Beautiful reader,

you have no idea how proud and excited I am to finally share my new website with you. I have been working with the talented Rebecca Pollock on the design, and Cathrine Vo has done the excellent job of making it all coded and functional. I am so happy with the result, and if I may say so myself; I think it is absolutely effing gorgeous!

If you are reading through another client, make sure you click this to have a look at the beauty with your own eyes!  There are lots of unique and beautiful details, so make sure you take a look around!

It’s when launching things like this it really becomes evident how far I have come and how much my life has changed over the last couple of years. I feel like I am stepping into my true calling. I feel like I am walking on the path that is only meant for me. And I feel that every challenge, every tear, every achievement has been there for a reason.

Without my darkest days – where I was very sick and depressed – I would not be the person I am today.

And without my happiest moments – where I have been exploring the world – I would not have been able to be so positive and hopeful.

All this really goes to show; Everything truly is possible.

But it doesn’t stop here!

Today, I am not only launching my website – I am also launching my workshop called Time Travel.

And no launch without goodies! Everyone who signs up for Time Travel before May 29th gets a free 1 hour private coaching session, my e-book and a secret present! Book now.

Are you a time traveler?

The time travel experience will help you take the dreams you have pushed far into the future – and make them come true sooner rather than later. Why wait when you can have everything you wish for already?

The 6 week long Time Travel Experience will take you on a journey through time and space. In our time together, we will explore your future, your past and your present – and by the time we are done you will have made big steps towards making your dreams come true.

Complete with 6 live calls, written material, homework and group support – this is a virtual journey you will never forget!

The Time Travel Experience is perfect for you who are ready to change – whether that be career change, lifestyle make-overs, bucket list dreams or overcoming personal challenges. Everything is possible!

Click here to read the itinerary and to book your spot.

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Do you like the new layout? Are you super-exited about Time Travelling with me? Share it in the comments!

PS. I also have a limited (and decreasing!) number of spots for private coaching. If this is more your thing; go here.

This is for the tired ones.

This is for the overworked, the chronically stressed, the busy ones.

This is for you who feel wired up – all the time.

This is for you who feel tired of life. Or more specifically; your life style.

You who feel like you have to keep on going (going, going, going) in order not to crash.

You who feel like your life is running faster than you can run along.

You who feel like you can’t keep up anymore.

This is for you who keep going, even though what you really need is to curl up under soft covers and not do anything for a week. To do nothing but read, watch movies and cuddle with your loved ones. To sleep until you wake up, naturally and rested. To have breakfast in bed, and then fall back to sleep. To do nothing, but be.

This is for you who dream of a beach vacation, but find yourself spending the majority of your time in traffic. Or behind a desk. Or in gloomy weather. This is for you who long to nap in the shade. This is for you who dream of building sand castles with your kids, or playing volleyball with your friends. This is for you who long to read chick lit and glossy magazines. This is for you who – when you close your eyes – wish you could hear ocean waves, but now you only hear ringing telephones and someone hammering on their keyboard. This is for you who long for a break from your life. For time to breathe.

This is for you who have important deadline coming up, but feel way past your maximum achievement level already. Who don’t have a choice but to keep on going. This is for you who get so stressed that you forget why you are doing this in the first place. Who feel that the why‘s gets lost in the what‘s and the how‘s. Who feel like what you are doing is pointless, but yet you keep on going. This is for you who long for time off. Who long for that day when you are done. Who don’t just deal with too much to do, but also I am not doing it well enough. This is for you who long for a life where your worth isn’t measured in how well you achieve. This is for you. Who want to feel good enough just because you are alive. Human. You.

This is for you who long to take care of yourself better, but just don’t have enough time. You who need coffee just to get through the day. You who need to treat yourself to a cupcake – just to bring that dreaded task up to a manageable level. You who wish you could go for long walks in the woods – instead of your efficient work-out on the treadmill. You who long for deeper connections, without having to say “nice to run into you, we need to catch up sometime“. You who long for something more. Something real.

