The Great Oz Adventure!

Connections and Disconnections

2010-03-18T14:38:00.004+11:00

Had a visit yesterday from a friend I used to work with.

It was weird. I felt like he hadn't changed a bit in the past 2 years (and he will probably agree), while so much has happened in my own life. In a sense, I've moved on, but we are still connected by our shared work experience and the people we know.

When he asked me to tell him about what my life is like here, I couldn't summon up the words or the energy. I have no problem sharing with moms at school and friends from church. They are people I see regularly and who already know a bit about my family life. With people who aren't in the overlapping circles of social connection, it's harder. Where do I begin? What can I say that won't bore them? Stories about what my kids love, say and do - like the girls' attempt to sing the Three Bears Song from Korean drama Full House - are fascinating only to people in the inner circle: parents, grandparents, aunts, and close girlfriends with kids of a similar age.

The gender issue is real. Most guys I know, even the ones with families of their own, aren't interested in 'too much information' and don't enthuse the same way about a toddler's achievements like a girlfriend would.

I suppose this is that season of life where my family commitments guide my social connections. I have only so much time and energy in the day, and I must exclude some for the sake of being available for those who are happy to accept that my availability, attention and even my conversation is defined by my children.

I guess that makes me the stereotype of a rather boring housewife. :)

Stuck at Assignment 7

2010-02-23T10:53:00.002+11:00

I have been stuck forever at my 7th assignment.

The first time it came back, I was asked to resubmit Part C, the copyediting and proofreading exercise.

I ignored it the whole of the summer hols, started work on it when Beth went back to school, and received the result yesterday.

"Thank you for resubmitting Part C of your Assignment 7.

It pains me to ask you to resubmit this again rather than spell out the problems and give you a lower mark...

There is not a lot of work to do and I am sure it will not take you long to send me a super assignment."

The trouble with notching up Ds and High Ds from the start of the course is that it makes this latest setback particularly irksome. I thought I'd thrown in everything when I re-worked the assignment, but I guess I was wrong. I still have much to learn about the difference between copyediting marks and proofreading marks.

As the Jedi Masters constantly exhort their Padawans, I need to detach myself from my emotions and just focus on what needs doing.

Time to Stand and Stare

2010-02-23T10:11:00.004+11:00

One of the privileges of my WAHM lifestyle is that I get to witness those tiny but often significant episodes as I go about my daily routine.

Let me share a couple of vignettes.

Episode One

Waiting outside the post office this morning, I saw a familiar face headed in my direction.

Rose and her family are long-time friends of ours; our shared history dates from when we were new migrants. Our girls went to the same Council kinder(3 years ago!), so for a whole year we saw each other almost everyday. These days, we hardly meet, as the children go to different schools, have different after-school activities etc. You might say our lives run in parallel, similar direction but rarely intersecting. The last time I ran into Rose (again at the Plaza), we had a lovely long chat that began with mutual cheek-touching and ended with affectionate goodbyes and regards to one another's families. That's the kind of friendship we have.

Today Rose asked what I was doing at the Plaza, and I waved the A4-sized envelope I was carrying.

"I'm enrolling Jordanne for kinder ... Can you believe it? She's not a baby anymore!"

This was followed by several minutes of marvelling over how quickly the kids have grown up.

Episode Two

Several persons ahead of me in the queue was a couple. They looked like they might have been in their late 50s or early 60s. The hubby was tall and burly, with a huge paunch hanging out over his belt. The wife was several heads shorter, slim, serene and beautiful as only a contented midlifer can be.

The wife had a huge smile on her face as she looked around her, and I thought to myself, what a lovely lady.

She leaned back against her hubby, whose belly met her upper back, and he started nudging and bouncing her with his belly the way a father would amuse a toddler. She turned around, laughing up at him and saying something audible only to both of them, and he looked down with affectionate amusement on his face.

In that moment, I thought to myself: How beautiful. I hope CA and I will still be enjoying each other like that when we reach their age.

Grade Two Already?

