The Open Mike

Christmas Wishlist 2010

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Mon, 29 Nov 2010 16:40:00 +0000

Last year, we decided we wanted to do something special for a family for Christmas. We heard about two boys who had lost their mother and 5-year-old sister due to a murder. The two boys, who are now living with their grandparents, would be going through their first Christmas without them. mzLive put together a benefit concert and raised over $1000 to buy gifts for them. The gifts were delivered to the surprised family at their house the next week. It was a complete success. We could not have done it without the help we received from everyone involved.

This year, we plan to do it again. This time for a family that will probably not have a Christmas due to financial issues, and a recent break-in that left them with only a couple of pieces of furniture. We ask that you come out to the Liquid Lounge in Dallas on Saturday, December 11th, for a time of music and comedy. The proceeds raised from the entry fee, will go to buy gifts for this family. If you can't make it, but would like to donate, we've set up a PayPal account. Any amount would be greatly appreciated.

We will be surprising the family at their house on Friday, December 17th. Make sure you're listening to www.mzliveonline.com to catch this LIVE. We will give out more details on the family as we move closer to the 17th. We like to try and keep this info under-wraps so we don't risk spoiling the surprise.

Thank you for your support.

Let's make miracles happen like Jerry Lewis. <- I'm pretty sure I stole that.

- M

The Double Cheeseburger that changed everything...

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 01:05:00 +0000

A week ago, I saw this video:

The double rainbow guy. At that point, it had around 400 views. As of writing this, it now has almost 3.5 million views. So I figured I'd make fun of it with my video, Double Cheeseburger. I posted it last Monday and in a week it has over 5,000 (five thousand) views. If you haven't seen it, check it out below:

I will say, that performing this part was one of the hardest acting moments of my career. It was a very dark role and took alot out of me emotionally...

Had I known so many people would enjoy a video of me crying and trippin' out in front of a double cheeseburger, I would have done it YEARS ago. This video beat out my Save the Nova video I posted over 4 years ago!

I just wanted to thank all the people who helped make this video possible. They (us in show biz) say never work with animals, kids, or cheeseburgers, but I'm in this to break rules. I'm not in this for the money, acting is an art form. I'm here to tell a story. Double Cheeseburger is perhaps one of the greatest and deepest stories ever told. And it was told in only 3:42. I hope I can inspire and change people with this piece of art as it has changed me.

Thank you,
KEEP LOOKIN' UP!
- M

Find the Differences | Vol #2

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Sun, 20 Jun 2010 23:37:00 +0000

I can't watch a Nicolas Cage movie without waiting for him to s-st-stutter a line or talk about an invisible rabbit. Just like my previous 'differences' post about Lil' Wayne and Whoopi Goldberg, I believe Jimmy Stewart and Nicolas Cage are one and the same. I've said this for years. My calls to the 'power that be' have never been returned. Nobody wants to talk about it, but people need to know the truth.

I have even mentioned this to Nick's National Treasure co-star, Justin Bartha. Justin knew something, but couldn't say anything other than, "Yeah, I kinda see what you mean." I know there is more he wanted to say, but he has to be careful with Disney watching his every move. I just hope this can go public soon so we can hurry up and make It's A Wonderful Life 2. Yes, I would want to play Clarence.

Knight Rider Nova. The way it should of been...

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Mon, 31 May 2010 06:47:00 +0000

A couple of years ago, NBC said they wanted to revise the classic 1980's TV show, Knight Rider. The result was a talking Mustang and horrible acting. Yes, even worse than the 1980's classic. It came as no surprise that the revised show was canceled after just one season. It was lucky to make it past 13 episodes.

I feel as if NBC should of picked a better car to be KITT instead of a pathetic Mustang. Something real. Something dangerous. Something people could believe in. That's why I created this 44 second trailer showing NBC what I KNOW would work. Check it out:

Awesome right? I can just see it now. Heck, I'd even be up to playing Michael. Seeing as how my name is Michael too. NBC, I will be waiting for your call.

Today, EVERYTHING Changes

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 13:31:00 +0000

My first post for 2010 has been carefully planned. Strategically timed. As you may or may not know, today's date happens to coincide with one of the biggest blessings hand crafted by God himself. Something I've dreamed about for years, but never thought possible. Today is the release of KFC's Double Down.

I can hear the words of the late, great Don Lafontaine now: "In a world where Ronald McDonald is harassed daily for selling Happy Meals to kids, comes a secret weapon in the fight against heathy foods." This anti-PETA sandwich stands for way more than just another awesome food idea. It stands for American freedom. It's what we fight for daily. I know very well this sandwich could be my last. But we only live once. God bless America.

