During the summer, I am often trying to find fun low-cost activities to keep my kids busy and have fun as a family. This summer, I found out about an amazing offer to military families. An organization called Blue Star Families has an initiative with the National Endowment for the Arts that provides free admission to hundreds of museums all over the United States. I learned that this offer is open every summer from Memorial Day through Labor Day and that in addition, many museums continue to welcome military families at no cost throughout the entire year.

There is an easy to browse through list of participating museums at www.bluestarfam.org Museums that are part of the program simply require you to show a military ID and you get admission for the service person as well as all dependents. We live near Chicago and my family took advantage of admission to the Morton Arboretum, the Dupage Children’s Museum and the Chicago Children’s Museum. I was amazed at the generosity of the participating museums and we look forward to utilizing the program next summer as well!

In addition to the Blue Star Museums initiative, the Blue Star Family organization provides numerous resources for Military families. According to the website, the mission of the organization is to “Support, Connect and Empower Military Families.” The website truly should be utilized by all military families. There is an extensive list of helpful links and resources with all things related to the military. There is an outstanding list of national U.S. Companies that provide deals and discounts to military families. Another useful link on the website is a list of college scholarship opportunities available to members of the military as well as spouses and dependents.

In addition to the helpful resources, Blue Star families have several other amazing programs. Books on base is another recent Blue Star initiative that sounds fantastic. Through sponsors and donors, the organization is providing books and reading material to military children living on post, or attending schools that have a lot of military families. Individual families can request that their child be a recipient by going to Blue Star website. There is also a program called “Operation Appreciation” where letters can be sent to show appreciation to military members as well as families.

If you are a military spouse, you should definitely check out www.bluestarfam.org for resources and to start taking advantage of the excellent programs in place to support military families!

It is known that dealing with a deployment can be an huge source of stress on families. It is also commonly known that exercise is a fantastic way to reduce stress. So, it makes sense that going to the gym while your loved one is deployed can be not only be great for your body but it is a fantastic way to feel better about yourself and improve your mental health.

If you live near a military post, you can take advantage of the MWR (morale, welfare and recreation center). But if you are a National Guard or Reserve family, you may not have that option. But thankfully, the Department of Defense and the YMCA have partnered together in the YMCA Military Outreach program. YMCA’s throughout the United States and Puerto Rico are offering free memberships to National Guard and Reserve families while their sponsor is deployed. In addition, they offer free memberships to active duty families that relocate away from a military post during the deployment. In order to take advantage of this program, you simply show a military ID, a copy of deployment orders and bring the following form to your local YMCA: http://www.militaryonesource.com/Portals/0/Content/Forms/YMCAeligibilityform.doc.

With a free membership you can use all of the fitness facilities including the pool. Many facilities also offer rock climbing walls, outdoor field use and fantastic members only events. In addition, you receive the reduced member rate on all class and activity enrollment fees for yourself and your children. Another great feature of the YMCA is that they offer free childcare for up to two hours while parents work out.

During my husband’s most recent deployment I took full advantage of the YMCA program with my children. It truly made all of us happier to go to the Y a few times a week. I was able to take a break and do something good for myself by working out and my kids had a blast playing in the Kidzone. We all loved playing in the pool together and my kids were able to take swim lessons and join sports leagues. I truly believe that the distraction of having fun together helped all of us cope with my husband being gone. The YMCA Military Outreach program is outstanding and something that military families should take advantage of!

What do other army wives suggest during a deployment, staying or moving back home? I am weighing my options right now and I would like to know the pro’s and con’s.I have to seriously consider it because I was offered a job where I am from. Also,my parents offered to let me live rent free for the year to save money. Is it really worth the hassle?

Also I would be storing my belongings at our current duty station and just bringing back the necessary things so I wouldn’t have to move a whole house hold of goods.

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I think it depends a lot on the situation at hand though I must say I’ve only heard horror stories about moving back home during the deployment. Though that could just be because those with great stories aren’t as apt to share them with everyone.