2010-02-02T10:05:00.002+11:00

The start of the school year brings with it a certain sense of anticipation, of opportunity, of great things that could happen.

Beth and I have been preparing for this year, particularly in Jan, with lots of short random exposures to online general knowledge quizzes (she loves the history of Ancient Greece), assessment books and some hard thinking about what she can and should achieve.

For Math, the goal is to get her to memorize as much of the times table as she can manage. I know she probably compares dismally with her Sg peers, but I'm trying not to stress us both out. I just want to get her to a level where she can 'get it' and start to be more self-directed in her motivation and desire to learn.

For Chinese, we're continuing with the Werribee Chinese School, which this year has moved to Point Cook Community Centre, a much nicer learning environment than Glen Orden PS. I told Beth her Chinese school is located next to the new Point Cook library. She loves books, so a trip to the library will be one of the motivators for turning up to class every Sat and doing her homework, which from this year on will be required to be done daily.

I'm glad the WCS is starting to demand more of its students. There was a time when I was weighing up whether to continue with the school. Being a community language school, it caters to the middle (or even the lower spectrum, meaning those who come from non-Chinese backgrounds) and asks so little of its students, which of course translates into mediocre language outcomes. I even rang the Braybrook Xin Jin Shan Language School, but they don't have classes for Beth's age group. Pity. I might enrol Jordanne next year though, so that she gets a headstart in learning the language.

For music, Beth is starting her third year with Yamaha.

The old question of private-vs-group tuition is looming again, for a very practical reason. If she is to meet the entry requirements for a music scholarship, she must have at least a Grade 5 AMEB at Year 7. Working backwards, this is the year she should start on her AMEB. At the rate she is going, I'm not sure she is even equipped to sit an exam. She still struggles to sight-read and prefers to play from memory. When I try to teach her, she gets upset and I get exasperated and lose my temper. I keep thinking: why can't you focus? Why aren't you sitting up properly? What do you mean you can't read the music? A qualified, experienced teacher who loves working with kids would probably take a more positive approach.

Beth's after-school schedule is even more packed than 2009.
Wed - swimming
Thu - jujitsu
Sat - music and Chinese

Most of her classes are for an hour, except for swimming (30 mins) and Chinese (3 hrs!!). It's the driving back and forth that takes up so much time. But I shouldn't complain. I'm helping (I hope) to build my child's character, resilience, social and kinesthetic intelligence.

When Does The Sun Rise And Set In Melbourne?

2010-01-12T10:32:00.003+11:00

Stumbled on this nugget while trying to find out what time sunset will take place in Q2.

This page works out the times for sunrise and sunset when you select the month and year you want.

For example, if I select May 2010, I learn that the sun rises between 7.01 and 7.25 (rising later as we progress into winter) and sets between 5.33 and 5.10 (setting later as the month draws to a close, meaning the days get shorter).

It's very handy when you need to make decisions like 'Which are the months to avoid if I send my child to sports activities, given that I can't see well enough to drive once the sun sets?' and 'Should I sign my child up for the 6-7 pm class or the 6.30-7.30 pm class?'

Answer: Avoid Terms 2 and 3.

Next thing to do: Get a pair of glasses with yellow lenses to improve night driving capability.

Thoughts on our first family camping trip

2010-01-11T15:22:00.005+11:00

9 Jan 2010 will remain one of our family's fondest memories.

That was the day we finally - after months of talking and surfing the net and planning - experienced what it was like to go camping like any regular Aussie.

Imagine a whole bunch of strangers congregating in one sprawling tourist park for the same reason: pitching tents, setting up deck chairs, grilling dinner over a Weber, gathering around a fire to sing American Pie to guitar accompaniment (very good singing and strumming it was too), teens trying out dance moves and doing handstands, kids running barefoot, friends drinking beer and chatting late into the night while the sun refused to go down till after 9 pm.

The most magical moment must have been when we were snugly tucked in under our quilt listening to all the activity that was still going on outside. Knowing that we were not alone, that we were part of this massive meeting of strangers-with-a-common-purpose, at whom we smile and nod but will probably not see again.