The End of 2009

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Sat, 26 Dec 2009 02:58:00 +0000

Earlier this year, mzLive launched. Fast forward to the end of 2009, and we ended the last show of the year by bringing gifts to a special family. This family lost their mother and their younger sister a few months ago, and we knew the first Christmas would be tough. I couldn't believe how well everything turned out. Our goal was to raise a thousand dollars by putting on a charity concert. That weekend, we raised MORE than a thousand.

Watch us surprise the family at their house on December 18th. You can also hear the conversation I had with the boys' grandfather at mzliveonline.com.

All in all, I think we ended the year on a high note. I look forward to see what the show does next year. We've added some awesome members to our production team, so I know we're going to be able to pull of anything we do next year. Thanks to everyone who helped make Christmas Wishlist possible. We'll see you guys next year...
-m

Christmas Wishlist '09

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 13:39:00 +0000

A couple of months ago, I walked into the studio and asked the cast and crew of mzLive what they thought about helping out a needy family this Christmas. Without hesitation, EVERYONE wanted to do it. So it was a go. We didn't have much time to put this together. The hardest part? Finding the right family that needed help.

One of our new producers, Erica, told us about a family that was on the news recently. The kids in this family had gone through stuff no one should ever go through. This Christmas, would be their first one after the horrible tragedy they've been through. We knew this was the family we wanted to help. We'll tell the family's story on the air, December 18th at 9PM CST. We're trying to keep the details under wraps so that the family doesn't find out what we're doing.

So here's the plan:
On December 18th, live on the air, we will show up at their house with a car full of gifts and local celebrities, and TRY to make their Christmas just a little better. But we need your help. We are currently taking money & toy donations until December 17th. We also have a Christmas concert/party at the Liquid Lounge THIS SATURDAY, December 12 at 9PM, and the door goes to the family! So show up and enjoy some music by some great artists. You can also donate there or online at www.mzliveonline.com.

We can't do this without you guys. If you have any questions or want more details, let me know.

You're not gonna want to miss out on this.
Thanks guys!

Eight years ago, my life changed forever...

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 15:07:00 +0000

It was a cold, wet Thanksgiving morning, when I took that rusty electric razor to my mexi stash for the first time. Little did I know it would change my life forever.

Yesterday, November 22, 2009, marked the 8th anniversary of this momentous occasion. It was a time of reflection and remembrance, followed by a few tears.

Today, I plead with every Mexican to PLEASE stop and shave. You've been trying to grow that thing for 15 years now, and it still looks the same. The Pedro look was so 2004. You're never going to be a Geraldo Rivera. Do yourself a favor and pluck it.

Remembering the Nova

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 14:46:00 +0000

Today marks the 5th anniversary of the 1987 Chevy Nova death. A nova that touched so many people's lives. A nova that will live in our hearts forever.

Today, in honor of it's death, we will be offering a FREE download of the hit song, What You Drive Boy. You can hear/download the song here.

You can read the story and find out more on the Nova at www.michaelzavala.com/savethenova.

RIP Nova - 1987-2004.

The Web Welcomes Two MZ Facelifts

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 06:39:00 +0000

After months and months of PURE procrastination, two MZ sites finally get a facelift.

The first is my personal site, www.michaelzavala.com, which had been 'coming soon' for almost a year now. In all honesty, it wasn't even touched until a month ago. However, it's now complete and is your source for up to the minute updates for anything Michael Zavala. You can also watch videos, see my Twitter updates, and more all in one place. Yep. It took us all year to do that. I also wanted to give a quick shout out to Tony Forte, who designed my new logo, and Austin Wright for taking some of pictures on the site.

Next up is mzLive, www.mzliveonline.com. We made it cleaner and WAY more user friendly. You can now watch the show live or pre-recorded from the main page. You can also, check out the recent guests and get the lastest news without clicking around.

I'm proud to annouce that, as of today (November 1st, 2009), both sites are now online! Keep checking back because we'll be adding new features and updates regularly.

Doing My Part to Save the Human Race

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 15:09:00 +0000

With the season of giving right around the corner, I thought I would do something to give back to mankind. We live in a world of child extortionist *cough* Jon and Kate, weirdos *cough* Heenes', and people who should never be allowed to procreate *cough* Spencer Pratt.

With that in mind, I've created a new charity aimed at solving these problems, saving these children, and in addition, save the human race. Today, my charity will start to give FREE vasectomies to people who are unfit to raise children.

