1. I do not consider myself an “author” as there is nothing in a bound book with my name on it (yet). However, I do consider myself a “writer”.
2. I have read the entire Twilight series. Painfully. It hurt my soul.
3. I actually enjoyed the first book in the Twilight series. There was so much room for conflict and character growth.
4. For the most part, I do not enjoy fan fiction, but I do enjoy the crappy teenage television dramas that a lot of fan fiction is written around. While it may not be my thing, I understand those who are drawn to it. I get it.
5. Bella Swan is the single most annoying character I have ever encountered in a novel.
6. I have read exactly two chapters of Fifty Shades of Grey – both were read with my best friend and we laughed so hard we cried.

With that being said – let’s get to the point here.

Fifty Shades of Grey is the worst thing ever.

There are so many things wrong with this “novel” that I don’t even know where to start. All I know is that this madness cannot continue. I cannot keep seeing it referred to as “saucy” and watch middle aged house wives giggle over. I simply can’t. It hurts my heart to consider myself a “writer” and watch fan fiction spend time at the top of the best seller list.

Oh, yes, kids, this “novel” started as an Edward / Bella Twilight fan fiction. Not only is this a truth proved on the internet but it’s also stated at the very beginning of the publication.

The author published and earlier serialized version of this story online with different characters as “Master of the Universe” under the pseudonym Snowqueen’s Icedragon. (From Fifty Shades of Grey)

So I don’t know if you’re familiar with how fan fiction works – so I’ll give you a basic rundown. Fan fiction is where you take the characters that another person created and write your own story based on those characters. So “Master of the Universe” was an adaptation of Bella / Edward in a different setting.

That’s what fan fiction is for. That’s why it’s been created – to allow for fans to indulge their imagination with characters they love. I don’t like fan fiction but I accept it as a creative outlet.

My problem is that what has happened here that this “author” E.L. James has taken another person’s characters, changed them, and is a best seller. Though I’m sure Stephanie Meyer is self-indulgent enough that she finds this flattering. I would be so pissed off if someone did that with my characters. I think about how I just finished my first novel – an amazing experience that I am so proud of myself for completing. If someone loved my novel enough to want to write their own version of it – okay, whatever, but what I cannot stand for – and would never stand for would be someone making money off their “edits” of my characters.

How do you even think that is okay?

Imagine it on a smaller scale – you publish a blog on a site, someone likes it, takes it, changes some words, and then says hey look everyone. Wouldn’t that piss you off? You’re damn right it would and if you say it wouldn’t you’re (expletives) lying.

This is stealing.

My next reason for why Fifty Shades of Grey is the worst thing ever?

I read a book reviewer who suggested that FSOG could be supported because it was a positive representation of a woman exploring her sexuality and that this book has “helped” a lot of married couples. Um – this is a moronic argument. Why?

Remember that the characters of Anastasia and Christian are Bella & Edward. The character of Bella has been blasted all over the place as being the poster child for a Mary-Sue character and teaching teenage girls the worst lessons possible. Did your boyfriend leave you? Try to kill yourself. Want to land a man? Do whatever he says and he will love you. Just don’t think about what you want and what you need – unless, of course, you need him above all things.

It’s awful. Bella’s boyfriend breaks up with her and what does she do? Sit around for months on end, failing to shower or make contact with the outside world. Because, yes girls, this is what you should do when your high school boyfriend breaks up with you. Don’t forget that once you step outside again, you should immediately try to kill yourself a couple of times just so you can see his face again!! (But that’s a completely different rant – sorry, back on subject here) Since the character of “Ana” is Bella, Fifty Shades of Grey is nothing more than an exploration of an adult relationship between Bella & Edward.

What does that mean?

Well… now Bella—er, Ana, must do everything that Edw—Christian says, just in a much more compromising way. It’s yet another way to show teenage girls that the only way to have and keep a guy is to please him. To do what he wants. To do whatever will make him love you. You wanna talk about a war on women? There’s your war on women.

