of value, only troubles.  With God’s help, I’ve been able to see once again that the clutter was hiding treasures I’d simply been unable to enjoy because I’d forgotten they are there.  Maybe you need to become intentional.  Clear out the clutter.  Become purposeful with the things that fill your heart.  It’s been a great reminder for me.

Philippians 4:8 says, 8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Today, my prayer is that you’ll be able to find purpose and perhaps let go of some unnecessary junk…after all, an uncluttered sewing room is great but there’s nothing like an uncluttered heart!

Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.  Prov 4:23

(Originally posted May 1, 2012)

The forecast for the next three days calls for rain.  Reminds me of a recent “teachable moment” I was blessed to experience.

On Saturday night just a week ago, I settled into bed early.  Sundays are always big for our family and I’ve come to realize a good night’s rest is imperative.  The kids had their baths and the house was quiet.  Mark was down in his chair preparing for Sunday’s message.

Just before I turned out the light, a storm blew in and thunder began to roll.  At that moment, I saw Hudson, our 10 year old, in our doorway.   He asked if he could lay in our bed until dad came up.  He’s at an age where it’s not necessarily cool to say he felt apprehensive about the storm so instead of probing, I told him to jump in.

The wind really picked up and the lightning filled our room with a blue glow.  Every time the thunder pealed, Hudson would inch closer to me. He was clearly shaken by the intensity of the weather beating at our window as if it were demanding to come in.

After a few minutes of listening to the storm, Hudson said to me, “Mom, I don’t really like rain.”

Taking my cue and realizing this is one of those times where a wise parental comment should be given, I said, “Well, Bud, we need a little rain every now and then.”

My response seemed to satisfy Hudson.  Maybe it was the confidence in my voice.  In it, he could hear that I was not alarmed by the wind, the lightning, the thunder.   Before I could blink, he was already sleeping there at my side.  I listened as his breathing slowed and he fell into a deep, deep sleep.  Then I was left with my thoughts and the rain on my windows.

           It’s true, you know…what I told Hudson.  We do need a little rain every now and then.

Rain leads to green pastures.  Drought leads to barrenness and fallow ground.  
Nothing grows where there is no rain!

How many times have I said to God, “I don’t like the rain!  I don’t like what is pouring down on my life right now!”  I have heard God’s response to my heart…”You need a little rain every now and then.”  As I considered this truth, I thought about this simple illustration God used to speak to me about His protection and infinite wisdom in the storm.

My thoughts turned in my head:

When the storm began, Hudson came looking for me for comfort and safety and as the storm grew stronger, he inched closer to me.  Isn’t it the same with God?  I often don’t seek God until the rain begins to fall…and when the storms rage, I then draw closer and closer to Him…

As that thought left me, another took it’s place. I began to wonder about all of the times in his life Hudson may have been scared and chose to stay in his bed instead of coming to me for comfort?  The thought of it pained me.

I love him so much!  Certainly Hudson must know he can ALWAYS come to me!  I would never want him to spend one moment feeling alone and gripped with fear!…Not when I’m right here to comfort him.

The fact is, Hudson was faced with a choice:  Staying in his bed, he would have been frozen – hiding under his blankets.  Or, coming to me, he would find safety and comfort.  I’m glad he chose to come.  And I can tell he is too!  It is evident as I watch him now sleep peacefully.

The storm didn’t stop but that didn’t matter to Hudson. When I draw close to God in the storm, I will always be in His safe keeping, even if He chooses not to stop the rain.  After all, He commands the winds and rain to obey.  (Matthew 8:27  The disciples were amazed. “Who is this man?” they asked. “Even the winds and waves obey him!”)

When I told Hudson not to be afraid, he trusted what I said to him and rested in my words.  Do I trust God like that?

As God protects me in the storm, my faith in Him grows.  I realize I do not need to rely on my own strength.  I do not need to cower in fear.  I simply need to inch closer to Him.  With God at my side, I no longer need to fret and worry about the storm. I can rest in knowing He is with me.

I have to be honest, I’ve come to realize in a big way that the rain will come. I also know that I can run to God when the storm hits.  This moment with my son helped me to understand the perfect example of what my response to God should always be and why.  His love and power are greater than the storm!

Maybe you can take a cue from Hudson…He’s a simple picture of what the Bible says in Psalm 4:8  In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, O LORD, will keep me safe.

Take comfort in knowing that you can run to God for protection in the storm you find yourself in right now.
I want to leave you with the lyrics to a song my mom used to sing to me as a child when I was afraid:  (It’s an old hymn by Mildred Leightner Dillon)

Safe am I, Safe am I,

In the hollow of His hand;

Sheltered o’er, sheltered o’er

With His love forever more

No ill can harm me, No foe alarm me,

For He keeps both day and night,

Safe am I, safe am I,

In the hollow of His hand.

Today, as the rain falls outside, I hope you’ll remember to rest in God’s sufficiency and His desire to keep you safe.

Several months ago, Abby tried out for her middle school play, The Little Mermaid.  She had her heart set on the part of Ariel and hoped she would get it.  With her recent interest in singing and music, I thought she just might land the roll.

