For those of you that are familiar my blog you are aware that my pen has been silent for a while now. Clearly lack of subject matter is not the cause. Seek God’s closeness is what has and continues to sustain me. This has been a season of stretching and growing. Keeping pace with the nuances of life has caused me to hold my pen in abeyance on this leg of my dynamic ride. It is likely you have had some seasons where twists and turns caused intensity in your life too!

No matter what the comfort remains in the assurance that God knows where we are in life. He knows who we are to Him. He has all of the answers. We are to turn to Him. He is there for you and for me. On this past Sunday, I received an extra tug in my heart to write about an event, which occurred some years ago. I felt compelled to share this encounter after hearing my pastor speak about about “Encounters”.  Encounters of the God kind.

According to the word of God,  as we draw near to God, He will draw near to us. (See James 4: 8) I believe that encounters with God serve to increase our faith. Seeking God’s closeness means we must yield our hearts to Him.

My Encounter 

A family member had invited me to attend a function taking place as part of her church. Similar to a retreat and lasting for a weekend, this activity was called an encounter. Described as a place where one could go to gain closeness with God. I had the time, I had come to respect the teaching of the church group hosting the encounter and most importantly, I definitely  possessed the heartfelt desire to gain more of God, to draw near. I paid the associated fees and was on my way.

Time passed quickly, I had great expectation for connecting more closely with God. One major part of the experience that I was a tad reticent about was, my husband would not attend with me. The event was a women’s encounter, for that reason my husband, no husbands could attend. My husband and I spend a tremendous amount of time together, by choice. We enjoy each other’s company immensely. I was disappointed that he would not attend with me. Seeking God’s closeness indeed.

The Beginning

I was in anticipation of meeting God there in some new way, which would draw me closer. Arriving at the venue early, I checked into my room and took a seat in the cozy meeting room at the hotel. I prefer sitting as close to the front as I can at such events. I remember being in the front row on the right side of the room. As the room began to fill with women, the buzzing sound of conversations was like a rhythm, a calm, peaceful sound.

The first speaker came forward. She welcomed us and expressed her excitement for the events scheduled to take place over the next few days. The encounter would end with all of us attending the church’s regular service on Sunday.

Next the pastor’s wife came to the podium, she spoke and provided more details about the annual encounter. At the end of her brief comments the pastor came forward. My thoughts must have gone to a place of distraction inside my head. My thoughts focused on the fact that my husband was not in attendance at the event. I recall thinking, “Why is it that she can see her husband over the weekend while I can not even speak to mine over the phone.

There were few stipulations about the experience. One that gave me particular pause was related to no contact with the outside world. Each of us agreed once we checked into the hotel, we would not use our cell phones or other electronic devices. The main focus was gaining closeness with God. While I did comply, I was not thrilled about totally disconnecting from my beloved husband. Again my thoughts returned to the comments of the pastor.

He spoke of the role of women in the family. Likewise, the importance of women. He mentioned what an impact this encounter could likely have, if we would seek God. We were told that members of the church had prayed for us to encounter God in a way we had never experienced. Much of what the pastor spoke about touched me. My thoughts were back on my reason for being there, closeness with God. The pastor clearly stated women had been mistreated. He specifically highlighted women had been battered, sexually assaulted and molested as children. Further, he said that he wanted to represent those men that had engaged in the harm, by requesting forgiveness for the hurtful acts committed against the women assembled in the room.

Too Close For Comfort?

These issues were familiar to me. As a child I was the victim of or witness to significant mental, physical and spiritual abuse at the hand of my natural father, I thought to myself, “Well, that is a nice little exercise!” These thoughts were expressed with deliberate sarcasm, even as I spoke to myself. My thoughts began to drift again to my room and the rest I planned after a hectic week.

The pastor moved to the only exit in the room, which was behind me at the back of the room. The room contained more chairs than than women.  There were approximately 50 women in the room.  As the women filed past the pastor, now standing at the rear of the room,  he said, “Forgive me! He continued to repeat those words. Each woman acknowledged him in some way and continued, quickly past him out of the door. Now this almost seemed too close for comfort.

I stood to go to the end of the aisle and head back to my room for the night. As I walked to the end of the row and turned my body to approach the exit my feet would not move. It was as if I did not have the power to move. Standing motionless, I could only look at the pastor. Seems like time halted completely.

I was stuck there in my tracks! My body remained frozen. I was able to view the other women leaving the room and nothing more. I realized everyone else had moved beyond the pastor. My awareness of others became diminished. As if the one asking for forgiveness and I were alone.

Breakthrough

The pastor’s words became an impassioned plea, as he made direct eye contact with me. Again “Forgive me! Forgive me! Forgive me!’ He repeated over and over and over. I felt his words, as if they penetrated my heart. Tears began to flow from my eyes. He fell to his knees, pleading with me. He became visibly contrite.

Somehow my feet were loosed, my steps were labored as if cement weights were tied to them.  I began to sob. As I moved closer his eyes and mine were intently locked. He stood, and with the arms of a loving father, he held me as I cried, shaking uncontrollably. After some time, I said, “I forgive you!”