And to all you mothers out there who will show up with your daughters if this thing gets made into a movie? SHAME ON YOU. When I was a teenager, if my mother had caught me with this kind of smut in my hands, she would have been appalled at what her child was reading. But now, mothers who are desperate to be “cool” like their children, who are more concerned about being their daughters best friends than parenting their child, are eating this s&%* up like it’s candy.

What is wrong with the world of literature when a *(#$%*( fan fiction novel is higher on the New York Times Best Seller list than Stephen King and Nicolas Sparks? (Both of whom I do not enjoy, but at least they can write true flipping fiction!) You are not a great writer EL. You are nothing more than a thief. I never thought there would come a day when I would defend Stephanie Meyer (and while that day may not be today) I will say I think it’s a travesty that you have stolen her characterizations and are now profiting off it.

STOP PRAISING THIS CRAP.

And no, before you even go there – I am not jealous. I am not envious of her (stolen) success. I am not upset that she’s all over the news and I am not.

I would rather remain a “writer” than to be an “author” who is so unoriginal they have to steal someone else’s work.

Last year, while sitting two rows behind the visitors’ dugout at Ranger’s stadium, one of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays lobbed a ball over the edge of the dugout and it sailed almost directly at me. For a split second, I thought, “Wow! Is this it? Will I get a ball? Will I go home with a coveted game ball souvenir?” No, of course not, the intended target was the adorable seven to ten year old boys behind me that were eagerly asking their dad a ton of baseball questions and soaking in the wonderment of being that close at a baseball game. Hell, I’m twenty-eight and I still get that look in my eye.

Here’s where things got crappy – and I don’t remember exactly what happened, but let’s just say that an adult who had probably had too many beers reached out and snagged that ball out of midair. Everyone in the general area was aghast (even the players had a shocked look on their face) and then something cool happened. One of the Rays players (I don’t remember who) grabbed another ball and I ducked away so they could fire it at the kid behind me. The look in his eyes became so much more amazed. It was a good feeling and, frankly, a damn classy move by the Rays.

My point? An adult did a jerk thing, the kid still got a ball, and everyone went on to enjoy the rest of the game.

Would people please calm down about last night? There are a ton of mitigating factors here and my god no one even stopped for a second to consider them. Now I may be of an unpopular opinion here but this is getting completely out of hand.

First of all, I will gladly surrender a ball to a child, though I wonder why I should have to. Still, if last night is any indication, I would be too afraid to not do so.

I appreciate my friends who have chimed in with me on this issue – considering it’s a viral sensation, I’m sure we all have a lot to say, but I want to address a couple of things and then hopefully, everyone, including me, will shut up.

1.) The kid still got a ball. In fact, he got a better one. He got one that he can make up any story in the world. Maybe all of the Rangers spit on it or maybe it was Wash or Napoli that grabbed it off the bench and told someone to toss it back. WHO KNOWS WHERE THAT BALL HAD BEEN? Hell, the word could have come from Nolan himself. And that, to me, makes that ball the kid ended up better than some foul tip that was lobbed into the stands by Mitch Moreland.

2.) I keep hearing well, if I had caught a homerun that would be different, but generally kids get the balls. Uh, why? No matter if it’s a foul tip pitched into the stands or a homer launched off the end of Kinsler’s or Hamilton’s bat, some kid is still going to cry because they didn’t get the ball. So are you saying that you would then not give up that ball? How is that any different?

3.) This kid was three years old. Kids at the age of three cry a lot. I’m not a parent so I don’t pretend to understand anything else other than what my experience with children has told me. And my experience with children has taught me that three year olds hate: fast movements, loud noises, being hungry, being thirsty, being confused, and not getting what they want. A number of those things were happening at the particular time and besides that I think that game balls should go to people who will actually remember every second of the moment where they got it. Otherwise, it’s just a ball – something that could easily be purchased at Academy.

4.) (Since the couple has spoken out) I do think that it’s a pretty damn unrealistic that these people had no idea of what was going on around them. I think that’s a little farfetched, seeing as how they were sitting right next to a screaming toddler.

5.) That being said I do think that Michael Kay owes them a big stinking apology. Like what happened or not, his comments were completely inappropriate and an obvious commentary that masked what he was really feeling – anger and frustration at the Yankee’s getting beat at the Ballpark in Arlington.