Now, you may ask, what do I have to do to get Uncle Tom one of these FREE vasectomies for Christmas? Well, I'm glad you ask. All you have to do is fill out our one page application, and we take it from there. It's THAT easy. We tie up and kidnap these potential Octo-parents, and perform the procedure in our mobile vasectomy unit (MVU for short). Once it's over, you will receive a certificate of authenticity.

So what are you waiting for? Let's do out part to save the children...and mankind.

Michael Zavala
Director of SNIP (Saving Numerous Infants Personally)

Top 5 Annoyances from June 09

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 00:59:00 +0000

Here's my top 5 Annoyance from last month! Hit me up on Twitter (@michaelzavala) if you want to add some of your own annoyances. I want to hear them.

So here we go.

#5 - Circus Peanuts

Ok, fine. These have been around forever. But just the THOUGHT of these things give me a headache and makes my stomach sick. Why are people still buying this crap?!

#4 - Kendra Wilkinson's Laugh

Just when we thought it was over...she's back. With a show all about HER and her LAUGH. Nothing makes a girl LESS attractive than an annoying laugh.

To make matters worse, her face doesn't move.

And yes, I'll post baby pictures when I can.

Don't get me wrong...I'm still answering her phone calls. I'm just not telling as many jokes. Acutally, I'm not telling any jokes.

Don't beleive me about the laugh? Just check out this Youtube video.

Case and point.

#3 - Is it Follow Friday EVERYDAY?

If you're not on Twitter, then you won't get this one. Just know that you should be annoyed. I love #followfriday. I get alot of followers from it. However, there is NEVER a day that goes by that someone doesn't ask the question, "Is it Follow Friday EVERYDAY?" I'm pretty sure the name explains itself. Follow FRIDAY.

That's just as stupid as asking if it's Super Bowl Sunday EVERY SUNDAY?

#2 - Perez Hilton

You guys should of seen this one coming. I don't think I really have to get into how annoying this person is.

Let's just say, I wish I could of thrown a few hits in there myself as would most of America and all of Hollywood.

I'm a big supporter in the #unfollowperezhilton movement on Twitter. We made him, now it's time to put him away.

#1 - Spencer Pratt

I'll be honest. This was a tough one. It was a close call between him and Perez, but Pratt won...by a hair.

Welcome the king of Tools and the Idol of Douchebags, Spencer Pratt.

I didn't include Hiedi because she didn't bother me as much and he did. Maybe she will this month, only time will tell.

Congrats for making NUMBA 1! Just like you always wanted SP.

Find the Differences | Vol #1

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 04:12:00 +0000

So the brass at mzCorporate started a new game to give back to the community during this economic crisis. Welcome to Find the Differences: Whoopi & Lil' Wayne Edition! Mark down the differences and scroll down for the answer.

Ready?

Go.

Done?

Let's go over the answers.

There are no difference between them. They are one and the same. Sorry to all the tween guys that have all those Whoopi Goldberg posters hanging in their room. The same goes for all the US post offices that have posters of Lil' Wayne. Sorry to bust your bubble. The truth has been uncovered.

Mk.Bye.

Letterman | Palin : Give it up already.

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 12:11:00 +0000

Sarah Palin,

I'm assuming that you miss the spotlight. You take a joke from one of America's beloved comedians, purposely twist it, and go on a victim tour. Slow news, so instant publicity! Clever...

...or ridiculously stupid.

This has been going on for almost a week. Give it up. EVERYONE knew what David meant. Your daughter Bristol DID get knocked up, so here goes the jokes. Who knew you had another daughter? Even if they did, Bristol is the name people think of when they hear "Palin's daughter." Now, if you really didn't know what Letterman meant, then we have a serious problem. You might need to be step down from office.

Also, WHAT in the world are you doing trying to make David look like a pedophile? Come on now. You're gonna go that low? And THEN you want to run for President in 2012?? Ha, come on now.

Letterman apologized on Monday's show, but I personally think he should not have done that. He didn't do anything wrong. Like I always say: If you have to explain the joke, then you're just stupid.

Pick your battles carefully next time. I think you're gonna just be shooting yourself in the foot this time. I'm not gonna be able to stick up for you this time. The "hot mom" card won't save you this time, Doncha know.

TV not working today?

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 13:18:00 +0000

If you're wondering why you're not getting any channels today, it's because stations are now 100% digital.

You can get more info on all this at www.dtv.gov/.

The switch was originally planned for February, but Obama extended it by another four months. He felt like not everybody had a chance to prepare for the switch. My 80-something Great Grandmother has had her converter boxes for over a year now. She had more than enough notice. I bought HDTV's over two years ago. But no matter HOW much time you give people to prepare, there are still some procrastinators. The tax dates are the same every year, but we STILL have people who miss those deadlines.

