Memoirs of a Mommy

A Very Merry Un-Birthday

2011-04-07T20:14:00.000-06:00

To Me!!

I was born at 7 minutes to 11 on Christmas morning. I swear I was. The fact that my most favorite treat ever is a coke Slurpee found only at 7-11 is not lost on me. I'm the oldest of 5 kids and was my parents joint Christmas gift on the first Christmas they were married.

When I turned one they realized how royally jack-up my birthday was bound to be as I got older and never truly got to have my own special day. So instead of celebrating my 1st birthday, they waited. Beginning that very first year, I celebrated my birthday on April 6th. In what can only be considered Divine Inspiration, my parents decided that since we celebrate Jesus' birth on Christmas that I could celebrate mine on what is truly his birthday, April 6th.

I LOVE it! I love that on my "real" birthday I get to be with my family and have yummy food and now that I'm older I get to watch my kids experience the "Christmas Magic". It's always a wonderful day. Then, a few months later, I get to have my own special day and do fun things all over again. It's a total win-win.

This is all I've known. I've never NOT celebrated my birthday on April 6th. To me, it's as much my birthday as the day I was born. So it's always really bugged me when my friends (or usually the guy I was dating) would say "I'm not celebrating your birthday because it's not really your birthday." Then Christmas time would come around and it was always "I'm not celebrating your birthday because you celebrate it in April." The meanies. Most of the time, though, I was spoiled on both my birthdays.

Since I never expected much for my birthday on Christmas, I was always so incredibly touched (beyond what words can even describe now) that my Grandma Brown would always give me a special birthday gift AND a Christmas gift in addition to whatever she gave me in April. It wasn't much, usually a book, but it told me that no matter what, she remembered me and I was important. (But that was a common thing when it came to my Grandma Brown. She always made you feel like her favorite.) My brother and sisters would also wake me up every Christmas morning by coming into my room and singing Happy Birthday to me. That was all the recognition my birthday ever got on Christmas but it was always enough.

At our family Christmas party, the year I turned 16, my parents brought out a decorated birthday cake for dessert. Everyone sang Happy Birthday to me and I was so surprised and touched that I cried.

Those things aside, if I didn't celebrate my birthday in April, I really wouldn't get to have a traditional birthday experience. So, especially as a kid, I've always loved celebrating my birthday at a different time. Growing up, it usually meant that I got to go shopping with my mom then we got to go out to dinner. When we all got older, we started gathering in the immediate family and all meeting up for our Birthday Dinner.

This year has been no different. Yesterday was April 6th and my birthday has been wonderful!

First, Shane and I both took the week off from work. Not to celebrate my birthday but just to have a break. This alone was a gift. It's been so nice to slow down the pace and feel a bit rested and not so stressed out all the time. (Although, the thought of my inbox come Monday morning is starting to get to me. I'm going to pay for the PTO, I'm sure.)

Second, Shane has gone out of his way to make me feel special. He brought me lunch, gave me red roses (I never get flowers.. ever), a coke Slurpee, and a Flip HD Video Camera! Uhm, hello. My name is SPOILED!

Third, we got to go out to eat with my parents and my sisters which is always a good time.

Fourth, Lilly gave me a very thoughtful gift. She knew I had lost my ring (my wedding ring replacement since the original doesn't fit) so she found one of her rings and put it in a box and wrapped it up and gave it to me. So sweet and thoughtful. I love that girl!

Fifth, Shane is taking me out on a secret special date-night tomorrow. My parents offered to watch the kids (since they are the only ones I can leave Allie with at this age) so Shane is taking me out. BUT- I have no idea what we are doing. He won't tell me. Which is very different than in years past. I'm sure we'll do dinner and a movie but where we go will be a surprise. It's fun having something surprising to look forward to.

All-in-all... it has been a fabulous week. My family has made me feel special and loved. It was just what this tired, over-worked mommy's heart needed. So, I've gotta tell you... having two birthdays really is the only way to go. You might want to try it sometime.

Crystal
Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

Don't Try This At Home

2011-03-07T22:25:00.001-07:00

I've never had chicken fried steak before.

Is that weird?

Well, it sounded kinda good so I gave it a try. Cooked it up and sat the famile down to eat. And it wasn't so good. Shane loved it. Having served his mission in the South he likes fried food (is chicken fried steak even a southern dish??) And he gobbled it up gravy and all. And the gravy was the worst part! Ugh! It was so foul.

Shane is a fairly picky eater so I think its safe to assume that there wasn't anything wrong with my attempt at CFS for dinner. The problem is entirely with me. I couldn't stand the texture. Now that I'm thinking about it I am much more of a fan of breadcrumb or panko fried items vs flour fried.

Either way, I don't think I'll be cooking that again anytime soon. The thought alone makes me feel quesey (did I spell that right?). But hey, at least it was gross enough to kill my appetite so I didn't starve when I didn't eat my dinner.

I Could Really Go For A Coke Slurpee

2011-03-07T22:16:00.001-07:00

But I won't have one. I've been off caffine since last September in preparation for nursing Allie. Since I'm still pumping there won't be any hard stuff for me. I even looked up the caffine content of a slurpee online just to make sure I wasn't avoiding it needlessly.

But I seems to have an added benefit that I wasn't anticipating... weight loss. My entire pregnancy I gained 6 lbs. Pretty good considering Alice weighed just over 6lbs. At my 6 week follow-up appointment I was 20lbs under my starting weight. And it keeps coming off.

So while I may be so insanely tired I almost fall asleep standing up... it almost seems like a fair trade.

Yawn!

2011-03-05T10:32:00.001-07:00

Allie is almost 4 months old and while it pains me to see her getting so big (its no secret that I love babies) I had hoped the trade off would be more sleep.

Lilly was such a difficult baby. Her horrible reflux and constant UTI's made her cry and scream all the time. And yet even she slept through the night by 15 weeks.

This little punk isn't having it. And it's not because she isn't a good sleeper, she is. The problem is she's hungry. One look at her thighs (that have more rolls than a cinnabun and man are they cute) and you know she isn't starving. But she wakes up just long enough to eat and falls right back asleep.

At first she was making progress. Bedtime with one last bottle at 7pm. I would feed her one more time before I went to bed about 10:30pm and then she wouldn't wake up till 4am. She would quickly eat and go back to sleep until 830am. It worked! I was anticipating dropping the late night feeding soon and then move on to dropping the 4am one after that.

Alice, however is not hving it. About a month ago she stopped stretching the time between meals during the night and now eats every 3 hrs, day and night.