So there – that’s my take on the whole thing.

Can we move on to baseball topics now? Like how the Rangers haven’t lost a series since the season started? How about we talk about how much the Angels suck? Anything else.

Please.

For a long time, I’ve considered myself a weather buff. As a small child, I used to spend my free time watching the Weather Channel and pretending to be the meterologist when my family finally purchased our first big screen. I like to make the joke that I would have been a meterologist if I was better at math and science – but numbers are not my thing.

Over the years, I’ve taught myself how to read Doppler radar – I’ve learned how to identify stoms that might spin, just by watching the way that the move. I’ve spent many many years following weather and while my heart breaks every time a tonado hits and takes away homes, businesses, and even lives – the fact is that weather is fascinating. With the avaliability to streaming coverage now, when tornado warnings are out and about, I’m Googling for a live feed that might be hundreds of miles away.

I, like many others, followed James Spann & the crew at ABC 33/40 the entire day on April 27, 2011 as monster tornadoes struck the heart of the mid south. I have to be honest, our local ABC affiliate (Pete Delkus @ WFAA ) is great, but there is no one quite like James Spann (at least, IMO). What makes meterologists like Pete, James, and a quick shot out to my former home state and KATV’s Todd Yakoubian, so amazing? Not only do they warn – they educate. Diane failed to educate her large audience on Monday night.

I’d like to quote a line from the recent blog post on James Spann’s ABC 33/40 weather blog – “NO WARNING? Get a clue.” I say bravo to you James for calling Diane & the ABC Nightly News producers/writers who wanted to use a series of tragic events to create a sensational story and perpetuate the stereotypes that exist across the south. If you have never lived through a tornado or hidden in your tiny bathtub with two cats, some pillows, a blanket, and your laptop resting on the litter box so that you can hear when you get the all clear, then you shouldn’t get to make blanket statements about the NWS warning system.

There are no organizations that work harder than the National Weather Service & meteorologists, IMO. In the face of severe events, they are issuing Mesoscale discussions, hosting conference calls with meterologists, and doing everything in their power to make sure that the public is safe. Years ago, your average lead time to a tornado warning was approximately 5 minutes before the tornado would be in your area, and now with the new technology that the National Weather Service has researched and tested – those lead times were 20 – 30 minutes before the arrivial of Monday overnight storms. This is ample warning to take shelter and it’s an improvement leaps and bounds over the warning times that we used to have. According to the NSSL average lead times are 11 minutes.

And while Diane’s comments completely suck, they are also dangerous. If ABC Nightly News states that severe weather doesn’t happen in the “winter” months, then why would anyone be concerned as severe weather moves through. Cosidering the lack of snow cover in the United States right now, surely Diane would agree that we are in a different weather pattern (called, La Nina). Diane, however, is not the only one who is guilty of letting this kind of thinking get in the way of their saftey.

1. Some do not take warnings seriously. In the aftermath of severe weather events, I despise hearing the person who is interviewed that says Well, we just didn’t know. We didn’t have any time. In most cases this is a lie. It’s true, that severe storms can sometimes drop the random tornado that the NWS cannot accurately forecast – the reason for this is because scientists are still working on how to predict tornadoes. There is no “exact” formula that can be used to break down the construction of a thunderstorm and determine what will produce a tornado and what will not. While supercell thunderstorms are the most common producers of tornados, linear events can also produce rotation and tornaodes. When your meterologist says there is a warning in your area of forecasts days in advance that the weather might be tricky, you need to listen to them. They do not speak for the sake of hearing their own voices and many times, the meterologists in these areas are on the air for 8-10 hours straight.
2. Some would rather watch TV. There is nothing more annoying in the middle of a severe outbreak than having to read on Facebook, Twitter, and other social networks that The Bachelor or American Idol is being interrupted. The arguments sound something like this, “Well, I live in such and such place, and the weather is fine here.” How about a brief lesson in how TV markets work – the people who are in a certain area all get their news and weather alerts from a particular group of affiliates. So if I’m in Dallas, and there’s a storm in Denton, there’s some guy in Denton who needs to know where the storm is. Most TV stations have made pledges to be on the air if a tornado warning is in their viewing market – instead of being a jerk about it and calling these news stations to complain, you should be thankful for it – because the next time they need to break in, it might be for you.