This is for the tired, the exhausted, the stressed, the overworked, the fatigued, the overwhelmed, the achievers.

This is for the dreamers, the be-ings, the long-ers, the yearners, the wishers.

It doesn’t have to be like this.

You are not alone. It is okay to slow down. It is okay to be self-ish.

You only have one life. And you can live it the way that you want to. You can change jobs. Take unpaid vacation. Say no to things that don’t serve you. Call in sick. Ask for help.

Something is clearly not working, my darling.

You need to do something.

Before it’s too late. Before you get tired of life.

It takes courage. It takes no thank you‘s. It takes determination. It takes a little planning. It takes change.

But you can do it.

(If you want it.)

There’s hope.

And there are many of us.

Together we can break free from our stressful lives.

Together we can create a meaningful alternative.

Together we can change our worlds.

Dear tired friend, are you in?

Come on, let’s play on that beach.

Together.

xoxo,

PS. I have a limited number of spaces available for life coaching! Read more here.

PPS. Do you want more? Come on over to Facebook where I post inspiring images and texts daily!

You have a dream.

Or rather, you had a dream.

In fact, you had lots of them.

But then life happened. Bad things happened.
And worry crept into your life, sucking the wonderful energy out of you like a leech.

And now you feel flat.

Bored. Grey. Uninspired. Heavy.

And you don’t know how to get back the spark.
How to ignite.
How to get back ON.

You want fireworks and magic. You want long summer nights and belly laughs.
You want wonder and passion.

Heck, you don’t even ask for amazing, right now all you want is to feel a little bit better.

Anything is better than this limbo.

Right?

But baby, you don’t have to settle for less. The is hope – bucket loads of it.

Here are 17 tips to get back the spark in your life and feel alive again!

17 tips on how to invite passion and inspiration back into your life

Write a love list

Sit down with pen and paper and make a list of everything that you love. Include all the things, people and concepts you are attracted to, passionate about and interested in. Don’t limit yourself.

Take opposite action

Very often, what we most feel like doing is not what would help us the most. So if you’re having low energy – you often feel like hanging out at home, while getting out and doing something actually would be more helpful. The same thing goes for feeling uninspired – we often don’t feel like doing anything. So whatever it is you want to be doing right now – try experimenting with doing the opposite. Sometimes doing something you’ve never done before will excite and ignite you like nothing else.

Loosen up

Being uninspired and feeling detached often has a physical component, as we very often end up stationary or doing physically slow things. A good way to guide yourself to a better mental state is to do something physical, like dance, running, or hiking – or yoga. Anything that will move and stretch your body will help you thinking become more flexible too.

Do something fun and unusual

I know you’re not feeling it right now, but there’s nothing like doing something spontaneous when you’re uninspired. Try something you have never tried before, like a trapeze class, a photo safari or go to a lecture on a topic you know little about yet.

Pump up your creativity

Even though you might not feel particularly creative, doing something that requires you to stop thinking and start doing is usually a great way of getting inspired. If you need ideas – try fingerprinting, writing or crafting something with your hands. Pinterest is great for DIY ideas!

Talk about your dreams

Tell a friend about something you would like to do one day. Try to describe it in as much detail as possible. If you don’t have a friend you can talk to about this, try writing it all out. See if you can reconnect with a dream by thinking differently, or connect with a new dream entirely.

Smile and laugh more

Smiling and lauging – even faking it – will make you feel happier. I’m not encouraging false laughs here, but if you are feeling low and uninspired, try watching a comedy or just smiling to strangers. This totally works! You might feel goofy, but if that can make you laugh of yourself – even better!

Focus on what you are feeling, not what you aren’t

As the Buddha said; “Suffering is arguing with reality”. When you are feeling flat, uninspired and tired – but feel like you should be feeling passionate and excited about something – you feel even worse than if you just focus on what you actually are feeling.