My father had never been contrite for the years of abuse. Never having asked me for forgiveness, he transitioned from this earth at the age of 80 years. This encounter took place long after. I thought that I had reached full healing. Believed I had forgiven him totally. On that Friday evening, I knew that God had allowed me more of closeness. More distance from the pain of the abuse I had experienced and relived for decades. God’s closeness indeed!

Your Encounters

This encounter took place within the first hour of that weekend. As we seek Him we draw near to Him. In turn, He draws near to us. The release I experienced on that night moved me exponentially closer to God and the healing I was seeking. In that one evening a virtual stranger was able to glorify God and bring me closer to His promises.

I ask you to share one of your encounters with me and with others. Be encouraged, this encounter and numerous others grow our faith and remind us that God is here for us and with us! Is it time for an encounter? Continue to be a seeker, continue to give God glory, continue to draw near to Him.  Continue to love your neighbor as yourself.

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving my neighbor as yourself.”

The post Seeking God’s Closeness appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.

Gratitude is a component of love. It benefits the one that gives as well as the one that receives. All aspects of love are beneficial. The positive outcomes of gratitude flow from the giver to the receiver, like a current that travels through a simple electrical circuit. Throughout the Bible four types of love are defined. Those four categories of love are: agape, eros, philio and storge (for a detailed breakdown of these loves,  get a copy of my book, What do they think we are Peanuts or something?) Every type of love thrives in an environment where its expression is reciprocated. Mature love succeeds even when it is unrequited. Gratitude, like love, is a gift that keeps giving even if it may not always be accepted.

No Instruction Required

We know how to get right from the start. As we enter this world we are self-centered little bundles, focused on how we can get our needs met. No formal instruction is required. Our comfort, food, and shelter all depend on someone else. While cradled in utero we were cared for once we emerged from the womb; kicking, screaming or crying were a frequent mode of communication utilized. Clearly on occasion, we were not sure what our needs involved, nor were we aware what had created the lack however, we would call upon caregivers to have a remedy. We arrive on the planet with the ability to make it known we want to get something, without regard for what it takes to fulfill our need.

In time we come to a greater understanding; we are not the center of the universe. That understanding may not manifest in tandem with any precise chronological age.  Some appear to be aware of this truth before they can speak, while others project an impression they are to be catered to incessantly. They are well entrenched in their existence of selfishness, untouched by the inclination to give any part of themselves to others. These individuals are generally identified with annoying habits that are all about self-gratification. When we encounter individuals with this type of motivation it appears they lack genuine understanding of what is truly important in life.

What is the underlining purpose of living a life solely focused on what one can get? Indeed, a virtuous life includes outward expressions of good will, with the intention of adding to the happiness of others through a proper sense of duty. As you manifest God’s purpose in our lives the growth of love and its components are stirred. Gratitude is a gift that keeps giving.

Gratitude Requires Practice

Just as we each have our own strengths and abilities, giving and receiving love is one of those, we can choose to honor said gifting or not. It nonetheless remains a gift that keeps giving.

The ability to be grateful is a quality of love we all possess. In fact, it is part of our purpose for being. Giving does not “come naturally” to us. We have the freedom to choose our actions. God gave us freewill.  The ability to exercise our freewill is one indicator that we are more than androids. While we can choose our behaviors, we cannot always see (nor choose) the consequences which accompany our choices.

Freewill allows us to live lives void of gratitude. To be in an attitude of gratitude it takes effort. We are directed in the Bible to give thanks in everything, for that is the will of God. When we align our will with the will of God we are said to abide in Him. As we abide in Him, He abides in us. It is when He abides in us that we become His disciples. As His disciples we follow His commandment to love one another. (John 15:1-17) We must practice love. We must practice gratitude. It is a choice. We can choose a gift that keeps giving the love God commands us to give.

What Does Scientific Research Show?

According to Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D., said to be the world’s leading scientific expert on gratitude, in his article, “What gets in the way of Gratitude?” there is a connection between humility and gratitude. Through research he finds that, “People who are ungrateful tend to be characterized by an excessive sense of self-importance, arrogance, vanity, and an unquenchable need for admiration and approval. Narcissists reject the ties that bind people into relationships of reciprocity. They expect special favors and feel no need to pay back or pay forward.”

Research also shows the benefits of showing gratitude. Here is a list of seven benefits attained from showing gratitude as noted by Amy Morin, in Forbes Magazine:

1. Gratitude opens the door to more relationships.
2. Gratitude improves physical health.
3. Gratitude improves psychological health.
4. Gratitude enhances empathy and reduces aggression.
5. Grateful people sleep better.
6. Gratitude improves self-esteem.
7. Gratitude increases mental strength.

Give it as Often as You Can

Which of these attributes could you use more of in your life? Gratitude is a gift that keeps giving! Those gifts nurture us and others. To improve your quality of life, give it as often as you can. Although it is your choice.

There is a song that stirred me into a posture of gratitude the first time I heard it. I had gone to visit my cousin Iris. She shared the song with me. That day I was so moved that she gave me her only copy of the song. Every time I hear the song it stirs me to show gratitude.  I am grateful to Iris for sharing it with me!

