I’m writing this in that most dreaded of months, February. Really, for me, February has to be the low point of the year. The sense of a “fresh start” that fall brings has long ago worn off. School books are no longer new; workbooks are only half done. Christmas has come and gone; tax return money is not yet here. The days (here in the northeast anyways) are gray and cold, and yet longer.  Spring teases me on some days, but it doesn’t really come. I can surf for next year’s curriculum, but when I add it up, I figure out that, really, I’m not a whole lot more than halfway through this school year. The end of May is a long ways off!

Enter hands-on activities. I don’t love crafts, and cooking makes a mess, and workbooks sure are easier than display boards or mounting plays, but all of these are also some of the easiest way that I know of to beat the February dulls. And, they come in a bunch of forms. Let me envision you with some easy ways to add some zing into your February days, ending with a lead up to the one bright spot in the month: Valentine’s Day.

1. Sweeten up your days with FOOD! In Tapestry plans, we often recommend that students make salt maps. How about doing one this week, but using cookie dough instead of salt dough, icing instead of Tempera paints to indicate regions, and candies like chocolate chips and licorice to indicate mountains, rivers, or political boundaries? For Tapestry users, you’ll find a recipe and detailed instructions for such maps on your Loom. For you non-Tapestry users, I saw another great edible pick-me-up recently on Pinterest: sugar cookie solar systems! See more here: http://almostunschoolers.blogspot.com/2011/08/giant-solar-system-sugar-cookie.html
   
2. Play with DOUGH! Playdough (bought or home made) makes a great, easy, fun medium to use in switching up lesson for younger students. With it, you can model so many things! Kids can model historic scenes, fashions, hair styles, or historic buildings (like pyramids). Here’s a great idea from http://thecraftyclassroom.com/blog/2011/03/26/geology-crafts, for instance, on using playdough to model the formation of the earth, for instance:
   
3. Display it! For somewhat older kids (independent readers and writers) you can almost always liven things up by turning whatever you’re studying into a display board. These boards are dirt cheap, and challenge your student to present what he’s learning in a whole new way. These can be about inventions, events, scientific theories, literary personalities, or anything else that you are studying!
   
4. Don’t forget the ham! Most kids thrive on drama. Whether they write and act out their own skit, or work together to record a radio play with all the sound effects, or decide to do scenes from Shakespeare, almost all kids like to ham it up (for dads, neighbors, friends, or other relations) if you give them the chance. There’s fodder for the dramatic everywhere you look: stories of famous lives and events abound no matter what your curriculum. Work with your kids to dramatize what you’re learning about, using stuff you have around the house for costumes, and your own supplies for makeup! Below is an old picture from our co-op’s Year 1 production of Trojan Women.
   
5. Spring into spring! OK, so, technically, it’s not spring yet. But it can be in your home! You can sprout seeds, grow Narcissus bulbs, sprout carrots, sweet potatoes, or white potatoes, or clear the decks and get started planing seeds that will become next year’s food for your family in your outside garden. Growing things always liven up our homes, and starting a few plants going gives children a reason to get up each day and look to see how big things have gotten!

   

These are just a few ideas. Do you have more? Come share! Use the comment button above and be sure to link to your blog if there’s inspiration to be found there! And, if you Pinterest, look me up and go to my “Homeschooling” board. I am constantly surfing for more ideas to add there!

This post covers chapter 9.

Before you read the chapter:

1. Give a snap reaction to the following question: “How does God see me?” Write down your answer in as much detail as you can.
2. Give a snap reaction to the following question: “How do I see me?” Write down your answer in as much detail as you can.

During (or after) your read of the chapter:

1. Elyse claims that “…our sin doesn’t faze his love for us one bit” (142). Is this something that you instinctively believe? Or is this something that you instinctively fight? On what basis do you believe/fight it?
2. Agree or disagree: “We wont want to be like him if we believe that his love is small, stingy, censorious, severe. And we’ll never be filled with His fulness until we begin to grasp the extent of his love (Eph. 3:19)” (142). In your own words, why would this be so? Do you see this dynamic operating in your life?
3. “Every sin we commit, either by omission or commission, is a failure to love as we’ve been loved. Every transgression of the law finds its genesis in a stinginess of soul, a belief that we’ve got to protect our interests, fight for our rights, build our kingdom. These are the thoughts of orphans, not well-loved daughters and sons” (144). This one hit me right between the eyes. I realized the connection between so much of my struggle and love. To let go of my agenda and seek to mirror God’s has been one of the sweetest breakthroughs of my life! Every sin is either a failure to love God or love others. Knowing that we’re loved by God is the key to letting go of self-protective or idolatrous grasping! Can you relate?
4. “Any obedience that isn’t motivated by his great love is nothing more than penance” [emphasis hers] (148). Wow. That’s a pretty bold statement. Can you think of any Scripture that would prove Elyse wrong? If she’s right, how does this impact your life as a wife, mother, and teacher?
5. On page 151, Elyse helpfully puts feet to the general principles that she’s been articulating by framing for us a series of questions that we can be asking ourselves when we meet life’s trying situations. These questions keep before us the heart of loving God first and neighbors second. Were any of them particularly helpful to you? How?
6. On page 153, Elyse is talking about how we come gladly into a live of loving service. As homeschooling moms, we really need this ability in order to serve our families, day in and day out. When our children are surly or rude, when our husbands criticize our house keeping or our teaching, or when we feel in our own hearts that we are falling short of perfection, how do we grasp the love of God and allow it to compel us? I need to remember the love of God for me, a sinner. I need to call out for grace. I need to choose to renew my mind that I am not the center of all of this: He is! And then, loving Him for loving me, I can remember that I represent Him, and that the love of Christ compels me to represent Him as well as I can. Were any of her examples on this page helpful to you in thinking through specific scenarios that have recently unfolded in your life?

Below are links that will help you navigate the discussions easier. (You can also use the Archives section of this blog.)

Discussion #8 for this book.

Discussion #10 for this book.

This post covers chapter 9.

Pre-reading questions for you and your journal:

1. Can you write a definition of the biblical meaning of the word, “sanctification”? How about “justification”?
2. Is justification a one-time event, or an ongoing one? Can you support your answer from Scripture?

After (or during) your reading of the chapter:

1. Are you compelled by Bridges’ argument that our union by faith with Christ–which makes us justified in God’s eyes–is not a legal fiction? (see p. 94-95) In your own words, describe how union with Christ actually justifies you.
2. In your own words, what does Bridges mean by the terms “renunciation” and “reliance” on the bottom of page 97. Which is harder for you on a daily basis, and why?
3. “In our standing before God, we will never be more righteous, even in heaven, than we were the day we trusted Christ, or we are now” (98-99). Bridges demonstrates this on the basis of Scripture. Do you struggle to believe that all of your sins are forgiven–blotted out–on the basis of Christ’s work on your behalf, or do you find yourself attempting to “smuggle in” some of your own righteousness before God?
4. On page 103, Bridges asks some straightforward question that we should ponder well. These can also provide great material for asking our kids whether these are their beliefs. As homeschooling moms, one of the perils we face is that of providing poor testimonies to our kids. If we are living as if we can stand (even a little bit) on our own righteousness, it is typical that this will not go unnoticed by our children. See what they think about these questions!

Below are links that will help you navigate the discussions easier. (You can also use the Archives section of this blog.)

Discussion #8 for this book.

Discussion #10 for this book.

Before you read…

1. Which of these statements is more true for you, and why?
   1. “God is infinite.” (His transcendence, as theologians term it)
   2. “God is personally involved in every detail of my life.” (His immanence, in theological terminology)
2. When you need something seemingly trivial, like a parking space in a crowded lot at the doctor’s office, do you pray for one? Why, or why not?
3. Now, dig into your heart as far as you can: what are the down-deep reasons for your answers above? (It’s OK to ask Father to help you see them.
4. Of what everyday significance to you (not just at Christmas time, in other words) is the Incarnation?

After (or during) your reading of chapter 13:

1. “We are confident in science but not God. The issue of power–the ability to make a difference, to change something–is at the heart of asking” (113). Part of this, in my life, goes with our modern conveniences and peaceful country. I so seldom find myself overwhelmed by life–truly powerless. Part of my journey into a more prayerful life has involved learning to see just how powerless I really am. “Learned desperation is the heart of a praying life” (114). How about you?
2. “We have a primal fear of walking with God in the garden, naked, without clothing. …A praying life opens itself to an infinite, searching God” (117). Do you feel this way about prayer? Or are you more afraid that God’s not there–or won’t act on your behalf? For me, it’s the latter.
3. “‘Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven’ is actually scary” (117). If you truly mean that God’s will is your will, it means that you give up all rights to question His choices, and to center your life on your own wishes, wants, and desired. I’ve lately been on a personal journey into this realm, and it was scary at first, but has become my delight. It is truly a safe and sane thing to do to embrace what actually already is: I’m the creature, created to serve at the Creator’s pleasure. And that’s all good, because He loves me!