Do what interests you the most

You might feel like nothing excites you. Like you don’t have anything. But I’m sure there is something in this wide world of possibilities that is more interesting than other things. You don’t have to be wildly in love – just moderately curious. Start there.

Read Feeling Good when Life is Hard

A little shameless self-promotion is allowed from time to time, right? No, seriously – I have written a whole e-book about how to feel good in times of stress, overwhelm and change. I have a full chapter on identifying and following dreams in there. It’s good!

Let nature hold you

Sometimes all we need to get back on track is to allow ourselves to be off track for a bit. Take a walk in nature, walk barefoot on the beach, lie down in the grass and feel the earth support you. Relax, then move on.

Pay attention to your black and white thinking

When we are not in our element, it is very easy to slip into absolute thinking. As in “I am never inspired. Or I am not interested in anything. Or I always feel stuck”. Watch out for words like never, always, nothing, everything, everybody, nobody, everywhere, anywhere etc. Try to see if there is a good middle way in there. A good way of checking your thinking is to ask yourself “is this true?” whenever you catch yourself thinking in absolute terms.

Don’t be avoidant, isolate yourself or over-think

One of the best pieces of advice someone gave me when I was searching for my purpose and passion was to don’t avoid doing things that need to be done (like paperwork and housework), don’t isolate yourself by staying in too much, and don’t think too much about what to do, why it’s not working, where to go and so on. In other words; do the work, get out there and spend more time acting than thinking!

Be limitless

So much of our stuck-ness originate from these short words; can’t, won’t and shouldn’t. So when you are searching for your spark – don’t limit yourself. Do it anyways!

Hire a life coach

Life coaches – like me – are experts at helping people find more passion, excitement and energy in their lives. Why fumble around in the dark when you can have someone guide your way?

Accept

It is what it is. And right now you are not in the zone. And that is alright! Just accepting that can make all the difference in the world. It’s like deciding to stop looking for a boyfriend and then suddenly there he is!

Check yourself for depression

I feel that it is important to address this topic too. Loss of interest, flatness in emotions and loss of energy can be symptoms of depression. It’s better to be safe than sorry – the sooner you get treatment the easier it will be. So if you think this might be you, don’t hesitate to get help.

…

What advice would you give to people who feel like they have lost their spark?

I have big news: My coaching practice is now open! Head over to the page and read more about how I can help you create a magical, wildly exciting life!

 
Feel safe.

Close your eyes.

Lie down in the soft grass, and feel how the earth vibrates with life.

For a moment of mercy, let yourself be held.

Hand over the responsibility, just for the time it takes to regain your strength. Say I just can’t do this alone.

Say I’m worth helping – and mean it.

Disregard the voice that says you don’t deserve it.

Disregard the people who say you don’t need it.

Disregard the lies your mind is telling you about life –  again and again.

Just one more time, just work a little harder, just sleep a little less.

It’s all lies and you know it.

Listen instead to that voice who knows what you need.

Let yourself be carried and cared for. Let yourself be.

Imagine walking barefoot near the ocean. Imagine wandering deep, deep forests. Imagine peace.

Put all your worries into this beautiful basket. Let me carry it for you while you sleep.

Let me watch over you.

You are safe with me.

Troubled?
Then stay with me, for I am not. – Hafiz

Feel the pulse of the Pachamama like drumbeats under your feet.

Walk towards the sunrise.

Open your arms. Say yes to life.

Don’t look back.

Welcome to the land of possibility.

May you find some comfort here.

I have big news: My coaching practice is now open! To celebrate, I am giving away 5 1-hour Free Flow Sessions to 5 lucky winners. Read more & enter here. Deadline Friday May 3rd.

You have this dream, but you don’t quite know how to make it come true.

You have this deep, deep longing, but you feel so overwhelmed.

You know something needs to change – right now – but the thought of it makes you freeze with fear.

You feel really, really stuck – and you don’t know what is blocking you because you don’t even know where you are going.