I guess I could let her cry it out but since it doesn't seem lik a habbit I'm hesitant to try. If she truly is hungry momma is going to feed her. Since I pump breast milk and give it to her in bottles I wondered if givng her some formula at night would help. I hear it takes longer to digest formula so I mixed half and half... didn't help. I tried adding some rice cereal... didn't help.

And while there is no question I will take this little munchkin any way I can get her (have I mentioned how utterly in love with her I am?) I must say I miss the zzzzz's.

I'm Never Going To Catch Up

2011-03-05T00:35:00.001-07:00

Several things have contributed to my sparse blog posting. Two of them happened about the same time. I changed my blog template - went a more professional/less personal route and I got a new phone. I used to blog from my phone all the time. It was so easy to type up something quick wherever I was. But when I switched it became impossible to type almost anything and the less personal template of my own blog added to my lack of interest.

There is much more to it. Sometimes I pull into myself and don't have much to say that I want others to hear. This was one of those times. I'm still there. If my blog was private for just me to read I would probably post more but if that's really what I wanted I could just open a word doc or better yet, get a piece of paper and a pen.

Since I still love my blog (it's about as creative as I get so it feels like a piece of art to me) I'm going to try much harder to post more. There are two things that I think will help with that. First, I changed my template. A personalized header is still missing but when time permits I will get one made. At least now its not a cookie cutter code. I picked the colors and the layout and that's enough to make it feel like mine again. Second, I got a new phone. One that should make mobile blogging much easier. In fact, I'm typing this up on my phone right now. Very cool actually.

I may or may not share the many opinions I have on a wide range of topics. I've become a bit more personal with my opinions as I've gotten older. But you will see more journaling and family stories as this is the stuff I want to remember. This is my golden time. When my kids are young and I'm still finding my way. Hopefully by writing down my experiences I can teach myself a thing or two when I come back and reread my memories. I hope you'll stick around for the journey.

And I definitely hope the next post will be in the very near future.

Welcome Baby Alice!

2010-12-16T23:03:00.000-07:00

Welcome

Alice Mckell Martin

Born November 11, 2010

6 lbs 13 oz

19 inches long

She's finally here! Baby Alice has already woven her way into our hearts and made a place for herself in our family. She's 5 weeks now. Obviously I'm a little behind (this blog being one of many things). But the past 5 weeks, while tiring, have been wonderful. Here's the story how Allie made her way into the world...

While I was due on the 15th, my Doctor and I decided that I would be induced early to make sure Baby Allie was monitored during the entire course of labor. One of the reasons I believe Noah survived birth was because his distress was caught early. I didn't want to go into labor and have her be in trouble before I even got to the hospital. Just a precaution to help ease my worried heart.

Shane and I went to the hospital early Thursday morning and quickly got checked in. by 8:30am I was on the pitocin and things were rolling. I was very lucky to get a FABULOUS nurse. While chatting, I mentioned that I didn't think this would take long seeing as I was only in labor for 4 hours with Noah. I was very happy when she rushed my order for the Epi. Unfortunately the first Epi didn't work. Not one little bit. It was quite the bummer but it happens... although they said it very rarely happens. Typical, right? While waiting for it to work, I wasn't allowed to get up but I had to pee so very badly. It made every single contraction so much worse than it needed to be. I was just trying to hard not to pee my pants. Once they pulled the bad Epi out and did it again, I was numb within minutes and I was able to get the much needed cath. Let's just say I was NOT dehydrated.

After that I rolled on my side and things went fast. I think I went from a 3 to a 10 in 15 minutes. I had a little O2 to help the little one. She was fine it was just the dips in her heart rate from the pressure of the contractions. My nurse asked me if I felt any pressure yet and I said no but then the very next contraction it was there... and it was time.

I pushed for 3 minutes... it only took that long because I took a break after the second push. For some reason, hormones... endorphins... I don't know exactly, but I get kinda loopy and drugged when pushing time comes. It's happened every time. I get sorta tired and drugged. It's weird. That's why I took a break but after 4 total pushes Baby Allie was here.

Alice was born at 2:23pm on Thursday November 11th, 2010 after only 6 hours of labor. She weighed 6 pounds 13 ounces and was 19 inches long. The first thing I noticed about her was her dark hair. Not only did she have hair, it was dark! Absolutely beautiful. And her chubby cheeks... can't forget those either.

After she was born, they put her on my chest. I held her and loved her and she hasn't left my side since. Very much a completely different experience than I've had before. She was healthy and I was grateful. Her APGAR scores were an 8 and a 9. Unbelievable!

I got to see Shane give her her first bath... in my room! When they took her for her hearing test, I went too. She passed.

Before we went home she had an Echo of her heart just to make sure everything was okay. It looked great. Not even 24 hrs old and her PDA was already closed. She did have a PFO (hole between the left and right sides) but this is common and it will most likely close too.

Since she was doing so well and I felt great, I checked out of the hospital early and headed home. I was eager to see my other babies and it would be easier to be able to get my own food and meds without having to wait on busy nurses. All told, we spent about 26 hrs in the hospital. Pretty cool... very cool actually. Sure beats months and months like before.

When we got home, the first thing Lilly asked was to hold her new baby sister. It was so sweet seeing her hold Allie. My two little girls... this Momma's heart was full.

In the past 5 weeks, Allie has been a super baby. The Lord knew I needed an easy baby because I sure got one. She never cries. Just the occasional yelp to remind me she wants to be held. And she does love to be held. But I don't mind one bit. My arms ached to hold Baby Noah... holding Allie has been nothing but a pleasure. And kissing her chubby cheeks and breathing in her soft breath... can you tell I am absolutely in love with this little being?

So far, her hair hasn't fallen out and I'm so glad because look at it? I LOVE it. Lilly was bald until she was 3. Noah has always had is crazy blonde hair. This dark cashmere hair is beyond precious.

Getting up at night isn't as hard as I remember it being the first time around. I am tired and I've fallen asleep on the couch more times than I can count but I don't feel so insanely tired like I did before. I don't seem to get anything done though. Just as I get one thing on the list crossed off another gets added. Showers are few in number too but I know all this will change and change way too quickly. I'm loving her being little regardless of how stinky I might be. I'll have time to shower later.