I hope that you were stirred to be grateful. As you listened what came to mind for you? Who or what were you reminded of that you can give gratitude for? Reach out, give thanks, show your gratitude. It is part of love, the gift that keeps giving!

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”

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The post A Gift That Keeps Giving, Give it as Often as You Can appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.

Social Beings

We are constantly being made aware of situations where people risk their lives and sanity to become part of a group.  Fraternity hazing, which turns deadly, is a tragic example of going along with what is wrong to belong. News stories are replete with disturbing details of individuals electing to take their own life through suicide, often attributed to being ostracized. Apparently, exclusion or a perception of loneliness is the reasoning. Could it be those incidents occurred because of a lack of a true ride or die relationship? Who are your compadres?

Different Stokes for Different Folks

Ride or die, on the face of it implies either one will do something or die. From a motorcycle rider’s view point the meaning was, one would rather die than not be riding on their prized bike. In the predominant vernacular, ride or die refers to remaining loyal to someone, no matter what the consequences.

Do you have someone in your life that is your ride or die? Someone who would stand by you, even if that stance could lead to their death? Are you that person, loyal to another, willing to stand with them even if the result of said stance is likely to result in your death? With whom are you in a ride or die relationship? Is it a mutual, equal partnership or is it one-sided?

At the Movies

These types of relationships speak to us at the movies. I recall the closing scene from “Thelma and Louise”, a 1991 film staring Geena Davis and Susan Sarandon. Written by Callie Khouri, the gripping story depicted the incidents of one weekend that caused several lives to be lost.  Indeed, Thelma and Louise were two women in a ride or die relationship.

Is there anyone that you are willing to ride to the end with or die trying? What causes one to make a commitment like that? Is there any one issue you would stand by no matter what? Is there any person you would stand alongside, no matter what they do? Is there someone in your life that you can count on in both good and bad times, whether you are right, or wrong? Would your relationship be binge watched, by animated throngs, transfixed on the screen? What could make a better story?

Authentic

Have you encountered an authentic, ride or die relationship when you are not at the movies?  Is there one with whom we can all have a ride or die relationship? One that knows us fully? One who is willing to pay the ultimate price for us? One that wants only the best life for us? An authentic friend, is there any?

A friend is one who brings out the best in you. A friend understands how you are wired. A friend enables you see the stunning gifts you have packaged within. A friend understands your tears and your laughter. A friend shares an unspoken language. A friend hears you when you do not speak.

I am not sure I have seen that kind of friend at the movie theater. The friend we have in JESUS is unlike any other, forever and ever.

Love, faithfulness, fulfillment, and grace; no more betrayal.

The ride or die relationship with Him is truly authentic. He has already died for us! The ultimate, bona fide, original, ride or die relationship is possible through the one called JESUS, the Christ.

It is my prayer that you know that relationship now and forever.

Who truly has your back?

Seek Him and His truth. Open your heart to Him. Knowing Him is part of loving yourself. Authentically love yourself and your neighbor. Know that as you ride this journey of life, someone does have your back no matter what. Read the word, the Bible. Ask for understanding of the support that is already there for you.

You are never alone. The closeness that you have with Jesus will grow as you nurture that relationship. That which you focus upon will grow. Be an active participant in the ultimate ride or die relationship. Having an authentic ride or die relationship with Jesus is a stunningly, expensive gift we are not required to pay for. However, there are terms and conditions in the ultimate ride or die. Who truly has your back? How do you know for sure?

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”

The post Ride or Die – The Ultimate appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.

As we begin to embrace 2018 please pause to reflect on what has brought you to this moment in your life. Look in the mirror. See beyond 2017, go back as far as you can remember. It is my prayer that you will truly set aside a few moments to read this entry with deliberate focus. Open your heart and invest in your life, and countless lives of others; by so doing. What do you see when you look in the mirror?

Not so Pretty Pictures

Think about those times when you have been hurt; some of the pain remains, still. Remember the times you were able to elevate yourself and transcend the negative situations. Really take some time to recall. Go again to the vulnerable places, the scenes where you thought it would surely be the end of you. I am aware this is a daunting task however, viewing these not so pretty pictures will be of use.

Allow yourself to feel the emptiness, the pain, the despair. Visualize the faces of those who have said and done unspeakable things to you. Those that seemingly went out of their way to create a virtual “hell on earth”, for you. Sit with those feelings. See the faces, revisit the emotions. Go ahead, recount the feelings.

Now, as heart-rending as those thoughts are, I ask you to take on another task. Rather, I entreat you to (as you remain in this emotive posture) approach the more significant aspect of those powerful emotions. Focus on the shocking reality that you too have caused others the same kind of pain, or perhaps even more.

Yes, you and I have caused others to feel similarly towards us. The loathsome behavior we have found in others is part of our conduct as well. We have inflicted unspeakable pain on others, including our family, our friends, acquaintances, strangers. By intent or accident. We all have, most assuredly impacted someone else’s life in the same hurtful manner. There are others, feeling like you, affirming their pain is attributable to you.