And to top it all off, you feel incredibly lonely – because everyone you know is on a path that seems much clearer and safer and sane than yours.

Trust me, I know how it feels.

I have felt deep, deep loneliness.

I have experienced excruciating fear of change.

And I know overwhelm like the back of my hand.

Which is why I yearn to help you with all of my being.

Which is why I trained to become a life coach. Which is why I am perfect to help you change your life.

I wish I was the kind of person to throw a big launch party. Gather a group of friends, make virtual firework and the internet version of a red carpet party. I wish I was the type of person who had guest posts and blog tours and lots and lots of carefully planned “leaks” of the secret project in the weeks leading up to a launch.

But I’m not. At least not right now.

I am more a fan of subtle action. Heartfelt, soulful – but still impactful – action.

Truth is, I have had writing this announcement on my to-do list for weeks now. But I haven’t found the right words. Nothing I wrote felt “Schwung” enough. I didn’t feel comfortable with the screaming words and the flashy advertising.

I was trying to be someone I’m not. I wasn’t being authentic.

Because the truth is, I just want to be of service. From the bottom of my heart.

So here is the BIG news:

The wait is over! I am hereby cutting the ribbon – and opening the doors to my private life coaching practice.

That’s right – I am open for business. Today!

No party without presents: Even though the launch is soft and humble, the prizes are not!

I am giving away 5 FREE 1-hour Free Flow Sessions. In one hour, we will explore an area of your life where you feel blocked – and make you feel free, energized and ready to roll.

Here is how to win:

1. Go to this page and read my offering.
2. Leave a comment on this post and share why you think life coaching will be beneficial to you.
3. Tweet or share this post on Facebook.

I will pick 5 lucky people who will be contacted on May 3rd.

Much love & thank you for believing in me,

“I can’t do that.”

She said. And just like that she had brushed off the entire future she wanted.

She had just told me about her dream of going back to school to become a psychologist.

I could tell by the way her eyes sparkled and flared up when she talked about it, that this was what she was here on earth to do. Help people. Heal people. Be a beacon of hope for those who have lost faith in life.

“I mean, what would people think?”

She looked at me, bewildered.

It would take a lot of determination to pull it off, of course. At the age of 27 she had just graduated with a degree in economics. She had landed her first full time office job. She was successful in her field – and she had just signed the contract to buy her first apartment.

She was also very unhappy.

“Just think about how much money it would cost.” She added. “I should have thought about this years ago. Now it’s too late. I am too old, and what if I change my mind half-way through? Everything I have worked for and achieved so far would be a waste!”

The sparkly excitement in her eyes was gone.

“You know, I really want to do this,” she added thoughtfully, “but I am just so scared and overwhelmed. I don’t know what to do.”

Bingo. 

As a life coach, I have an interesting relationship with the concept of Limiting Beliefs.

Failure Thoughts. Or better yet – Dreamkiller Convictions.

Let’s face it. We all have these thoughts that we can’t seem to shake off. Those thoughts we have on repeat  – and they have been on for years.

“I can’t, I shouldn’t, I don’t have, I’m not, I’m too…”

When I’m coaching, I hear it again and again and again.

…which of course has made me super-aware of it in my own thinking too. Because I am no exception!

Last week I had a session with my own life coach. And we shared some laughs when I immediately after telling her “I can’t do that” realized how silly it sounded. Of course I can! And this is the beauty of sharing your questions, concerns and reasons with another human being – sometimes it simply takes two brains to realize how limiting, loser and dreamkilling our thoughts really are.

Being passionate about dreaming big – and being a firm believer that everything is possible – you can only imagine how many times a day I run into this kind of thinking in myself and others. So to help you become super-aware of your own Dreamkiller Convictions – and to show you how to turn these nasty thoughts around – here is a list of your top 27 limiting beliefs. And yes, you heard me: All these thoughts are real life examples from e-mails, comments, FB replies, tweets and conversations with your fellow readers of the Freedom Experiment. Warning: This might change your life…

27 thoughts that are holding you back
(and how to turn them around!)