Last February, after my ruptured ectopic, I was afraid I would have any even harder time conceiving than I usually do. There were no words to describe my surprise to find out I was pregnant again only 2 weeks later. The entire pregnancy I felt great; better than I had in years. And now, here she is. I'm the momma of three now. I have no doubt that she was meant to be here and I am already grateful for what she has given me. Just like Lilly and Noah are my miracle babies, Lilly after struggling with infertility and Noah after needing a heart transplant to live, Allie is my miracle because she came when she was suppose to against all odds and in the process she healed me. Healed me in more ways than I can even begin to tell.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

Week 34 and Counting

2010-10-08T17:56:00.000-06:00

This week's NST went well. As much as driving 30-50 minutes twice a week to get up there really sucks (especially at 9am) I am glad that I have these scheduled regularly. While I won't feel less worried about her heart until after she is born and has an echo, it does help ease my worry about how she is doing now.

I had my Doctor appointment this morning and that went well too. My Dr is truly fabulous. He always does his best to reassure me that they will do everything to make sure this baby is healthy. My last ultrasound looked better than the one before. She isn't measuring small anymore. Well, I guess her femur is in the 44th percentile but that's not a big deal. Over all she measures at 49%. So right where she should. I am measuring at 33 weeks (which doesn't surprise me because I still suspect my due date is the 20th and not the 15th) but that isn't a big deal either. The plan is still to make it any time after Halloween (but I'm thinking now that 11/11 would be a fun bithday - if I can make it that long).

The only issue now is that my blood pressure has started to creep up. It's not horrible yet but it's inching its way up there even with the blood pressure medication I've been on. So I'm now on "preeclampsia watch". I'm really not too worried about it though. When I had preeclampsia with Lilly, I swelled like a balloon early on, I always had upper stomach pain (liver area), and eventually developed the headache that wouldn't go away. I was induced with her at 37 weeks. This time around, I've managed my weight gain awesomely (the only weight I've gained is how much they say the baby weighs right now), my fingers aren't swollen at all - in fact, they are smaller now than they were before I got pregnant. AWESOME! (As long as my ring stops falling off without me knowing it.) Other than a few pain incidents that hasn't been a factor either. And no headaches to report so far. I know things can change quickly the closer I get but I think it will be alright.

I have gotten to that point now though when I'm seriously ready to not be pregnant anymore. I'm slowing down more and more everyday. A short trip to Walmart yesterday nearly resulted in my death. At least that's how it felt the rest of the night as my hips and back screamed in agony. Sleep is hard to come by... in fact, so are deep breaths. I've done better this time around than the previous two (which I am more grateful for than you could ever know) but my patience is starting to wear thin. I'm definitely counting the days. Which is only going to make it drag on slower and slower, I know.

The house reorganization is coming along thanks to my insanely handsome and muscular husband. He has cleaned out and reorganized our storage cellar, the food storage pantry, the office/dumping ground, the toy room, and the family room. Now we just have to switch Lilly to her new room, move a few more items of furniture, and get the baby room/crib set up. At the moment you can still barely get in my front door since I have no other place to store baby gear until a room frees up but that's all good. I'm just beyond thankful that I kept all the baby gear so now I don't have to figure out a way to pay for it all.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

Lilly and Reading

2010-09-30T15:53:00.000-06:00

Intriguing titles just aren't my strong point at the moment. Sorry.

Lilly has never been interested in reading. I know many kids who beg their mom's for one more story and one more book but Lilly never has. She loves to tell made up stories and always wants us to tell her one before bed but she has never been able to sit still and pay attention to books.

Once she got her new glasses and then started Kindergarten, where daily reading is homework, I've been insisting on reading books every day with her. Much to my surprise, she likes it! She picks out at least 3 books every day (many of which were mine when I was her age) and we sit down and read. Sometimes I just read the stories to her. Other times we practice sight words and I pause at words and make her help me sound them out. She gets really frustrated when I do this but is willing to humor me just to keep reading.

A couple weeks ago I received an email from an author who has a new book out wanting to know if I would be willing to review it. Since we are reading the same books over and over again I gladly accepted. It's always nice to have some new reading material and it looked like a fun story.

I received a copy of Checking up on Daddy by Adam J. Roth and busted it out before we even got home that day. While waiting in the car for Noah's speech therapy I read both kids the book about one family's ritual when Daddy gets home from work each night. They both loved it. I think they could really relate to a story about Daddy coming home from work since that is their favorite time of day. We ended up reading it three times that afternoon.

I think it's fun to find new stories to read to the kids. I have always been a HUGE reader and I still remember my mom reading me book after book before I learned to read on my own. I hope I can help Lilly and Noah develop a love of books too.

And I want to send a thank you out to Adam for sending me a copy of his book. It's sure to become a classic in my family.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

A Quick Catch Up

2010-09-29T21:13:00.000-06:00

I had my first NST (Non-Stress Test) of this pregnancy this morning. While I had to wait over 45 minutes to be seen, the end result was pleasing. So far everything looks good. I have another Ultrasound Friday morning but my blood pressures are looking good and I'm managing my blood sugar too. If I make it to 38 weeks (because I seriously doubt getting any further than that) then I only have 4 1/2 more weeks to go. Any time after Halloween and I will be good and ready.

I've had some recent changes at work. Something that could have been serious (and most likely caused by someone just trying to cause problems) turned out to be a huge blessing. I've been put back at full-time and while it means twice as much on my already plentiful plate, I couldn't be more grateful for it. Christmas (and monthly bills) don't seem quite so overwhelming anymore. Maybe we'll be able to give the Ramen Noodles and Macaroni and Cheese a much welcome break. The baby definitely makes this change a bit harder but it will all work out. I'm determined to work hard and make my position irreplaceable to as many people as possible. Since the baby is coming right at the start of my busiest time of year, it would be a very risky decision to take any time off. My company does offer Short Term Disability and then FMLA after having a baby, it wouldn't do me any good to go MIA right when every needs me then come back just in time for my slowest time of the year. That would be a really good way of securing me a spot on the next lay-off list. What I've decided to do is get as much work done ahead of time as I can then take about a week off right after the baby is born. Then I'll go back to work (well, work from home. I don't have to leave my kids or go into an office... or even get dressed) and be super helpful during the holiday rush. Then when my slow time comes I'll catch up on my sleep. It's not the best of situations, I know. But it's a sacrifice that I am willing and happy to make. I need to make my job as secure as possible. Plus, I have a fabulous husband who doesn't make me do any of it alone.

Speaking of fabulous husbands... I really do have one. Last weekend we celebrated our 8th anniversary. And I can honestly say I love that man more today than the day I married him. Not only do I love him for just being him and all of the unique things that makes him who he is, I also love him because he is an honorable man. He is faithful and honors his Priesthood. He serves others. He works hard and sacrifices for me and our family. He plays with our kids and teaches them and makes them feel loved and special. He is constantly working on bettering himself, physically, mentally, spiritually.... he gives way more than he receives. I don't know how I got so lucky. But when I think about how he is mine forever I feel such overwhelming joy.