You may be thinking, “I am a good person, I have not done anything like ____________ (fill in with the name of someone that has really hurt you) did to me.” Maybe you are unable to phathom how I could even hint at such a thing and be serious. We have all been on the giving and receiving end of unloving acts. Look closely, what do you see when you look in the mirror?

Are you exempt?

Possibly you believe you are the exception and my words are errant opinion rather than fact. God’s word is true. The word of God clearly informs us about who we are. Our Maker, familiar with how we were made affirms who is a good person. Our Father, the omniscient one, speaks to us in truth not opinion.

Notice what is plainly stated in the following verses:

Mark 10:18, “And Jesus said unto him, Why callest thou me good? there is none good but one, that is, God.” (King James Version)

Romans 3:23, “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God.” (King James Version)

Isaiah 64:6 “But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.” (King James Version)

Jesus clearly indicates that He is not even to be called good. In the account recorded in Mark, only God is good. We can probably agree that to comprehend the word “one” in that passage there is no need to do exhaustive research, one means one. God alone is good. He is the good one.

Likewise, all is inclusive. That refers to you and I in Romans chapter 23, we have all sinned. Isaiah goes on to indicate we are like filthy rags; soiled. Suggesting we are tattered, torn, and unclean. We are in need of repair and cleansing. Jesus came to earth for that purpose.

Are you exempt from the love of God? Are you exempt from the healing and cleansing?  He sent His Son to earth that you might be saved. What do you see when you look in the mirror? What can you do about what you see?

Use the Proper Measure

It is common to measure ourselves against others. We look around and compare our lives to what we perceive the lives of others to be. This practice takes away valuable energies that can be used to improve our lives. Additionally, it fails to align with the word of God. We are to use His word as our guide our measure. What do you see when look in the mirror? Do you measure yourself by His standard?

Moving into 2018 let us view God’s way of being and do right. Seek first His kingdom. Prayerfully search His word, listen for His reply, and respond to His direction. Repent for those things that you have done that have caused others pain in 2017 (and beyond). Forgive those that have somehow caused you to be in pain. Looking in the mirror will help you to see where you have been. Looking to God will affirm who you are and guide you to His perfect plan for your life. What do you see when you look in the mirror? What will you do about what you see in the mirror? Plan for what your reflection will be as you move to the end of 2018.

Take Inventory and Take Action!

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”

The post What do you see as you look in the mirror? appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.

Why not try a soft opening this year? As we quickly approach the dawning of 2018, aside from thinking about how quickly this year seems to have advanced, I am taking inventory of my actions over the past year. What went well? What could I do better and what opportunities do I have to improve? These are some of the queries I ponder. In so doing, I have decided to take preemptive action. A December “soft opening” came to mind.

A local restaurant had a soft opening last week. There was no major advertising, no fanfare there was only  a short blurb on a community web service that features neighborhood events. While I did not attend, I heard that there was a long wait for service, wait staff was unfamiliar with the menu, some items lacked appropriate portion size and flavor. I get that this was the restaurant’s first attempt at opening its doors and the likelihood of them getting a Michelin Star for their performance was nonexistent. However, some part of me thought, it would have been phenomenal if they could have at least done a good job considering it was a soft opening.

Yet having this dress rehearsal (of sorts) allows them to identify areas they can finetune, before the official launch. Once the doors open, surely the quality of the restaurant will be expected to be higher. The expectations of customers will be higher. They will not be readily given a pass on poor service for food that lacks the basics. Surely the plan is to succeed.

Plan to Succeed

There is an adage, generally credited to Benjamin Franklin, “If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.” Focusing, deliberately on what we desire to achieve, with consistent effort increases the likelihood that we will succeed.   

What if we could likewise get an earlier start on getting out the kinks before that unofficial window of New Year’s resolutions opens? Make no mistake, I am not of the opinion that we should wait until we welcome a particular date on the calendar to begin affirming we will make improvements in our lives. Yet during the first weeks of 2018 it seems, as is common practice,  in years past, we announce “My New Year’s resolution is to…“ followed by something embraced in January that appears we have lost sight of by March!

Perhaps planning a soft opening, in December, would allow us to begin the fine tuning earlier, so that when the “official” avalanche of energy around resolutions comes (around mid-January), our efforts would gain momentum. Those resolutions do not become a reality on their own.It does take a real strategy to make them come to pass. Having some form of a soft opening would give us a head start on practicing those strategies.

The more I experience life the clearer it becomes to me that taking inventory of my life through my thoughts and actions is extremely vital. The way of a healthy person must include looking at one’s life in order to improve it. When we refuse to see how our actions and thoughts contribute to undesirable outcomes we experience we are almost destined to repeat them.

Examine Yourself

We are told in 2 Corinthians 13:5 “Examine yourselves, whether ye be in the faith; prove your own selves. Know ye not your own selves, how that Jesus Christ is in you, except ye be reprobates?” (KJV) When we examine ourselves what does that mean? The benefits of examining ourselves includes allowing us to see who we really are and whose we really are.

The purpose of the soft opening is to allow the restaurateur the ability to verify where they are on target for success. As we walk on this journey of life, we are to drop the failures of the past. We are to search for God’s perfect will for the future. Set your course now, for a soft opening. What is His official plan for you in 2018? Look forward to what He wants you to do. Reach forward, with deliberate intention. Focus on His plan for “good success”.