“I don’t have time”

Think about it. Is this true? I mean, is this really true? Making dreams come true is all about making priorities. I hereby challenge you to think; what is the real reason why you don’t want to do what you say you don’t have time for?

“Don’t say you don’t have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Pasteur, Michaelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.”
― H. Jackson Brown Jr.

“I don’t have the money” or “I can’t afford it”

I realize money is tight. I realize you are working day and night to cover the bills. I get that. But you only live once. Can you give up a few small luxuries to make room for the delayed gratification of making your dream come true? Everything is possible. Take an extra job,  sell something, get a roommate, move back in with your parents for a while, cook at home, make a real budget, figure out how much your dream really will cost (hint: it’s way less than you think!). What are you willing to sacrifice to get to where you want to go?

“I can’t do it”

You can’t? Or you won’t? There’s a huge difference between these two ways of thinking. Again, I think this is a cover thought for something way more juicy. What is the reason why you say you can’t? As you can see from the story above, there were a long list of limiting beliefs hidden underneath the initial statement of “I can’t”. What is your story?

“I’m not good/smart/pretty/talented/skilled/educated enough”

Okay, we both know that this is just fear speaking, right? …Right!? We all think this – it doesn’t matter if you are a common soul or a superstar. Just think about it. What if Martin Luther King let this thought stop him? I’m not a good enough speaker. Or J.K. Rowling; I don’t have enough experience with writing. Or Adele; I’m not pretty enough to be a singer? I mean, come on. The world needs YOU.

“I’m too scared”

This is a valid excuse. Following your dreams is scary. I won’t lie and tell you that I don’t have butterflies when I take big steps toward my dream. In fact,  every time I do something that matters to me, I am scared. Because it means something to me. And this is exactly why you can’t let fear stop you. Realize your fear is there for a reason. Say hello to it. And then keep going.

“My parents/friends/significant other/family don’t believe in me”

So many of us live double lives because we have people in our lives that either don’t believe in us – or we assume they don’t believe in us. However, by continuing to study pharmacy when you really want to be a professional singer, juuuust to please somebody else you are only fooling yourself. The thing is, people around us are mirrors. If you present your new idea and radiate doubt – people will doubt you. If you announce your new plans with confidence – people will believe in you. So take care of your own beliefs first. The rest will follow.

“What would people think?”

People who? And why does it really matter? What you think is way more important. It is your life.

“What if I change my mind?”

Yes, that may happen. What then? Well, you change your mind. You do something else. You move on. Changing your mind is not the end of the world, and it is very normal. I think it used to be expected of us to find a job and stay in it until we receive a gold watch. But not any more! Go for it with your whole heart, and if/when you change your mind – do it fully. You only live once.

“I don’t know how to do this”

If you are having this thought and it is holding you back, you’re lucky. Because this, my friend, is very easily fixable. Basically, you have three options: 1) You google it, 2) You ask someone or 3) you try and fail and repeat. Go!

“I don’t know what do to”

This thought is common, and it can mean two things. Either you are having trouble prioritizing – or you have a difficult choice to make. Either way, you can fix this. Make a list of priorities and start at the top. Make the decision and get going. You can do this!

“I’m not making progress with this”

I know, baby. And it’s hard! I get that! But you have come so far. You have worked so hard. And it will work out in the end, I promise. Start living like you are making progress. Meditate on being ready. Are you really ready? Ask for what you want and be open. Life is not static. You will move forward, eventually. It may not happen the way you want it to, when you want it. But something will happen. Trust me.

“It’s impossible”

Repeat after me: Everything. Is. Possible. There have been people on the moon, we are freakin’ flying all over the globe these days – and people without legs are running marathons. Seriously, nothing is impossible. You can do this!