Lilly is liking school. At first she wasn't too keen on the idea but she has since warmed up to it and made some friends. She is wearing her new glasses every day and even likes reading time with Mom (which we do every night). She is also enjoying having her neighbor friend over after school (I pick her up from school and watch her for a couple hours every day to earn some extra money) to play with.

Noah is liking school more and more and I have high hopes he may actually end up enjoying it and maybe even learning a thing or two. (I just posted a big "All things Noah" update over at Noah's Adventure if your interested.)

The next few weeks are going to include lots of packing, cleaning, organizing and room relocation in our house as we prepare for Baby Alie's arrival. The mess is already in full force. And now I'm off to watch some Criminal Minds with my fantastic hubby who finally got home from work. I have no idea if any of this made sense or was even coherant but I'm not taking the time to proof read. Sorry. :)

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

The Beginning of the End

2010-08-31T09:12:00.000-06:00

My heart is gone. It's left me and gone to school.

Yesterday marked the beginning of the end. My oldest, Ms. Princess Lilly, started Kindergarten. For the next 13 years she will leave me and go to school and before I know it she is going to be graduating and going off the college. And then she is going to get married and have babies.... but maybe I'll get lucky. She does tell me every day that she is NOT getting married ever because what if the boy wants her to live with him? She can't do that cause she wants to live me with forever. (Thank you my sweet girl.)

Lilly has been a bit nervous about starting Kindergarten. She didn't want to go to a new school with new friends and a new teacher. She wished she could go back to preschool to see Ms. Nicole and all her old friends. But when the day came, she was bursting with excitement. First thing in the morning, she came into my room, all smiles, "Mom, I know what today is... it's the first day of school!" She picked out her new outfit to wear and asked me to curl her hair. "Is it time yet? How much longer?"

Sweet Noah wasn't as excited. Maybe he didn't quite understand, it's hard to say. Either way, he knew something was up and it worried him. He woke up way too early so I sat with him all morning so he would go back to sleep and get some rest. All morning he acted concerned and nervous but when it came down to it, he was so brave.

I hate that his hair is so short and makes him look sick. I refuse to pay to get his hair cut anymore since it's such an awful experience for him and never turns out anyways. And since he was in desperate need, I decided to break out the clippers. I was already "invested" when I realized the clippers were in fact broken and I had to switch to Shane's which don't have any attachment. Hence, Noah's cancer boy hair cut. Good thing it grows back super fast.

Anyways, Monday morning, we got up and made bacon, eggs and pancakes. Took baths and showers, got ready for the day and headed off to school. It was so nice Shane had the day off and could be there with us for this memorable day.

We dropped off Noah first. He was so scared but was the bravest little man. A class aid came out and walked him in. He said good bye and took her hand. But then he had to stop and ask about Mom again.

Watching him walk off was SO heart wrenching for me. When we went to pick him up he seemed out of it and the first thing he said when he saw me was "Da?" I assured him that Dad was in the car and we left. As soon as he saw that Mom and Dad were there he perked up a little. But it took him a few hours to ease up and not be so anxious. His progress report says he got sleepy during snack time (which he wouldn't eat) so they laid him on a bean bag and he took a nap. Just shows how nervous he was. This kid never sleeps, let alone nap, and he ended up sleeping through the first day of school.

Next up it was Lilly's turn. We headed off to Kindergarten (she goes to a different elementary school than Noah but it's real close). There is about a half hour between Noah's drop off and Lilly's so when we got there we went and played on the playground. It was during an older classes recess so she headed off alone while Shane and I stood off to the side watching. She was nervous and slow to join in. Watching her be so self conscious and cautious felt like a knife to my heart. I never want her to feel that way. It made me want to scoop her up and take her back home. Shane echoed my feelings by saying that Homeschool had never looked so good. (I love that man!)

Luckily, when the other kids began to arrive, Lilly saw an old friend from her Preschool. Turns out Camryn is in her new class so she at least knew one person. She was SO excited. There is another Lilly in her class too (and according to Lilly she has the same hair as Camryn). These three girls grouped right up and boy, it did this Momma's heart good to see her with some friends.

Then it was time. Lilly lined up (again, acting nervous and unsure and I'm very proud of myself for not "rescuing" her from the big bad evil kindergarten), waved good bye, and walked through the doors into the rest of her life.

I know it's a bit melodramatic. I know there are parents out there who think over protective parents are doing their children a disservice. But I am not one of those people. I would keep my babies by my side and in my arms forever if it meant keeping them safe. If I could protect their little hearts from sadness or pain. I have a very hard time entrusting their care and safety to anyone else. When I became a mother, I found myself. My life had meaning and purpose and reason. I gladly sacrifice all that I am and have for these precious gifts. I really hope that the coming years are good to my babies. That they find joy and excitement in this new adventure. That they continue to develop talents and a sense of worth through their accomplishments. And I pray every day that Heavenly Father watches over them and keeps them safe for me.

After drop off, Shane and I found ourselves with 2 hours of alone time. So we ran some errands and enjoyed a non-interrupted conversation. It was actually quite nice. Since that's Shane's day off each week, I think I'm going to really like Mondays now.

We picked up Noah and headed back to get Lilly. Turns out she had a hard time with the scarf-belt and needed help getting it undone to go potty (thank goodness the Principal recognized her need and helped out). I have no idea how long she held it but I suspect it was a while because she asked me why Kindergarten was SO long. It made me feel so bad and guilty. I should have known better... what a rookie mistake. So I think she is going to have to save her belt for home-use for now.

That night we had pizza to celebrate their first day. We began our new at-home reading project and we played and enjoyed family time. It may be the beginning of the end but I plan on enjoying the journey every step of the way.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

Summer Fun

2010-07-12T14:39:00.000-06:00

*Because I am a craptastic blogger there will be no pictures in this post.

We have had so much fun this summer. It's nice to know that we are only half way through it. So even though I know I have already forgotten most of what we have done, I figured I would brain dump what I do remember before it goes too.