Wow.

Even the accommodation options were amazing.

There were caravans and campervans. The van next in the next space proclaimed Wicked Campers. (We later saw a number of Wicked Campers vans on the GOR on our way home.)

People who had brought only their tents (like us) and people who had brought their entire outdoor furniture sets.

People who had their own BBQ equipment and were barbequing like old pros, and people who used the camp kitchen to rustle up instant noodles and luncheon meat (like us).

People with boats.

The Great Ocean Road Tourist Park is perfect for first-time campers. It's got cabins, a central brick building housing the bathrooms and laundry, another building for kitchen and indoor games, a playground, and a huge grassy area for the powered and unpowered sites with the numbers of the lots painted on the grass.

And the cost?

$42 for one night for the four of us. You can't get much cheaper, unless you go bush (no thanks....yet!).

We're thinking Wilsons Prom next.

And Philip Island. Anglesea. Lorne. Torquay. Warrnambool.

Travelling in Australia is double the fun when you can save heaps of $$ by camping.

The savings can go to special treats, like Timboon Fine Ice Cream - Mmmm!

2010: A New Decade Begins

2010-01-02T19:08:00.005+11:00

It doesn't seem so long ago that I was counting down to the new school term.

We're now two days into 2010 and I'm thinking: where have the hols gone? A couple of weeks more and we'll be back into the grind of morning rush hour, afternoon swim lessons, Sat keyboard and Chinese class...

On 30 Dec, Mandy organized for the Sunday School kids to watch Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel, at Werribee Regina Cinemas. My good intentions of going for the 10.45 Body Vive class at Fenix Fitness were scuttled when Beth insisted tearfully that I be with her for the movie. This is my second visit to the cinema in three years, a record I am proud of. Cinema tickets cost a fortune here. $16 for an adult ticket! And a medium popcorn costs $6.50. How do ordinary families afford it?

On New Year's Eve, we invited our friends Michael and Clara over for dinner. On the menu were Hainanese Chicken Rice (anything is possible with Prima Paste), Thai green curry, fish assam pedas, pappadum and a lovely choc mud cake with ice cream after the countdown and the TV screening of Lord of the Rings: Return of the King (a movie Michael commented never seemed to end).

We had such a good time that the following night, it was our turn to be guests at Michael and Clara's. Pizzas, heaps of cushions, a game of Monopoly between Michael and Beth, and two movies: Monkey Magic and Forbidden Kingdom. Both movies had Sun Wukong as the central character. MM was pure comedy (audio in Japanese) , FK was drama/fantasy with a nice spin. An American (Anglo Saxon) teenage boy is magically taken back in time by the staff of Sun Wukong and is dragged into the conflict between the evil Jade Warlord and the fearsome Witch reared by werewolves on one side, and an unlikely trio ( two monks and a young girl bent on vengeance) who are trying to defeat the Jade Warlord and recover Sun Wukong's missing staff before it falls into the enemy's hands. The boy eventually helps to resurrect Sun Wukong, who has been turned into a stone monkey by the Jade Warlord.

Today, we drove to Abbotsford to check out the Convent Arts Precinct and Collingwood Children's Farm.

We particularly enjoyed lunching at Lentil As Anything, a vegetarian restaurant staffed by volunteers where you pay as you feel. They were running a buffet lunch when we were there and the kids loved the food, which is saying something as there were no pizzas, pasta, chips or fries in sight. Beth had the privilege of putting our contribution into the wooden money chest on the counter. There's something very special and inspiring about coming to a place where nothing is expected of you, everyone is friendly and you know you're doing your little bit to be part of something that is creating a greater good.

Another reason we're grateful to be living in AUS, where there is always something new to see and do every weekend.

Summer Project

2009-12-22T22:48:00.007+11:00

We are researching caravan parks in preparation for The Great Camping Adventure, which hubby has thrown up for consideration over many months with mounting excitement (not a shared sentiment though).

The resident kuniang (Pampered Princess) is being reluctantly co-opted into an outing that is bound to involve pesky mozzies, summer flies, minimal hygiene, inclement weather conditions and other unmentionables.

