At first my husband rolled his eyes at the idea.  I mean, what dad really wants to go make small-talk in a school gym with a bunch of other dads wearing suits and crazy valentine’s ties?  But, the more Sophia talked about it, the more John realized that it was important to her.  So, we told her if she worked hard at school and on her homework she could go.

Well, the incentive worked because she not only suckered us for the dance, but a new dress, jewelry and the whole nine yards.  After weeks of asking if today was the big day, the Daddy Daughter Dance finally rolled around.  As the two of them were getting ready for the big night I overheard John and Sophia’s conversation.

John – “Are you excited to go to the dance tonight?”
Sophia – “Yeah”
John – “I’m really excited that I get to be your date for your first school dance.”
Sophia – “Yeah, me too.”
John – “In a few years you won’t think it’s cool to hang with your dad anymore and you’ll want to go with a boy.”
Sophia – “Dad, gross.”
John – “I’m just going to enjoy this while I still can.”

At the end of the night the two of them came home with a sugar high from the valentine’s treats and sore feet from dancing the night away.  What they also came home with were some special memories that I don’t think either of them will forget.  As Sophia headed up to bed that night, John gave her a big hug and I heard him say, “I had a really good time tonight honey.”  Sophia responded “me too dad.”

These are the special moments that warm my heart.  This weekend we’re celebrating the things we love in our show Where You Live!  Make sure to tune in as we talk with kids and families around West Michigan about the things special to them.  Watch Friday at 7pm on WXSP, Saturday at 7:30am & 7:30pm on WOTV and Saturday at 6:30pm on WOOD TV.

Our friends at Pine Rest Christian Mental Health Services have provided the list below:

Pine Rest Christian Mental Health Services
1-800-678-5500
www.pinerest.org

Family Futures
616-454-4673
www.familyfutures.net

Helen DeVos Children’s Hospital
616-391-9000
www.helendevoschildrens.org

American Psychological Association
1-800-374-2721
www.apa.org

Committee for Children
1-800-634-4449
www.cfchildren.org

KidsHealth for Parents, Children, and Teens
904-697-4100
www.kidshealth.org

Mental Health America
1-800-969-NMHA or 703-684-7722
www.mentalhealthamerica.net

Stop Bullying Now!
1-888-275-4772
www.stopbullying.gov

It is heart breaking when clients share with me how they have been intentionally tormented or hurt by their peers. It damages self esteem, affects school performance, and provides many challenges for victims of bullying throughout their lives.

As parents and concerned adults, we have the ability to equip the children in our lives with alternative ways to respond to bullying behavior. Without options, children will often shut down, feel confused, and ashamed. Sometimes bullied children practice this behavior on others as a way to defend themselves. Some children give in and become fearful and timid. Children typically will not offer information to adults regarding how they are being taunted or made fun of by their peers.

Encouraging and practicing assertive responses with your child and helping them understand the difference between being assertive and being fearful or mean back to the bully can be helpful for children. Building assertiveness helps build self confidence in the face of challenging situations.  Here are some ways that you can encourage children to practice assertiveness in their responses to being bullied or watching this type of behavior:

• Take a deep breath before responding
• Stand up tall, look the bully in the eye
• Respond directly and to the point
• Speak with a calm voice, using statements such as: “You are just trying to make me mad, so I’m going to play somewhere else.” Or “I don’t like what you are saying to (my friend)—let’s leave.” Or “This is my place in line, not yours. I’m staying here.”
• Having children practice these responses at home (in role plays with you as the parent or your encouragement for them to practice it with siblings) is a way to begin to nurture this behavior.

What have your experiences been with this issue? How are you encouraging children in your life to stand up for themselves and others?  Let’s work together to equip our children around this concern.

For more information on behavioral health issues, or to seek assistance, go to www.pinerest.org

It’s a weekend of great events  for kids-

Songs in the Night: The Story of Fanny Crosby will be presented this weekend at the Kent Theatre in Cedar Springs!  Shows are Feb. 3 at 7 p.m. and Feb. 4 at 2 and 7.

 Cornerstone University Theatre will present, “A Little Princess”, Feb. 2-4 at 7:30 p.m. and Feb. 11 and 12 at 2:30 p.m. www.cornerstoneuniversity.edu/alittleprincess

 Opera Grand Rapids Presents Mozart’s The Magic Flute-Feb. 3 and 4 staged with projections and video from the Hubble Telescope.  Shows are at DeVos Performance Hall and fit for the whole family!  www.operagr.com

 The Kalamazoo Nature Center is offering Winter Sports Demo Day on Sunday from 1-3 p.m. Families can come play in the snow and try out new ways to enjoy winter including snowshoeing, winter camping and cross country skiing.

  The CARE Ballet Company will present “Romeo and Juliet” this weekend with shows on Saturday and Sundya at St. Cecillia Music Center.  www.careballet.org