Review the many events and actions that have brought you to this point. As you read this post perhaps things have come to mind that you would like to have changed. Perhaps dreams of touching the lives of others in ways God has shown you. Examine the good, the bad and the not so pretty. Repent for those misdeeds. Rejoice for God’s love. Request His guidance for good success. Think on the things of God. Press toward the mark.

Have a phenomenal opening in 2018! Preface it with a soft opening, which illustrates your deliberate, consistent, focus on following our loving Father’s plan for good success!

Do you plan to succeed? Take Inventory and Take Action!

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”

The post Soft Opening, Planning for Good Success appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.

Though my keyboard has been silent in this venue for a bit longer than I would like, it is not due to lack of something to say. Indeed I have had something to shout! This time of silence has shown me how silence is golden.

As best we know the full version of the proverb states something like, “Speech is silver, but silence is golden.” It is thought to have come from ancient Egypt. There are times when proverbs are heard, in part, and not fully applied. It also occurs that one might place a particular meaning to the same proverb in various circumstances.

Acquaintances, at times have reported to me that I am quiet. Others who know me more intimately would disagree. Certainly those closest to me may believe that I should dial it back at times. No offense taken at either of those statements. It probably indicates that I too am human, and imperfect.

Nothing to Say?

Here I find it nourishing to express myself. In this forum, one can read, or not. One can read a portion or all, some or none. I have been unable to post for a few months. It is not because there was nothing to say, on the contrary there has been much to comment about.

Globally: earthquakes, wars, rumors of wars, lack of provisions, loss of possessions, economic challenges,  homelessness, death, illness, wellness, health, and diverse weather conditions. Personally: new beginnings, greater understanding, abundance, transitions, loss, gain, stress and relief. Much has happened over the past several months.

I believe you can readily see the good, the bad and the ugly that resides in your world these days too. If you have not been touched directly with part of the tragedy which is looming around this world, then you know one or more people who have been and are being greatly impacted.

During this time I have especially been focused on what it is I need to say or do. I have asked God to show me what it is He wants me to speak of here. For a long period there was what I believed to be silence. I spent some time listening. More time was occupied by distractions. Life got in the way of my regular Bible Study, and devotional time. I was not in direct communication with God as often. Full disclosure; I allowed myself to be distracted.

Asked and Answered

What I chose to read as God’s silence was my choice to not include Him in His proper place in my life.  I had allowed other concerns to be in the forefront of my mind. Thereby giving Him room in a lesser spot in the queue than The Almighty God requires. Yet even as I thought I stretched my ears to hear Him, I failed to draw closer to Him. He could only here silence. I was aware that He knew I was asking and confident He possessed the answers. Not hearing what I deemed as the appropriate answers I kept listening and asking.

I was attempting to apply silence is golden to my situation. I began trying to figure out how this silence was golden I began to see the many ways that God has talked to me in the past. I reminisced to examine the times when I believed Him to have been silent. The silence began to cause my ears to ring with His love. God is love. His love for us is expressed through the sacrifice of Jesus the Christ. By His definition, in His word we are told what the attributes of love are in 1 Corinthians 13:4 through 8-b.

I heard Him speak to me clearly through the silence. Silence is golden.  He is always talking to us. I am now certain He was talking to me consistently, even as I asked I heard, but I failed to listen, at first. Everything about Him is good, even what I read as His silence, is golden.

One and Only

Early in the Bible, when God dealt with Moses, we are instructed to have no other God before Him. None in the form of graven images. Although the word speaks of many customs of the time, including sacrifice to molten images, the principle is clear. No other Gods will be before Him.

Jealous

The words also express that Gods name is jealous in Exodus 34:14. In several places, He has told us in His word that He is a jealous God. We sometimes think of jealousy as a petty emotion. In 1Corinthians 11:2 we are plainly informed of His Godly jealousy. Jealousy has to do with one wanting something that rightfully belongs to them. Do we belong to Him because of the sacrifice of His son?  Do we belong to Him because we were made in His image? Do we believe the Bible?

Serving Two Masters

If it is your understanding that it is alright with God for you to allow life, as it were, to cause you to forget about Him, leaving only a place in your life after actions that involve the pursuit of riches, think again. He has told us that we cannot serve two masters. We are unable to have a 9 to 5 God, a worship day God and a whenever I need Him to be first God. His economy does not work in that manner.

What I found, or rather reintroduced myself to, as if clasped with outstretched palm was, God is never silent. His voice is always available to us through His written word the Bible. We have access through the rhema word He has given us in the past.

When is Silence Golden?

Silence is golden when we are able to bring ourselves closer to God and His kingdom work. It is golden when we can unplug from the many distractions of this noisy world, with its numerous, deafening sounds of confusion, bereft of love.

Please share with me some of the ways you have come to realize silence is golden. Let us break the silence of what God’s love has done in our lives. Help others to get to know Him too.

Take Inventory and Take Action!

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”

The post When Silence is Golden appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.