One, even though it would be rent free, I think it’s worth considering moving back home to be around family but maybe not necessarily moving back IN with family. I think it can be very difficult for any parent to see their child as an adult when living with them and truly not play the parent-child role. Of course, you know your specific situation better than anyone else and whether there’s a risk of falling back into this role.

Two, I personally always stayed at his duty station when he was deployed (four times). I felt I had more access to information and support from people who had been there, done that by staying where I was. I did visit my parents more often when he was deployed (they were only a few hours away) but was glad I still had MY home to return to after the visit. The people in my hometown simply didn’t understand the whole Army process with deployments, etc and it gets old when everyone you see has this look of pity on their face with a sappy “how are you doing?”. You don’t endure that as much in a military town. The support is there but the pity is not as much – I think mainly because you’re around others who have been through it and have a better understanding of what to say or not to say.

If you have kids, I would think long and hard about making another big change in their lives with switching schools, leaving their friends, familiar surroundings, etc. The teachers in a military town also seem to be more equipped to handle the challenges of deployments with kids simply because they’ve been exposed to it more.

Ultimately, it’s up to you. And now, I’ll open it up to opinions from others as this is based solely on me and the few friends I know who have moved back. Good luck!

One of the major benefits of joining the military as an active duty soldier is the family medical coverage through Tricare and access to zero cost prescriptions at any Military Treatment Facility (MTF).  In addition, any time a National Guard or Reserve soldier is on orders for thirty days or more, he or she is also eligible for these benefits.

Great Resource for National Guard Families

As an Army National Guard wife of ten years, my husband has spent almost a third of his time on active duty status due to deployments, schools and time spent in recruiting.  But in all the time he’s been on active duty, we have not lived anywhere near an Army post and therefore have not had access to a Military Treatment Facility.  Tricare members may use a traditional drugstore pharmacy to fill prescriptions but depending on the types of prescriptions a family needs, the prices can really add up.  Over time, I’ve heard the common complaint of military families saying that prescriptions cost way too much if you are not able to fill them on post.

What is Express Scripts?

A great way to save money on prescriptions if you are covered through Tricare but do not live near a MTF is to use Tricare’s mail order pharmacy: Express Scripts.   Basically, it costs 1/3 of the price to get prescriptions filled. You can order a 90 day supply of a prescription for the same cost as you would pay for a 30 day supply at a drugstore pharmacy.   Even more exciting news is that as of October 1, Express Scripts is offering generics at no cost!

How Do I Sign Up?

Using Express Scripts is very easy to do.  Simply go to www.express-scripts.com to set up a family account.  Once an account is set up all you have to do is print a form and take it with you to the doctor.  The doctor can fill out the prescription section and fax it directly to Express Scripts to fill your order.  If you go to an appointment without the pre-printed form, you can also send a traditional doctor prescription note to Express Scripts in the mail. The company works very quickly to get orders sent out in just a few days.  Another benefit is that you will get email reminders sent to you when it is time to refill a prescription every 90 days.

My family has used the mail order pharmacy program whenever my husband has been on active duty orders.  We have saved a lot of money over the years by using this service.  The only downside is that you have to wait a few days to get your order in the mail so it is not always convenient when someone is sick and needs their medication right away.  But, for anything that is taken on a regular basis I would absolutely recommend Express Scripts!

Since starting Married to the Army in 2004, I think I’ve been through five site redesigns. FIVE! The first three of those had all hand-coded pages and I thought I was going to lose my mind. Now that I’m using WordPress, changing the design isn’t near as difficult.

No worries though – it is far from done! There is much more to come and MANY new articles headed your way. How exciting is that?!

I am SUPER excited to have Andrea, a National Guard wife, writing for me as well too. This will help to round out the site. I hope to add more writers in the future. So keep checking back with us and be sure to join us on Facebook where we have a pretty active community.

And of course, let me know what you think about the new design!

My daughter is 18 years old and was talked into marriage by a guy serving in the army. He was in Afghanistan. She stayed by the computer everyday just to speak with him. He is getting back to Tenn. January 4, 2011 and yesterday morn. calls her to say he doesn’t want her to come down to be with him because she is only 18 and he will be going out to bars that she cant get into. Now he says he wants a divorce after one month. She has a medical condition she has had for years and we dropped her from our ins. when they got married. He has not supported her at all and he says she can get nothing. What are we supposed to do? Turns out this is his second marriage and hes only 23. He even talked her into tattooing his name on her. I just feel like he really messed her life up. I’m not saying she shouldn’t have known better but there has to be something we can do.