“I don’t deserve it”

Darling, is this true? Why not? There is absolutely no reason why you shouldn’t deserve it. You are a child of the universe. You are precious and sacred and worthy. It’s time you start believing it.

“I don’t have the motivation”

Maybe it’s time to question why you want to do something in the first place. Life is too short to do something just because you made a decision to do it ages ago. But watch out, because this thought is very sneaky. You could simply be demotivated because you are tired, overwhelmed or have other concerns and worries on your plate right now. There may be other limiting beliefs hidden beneath this too. So investigate before you invest … or something like that.

“I should/have to … instead”

Well, we all have things we should do. But to be honest, what is really more important than living the life you want? Things society expects us to do? Things you expect yourself to do? It’s all about making deliberate choices. If what you think you should do interferes with what you really want to do, then you have some thinking to do.

“I don’t know where to go with this…”

There is one good way of finding it out. Try something – and succeed, fail or something in between. Then try again. And again. And again.

“I just can’t let go & forgive”

This thought is a mega stuck-sucking-machine. I know you were hurt badly, but there is only one way to forgive, and it doesn’t happen magically. You are the one in charge! In order to forgive and let you, you need to be willing. Without willingness to forgive, you’ll be stuck. But if you realize how much this is holding you back, being willing to forgive is something that is serving you, not the person who hurt you in the first place.

“It’s all hopeless”

Oh, no. No-no-no-no-no. There is always hope. Keep trying, keep praying, keep wishing, keep sending out good vibes. Never, ever, give up.

“I’m stuck”

I know, darling. And this thought is a nasty one, because the more you think it the more stuck you will be. But like some of the other thoughts above, this is a cover thought. There is another limiting belief under there somewhere. Keep looking and you will find it. Then deal with that.

“I’m too overwhelmed”

Yes, you are overwhelmed. The bad news is that it won’t go away. The good news is that there is a simple solution. Take one small step at a time. You will get there.

“I feel so unsure…”

Again, waiting for this feeling to pass won’t get you anywhere. Trying something will. If it ends up being the wrong thing, then try something else. Change your mind. Turn around, turn things upside down. The cure for insecurity is to do what you are afraid of and then realize it was nothing to fear in the first place.

“I don’t have the energy”

We all have a limited amount of energy. So if you don’t have any power left to do what you really want to do, then chances are that you might be spending yours on something that isn’t serving you. Pay attention to energy suckers too. Do you have people in your life, things to do or a job that is leaving you exhausted? Change it.

“I’m too old/young”

There are 90 year-old’s who travel the world. There are 90 year-old’s who are doing yoga and who are much bendier than you. There are old people living freakin’ awesome lives. So why do you think you are too old? I say B-shit. you only have one life. Live it!

“It’s too late”

It is never too late. Never. Ever. Ever.

Over to you. What is your most frequent limiting belief? Share it in the comments!

Are you on Facebook? Every day, I post an inspiring quote, photo or reflection. Come on over and join the conversation!

There’s nothing quite like getting lost in a good book. And although it might seem like there are too many books to read and not enough time – I think we all can agree that the books that are life changing are relatively few compared to the number of books out there.

I read a lot of books. Fiction, non-fiction, personal development, business. And I can honestly say that these are the ones that have changed my life. Nothing more, nothing less.

I think these books should be taught in schools. I think you should view them all together as required reading to learn how to live.

Because these are the books that have taught me how. To live. To love. To be.

Make a huge cup of tea.

And dig in!

Personal Development

Finding your own North Star – Martha Beck

You have to read this because: This will be your guide through life as you go through the change cycle.

Finding your Way in a Wild New World – Martha Beck

You have to read this because: It will give you very important knowledge about what is happening in the world right now.

The Fire Starter Sessions – Danielle LaPorte

You have to read this because: You need it to better understand yourself and what you are here on earth to do.

Loving What Is – Byron Katie

You have to read this because: This book will teach you how to change your negative thoughts.