Some stations were allowed to switch back in February. However, postponing the switch wasn't really a good idea because it cost other stations lots of money. Not the best idea during these economic times...but that's a blog for another time.

It's probably not a good idea to head over to your local Radio Shack or Best Buy today. They will most likely be out-of-stock of the Digital Converter boxes. If you're using cable or satellite, then you're ok. No worries there.

If you're one of these procrastinators, don't complain when on Monday you won't be able to watch Oprah...you have no one to blame but yourself...the end.

Don't mind us New York, we're just flying a 747 uncomfortably close to your buildings...

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 12:39:00 +0000

So picture this. You're in your office in Manhattan, just going about your day, when you hear the loud rumble of a low flying 747 above your building. What is the first thing you would do? Most likely you would drop everything and get the heck out of that building. That's exactly what people did on Monday.

This low flying 747 turned out to be one of the Air Force Ones (when the president is on board). This plane "was taking part in a classified, government-sanctioned photo shoot." Classified. In Manhattan. Great thinking.

Turns out this classified secret mission was to update the file photos for Air Force One. Why? Does Air Force One have a Myspace? Why does it have to be flying? Can't you snap pictures on the ground??

The White House has issued an apology. But WHO gives the OK to DO THIS? C'mon guys.

More idiots.

Get more details: http://tinyurl.com/d6tzw9

Give it up Rick Ross - Really.

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 12:32:00 +0000

"I mean, I'm a fan of Eminem," he said. "I'm a fan first and foremost. But after defeating Curly, my confidence is at an all-time high. Maybe before I wouldn't have challenged him, but I'm contemplating it now. The game is commending me for my victory. That's all I wanted to do was ... punish the opposition. I think I've done a great job and I'm gonna continue to do that."
[STORY]

Are you kidding me Ross-man?

Rick and 50 Cent have been having (what we call in the hip hop world) beef. And no, it's not a meal.

Mr. Ross has pretty much declared victory in this beef, so now he wants to move on and take on Eminem.

For one thing Lil' Ricky, Eminem is the LAST person you should start stuff with. Em is probably THE best lyricist out there. And there is NO way you're gonna come out of this looking good. Yeah, you might of smashed 50 but who cares. Neither one of you sell albums anyways. Leaving the rapping to the pros.

And shut up. If you stay quite, people might actually buy your crap.

Texas to become a Nation? Rick Perry REALLY wants/needs your votes.

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 12:28:00 +0000

I wasn't going to blog about this, but this is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

Texas to become a nation? REALLY Rick Perry??

Just to recap, On April 15th (tax day) people across the country put together anti-tax "tea parties." Let's stop right here for a second. How long have we been paying taxes? What's that? All our lives? Oh, ok. So why NOW in 2009 do we tell the world how much we hate taxes? These people get together (because they don't have anything better to do) and hold up homemade signs as they take a bite of a sandwich that was PAID for with TAX PAYER money. Idiots.

Don't get me wrong, I don't like paying taxes either, but it's part of life. And it HAS helped people (in one way or another) that needed it over the years INCLUDING you.

Well at one of these tea parties, the governor of Texas, Rick Perry said Texas could secede from the Union if it wanted. He went on to say "We've got a great union. There's absolutely no reason to dissolve it. But if Washington continues to thumb their nose at the American people, you know, who knows what might come out of that. But Texas is a very unique place, and we're a pretty independent lot to boot."

Ok...first off, if you say the phrase "lot to boot," maybe you shouldn't be running a state. Sorry.

Now for the soapbox.

This is the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. We're not gonna LEAVE just because we're having problems. What does that say about us? What does that say about YOU Rick Perry? We're IN THIS TOGETHER! As I recall, we're also PART of the problem. I'm sorry Rick Perry, if you have to unhitch Texas from the UNITED STATE OF AMERICA, you've got some issues, and you DO NOT have my vote. If you're trying to say something that will get you votes and make people like you, say you saw the new Hannah Montana movie and liked it.

I love Texas. Born and raised. But if this crap happens, I'm out. I'm an American and I'm not gonna run away because of a problems. We do this together. For better or for worse. Maybe you should leave. How can we ever get our head above water when people in charge, like you, keep draggin' us down?

Next time you're looking for votes, say something smart.

Radical.

STORY IS HERE

What is the world coming to when you can't trust a pirate?

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 14:10:00 +0000

Read the story here: http://tinyurl.com/d2z332

Check it.

On Wednesday, a US cargo ship was boarded by pirates. Pirates. In the year 2009.
This stuff has been happening for a while now, but it's just so ridiculous.