After (or during) your reading of chapter 14:

1. “She’s being honest with God about what is on her heart. That is the point of asking” (121). Do you struggle with honestly asking God for what you want? If so, can you get down to the really real reason why?
2. “We soon realized ‘the house burning down’ was a gift” (121). This is exactly what my father-in-law says about a literal burning of my husband’s childhood home. It’s a great story, but in the end, my in-laws started over having lost everything in a house fire (and the house was rented, so they didn’t even have insurance. Dad says it was the best thing that ever happened to him: it taught him how fleeting were the world’s “must have” possessions, and how magnanimous and able to provide God was. Have you had any “houses” burn down? Care to share the fruit of a conflagration in your life?
3. “When we stop being ourselves with God, we are no longer in real conversation with God” (122). Do you know what Miller means? Look at your most recent few days? Were there times when you simply did not ask God for things that you needed or wanted? If so, why not?
4. “If we ask nothing of God, we are left adrift in an evil world” (122). Why would this be true (think relationally, and about your power to affect your world, especially the hearts of those closest to you)?
5. “Desire and surrender are the perfect balance to praying” (123). Flesh this out for yourself. I what areas are desire and surrender out of balance. Do you desire more and surrender less, or the other way around? (Usually, we err to both of these extremes on different issues.) It’s also revealing to try to look deeper in each case and ask why we are veering!
6. “The wonder of the infinite-personal God is displayed, more than anywhere else, in the Incarnation” (124). This, as Miller points out, is where God the Infinite humbled Himself to become finite and powerless. Yes, while a person (healing, teaching, sleeping, bathing), the triune God was still actively holding the world together.
7. How is prayer a moment of incarnation? (125) When is that moment most clear to you? Why are some moments more like this than others? Does it have to do with your wishes, wants, and desires, or with your inability to make God real to yourself? Either way, the answer to your dilemma is probably–you guessed it–prayer! You can’t walk with God all on your own efforts!
8. “What do I lose when I have a praying life? Control. Independence. What do I gain? Friendship with God. A quiet heart. The living work of God in the hearts of those I love. The ability to roll back the tide of evil. I lose my kingdom and I get his. I move from being an independent player to a dependent lover. I move from being an orphan to a child of God” (125-126). This is a quotation worth recording into your journal and revisiting time and again. The Devil would love for you to lose sight of this truckload of truth!
9. Suffering is God’s gift to make us aware of our contingent existence. It creates an environment where we see the true nature of our existence–dependent on the living God” (126). This touches on the reality expressed in the quotation on #4 above, and it also informs the first sentences of the quotation of #8. We are deluded into thinking that we ever have control or independence. We were created to be dependent before the Fall: we were always the weak and powerless creatures that we are today (compared to the cosmos). The combination of sinful natures introduced at the Fall combined with attitudes from the Enlightenment and the can-do culture of America have combined to make our natural state of dependence (and the blessings thereof) hard for us to see. But, we are dependent; suffering wakes us up to the fact before it’s too late to turn from independence and thus die in our sins. Suffering is therefore a supreme gift. Anyone else know what I mean? Care to share? Hit the “comment” link above!

Below are links that will help you navigate the discussions easier. (You can also use the Archives section of this blog.)

Discussion #8 for this book.

Discussion #10 for this book.

This post covers chapter 8.

Pre-reading questions for you and your journal:

1. Do you have a pattern of sin in your life that really disheartens you, and you can’t stop, and you don’t know why you even do it? If so, write down the particulars (it’s best to use a small, recent instance of it so you can really get your hands around it) in your journal before reading:
   • What was going on in your life when it happened (sleep, cycle, health, time of day, etc.)?
   • How did your reaction/response help/hurt the situation?
2. Think now about this question, and try to answer it with brutal honesty, using biblical terms: What did you want in the situation? Or, what weren’t you getting that you wanted? (Many times, when we have patterns of sin in our lives that seem unconquerable, it’s because we want something (even a good thing) too much. We are willing to sin to get it, or to try to control/manipulate others so that they don’t prevent us from getting it. Can you apply these insights to your situation? (Hint: Ask Father to help!)

After (or during) your reading:

1. Elyse quotes Romans 6:11, which gives that letter’s first gospel imperative: “You must also consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus.” Synonyms for “consider” are “judge” and “reckon.” Given the evidence of our senses, it can be hard for us to see ourselves as God sees us: alive to Him in Christ. What does that even mean to you, today? Try to put it into your own words, and if you would like to share with us all, hit the “comment” link above!
2. In this chapter, Elyse is working to help us understand how to “put off” sin that so easily entangles us. There are two kinds of gospel imperatives: “put off” and “put on.” We are here considering what we should “put off.” The Bible gives us clear language that calls a sin a sin. We are not usually “frustrated.” We are angry, impatient, or judgmental. If we don’t learn to call sins by their Bible names, then we shortchange the amount of real help that the Bible can give us! What are some of the sins (even just one at a time) that God is bringing to your attention lately? Keep it in mind as you read, and see to apply the truths that Elyse is telling you as general principles and approaches.
3. In my experience, so much of my sin felt like it was caused by the actions and attitudes of others. For instance, when someone recently took pains to pridefully show me how much better than me she was at tending houseplants, I felt angry and judgmental in response. If she had not displayed criticism and pride in my presence, I never would have had those responses, right? Wrong! Those sinful attitudes of anger and judgmentalism live in my heart constantly. It’s like if you had a cup of water and you knocked it suddenly, such that it spilled. What would spill? Grape juice? Wine? No! Water, silly. Of course. Because that’s what’s in the cup. When this person provoked me, it revealed what was already resident in my heart that needed to be exposed. Why? So that *I* could see it and so that God could help me to be cleansed!
4. In the little vignette that I outlined above, it was easy to feel self-righteously right about my thoughts towards my sister. But I knew that my critical thoughts of her and my overall attitude towards her were not right. I wanted better treatment. I wanted her to be kind. I wanted to be above reproach. I wanted many things. What did God want? Elyse so rightly points out “…we have to get our eyes off our sin and back onto his accomplished work on the cross” (126) before we can address our sinful reactions and responses to provoking situations. It starts with owning the sin before God, but then, we have to turn to the only One who can cleanse us!
5. Let’s get down to the roots. Elyse makes this statement at the top of page 128: “There is one sin that is at the root of all sin: unbelief.” Look up to your pre-reading exercises to see the sin pattern that you identified as something that disheartens you because you keep doing it, seemingly against your very will. Is unbelief a part of this pattern? Are you battling it alone, without grasping hold of the Bible truths that you are a new creature, welcomed and loved by an all-powerful Father, and utterly saved from damnation by a sublime Savior, Whose life you are now free to claim as your own? Take awhile and soak in these gospel declarations. See if the root of your sin is not unbelief in the fact that God is Who He says He is, and thus you are who He says you are!
6. Next big idea: “Unbelief, the primary sin, always breeds idolatry, because we have been created to worship” (129). This is the essence of wanting things too much. When we want a good thing, we don’t sin. We want children who do their lessons cheerfully and well. Fine. But if they don’t, and we respond with sinful thoughts, words, and actions, then we want this too much. God is ruling and reigning over our lives. Things don’t go our way. Our cups are bumped, and what’s in them spills out onto the carpet for us to see. If it’s slimy, we also corrupt the lives of those around us. Ick! It all stems from idolatry: we want what we want when we want it. In the moment that our agenda becomes primary, we remove God from the throne and worship our idol: our own wills for our lives. Can you recast your sin in these terms? What does this reveal to you that’s new?
7. Here’s a real key to turn that lock of discouragement in your battle outlined above: “If we treasure, value, and love anything more than his kingdom and his righteousness, we’ll be forced into slavish fear and beset with worry” (131). Do you struggle with a besetting sin? Follow theses steps (which Elyse also lists and amplifies on pages 136-137):
   • Soak in Scriptures that tell you the gospel story, until you believe wholeheartedly that you are loved by God, and forgiven.
   • Recognize and affirm that you are the creature, not the Creator. You were created to be dependent on God, and serve Him (and others in His name). This is the only right way to relate to Father: He is the wise boss of all His creatures.
   • Pray and ask God to forgive you specifically of the sin (and the underlying idolatry) that you have identified, owning it wholeheartedly (as does David in Psalm 51) and standing only on Father’s love for you demonstrated by Jesus’ death on the cross.
   • Meditate on these words, “Thy Kingdom come! Thy will be done! On earth as it is in Heaven.” Ask God to make it true for you that His will would be done in your heart as it is in Heaven!
   • Release what you want to the Sovereign God Who loves you most and is wise beyond all knowing. Ask Him for it humbly, and then affirm that He is wiser than you are, as did Jesus: “My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will” (Matthew 26:39).
8. Fellow pilgrim: life is short, death is sure, and eternity is long! We are on our way home as we travel through a sin-sick, broken world. We gain so much by recognizing the pulls of the world, the flesh, and the devil. May I encourage you to camp out in this chapter using specific sin patterns in your life? The point is to bring them into the light and apply God’s help to defeating them. He has paid the ultimate price and given you His Spirit for just this purpose! Please take the time daily to press into these things and make Him the rightful and true King of your heart!

Below are links that will help you navigate the discussions easier. (You can also use the Archives section of this blog.)

Discussion #7 for this book.

Discussion #9 for this book.

In my Foundations Series of the Tapestry Teacher Training webinars, I was sharing tips on teaching Grammar and Dialectic students (session #4), and launched into a full-blown explanation of Training in Liberty, which my son David then humorously illustrated. I embed the video here, and then I’ll add some application comments.