What kind of holiday is one without a 5-star resort, pool and luxury spa?

It used to be 2-2, with Beth and I being on the same side (the Dark side, some might say!).

She has somehow fallen under the spell of outdoorsy Dad's tempting tales of going bush, camping under the stars and all that boot camp stuff and straightaway fell to unpacking the tent he had just bought.

She even tried to read the instruction manual, but failed.

And asked me for help.

Which of course was no help at all.

Dad finally came to the rescue.

Father and Daughter eventually worked out how to peg the tent, and got it set up all ready for The Big Day.

In the meantime, Beth and Jordanne can have fun with their new cubbyhouse!

Maybe I should organize a couple of play dates between now and when we go camping...

The Gingerbread Man Comes To Play

2009-12-16T12:29:00.004+11:00

Day 7 of the school hols.

Last night, we were at our friend Kathleen's for a dinner-cum-meeting for her impending one-year missions trip to S Africa. God has spoken to her and she will be volunteering at AIDS orphanages in Pretoria with Operation Mobilisation.

My job in 2010 is to be Kat's accountability and morale support star. To encourage, hold her to account, let her know the church loves and remembers and is praying for her. To do everything I can to keep up her spirits as she goes on her life-changing adventure.

I don't think I'll ever have the courage to do what she is doing. Scott Wesley-Brown's song Please Don't Send Me To Africa has long been my silent prayer whenever CA (teasingly) suggests that God might send me out as a missionary. :-(

The forecast for today is 39 deg.

Beth and I did our shopping straight after dropping Jordanne off at daycare, while it was still reasonably cool.

Couldn't help noticing the disparity between our dressing and other shoppers'. They were in tank tops, shorts, sun dresses. Beth had on a long-sleeved T and trackies, I had on a polo shirt and jeans. In our family, we do take SunSmart-ness to an extreme. ;-)

We bought a nice piece of salmon from the fishmonger, and a kilo of chicken thigh fillet with which to cook Hainanese Chicken Rice. (The authentic way is to use a whole chicken, but you're not getting this squeamish chef to handle a WHOLE chicken any time. Gross!)

Things to accomplish today:

Bake gingerbread girls and boys.
Cut Beth's fringe.
Take Beth for her last swimming lesson of the year.

We actually ticked them all off!

At Safeway, we found writing icing that came in a convenient pack of four colours. Of course, Beth chose to use all the colours on her creations. At Beth's insistence, I tried my hand at icing, but my gingerbread boy came out with a wobbly grin.

The fringe came out crooked, in spite of many attempts to fix it. Don't you just wish kids would sit still when they need to!

The Leisure Centre pools were packed. The school hols have begun in earnest, and everywhere there were hordes of school kids splashing around and screaming like they had so much to ventilate, anxious parents surveying the masses of moving bodies to see that they still had their kids in sight, instructors vainly attempting to make themselves heard above the din...

From my vantage point, I could make out David (Beth's instructor) holding out a hoop and Beth doing a funny twist as she swam through confidently. It's beautiful seeing her enjoy swimmming and doing so well that her instructor asks another student to copy what Beth has just done.

Who would've known the terrified toddler who wouldn't put a toe in the waters off Gold Coast 6 years ago would grow to become a water baby?

Corner Block: To Live Or Not To Live (On One)

2009-12-04T16:46:00.002+11:00

My aunt who's visiting from Sg just gave me her take on why not to live on a corner block.

"When it's windy, your house gets very cold because the wind can come in from any direction. Plus, you have a huge backyard with few trees to screen out the wind. If there are houses on either side of you, the wind comes in from only the front or back. Your house stays warm."

She was comparing the livability of my place with my cousin's. She considers my house cold (notwithstanding the recent insulation job) and my cousin's two-storey townhouse nice and warm as it's sheltered on both sides by houses and there are mature trees in the backyard.

Just another of those things we learn only from experience...

For The Longest Time

2009-12-03T17:21:00.003+11:00

This has to be the longest week EVER.