Spirit Junkie – Gabrielle Bernstein

You have to read this because: This book will introduce you to spirituality.

Sabbath – Wayne Muller

You have to read this because: You have to learn how to relax.

Health and Nutrition

Crazy, Sexy Diet – Kris Carr

You have to read this because: You need to learn about how to take care of yourself

Skinny Bitch – Rory Freedman

You have to read this because: It’s time to get real about what you put into your body.

Women, Food and God – Geneen Roth

You have to read this because: we all struggle with emotional eating. Here’s how to break it.

The 4-Hour Body – Timothy Ferriss

You have to read this because: You will learn a whole new way of thinking about your body.

Love is Under my Skin – Ateka

You have to read this because: This is so much more than a yoga book.

Novels and Memoirs

The Night Circus – Erin Morgenstern

You have to read this because: You will be in a magical dreamland for hours on end!

Life of Pi – Yann Martel

You have to read this because: It’s an incredible story (and so much better than the movie!)

Siddharta – Herman Hesse

You have to read this because: It’s simply beautiful.

1Q84 – Haruki Murakami

You have to read this because: This is a masterpiece.

Shantaram – Gregory David Roberts

You have to read this because: It’s my all time favorite book and I think you should experience it!

A Life Without Limits – Chrissie Wellington

You have to read this because: It is a huge inspiration and motivation booster!

Wild – Cheryl Strayed

You have to read this because: This book will teach you about surviving alone.

Which books did I forget? Leave a comment with your top 3 books that should be required reading for life!

Decisions.

Just saying that word aloud makes me cringe.

And we are not talking about what brand of milk to buy (hint: try almond milk!) and how often to shampoo your hair. No, we are not talking about the millions of decisions you make – consciously and unconsciously – every single day. We are talking about the big stuff.

The do-I-choose-my-dream-or-do-I-choose-love kind of decision.

The do-I-go-to-my-dream-college-or-do-I-choose-the-one-where-I-get-a-scholarship kind of question.

The dream vs. smart choice kind of decision.

I can see you nodding. Uh-uhm.

We have all been there.

And I take it you are well aware of the haunting feeling of ambivalence that is accompanying this decision of ours. The dreadful confusion, the overwhelm and the anxiety. That feeling when you can’t imagine either one of your options because they both feel impossible. As in, you would rather die than choose one over the other.

Oh yes.

Been there. Done that.

And yet – we all seem to end up in the same dreadful place over and over again. New impossible decision to make. New impossible options. Hello ambivalence.

But I tell you – it doesn’t have to be this hard.

Decisions … are inevitable. But dread?

Optional.

The Body Compass

Your body is a fine machine. You might not always point towards north, but your body knows you far more intimately than you will ever know your body. It’s no wonder then, that the body can be a powerful navigation tool when you are feeling lost. In other words; your body compass will always point towards your truth.

Personally, I have used this approach – which I learned from Martha Beck – on a wide range of different issues. When you get used to it, navigating life with your body as your compass (and your dreams as your map) becomes second nature. However, in the beginning it takes a little effort and a little getting used to.

The way a compass needs to be calibrated, so does your body.

The way to do this is to think about a nice experience – something that would earn a score of +7 and above on a -10 to +10 scale. Load this happy memory into your mind and stay in that lovely space for a little while. How do you feel this in your body? When I think about my happy memory, I feel an opening in my chest, a warm sensation in my belly, and a relaxing feeling in my arms and legs. Your experience may be totally different, so pay attention to how this feels for you. This is your compass pointing YES.

Then load a memory that would earn a score of -7 or below on the scale. This might feel a little hard, as this is going to stir up some negative emotions in you. Try not to linger too long on the negative emotion per se, but take a look at how you feel in your body. When I do this, I feel a tightening in my belly, a tenseness in my shoulders, I flex my calf muscles and I tighten my jaw. This is your compass pointing NO.