An entire genre of music came about as people expressed their pain, and suffering. “Lonely Avenue” a song written by Doc Pomus, has a riveting rendition embodied by Ray Charles, which gives us a clear sense of what it is like to feel disconnected. Listen to it here:

This blues song written in the 1960s stirs one to reminisce of a time when they were a resident on that very avenue. Blues resonates with each of us to some degree. Our ability to connect, one with another, heart-to-heart, causes the cavern that is loneliness to transformed; to shallow.

Whether it be a romantic relationship, or platonic, the feelings of loneliness, even in a room fully occupied by others, are not foreign to us.

The lyrics speak of a room with windows and yet no sunshine ever comes through, how can that be? What causes some to basque in the beauty of the light while others in the same room can be in utter darkness? How can we combat the all to universal pain of loneliness, either in ourselves or others? Connecting heart-to-heart is a remedy. We help ourselves and others when we connect on a heart-to-heart level.

It can be that you are not in that place of loneliness, in a room cloaked in darkness, with multiple windows. You may not be experiencing the depth of a lonely avenue, yet some of your relationships are not as full as they can be. Perhaps family, friends, co-workers or even strangers you encounter in your daily activities are residents on Lonely Avenue.

Connections – Only Clicks Away

The world contains more than seven billion people wired to connect with others. We reach out to others in various ways. Seventeenth-century English author John Donne wrote, “No man is an island…” Yes, each of us touches another. Some connect frequently in person, as is reflected in physical gatherings. Many connect on social media platforms. Approximately two and one half billion people are connected to various forms of social media.  

People report that they are on social media platforms for various reasons. It is estimated that the average person will spend more than five years on social media in their lifetime. However, there are times when we all feel alone. Could it be that some of the need to accumulate friends and followers relates to our desire to be connected to others? Is it possible that all of those clicks are a way for us to have a sense of connection?

Studies have shown that the more we connect to social media the more socially isolated we may become.

Heart-to-Heart Connection 

We were created to love and be loved. We were created in the likeness of God who is love. We have been commanded to love our neighbor as ourselves. While some of those click connections serve a valuable purpose of linking to others, a craving remains to connect on a more intimate level, heart-to-heart. Those heart-to-heart connections are what truly sustain us. Laughter, encouragement, pain and shared experiences on a personal level with others creates authentic connections that carry us through the twists and turns of life.

Often these authentic connections come through a spouse, family member, the workplace, our community or other routine interactions. This type of heart-to-heart communion is when we are able to share intimate thoughts and feelings. These kinds of connections can also occur with people you have never met before.

Recently I was on the phone with a service provider’s customer service representative. I was asking questions about a bill and trying to make an informed choice about changing my service commitment to this company. As a former customer service supervisor and trainer of customer service representatives I have a keen sense of service levels from exceptional to mediocre. Over the years I have become more likely to ask to speak to a supervisor to report great service. God has, in response to my seeking His way of doing and being right, done a great work on my heart. It continues to be an area of work in progress.

I have come to a point where I go out of my way to be open to the fact that the customer service representative deserves my patience, kindness and understanding. Directing my energies to make the encounter pleasant is my goal.

My first impression of the representative, ( I will call Sheila) based on the first minute of the call, was she had an attitude of apathy mixed with a combat ready stance. As I spoke with Sheila, I focused on the information I needed. Sprinkled in the conversation was my constant reminder, to myself, that I was to treat her with respect (Godly love). Finally, about 15 minutes into the call, before I got all of my questions answered, I decided to end the call. During the call as I reflected continually on my posture my heart was moved. I realized I sensed something beneath the aggressive behavior, a woundedness. A heart-to-heart connection.

At that moment I began to speak words, unplanned, in a loving tone, “Thank you Sheila for your help. I heard something during this call. I am not sure what you are going through now, but I will be praying for you. It is my gift to you and you do not need to respond.” I got it out in one breath, not knowing how it would be received. As I took a breath she said something that I did not fully understand until I had hung up. Sheila said, “ I am crying.” I then quickly told her to have an outstanding day. I heard her pressing buttons as if she were going unavailable before another call could drop into her queue.

We connected on a heart-to-heart level. My actions gave God a place to do His work! He gets the glory! I was quite moved then and as I recount the events here I am emotional again. I could have behaved like an obnoxious customer, it was not something that in the past was completely foreign to me. I have been on both sides of that type of interaction as the sender and the receiver of a far less than cordial exchange. I am not proud of my actions, nonetheless I am elated by the transformation.

Win-Win

However, because I was willing to make a connection, heart-to-heart with another individual, my neighbor, God blessed her and he blessed me. The fruits from that act of love to her continues. Over the past week or so since the incident I bring her and her situation before our Father in prayer. His word says that we reap what we sow, I believe it.

When you encounter someone like Sheila, with God’s prompting make that heart-to-heart connection. Understand that you may never see them again. They may never say thank you, you may never get a certificate or accolades, at least not in the form of clicks or likes. As the folks at Nike so eloquently say “Just do it”!