Side Note: Having lived in a very small town, I was always grateful when the local affiliate would break in and tell me what was going on in Glenwood, Arkansas. In a TV market like Little Rock – the news crews stuggle, at least in my expierence, to adequately cover the small towns around them when severe weather is within the Metro of Little Rock. I can understand that, for the most part, however Arkansas meterologists can consider this an open request to do a better job of revisiting these smaller cities and the track of storms after the initial warnings are issued. (This particular issue is the reason why I became so loyal to the coverage on KATV – I felt like they were the only people who could be bothered to go back and work a number of storms around Arkansas. When your TV market is (basically) an entire state, I know it gets hard when there are multiple warnings at once, but I was always thankful for that.)

3. Tornados Can Happen Whenever. There is no “season” for tornadoes. While the conditions come together best in the Spring months, the conditions can exist at any time. Making the assumption that it’s a total surprise for tornadoes to hit in the “winter” months is completely ridiculious. (See: Super Tuesday 2008 Outbreak)
4. Some don’t know what is a safe place. The safest place is underground – but in an area like TX, it’s difficult to get homes with basements / storm shelters. In that case, your “safe place” for a tornado is the centermost / lowest level part of your home, away from doors and windows. A good rule of thumb is to put as many walls between you and the outside as possible. You should take your cell phone, flashlight, and wear tennis shoes into your safe place. For small children (and yourself, if possible) put on bicycle helmets to protect your head.
5. Remember that it doesn’t take a tornado to cause damage. Severe wind and hail events can cause damage and loss of life & property too. Straight line winds and large hail can cause damage and death.
6. Tornado sirens are not just “tornado” sirens. These devices are used to notify the public of other severe events as well. They are most associated with tornadoes, but they are actually civil defense sires. During severe weather, these sirens can also be used to warn of strong winds or large hail, and notifies people of significant weather events moving your way. Just because they go off and there is no tornado warning does not mean that there is not a weather event that you need to take cover for. Most communities also test these once a month so you might briefly hear them when the skies are blue / clear. (This is not to say there aren’t mishaps with sirens.)
7. The “it can’t happen here” mentality. A tornado doesn’t care if there has never been major damage in your city, nor does it care if you live in a mountain valley. It will hit where ever it wants to.

With Spring approaching and some forecasts showing the potential for it to be a very interesting year, I strongly suggest you take the time to buy a NOAA weather radio. These are imperative to protecting yourself and your family in the event of a severe weather event.

Educate yourself and respect the warnings, folks. They aren’t made up simply to piss you off and scare you – it’s to save your life.

Weather Resources that Might Be of Interest
Storm Prediction Center
Arkansas Weather Blog
National Weather Service
National Severe Storms Labratory
NOAA Weather Radio
Follow Your Hastag on Twitter (Ex: #txwx)

Texas Weather on Twitter

ABC WFAA
Fox
CBS
Note: While ABC has issued a correction – the damage is already done

Now, keep in mind before you follow this – because I don’t do measurements (for the most part). Spices and garlic and things like that are the things that can always be adjusted for more or less of a flavor, so I sort of operate on the “to taste” rule. But what I’ve listed below is what I use to create a flavorful sauce that we eat up.

Here is what you need:
1 & 1/2 cup of chicken broth
4 cloves of garlic (pressed) (to taste – we like a heavy garlic flavor)
1/2 package of cream cheese
1 tsp. of Dijon mustard (to taste)
Salt & Pepper (to taste)
Parsley (to taste. I used the dried stuff, but I’m sure fresh would be just as good)
UPDATE I made this again the other night and added 1 spoon full of ricotta when I added the cream cheese. Really enjoyed that.

(Saute chicken in a little bit of olive oil and put some angel hair pasta on to boil)

In a clean pan, splash in a little bit of olive oil. Let the oil get hot and add in the garlic. Since you don’t want to burn the garlic, don’t cook it too long. I always know my garlic is ready when it’s making big bubbles in the oil and the smell kind of burns your eyes like an onion.