Tapestry of Grace | Training in Liberty from Tapestry of Grace on Vimeo.

The video, as I now re-watch it out of it’s context within the larger TTT session, seems to lack enough detail on how to apply the Training in Liberty principle, so let me flesh that out briefly. (If you have examples as to how you use this principle, please add to this post via the “comment” button above!)

• You can use Training in Liberty to help your kids learn to responsibly keep toys and other belongings in order.
  • Let’s say that their trouble is simply that there are too many toys for them to keep neat because storage is lacking. Well, that’s really your issue: you need to establish a place for everything, and everything in its place.
  • But, now let’s say that there are good places on a shelf for ten toys, but your child owns twenty. What you do according to this principle is this: you get a big box, label it “Junior’s Toys,” and with his participation you have him choose the five toys that he’ll keep out on his shelf this month. He puts the remaining fifteen toys in the box.
  • You keep track of how he keeps those five toys. You faithfully teach, correct, and train him to keep the five toys in good order. If he does well, great. If he does poorly, warn him that he’s got too much liberty, and he’ll have fewer toys to keep track of at the end of the month.
  • At the end of a month’s time, retrieve the box with his toys in it. If he’s done well, allow him to exchange any five toys out and choose two more toys to take charge of (and play with). If he’s done poorly, reduce the number of toys that he’ll have access to, but allow him to change out and keep out any three toys.
  • In all this you must remain kind, gentle, and encouraging. You are not punishing him for a lack of skill. You are training him by giving him only as much liberty as he can handle. This is very key to this principle: it is not punitive! You should always posture yourself as being in his corner, ready to help, and eager to give him ever more liberty!
• Now, let’s expand on the above. You can easily see how to use the same process on…
  • Time spent with friends (or, actually, doing any desired activity, like playing video games or attending sports events) while balancing other responsibilities, like chores and schoolwork. Limit the enjoyable activities according to the way your child handles responsibilities.
  • Kinds of friends teens hang with. If their liberty (choosing their own friends) begins to adversely effect them, then you (the parent) can apologize for giving the too much liberty, and (hopefully with their agreement) scale back the time that they are spending with poorly chosen friends. This idea applies to choosing music, clothing, or TV programs–if they aren’t going to choose well and wisely for themselves, they’ve got too much liberty to handle it well and we, as responsible parents, must scale it back (gently, in the fear of God, and hopefully with the child’s full understanding of this principle and agreement).
  • Car or other privileges: driving, visiting friends, babysitting, any kind of job during high school–all these can be governed by the same set of ideas: we don’t want to give our kids more than they can responsibly manage! The things that they must do come first; the things that they wish to do are privileges given to responsible young people.

In all of this, remember: the beauty is that you get to sit far more often in their cheering section than in their critics’ corner! You must and should verbally express time and again how eager you are for them to demonstrate competence in an area so that you can responsibly trust them with more liberty in that area! They need to know that you are for them! Tell them so; and demonstrate it by celebrations of key milestones along the way!

Another key element to know: we found that there are times when taking away liberties will initially bring anger and/or resentment. That’s OK. You stand before God as the gatekeeper of your child’s soul; you’ll need to take some heat sometimes. They are fighting ultimately with God as long as you’re truly acting on God’s behalf. You might need to remind them of that sometime. If your child is older and you’re just learning about training in liberty for the first time GO SLOW. You don’t just want to jerk away liberties. Choose your battles well! Finally, it may surprise you to find that, many times (especially with children who have been doing this awhile and/or are still young) you will find that narrowing down liberties is actually a relief to your overburdened child! What a joy it is when that is the reaction!

Parenting in the fear of God involves training our children to responsibly handle both their responsibilities and their leisure time. Keeping those in balance in our modern society is a learned skill that takes years to master. I hope that this one principle will aid you in your quest to do the very best job that an imperfect sinner can do of helping your child to grow in both liberty and responsibility! Remember, though, that without God’s help, no parenting principles are worth much. Please do as Father to help you to see how you can use this tool in joyful submission to and dependence on Him.

In 2005, Lora posted this question on our forums:

Hi,
I wanted to know what Marcia’s thoughts (and anyone else who wants to chime in) are on studying the Great Books. I have signed my 14 year old daughter up to take a Great Books course with XXX online tutorial this fall and wanted to correlate it with Tapestry of Grace. Now I am having second thoughts about having her even read the Great Books.

I have read in the book Teaching the Trivium by the Bluedorns that reading the Great Books is not highly recommended because there are so many obscenities in them and that it is better to focus our time reading edifying literature and especially the Bible. Then I read an article in the Veritas Press catalog about the reason they use the Great Books. They said they use them as a sort of boot camp to train children to be able to see evil in comparison to biblical truth and be discerning Christians. Also, that if you shelter young adults from the evil things of this world they will be naive when it comes to temptations, etc. Another opinion from a respected source is that if we shelter our children from the truth then we have failed in teaching them to be “wise as serpents,” and that we may comfort ourselves in assuming that we have kept our children innocent only to find out that they are completely vulnerable to the enemy, naively innocent, and lacking in discernment.