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That is really sad. It sounds like he married her just for the extra pay. He should have been providing her some financial support as he did get extra money for being married in the form of BAH (housing allowance). If they were married during the deployment, he also received a separation allowance while he was gone.
If she files for divorce, she should speak to her lawyer about that – it can be sent directly to her as an allotment from his paycheck until the divorce is final and any alimony is set up. I’m very sorry that she is dealing with this. In these types of cases, the Chaplain on post can also typically be of some assistance. If for nothing else, he can provide the moral support she may need at this time.

I have a question that need to be answered to the best of some ones ability. I was just wondering, my husband is currently ETSing out of the Army. We are about 3 weeks from going home so its coming close ,but we were wondering when we will receive our BAH again because I know that we should receive it 1 last time in March’s payday.  So how soon will we receive the BAH after we leave here?

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You should continue to receive pay on schedule as long as he is considered active duty. His last paycheck will take longer than normal as they review his financial records to make sure his final paycheck is accurate. In my experience, it is anywhere from four to six weeks to get a final paycheck after ETS. Those who are retiring tend to get their final paycheck quicker than those who are discharging before retirement age.

Hi I’m an husband army spouse and me and my wife were recently stationed out in Ft Bliss TX. I’ve been looking up alot of information trying to find other army husbands that are in my same situation. Now I know it not that common that men Play the spouse role in the army but all I see is army wives programs on every site. Is there any one in my area with my same situation or is there a website designed for us that I can visit. Again I know it’s not common but I also know I’m not the only one. Please someone help me lol thanks

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There aren’t many programs (if any) out there that I know of specifically for Army husbands. I do have a few on my site despite the name (lol) at http://www.armywifechat.com. You should also check with your FRG about possibly setting up a group just for the husbands – that may be the easiest route. Good luck!

I moved up to be as close to my fiancée as I could be. The closest apartment that had availability is a little under an hour away from his duty station. It’s in a different county as well. The rent is outrageous, but living in a tent wasn’t an option. We got married and now he is stuck too far from work. Here is my question: his papers say he is stationed at Fort Drum, NY, and we live in a different county. Can we get out of the the lease because his papers say he is stationed there? How far away from the duty station must you live to be considered eligible to get out of your lease because the soldier isn’t at the duty station? Thanks so much!

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Usually, you can only break the lease with PCS for a duty station that is at least 50 miles away. Your best bet is to have JAG review your lease and look for a way out.

My boyfriend and I have been dating a little over a year. He just finished AIT and is now stationed at Ft. Sill Oklahoma for the next 10 months, until he gets deployed to Kuwait. I’m only 17 and he’s 19. Next year I plan on going to a private college here in my hometown in Texas. We were planning on getting married after he gets home from his deployment but we recently started talking about possibly getting married before he leaves, after I turn 18.

We’re wondering about financial benefits for me while he’s gone since I’ll be living on my own while going to college. He says the army would pay me $850 every month to pay for an apartment. Is this true? Also, where would I find out about army scholarships for college? Basically, I’m wondering if it would be better to marry him after he gets home or before he leaves. Please give me some info to help make the decision easier! Thank you!

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If you are married, you will get a housing allowance while he is deployed that is based on his rank and the zip code of his permanent duty station. That may or may not cover your living expenses while you are in college.

There are some education grant option such as through MyCAA – https://www.militaryonesource.com/MOS/FindInformation/Category/MilitarySpouseCareerAdvancementAccounts.aspx. There are also several scholarships specifically for military spouses. You could check with the education office on post to find out more about those possibilities.

I would like to offer one piece of advice though outside of the actual benefits. The first year of marriage can be difficult with all of the adjustments that come along with it. Adding a deployment to that will only make it harder. If it were me, I would wait until after the deployment is over so you can really spend time together in that first year of marriage.

Good luck with your decision!