Lilly graduated Pre-School. It's sort of bitter sweet. It's fun to watch her grow up and get to experience new things. She really does get cuter and sweeter by the day. But it's hard for me to move on and let go. It has taken me the past 3 months to try and convince her that she will in fact love Kindergarten even though she will have a new teacher and make new friends.
Noah turned 3 in all his three year old glory ways. We celebrated with Family and then I took him and Lilly to the germ fest known as Chuck-E-Cheese to celebrate. He had a wonderful time.
We pack a picnic lunch and some blankets and traveled a couple hours down to Manti, Utah for the LDS Manti Pageant. It's a yearly tradition for my family ever since I was little. It's something we look forward to and love doing. We go a bit early and eat dinner then head over to the Temple grounds to get seats. Then when the sun goes down we watch the outdoor play about Joseph Smith and the Book of Mormon. It moves me every time. This year, and maybe it's due to all the pregnancy hormones, I did in fact get teary-eyed.
We've taken the kids to the local amusement park, Lagoon. We've floated down the lazy river, rode crazy rides (well the kids have, me and my baby belly don't get to do much) and got very hot and dirty.
Shane's family came to visit. We had a BBQ, visited and spent some well over due quality time chatting it up. (They live about 3 hours away but we don't see each other nearly enough)
I've had an ultrasound and a fetal echo to check on Baby Alice's development. She's doing good and yet I continue to freak out. She is making her presence known every day now with her kicks and summersaults. Shane has felt her move and even Lilly got to feel a kick or two.
The 4th of July (my favorite holiday) was awesome! We got up early and went to the parade. Lilly had a blast but it was too much noise and stimulation for Noah. He spent the entire time on my lap, hiding his eyes, and plugging his ears. Then we went swimming at my grandparents and had a family BBQ. It was fun to visit with everyone and the pool was super clean and the water perfect. Then we went to Fireworks. Unfortunately the family didn't get to be together and my parents didn't get to watch with us (they went with my Brother and his family) but two of my sisters came with us. We chatted and played around. Then when the fireworks started Noah got scared and spent the entire time plugging his ears and hiding under a blanket. Lilly made it about 1/2 way through before falling asleep. The next day we went to dinner at my parents and then set off our own fireworks. That was fun. Since they live up on the bench of the mountain we also got to watch all the fireworks across the valley. When we lit the plain little snakes on fire and it started to grow Lilly exclaimed, "Whoa! I didn't see that coming!"
We took the kids to see the Shrek movie that came out. It was cute and they had a great time.
We've played out in the sun; jumping on the tramp and splashing in the pool.
We went to a friends house to swim and had many play dates.
Shane ripped out the broken and unsafe hot tub that has been rotting in our deck since we moved in. Now we have a nice big ghetto hole.
Our car didn't pass emissions and it was a huge pain trying to get it fixed and registered.
Someone hacked my iTunes account (the massive hack has been all over the news) and stole my money resulting in canceled cards and no funds).
Shane went on Trek with the youth in our church. He got rained on, hailed on, and snow on while sleeping on the ground with no shelter. But he had a great time.
Noah had his three year heart transplant anniversary.

So there you have it. I know I'm missing tons of stuff but owell. And I do have some pictures that I plan on posting when I get a minute.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

Tender Mercies: It Means God Knows Who I am

2010-07-07T17:20:00.000-06:00

Some may count this experience as simply a nice coincidence, but I testify that the tender mercies of the Lord are real and that they do not occur randomly or merely by coincidence. Often, the Lord's timing of His tender mercies helps us to both discern and acknowledge them. - Elder David A. Bednar (The Tender Mercies of the Lord)

Tough and difficult times come to all of us. Sometimes we may even hit the bottom of what feels like a deep and dark abyss. I know there have been moments when I have felt so overwhelmed by whatever trouble is ailing me that it's hard to even imagine a time when things might be better. Yet, I continue to be amazed and comforted by a loving Father in Heaven who reaches out to me and help ease my pain.

Yesterday I spent the greater part of the day making myself sick with stress and panic. One thing after another continued to pile up on me until I felt so overwhelmed I couldn't even picture in my mind when things might be able to get better.

I laid in bed last night and begged Heavenly Father to ease my stress, to help me be strong to get through the trials as we continue working on solutions. I woke up today hopeful for brighter times and God reminded me that he knows who I am and listens to my prayers. There were a few key items that we just needed to go our way today and they did. Are my problems fixed? No, I still have many serious things we're facing but to have these few things go our way did in fact help ease my burdens and shows me that my Heavenly Father hears my prayers. He reminded me that he loves me and while it may not be in the plans to have all my burdens taken away, he gave me a small reprieve to ease my pain.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

Noah's Three Year Heart Day

2010-07-05T21:17:00.000-06:00

On Wednesday July 7th, it will be three years since Noah's heart transplant. I've republished the post I wrote right after he received his new heart over at Noah's Adventure.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

Thoughts on This Independence Day

2010-07-04T15:58:00.000-06:00

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

The two most important documents affecting the destiny of America are the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution of the United States. Both of these inspired, immortal papers relate primarily to the freedom of the individual. Founded upon that principle of free enterprise fostered by these documents, the United States of America, in less than two centuries, has achieved a greatness that far exceeds that of any other country in the world. - President David O. Mckay, Conference Report, October 1966, First Day—Morning Meeting, p.5

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

According to the laws and constitution of the people, which I have suffered to be established, and should be maintained for the rights and protection of all flesh, according to just and holy principles; That every man may act in doctrine and principle pertaining to futurity, according to the moral agency which I have given unto him, that every man may be accountable for his own sins in the day of judgment. Therefore, it is not right that any man should be in bondage one to another. And for this purpose have I established the Constitution of this land, by the hands of wise men whom I raised up unto this very purpose, and redeemed the land by the shedding of blood. - Doctrine and Covenants - Section 101:77 - 80

This year as I sat and watched the local firework display my thoughts turned to this wonderful nation. To the freedoms and liberties we have been given, to the people who sacrificed so much and to those who continue to sacrifice that we may be a free nation. This country was founded by divine direction by noble men who trusted in a higher power and it is this heritage that I am profoundly grateful for. I am honored and proud to be an American. I will fight against any power, foreign or domestic, that tries to take away my freedom or destroy this great nation.

The American Dream is the opportunity to work hard and be successful in a land with religious freedom where the Constitution ensures your rights and liberties. This nation has been successful and great because of it. I hope all of my fellow American's remember their freedoms this Independence Day. I hope you all remember that freedom isn't free. We have to stand up for what is right and protect it from anyone or anything that tries to take it away from us.