Well the crew of the ship, Maersk Alabama, captured one of the pirates. Good right? I'm not sure how it happened, but the captain of the Maersk Alabama was captured by the pirates and moved to a lifeboat with the rest of the motley crew. From what I heard the captain, Richard Phillips, did this in a move to try and save the crew and the ship. Which is cool.

The PLAN was for the Maersk Alabama to return the pirate they had, and then the pirates would return the captain. So how do you think this is going to go down? We've all seen the movies.

Here is a direct quote from Ken Quinn (second in commmand). "We returned him, but they didn't return the captain," Quinn said.

WHAT?! A pirate you can't trust?!

Hasn't Johnny Deep taught us anything? Live and learn I guess.

All in all. We hope the captain and his crew get home safely.

But next time we go into the "water ghettos," lets make sure we've got some big o' cannons on the side of them ships. We need to be packin.

Just not feelin' "Lost"

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Sat, 28 Mar 2009 05:48:00 +0000

I have to be honest. I just wasn't feelin' this weeks' Lost. I can't figure out what bugged me, but I felt like I was watching the show for the first time. I had no idea what was going on. Everything has changed. Too much changed. It wasn't even needed.

I think the writers have written themselves into a wall. I'm not sure they can get out of it. I hope I'm wrong, but time will tell. I want to go into detail, but I know there are some people who havn't seen the episode yet...

But, if they change the show too much, it will lose it's magic.

This guy is giving cops a bad name...

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 21:36:00 +0000

Before you continue, read this.

This guy is an extreme example of a bad cop. I happen to be friends with a lot of police officers and I know that MOST officers are nothing like this. But everybody has bad days, and sometimes even the best of us can look like a monster.

So this is why I think police should have MUCH more accountability for their actions. Every cop should be wired, recorded, and EVERY stop or confrontation should be reviewed before a ticket is issued. Sounds like alot of trouble, but it would solve alot of these problems. There wouldn't be any questions, and if a cop was in the wrong, it won't be our word against theirs.

Like my uncle Ben once said, "With great power, comes great responsibility."

Are we done with Obama's 'Special Olympics Remark' yet?

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Sat, 21 Mar 2009 19:08:00 +0000

On Thursday, President Obama went on the Tonight Show to talk to the 'real' people about the 'real' issues. At one point during the interview, they started talking about the president's bowling. Obama said he recently rolled a 129. He then added, "It's like — it was like Special Olympics, or something." Even before the show went on the air that night, Obama called Tim Shriver (Special Olympics chairman) and gave an apology. But that didn't stop it from making the front pages the next day.

Granted. It was a terrible thing to say. It should of never been said.

But everybody knows he's not good at talking. A great speaker, but horrible off the cuff. He was trying to get a laugh, since he WAS on a comedy show, and probably said the first thing that came to his head. It was terrible. But everyone says stuff from time to time. He said he was sorry, and now it's time to move on. No more stories, no more comments, lets just go. I think this country has alot more to worry about than a slip of the tongue.

LOST comes back this week!

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Sun, 15 Mar 2009 05:00:00 +0000

After a FULL week without Lost, it returns this Wednesday. I can't wait.

A few weeks ago on mzLive I said that there was a rumor going around that Evangeline Lilly (Kate) was auditioning on other shows for the fall season. That lead some to believe that she was leaving the show. Her publicist came out said that it wasn't true...but you know how that stuff goes. It better not be true. That is probably the only thing that will stop me from watching this show. But then again, who knows, I've been with this show for years now. It's like a relationship. I don't have time to find anyone new.

The preview of next weeks' show looks good. This honestly looks like the episode that will "change everything." The entire relationship of the castaways is going to be changed. It's interesting, but at the same time I hope they don't turn against each other or anything. At least not the core group. But time will tell. Hope everyone tunes in.

We Launch Tonight at 8PM CST...

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 17:57:00 +0000

mzLive will launch tonight at 8PM CST. If the show doesn't play in your city, you can WATCH the show LIVE via Stickam @ www.mzliveonline.com. Make sure you check it out! We have Carly Patterson in studio tonight.

Also, I'll be twittering todays' events leading up to the show. Everything from meetings, testing, setup...whatever. It will be twittered. You can see it at www.twitter.com/michaelzavala. The twittering starts @ 2PM CST.

See you guys tonight-

5 Day Countdown

noreply@blogger.com (Michael Zavala) — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 19:44:00 +0000

We have 5 days to go before mzLive launches! We just want everybody to know that if the show doesn't play in your town, you can just go to www.mzliveonline.com and WATCH it!

Also make sure you check twitter.com/michaelzavala on Friday, as Michael will be twittering the day as they prepare for the show.