I've just survived - barely - a week without the Internet.

Couldn't access email.

Couldn't surf.

Couldn't do i-banking.

I gave up on Tue and paid $2 at the local library for 30 min of email access.

We switched from Optus to iprimus last Tue and I'd naively thought the transition would happen in no time at all.

But I didn't know I needed an iprimus modem to get online; in my ignorance, I didn't think to ask the customer service folks when I finally managed to get through to a human.

They were very professional and courteous, but the subject of did-I-have-an-iprimus-modem as opposed to did-I-have-my-own-modem (which I do, two in fact) never came up.

So it wasn't till very late, after they'd sent me the welcome CD with the terms of service etc etc, that I made the connection between my broadband-less woe and the missing modem.

But all that's forgotten.

My modem arrived this afternoon. The courier guy had a bemused look when I opened the door; I guess my bedhead and spaced-out expression made it obvious what I'd been doing just before he rang the bell.

I'm never the most tech-inclined person, but today, I persisted in opening up the box, reading and re-reading the instructions, popping in the installation CD, following the online prompts and even - amazing! - troubleshooting by instinct when the green light on the DSL port didn't come on after the one-minute waiting time.

It took 20 mins, but by golly, I've done it, and I'm online AGAIN. So proud of me. :-)

How to Find the Best Businesses - and Avoid the Worst

2009-11-24T13:36:00.003+11:00

Don't we all want a reliable tradie or builder or a hairdresser who really listens?

I just discovered this fantastic site (Word of Mouth on the Web) that lets users post reviews of their experiences and rate a business.

A great help for busy people!

Overheard At The Gym...

2009-11-11T14:23:00.001+11:00

Lady1: "I can't wear shorts. My legs are hairy."

Lady2 (wearing shorts): "Mine are old. Old legs."

Dog Grooming for Mini Schnauzers

2009-11-07T15:20:00.005+11:00

Once or twice a year, and especially when it gets really hot, CA takes out the grooming kit and gives Scottie a makeover.

Last Sat, he spent THREE hours trimming Scottie and transforming him into the handsome dog that he is inside.

Check out the before and after pics.

Accidentally On Purpose

2009-11-07T15:13:00.007+11:00

Over the Melbourne Cup holiday, we planned to drive to Torquay.

We ended up in Avalon Beach after missing the turning to the Surf Coast Highway. As the Chief Navigator and guardian of the Melway, I still don't understand how it happened!

The good thing is, we live in VIC, where you can drive in any direction for 30 min and discover some place new and interesting.

A euphemistic way of saying - "Ok, so we're lost. Where do we go now?"

That's how we stumbled on a little sign saying Avalon Beach Road and found ourselves here on a deserted windswept jetty. There's a row of old houses nearby, but not much else.

The man and the dog explored, the girls complained that it was too cold and windy - and stayed in the car.

Dinner @ Sofia's

2009-10-26T17:39:00.007+11:00

Sofia's @ Camberwell (857 Burke Road) is THE place to go if you have a large group of hungry people to feed.

Zhao'en had warned us about the huge portions, but really!

Here's what 7 of us shared -

One pasta (3-in-1: seafood, spag bol; carbonara)
One calamari entree
One chicken hawaiian pizza
One slice of blackforest cake
One massive ice cream: multiple scoops wobbling in one tiny cup (sorry, we didn't take a pic of this one)

Guess which was Beth's favourite? :-)

What Weekends Are For

2009-10-24T11:45:00.003+11:00

Today's going to be a great day.

Beth and CA are off to Family Fun Day at Heathdale Christian College. She's been looking forward to it for months, and begged us to get her the $25 wristband that lets her go for unlimited rides. That, and to please let her skip Chinese class because after all, FFD is only once in two years whereas Chinese class is every week.

You can't fault her logic. :-p

This afternoon, we're having a visit from our NZ friends Janelle and Mark. Then, a nice dinner in the City with another Sg friend, Zhao'en.