Should we counsel people, "Just live your religion. There's no need to get involved in the fight for freedom"? No, we should not, because our stand for freedom is a most basic part of our religion; this stand helped get us to this earth, and our reaction to freedom in this life will have eternal consequences. Man has many duties, but he has no excuse that can compensate for his loss of liberty. - Elder Ezra Taft Benson, Conference Report, October 1966, Afternoon Meeting, p.122

We again warn our people in America of the constantly increasing threat against our inspired Constitution and our free institutions set up under it. The same political tenets and philosophies that have brought war and terror in other parts of the world are at work amongst us in America. The proponents thereof are seeking to undermine our own form of government and to set up instead one of the forms of dictatorship now flourishing in other lands. These revolutionists are using a technique that is as old as the human race, - a fervid but false solicitude for the unfortunate over whom they thus gain mastery, and then enslave them. - Messages of the First Presidency of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 6 vols. 6:,p.151

"The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself." - Benjamin Franklin

And now as to the last neutralizer that the devil uses most effectively-it is simply this: "Don't do anything in the fight for freedom until the Church sets up its own specific program to save the Constitution." This brings us right back to the scripture I opened with today-to those slothful servants who will not do anything until they are "compelled in all things." Maybe the Lord will never set up a specific church program for the purpose of saving the Constitution. Perhaps if he set one up at this time it might split the Church asunder, and perhaps he does not want that to happen yet for not all the wheat and tares are fully ripe. - Elder Ezra Taft Benson, Conference Report, April 1965, Afternoon Meeting, p.125

In memory of our God, our religion, and freedom, and our peace, our wives, and our children - Book of Mormon - Alma 46:12

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

Picture Perfect - Summer 2010

2010-06-12T20:23:00.000-06:00

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

Suprise! I'm Still Here

2010-06-09T11:55:00.000-06:00

I never intended on taking a blogging break. I guess sometimes I find myself without much to say. My husband, however, would disagree since he's constantly shushing me during movies and TV shows. But I knew I was ready to post again when I started writing in my head through out the day.

Lot's has happened over the last few months. I won't try to share it all in one post. Unfortunately for you, I have to stretch it out over several posts. I just hope I get them done. But the big news (that many of you probably already know thanks to Facebook) is that I'm having another baby! I'm due November 15th and since I'm always early I'm just shooting for after Halloween.

I've struggled with infertility in the past so I was concerned that the ruptured ectopic that left me without a tube would make it more difficult to have another baby. But I guess my fears were unfounded because two weeks later I was pregnant.

To conceive both Lilly and Noah I had to take Clomid - a medication that helps you ovulate; I don't usually ovulate on my own due to a hormone imbalance. I also had to stay horizontal for a full 12 hours to help things get where they needed to be (that's the trick that took me 2 years to figure out and as soon as I did it I got pregnant). I had to do the same things to get pregnant last time (the ectopic) so I honestly didn't think it would happen any other way. But I should have known better. Because two weeks after my surgery (and recovery from pneumonia) I got pregnant without medication or "tricks".

I'm beyond grateful. It has helped reaffirm to me that this baby is meant to be here. That being said, I am still scared. Just like any mother would be, I think. I do try very hard not to even think about that sort of thing though since I can't control what happens. But just to help avoid any surprises this time around, I have my main ultrasound next week and two weeks later I will have a fetal echo to make sure the baby's heart is okay.

All in all, I'm actually doing quite well. That is story for a post all it's own (which I'll share soon). My only real "pregnancy complaint" is that my hair is falling out. In the past, it's stopped falling out while I was pregnant only to come out with a vengeance after the baby was born. That, I believe, is how it's suppose to work. This time around my hair is coming out in handfuls. When I shower I put the fallen-out hair aside (clumps of it) to throw away and yet my drain has already clogged 4 times in the past few months. It's really quite annoying. The Dr did say I was anemic so I'm already taking an iron supplement. I just hope it's not my Thyroid. But then, that's just the hypochondriac in me showing it's ugly face. It's probably nothing.

Coming up, I hope to share some pictures of Lilly's recent Preschool graduation (too cute for words), Noah's 3rd birthday party, and I even have Easter pics and a few family fun day stories. But since we all know just how dependable at blogging I am, I'm not making any promises.

I would like to hear from all of you that have been kind enough to stick around. Any advice on the hair loss thing? Or even just a shout out in general so I know who you are. **hugs**

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

The "I Love You" Way

2010-05-18T16:19:00.000-06:00

A few weeks ago my church had our Stake Conference. Shane was asked to speak in the adult session on Saturday evening. He did a fabulous job sharing his testimony and gospel principles regarding the blessings of Eternal Families and Temple Marriage.

We also had Elder Tate from the Quorum of the Seventy and his wife come and speak to us. They shared wonderful messages about the Temple, reading the Book of Mormon, and increasing our spirituality. One of the messages shared really struck me and I wanted to share it with you. I didn't take notes and this was several weeks ago so I know I won't do the story justice but the message is important enough (especially to us mothers) that I have to try.

There was a family that he knew with a son who was about 12 years old. About this time their son started hanging out with the wrong crowd. He came home late with his clothes smelling like smoke. He kept getting in fights and refused to go to church. He was disrespectful and treated his family like garbage. His parents were beyond frustrated. They didn't know what to do. They tried talking to him but he wouldn't listen. They tried groundings but it didn't help. They felt like they were losing him.

One night he came home late as usual and smelled like smoke. His mother said good night as he stormed off to his room. He pretended he didn't hear. Her feelings of anger and frustration flared. She felt overwhelmed and confused. She prayed to Heavenly Father, as she had done many many times before, as only a mother can. "What can I do? How can I help him?"

" Love him."

She couldn't deny the answer she had received. "Love him."

She went to his room and stood by the open door. His lights were off and he was asleep in bed.

"Son, I love you", she whispered. Then walked away.

The next night she did the same thing. Every night she would go into his room and tell him how much she loved him. She would sit on his bed while he was sleeping. She would run her hands through his hair, stroke his face, and tell him how much he was loved.

She did this every single night for 5 years.

Eventually, he grew up and much to the surprise of his parents he began going to church again. Then the day came when he left to serve a mission.

Two years later, after he had returned home, he was in the kitchen making some lunch. Mother was in the living room visiting with a family friend who was having trouble with her own way-ward son.

"Tell me what I should do? You helped your son grow out of it. Give me some advice?"

She replied, "Just give him time. He will probably grow out of it like my son did."

Her son over heard and came into the living room. "Mom, that's not what happened. I didn't just grow out of it. You use to come into my room every single night and tell me that you loved me. You thought I was asleep but I wasn't. It was knowing that you loved me that helped me change."

Elder Tate went on to say that it may take us 5 years or 50 years but the time to love is when it's the hardest.