Add in the chicken broth & let it come to a boil. You want to let it reduce about 1/3 of the original. Then add in the mustard (to taste – always taste). Mix and let it continue to reduce until it’s about 1/2 of the original addition of the chicken broth. Then add in the cream cheese.

Use a whisk and mix it up into the broth mixture. Incorporate the cream cheese into the broth mixture and let it thicken some (it’s thickening when it bubbles – but it is cheese, so keep it moving so it doesn’t burn and stick). Stir in the parsley at the end to add some color. Taste taste taste.

Serve the chicken over some of the cooked pasta and pour on the sauce.

Enjoy!

I always get asked how many costume parties I had, if it was super cool to be born on that day. The truth is… no. The only thing Halloween-y I do is wear a crown on the day, mostly because I’m quirky like that and crowns are readily avaliable. Since I’ve never really been “into” the holiday (and I’ll be 28!) here are 14 things I don’t understand about the grand traditions of Halloween.

1. Pumpkin carving. Why is this fun?
2. Haunted houses. I’ve been one me entire life and at the end I was chased by a man with a chainsaw. I ran, I fell, and I hurt myself. It was not a good time. I didn’t laugh.
3. Gore. Gore is gross. Someone walking around with fake brains hanging out of their head is not… pleasent.
4. Halloween decorations in yards – your fake spiderweb is dragging down the neighborhood. And when are you going to clean that up? I hope on the 1st.
5. Towns / Cities that “officially change” the night to a weekend end night if Halloween lands on a school night. Um? Who gave you the power to do that? Don’t you think I’d like to have my birthday on a Saturday every year?
6. The Monster Mash. Enough said.
7. Adult females who adopt the “slut” rule for Halloween. Sure, you’re a successful district attorney in a major metropolitian area, but for one night a year, you get to pull out the fishnets and drink too much.
8. Oh, Ted, you’re so funny. You have fake blood on your face and you’re walking around saying “Braaaaains”. No, Ted, you’re not funny.
9. Bobbing for apples. A traditional Halloween party game but I can’t find the fun in it. It’s like… waterboarding for fruit.
10. Why would I want pounds of candy when I could have a cake and presents?
11. People who look shocked when I say I don’t like Halloween.
12. Piggy backing on #14 here – but even worse? Children being allowed to break the slut rule. A nine year old in fishnets does not scream spooky to me, just creepy.
13. A new one, but people actually take their animals trick or treating? Now I have to make sure to have dog biscuits avaliable too.
14. Tricksters. I’m all about the harmless prank that makes people laugh but I cannot stand the feeling of fear. So when someone pops out with the knife and grabs me, you’re likely to get maced or punched in the balls. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

“Wake up, we’re being bombed. Go turn on the TV.”
“What?” It was about 8:00 (CT) in the morning and I didn’t need to be up this early.
“Go. Call me back.”

I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and wandered into the living room. Surely she was overacting and I was in no hurry to turn the TV on. I opened the front door, flopped down on the couch, and turned on the news.

My heart dropped into my feet as I stared at the Today show, listening to the voices of Katie Couric and Matt Lauer trying to make sense of something they did not completely understand. What a disaster – what a sad thing to happen. I said a prayer for all of those people, but I felt a pride in my chest to know that the NYPD and NYFD were responding. New Yorkers, I knew, were tough stuff. They’d get the people out, they’d put out the fire, and everything would be okay.

I picked up the phone to call my mother back. I was playing news reporter to her and the rest of the employees in the warehouse. It was a small plane she said, the FAA is investigating, safety officers are responding.
It only took about ten minutes for the reports of small, twin engine plane to turn into reports of a commercial airliner. I remember telling my mother and telling her, somewhat arrogantly, “Well, this is America, that kind of stuff doesn’t happen here.” But something was settled into my chest. Something like dread, fear, and disbelief all mixed together. She pulled the phone away from her ear to talk to her friend across from her and as she started to tell me that she would call me back…. It happened.
I can still close my eyes and see it as clearly as I saw it happen in front of me.