It's going to be a lovely Global Singaporeans gathering! :-)

How To Pay Less For Energy Use

2009-10-17T11:44:00.004+11:00

After the initial excitement about HRV, we've decided to pass on the offer for 2 reasons:

* hubby doesn't think there's any room in the roof after The Insulation Job
* it makes more sense to install HRV in a new house

I was going through our gas and electricity bills this week and decided we're paying too much.

There's gotta be an objective way to do comparisons without the pressure from eager telemarketers and doorknockers.

Here are 2 links I've found:

ShopAround.com.au

Pros: Great website. Easy to use. It's best that you have four bills (one for each season) handy for the most accurate recommendation.
In my case, they recommended that I switch to Red Energy.
Cons: The site is relatively new and they have just four suppliers to choose from: Actew AGL, Click Energy, Country Energy and Red Energy.

ChoiceSwitch.com.au

This is an affiliated site to Choice, the consumer awareness and action site.

Pros: Great website. Easy to use. You need just one bill at hand. Because Choice is more established, they have a larger list of suppliers on their panel.
I received a list of 20 energy plans to consider, with estimated savings in the first year ranging from $1.29 right up to $359.28.

Cons: Nothing yet.

How To Reduce Your Home Heating And Cooling Costs

2009-10-13T12:44:00.003+11:00

I just spent a whole HOUR with a salesperson.

I am normally leery of telemarketers and door-knockers. When I get cornered into a conversation with one, I find myself chafing and wondering how to get away without being rude. Those that read from canned scripts and won't pause to let you get a word in are the worst. Next to those who pretend not to understand the meaning of "I'm really busy right now".

With those companies that play the green washing game, it's worse. They're always trying to convince you that if you switch from your current utilities provider to theirs, you'll get an x% discount on your bill.

After a while, it can get pretty confusing, and I'm sure that's the caller's intention. I mean, unless you have your bill handy, how many of us know how much we pay per MJ of gas consumed, how much is the service charge, freedom discount etc, and what all the info means?

The conversation with Nick from HRV was different though.

He was here to talk about how I could:

save at least 50% on our gas bills by capturing some of the free heat that's trapped in the roof cavity and using it to keep our home at a comfortable and steady temperature throughout the year, esp in winter
reduce moisture from condensation and keep my house low-maintenance for longer
improve the quality of the indoor air supply so I can have a healthier home

Energy saving is a very relevant consideration here because energy costs are rising all the time and VIC is still suffering from drought, which makes water a precious (and expensive) resource.

Being at the mercy of energy providers by continuing to live the way we do is simply not sustainable in the long term.

Nick walked around our place with a thermal scanner and showed me how the temperature in different parts of our house varied. Our home is not exactly 5-star energy efficient, and there are many days when it actually feels cold indoors even though it's nice and sunny outside.

When he lifted the manhole cover with a broomstick and pointed the scanner at the ceiling, the temperature was an astonishing 27.5 deg, a whole 10 deg warmer than the indoor (ambient) temperature.

And this was an overcast day.

How the HRV system works is this (you can also watch the video):

In winter, it draws the heat from the sun, filters the heated air to remove most of the dust mites and other particles that cause allergies and asthma, and pushes the filtered air downwards along the walls and floor and distributes it evenly around the house. It even improves the heat retention capability of the house by keeping the walls and floor warm, so that you wake up the next morning to a nice cosy home.

The HRV system costs $0.10 a day to run, uses the equivalent of 75W and will pay for itself in 3-5 years.

What HRV does is send someone over to install a little 30x50 cm ventilation unit in the roof apex where it's warmest, which takes half a day, and then depending on the size of your home and the number of living areas, a number of outlets are installed in the ceilings of your living areas.

We were given a quote for a 2-fan system with 8 outlets at a cost that works out to about $12 a day over a one-year period. The system has been certified independently by GECA and Nick was able to provide plenty of testimonials and even utilities bills from happy customers showing the savings gained.

Now to explain all this to hubby...

Aus Govt Raises Interest Rates

2009-10-07T20:32:00.003+11:00

The good times are over. For home owners anyway.