What would happen if we all made heart-to-heart connections with those that we see on a daily basis, randomly with no expectation of remuneration? I challenge you to see how many heart-to-heart connections you can make over the next three weeks. Please track your connections and drop me a note letting me know what your number means to you. Make connections without clicks, rather with love in your heart. God is faithful. His promises to those who are obedient to His word apply to you! Study His word. Do His will. Love your neighbor as you love yourself. Be blessed! Heart-to-heart connections chase the blues away!

Take Inventory and Take Action!

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”

The post Heart-to-Heart Connections appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.

The commitment required to establish the words “In God We Trust” on coins in the 1800s was significant.  In 1956 “In God We Trust” became our nation’s motto. President Dwight Eisenhower approved a joint resolution passed by Congress declaring “In God We Trust” must appear on American currency. Clearly the individuals that enacted such legislation were focused on declaring the association of “Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness” (affirmed in the United States Declaration of Independence) with God. Said liberties they reportedly had journeyed to America in search of.

Those individuals, had an understanding that trust in God was a concept worthy of declaring and keeping before each of us regularly. Today we probably see those words far less than decades ago when buying and selling did not involve as much use of plastic cards and electronic devices. A dollar bill, changing hands at least once a day would result in being touched by about 1,000 people within its lifespan of about three years. Adding use of coins to that figure and bills of other denominations would increase that number. Repetition is a good way to remember information. So repeated exposure to the phrase “In God We Trust” probably helped to keep the principle of trusting in God in the forefront of our minds.

What is Trust?

Synonymous with trust is faith or having a firm belief in someone or something. Being able to bank on someone being there for us is the ultimate level of trust. When we begin to think about why we have issues around trust, what comes to mind? Trust issues go back as far as our memory of relationships. Our parents and family of origin was likely the seed that grew into the first notions we have of trust.

Being born into an imperfect family with flaws and living as an imperfect individual with flaws, it is not easy to develop a concept of what trust looks like. With much pain, the doubt and betrayal that result from misplaced trust is learned. Vulnerability is linked to trust; without it we cannot know that we trust. Patterns develop where vulnerability leads to betrayal, which in turn weakens out desire to trust in others. Then instead of seeking what we wish to find, we sometimes look for situations to validate the negative outcomes we dread. We become part of new unhealthy relationships or derail those that could grow healthier over time if they were properly watered and nurtured.

Healthy relationships are built upon trust. The ability to rely on someone to care for our needs or consistently respond in ways that help us is what trust is all about. Relationships at work, in business, or with family, friends, spouses, children, parents, neighbors and so forth are strongest when mutual trust is present.

Love and Trust

We can trust without love, but can we love without trust? Who or what do you trust? Really, when you are in that moment of having done all you know to do and you see that you need help, where, to whom do you turn? When you need a moment to collect your thoughts or get away from the pressures of day-to-day living, what is your place of retreat? On whom do you rely? From whom or what, do you gather your strength?

Our loving Father, God, is love. (1John 4:8) We were made in His very image. (Genesis 1:26) He knows how we were wired. He knows what causes us to live the best life. He admonishes us to seek Him first and all of His righteousness and whatever we need will be added. (Matthew 6:33)

Can you trust in God? Yes! Will you trust in God? That is a question only you can answer. It is a capacity possessed by all. So you get to choose. The Bible is filled with stories of people like you and I. Some chose to trust in God. Others did not. Do you have trust issues that cause you to think you only have a slim choice between a rock and a hard place?

Do you have trust issues? Could it be that you have misplaced your trust. Our God is infallible, He sees the whole picture. He knows you, He made you. Whatever it takes for you to humble yourself and trust Him more fully, it is worth it. On that you can rely. We have been told to be of good cheer for He has overcome it all. (John 16:33) When we truly trust in God, we rely on Him, we rely on His word, and we rely on His promises. He is available to each of us.

Take Inventory and Take Action! Where is your commitment? We are to allow our valuable lives to proclaim in every encounter, in every relationship, to all, “In God We Trust”!

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”

Please contact me if you need help building your trust.

The post “In God We Trust”, Really, or do we Have Trust Issues? appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.

On Valentine’s Day many people are looking for the invitation to “be mine”! The history of the Valentine card as we generally know it today appears to go back to the 1400s. It was a way for one to send an amorous address to another. Usually written in poetic terms. Charles, Duke of Orleans is said to have sent the first recorded Valentines to his wife, as he was in captivity in the Tower of London during The Hundred Year War. His loving sentiments to his wife lasted for 25 years during his imprisonment in the tower.

You may like flowers, candy or big surprises. Dinner at a romantic restaurant or intimate time spent with those you love may all be on your list of things to do today. Being thought of through acts of love are appreciated by the giver and the receiver on any day. For both parties, the one expressing love and the object of that wholesome affection; both benefit from the love shared. Healthy relationships improve the quality of life.

How we are Wired

Love is one of our basic human needs. We are designed to be on both the giving and receiving end of love.  We were made in the image of a God, who is the essence of love. That means that we are wired for love! So it is no wonder that when we have an opportunity to focus on being showered with love, or pour love onto others, attention is placed in that regard.