Now, it’s time to use your calibrated compass on your decision. Think about the different options that you have to choose between. Imagine choosing one over the other. Then pay attention to how this makes your body feel. On a scale from -10 to +10 – how does this make you feel in your body? Is your body reacting more like you did when you recalled the happy memory? Or the bad memory? Do you feel like shackles on? Or shackles off?

Then repeat with your other options. Which option makes your body react with the highest score?

This, my friend, is your answer.

 …

Over to you: Do you use your body when making decisions? What is your top tip for making a hard choice?

I know this game we’re all playing – making dreams come true – feels a lot like catching stars.

Impossible.

It’s like we’re running around in this big field, stretching for the sky, desperately trying to reach. We think that if we could just extend a little bit more and reach a little bit higher, we will make it. But no matter how much we try, of course, we won’t.

And we feel sad.

But then we try again. We wait for that bright, cold, crisp night – and we try again. A little more half-hearted this time. But to no avail.

The distance is just to far.

And this is where most dreamers give up. When the distance between the future you want and the life you are living now is so large that it seems incomprehensible that you would ever make it.

Like the distance between the earth and the stars, which is 1/0.75 = 1.33 parsecs.

Because making your dream come true will take years, at best.

Light-years.

And I know it’s tough. I know you want to give up. I know you feel lost, overwhelmed, scared and oh so far away from home.

But please don’t stop here. Keep going. Because what I will tell you next might change your whole game.

What if I told you that your problem isn’t the distance between now and the future, but the way you are thinking about the future in the first place?

You think it’s so far away.

Infinite.

But let me tell you something. What you dream about – whether it is health, wealth, love or adventure – doesn’t have to be some distant vague thing you might achieve some day if you are really fortunate.

Born under a lucky star.

Making your dreams come true can and will happen a lot faster than you think.

You just have to think right.

Stop pushing your dream away and say to yourself that making it happen is going to be hard.

Open yourself up to the fact that it might actually be easy. Open yourself up to possibility. To wonder. To exploration.

Start with thinking it’s possible.

Continue with the willingness to accept that it might not happen when you want it, and it might not happen the way you want it to be.

But if you learn to think different – I promise you that dreams come true.

Dreaming, after all, is a lot more practical than catching stars.

… Wait, did you see that star falling?

Make a wish.

PS. Are you on Facebook? Every day I post an inspiring picture and a reflection. We also have some great conversations! Come on over!

Dear life,

Give me truth. Give me something I can hold on to when the world around me trembles.

Give me something beautiful, something impossible, something larger than myself.

Give me the strength I need to see, the beauty that already lies within me.

Give me something meaningful. Give me something I can believe in.

Give me someone who will listen when my voice is only a whisper.

Give me me a safe haven where I can let down my guard and rest – if only for a second.

Give me peace, in my mind, in my heart, in my soul. Give me calmness.

Give me a moment of stillness, a ceasefire from the war that is going on within me.

Give me a warm embrace, a hand to hold through it all.

Dear life,

Give me contentment. Fill me up.

Give me courage to enjoy my own company. Give me what I need to embrace solitude.

Give me laughter and joy.

Give me energy. Give me power. Give me confidence.

Give me a way of loving myself. Show me how to take care of the child that lives within me.

Give me compassion for all living beings. Give me love.

Dear life,

Give me fearlessness so that I can stand up for myself and what I believe in.

Give me hope for the future.

Give me something bright, something incredible and light.

Give me love. Give me acceptance of myself and others.

Give me a heart that is open for everyone.

Give me support when I need it the most.

Give me forgiveness and the ability to forgive.

Give me the power to help people heal.

Give me a touch that can wipe people’s tears away.

Give me eyes that can see through hatred and see only love.

Give me hand that can hold the space for everything that is important.

Dear life,

most of all give me wisdom and courage to ask for what I need on my journey through this world.

Make me a shepherd for the lost and broken hearted.

Make me a light in the darkness.

Make me a beacon of hope.

And I will be forever grateful.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.