“Mom!” I screamed, jumping to my feet. “Mom, Mom, something just hit the other building.”
“What?”
“Mom… it’s… another plane. Another plane Mom.”

I wanted her to come home. I didn’t want to be alone. It was just me and the poodle, the poodle that was staying very close because she could sense my emotions. I hung onto every single word, listening intently as the news crews tried to make sense of everything and tried to hold their own emotions together.
To be perfectly honest, the news that happened following happened in a blur. The Pentagon was struck. It was like the next few hours happened on a string of phone calls. Calls to my mother, calls to my boyfriend, calls to a friend in New Jersey (and it took nearly an hour to connect) and checking in with him about a friend who worked at the Pentagon.

I have to say that my location in the world helped to provide me somewhat of a buffer zone to the attacks. Being in small town America at the time meant that it was highly unlikely that we would suffer a direct hit for any of these events, instead, the slow movements of a small town came to a screeching halt as the images on screen captivated us. Living in a major metropolitan area now, I suspect I would be much more fearful if anything like this were to ever happen again.

When the south tower collapsed, I remember sobbing into my hand. I had to call my mother and tell her what had happened.
When the north tower collapsed, I’ll never forget what I told her.
“Mom… they’re gone. They are just gone.”

Suddenly, on that day, the entire world existed in six degrees. I didn’t know anyone on the planes, in the towers, or at the Pentagon that lost their lives – but I knew people who knew people. In a strange, yet fascinating kind of way, I could suddenly draw a line from anyone in the United States and connect them directly to the terrorist attacks.

I’ve always been interested in history and I remember asking my parents for many years to tell me what they remembered about the day that JFK was shot. As we learned about things in school, I always asked my parents what it was like for them. What did they remember? And I can honestly say that I remember my parent’s experiences in history. I was suddenly aware that my children, one of these days, would ask me the same questions about 9/11.

Over the last ten years, I’ve had the thought of what I would tell my kids. Would I tell them the grittiness? Would I tell them about the fear? How would I explain to my children what a history book was telling them?

We learned that day the strength, the power, and the truly wonderful nature of the American spirit. As people fled for their lives they were met with firemen going up the stairs. As business men took to the stairs to get out of their burning office buildings, they grabbed the hands of their fellow American to lead them through the smoke and fire. As they learned what was happening in the rest of the world, a group of mere civilians tried to save the lives of others and their own.

As terrifying, sad, and devastating September 11, 2001 was to this country, we also saw acts of heroism and sacrifice. The worst day in the nation brought out the best in many people.

A few weeks back I read a blog on Brass Tack Thinking about what I wish you knew about me.  Since I already wrote my response over on the AccuConference Blog (where I am the bloginista) I decided to bring over a variation of the post over here to marandag.com.

When we’re kids, there are a lot of things we dream about being. Doctors, lawyers, firemen, you know the drill, we all think of things that we want to do.  So I thought I would take a moment and share with you the things I always wanted to be, why, and why I didn’t take that path.

Teacher — I spent the first two years in college as an education major. I wanted to teach history to middle and high school students. The reason I chose not to continue along that path is for a lot of things. I realized I didn’t like teenagers and as much as I loved studying history and learning about it – I am not of the norm. Finding a student with the passion and love that I had might be once in a life time, and it didn’t feel right to teach in the hopes of getting that student, and not feel the same passion for the others in my class.

Lawyer—When I was a kid, my brother and I would get into arguments. My dad would call family court and we would have to present our cases to the “judge”. Many times, I won, simply because of my ability to cast a reasonable doubt against my brothers accusations or be able to show his guilt beyond one. I chose not to take this path because we couldn’t afford it and because I couldn’t see myself being a defense attorney. I knew I couldn’t stand up in front of a court room and defend someone I knew was guilty. (Jose Baez I am not)

White House Press Secretary – I thought it would be fun. When I started to pay attention to politics, I was wrong.

Air Force Communications Officer – When I was in college, I actually looked into going into officer training. Why? Well, I’m an Air Force brat – my parents were both active duty (met while stationed in Denver, knew each other two weeks, and on the day my mother was “done” with him, my father said So, are you going to marry me?) and my brother is currently Chief Controller at his base. It was in my blood to love and respect the military… plus my dad’s dream is to see my brother have to salute me.