So…I just don’t know what to do now. I noticed there are not many classics listed as readings in Tapestry, especially in comparison to the XXX Great Books list. Should I let her take this course or is it not wise to have her reading these books even with christian guidance and discussion?

What is your opinion Marcia and others?

Blessings to all,
Lora D

As you’ll see in my response, reprinted below, this is a perennial question that has recently reemerged on our Forum. I thought that bringing back my answer (which I still like, amazingly) might help some of you who are encountering some of the harder truths of the story of mankind in this, the doldrums of winter.  Here’s what I wrote back to Lora in 2005, and it still holds true today!

Lora,

This is a question that I’ve heard discussed in various forms, and with relation to various educational paradigms, since I started homeschooling. You have summarized well the underlying quandary: should parents raise children who are innocent of the knowledge of evil, or children who understand evil, and seek to keep themselves from it?

Said another way, one view is that we should view our children as young plants in a greenhouse, who cannot withstand the cruel weather of winter, and must be protected, artificially even, from harm or blight. We should, therefore, shield our children from the knowledge of evil. Our goal is to engender in them such a love of what is good by constant communion with it that they are rightly horrified by evil when they do encounter it, and will most likely flee from it when they encounter it, as in 2 Tim. 2:22 (ESV) “So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.” Another verse that might describe their hearts would be Paul’s sentiment expressed in 2 Cor. 11:2-3 (ESV) “I feel a divine jealousy for you, for I betrothed you to one husband, to present you as a pure virgin to Christ. But I am afraid that as the serpent deceived Eve by his cunning, your thoughts will be led astray from a sincere and pure devotion to Christ.”

The other view, as you’ve said, argues that children will need to become acquainted with the evils of the world at a more tender age than we could wish so that they will have more options as adults than just flight. This view says that evil is resident in all human hearts, and our children will have to deal with it all their lives, beginning with their hearts, encountering the sinful hearts of family members, and finally dealing wisely, bravely, and biblically with extreme evil in the world. Because of this reality, we should seek an education that acquaints our children with evil as an abhorrence to God, defining it in as many ways as possible for our children, but certainly without asking them to experience its force too soon. Parents on this end of the spectrum would point to Romans 12:9 (ESV) “Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good,” and Acts 17:11 (ESV) “Now these Jews were more noble than those in Thessalonica; they received the word with all eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so,” or Matthew 10:16 (ESV) “Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves,” or finally, Psalm 127:5 (ESV)

Blessed is the man
who fills his quiver with them!
He shall not be put to shame
when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

Perhaps the crux of the matter is best seen by dividing the term “evil” into “knowledge of evil” and “experience of evil.” Neither of these two camps would espouse purposefully exposing children to active evil in the hopes of teaching them to deal with it. (To be sure, there are proponents of this idea, but I’m saying that neither of the views I’m outlining above would suggest this course.)

The question lies more in when, and how, to introduce children to the *knowledge* of evil. Do we seek to strongly establish their faith by shielding them from all possible knowledge of evil (or opposing/tempting) views or practices? Or do we carefully teach our children, through literature, history, philosophy, and the arts that mankind is evil, and that all evil is abhorrent to God, and must be to the true Christian as well? Do we primarily teach them to run from all evil, or to understand it so well that they have an answer to it, and a fearlessness of it, because evil neither surprises nor entices them, since they have met it, understood it from a biblical perspective, and rejected it before meeting it in experiential ways in the world?

I do not pretend to have the answer to this age-old quandary, but I can share how we have chosen to walk with our children, and which of these views underlies our choices for the TOG reading list.

We have taken the second view. We believe that the gospel, the Spirit, and the Word combined are active and protective in the lives of our children. We seek to acquaint our children with the evils that men do at appropriate, yet young, stages of their lives, in the hopes that they will both understand the evil and (as David did with Goliath — 1 Sam. 17:48) run to meet and defeat it, secure in their certain knowledge of God’s superior power over evil, and with strong faith in His sovereignty and love for them.