After months of falling interest rates, the Aus Govt has reversed its policy and raised the central bank's cash rate by 25 points to 3.25%.

This is the first hike in interest rates since March 2008.

This works out to about $40 a month extra on a home loan of $300,000.

Aus is apparently the first developed country to go against the trend of rate cuts which most countries have adopted in response to the GFC.

I'm waiting for a letter any day now to tell me our minimum payment has gone up. But it won't matter in real terms, since our plan is to continue paying extra into our mortgage whenever we can.

Takeaway Homes

2009-10-07T20:26:00.002+11:00

Domain.com carried an article this week about builders outsourcing the construction of high-rise apartments and even an entire project overseas (guess which Asian country?).

The concept has never been used in the context of high-rise housing and already there are rumblings about quality control and the integrity of the product.

The project in question is waiting on Council approval and has so far attracted 90 objections.

Daylight Savings - The Third Year

2009-10-05T15:15:00.002+11:00

I think I've finally got it figured out.

Daylight Savings means I lose an hour.

So when I put the clock forward from 2 pm to 3 pm, I have lost time because it is now officially 3 pm when it should really be 2 pm.

That explains why in summer, the sky is still bright at 9 pm. It's actually 8 pm!

Why do humans create these artificial methods of confusing ourselves?

It's like the tech revolution. We make more gadgets and then have to buy the accessories to go with them, and all of them take money out of our pockets. First there's Wii, then there's Wii Fit. Why play Wii tennis when you can (or should) be playing real tennis outdoors?

Not that I would either way of course. So perhaps Wii Fit is for the couch potatoes and occasional gym goers. Like moi.

Hello & Goodbye

2009-10-02T15:47:00.005+10:00

We've just farewelled our house guests at the Gull bus stop @ Kelly Park/Werribee RSL. Shirlynn and SG arrived last Sat and stayed for six days.

As I write, they are on the bus to the airport. By midnight, they'll be back in warm, humid Sg. By Monday, they will be back at their desks working as hard as every other Singaporean.

After nearly a week under one roof, being a household of six felt natural, almost as if this is how it's been for a long time.

Each morning, we would breakfast together before Shirlynn and SG went off in their hired car for a day trip to one of VIC's tourist attractions. In the evening, they would display (and sometimes share) their purchases, we might open a bottle of dessert wine or whatever wine connoisseur SG had bought, and we would enjoy hearing all about their day.

There is something about opening your home that makes for especially deep and intimate bonds.

You get to know each other's likes (Nescafe cappucino with a shot of milk here, "teh si siu dai" in Sg) and habits (taking pics at every photo opp). You get to see yourself through another's eyes. The dynamics of relationships shift slightly as everyone adjusts to a new context and environment.

The girls, esp Jordanne, benefited from having new adults around. It's nice for them to be with different people... and a good break for Mommy!

Aside from being spoiled rotten with sweet treats, having someone different to play peekaboo and watch Pete's A Pizza with, they got to practise their manners and be a part of the joy of having stayover guests. I hope this imprints positively on them as they grow up.

As I am continually finding, I enjoy my home and possessions better when I have friends to share them with. It's like, we've been so blessed with our cosy cottage and lovely local community, and hosting visiting friends seems like a great way to give back and share what we've received. Having the occasional visitor and house guest makes life more interesting, colourful and fuller.

Thank God for the gift of friends.

But even knowing that one grows from embracing the bitter with the sweet, and even remembering what Gandalf counselled at the final parting by the Sea ("I will not say do not weep, for not all tears are an evil"), it was hard to say goodbye. Hard to articulate all the thoughts, prayers and blessings in my head.

All I could do was hug Shirlynn many times over, and cry silent tears as I drove home. The car felt different - lonely, somehow - with just the kids in the back seat instead of our friends in the front and me in the back with the girls.

So brutally back-to-usual.

Beth was lovely. As I sat at the wheel in our carport trying to compose myself, she leaned over and hugged me long and hard.

"Which side of the chest is the heart?" she asked as she handed me a tissue.