Whether you are expecting to receive or planning to give gifts on February 14^th there tends to be an excitement in the air. Even if you are not thinking about a romantic relationship there is something about love in the air that is stimulating. When we are in the presence of others that have a genuine love between them it is palpable. We are drawn to individuals because of the love they show to us. One generally finds a way to communicate “be mine” to those that display true unconditional love.

The Original Valentine

Far earlier than what has become commonly known as the original Valentine sent by Charles the Duke of Orleans, a stronger, more widely known record of an amorous address from one to many was recorded. We know that document to be the Bible. Indeed the word of Love. Our loving Creator has provided us with numerous ways to know Him and His love. It is written that we shall not live by bread alone but by every word that comes from the mouth of God. Our loving Father has provided us with the ability to live a life knowing His love. His Valentine is available. We get to know His love through His Word. We also get to know His love through a personal relationship with Him.

Do you have a personal relationship with Him? You do have the ability to know the joy of receiving His unconditional love. Are you personally familiar with the Greatest Love Story ever told?

Your very life depends upon your relationship with our Creator.  He has asked each of us to “be mine”. Yet although He is God Almighty, He allows us to make choices. He allows us the freedom to choose how our story will end and how we accept and operate in His love until then. He originally expressed His love for us, by presenting His only begotten Son, as a blameless, sacrifice for each of us. He will not force us to return that His love. He gives. We are drawn to Him, yet we get to choose.

On this day when so many are focused on red, hearts, flowers, candy and cards is your attention on the giver of the ultimate love? Are you responding to that love by living a life of love? If you are feeling that you need to gain or improve your relationship with our loving Father, make a heartfelt, plea to Him. Repent of your sins, acknowledge Jesus the Christ as the Son of God, now raised from the dead, and the Lord of your life. Ask Him to “Be Mine”. His son was sent to save us. His gift is free. However, we have to make the choice to receive it. He is so loving He will not force us.

Especially today, direct your thoughts to He that is LOVE.

Take Inventory and Take Action!

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your enemy as yourself.”

The post On Valentine’s Day, He Says, “Be Mine” appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.

As we come to the end of 2016 it is wise to take some time to reflect. We probably have as many if not more concerns than we had last year at this time. I am making a list and checking it twice; over the next several days! My list has nothing to do with the behaviors of others. I am not focused on who has been naughty or nice. My focus is outward and upward. Planning for a better year.

This year, like most others in my memory bank, has had its challenges, joys and disappointments. The times I want to revisit again, those I want to distance myself from, and those I would rather blend into the backdrop of my life. As I recount the years, one constant is God’s love. On my darkest days or the most difficult seasons in life, He has always been there, constantly assuring me of His love. His Word affirms us that He will not leave us nor forsake us.

That is a promise that I have seen kept throughout my life! No matter how deep the valley, no matter how lofty the mountain, He has never left me nor forsaken me, not ever.

Have there been times when I thought all was lost? Have I been at the end of myself with no ideas of what would be my next steps? Have I imagined the very end of life was near? Indeed! No doubt you have too!

Part of our shared human condition dictates that we have triumphs and challenges in this life. However, His Word reminds us that even though we have great trouble or suffering, He has conquered this world. What a comfort those words are to me.

Been Through Some Trouble?

I know those words to be more than rhetoric. I have experienced tribulation (the word used in the passage above, found in several translations of John 16:33). How about you, have you had great trouble, suffering or tribulation? How did you move forward?

Perhaps you have just come out of a season of tribulation, you are still there or you can see it on the horizon. The words of Jesus as recorded by John in Chapter 16 verse 33 indicate that we will have trouble in this world. Therefore if you are not in that season now, at some point it will be upon you.

Making a List?

I am making a list and checking it twice. My list has to do with the situations during 2016 where God has illustrated to me His love as expressed in actions of: faithfulness, grace, favor, kindness and mercy. As I take inventory and take action over the next several days, I desire to limit my recollections to the timeframe of the last twelve months.

I plan to list the blessings that seem to come from nowhere. The times when doors were opened, and those that were rightfully closed. I propose to list the times that I conceived of solutions that I came to know would not have worked. I intend to list the sins I committed that my loving Father removed from me because of His promise related to repentance. I aim to praise Him for the unmerited favor He has given me, more times than I can even count.  

I plan to praise Him for His greatness!  Not only at this time of year, but especially at this time of year I will praise Him! I am making a list and checking it twice!

It is my desire, like never before, to list, rehearse and acknowledge the goodness of God. Making a list and checking it twice!

Planning for a Better Year

Allow your list to be a reference tool for the troubles, which will come in the future. As you refer back on your list you will inspire patience and fortitude during your new tribulations. Indeed, they will come.

Let us all deliberately prepare to succeed in the New Year as we walk by faith into new opportunities to rely on our Heavenly Father. As we follow His will in our lives He has promised us many things. As we love ourselves first by looking at the victories on the list we will be empowered to draw closer to God, examine ourselves and sow good seeds. We are promised to reap what we sow.

Take Inventory and Take Action! There is still time before we enter 2017 for those ready to begin, making a list and checking it twice!

Love,

Deborah

“Lighting the path to loving your neighbor as yourself.”

The post Making a List and Checking it Twice, Planning for a Better Year appeared first on MapsandLanterns.org.