A meteorologist – This is probably the one that has stuck with me the most.  I am a weather nerd. Ever since I saw my first tornado (scary) I’ve been fascinated by how the weather works. I have spent a lot of free time teaching myself terms and movements, how to spot super cells on radars, but I have never been good at math or science – things that meteorologists have to know. But one of these days, I would love to be able to stand in front of the screen at The Weather Channel and pretend.

Museum Curator – What history buff wouldn’t love to get to be at the Smithsonian, telling people stories about where the items came from, and even getting to pick the next collection to be on display. Amazing.

With that being said – I love what I do. I get to write and I get to work with great people. I’m truly happy, but sometimes it’s fun to think about.

What did you want to be when you grew up? Why did you chose to go a different path or were you one of those rare people who knew what you wanted to be a stick to it?

I’m currently sitting in my living room in the middle of the second worst longest streak of 100+ degree days of all time. With no relief in sight, the Electronic Reliability Counsel of Texas (ERCOT) is asking Texans to conserve power. This means don’t leave you lights on if you’re not in the room, limit oven use, dishwasher use, or doing laundry in peak hours of usage. If we can’t conserve our use, ERCOT may be forced to do rolling blackouts in order keep out use down.

Another part of the request was to keep your AC set at 78 or above. Sure, it means you might be a little uncomfortable in your house, but it means the person who lives beside you is going to get to have power. I’ve complied by this – and yeah, it’s kind of miserable, but we do what we have to do.
So imagine my surprise when I see this lady on NBC DFW talking about how she’s keeping her AC set at 68 (after a big show about her turning off her lights and her little speech about not doing her laundry, etc during the day.)

View more videos at: http://www.nbcdfw.com.

Excuse me? Sixty – Eight degrees?

Lady, you are a jerk.

“We keep it 68 degrees. I know that sounds ridiculous, but we keep it – I guess some people just keep it cold and we’re one of those people.”

Ummm. Hey jerk I’m one of those people too. I would love for it to be 68 degrees in my house when it’s 110 outside. That would be a blessing. I love to be cold! There’s nothing like cuddling up with a blanket and watching TV. But it’s not. It’s 78 in my house.

How dare you just throw up the middle finger to a request that the rest of your neighbors are (hopefully) probably compiling with? Who the hell do you think you are? What’s your reasoning for this?

OH! Molly is worried that her indoor pets can’t handle the heat! “I think it would be uncomfortable hot for us.” Hey listen jerk my two cats are indoor all day long too! You know what, they are fine. They are just as spry as ever. Just make sure you keep fresh water out for them – as long as it’s not freezing in the bowls. They are animals – they are tuned to live in the wild and I promise you they can handle it.

You’re being selfish Molly. Molly the jerk who is stealing the power from the rest of us. While we are sitting in our living rooms, sweating out this heat, Molly is chillaxing in her house where it’s 68 degrees. While you’re staying up late to do your laundry because you’re trying not to use up all the power during peak times, Molly is probably pulling blankets down from the linen closet and curling up on the couch with her cats.

And when ERCOT turns off your power to keep it on at the hospital or nursing home, you can thank people like Molly who don’t seem to understand that power doesn’t just come out of nowhere.

I hope ERCOT turns her off first and turns her back on last.

Now, excuse me, I’m going to go eat some ice cream. Maybe that will cool me off.

Oh, and Lady, you are a jerk.

Mark Klaas has notoriety for a very sad reason. His daughter, Polly, was kidnapped and murdered in October of 1993, forever changing his life. Mark reacted to his grief in a positive way, by creating the foundation Klasskids and becoming a child advocate. His website is calling on the FCC to review the proposal they have had regarding Trucker TV. I urge you to go to the open statement to the FCC and send your email supporting the creation of Trucker TV. I have included my letter below:

As the daughter of a 15 year veteran long-haul truck driver, I don’t think anyone could ever understand how important this legislation is. My dad used to tell me stories all the time of conversations that truck drivers have over CB networks about Amber Alert systems. Many trucking companies also send out Amber Alert’s or missing persons reports via their sophisticated computerized dispatch systems (ex: Qualcomm).