She came home from school the day the parts were posted and never brought it up.  I finally asked, “Abby, so how did the auditions go? Did you get the part?”

Resignedly, she said, “No, mom. I didn’t even get a speaking part.  I’m Chef 3!”

“Chef 3?!?!”

I’ll have to admit, in my mind I was objecting all over the place.  “Seriously?  Boy, they got it wrong!  Non-speaking role?  How can that be any fun?”

I kept my thoughts to myself and just said, “Abby, I’m sure you’ll do a great job as ‘Chef 3′!  I know you had your heart set on more but just do your best at the role you were assigned.”

Still after our conversation, I was bummed for her.  I knew there would be many, many practices.  Although I realize all the roles are important, I wondered how enjoyable it would be for her to wait through each practice just for her scene to come up.

About 2 weeks later, I noticed Abby was home early on a Tuesday.  Tuesday was rehearsal day, so Abby should’ve come home on the activity bus. We were cleaning up before dinner and I said, “Abby, didn’t you have practice today?”  She answered, “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”  I replied, “Well, what do you mean?”  She said, “Well, I’m thinking about dropping out of the play.”

“What?!”

“Well, I actually already did.”

“What do you mean?  Did you tell your teacher you were dropping out?”

“No, I just stopped going to practice.”

This conversation was going south quickly!

Quitting?  Not even telling her drama teacher?!  

I reacted without even thinking, “Abby, we don’t quit things. Just because you don’t like your present situation doesn’t mean you quit.  Your teacher is counting on you.  Does she even know you’ve decided not to be in the play?  Did she reassign your part?”

It was clear Abby thought she had put this whole ordeal behind her…that she had “handled it”.  The fact that we were discussing it made her upset.

(Anyone who’s reading this with a middle school girl can imagine the drama that ensued.)

I’ll be honest, I understood why she quit the play.  Knowing myself, I would’ve been miserable sitting around waiting for my scene while others were acting out more significant roles.  But those feelings didn’t override the understanding that we need to teach our children the value of “sticking with it.”

I needed time to clear my head.  I told her we would talk again when my husband, Mark, got home.  While I prepared dinner I thought, “What do we do?  It’s been almost two weeks.  Surely they would have found a replacement by now.”

I began to pray and verses from God’s Word began coming to my mind.

Proverbs 22:6  Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

Did I want to train Abby to quit things?

Colossians 3:17 And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.

Abby’s teacher knew Abby is a Christian.  What would Jesus do?

Ecclesiastes 9:10a  Whatever you do, do well.

In my heart, I knew God wanted her to fulfill her duty, to be a person of integrity - even at the age of 12.

When Mark came home, I filled him in.  He was disappointed that Abby had just quit without explanation to us or her drama teacher. We knew the way we handled the situation would leave an indelible mark on Abby.  We needed to act wisely.  Thankfully, God is in full supply of wisdom.  He answered my prayer and gave us a plan.

We called Abby in and said, “Abby, God wants us to be true to our word.  He wants us to be reliable.  You are an ambassador of Christ.  Not just your words, but your life reflects Him.  Your teacher is counting on you.  Quitting without notice disrespects her.  It may be too late to get your part back, but you’re going to try. You are going to find your teacher tomorrow at school and apologize for not thinking of her in your decision. You’re also going to ask if your part is still available.  If it is, you’re taking it back.”

Now, there are plenty of times when we’ve had heated discussions with Abby.  I expected her protest strongly…to pull out all the stops.  She did protest, but it seemed that the time we took to figure out what to do was also a time for her to think about things.

The next morning, I wondered if she’d go through with it.  I wondered if she would find her teacher and apologize.  We told Abby we would check to see if she followed through.

After school, Abby arrived home and told us about her conversation with her drama teacher.  She said the part was still hers and that she did apologize for not thinking about her teachers feelings.

I have to tell you, there seemed to be a burden lifted for Abby.  She wasn’t angry that she was “stuck doing the play”.  It was more like she was relieved that what she had done wrong was made right.

That was about 2 months ago.  The play is in just a few weeks.  Practices have picked up and now take up more afternoons each week then they did at first.  Abby doesn’t complain about the play at all.  In fact, one of the other students had to drop out for a reason I don’t know but Abby was assigned her role also.  I love how God works.

So, the point of my blog today is Following through.

Through out the whole ordeal with Abby, I was tempted to just say, “Hey, she shouldn’t have done that.  It’s not good to allow her to quit things.  But I’ll just tell her that next time she is not allowed to quit.  I can just let it slide this time.”  I didn’t like having to put my foot down.  But I knew the importance of follow through.

It’s the same for Abby.  She’s learning the importance of follow through. Even at times when circumstances don’t go her way, she gave her word, so it’s important to follow through.

We all were reminded of a valuable lesson through this ordeal.  I think about my own life.  Are there times I’ve neglected to follow through?  Have I left loose ends? Has someone been counting on me and I’ve dropped the ball?

Maybe today you’re thinking of a situation where you promised something with your words or actions and have yet to follow through.  It DOES matter.  It IS important.  I encourage you, perhaps it’s not too late to make it right.  It’s not too late to follow through.