The TOG book list reflects our views. It is not truly a Great Books curriculum, yet it contains many books on that list. We have attempted to carefully mine the works of Western Civilization for representations of TRUTH — good and bad — that will aid us in teaching our children about God, mankind, and the culture which we hope they will affect for good. Some of our choices involve “tough” subjects: Les Miserables and Crime and Punishment have sympathetic characters who sin grievously (prostitution and murder); such books as One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich and All Quiet on the Western Front detail the brutality of man against man; 1984 and Farenheit 451 give compelling examples of mankind’s hopeless state apart from God, and are bleak and depressing. However, there is real TRUTH in all these works. They do not paint good as evil, and evil as good. Often, they are the voices of a perplexed humanity adding to the Great Conversation their pain, but also their lack of understanding. They don’t know about the nature of the fallen world (and the fallen nature) in which they find themselves. They portray for us their view of the human condition, and we at Tapestry, through our helps, seek to help you to bring a biblical perspective to these voices and the views they espouse so that your children may be equipped to encounter similar situations with Christian charity, biblical hope, and compassionate, informed evangelism. We also make sure to offer a much lighter treatment of “heavy” subjects, especially in Year 4, in the lower levels. There, our focus is on the advances of mankind during those troubled years: the space race, radio plays, and inventions are key foci.

Sorry this got a bit long. I’ll hop down off my soap box now, but you’ve hit on one of my favorite topics. Let me just say, in closing, that my children now range from 14 to 24. They all have (by God’s grace alone) a vibrant, unshrinking faith in God and confidence in His ability to guide, protect, and love them, come what may. The fruit of this alternative has been sweet. However, I am sure that others who have chosen the other path in FAITH have experienced sweet fruit as well. Whenever we seek to honor God, we win, because in the end, He empowers those who wholly trust in Him. It’s never our feeble efforts, or wise theories, that raise God-filled children: God Himself fills them as He wills with His Spirit, and we do well to seek Him daily for *that* provision, and rest in Him which ever path we choose.

Update for 1/12: The last paragraph above, by God’s grace alone, is as true today as it was when I penned it almost seven years ago. My kids are now 21-31 years of age; four of them are married, all but one have graduated college unscathed by the worldliness they encountered there, and my “baby” Marjorie will graduate in May, God willing. We have 3 going on 5 grandchildren, and it is pure joy to see strong, vibrant faith in Jesus Christ going forward to the next generation. This is not of us, or solely because of our choices. It is all of grace. But, God works through our choices. They were the right ones for our family, and I feel that our experience must stand as some kind of an answer to the fears of many parents who look at the problems surrounding the introduction of evil to the hearts of our young children. May God lead you to the right answers for your children. Be assured that God loves you and them everlastingly, and will lead you on the right path as you look to Him!

This post covers chapter 8.

1. How does full reconciliation after conflicts differ from “surface peace”?
2. What must be done before full reconciliation occurs?

After you read the chapter:

1. From Scripture, Jerry asserts that God actually hates those who do wrong (85). Perhaps you’ve been a Christian a long time. Does it take you aback to think that, apart from Jesus’ rescue of your soul, God would hate you?
2. How did this sentence strike you: “Even though He is the One offended by our sin, He is the One who makes amends to Himself through the death of Christ” (85)? Read and meditate on Romans 5:10.
3. Were you touched to read that, after making restitution for us, God implores us to be reconciled to Him, even though He is the offended party? And, because we are so weak, He sent us His Spirit to help us even understand (and then receive) this good news according to God’s choice? What amazing riches we really do have in Christ! What amazing grace!
4. Of the list that Jerry gives us on page 88, which is most freshly amazing to you, and why?

Below are links that will help you navigate the discussions easier. (You can also use the Archives section of this blog.)

Discussion #7 for this book.

Discussion #9 for this book.

This post covers chapter 12.

I believe that this is one of the most pivotal chapters in this book, so we’re going to take a whole session on it! Below are some questions to ponder and answer before you read the chapter.

1. What is your greatest mental barrier to simply asking God for what you want?
2. Is prayer feeling or fact?

After (or during) your reading of this chapter:

1. How do you tend to approach the world: through a knowledge of facts or through your intuitions/feelings (or possibly both–but in what proportion)?
2. Does the idea that “feelings are true only for me but facts are true for everyone” (page 104) resonate with you?  Do you buy the idea that you can feel that pornography is harmful, but that your neighbor can feel with equal force that he is not harmed by it, so it’s OK for him?
3. Do feelings = values? If you think so, where does it say so in God’s Word?
4. Note well what Miller is saying here: putting religion (and prayer) into the “feelings” category makes the claims of Christianity no longer universally true for all people. And if that is so, then God does not have a claim on people’s lives. What is the real truth about where the claims that God has on our lives come from?
5. Here is a staggeringly important quotation, which sums up our message in Tapestry studies of Year 2, Unit 2, and following: “Secularism is a religious belief that grew out of the pride of human achievement, particularly scientific achievement. It masquerades as science or reality, [as] opposed to religion, which it calls opinion” (106). Think about your life over the last week? Were there situations where you never even thought of asking Father for help because, of course, the facts were… (you fill in the blank)… and religion just doesn’t touch on those facts? I did! The modern mindset permeates our worldview: we can guard against it but it’s almost always lurking!
6. “Secularism doesn’t say that religion is not real. It defines it as not real. Once you’ve defined it as not real, then it isn’t even an item for discussion” (108). Wow. So true of the modern worldview. Do you feel hampered in your ability to share the gospel with the stranger sitting with you in the waiting room because, well, religion is personal, not real? In a hundred ways a day, God’s glory is obscured by this mindset. Take some time. Ponder. Where in your life does the secular definition of Christian truths mean that God is not honored as He deserves to be?
7. Did the “by the way…” information that ends this chapter cause you to tear up? It does me. I am like that when I see God being exalted to a position that He should have held all along. There’s a deep sense of justice that comes with seeing the lies that so easily entangle our souls. What did you glean from this chapter? Care to share with us other children?