My father, many times, would call me simply to tell me about a funny car or something interesting that he saw, because, in his words “I’m out here on the road, I do nothing but look at other vehicles all day.” This is a huge statement to reflect the power that a truck driver can have for missing children. While truck drivers have long gained the reputation of being single men, without any ties to a particular place or person, I have learned that they all have families. They have daughters, sons, brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, cousins, wives husbands, you name it.

Think of this: The distance from Columbia, South Carolina to Little Rock, Arkansas is is 732 miles, roughly a 13 hour drive. Pilot/Flying J recently merged and the two most popular truck stops in the nation now operates 14 locations along 1-20 from Columbia to Atlanta, into Alabama and Mississippi. There are 16 locations from Columbia to Knoxville, TN and across Tennessee into Little Rock. This equals 30 locations that could potentially notify a truck driver to a vehicle, description, or even lead to the individuals being spotted. Not only would this be essential in returning abducted children home safe, it could also be a huge help to law enforcement trying to track down suspected criminals.

I am sending this email to urge the Federal Communications Commission to consider the proposal from Clarity Media Systems, LLC, to provide truckers a basic service, as well as what could be a life saving measure for many missing, kidnapped, or endangered children.

Sincerely,

Maranda L. Gibson
Fort Worth, Texas

Send your own and support the creation of the network that would help to bring children home!

Perfect. If I turned my engine off at the Autozone, I would be stranded in the parking lot, so when I got to the store, I left the engine running, hopped out of the car and ran in to check and see if they would do that for me. It’s easiest to just run down the conversation that occurred after I walked in the door.

Me: Do you install batteries?
Clerk: It depends on what it is.
Me: Would you do it on a 2006 Jeep Liberty? I can’t turn my car off unless you can, so, I need to know.
Clerk: *blank stare*

Now, a simple, yes, we can take care of that for you or no, I’m sorry we can’t do that, would have been fine with me. There’s a competing store a couple of blocks away and since the word “battery” is in the name of the business, I’m sure they would be willing to do it. It was then that the man in line behind me spoke up with a simple, “I can change it for you.”
Considering it was broad daylight, at a national chain store, with lots of people in the store and out in the parking lot, I gratefully agreed. How else was I going to get home?

The man made his purchases and went outside as I bought the battery (from a different clerk). I finished up, paid, and then he came back in to get the battery. On the sleeve of his shirt was the name of a local car dealership. I stepped outside with Mr. Dealership who took off old car battery and walked it back inside, where I went to go get my $13.00 refund.

This is where things got interesting. The original clerk that blank stared me was in a conversation with another gentleman who was trying to make a return. The customer bought some wrenches in those IMPOSSIBLE to get into without MACHETE hard plastic containers, and the customer cut off the top in order to get into the items to see if they fit what he was trying to use them for. The clerk is refusing to return the item because they can’t resell them due to the way the top was cut off. Here’s the exchange (paraphrased, of course.)

Customer: *visibly upset and with a raised voice* “Okay, then I just won’t come in this store anymore.”
Clerk: “Okay, fine, well, I was going to take these back, but if you’re going to be that way…”
Customer: “What way? I’ll just take my business to a different Autozone and talk to the store manager there!”
Clerk: “I was going to return this for you.”
Customer: “And then I’ll take my business to *competing store*”

Mr. Dealership got done with my battery, waited until I got the car started, declined my offer to pay him, and I instantly got his name and the name of his supervisor at the dealership.

Why? Because two things happened today – a stranger did something very nice for a random person, and I’ll never shop at Autozone again and that is too bad for AZ because I have to buy a battery for my husband’s car tomorrow (when it rains it pours). We’ll purchasing said battery somewhere else.

As far as Mr. Dealership goes, his supervisor got a call from me today and I told his supervisor, “Company integrity is not just what you do on the lot, but off, and Mr. Dealership was representing your brand in an outstanding manner. I own a Ford and if we purchase another one, it will be from your location.”

As for AZ, they lost my business, and Mr. Customer.

All over a set of five dollar wrenches.