My mother's love for me was so great I have worked hard to justify it.
- Marc Chagall

No influence is so powerful as that of the mother.
- Sarah Josepha Hale

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

My Silence

2010-05-17T11:59:00.002-06:00

Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself and know that everything in this life has a purpose. - Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

A Special Discount For My Readers

2010-03-24T18:52:00.001-06:00

Wow! I have been a horrible blogger. Not that I am assuming anyone has noticed my absence... I'm merely stating a fact. But to make up for it, I have an awesome deal to share with you.

Remember back when I posted a review about Skin MD Natural? (If you don't remember, please go check it out).

Well, this stuff is amazing! Especially if you have dry or sensitive skin. Instead of being thick or pasty it's lightweight, thin, smooth and feels SO good. It's like putting on water that heals your skin.You can even get it with or without SPF15.

And now, just in time for the sunny season, all readers of my blog can save 20% off your purchase at www.skinmdnatural.com by using the code: MOAMB. The code is only available for the next 30 days. So stock up now.

How cool is that? Seriously?!?!?! Thank you Skin MD Natural! I am totally stocking up for the year.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

About Me

2010-03-04T15:15:00.001-07:00

I'm Crystal.

I first started blogging over at Noah's Adventure in 2007 a few days before my son was born. My intention was to have a creative outlet and join the blogging world but when Noah ended up having a very serious Congenital Heart Defect it became a place to update family and friends while he waited for a Heart Transplant.

Since Noah had to go to a hospital out of state for his transplant,
I lived in a Ronald McDonald House with my daughter Lilly and my sister Jen (she put her life on hold to come help me) while my husband, Shane, stayed home for work (and the much needed health insurance). After a few weeks of hospital and RMH life, I needed an outlet that wasn't just about Noah's and his adventure. That was when Memoirs of a Mommy was born and I've been blogging here ever since.

Through out my life I have faced near fatal injuries from a car accident and then a miraculous recovery, years of infertility followed by the birth of my two sweet children, nearly losing one of them, and daily life as a working wife and mother while struggling with chronic pain and health issues that I have yet to be given a diagnosis for. Faith and a relationship with Christ and my Heavenly Father give me the strength and the hope I need to face each new day and each new experience with a smile on my face. I've learned that life is much too short and much too precious not to enjoy regardless of what trials you are given. I am grateful for every moment of every single day.

I love to look for and enjoy the beauty in the world. I've enjoyed photography ever since I was in High School but never have enough time to practice and strengthen my skills. It is a fun hobby when I find the time though. I also love science: health related stuff, technology, astronomy (I subscribed to Astronomy Magazine for years), and chemistry.... those kinds of things. I also love to cook but hate doing the dishes. I am not creative in any sense of the world but I envy people who are.

My blog is nothing special. Just the thoughts and stories of a Christian mother who is being taught to fly.

"When you come to the edge of all the light you know and are about to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things will happen. There will be solid ground to stand on or you will be taught to fly."
-Author Unknown

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

A Summer Bouquet

2010-02-25T20:28:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago I was contacted by a woman named Sarah who has an online Jewelry store called LuShae Jewelry. She wanted to know if I would be willing to review one of her items for her. Uhm... hello! Of course! What a fun opportunity.

She sent me the link and let me pick out any item of my choice. This was a tough decision. Everything was so fabulous! I was originally drawn to the earrings. Well, if you want to be specific, I really had my eyes on these. All you have to do is check them out to know why. But after a tough decision making process in which I enlisted to help of my fabulous Facebook friends, I decided on this beauty:

Yeah, I squeeled with delight. No joke!

So, I placed my order and before I could even do a load of laundry my package arrived in the mail. It really only took a day or two. It was probably one of the fastest online purchases I have ever made (and I do most of my shopping online).

I opened the box and to my pleasant surprise the pendant was even more beautiful than in the picture. I tried to take pictures to show you but the lighting just wasn't doing me any favors.

I've been wearing it for the past month. One; because I love it and two; because I wanted to give it a fair review and make sure it was a quality piece. Now, all I can say is that I love it even more now than I did before. It's BEAUTIFUL! The colors go with everything and I love the sparkle from it (without it being overwhelming or too dressy of course). My thought is that it works for every day wear and also when I dress up a bit for date night or something. Hopefully the fashion guru's out there would agree because that's what I've been wearing it with.

My one and only complaint is that the chain it came with is a bit small for my pleasantly plump neck. It does fit and isn't as tight as a choker would be, but I would have preferred a chain that was a bit longer. Luckily, I happen to have one already so I easily switched it out. But in all honesty, I do like to wear my necklaces a bit lower than most so I doubt many would have an issue with the chain it came with. If it fit around my neck in the first place it must be a pretty good length.

I really do love my new bouquet of flowers. Sarah, thank you SO very much for allowing me this fabulous opportunity. I love your store, the ease and quickness of the purchase and above all, I love the necklace. Thank you, Thank you!!

Please go check out LuShae Jewelry. Look around at all the beautiful items and if you feel like getting something, rest assured that you are in very good hands. You can even grab a fun badge to add to your sidebar like I did.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

To Shane

2010-02-19T01:10:00.000-07:00

Watching you sleep on the couch tonight made me smile. This is the song that came to mind...

You're a falling star, You're the get away car.
You're the line in the sand when I go too far.
You're the swimming pool, on an August day.
And you're the perfect thing to say.

And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute.
Ah, When you smile at me you know exactly what you do.
Baby don't pretend, that you don't know it's true.
Cause you can see it when I look at you.

And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

You're a carousel, you're a wishing well,
And you light me up, when you ring my bell.
You're a mystery, you're from outer space,
You're every minute of my everyday.

And I can't believe, uh that I'm your (wo)man,
And I get to kiss you baby just because I can.
Whatever comes our way, ah we'll see it through,
And you know that's what our love can do.

And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La

And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.
You're every song, and I sing along.
'Cause you're my everything.
Yeah, yeah

So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

This song is "Everything" by Michael Buble.

Random Thought Of the Night

2010-02-19T00:23:00.000-07:00

I miss having a phone that I can blog from. Maybe...... Maybe I should go back to my BB Curve (since I can't afford a new one).

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

It's Just My Luck

2010-02-09T13:23:00.000-07:00

It may be just my luck but I mean it in more ways than one.

Shane and I made the difficult decision to have another baby. I say the decision was difficult because any time you have a child with health concerns like Noah, having another baby is a scary option. But we both have had very personal experiences that have convinced us that our family is not finished so we started trying for another.