I said the left, and she gently patted me there.

How blessed I am to be the mother of my girls...

Growing In Hospitality

2009-09-29T17:07:00.003+10:00

I was just remarking to my cousin last night that I'm becoming more like her mum. I find I am enjoying having a full house: lots of people, lots of noise, different dynamics.

Several times a year, we have friends and relatives from SG drop by to visit. What's really interesting is observing myself as an introvert managing the adjustment to sharing our home with people who may be with us for as little as a week or as long as a month.

Part of me enjoys solitude and craves a private space in which to think and write.

But with the passage of the years, another side of me (the "auntie"?) has started to blossom. This alter ego actually revels in having 'new' faces in my home and the opportunity to open my home to them. I like being able to show my SG friends around the neighbourhood, introducing them to my local friends, explaining how things work around here as compared to in SG, planning meals and arranging bedlinen and personal supplies.

It's really helped me grow as a person. And it's great for the kids to meet new people and be exposed to different ways of living and doing things.

Yamaha Or Private Tuition

2009-09-16T09:13:00.010+10:00

After Sunday's Yamaha concert, I've pretty much decided what our strategy for Beth's musical learning will be.

But first, here's a clip of how her class performance went...

When we compared the performance of her class with some of the other classes of similar level, it was clear that Beth's class was a standout. The kids were perfectly disciplined, orderly, and in sync with their teacher. All that weekly training ("eyes watching me") in watching the teacher, following cues and rehearsing for the concert paid off beautifully.

I must make special mention of Beth's teacher Rebecca Stewart. She has an absolutely natural connection with kids, and works hard to keep these 6-7 y.o.s entertained, motivated and open to learn each week. She manages to correct without coming on too hard on the little ones, and is not beneath making fun of herself when she makes the rare mistake while playing.

It's amazing just to watch her sing and play (without looking at the keyboard!) and engage the kids with a variety of humorous and dramatic facial expressions and comments.

Actually, it's exhausting. I feel tired just imagining myself doing what she does for a whole hour.

But back to the concert...

Having sat through countless practices of the piece (and being a perfectionist), I was straining to catch any mis-steps (which would be natural given performance nerves and the average age of the performers), but there were none. The performance of March of the Little Bears (which included a tricky transposition from F major to C major and back to F major) was flawless.

We were also given a glimpse of the musical possibilities post-Yamaha. This group of teens you're about to watch have completed the Yamaha course but wanted to continue, so a special class was created for them. Here they're playing the Tokyo Disneyland theme song with their teacher Keiko.

That guy in the middle who gave the countdown to each major section. Can you see how his whole body was just moving with the music, like he couldn't help himself? So cool. I must learn from him how to be less inhibited the next time I play in front of an audience.

The whole time they were playing, I felt like dancing. When the item ended four and a half minutes later, I cheered and clapped and whooped...and wished there was someone I could share my euphoria with. It was so beautiful to sit there watching these young people put their God-given talents to work for a good cause.

So. About our strategy for the next two years...

We've decided, in close consultation with the person who will be affected by the decision, that Beth will continue for another two years with Yamaha. She has an assessment coming up at the end of the year where she will play two pieces of her choice (she has already decided what those pieces will be). The assessing teacher(s) will - I believe - also test her on her oral/aural skills.

That would be the perfect time to discuss how she's doing and to hear what her teacher recommends.

Also, in term 4, I will request an interview with her school music teacher to hear her recommendations. She gets to observe Beth in a different setting every Monday, and should have something interesting and useful to share.

My own instincts tell me Beth is an above-average but not outstanding musician. She has the ability but not always the attitude to support it. Until she wants to excel for her own sake, I'm going to try and resist the urge to push her through the grades.

I know she will benefit from one-on-one tuition and that the earlier she starts, the quicker she'll catch up to her peers who are already having private lessons. But for now, she's enjoying playing in an ensemble, so I think I should, as a wise friend says, let her interest lead. We can always do both if she really wants to go further. It doesn't have to be an either/or decision.