Below are links that will help you navigate the discussions easier. (You can also use the Archives section of this blog.)

Discussion #7 for this book.

Discussion #9 for this book.

This post covers chapter 7.

Pre-reading exercises for your journal:

1. Where do you typically find motivation to obey the commands of God?
2. Quickly and without thinking, write down your response to this question: “Homeschooling: most days, is it burden or blessing?”

After (or during) your reading of the chapter:

1. Read this passage on page 109 carefully:”…please remember that your growth in holiness is firmly bound to your appreciation of the gospel and God’s love, for it is only an appreciation of his love that can motivate genuine obedience. Outward obedience can be and frequently is generated by other motives, such as the fear of failure or desire for approval, in pride, despair, or self-indulgence and, because it is done out of a love for self, more sin.”How well has Elyse described the root of your struggles as a homeschooling parent? Recently, I have been growing in an appreciation of God’s love for me, and His work on the cross, and I can testify to the truth of Elyse’s statement here. I feel like I have never really obeyed God with any wholesome motive until now–as I begin to soak in the love of God through Christ. Anyone else share my experience? Hit the “comment” link above and share!If this is not yet your focus–the love of God in Christ–may I recommend Elyse’s other book, Counsel from the Cross? It has helped me to begin to comprehend the importance of beginning to know God’s love for me–a quest that will engage me for the rest of my life! I also recommend for growth in this area another of our book club selections: Jerry Bridges’ The Gospel for Real Life.
2. On page 112, Elyse uses different terms than “indicative” and “imperative.” She uses for the self-same ideas the terms “gospel declarations” (about who we are in Christ and what God has done for us and thinks about us) and then “gospel obligations” (where Bible writers tell us that because of the gospel declarations we can and should walk differently than people who are not the King’s children). Which of Elyse’s terms for this profound truth (that we need to grasp assurances before we attempt obedience) do you find easier to grasp, and why?
3. “I’ve spent a great deal of time reminding you of what God in his love has already accomplished in you. I’ve purposely done this because I think that’s where most serious Christians fail; and because they fail to hold close these marvelous truths, their obedience becomes a burdensome exercise in self-improvement” (111). Does this observation resonate with you? In what areas is your obedience burdensome? In what areas are you motivated by something other than the love of God for you in Christ?
4. How real is this truth to you: “Our obedience is entirely the result of the seed he has planted in us and the work of the Spirit through us” (112)? How can you make it more real to yourself?
5. Do you fall into either the Happy Moralist or the Sad Moralist camps? How would you begin to correct your error if you do? (Hint: it’s on page 114, and most of us have been in both of these camps by turns!)
6. Have you been able to apply the truths of this chapter to your homeschooling work? Elyse has said a lot about tying the work of today to the work already accomplished in us in Christ. She also reminds us that it is God who works in us as we work (Phil. 2:12-13, Eph. 2:10, 1 Cor. 15:10). How can you make this real to yourself as you wade into each homeschooling day? Would posting some of these Scriptures on your refrigerator or bathroom mirror help?
7. Elyse dwells on the fact that the gospel seed planted in your heart (justification) will certainly, by God’s grace, blossom into practices that glorify God (sanctification). A little known fact about homeschooling is that, while we struggle to shape our kids’ hearts and minds through homeschooling, God is shaping our hearts and minds at the same time. As we cling to Him and look to Him for grace to persevere, to work, and to love our children aright, we do change. God is at work in your setting: He chose it for you, specifically. It cannot fail to produce good fruit! Look back–how can you see ways that homeschooling has made you more like Jesus? Write these down, and plan to make this kind of assessment at least twice a year in the future!

Below are links that will help you navigate the discussions easier. (You can also use the Archives section of this blog.)

Discussion #6 for this book.

Discussion #8 for this book.