I have some fertility issues known as PCOS (Poly-cystic Ovarian Syndrome). Big words that mean I don't ovulate. I tried for two years while taking fertility medication before I finally got pregnant with Lilly. Noah didn't take as long. So this time around, I knew what I needed to do to get started and I began taking medication that would help induce ovulation. I was very surprised to find out that it worked the first round!

I was six weeks along and on Friday night I began experiencing horrible pain that just came out of nowhere. BAM! It hurt so bad I couldn't move or breath but I know that my pain threshold (the level you begin feeling pain at) is very low so I tried to just live through it. The next morning I felt better but by Saturday afternoon, the pain was back. Hours and hours of it. Still.... I just lived with it. By this point, I figured I was just having a miscarriage. (Hence my cryptic Facebook post about being sad. Sorry about that. I hate being vague. I just wasn't ready to share it yet.) Anyways, I woke up Sunday morning and the pain was better. Still very tender but better. Sunday night it came back with a vengeance and I finally started bleeding. I called the OB Emergency Services and they confirmed for me that there was nothing they could do to stop it at only 6 weeks. There was no need to come in unless I began bleeding very heavily. So I went to bed.

Monday morning came and I wasn't bleeding anymore but my entire stomach area was so tender. It hurt to move. So I called my Dr's office and spoke with a N.P. that was available. She said she was concerned about the pain and wanted me to come in to have an ultrasound right away. I jumped out of bed and drove right there.

I had a vaginal ultrasound done, so they could see more details. Afterward, I sat and waited a very long time while she showed the results to the Dr. I knew it wasn't good. And it wasn't.

Not only did I have an ectopic pregnancy, but it had ruptured and I was bleeding internally. The damage was so bad that she couldn't even see any signs of a pregnancy that might have been there. All she could see was damage and blood.

I was taken over to the ER and admitted. While I didn't feel sick, just pain, I knew it was a very serious issue by how fast they got things figured out and scheduled. I was prepped and in surgery by 9:30pm. Luckily, my sister was able to go watch the kids and Shane made it up here in time to give me a Priesthood blessing and a kiss before I was taken into the OR.

As they wheeled me down the hall, I said a prayer. I told Heavenly Father that I wanted to pray that they would be able to fix everything and save everything but what it really came down to was that I just wanted to wake up and be able to go home and see my babies again. Then, I tried very hard not to be afraid and to have faith.

I woke up several hours later, groggy and itchy (darn anesthesia) but well. It turns out that they were not able to save my fallopian tube. It was beyond repair and wouldn't stop bleeding. But they were able to get everything cleaned up and fixed. And while it might take me longer to conceive again, it can happen. I am at greater risk now for developing another ectopic, but with early and routine tests I can go on to have another baby.

I've been told that I am very lucky. Most woman who end up having a rupture and hemorrhaging like I did, bleed out and even die. It's even more apparent just how lucky I am when you think that I suffered with it for 4 days before I came to the hospital. So while it was just my luck to actually have this be something this serious it is also my luck to have survived and come out of it okay. One more blessing, in a long list of many, that I can attribute to my Heavenly Father.

My life seems to be this story of never ending extraordinary blessings. I have several memories from my childhood of such events. Then of course, there is my car accident and unbelievable recovery and Noah and his miracle. Now this.

Thank you to those of you who prayed and sent up good thoughts on my behalf. Thank you to those of you who have offered service for my family during my recovery. My gratitude is beyond expression. I pray that God will bless you and give you the righteous desires of your heart. That you will be blessed for the kindness that you have shown to me. I love you all.

I may not know who said it but I know their message is true....

"When you come to the edge of all the light you know and are about to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things will happen. There will be solid ground to stand on or you will be taught to fly."
-Author Unknown

....because I am being taught to fly.

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.

A Plea for Help

2010-02-04T19:17:00.000-07:00

Two and a half years ago, my life was forever changed.

Someone I didn't know, chose to donate their loved one's organs and in the process, saved my son's life. Because of their selfless act, Noah has the opportunity to experience life and I've been given more time with my baby.

But even before Noah was born, I have always been insistent that I was going to be an organ donor. I have always felt that it was the ultimate act of kindness. That no matter how I died, I could do it saving someone's life.

Since then, I have realized that you don't have to wait until you die to save someone's life. And that is what I want to share with you today. You see, a little over a year ago I came across a blog called Living in Grace. It's written by a woman named Kelli who is in desperate need of a new kidney.

Kelli is the married mom of two and in Stage 5 kidney failure. She began dialysis in 5/06 and was listed at Porter Adventist Hospital in Denver to wait for a cadaver donor transplant in 3/07.

Since then, it has been determined that she can't have a cadaver kidney and will need a living kidney donor, so she began the process of being approved into the transplant program at OHSU in Portland, OR last January. Kelli and her entire family moved to Oregon to facilitate the process.

A few weeks ago, she finally got accepted and the hospital has begun testing possible donors.

Did you know that you don't have to have two kidneys to live? You only need one. And I believe with all of my heart that the purpose behind us having two is so that we can give one to someone in need. Maybe you could even consider giving one to Kelli. Consider being her hero and giving her more time with her children.

The ultimate gift. The gift of life.

If by chance you are interested in being tested to see if you are a match for Kelli, or someone you know might be, here is some information about the living donor process:

She is listed with OHSU in Portland, OR. You can email her at jkbach@comcast.net and she will get you the contact info you need.
She needs a donor with the A or O blood type. If you don't know your blood type, they will have you get tested.
All medical costs are billed directly back to OHSU where her insurance covers 100% of all incurred costs. This allows the donor candidate to have all testing up to the end done at their local hospital or Dr. office at no charge to them.
Pre-screening involves an over the phone health questionnaire, then a simple blood test where her blood and the possible donor's are combined and cross-matched. If that is ok, then they will have a series of tests done locally (to the donor) and billed directly to her insurance.
All this will lead up to a scheduled date for everyone to meet in Portland for transplant. The process, from the time a suitable candidate is found, is about 3 months to the actual surgery.
Fundraising is currently under way for all costs not covered by insurance (all non-medical). This includes things like travel and lodging for the donor, her housing and support for the month or more she is required to stay in Portland after surgery, etc.

I know this isn't an easy decision to make. And if you decide you are not in a position to be able to be a living donor I hope that you will still consider helping Kelli in her quest. Help her spread the word or maybe even donate to her fund raising efforts. Someone out there is a match and can give this woman back her life. Can give her children one more day with their mom.

Maybe it's you.

Much Love,

Be A Hero. Be An Organ Donor.